1. hobbies and interests
2. reading

How to Work the
Psychic Home Party Circuit
And
nd 8 Tips on Making
Making
The Most of Your
Readings
BY ALAN STRYDOM
1|Page
COPYRIGHT ©July 2008
All rights reserved. Reproduction or utilization of this work in any form, by any means now known or
hereinafter invented, including, but not limited to, xerography, photocopying and recording, and in any
information storage and retrieval system, is forbidden without written permission from the copyright
holder.
Disclaimer:
This ebook is specifically about how I work the psychic home party circuit, and what I do
in my readings. It’s about what works for me. Your mileage may differ.
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“When people consult me, it’s not that I’m reading the future; I am guessing the future. The future
belongs to God, and it is only he who reveals it, under extraordinary circumstances. How do I guess at
the future? Based on the omens of the present. The secret is here in the present. If you pay attention
to the present, what comes later will also be better. “
-Words by Paulo Coelho: The Alchemist
“Just because we use cheats doesn't mean we're not smart…”
-Lyrics by The Moldy Peaches: Anyone Else But You
3|Page
Contents
Introduction to Part 1
5
Part 1: How My Psychic House Parties Work
7
Advertising
7
Booking the Gig and Charging the Fees
8
The Evening‘s Proceedings
10
Party Option 1: The Palm Reading Party
11
Using the Charts
13
Party Option 2: Numerology & Pendulum Party
20
Moving the Pendulum
21
Setting up the Room & Examining the Tools of the Trade
23
Numerology Basics of Calculating the Birth Path Number
25
Part 2: Enhancing the Reading Experience
28
Building Rapport
28
Advanced Psychic Rapport
31
Rapport and Language to Entice/ Catch Phrases
34
Personal Hygiene
35
Counseling and Giving Advice
36
The Message in the Metaphor
40
The User-Friendly Healing Session
44
Wrapping It Up
46
Part 3: Invitations, Palm Posters (2 sets), and Pendulum Card for printing
47
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Introduction to Part 1
Since the release of my ebooks on Palmistry Quickies and The Simple ESP Card Reading System, and the
subsequent visits to my now old, public website, I have been asked several times how I routine a Psychic
House Party. Although there are far better authors than I who have already discussed the basics of
house parties and also how to market them, what follows is the format that I personally have used. It’s a
simple format, and it works. But before I get into my own house party routine, let’s take a look at some
of those inspiring authors and their relevant works:
From www.deceptionary.com
Richard Webster
-
Home Psychic Parties for Fun & Profit
Richard outlines his FULL program for house parties, including illustrations of business cards and
letters he sent out.
Richard Webster
-
Ladies Night
In Ladies Night Richard gives a complete system for getting bookings on the quiet nights of the
week, promoting your own Ladies Nights. The evenings are part lecture, part demonstration, and
are fun for the spectators — and easy for the performer to present. A complete sample evening is
included, word for word.
These are only two of the books on the subject of Psychic Home Parties from his site. If you want
my advice, visit www.deceptionary.com and see all the treasures from this prolific author and
entertainer.
From www.mental-list.com
Stuart Cumberland
-
Psychic Home Party Marketing Course
According to the advertisement on his website, Stuart gives you the complete ins and outs of
marketing Psychic Home Parties. I personally don’t have this particular course as my marketing
works for me, but if his “How to make $1000 a Month Profit” is anything to go by, I’m sure this
would be well worth it.
Stuart Cumberland
-
How to Give Fun & Amazing Psychic Readings Vol. 1 (DVD)
As it says on the tin, Stuart discusses giving fun and easy readings using Numerology.
Again, I’ve only mentioned two products from Stuart’s website, but see for yourself the other
great products he has to offer.
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From www.misdirections.com
Docc Hilford
-
The Cinderella Act (Video)
Docc’s video adaptation of his booklet titled The New Cinderella Act, in which he presents readings
for teenage girls at parties, using a system that he developed specially for that.
I won The Cinderella Act video off an eBay auction some time ago, and I still see copies popping up
now and again. I did a quick Google search for you, but only www.misdirections.com turned up
with a successful result for the video. I might be wrong but the video seems hard to find, so grab it
when you can off eBay. Several other dealers including www.hocus-pocus.com, www.hanklee.org,
www.penguinmagic.com, http://stevensmagic.com, www.worldmagicshop.co.uk, and Jheff’s
awesome Marketplace of The Mind (www.jheff.com/New_Cinderella_Act.html) stock the booklet.
