SPRING 2015 NEWSLETTER Inside this issue: Caregivers appreciation, child care provider support visits 2 Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew 3-5 Responsible Adult course, Heart of the Matter Conference 6 Pro D, job opportunity, new CCRR resources 7 Story Telling: A building block of literacy 8 The Myth of the Perfect Parent Quentin from Halfmoon Bay Child Care Centre. 9-10 Prime Minister’s Awards 10 Early Years Fair 11 Stepping into Kindergarten Health Event 12 Locations: 5520 Trail Ave Sechelt 885-5657 659 North Road, Gibsons 886-3103 Fax: 604-885-5699 or 886-3106 Email: [email protected] Web: www.coastccrr.ca Facebook page Funded by the Province of BC Greetings all! Spring is definitely in the air! With crocuses and daffodils in full bloom it won’t be long now. I’m looking forward to getting out in the garden and planting a few things. At CCRR we have been busy organizing and cataloguing our new toys and resources for the lending library. We have purchased some beautiful wooden toys, some outdoor activities, felt stories, and new resource books for child care providers. Be sure to stop by either the Gibsons or Sechelt office and check out our new items. Coming soon to CCRR – Tracy has been busy working on an on-line catalogue to be launched soon on our website. This will make borrowing easier and more convenient. You will be able to browse the catalogue and reserve your selections for pick up at either our Gibsons or Sechelt office. If you are a licensed or registered child care centre and are unable to make it into the office, please give us a call and we can arrange for deliveries and pick-ups. Save the date – May 20th is Caregiver Appreciation Evening. Once again we will be hosting a dinner with activities to honour child care providers and celebrate the important work you do for our community. Please see inside the newsletter for details. The “Healthy Early Childhood Mental Health and Development” workshop on Saturday March 28th with Dr. Sonya Vellet is filling up quickly but there are still a few spaces available. Please give us a call or email us at [email protected] to register. CCRR will be hosting a booth at the Early Years Fair May 2 nd. We’re looking forward to the opportunity to visit with families and service providers. We hope to see you all there! I hope you all have a lovely spring planting season and don’t forget to “spring forward” on March 8th! Reminder— the CCRR offices will be CLOSED on APRIL 3 and APRIL 6 for the Easter long weekend! - Catherine May is Child Care Month! And to celebrate, we’re hosting our annual Caregivers Appreciation Evening Wednesday, May 20 at the Sunshine Coast Arts Centre in Sechelt. Join us for a “gourmet” dinner prepared by the CCRR chefs, games with prizes and a special activity. Child Care Provider Support Visits Would you like a supportive visit from a CCRR consultant? Have you always wanted to borrow from the lending library but don’t have the means to pick up or return items? Starting now, you can have both! Our team would love to pay you a visit, and bring resources from our newly updated lending library to your child care centre. We’ll read stories with props, set up science activities or invitations to explore and play. In addition, you can choose items from our new on-line library catalogue and we will arrange for monthly drop-offs and pick-ups. We’re booking now for spring visits. For more information or to book a visit call us at 604-8855657 or email [email protected]. 2 Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew by Ellen Notbohm Some days it seems the only predictable thing about it is the unpredictability. The only consistent attribute—the inconsistency. Autism can be baffling, even to those who spend their lives around it. The child who lives with autism may look “normal” but his behavior can be perplexing and downright difficult. Autism was once labeled an “incurable disorder,” but that notion has crumbled in the face knowledge and understanding that increase even as you read this. Every day, individuals with autism show us that they can overcome, compensate for and otherwise manage many of autism’s most challenging characteristics. Equipping those around our children with simple understanding of autism’s basic elements has a tremendous impact on their ability to journey towards productive, independent adulthood. Autism is a complex disorder but for purposes of this article, we can distill its myriad characteristics into four fundamental areas: sensory processing challenges, speech/language delays and impairments, the elusive social interaction skills and whole child/self-esteem issues. And though these four elements may be common to many children, keep front-of-mind the fact that autism is a spectrum disorder: no two (or ten or twenty) children with autism will be completely alike. Every child will be at a different point on the spectrum. And, just as importantly, every parent, teacher and caregiver will be at a different point on the spectrum. Child or adult, each will have a unique set of needs. Here are ten things every child with autism wishes you knew: 1. I am a child. My autism is part of who I am, not all of who I am. Are you just one thing, or are you a person with thoughts, feelings, preferences, ideas, talents, and dreams? Are you fat (overweight), myopic (wear glasses) or klutzy (uncoordinated)? Those may be things that I see first when I meet you, but