PERINATAL PRESS
A PUBLICATION OF THE PENNSYLVANIA PERINATAL PARTNERSHIP
www.PaPerinatal.org • www.DepressionStealsTheRealYou.org
MOM IS
SO SAD
DESPERATE PLEA TO
AND NO ONE
DAD-TO-BE
EXCLUSIVE! SEE PAGE 5
“I’m not crazy.
I need help!”
UNDERSTANDS
I ALREADY FEEL LIKE A
BAD
MOM
‘What’s going to happen
when the baby comes?’
FIND OUT NOW!
INSIDE SCOOP ON PAGE 7!
Page 9
‘BUNDLE OF JOY’
A MYTH FOR NEW MOM
PAGE
11
If you or someone you know is pregnant or a new mother, this
booklet is for you.
It is about a common condition called perinatal depression that
affects 1 in 7 women* during pregnancy or up to one year after
childbirth. Perinatal depression is more than the “baby blues.” It
doesn’t go away on its own within a couple of weeks.
Perinatal depression changes the way a woman thinks, feels and
behaves. It can make her seem so different that the people who know
and love her barely recognize the person she has become. Some
women try very hard to hide their feelings and pretend everything
is okay.
Happily, with proper care and treatment, women who have perinatal
depression can soon start feeling like themselves again. Sadly, too
few women get the help they need. That’s why the Pennsylvania
Perinatal Partnership created this booklet.
We want to raise awareness about perinatal depression so more
women get the help they need and deserve.
For more information about perinatal depression and where
to get help, call the Pennsylvania Healthy Baby Helpline:
1-800-986-BABY (2229)
For nationwide 24-hour help, or in a crisis, call:
1-800-PPD-MOMS (773-6667)
If you are interested in adapting this information for your state,
email [email protected].
PLEASE NOTE: The information in this booklet is not a substitute for
personal medical advice, attention, diagnosis or treatment. If you
have questions or concerns about your health or the health of your
baby, consult your health care professional.
*Source: Postpartum Support International, www.postpartum.net
This booklet is a publication of the
Pennsylvania Perinatal Partnership
with funding from the
Pennsylvania Department of Health
and the Pennsylvania Department of Public Welfare.
Creative services provided by Hollister Creative.
2
DEPRESSION
STEALS THE
REAL YOU
Stop, thief!
Gripping stories, startling facts, raw human emotion — that is the
stuff of tabloid headlines. We can’t help but read them because they
speak to our fascinations and our fears.
Most of the time we are relieved that we don’t know the people
involved. But sometimes there’s a connection. We know someone
in a similar situation. Or maybe that someone is you.
This booklet borrows from tabloid style to grab your attention with
stories, facts and emotions related to perinatal depression. It’s a
common condition affecting women during and after pregnancy.
And it can be treated successfully if the woman gets help.
You don’t know the people involved in the stories that follow. But
you may know someone in a similar situation. And that someone may
be you.
If you sense a connection, you can stop a thief. That thief is
depression, a condition that steals something more precious than
any possession — it steals the thoughts, feelings and behaviors
that make you you.
To stop this thief, call the PA Healthy Baby Helpline at 800-986BABY. It’s free, it’s confidential, and it will connect you with a trained
professional who can diagnose and treat perinatal depression.
Don’t let depression steal the real you. Get help, and start feeling
like yourself again.
3
Is depression stealing you?
Mark the box beside any statement
that describes how you have been
feeling and acting during the past
week or two:
I feel sad or hopeless
most of the time
I don’t laugh at things
like I used to
I don’t enjoy doing
things I used to enjoy
I am more anxious and
worried than usual
I feel scared or panicky
but I don’t know why
I can’t concentrate or
make decisions
I am quick to blame myself
when things go wrong
It is hard to get to sleep
and stay asleep
I don’t have the energy to
do what I should be doing
I feel tired and just want
to sleep all day
I cry a lot because the
smallest things upset me
I have thoughts about hurting
myself or my baby
4
Did you check more than one box? If
so, you may have perinatal depression
and you should get help right away.
Contact your regular health care
provider or call the PA Healthy Baby
Helpline at 800-986-BABY (2229).
