R ank & F ile Monday, May 2, 2005 George C. Marshall High School 7731 Leesburg Pike, Falls Church, VA 22043 Volume 42, Issue 10 What’s Inside? – R&F guide to prom: – Spring concert guide: Choir program sings its way to excellence in Myrtle Beach Dress code reinforced by administration by emilie raymer by erin paguio T 4 6-7 9 – Students graduating early: he three Marshall choirs enjoyed an overall successful trip to Myrtle Beach, SC, with the Chamber Singers placing first with an Excellent rating, the Concert Choir placing second with a Good rating and with Women’s Chorus in third place with an Excellent rating. “The trip was very successful,” choir teacher Mary Ann East said. “The students represented Marshall really well.” Marshall went without several members of the ChamJessica Chambers ber Singers on the trip. Members of the choir rehearse for their next concert. “We were just trying to do the best that we could,” juformance and the choir members were able to enjoy a lot of nior Eddie Seixas, who performs with the Chamber Singers, said. “We did well, [but] I believe we could’ve done better. I free time during the four-day trip. “It was a lot of fun because this year we had a lot more believe if we had everyone there, we could’ve ranked higher.” “There’s always room for improvement,” chamber singer free time than we usually do,” senior Katie Bynaker, who is a junior Ashley Coatsworth said. “It was nice to have that time to member of the Women’s Chorus, said. “Ms. East usually plans be able to perform and learn what we needed to work on some a lot of stuff for us to do as a group, but this year it was kind of more. Our number one goal was to get a one, a Superior. But an laid back, like a vacation. You kind of got to do whatever you wanted.” Excellent is still excellent.” Concert Choir member junior Lamont Womack added that Like the Chamber Singers, the Concert Choir had to perhe enjoyed meeting “a lot of new people” from other schools. form with several people missing. Aside from the free time, the choirs went through a clinic “We had only two altos,” junior Emma Wise said, “[but] I guess I was happy that we did that well considering most during which one of the judges worked with them, post-perforof the people singing the music didn’t even know it until that mance. “All the judges said we needed to put more effort into the week. ‘Good’ is only two away from the highest, so there’s a downside. I thought we’d get higher than we did, [but] overall songs,” Wise said. “We have to focus on changing how we sing depending on the song. I think we’ll do better next year.” I’m proud of us.” With the aid of clinic in addition to the overall perforWomen’s Chorus member senior Amanda Tygrett put the mance, regular class and hard work, the choirs hope to outperplacements and ratings into perspective. “It’s more about the rating than first or second place,” form themselves next year. “I hope that we improve,” Coatsworth said. “Nobody wants Tygrett said, “because when it comes to the placement, you can get beat out by a point. We got third which is kind of to take a step back. If we just work hard next year, I think we’ll disappointing but, for the Excellent rating, I was pleased with be able to get Superiors.” “I think that there’s a lot of underclassmen who are strong it. An Excellent rating is good to get, as long as we get a singers and performers and Ms. East is a really good teacher,” medal.” The trip to Myrtle Beach involved a lot more than the per- Bynaker said. “I think we can only get better.” A s the weather becomes warmer, administrators and faculty are increasingly cracking down on dress code violations. At the last faculty meeting, teachers were asked to review the dress code and enforce it in their classrooms and in the hallways. “What we’re trying to get is a shared understanding of this thing the school board makes us do,” assistant principal Denny Berry said. “We’re trying not to disrupt the learning process through distracting clothing.” According to the Students Rights and Responsibilities handbook, students are not allowed to wear shirts displaying inappropriate images or words. Bandanas and hats are banned, and clothing that shows cleavage, underwear, or midriff is not allowed. Some students feel that the administration is purposely focusing on some students but not on others. Sophomore Rachel Brummett is frustrated that teachers comment on her clothes because, as a tall person, it is harder for her to find clothes that conform to the dress code. “Just because I have long legs doesn’t mean my shorts are any shorter,” Brummett said. Berry, however, says that the administrators try to be fair to all students when enforcing the dress code regulations. “It’s on a case-by-case basis,” Berry said. “We try very hard not to embarrass a student. “For example, if I see a girl wearing an inappropriate shirt, I’ll tell her first that I think it’s inappropriate, and then say, ‘Do you have shirt or sweater you can put on?’. That happens 95 percent of the time.” Healthier snacks promoted on campus School recognizes volunteers’ efforts by erin paguio and emilie raymer I n an effort to combat the increasing juvenile obesity rate, Marshall is participating in a county-wide effort to promote healthier diets. Stickers have been added to certain vending machine foods to point out healthier options, such as baked and low fat chips. “Vending machines contribute to increasing obesity in the United States,” health and physical education teacher Noel Klippenstein said. “High-fat and high-sugar foods tend to sell better.” Machines with product labels on the front, like Coca-Cola or Gatorade, give the school 50 percent of the money made from the machines. Last year, Marshall made $16,000 from vending machines, which “is minimal compared to what a lot of schools get,” Cher Grimes, the central kitchen manager said. “Westfield made a reported $40,000. The school uses the money to sponsor a lot of things. The money goes toward the athletic department and things like uniforms. It’s a good way for the school to make money without any real effort.” Klippenstein believes that having healthy students is more important than making profits from the machines. “Healthy kids anywhere, especially at Marshall, is more important than [teens] being unhappy with themselves,” Klippenstein said. Langley and Woodson High Schools are doing pilot studies with healthy vending machines to see how students react to them. They are offering foods such as yogurt, tuna fish, milk shakes with soy milk, fruit snacks and cereal bars. “The kids are responding very well to it; they really like it,” Langley food service manager Dicky James said. “The kids, when they come up, they’re very receptive to it.” At Woodson, however, the new vending machines haven’t been as well received. “The [healthy vending machines] aren’t selling quite as well as our other ones,” Woodson food service manager Susan Owens said. Grimes, however, believes that in high school, students should be able to make their own decisions about food. “I think that high school students can make their own decisions, but there should still be healthier options available,” Grimes said. “The stuff I’m putting in there vending machines, I don’t give to my kids at home.” Some students say that if there were healthier options in the vending machines at Marshall, they would buy them; however, other students feel that the current vending machines are sufficient. Junior Robin Escobar is frustrated with the lack of snack choices in the school. “In between classes you want to get something to eat, but all there is is chips,” Escobar said. “I’d rather have the healthy ones.” Jessica Chambers Principal Leslie Butz, standing, addresses school volunteers at an appreciation breakfast on Wednesday. Seated to Butz’s right are Samar Jouejati and Edward Mickolus. 