you’re more than just that, aren’t you? As an adult, you have control over how you define yourself. If you want to single out one characteristic, you can make that known. As a child, I am still unfolding. Neither you nor I yet know what I may be capable of. If you think of me as just one thing, you run the danger of setting up an expectation that may be too low. And if I get a sense that you don’t think I “can do it,” my natural response will be, why try? 2. My senses are out of sync. This means that ordinary sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touches that you may not even notice can be downright painful for me. My environment often feels hostile. I may appear withdrawn or belligerent or mean to you, but I’m just trying to defend myself. Here’s why a simple trip to the grocery store may be agonizing for me. My hearing may be hyperacute. Dozens of people jabber at once. The loudspeaker booms today’s special. Music blares from the sound system. Registers beep and cough, a coffee grinder chugs. The meat cutter screeches, babies wail, carts creak, the fluorescent lighting hums. My brain can’t filter all the input and I’m in overload! My sense of smell may be highly sensitive. The fish at the meat counter isn’t quite fresh, the guy standing next to us hasn’t showered today, the deli is handing out sausage samples, the baby in line ahead of us has a poopy diaper, they’re mopping up pickles on aisle three with ammonia. I feel like throwing up. And there’s so much hitting my eyes! The fluorescent light is not only too bright, it flickers. The space seems to be moving; the pulsating light bounces off everything and distorts what I am seeing. There are too many items for me to be able to focus (my brain may compensate with tunnel vision), swirling fans on the ceiling, so many bodies in constant motion. All this affects how I feel just standing there, and now I can’t even tell where my body is in space. 3. Distinguish between won’t (I choose not to) and can’t (I am not able to). It isn’t that I don’t listen to instructions. It’s that I can’t understand you. When you call to me from across the room, I hear “*&^%$#@, Jordan. #$%^*&^%$&*.” Instead, come over to me, get my attention, and speak in 3 plain words: “Jordan, put your book in your desk. It’s time to go to lunch.” This tells me what you want me to do and what is going to happen next. Now it’s much easier for me to comply. 4. I’m a concrete thinker. I interpret language literally. You confuse me by saying, “Hold your horses, cowboy!” when what you mean is, “Stop running.” Don’t tell me something is “a piece of cake” when there’s no dessert in sight and what you mean is, “This will be easy for you to do.” When you say, “It’s pouring cats and dogs,” I see pets coming out of a pitcher. Tell me, “It’s raining hard.” Idioms, puns, nuances, inferences, metaphors, allusions, and sarcasm are lost on me. 5. Listen to all the ways I’m trying to communicate. It’s hard for me to tell you what I need when I don’t have a way to describe my feelings. I may be hungry, frustrated, frightened, or confused but right now I can’t find those words. Be alert for body language, withdrawal, agitation or other signs that tell you something is wrong. They’re there. Or, you may hear me compensate for not having all the words I need by sounding like a little professor or movie star, rattling off words or whole scripts well beyond my developmental age. I’ve memorized these messages from the world around me because I know I am expected to speak when spoken to. They may come from books, television, or the speech of other people. Grown-ups call it echolalia. I may not understand the context or the terminology I’m using. I just know that it gets me off the hook for coming up with a reply. 6. Picture this! I’m visually oriented. Show me how to do something rather than just telling me. And be prepared to show me many times. Lots of patient practice helps me learn. Visual supports help me move through my day. They relieve me of the stress of having to remember what comes next, make for smooth transition between activities, and help me manage my time and meet your expectations. I need to see something to learn it, because spoken words are like steam to me; they evaporate in an instant, before I have a chance to make sense of them. I don’t have instant-processing skills. Instructions and information presented to me visually can stay in front of me for as long as I need, and will be just the same when I come back to them later. Without this, I live the constant frustration of knowing that I’m missing big blocks of information and expectations, and am helpless to do anything about it. 7. Focus and build on what I can do rather than what I can’t do. Like any person, I can’t learn in an environment where I’m constantly made to feel that I’m not good enough and that I need fixing. I avoid trying anything new when I’m sure all I’ll get is criticism, no matter how “constructive” you think you’re being. Look for my strengths and you will find them. There is more than one right way to do most things. 