Of course there are numerous other authors that have added their valuable insight and ideas to making
specifically Psychic House Parties successful – and still others that have shared routines and effects – but
it’s not within the scope of this ebook to go into all of them. (An honorary mention should be made
though of Robert Nelson, the man who is said to have started it all.)
It is only my intention here to outline the routine I use at a Psychic House Party, and what inspired me in
those decisions.
One of the questions I get asked most often by up-and-coming readers is “What effects do you do?”
The simple answer is I that I don’t do any effects. No PK effects, no mind reading effects, no predictions,
no swamis or peek wallets… Not a single one.
Well, ok, I lied. Just a little bit though so I’m sure you’ll forgive me.
If (with emphasis) I had to do an effect at a Psychic House Party, in front of a group of people, I would
definitely do Larry Becker and Lee Earle’s Palm Mystery. If you’re unfamiliar with this, the effect is one
of using a pseudo-palm reading in a pseudo-psychometry effect. It’s a great little purchase with the
perfect dressing – just don’t go overboard and end up offending anyone with the jokes included. It’s
purely entertainment, with the emphasis on how lines on palms can indicate things about us.
If I’m asked to demonstrate something other than what I have planned for the evening, the other effect
I do is the second phase of my Creating Impact routine, based on John Riggs’ They Hell Fire. I’m always
set to do this effect. I find this routine works extremely well in these scenarios if you take your time and
really build on the visualizations and feelings that accompany the routine.
And that’s it for effects! I don’t do anything more, and I recommend you don’t either. Just stick to the
reason for being there… it’s not to show off your psychic greatness and what you can do, it’s to show
your clients their own potential, answer their questions, and let them have fun.
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Part 1: How My Psychic House Parties Work
Advertising
I advertise in the local yellow pages and local weekly publication. I have also befriended two or three
coffee shop and bookshop owners and have placed business cards and flyers near the newspaper stand
in these shops. Because of the small market and area I live in, I prefer this personal approach.
I’m fortunate in that I live within 90 km (56 miles) of two other towns, where I also advertise in their
weekly publications. Unfortunately the furthest town away is a little more conservative, so I don’t get
much work there. Still, the adverts are cheap and I take my chances.
If I really wanted to I could even advertise in a major city that is 2 ½ hours drive away, but it’s a little far
to drive for an evening – as I only do these parties during the week – and have other commitments over
the weekend.
These adverts, and living in a small town where everyone gets to know you, provide enough advertising
for me.
Other places I could recommend for you to try are the bulletin boards at libraries and shopping malls,
and check your local newspaper for announcements of association gatherings and women’s meetings.
Call up the organizers and offer to give a free short demonstration or reading at their next meeting, and
be sure to have plenty of business cards with you. Just start somewhere and get the ball rolling. Just
make one phone call to begin with… you’ll be amazed at how momentum carries you once you start!
Palmistry Quickies is ideal for these quick reading events.
We have a local radio station that fires up every December, which is our summer holiday season. I have
been on this twice before. Being a small radio station they haven’t bothered too much with having
listeners calling in, so I’ve just given a reading to the presenter on the air, along with being interviewed.
And no, I have no idea how many people were listening in… but it didn’t cost me a cent to advertise
after I gave the reading. These presenters are always looking for interesting things to talk about, and
support the community as much as they can.
And finally, last year someone in town started a business supplying party hats and other accessories for
parties; and as a spin-off started putting entertainers on their booking list. They wanted to be able to
offer the service; so we have a kind-of agent’s fee agreement, where they receive a percentage of any
bookings I get through them. I’ve booked a few birthday parties for young teenage girls through them
since, and base them on an idea inspired by Docc Hilford and his Cinderella Act.
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Booking the Gig and Charging the Fees
One of the ways I make it easy to book my parties is by offering it for free to the hostess. Especially in
today’s economic climate, this is a great incentive to many people. Some clients prefer to pay my fee
upfront and simply invite their friends to the party at their expense; but most of the time they accept
the “free-party” system. For the teen birthday parties I charge a straight fee. You decide what you’re
more comfortable doing.
Although the hostess gets the party, and a private reading, for free, the onus is on her to invite ten of
her friends around, and they in turn each pay towards the evening’s entertainment.
For sake of convenience I’ll call this a $20 fee here. You can charge whatever you like, but the idea is to
keep the amount each person pays low enough, have about ten people at the party who you’ll end up
reading for, and be perceived as giving value for money. (The reasons why will become clear in a bit.)