2 Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 ?” ? PHOTO POLL “ What is the cheesiest way to ask someone to prom? “If you write on your chest: ‘Will you go to prom with me?’ while wearing a pink speedo.” – Chris Dawson, freshman “Running around the school in your underwear and yelling ‘Will you go to prom with me?’” – Craig Murphy, freshman “Have your mom call her mom.” – Deborah Buffington, geosystems teacher “Wassup girl, you wanna boogey with the pimp?” – Hasan Al-Shingieti, senior “Get on the announcements and sing a song asking someone to prom.” – Sravya Yeleswarapu, junior “Do you have a map because I got lost in your eyes.” – Shannon McVey, sophomore Compiled by Ramy Abdel-Nabi and Jessica Chambers Rank & File Op/Ed Sports on Op/Ed: NFL draft rundown by alexander aivazis L et’s take a look back at the 2005 NFL Draft, a draft that, although it didn’t include too many superstars, was deep. Here area couple of notable selections I’d like to comment on: QB Alex Smith, San Francisco 49er’s (first overall): After Matt Leinhart decided not to come out for the draft this year, it was clear that Smith and Cal QB Aaron Rodgers would battle it out to win the top spot in the draft. Smith won the 49er’s hearts in the end with his poise and overall demeanor. You can’t complain about this pick and obviously next year Leinhart will occupy this spot after he graduates from Southern Cal. RB Ronnie Brown, Miami Dolphins (second overall): Brown split carries with RB Carnell “Cadillac” Williams at Auburn last year. NFL scouts determined that because of his size Brown was the back better suited for the NFL. This pick provides Miami with an outstanding runner after their previous back, Ricky Williams, decided to retire from the NFL and give up millions of dollars to smoke ganja (which he’s admitted to) in a tent in the Australian Outback. WR Braylon Edwards, Cleveland Browns (third overall): This team is no good, so they needed anything they could get. Edwards was the player with the greatest overall skills and playmaking ability in the draft and he will greatly help a depleted receiving corps. Prediction: The Browns will trade Edwards in a few years not because he’s causes problems or is playing bad, just because he’ll want out because they suck. These next few picks are boring, so let’s skip them. Moving on to the seventh overall pick we have my main man: WR Troy Williamson, Minnesota Vikings (seventh overall): The South Carolina Gamecocks leading receiver last year, Williamson is a very fast man, to put it mildly. Some people will forever criticize the Vikings for taking Williamson ahead of WR Mike Williams, but I agree with the choice partly because I think Williamson has great upside – and also partly because South Carolina rocks. Moving on to the ninth overall pick, we have the Washington Redskins, a franchise that is so lost its not even funny anymore. Highest payroll in the NFL, they resurrect the supposed legendary Joe Gibbs from NASCAR and yet they having nothing to show for it. They’re a laughing stock. The laughing continued with Washington’s 9th overall pick on Saturday. CB Carlos Rogers, Washington Redskins (ninth overall): You’ve got to be kidding me: Gibbs, in a moment of brilliance, decides that drafting a corner is more important than taking an WR whose insane playmaking abilities are desperately needed for that pathetic offense. So hang on, Redskins fans, because the story’s going to be the same in Washington this year. We’ve got a great defense but we don’t know how to put the ball in the endzone! Joe continued his flash of brilliance by drafting Auburn QB Jason Campbell with the 25th overall pick. Nice pick, Joe, but I thought you guys already had a QB, Patty Ramsey. He was a first round pick, too, but I guess you guys have finally figured out he’s no good, so you took Campbell. That’s cute that the Redskins drafted two guys from Auburn in the hopes that two guys from the same team would “bond” well together. Good idea, Joe, except they play on different sides of the ball so it doesn’t mean anything. Joe, here’s an idea: if you’ve finally realized that Patty is horrible, maybe you should have drafted Rodgers ninth overall, who only fell to the 24th overall pick because none of the other teams needed quarterback’s, instead of Carlos and then drafted CB Marlin Jackson with your 25th overall pick. Or you could have drafted Virginia TE Heath Miller to replace the tight end you don’t have. Anyway, now that we’ve confirmed how absolutely horrible the Redskins are, I’m out. 7731 Leesburg Pike, Falls Church, VA 22043 Lauren Knight Sports Editor Alexander Aivazis Managing Editors Chris Brimsek Lauren Knight Features Editor Photo Editor Jessica Chambers Business Manager Stephanie Sanata Centerspread Editor Front Page Editor Chris Brimsek Entertainment Editors Editor-in-Chief Kevin Gold Op/Ed Editor Ramy Abdel-Nabi T he purpose of Rank & File is to serve as a public forum for students of George C. Marshall High School. The unsigned staff editorials reflect the opinions of the Editorial Board, which consists of two Managing Editors and the Editor-in-Chief. Columns are the opinions of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the newspaper as a whole. Letters to the editor are welcome and should be sent to room 228. Letters should be signed for author verification and names will only be withheld under News Editor Emilie Raymer Caitlin Baker Carianne King Drew Taylor special circumstances, pending the approval of the editors. Letters from individuals that do not attend the school will be published at the discretion of the Editorial Board. Rank & File does not accept letters that are libelous, obscene or disruptive to the learning process. Rank & File reserves the right to edit any letter for length or style, or to eliminate any inappropriate statements. Organizations that wish to advertise in Rank & File can call our office at (703) 7145657 or e-mail advertising@rankn-file.com. Rank & File is designed Staff Writers Samantha Houtz Ean Nelson Erin Paguio Sarah Proctor Kelly Ream Advisor Eston Melton R& F on Dell computers running Adobe InDesign CS and Adobe Photoshop CS. It is printed by Silver Communications. Rank & File has a circulation of 1,700. CORRECTIONS: In the 4/11 issue of Rank & File, Angela Asta and Angela Wu were misidentified as juniors. They are both sophomores. News NEWS STATESMAN BRIEFS Junior focus day held for college prep J unior focus day was held April 20 to prepare juniors for the college admission and selection process. Juniors selected three of the eight available information sessions to attend, with topics including essay writing, financial aid, military options, two-year college admissions, careers with the federal government and Fairfax County Public Schools apprenticeships. Additionally, juniors had the opportunity for discussion with a panel of current Marshall seniors and admission officers from Christopher Newport University, George Washington University, the University of Virginia, Radford University and Virginia Tech. – caitlin baker HOA classes take trip to Gettysburg O ver 70 of Marshall’s International Baccalaureate History of the Americas (HOA) students traveled to Gettysburg, PA, on April 19, to tour the battlefield and visit the park’s memorials. Encompassing nearly 6,000 acres, the Gettysburg National Military Park includes over 1,400 memorials and monuments documenting the Civil War battle. “Gettysburg is a key turning point in the war,” history teacher James Robinson said. “It’s hard for kids to visualize [the Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 battle] in class. The trip let [our students] walk where the soldiers walked; it’s as visual as you can get.” “While we got to see the big picture in class, visiting Gettysburg really helped us put everything together,” junior Sravya Yeleswarapu said. “The tour of the battlefield was informative; it’s a different experience learning history from the place where it happened.” The Gettysburg field trip has become a yearly tradition for Robinson and his HOA students. “The field trip in the spring is a nice reward for HOA kids,” Robinson said. “Every tour guide is different and they all have different stories to tell. You don’t get the same tour each time [you go].” – ramy abdel-nabi GSA Day of Silence raises awareness T hrough the efforts of the Gay-Straight Alliance Club (GSA), over 160 Marshall students participated in this year’s Day of Silence held on Thursday, April 13. According to its official website, the Day of Silence was created by the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education network and the United States Student Association as a “student-led day of action where those who support making anti-LGBT [Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender] bias unacceptable in schools take a day-long vow of silence to recognize and protest the discrimination and harassment – in effect, the silencing – experienced by LGBT students and their allies.” This year, over 450,000 students in approximently 4,000 middle and high schools nationwide and in Puerto Rico participated in the event. The Marshall GSA club acknowledged the Day by handing out rainbow stickers and ribbons and by providing those taking the vow of silence with small cards explaining their vow. Though it was only Marshall’s second year participating in the Day, club members feel that the student turnout have been better. “It was really unorganized,” club treasurer Audrey Ford said. “Communication was a problem. Things weren’t being put on the announcements early enough.” Despite this, club sponsor Debra Crerie remains optimistic. “I’m very happy with the [student] participation and the response by teachers and the administration,” Crerie said. “It does my heart good. Often students at this school live in an isolated world; any time you can put yourself in someone else’s position you’re making a civic statement.” – ramy abdel-nabi Projects place at Regional Science Fair O f the 13 Marshall student projects sent to the Regional Science Fair at Robinson High School April 1-3, three were place winners. Over 450 projects from 28 Fairfax County high schools entered the fair. Juniors Valerie Menke and Catherine Nguyen placed second in the field of botany with their project titled “Vitamin C in 3 citrus