8. Help me with social interactions. It may look like I don’t want to play with the other kids on the playground, but it may be that I simply do not know how to start a conversation or join their play. Teach me how to play with others. Encourage other children to invite me to play along. I might be delighted to be included. I do best in structured play activities that have a clear beginning and end. I don’t know how to read facial expressions, body language, or the emotions of others. Coach me. If I laugh when Emily falls off the slide, it’s not that I think it’s funny. It’s that I don’t know what to say. Talk to me about Emily’s feelings and teach me to ask, “Are you okay?” 9. Identify what triggers my meltdowns. Meltdowns and blow-ups are more horrid for me than they are for you. They occur because one or more of my senses has gone into overload, or because I’ve been pushed past the limit of my social abilities. If you can figure out why my meltdowns occur, they can be prevented. Keep a log noting times, settings, people, and activities. A pattern may emerge. Remember that everything I do is a form of communication. It tells you, when my words cannot, how I’m reacting to what is happening around me. My behavior may have a physical cause. Food allergies and sensitivities sleep problems and gastrointestinal problems can all affect my behavior. Look for signs, because I may not be able to tell you about these things. 10. Love me unconditionally. 4 Throw away thoughts like, “If you would just—” and “Why can’t you—?” You didn’t fulfill every expectation your parents had for you and you wouldn’t like being constantly reminded of it. I didn’t choose to have autism. Remember that it’s happening to me, not you. Without your support, my chances of growing up to be successful and independent are slim. With your support and guidance, the possibilities are broader than you might think. Three words we both need to live by: Patience. Patience. Patience. View my autism as a different ability rather than a disability. Look past what you may see as limitations and see my strengths. I may not be good at eye contact or conversation, but have you noticed that I don’t lie, cheat at games, or pass judgment on other people? I rely on you. All that I might become won’t happen without you as my foundation. Be my advocate, be my guide, love me for who I am, and we’ll see how far I can go. from the book Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew, 2nd edition Bronze Medal in Psychology, ForeWord Book of the Year Awards Reprinted in its entirety with permission of author © 2012 Ellen Notbohm Contact the author for permission to reproduce in any way, including posting on the Internet. Award-winning author and mother of sons with ADHD and autism, Ellen Notbohm’s books and articles have informed and delighted millions in more than twenty languages. Her work has won a Silver Medal in the Independent Publishers Book Awards, a ForeWord Book of Year Bronze medal, Honorable Mention and two finalist designations, two Mom’s Choice Gold Awards, Learning magazine's Teacher's Choice Award, two iParenting Media awards, and an Eric Hoffer Book Award finalist designation. She is a contributor to numerous publications, classrooms, conferences and websites worldwide. To contact Ellen or explore her work, please visit www.ellennotbohm.com. 5 Training Opportunity Interested in working with children? Register now for “Responsible Adult in Child Care Settings” Date: Thursdays, April 23 – May 21 and one Saturday, May 23, 2015. Time: 6:30 – 9:00 pm (Thursdays) plus 9:30 am – 3:00 pm (Saturday May 23) Location: CCRR Sechelt office, 5520 Trail Avenue Cost: *$100.00 (includes workbook) To Register call: 604-885-5657 or email [email protected] This 20-hour course prepares participants for the following employment possibilities: * School Age Group Child Care (licensed) * Occasional Child Care (licensed) * As a replacement or a substitute/casual on call for Early Childhood Education Assistants (licensed group child care centres or preschools) * This course also meets the training requirements for non ECE Child-minders. * Other employment possibilities may include casual family drop-in programs, family child care or other related positions. * This is a non-credit course (cannot be applied towards the completion of a degree). *Bursaries are available for Licensed Family Child Care providers, Registered-Licence-Required Child Care providers or anyone in the process of becoming licensed or registered. The Association for Community Education in BC Presents: The Heart of the Matter April 9 & 10, 2015 Chatelech Secondary School, Sechelt, BC A conference for community school coordinators, teachers, administrators, parents, community partners, non-profits and everyone interested in working together for kids and communities. Here’s an example of the great workshops offered at this wonderful event: * Emotional Freedom Techniques: Tapping with Children * The Powers of Empathy * The Role of Social-Emotional Learning in Building Community * Promoting Children’s and Participation Through Value-based Play Here’s a link to more information: http://www.sd46.bc.ca/files/Community%20Info/ACEbc2015_Heart.pdf 6 Off Coast Professional Development ECEBC is very pleased to present its 44th annual conference, “Strengthening Connections Through Our Cultures and Practices” from April 30 to May 2, 2015 at the Radisson Hotel Vancouver Airport in Richmond, BC. Please join us for this opportunity for professional development and networking. ONLINE REGISTRATION – STARTS EARLY FEBRUARY 2015 The 2015 ECEBC Conference brochure will be mailed to members with the Winter 2015 issue of The Early Childhood Educator in mid-February 2015. The conference brochure is available for