(By the way, in our local South African market I was charging twice the amount of a cinema ticket as the
attendance fee. This is extremely cheap I know, but I’m going for the after-sell. In light of recent
petrol/gas increases I’ll be increasing this to three times the cost of a cinema ticket.)
So for the initial fees, let’s quickly do the math:
Ten people at $10
=
$100
Ten people at $20
=
$200
Basic math, right? I just wanted to make it clear that whatever amount you decide on, you will already
have a minimum amount of $100 for the party, and you haven’t even begun working yet.
Just remember, that if you decide on less people you may have to increase your fee. You decide.
One of the reasons I keep the fee so low for these parties is that the private one-on-one readings that
happen later will be fairly short readings, lasting ten minutes max. The reason for this is that there are
ten people waiting for me to have their reading, and whoever is last is going to wait a long time already.
The shorter the reading, the less they have to wait; and the more I am guaranteed to sell a longer
private reading in the near future to practically all those clients. This also helps to establish a solid
customer base of clients who see me regularly.
By the way, I don’t refer to these one-on-one readings as mini or short readings… I call them
“introductory readings”, implying that there is more to be read at another time.
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Another reason for the low fees is to make it an impulse buy. I want their buy-in to be impulsive and
almost a throw-away… I don’t want them to think this first encounter with me is too expensive. Again,
it’s this perceived value for money that I want them to associate me with. Remember, this isn’t a
corporate market, but a market consisting of mostly bored housewives and small birthday parties.
Now some performers I have mentioned the “hostess-no-pay” idea to have asked if the hostess is ever
embarrassed to ask her friends to pay their part. Well yes, it’s happened from time to time… and in
some cases the hostess pays my fee. In all the cases though, I tell them about the invites they can send
out to their friends – invites which will cover all the details of the party, including the reading fee.
These invites (found at the end of this ebook for your printing pleasure) take the heat off the hostess
and make it easier to ask for the fees. And as I’ve mentioned before, this gives a great incentive to
others to host their own parties, and inevitably I return to almost the same groups (including new
members) the next time around. Getting to know these ladies is part of all the fun!
So on confirmation of the booking, I email the hostess my performance and technical rider, and a copy
of the invite to send to her friends. I also ask her to handle the collection of the fees for me when her
guests arrive, and mention the products I will bring along in case anyone is interested.
Now let’s just talk about collecting the fees and selling the products:
•
Collecting the fees is made easier than you think by purchasing a book that you can use for
entering names and contact details in. I found an expensive looking registration book at my local
stationary shop that I use. The book is actually a handmade diary with a wooden cover, but it fits
the part perfectly. As the guests arrive they are asked to enter their name and contact details,
and place the attendance fee into an ornamental box I have placed next to the book. All the
hostess has to do is make sure they sign the registration book, and point out what the box is for.
•
I decided to have my back-of-room items on show while I give the one-on-one readings. It is for
this reason that I ask the hostess to take care of the sales for me. And because of this, I decided
to treat her like a business partner and offer her a percentage of any sales. As you will see, the
items are not that expensive to begin with, and so are subjected to a fairly healthy markup. Even
with this markup they are still inexpensive, guaranteeing more impulsive buying. The hostess
then either gets her share of the money as a thank-you for handling the sales, or gets the choice
of any item to the same or similar value. Because I am self-employed with no fixed monthly
income except that which I generate, I rely on multiple streams of income. This includes affiliate
marketing, which I advertise through my website, as well as informing my clients via email of
anything new and interesting. I don’t promote any old product, but rather concentrate on those
I use myself and believe in.
I usually call up the day before the party to make sure everything is on track, and to find out if she needs
my help with anything.
And with everything now ready, we wait for the evening of the party.
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The Evening‘s Proceedings
On the evening of the party I arrive about a half hour early to setup the private room or area I will be
using for the private readings, as well as setup my charts and back-of-room-sales items and anything
else I might need.
I leave the registration book and ornamental box on a table near the door for the hostess, and make
sure the chairs and couches are arranged in the best possible way so that everyone will be able to see
clearly.
When everyone is seated and ready, I begin with a short introduction and how I became involved in the
esoteric world. Unlike many mentalists that advocate telling a story about your great uncle Jim and the
powers or experiences he had – of which I could never do because I don’t have an uncle Jim and so
cannot tell that sort of lie – I tell the truth. I share my esoteric history with them and give them some
background on the things I’ve studied (which in reality is quite extensive).