fruits.” Also in the field of botany, juniors Emilie Raymer and Varin Zimmerman placed second for their project titled, “Hydroponics Present: Magnesium Mystery.” (Emilie Raymer is a Rank & File features editor.) In addition, juniors Tenzin Choden and Howard O placed third in the medicine and health field for their project, “The effect of second hand smoke on Tenebrio Moltar.” “I’m very proud of those projects,” science department chair Mark Fredenburg said. “We had a good showing this year.” – chris brimsek Sadie Hawkins dance held by class of ’07 T he sophomore class will sponsor a Sadie Hawkins dance the evening of Friday, May 13, to raise money for their class. Girls invite boys to a Sadie Hawkins dance, rather than the traditional other way around. The dance will be held from 8 to 11 p.m. “This dance [is] to raise money for next year’s prom, which will be amazing,” sophomore class officer Dema AlKakhan said. The dance previously had been scheduled for last Friday but, due to low ticket sales, was moved to next weekend. “I saw that a lot of high schools were having Sadie Hawkins dances and I thought it would be fun if Marshall did one,” sophomore president Josh Lee said. – sarah proctor Paid Advertisements Picture Yourself at NOVA! Save big bucks by enrolling at NOVA for your first two years of college. Then transfer to the four-year institution of your choice. Apply online at www.nvcc.edu. Summer registration starts April 20. Classes start May 16 and June 27. Students Wanted! Northern Virginia Community College 703-323-3000 www.nvcc.edu 4 Features Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 RANK Students to graduate from high school early PROFILE F AND Jessica Chambers NOEL KLIPPENSTEIN by stephanie sanata N oel Klippenstein has been an athlete throughout her life. As an adult, she advocates both the importance of physical education through her teaching and teamwork through her coaching. Growing up on a small farm in Maysville, MO, Klippenstein quickly realized the importance of successful athletes. “It made me realize how small schools and small towns revolve around sports and how the community can feel effected by a successful sports team,” Klippenstein, who is also the physical education department chair, said. By her senior year, Klippenstein had lettered in five varsity sports: golf, basketball, track, volleyball and field hockey. She was the only tri-athlete in her school to pull off district championships in golf, basketball and track. “My sophomore year, we played in the state tournament [for basketball] and that experience gave me a really good view of how team chemistry can overcome obstacles because our team was talented, but we were defeating teams more talented than us due to team chemistry.” Playing in a state tournament herself gave Klippenstein an experience that she will not soon forget and hopes to bring to her basketball team at Marshall. “It gave me a love for the game that I still have today,” Klippenstein said. The girls basketball team’s 18-7 overall record this year underscores Klippenstein’s abilities as a coach. “She’s really dedicated to the program and cares a lot about the players,” senior Kristina Allbee said. Klippenstein also feels that being a teacher assists her in becoming a better coach. “Teaching helps coaching because teaching involved students of different personalities and with coaching I have a chance to weave each personality into a collective team,” she said. This is Klippenstein’s third year at Marshall. “When I used to teach at other schools, all the kids were the same and it wasn’t very diverse,” Klippenstein said. “When I came to Fairfax County, I was glad to see the diversity represented at Marshall.” Klippenstein attributes her success as a teacher and coach to a great faculty and energetic student body. “The PE department has been an amazing staff to work with and has moved PE forward to make it more modern and exciting for the students,” Klippenstein said. “Also, the student body at Marshall this year has a good sense of humor, takes risks and has made my job fun.” by kelly ream or most students, fitting a high school experience into four years is difficult enough. However, juniors Aniruddha Krishna and Lauren Fischer are finding ways to squeeze it into just three years. Krishna decided as a freshman last year that he wanted to graduate a year early from high school. He met with guidance counselor Tanya Shuford and International Baccalaureate coordinator Connie Wineland to make the arrangements necessary to meet the requirements for the standard and IB diplomas. “I wanted to get a head start on college,” Krishna said. In order to meet diploma requirements, Krishna takes both English 10 and government online. “[Krishna] seems to be handling it fine,” Shuford said. “He is taking it in stride and very humble.” Even with extra courses added to his regular class schedule, Krishna still has time for extracurricular activities. Outside of school, he is involved in clubs, plays lacrosse and is in a jazz band. Despite these activities and his heavy workload, Krishna is managing well. “I have a lot of free time,” Krishna said. Junior Lauren Fischer plans to take class at George Mason University next year as part of a high school guest matriculate program. She will take only the classes she needs to graduate and will receive high school and college credit. After hearing about this program from a friend, Fischer talked to her counselor and applied online. “I was bored with high school and ready to move on and meet knew people,” Fischer said. “I think I will have a better time in college.” After receiving the credits she needs next year, Fischer will apply to a college of her choice. Students choose to graduate in three years for a variety of reasons. Some are only in the United States for a limited time and want to complete their high school education prior to returning home. Others simply feel prepared for the load of college and are eager to get there. “Some students are emotionally ready to move on from the structure of high school,” Shuford said. Krishna does not believe graduating in three years affects his high school experience. Jessica Chambers Junior Aniruddha Krishna works on an IB Physics I project. He skipped a grade, and was a freshman last year, but is now a junior. “I still hang out with the same people I did last year, but I met some new friends this year, too. I don’t notice that much.” Fischer also is not concerned about missing out on the normal senior year. “People make senior year out to be a bigger deal than it is,” Fischer said. “I consider now, really, my senior year.” The minimum requirements for an advanced diploma are 24 credits. Most students take seven credits each year over four years. Those students who intend to graduate early must decide to do so early in their high school experience and plan ahead. “Don’t decide to do it on a whim,” Shuford said. “Have a plan and really good reasons for graduating early.” Graduating high school in three years is clearly not for everyone. “[Graduating early] is not something I encourage,” said Shuford. “It is possible only if you have the maturity level necessary and are focused on a goal.” “If you’re interested academically, it’s good,” Krishna said. “It only helps if you’re really trying to get ahead.” Students gain buisness experience at co-op by stephanie sanata F or senior Raj Kumar, Monday through Friday includes more than just schoolwork. Kumar is one of many students who participate in co-op, a schedule that allows him to receive school credit for a job. Students in co-op have decided to work for various reasons. “I knew I wanted to work throughout the year and I didn’t need many more credits, so my schedule was more flexible to allow me to work,” Kumar said. “It’s useful for school and getting into college,” senior Eric Goodnight said. In order to get school credit for co-op, students must be enrolled in a business or marketing class. “How I handle each situation has a lot to do with the business world, so it’s important to have a business background,” junior Brian Cheng said. About once a quarter, students in coop are assessed on their work ethic. “[My evaluator] looks for how well I handle certain situations and my knowledge, understanding and fluency when dealing with customers,” Cheng, who works at his family’s Thai food restaurant, said. “She also asks my employer how well I am doing.” The number of hours a student works determines the amount of school credit he or she receives. Students who work for 200 total hours receive one credit; students who work 400 total hours receive two credits. “It has helped me know how to work hard,” senior Ben Fletcher said. Some students who are involved in co- op get to leave school early to go work. “I decided to do co-op so that I would get to go home before sports and have time to myself before work,” said Fletcher, who has worked at Neilson’s Frozen Custard for two years. Most students feel they are able to manage their time between work and school efficiently; however, extra curricular activities can