download from our website at www.ecebc.ca. The BC Family Child Care Association presents: Explorations Early Learning Conference and AGM Promoting Play - Defending Childhood - Empowering Caregivers Featuring Jeff A. Johnson Saturday, June 13 – Victoria, BC More info: http://www.bcfcca.ca/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/Conference-2015-flyer.pdf Job Opportunity Esprit Daycare is looking for a certified Early Childhood Educator to join our team. The person must have an assistant or basic certification. Extended medical benefits are an option. Please call Helen at 604-886-7739 or drop in for more information. The CCRR has purchased a bunch of great new items for our lending library. Come in and see! Here’s a few examples: - Paint and clay rockers and stamps - Fraction action board - Airplane and luggage carrier set - Stacking construction vehicles - Cup and ball play set - Sushi set New Resources! 7 Storytelling – A Building Block of Literacy By Catherine Bunce A few years ago when I was working in a family resource program, four year old Rowan and her mother arrived early one morning while I was setting up. Rowan bounced into the room and asked, “Do you wanna hear the story of how I was born”? So the three of us sat around a table while Rowan carefully recited the events of her birth, occasionally looking to her mother for prompts. I could tell that this was an important family story, one that they had told numerous times. Right from babyhood children love a good story, whether it’s a personal narrative, oral history, a story created through imagination, or from an illustrated book. Every time we read to children, tell a story, or recount events with them, we are helping them develop the early literacy building blocks that serve as a foundation for learning to read. In fact, story-based activities have an enormous influence on both cognitive and social/emotional development. They help children build vocabulary, use language creatively, develop strategies for problem-solving and provide a safe way to work through emotions. There are many ways to use stories to support early literacy skill development; for example, writing down children’s stories as they talk helps them learn that print has meaning, and that real life experiences can be recorded and preserved. To take it a step further, children can illustrate their stories. Research has shown that drawing is a precursor to learning to write. While reading to children is invaluable, sharing the same story multiple ways takes it to the next level. In early childhood settings, educators often use puppets, felt stories, and other props to retell stories and engage the children as active participants. The use of physical props provides a visual that helps children internalize story themes and meanings that they can carry over to their play. For example, after reading Jan Brett’s “The Mitten” and reenacting it with a felt story, a group of preschool children incorporated it into their dramatic play using a blanket as the mitten. Together they assigned roles, and acted out the story, adding to it and reshaping it to meet their own goals. Through translating the story into dramatic play the children were able to make connections between their experiences and the written word. Story props don’t need to be elaborate or expensive. They just need to be fun! Items from around the home or child care centre make great props. For example, for the story of The Three Bears, all you need are some bowls, chairs, and blankets or mats for the beds. Other simple props can include found and recycled objects, items from nature, craft supplies, old wooden puzzle pieces, photos cut from old books or magazines and laminated. A cookie sheet painted with a backdrop makes a great magnetic board. The CCRR has recently acquired several new felt stories and stories with props for our lending library. Check us out for some great ideas. And give us a call - a CCRR consultant would be delighted to visit your program and share a story. 8 The Myth of the Perfect Parent Remember the days of “B.K.” (i.e. Before Kids)?! You may have closely watched your friends and relatives parenting the recent additions to their families. How exciting – and maybe a bit strange as well – to witness them in this new role of Mom or Dad! Analyzing their developing strategies and techniques, you may have found yourself inwardly forming judgments that led you to determine to “do it just like she did” or to “never treat my child like that.” Some of you developed lists, on paper or in your minds, of numerous do’s and don’ts that you planned to follow once your own precious bundles arrived. One of my absolutes was to never let my children eat something that had fallen on the floor. How unhealthy, I thought. Why would a parent ever do that? Needless to say, I very quickly let go of that rule! I, like so many of you, had been the perfect parent before I had kids. Future moms and dads create images of what is “right” when it comes to parenting. Single mom Heidi wants to raise her kids just like her parents did because she has such great memories of her childhood. Yet her children are so different from her and her siblings. Wendy felt crushed by her parents’ high standards. Husband Bob thought his parents were far too permissive. Together they have decided that a middle of the road style will be right for their kids. But their oldest son continues to break