After that I tell them what they can expect from the evening, and then proceed with a quick question
and answer session.
And no, this is not a famous mentalism effect by the same name – and I am not channeling my great
uncle Jim either – this is a real question and answer session wherein I attempt to answer any questions
anyone in the group might have regarding previous paranormal or psychic experiences. Basically the
girls get to chat a little and share some of their experiences. This allows me to gauge where each person
is in their personal understandings, shows me any potential troublemakers, and basically passes some
time. (Yes, sometimes there is a troublemaker in the group… a Mr. or Mrs. Know-It-All that is at best
avoided, or brought over to the dark side… err… your side.)
Regarding the answering of those questions: If you don’t know the answer to something, then feed the
question back to the group… i.e. shift the responsibility. I simply smile and say “Well, what do you guys
think?” Don’t try and BS anyone or make anything up. They will feel your discomfort and insincerity. If
you truly get stuck and no-one offers an opinion or has anything of value to say, then just say you’ll
make a note of it and research it, and get back to them next time with an answer.
With the Q&A session over, I then proceed with the actual “routines” for the evening.
Let me take a quick step back for a moment and mention here that eventually I offered two routines. I
didn’t call them routines obviously, but referred to them as parties. The first party I offered was a Palm
Reading Party, and the second was a Numerology and Pendulum Party.
(If you ever visited my old website you would have seen that I marketed some others like a Séance Party
and Graphology Party too, but those were never successful to this particular market. By the way, I
decided that I’d use Lee Earle’s Superscript for the Graphology Party, and ideas from various performers
like Docc Hilford and Rick Maue for the Séance Parties. Also, I bought the beautiful Spirit Spelling Board
by Leland Stone for use on the T.V. show… perhaps it’s time to bring the ol’ devil out again?)
10 | P a g e
Party Option 1: The Palm Reading Party
After the Q&A session mentioned above is over, I begin by showing the group the hand charts and
explaining the lines to them. Two sets of charts are included at the back of this book (again for your
printing pleasure). What you might want to do is print them onto thin card, and on the reverse side
make cheats or notes of the relevant line and reminders of anything interesting you feel you might
forget.
I start with the major lines and give only basic explanations, and the ladies follow along by looking at and
trying to read their own hands. The lines I use are the same I used for Palmistry Quickies – only I don’t
explain their reference to health, wealth or relationship issues. In fact I don’t explain at all how the lines
are read in relation to an actual reading. I just explain the physical attributes of the lines, their meanings,
and what to look for. Please see page 14 for descriptions.
This can be a lot of fun, and is part of the demonstration part of the evening. (Richard Webster
suggested something similar in Ladies Night, but I wanted it more interactive for my parties and
produced actual charts, as well as including letting the ladies read each other’s palms.)
I have a feeling now that I know what you might be thinking… and no, teaching them the basics doesn’t
distract from you as a reader. If anything, it would help your reading later and put them in awe of you as
a reader too. Besides, people want to be informed. Some even know a bit about palmistry already.
Include them. Remember that there is more than one school of thought regarding the interpretation of
some of the lines and reading of palms. There is no absolute right or wrong approach… just degrees of
differences. Capitalize on this and bring other viewpoints into your own.
As you will see I only show them a couple of charts and lines, and then we have a short 5 minute break.
(You may want to ask them to keep any questions or comments they have until you get back from the
break, otherwise you might be swamped with well-meaning people who just want to talk to you, and
you’re not going to have that much needed break!)
When we come back from the short break I ask everyone to split up into pairs, and then going through
the charts once more fairly quickly, I get them to look for and read the lines in each other’s palms.
This too is a lot of fun for them as they try their hand (pardon the pun) at being psychic.
I set aside about one and half to two hours for the evening up to this point. This may seem like a long
time but I approach it as if it were a social event and have fun with the girls. Remember, we’re actually
going for that after-sale. Your clients must like you first before they are willing to spend more time with
you.
11 | P a g e
When we’re done going through the charts I bring the evening to its informal closure, and announce
that I’ll be retiring to the room set aside for private readings. If there are no objections, I’ll use the
registration book as a means to call them in one at a time for a reading. In the meantime, they are free
to enjoy the tea, coffee and snacks provided by the hostess, as well as browse through the items I
brought with me (which sometimes includes an old second-hand laptop I loaded with the computerbased biofeedback game called The Wild Divine for them to play with – please see my site for further
details).