get in the way. “Having work and school isn’t very challenging but, when you throw in a sport, it gets tough,” Goodnight said. Participating in co-op has made some students feel more prepared for life after high school by allowing them to save money for college. “It helps me prepare for college because it makes you manage your time,” Goodnight said. “It’s taught me a lot about time management,” Kumar said. “Having a job, schoolwork and making time for friends has allowed me to set limits on what I can and cannot do and still give myself time to sleep at night.” Paid Advertisement Advertisements Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 �������������������� �������������������� ����������������� ����������������������������� ������������������� ������������������ ���������������������������� �������� ������������������������������������������������������ ����������������������������������������������������� ������������������������������������������������������ ���������������������������������������������������� ��������������� �������������������������������������������������� ���������������������������������������������������� �������������������������������������������������� ������������������������������������������������������� ���������������������������� ������������������������������������������������ ����������������������������������� ������������������������������������������������������� ���������������������������������������� �������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� ���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� ������������������������������������������� 5 6 Rank & File May 2, 2005 Capital Grille offers affordability, variety, comfortable atmosphere by alexander aivazis W hen it comes to an experience that will truly make your prom night memorable, there is no substitute for The Capital Grille. Located in the heart of Tysons Corner, The Capital Grille provides patrons with outstanding food and service, and an atmosphere well-suited for prom night. The English boardroom atmosphere hits patrons as they enter the door. As you are led to your table, you are greeted by cases filled with steaks being aged to perfection – it’s just a hint of what is to come. The dining area walls are covered with wonderful paintings depicting famous naval battles and historic figures from Western nations, providing a nice contrast that brightens the rather dark dining room. There is no need to worry about service at this restaurant, as the servers here naturally carry themselves in the professional manner deserving of such a highcaliber dining experience. The cuisine is obviously the main draw to this steakhouse, and the steaks are exquisite. Start off your meal with a cup or bowl of split pea soup. Don’t worry – this isn’t some horrible thing your grandmother used to shove down your throat. This is what soup is supposed to taste like: thick and rich with flavor. For those not wanting to get too filled up before the big night, “the wedge” is the order of the day. Iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, chunks of blue cheese and smoked bacon adorn this appetizer or meal for those who like the soup and salad deal. Nonetheless, I would seriously encourage patrons to eat up. For someone looking for the best cut of meat, I recommend the filet mignon, which is the restaurant’s flagship cut. I would also suggest that patrons ask for their steak to be cooked medium, as aged steaks are naturally somewhat dry. The seafood here is no slouch, either, and I recommend the grilled swordfish jardiniere. It’s a swordfish steak cooked to such a degree of perfection, it actually melts in your mouth. The highlight of this entrée is that the swordfish is covered in a wonderful lemon butter sauce that eliminates any “fishiness” patrons might be worried about. Sides are of course a necessity and are ordered separately. A baked potato or an order of mashed potatoes would be wonderfully suited for a steak. The creamed spinach is also a nice choice for someone looking to get their greens in into this meal. Beware though: these sides are not truly designed for one person. I would go with one side for two or three people, depending on how much you feel you can consume. Wait – where are you running off to? You’re missing the best part of the whole meal: dessert! Remember to save room for dessert because this is the best part. If you’re a cheesecake man like me, you’ve come to the right place because I have never had a finer cheesecake than this. “Garnished” with fresh strawberries and an outstanding strawberry sauce, this is the signature dessert on a menu that lists winner after winner. For someone looking for something lighter, an order of fresh berries in vanilla cream is a good choice. A more filling desert would be the classic crème brulee, a wonderful custard desert covered with a caramelized sugar crust. The whole meal is a great value, as well. Entrees can usually be found in the $25 to $30 range and sides and desserts are about $5 to $10 apiece. Although I eat here a few times a year, I’ve never attempted dancing afterward, so I can’t give you any advice on dealing with that. I will, however, tell you that if you’re looking for the complete dining experience, The Capital Grille is the place to dine. Selection of prom night limousines, party buses a priority for students F & R P PROMGuide rom is next month, and while finding a date is what’s on everyone’s mind, most girls know the truth: it’s not who you’re with, it’s what you wear. Tysons I and II, Fair Oaks, Georgetown and other popular shopping spots in the area will soon be more crowded than Christmas, with all the teenage girls looking for the perfect dress (and guys looking for the perfect tux, of course). So if you need a head-start on this year’s trends, as well as where to find them (and for what price), you’ve come to the right place. Girls Metallic- for the truly trendy, this satin style can be found almost anywhere right now. pair with metallic jewelery and shoes. neimanmarcus.com $- Rampage (rampage.com), Hechts (hechts.com) $$- Nordstrom (nordstrom.com), Lord & Taylor (lordandtaylor.com), Jessica McClintock (jessicamcclinktock. com) $$$- Neiman Marcus (neimanmarcus. com), Betsey Johnson (betseyjohnson.com), Cache (cache.com) kind of dress is made for the girly-girl, and is also readily available. Wear it with your pearls. A om lie.c lora Looking to stand out from the crowd? Prints are perfect for a wild child. If you opt for a print, it’s best to keep your shoes and accessories neutral. nordstrom.com www.lasvegas.travelnice.com The interior of a party bus can hold between 20 and 40 people, and features include sound systems, TVs and refrigerators. While limos remain popular, party buses and hummerzines are booking up fast, despite their steep costs. Rates for both vehicles range from about $85 per person for a simple hummerzine or party bus, to about $185 per person for the large 40-person party bus model. Many companies, however, offer special prom packages which give a discount to large student groups during the spring prom season. W ith prom just around the corner, there are a few things you guys need to keep in mind while out with your date. First, you want to make sure you don’t smell like you just came back from milking a bunch of goats. Second, you want to make sure you look nice, which is a simple task to complete as long as you don’t show up wearing your favorite jockstrap. Third, don’t bring your mother. But what could be most important is that you take your date to a nice restaurant, and the Palm, located in Tysons Corner next to the Ritz Carlton, is as nice as you can get. The Palm is known for being an old fashioned steak house, fully equipped with the finest cuts and all the fixings. The Tysons area was once dominated in the steak house industry by another popular chain, Morton’s, but since the Palm opened in the area in November 1999, it has quickly grown to be the place to be among Northern Virginia’s finest. The prices are a bit steep for the average high school senior because, while at the Palm, you aren’t just paying for the food: you’re paying for the whole experience. One of the Palm’s most notable attractions is the hundreds of caricatures of celebrities, both local faces and people you’ve never even heard of, drawn all over the walls. Next to caricatures could be an old newspaper or magazine article about the original Palm in New York City or a cartoon that dates as far back as the 1920s. The Palm has the usual steaks and chops that you’d find at most steakhouses such as filet mignons, New York strips, rib-eyes and prime ribs, but something that you can’t find anywhere else is their very own “Steak A La Stone.” This signature dish is a piece of steak that was cut up and cooked to your liking laying over a bed of red and yellow peppers. If meat doesn’t tickle your fancy, you could always order another signature dish, a three-pound lobster straight from Nova Scotia. If you are pressed between meat and lobster, get both, as the surf and turf can be shared