The Helpline also welcomes calls
from a family member, partner or
friend of the woman who seems
depressed. All information is free
and confidential.
Information is also available
online at www.PaPerinatal.org and
www.DepressionStealsTheRealYou.org.
For 24-hour help or in a crisis, call:
1-800-PPD-MOMS (773-6667).
MOM IS SO SAD
AND NO ONE UNDERSTANDS
“YOU SHOULD
BE HAPPY” HER
HUSBAND SAID
“In my head I kept hearing why, why, why:
Why do you feel so bad?”
There was an answer, but Shawna
didn’t want to hear it.
“Depressed? No, that’s not me. I wanted this
baby. I’ll be fine.”
Her husband said, “We have a beautiful baby.
You should be happy.” So how come she wasn’t?
“My mom said, ‘A baby is a huge adjustment.
You’ll come around.’ I wanted to believe her.”
Her dad said, “There’s nothing wrong with
you.” But something was definitely wrong.
Finally an aunt who had battled depression
recognized Shawna’s symptoms and urged her
to call the hotline.
The woman who answered assured Shawna
that she was not alone: 1 in 7 women feel profoundly unhappy for no obvious reason before
or after childbirth.
She gave her the number for a local doctor
who could help her.
Now that she feels like herself again, Shawna
hardly recognizes the helpless person she was.
“I just never thought it would end. It felt like an
eternal hell.”
Shawna listened to her aunt’s advice and got help. You can get help by calling 1-800-986-BABY (2229).
Why women don’t ask for help
Some women won’t seek help
for perinatal depression even though
they are suffering from many of the
symptoms (see list on page 4).
What really happens when you get
help is this: You start to feel better. You
start acting like the mother and partner
you always wanted to be.
They may be afraid to tell anyone
because they have fears like these:
• “People will think I am a bad mother”
• “My child(ren) will be taken away”
• “I will lose my partner”
• “I will be arrested or hospitalized”
The truth is that all these are much
more likely to happen if you DON’T ask
for help. Depression that is not treated
can get worse over time, making you
less able to care for yourself, your baby
and your family.
To find a person who is trained to
help you, contact your regular health
care provider or call the PA Healthy
Baby Helpline: 800-986-BABY (2229).
Some woman don’t tell because they
think feeling this way is normal when
you’re pregnant or have a newborn.
Or they think the feelings will go away
soon. Or they think sharing these feelings with others would bring shame
or embarrassment.
The Helpline also welcomes calls
from a family member, partner or friend
of the woman who seems depressed.
All information is free and confidential.
Information is also available
online at www.PaPerinatal.org and
www.DepressionStealsTheRealYou.org.
For 24-hour help or in a crisis, call:
1-800-PPD-MOMS (773-6667).
DESPERATE PLEA
“I’M NOT CRAZY.
I NEED HELP!”
“We can deal with this. We can handle it. That’s
what I thought.”
But Michael thought wrong.
“Kia was acting like a psycho and she wouldn’t
talk to me.”
This woman was his best friend. They did everything together. And suddenly it was all falling
apart.
“After awhile I just lost it. I told her I didn’t
want my kid to have a crazy person for a mom.
Then I felt bad.”
Kia got so upset. “I don’t know why I’m like
this,” she cried. “But I’m not crazy. I need help!”
“How could we handle it when we didn’t even
know what it was?”
Michael and Kia agreed to call the hotline. They
were referred to a local doctor, who told them
Kia was among the 1 in 7 women who feel
profoundly unhappy for no obvious reason
before or after childbirth.
It’s hard for the women, but also for their
partners, who can feel abused and confused
when a woman they love suddenly seems like
someone else.
The doctor helped Michael get the real Kia back.
Now they can’t wait to welcome their baby.
Kia reached out to her husband and they got help. You can get help by calling 1-800-986-BABY (2229).
Get help here!
Here are phone numbers and Web
sites where you can get free and
confidential information about perinatal
depression.