I thank the hostess for hosting the party by giving her a gift package of two of my (signed) pitch books
and a pendulum.
I then move to the private room and commence with the quick (introductory) palmistry readings in
which the client is given the opportunity to ask ONE SINGLE question about anything that is uppermost
on her mind at the time and of significant importance. I then use whatever means I have at my disposal
for answering it. I might use Palmistry, a tarot reading, numerology or a combination thereof to assess
an answer, and always be guided by intuition.
Sometimes just common sense will provide an answer for you. The trick in these cases is the way in
which you feed back the answer. There will be more on this later under the chapter on Counseling and
giving advice.
If I am unable to answer the question, I say so. Not everything has an answer at the time we seek it…
sometimes we need to take another step first in our journey before we are able to know what we need
to know. If this is the case, or even if I feel that it might be prudent to spend more time with the person,
I’ll try and set up another date. This isn’t just a scam to make more money from the same client. I treat
these cases differently and on an individual basis, and might even suggest just getting together over a
cup of coffee. Although most of your clients will come to you with a mild curiosity and want to be
entertained in having a reading, on the odd occasion you will face someone who has desperately seeked
you out as her last hope for clarity. A Psychic Home Party is not really the place to tackle these
situations. I’ll be giving you a few tips on this later.
12 | P a g e
Using the Charts
The cards will act as visual cues for the group to follow along with as you explain about each line,
referring to the reverse of the card for any notes you made.
The order of the cards are best read as:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
Life Line
Head Line
Heart Line
Fate Line
Relationship Lines
Children Lines
Sister Lines
I have found that most people know about these lines anyway, but few know how to read them properly
or what they really mean. With these lines you can tell a lot about a person anyway, so these are fun
lines to use as introduction to reading palms. Ask the group to take a look at their own hands and begin
to talk about the lines. Remember to keep it simple.
The reason we only use these 7 lines is because you can answer most questions someone is likely to
have with
h a combination of these lines, especially sin
since the same types of questions will come up time
and time again.
13 | P a g e
The Life Line – Vitality & Energy
As you can see in the diagram, the Life Line starts somewhere between the
Thumb and the Index Finger, and is the “big” line that runs across an
and down the
palm.
The important things to note are where the line begins (on the side of the hand
between Thumb and Index Finger), how it curves, the length of the line, and how
deep or shallow the line is.
If the Life Line begins close to the Thumb, the p
person is said to be humble.
If the Life Line begins closer to the Index Finger, the person is said to be ambitious.
If the Life Line begins about half way between the Thumb and Index Finger the person is said to be
practical.
If the Life Line runs out across
ss the palm, the person is more outgoing.
If the Life Line runs closer to the Thumb, kind of “hugging” it, the person is more conservative or
introverted.
If the Life Line looks to be deep, the person has a lot of vitality and energy.*
If the Life Line looks
ks to be shallow, the person has low energy, and finds it difficult to get going.*
(*Sometimes it helps for the person to relax the hand letting it “fold” in a little in order to see how deep
the line is.)
14 | P a g e
The Head Line – The Way a Person Thinks
The Head Line, like The Life Line, begins on the side of the hand somewhere
between the Thumb and Index Finger. But instead of running across and down
the palm like the Life Line, the Head Line runs across the palm almost in a
horizontal line, towards the pad below the Little Finger. See the diagram for
clarity.
This time we’ll look at the length of the Head Line, whether it’s straight or curved,
and it’s proximity to the Life Line.
If the Head Line is long, the person is a detailed thinker, taking their ttime
ime to think things through and
looking at all the details.
If the Head Line is short, the person is a quick thinker.
If the Head Line is straight, the person is logical and down to earth.
If the Head Line is curved, the person is creative and a bit of a d
dreamer.
If the Head Line is close to the Life Line, the person is said to be cautious in nature, having started life
being fairly dependent on family.
If the Head Line runs away from the Life Line, the person is said to be impulsive, having gained
independence at a young age.
15 | P a g e
The Heart Line - Relationships
Everyone is familiar with the Heart Line, which is sometimes also called the Love
Line. The Heart Line starts somewhere under the Little Finger, and runs across
the top of the palm under the base of th
the fingers, ending somewhere between
the Index and Middle Fingers.