between two people. Dinner at the Palm is the perfect addition to the perfect prom experience. BELOW: The caricatures that adorn the walls of The Palm Restaurant depict both local and national celebrities, as well as restaurant regulars. The tradition of drawing caricatures on the walls began at the first Palm restaurant in New York City in the 1920s, where cartoonists from the nearby newspaper would draw a caricature in exchange for a free meal. kind of dress will make you feel like Cinderella. Jessica McClintock has many modern variations of this style. Tiara optional. Prints- Are you After Hours Formalwear (afterhoursprom. com, Tysons I), Savvi Formalwear (Tysons II), and Masters Tuxedo (masterstuxedo. com) have tuxedos available to rent or purchase. Prices to rent start at $50. by kevin gold Princess- A classic style, this neimanmarcus.com Where to Shop Unique decor, original entrees make The Palm worth the expensive prices Price Guide: $ = under $100 $$ = $100-250 $$$ = $250 and up Ombre- This by sammi houtz s most upperclassmen can tell you, half the fun of prom lies in the details. From fancy dinners to expensive dresses, big money is being spent to make every minute of the night count. So, with shows such as MTV’s “Pimp My Ride” on the rise, it’s no surprise that lavish vehicles for the evening are in high demand. Escort limo and luxury vehicle rental businesses throughout the area are in gear to offer even more models for this season’s prom. New versions of the classic stretch limo, such as the “hummerzine” and “party bus,” are now available for rent. “Sophomore year, our ride to prom was definitely a highlight,” senior Miranda Jones said. “We rode around in a hummerzine for a while, and then came kind of late to the dance so everyone saw us get out of this really cool looking limo. It cost a lot of money for my date but was definitely worth it since everyone around town thought we were celebrities or something.” Party buses tend to run even bigger than hummerzines, holding anywhere between 20 to 40 people. These private coaches combine entertainment and transportation to provide a memorable experience before the actual dance even begins. The interior of these decked out charter buses usually include leather couches, tables and even a bar loaded with soft drinks. Depending on the specific model, other amenities include flat-screen TVs, DVD and surround sound systems, mirrored ceilings and fiber optic lighting. Some of the most unique party buses also have disco balls, strobe lights, fish tanks, karaoke systems and smoke machines. “The party bus we went on was awesome because it had a better dance atmosphere than our actual prom did with the cool light effects and music,” said James Madison High School senior Missy Bell. Where to Shop Centerspread 7 Guys Ruffles- A nordstrom.com very feminine style, ruffles are available in a variety of long and short dresses. Classic- The tradi- tional black tux is for guys who want to look put together on prom night. Non-Traditional- afterhoursprom.com a white Tux is perfect for you if your a guy who likes to stand out in a crowd . masterstuxedo.com www.lernerenterprises.com Despite slow service, McCormick & Schmick provides pleasant experience by sammi houtz H idden in the bottom of an office building right in Tysons Corner, McCormick and Schmick’s seafood restaurant is a great escape for fine dining – if you’re willing to spend big bucks. McCormick & Schmick’s offers a sophisticated, cozy ambiance that is unique to the hectic, corporate environment it exists in. From the moment you step out of your car, the welcoming atmosphere is apparent, with complimentary valet parking and a polite hostess greeting you immediately. Visitors then have the option of dining outside on the restaurants patio or indoors at one of the many tables or private booths. The private booths are especially popular as a small curtain closes these small rooms, allowing a party to dine in comfort and privacy. While the atmosphere of the building is close to perfection, the service is quite a different story. It takes approximately two hours to dine there, considering the long wait for drinks and meals. The waiters and waitresses always seem to be in a rush, leading to mistakes in delivering orders and checks. Fortunately, though, the restaurant wasn’t hesitant in clearing certain items from the check in order to please customers. McCormick & Schmick’s menu boasts a wide range of seafood, steak, pasta and other specialties with prices for practically any budget. Known best for its delicious seafood, each platter’s description contains the geographic location it was obtained from, such as the Halibut from Achorage, Alaska, or the White Snapper from Ka Lae, Hawaii. The restaurant is proud to guarantee that all the fish arrive fresh daily, and offers a variety of different cooking styles to fit each customer. While most meals at McCormick & Schmick’s are excellent, the price of each meal seems to reflect its level of satisfaction. The seafood cobb salad, priced at $14.95, is a rather disappointing meal, as it contains a huge pile of greens, with a tiny helping of shellfish piled on it. Another inexpensive meal, the homestyle meatloaf, at $7.95, is nothing to brag about, as it tastes just about the same as an entrée from the frozen food section of the supermarket. The more expensive items on the menu seem to be the most delicious and are worth the extra bucks. The Mako Shark with King Crab costs about $18.95 and provides a generous grilled helping of this exotic fish and sauce that is unique to McCormick & Schmick’s. The lobster is the highest-priced item on the menu at $29.90. The sweet lobster is accompanied by mashed potatoes and corn-on-the-cob, creating a huge meal that provides enough for leftovers. The huge dessert tray at the entrance of the restaurant is definitely hard to ignore. Anyone with a sweet tooth will particularly love their berry cobbler and rich chocolate cake, which are both big enough to share. Ultimately, McCormick & Schmick’s is an excellent place to dine, especially for prom or other special event, if you are willing to spend a lot of time and money for a scrumptious meal. 8 Entertainment Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 What’s Spinning? Garbage’s Bleed Like Me not enough bly avoiding the Beautiful Garbage material. The concert, from start to finish, was highly enjoyable and I left the his is a review about two things: an amazing concert club feeling excited for having been there. and a mediocre album. After the shame of 2001’s And there is surely something to say about that exciteBeautiful Garbage sent Garbage to the drawing board, ment, that sense of energy which infected everyone who Shirley Manson and her trio of brilliant producers are back was there. Much of it had to do with the fact that Garbage on the scene – both literally and figuratively. With a sold- is a great live band, but I think that the hype around their out crowd at The 930 Club hanging on every moment of “comeback” was a greater factor. Manson, in her cheery their astounding performance, it seemed like Garbage is dialogue with the audience between songs, reminded us of on the upswing, ready to recover after the flop in 2001. her love of The 930 Club, telling us that it was because of But, after hearing the newest release, Bleed Like Me, I sold-out shows like ours that allowed her to think positivethink it’s pretty much safe to say that Garbage, no matter ly about the release of Bleed Like Me. Surely this would how excited they were to be performing a sold-out show, mean new success. has not made much progress with the new album. There’s a problem with that, though, because the honThe concert at 930 was mostly amazing because it est truth is that Bleed Like Me, the correction to the miswas theatrical. It began with a dark stage as Johnny Cash’s take made on the overly-electronic and canned Beautiful eerie version of “Hurt” played, allowing the silhouetted Garbage, is . . . not that good. While Garbage seems to band members to sneak onstage. As Manson strutted on have forgotten the metallic beatbox effects that populated in her red high heels and stretchy black dress the concert the last album and returned to their grungier sound, it still began, launching into “Queer,” the sly hit from the first doesn’t seem as if they’ve reclaimed the distinctive edge album. During the concert they used that made them so great on Garbage and four television screens to display imVersion 2.0. ages to go with each song and also Bleed Like Me just makes me think made use of great lighting, which ofthat they’ve run out of ideas. They do this ten lit up the audience, a bright ball to themselves with the songs that sound of energy all its own. like all the other songs on the album, or The concert ended with the are so repetitive and unchanging that the staging of an arrest, a scene that was option of depth, musically or lyrically, is acted so superbly that it evoked connearly impossible. On Bleed Like Me it fusion in the crowd, who wasn’t sure is as if they have chosen one