the rules. Each is struggling to discern whether his or her parenting is “good enough.” There are No Perfect Parents There are no easy answers or fixes just as there are no perfect parents. Yet you may often feel the pressure to be like those other parents who seem to “have it all altogether.” TV commercials show smiling, welldressed, close-knit families who make it look so easy. Magazine articles and some parenting books describe what seem like sensible solutions to your recurring problems. For example, just put your child in time out for five minutes and she’ll behave better next time. If only it were that easy. Or perhaps yes, she’ll act responsibly for a brief time, but then the negative behavior reappears. What do you do? At the mall or in the grocery store, you see parents whose children hold hands, walk right beside their parents, stay next to them in the checkout line, and even cooperate when asked to help out. Where did these kids come from?! Comparing yourself to others can lead to discouragement. Usually you are basing your conclusions on only a small piece of the whole picture. No matter how “good” you think someone else may be at this demanding job of parenting, everyone will make mistakes along the way and disappoint themselves with their lack of information or poor judgment. Sometimes you are harder on yourself than is healthy or helpful. So where does that leave you? Learn to Be a “Good Enough” Parent You will need to address the “good enough” question for yourself. Standards are important for any job, including parenting. Research shows that people who are thoughtful about their parenting decisions are more likely to raise emotionally healthy children than those who “fly by the seat of their pants.” But you also need to be realistic and kind to yourself. Here are some suggestions to consider in assessing your own standards. Protect yourself from unsolicited advice. Relatives and friends who do not live with you can be quick to judge and let you know how you “should” parent your children. Respectfully set boundaries to let them know you appreciate their concern and will consider their suggestion. “Thanks for the idea. I can tell how much you care and are trying to help us.” Then change the subject. Don’t dwell on the past. Recognize mistakes, make amends if needed, then forgive 9 yourself. Berating yourself for using excessive limit-setting with your toddler and now not setting boundaries for him in his pre-teen years (to make up for your harshness ten years prior) will not help him to recognize the consequences of his current behavior. Do what your children need in the present rather than trying to undo what you think may have been mistakes years (or days) before. Seek out parenting support and information. Don’t underestimate the value of support. Sometimes just knowing that other parents are experiencing the same frustrations that you are can give you an emotional boost. Find better ways to respond if you feel uncertain about the patterns that have developed between you and your children. Since they keep growing and changing, you may want to look for new ideas if a skill that was helpful in the pre-school years is no longer effective. Openness to learning models a lifelong attitude for your children. Remember – it is never too late for you to grow and change. Congratulate yourself in those moments of wonder, connection, laughter, learning, cooperation, and signs of maturity. Give yourself credit for all that you do. My own son just asked me what I needed him to do before he could play a video game. WOW!! It is a moment for which I can take some credit after our discussion last evening about following through on tasks without the need for so many reminders. I am smiling as I write this! Attention, Parents! File your tax return– The B.C. Early Childhood Tax Benefit is coming The myth of the perfect parent may trigger anxiety about your parenting. Or it can challenge you to do the best you can and to stop beating yourself over the head trying to find the one right, perfect way. “Good enough parenting” means good enough for your child to feel secure, competent, and lovable, at least enough of the time. Remember that parenting, like any human effort, is a bit imperfect. I hope your own standards enable you to feel “good enough” in your ever-challenging role as a parent. Pam Nicholson, MSW, Certified Parenting Educator Reprinted with permission. Source: The Center for Parenting Education http://centerforparentingeducation.org Do you know an outstanding early childhood educator? Someone who has made a major difference in the lives of children in your community? Now is your chance to nominate them for a 2015 Prime Minister's Award for Excellence in Early Childhood Education! Recipients receive cash prizes of $5,000 (national level) or $1,000 (regional level), a certificate and a letter from the Prime Minister. National level recipients are invited to Ottawa to receive their award from the Prime Minister and to share best early learning and care practices with their fellow recipients. "The award meant so much to me, because I felt my children won." – Past recipient Visit www.pma.gc.ca to download your nomination package today! Nominations must be submitted by April 30, 2015. For more information, please contact the Prime Minister's Awards Office at 613-9914255 or [email protected]. 10 11 12
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