PA HEALTHY BABY HELPLINE
NATIONAL INSTITUTE
MENTAL HEALTH (NIMH)
OF
866-615-6464
www.MedEdPPD.org
800-986-BABY (2229)
POSTPARTUM
EDUCATION FOR PARENTS
PENNSYLVANIA
PERINATAL PARTNERSHIP
800-311-BABY (2229)
800-504-7081 (SPANISH)
www.sbpep.org
www.PaPerinatal.org
DEPRESSION STEALS
THE
REAL YOU
www.DepressionStealsTheReal You.org
POSTPARTUM SUPPORT
INTERNATIONAL (PSI)
800-944-4773
www.postpartum.net
DEPRESSION AFTER
DELIVERY, INC. (DAD, INC.)
www.DepressionAfterDelivery.com
Emergency!
If you or someone you know is in a
crisis or having thoughts of harming
themselves or someone else, get
immediate medical attention or call:
NATIONAL SUICIDE
PREVENTION LIFELINE
800-273-TALK (8255)
888-628-9454 (SPANISH)
NATIONAL HOPELINE
NETWORK
800-784-2433
PPD MOMS
800-PPD-MOMS (773-6667)
8
I ALREADY FEEL LIKE A
“WHAT’S GOING
TO HAPPEN WHEN
THE BABY COMES?”
“How can I not want a baby?”
Diannah asked herself that question
a hundred times a day.
“I didn't feel this way with my first son,
so it scared me. I thought I was being a bad
mom… like being abusive before the baby
even came out.”
Fear and shame kept her from telling anyone.
“I thought I was the only person who felt this
way. I was scared what would happen if I told.”
Diannah didn’t know that 1 in 7 women feel
profoundly unhappy for no obvious reason
before or after childbirth.
They may cry a lot, sleep too much, eat too
much or not enough, stress out, say mean
things or say nothing. But sometimes the
symptoms are less clear.
Diannah’s own mom knew her well enough
to sense that she was troubled and feeling
down.
When Diannah refused to talk about it, her
mom wrote down the hotline number and left
it on the counter for her.
“Somehow it was easier to talk to a stranger.
She really listened and then gave me a number
for a doctor who could help me.”
Diannah found the courage to call for help. You can get help too by calling 1-800-986-BABY (2229).
Books
BEYOND THE BLUES:
A GUIDE TO UNDERSTANDING
AND TREATING PRENATAL AND
POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION
DOWN CAME THE RAIN:
MY JOURNEY THROUGH
POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION
Brooke Shields, 2005
Shoshana S. Bennett
& Pec Indman, 2006
CONQUERING POSTPARTUM
DEPRESSION: A PROVEN PLAN
FOR RECOVERY
Ronald Rosenberg, James Windell,
Deborah Greening, 2004
POSTPARTUM HUSBAND:
PRACTICAL SOLUTIONS
FOR LIVING WITH
POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION
Karen Kleiman, 2000
SLEEPLESS DAYS:
ONE WOMAN’S JOURNEY
THROUGH POSTPARTUM
DEPRESSION
Susan Resnick, 2001
10
‘BUNDLE OF JOY’
A MYTH FOR NEW MOM
“I WAS JUST
TOO TIRED
TO CARE
ABOUT HER”
“I really thought I’d be happy, you know, bundle
of joy and all that. But after I brought my baby
home, I was just too tired to care about her or
anything else. I wanted to sleep — all the time.”
Jacqui is horrified at the memory.
“When my husband came home from work I
would still be in my pajamas. He would take the
baby and I would go lay in the bathtub and cry.”
When she wasn’t sad she was mad.
“If he brought me home the wrong chocolate
milk, I would scream and throw it at him.”
Jacqui was among the 1 in 7 women who feel
profoundly unhappy for no obvious reason
before or after childbirth.
They think and act in ways that upset them
and the people around them, yet they can’t
help themselves.
Lucky for Jacqui, a girlfriend became concerned when she stopped by at 3 p.m. and saw
the new mom in her PJs. She told Jacqui about
the hotline.
“They hooked me up with this really nice
doctor who knew exactly where I was coming
from.”
Jacqui got help when a friend told her about the hotline. Get help by calling 1-800-986-BABY (2229).
DEPRESSION STEALS THE REAL YOU.
Get help, and start feeling like yourself again.
Call the Pennsylvania hotline: 800-986-BABY