sound, that if it was real. After coming back for grungy synth-guitar, and have let it permean encore, Garbage ended with the ate each song, making a nearly homogeGarbage’s comeback paired their politicized “Sex is Not the Enemy,” neous album. new release, Bleed Like Me, with a allowing Manson to pull down the Garbage has never been known for national tour. neck of her dress to expose a skinManson’s lyrics, but on this album, they colored bra as the song concluded. seem especially bad. This may be because This is when the “police” came on, arresting Manson and a weak musical support makes them stand out more, but escorting her offstage, followed by the other enraged band I think they’ve just hit another low. Each song has one members. While definitely a farce, this act even inspired key line repeated over and over, from “Why do you love audience members to chant “Bullshit! Bullshit!” at the me?” to “Why don’t you come over?” which contribute to lone policeman who remained on stage. that sameness but mostly have the sorry job of making the But, the best actress award surely goes to Manson, songs a little nerve-grating. The songs on this album are whose performance was confident, sexual, and elaborate. practically weightless, and it’s just utterly disappointing. So capable of hooking an audience and magnetizing their But, perhaps there are a few okay songs, my favorites eyes to her, seeing her onstage is sheer proof of why she being “Bleed Like Me” and “It’s All Over but the Crying,” has become a cultural (sex) icon. She took the songs and which are slower, melodic and more varied than the oththe lyrics at full strength, acting them out as she pranced ers. My favorites aside, however, it seems that if this alaround the open stage, kicking the air or splaying herself bum does have anything going for it, it’s a shiny pop qualon the floor. She also charmed the audience by chatting ity that might earn it some radio play and dollars, if not between songs with the flares of her Scottish accent, even critical success. It’s true that many of the songs, though calling a stagehand to bring her “whiskey to get frisky.” nerve-grating for some, are probably pretty catchy and The sound of the concert was great, if a bit overdone upbeat. But, for fans of Garbage from the good ol’ days, with effects. Manson’s mic made her voice sound entirely when they still had that badass edge and a knack for brilunnatural, but for the most part Garbage’s fancy studio liantly produced grunge-techno hybrids, Bleed Like Me production transferred well to live instruments. They might keep us waiting for a real comeback – one which is played music from a good range of albums, though nota- seeming a lot less likely to arrive. Rating: 5.1 by carianne king T “Lifehouse’s new album and Akon.” – Dana Whitman and Catherine Morgner, freshmen www.mattimus.com “‘Wait’ by the Ying Yang Twins.” – Maya Al-Shingieti, sophomore “Tupac’s Better Days.” – Viggo Gunio, senior “Kate Bush’s Whole Story.” – Judy Greenblum, faculty Compiled by The Crew What We’re Spinning Melinda and Melinda doubles quality by carianne king M Carianne’s Picks: The Dresden Dolls – The Dresden Dolls Garbage – Garbage Drew’s Picks: Talking Heads – 77 Glenn Braca – The Ascension Ratings Key 10.0 – Essential 9.5-9.9 – Brilliant 9.0-9.4 – Exceptional 8.9-8.0 – Excellent 7.5-7.9 – Good; Above average 7.0-7.4 – Decent 6.0-6.9 – Fair 5.0-5.9 – Mediocre 4.0-4.9 – Poor 3.0-3.9 – Awful 0.1-2.9 – Terrible 0.0 – Completely horrendous elinda and Melinda, Woody Allen’s latest film, revolves around an interesting idea: the tight bond that both contrasts and connects drama and comedy. The movie begins with a heated discussion between two film directors about whether the nature of life is comedic or tragic. Given a test scenario – a strange woman interrupting an intimate dinner party – one director chooses to develop the story as a tragedy, the other as a comedy. By allowing us to observe the in-between of it all, Allen has created a smart, insightful and engaging film. It becomes our task to weigh the differences or, perhaps more poignantly, to notice the underlying similarities in the two versions of life. Radha Mitchell plays Melinda, the woman who walks into the dinner party, in both versions and is the only actor to play a role in each story. Both Melindas have essentially the same background: they’ve both escaped a tumultuous relationship and have come to rely on their friends to help get back on track. In the comedy version, this allows Melinda to enter the lives of Susan (Amanda Peet) and Hobie (Will Ferrell), a couple whose passionless relationship is forced apart by Melinda. The tragic Melinda is a little more complex and her storyline focuses more on her downfall as a hopeless romantic as she becomes involved in her friends’ entangled love lives. Both stories feature a similar conflict between betrayal and starry-eyed romance, as the characters seem to switch lovers as if they were musical chairs – somebody gets left out, and so somebody gets hurt. But whether the heartbreak becomes an attribute or a downfall is left to our frame directors, who arrive at very different endings for similar plotlines. This is what is most fascinating about Melinda and Melinda: the skillful way in which Allen weaves the two stories together and the fun of placing the duality into a larger picture. The movie’s shortfall, however, may be in the inability of the drama to keep up with the comedy, whose script and loveable characters seem to surge ahead of the torn, broken messes depicted in the tragedy. With Will Ferrell doing a terrific job as the neurotic Woody Allen prototype (he’s the best character in the film) and maintaining that jovial, charming attitude of the comedy, it seems that the more dramatic elements pale in comparison, as they are left to appear as overkill. But, resolving to like one over the other is not doing the film justice, for the film is largely enjoyable because of the connected, fraternal duality of the storylines that allows us to analyze and appreciate each as two fully-developed and fully-entertaining interpretations. Rating: 7.9 www.movies.yahoo.com “112’s Pleasure and Pain.” – Nadia Ahmed and Nafisa Hagi Abukar, juniors Entertainment Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 www.images-jp.amazon.com Why Yo La Tengo get a ten-point-O by drew taylor sesses the true gift of never, ever he O.C. is doing everything in its power to ruin in- sounding derivadie rock forever. I’m not sure how they’ve managed tive or hackneyed. to place gems from Sufjan Stevens and Spoon alongside The married duo bland crapfests from the likes of Matt Pond PA, Jet and of Ira Kaplan and The Dandy Warhols. The show’s producers are stopping Georgia Hubley at nothing to commercialize the most historically anti- (with the addition of bassist/occommercial pop genre in history. Nothing is sacred anymore. Indie rock has now be- casional singer come a melodramatic parody of its former glorious self, James McNew in with people (both real and fictional) such as Zach “Gar- 1992) assimilate den State” Braff and Seth (the Death Cab kid) from The their numerous O.C. aiding in this unfortunate bastardization and sellout influences into a surprisingly cohesive, artistic, creative and original enof some of the best music of the past 15 years. Thankfully, neither Zach nor Seth can contain or har- tity. Even though the style and tone of Prisoners of Love ness the pure unadulterated genius of the American indie bands of the early ’90s such as Pavement, Dinosaur Jr. can change on less than a dime, there is a common thread that runs through every single song on this compilation: and, of course, Yo La Tengo. genius. There isn’t a single song on It’s thankfully unlikely that Prisoners of Love that I wouldn’t lisyou’ll never hear the noise-drone ten to a hundred times in a row. Evof tracks like “From a Motel 6” ery single song on this 26-track comor the down-tempo sorrow of pilation is excellent. I don’t mean “Little Eyes” underscoring a kiss that some of the songs are “okay” between two emaciated, spoiled and others are “brilliant;” I mean that same-sex 20-something-yearthey’re all brilliant. And that’s a rare, olds who still curiously seem to almost unheard-of batting average be in their teens. for any band, even for a greatest hits In many ways, Yo La Tengo compilation. are the ultimate, consummate inAnd, now, to prove my point, die rock band. While Pavement I’m going to set my CD player on and Dinosaur Jr. were undoubtshuffle and tell you about the track it edly nothing short of brilliant, randomly selects: Stephen Malkmus and Co. most“Sugarcube” could rightly be ly stuck to writing impossibly called one of the best songs Yo La catchy and unbelievably witty Tengo ever recorded: (but as I said pop songs, while J Mascis, Lou above, so could any of these songs) and Murph spent most of their ca- Yo La Tengo enjoying sun and clamdiggers it incorporates a wall of impossibly reer perfecting their wrenching, visceral pop-noise freakouts. Yo La Tengo, however, have distorted (yet, miraculously, still tuneful) guitars atop of demonstrated such a stunning breadth of styles that when chugging, energetic drums and Ira Kaplan’s relaxed, pitchlistening to Prisoners of Love: A Smattering of Scintil- perfect vocals cement this song as an indie rock classic. If I had more space and more time, I would talk about lating Senescent Songs: 1985-2003, their recent two-disc “greatest hits” compilation, I found myself shocked that all 26 songs of Prisoners of Love. Unfortunately, I can’t. We have to save room for the possible Mariah Carey all these songs could be by the same two people. The sequencing of this compilation is clearly meant review. But, take it from me that this compilation is a to draw attention to the vast difference of styles that Yo “must-own” for anyone who has the tiniest bit of interest La Tengo have pursued over their nearly 20-year career. in music at all. In fact, it should be required listening of As the noisy, Teenage-Fanclub-esque power-pop of “Tom anyone with a soul. All the miserable, rich white kids from The O.C. can Courtenay” fades out with distorted guitar squalls, the clean, folky chords of the Byrds-esque folk-rock number keep The Killers, The Bravery and Death Cab for Cutie. “Lewis” cut through the memory of the previous track I don’t need them at all. I have Yo La Tengo. And Seth, Marissa, Ryan, Sandy, and Summer will never be able to like a cup of coffee to a nasty hangover. While their styles may be varied and their influences take that from me. Rating: 10.0 broader than any other band recording, Yo La Tengo poswww.highroadtouring.com www.matadorrecords.com T Local concerts promise fun, Kenny G by ean nelson T his summer’s festivals are sure to suit everyone’s tastes in music. There are plenty of shows to attend this spring and summer that will keep your thirst for live music quenched. All the regular concerts are back, including Van’s Warped tour, which always has a large turnout due to the lineup of popular “punk”-rock bands. The bands that are scheduled for this year’s tour are significantly different from last year’s, due to the rule that bands cannot play two years in a row. However, the genre is still the same and a few of the more popular bands include My Chemical Romance, Atreyu (popular but talentless), Matchbook Romance (who were there last year and played a good show) and Senses Fail. DC101’s annual chili cookoff held will be held on May 17 on Pennsylvania Avenue in the District. The disappointing lineup of bands for this year is Three Doors Down, Third Eye Blind and Saliva. This concert is always filled with has-been mainstream bands that take anything they can get. But, hey, if you’re into that kind of music, you know where they’re playing. HFStival is surprisingly back, even though the radio station has been replaced with “El Zol.” Last year’s concert had a good turnout, even with the genre-clashing decision to put Jay-Z as headliner. Well, you know what they say: music brings people together. This year’s lineup includes bands such as Interpol, The Bravery, Coldplay and Unwritten Law. Unfortunately, there are some not-sogreat bands playing too, such as Jimmy’s Chicken Shack. If you don’t have a problem heading over to Tennessee, Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival will be on June 10-12. This concert is more for the indie music fans, although some more mainstream popular bands are playing too. Modest Mouse, The Mars Volta and Jack Johnson are going to be there, too, if you want to hear something more familiar. Bonnaroo serves as a great way for small bands to get ahead. If you’re bored and have the time this summer, go check it out. For those of you who have your parents’ taste in music, the annual Capital Jazz Fest is playing June 3-5 in Columbia, MD. I’m sure three or four or maybe even 10 of Marshall’s students or faculty enjoy jazz music, and if you’re one of those people then you won’t want to miss this year’s concert because the king of soft jazz is going to be there. Yes, Kenny G. I can just taste your excitement. Mmm . . . Kenny G. Besides the king, a few others will perform in the three-day concert as well, including Chaka Kahn, Boney James and George Bunsen. WMZQ country music fest is going to be at the Nissan Pavilion. The tickets are pricey , ranging from $40 to $250. But, if you want to see your favorite country stars jig-up, hoe-down and roll-out, then I’m sure you can buy the ticket no problem. Phil Vassar, Lonestar and The Charlie Daniels Band are just a few of the bands playing at this year’s festival. The concert will be on May 7. 9 The Smiths The Queen is Dead by drew taylor I (Sire; 1985) don’t understand how teenagers can go through the most painful stage of their lives without The Smiths providing the soundtrack for every awkward kiss, painful breakup or existential fit of angst. There’s no way any of today’s emo bands who (supposedly) worship The Smiths could ever measure up to the pure adolescent pathos and catharsis of those four blokes from Manchester. Morrissey (the singer) is the teenager we all wish we could be. He always knows exactly what to say to those infuriating kids who seem to be more popular than we are (“If you’re so funny / then why are you on your own tonight? . . . And if you’re so very good looking / then why do you sleep alone tonight?”) and when you listen to him deliver these painfully, brilliantly biting lines, it’s all too easy to see yourself as Morrissey, standing up to the popular kid with the popped collar through the sheer force of your intellect and wit. Unfortunately, as most of us have figured out during the joyous years of high school, things don’t usually work out that way. But that’s exactly why there are few experiences quite so delightful and emotionally fulfilling as immersing yourself in The Smiths’ ultimate masterpiece, The Queen is Dead. For 35 stunning minutes, you can be as indulgently dramatic and depressed as you choose to be. Morrissey is so ridiculously good at encapsulating the entire adolescent experience into four-minute pop songs, it boggles the mind. Everyone has moments where they listen to a song and think, “This must have been written just for me,” but when you listen to The Queen is Dead, the feeling is more like “This entire album must have been written just for me!” Morrissey has an undeniable gift for communicating abstract emotional ideas through intensely personal and emotional lyrics. He’s one-half Oscar Wilde, one-half Ray Davies, and one-half Noel Coward; and, yes, that adds up to three halves. His absurdly large personality is just too big to be contained in two. This is a man who has said, “If George Michael had to live my life for five minutes, he’d strangle himself with the nearest piece of cord,” and “If I were knocked down tomorrow by a passing train, I would be considered the most important artist ever in the history of English pop music . . . that’s just a rough guess.” While some of these unbelievably quotably quotations are completely correct, at least from my point of view (“I think I must be, absolutely, a total sex object. In every sense of the word. A lot of men and a lot of women find me unmistakably attractive.”), most of them are delivered with a heaping dose of irony. Either that, or he’s the world’s biggest jerk. But there’s more to The Smiths’ genius than Morrissey’s gloriously sardonic, silver-tongued, hyper-literate overacting. There’s also Johnny Marr, guitarist extraordinaie While Marr’s name might not be as instantly recognizable as Steven Patrick’s, his musical contribution to The Smiths and The Queen is Dead was just as great; a little less noticeable, perhaps, but equally as stirring and dramatic. There’s no guitarist in the world that sounds like Johnny Marr. Many have tried and, to my knowledge, all have failed. He managed to conjure up an entire pop symphony with a few guitar tracks. He never uses distortion as a means to lend power to his compositions; he doesn’t have to. He layers on a little delay and reverb and he lets his inimitable guitar tracks speak for themselves. Marr is untouchable. Add Andy Rourke’s funk-trained bass and Mike Joyce’s furious drumming to Marr’s jaw-dropping guitars, and you’ve got the most impressive pop band of the ’80s. Add Morrissey’s damaged croon to the mix, and you have something eternal and infinite. The Smiths are a light that never goes out. Paid Advertisement Sports 11 Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 Baseball in slump Girls lax defeat rivals, team plays strong by kevin gold T he Lady Statesmen lacrosse team, in the midst of what could be considered an up-and-down season, pulled out an impressive, had a come-frombehind win against the Madison Warhawks at last Monday night’s “senior night” game. In game, the Lady Statesmen were down by one goal late in the second half, when a rally led by senior Caryl Spoden sparked the Marshall offense to tie the game up. In the final two minutes, the Lady Statesmen ran the clock down while holding for the last shot. With seconds left, the Lady Statesmen took a hard shot attempt, but the shot was saved. However, the Lady Statesmen controlled the rebound and it was senior Kim Wheeler who plowed through a wall of defenders to score the game-winning goal against the Warhawks. The Lady Statesmen also had strong offensive play from senior Colleen Gallagher, junior Shaney Jessica Chambers Soderquist and sophomore Lauren Byrne. Junior midfielder Shaney Soderquist chases down a Madison attacker. The “I’ve never scored a game-winning goal before,” Lady Statesmen beat the Warhawks, 11-10, this past monday. Wheeler said. “It was an absolute amazing way to “I would say they fit the descriptions of a perfect coach. end the rest of the games at home.” They’re really understanding. They’re really fun and we “It was definitely exciting for us: it was senior night, all have respect for them. They get us pumped.” they’re our cross-town rivals, we all have a lot of friends “We’ve definitely been more successful than in the on the team,” senior Maddy Thom said. past,” Thom explained. “We really responded to the new “It was the second year we beat them and that was coaching staff, therefore we’re more willing to win than huge,” senior Kelly Stroud said. “It was our senior night before. and it was especially good because they wanted to beat us With two more district games left before the disafter [we] beat them on their senior night last year.” trict tournament starts, the team has to face Fairfax and Tina Plaugher, in her first year as head coach, has led McLean, both of which Stroud calls “huge games that are the team to a 5-3 record (3-2 in the district) this season. completely winnable.” Plaugher and the rest of the coaching staff have received With the district tournament starting May 11, look for great praise from their players. the Lady Statesmen to work their way to getting as close to “I absolutely love our new coaches,” Wheeler said. the championship as possible. Paid Advertisement Jessica Chambers The Marshall boys baseball team has continued to struggle, losing six games in a row in district play, falling to 1-8 in the district. Losses to Woodson, 6-0, Langley, 4-3, Madison, 11-4, McLean,11-0, Lee, 6-3 and South Lakes, 5-2, have plunged the Statesmen into last place in the district. 12 Rank & File Monday, May 2, 2005 Around the Grounds Demirbas places number one at regional lifting meet by alexander aivazis J unior Murat Demirbas went to the Northern Region weight lifting competition with low expectations. He came out with two titles and, more importantly, is now ranked number one in the region. In his first year of competition, Demirbas captured first place in bench press (250 pounds) and dead lifting (425 pounds). “I was out of shape and didn’t think I would win anything,” Demirbas said. Demirbas had never been to a Northern Region power meet before because last year he had wrestled during the winter and had been unable to compete. As a result, heading into this year’s contest, Demirbas had no idea of what the competition would be like. In the end, it didn’t matter, as Demirbas achieved a total combine of 980 pounds, although he didn’t win the squat competition (305 pounds). Demirbas’ accomplishment resulted in him moving into the number one spot in the region, which came as a big surprise to him. “I couldn’t believe that I ranked number one in the region after the meet. I checked the board and I was shocked,” Demirbas said. Demirbas now has high expectations for next year’s meet. “I’m going to work as hard as I can this summer and during the fall,” Demirbas said. “My goal is to win the region and then move on again and compete in states.” Coach J.T. Biddison’s only comment on Demirbas’ accomplishment was the following quote from Hall of Fame NFL Head Coach Vince Lombardi: “The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.” Boys Soccer T he Statesmen boys soccer team has been unable to pull of a victory this year, falling to 0-6 on the year after losing to Woodson 5-1 on April 21 and to Washington-Lee on Wednesday, 2-0. The loss has set the Statesmen up for a season that could potentially end without a win as the team will now have to do battle against three fierce district opponents The team has matchups against Langley Friday, at Madison on May 3 and home against McLean on May 10. Boys Lacrosse Jessica Chambers Demirbas exemplifies proper technique with a set of dumbells. Demirbas placed first at the Northern Region in the bench press and dead lift competiontion levels. A fter winning two district games in a row, the Marshall Statesmen boys lacrosse team looked to be on a roll, but back-to-back poundings from Sports Woodson on April 18, 14-1, and Langley on April 27, 183, have plunged the Statesmen below .500 with a 4-5 record. Victories against Lee, 5-4, and South Lakes, 9-3, seemed to have put the Statesmen on the right track after a terrible 12-3 loss to Fairfax on April 6. But, a lack of defense or offense in the team’s last two games have left the Statesmen limping into their final two games of the year against Madison on May 1 and McLean on May 6. The only bright spot for the team during the last few weeks has been the outstanding play of freshman midfielder Aaron Hemon. The score of the Madison game on April 1 was unavailable at the time of press deadlines. The team’s game on May 6 will be the team’s senior night and a game where the Statesmen hope to gain some momentum heading into the district tournament. The game will also have a significant impact on the team’s seeding for the tournament. Madden, apple picking, oat bags: words from the wise by kevin gold V olume XV: The other day while I was scurrying about, a jolly ole chap asked me if I do any extra activities for school. I told him that I work for the school newspaper, Rank & File. He asked me if I write stories, and I told him I did. He asked me what I write about, and I told him I write “The Gold Standard.” The man had a confused look on his mug, the same look when you find gum on the bottom of your shoe. Actually, that’s more of a disgusted look, but nonetheless, he was confused. As I explained to the fellow that the Standard is a sports column, I thought to myself, “Is ‘The Gold Standard’ just a sports column?” What is a sports column, anyways? “Nothing more than one’s opinion on a certain subject relating to the world of sports,” I would assume, is the easiest and most clear way of explaining what it is. But, since its creation, the Standard has been almost a way of life. In fact, it has been a religion in some aspects. I think that in the International Religion League, if you look at last month’s standings, the religion known as Standardism ranks in at 45, just in front of the Raelians but just behind the Scientologists. I’d say being ranked number 45 isn’t bad at all, seeing that we’ve only been established for the last year or so. I have many followers as well, or as I like to call them: my “Goldamaniacs.” There are many distinguished professional athletes that are “Goldamaniacs,” but why should I sit here and waste your time and mine with useless names that will truly not add any substance to this weeks sermon, I mean volume, at all? As I continue to explain the extreme depth that “The Gold Standard” holds, I begin to think of the one question that every religion is based on: “Why?” Well, actually it may be two if you include “How?”, but let’s just focus on the “why.” In sports, so many events occur, but we often are left to wonder, Why do they occur? If you want to know, just take this pill – I mean, just read “The Gold Standard.” Test me. Go ahead, ask me anything. Why did former NFL kicker Al Del Greco stay in the league so long? This is an easy one. It’s because he wanted to always be the worst possible kicker to have in Madden. Have you ever tried to kick a 35-yarder with this goof in Madden ’02? There are four possible outcomes: he kicks it wide left, he kicks it wide right, he kicks it just short, or it gets blocked. It doesn’t go in. It never has, and it never will. Ever. At all. Next question! Why does Shawn Bradley even play in the NBA? This one I’m not sure I can answer. His worth to the game of basketball is equivalent to a cardboard cutout’s. He should be on a farm somewhere picking the apples out of trees that nobody else could reach. He should be a part of the XMen. Isn’t there something out there in this world that we could stick this guy in and he can excel at? Next! Why has everyone and their mother been accused of using steroids? Last time I checked, my mom was not accused of using steroids, but I’ve came up with this new game. What you do is you guess the next athlete to be accused of using steroids. My guess: that son of a mare Seattle Slew. Yeah, I saw him shooting up right before he got his oat bag. Man, when you drop the names of Al Del Greco, Shawn Bradley and Seattle Slew in a volume, you know it’s going to be a classic. Come back next time when I’ll explain the process of being “standardized.” It’s kind of like a bah mitzvah. Contact a Rank & File staff member if you would like to perform at Rank & Festival.
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