With the Heart Line we need to assess if it runs across the palm as normal or if it
bends up a little. We also need to see where the Heart Line ends, and how it
ends.
If the Heart Line runs across the palm in a more or less straight line, the person is said to keep their
emotions inward and thought to be sensitive or intuitive in nature.
If the Heart Line bends upward, the person is said to express their emotions outward easily and is openopen
hearted.
arted. They wear their hearts on their sleeves so to speak.
If the Heart Line ends beneath the Index Finger, the person is emotionally open and idealistic.
If the Heart Line ends beneath the Middle Finger, the person is said to be a bit of a loner, and prefers
pre
their own company.
If the Heart Line ends between the Index and Middle Fingers the person is said to be emotionally
balanced.
If the Heart Line ends in a fork, the person is complexly emotional and compassionate.
If the Heart Line ends in several fork
forks,
s, the person is said to be deeply emotional and feels strongly about
things, and is also fortuitous and lucky.
16 | P a g e
The Fate Line – Careers, Business and Finances
The Fate Line, also known as the Line of Destiny, is sometimes missing from the
hands. Iff you can’t see it in one hand then try the other. It’s neither good nor
bad if the Fate Line is present or not, it just means different things.
The Fate Line can normally be seen as a fairly straight line that runs horizontally
up from near the wrist running
ning towards the base of the fingers.
Let’s look at the Fate Line’s characteristics.
Firstly, if there is NO Fate Line present, the person is quite an independent spirit.
A deep, clear Fate Line shows someone who is determined and driven.
A weak, fragmented
d Fate Line shows a restless soul.
The further away from the Life Line the Fate Line is, the more independent the person is.
If the Fate Line ends near or on the Head Line, the person is said to experience career obstacles brought
about by their outlook, orr the way they think about things.
If the Fate Line ends near or on the Heart Line, the person experiences career obstacles brought about
by their emotions, or the way they feel about things.
Next we move on to the Relationship Lines, Children Lines and ffinally Sister Lines.
17 | P a g e
Relationship Lines
As the name implies, Relationship Lines tell us about our relationships, and
more importantly, the impact those relationships had on us.
Relationship Lines can be seen as tiny horizontal lines just below the crease of
the Little Finger, often more to the outside of the hand.
Sometimes these lines are hard to see, so you need to ask your client to bend
the Little Finger in a little bit.
The number of Relationship Lines determine the number of serious relationships the person might have
had.
The deeper these Relationship Lines the more intense the relationship was.
The length of a Relationship Line in comparison to another Relationship Line will also give an indication
of the length of that relationship in comparis
comparison to the others.
Children Lines
Children Lines are seen as tiny vertical lines under the base of the Little Finger,
again off to the side of the hand.
The number of Children Lines indicate the number of children your client, in this
case a woman, can havee at any given time. This means that she might only have
one line showing today, but 6 months from now another might have developed
meaning she’s ready for more. This also doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll have
two, but two lines point to her potential to have two. Again, in a year or two’s
time she may be ready for more… or not.
These lines, like all the other lines on the hands, change over time as we ourselves change.
Sister Lines
Also known as the Line of Mars and the Line of Vitality, a Sister Line is any line
that runs parallel to a major line (Life Line, Heart Line, Head Line), and basically
strengthens it.
To have a Sister Line anywhere on the hand is considered fortunate.
A Sister Line can also point to an overabundance of energy and excess.
A Sister
ster Line protects during times of breaks indicated on the Life Line, thereby lessening the effect of
something.
A prominent Sister Line (or Line of Mars) shows courageousness and temperament.
18 | P a g e
The Palm Reading Party – a Summary of the Evening’s Program
1. Short Introduction of who you are and what you do.
2. Short Introduction of the topic of Palmistry and what people may expect from the evening.
(The above shouldn’t take more than 20 minutes.)
3. Short question and answering session, including people’s past experiences and opinions.
(Try and keep this to not more than 20 minutes as well. You want them to talk, but not to
much.)
4. Exercise One: Looking at Your Own Hand
(The time taken here will depend on how much you want to say about the different lines in the
palms of the hands, and the questions you might get from the group about these lines.)
5. Optional Break for tea and coffee (5-10 minutes only)
6. Exercise Two: Looking at Your Friend’s Hand
(The time taken here will depend on how much you want to say about the different lines in the
palms of the hands, and the questions you might get from the group about these lines.)
7. Break for tea, coffee and snacks, Add-on Sales, and private Introductory Readings.
19 | P a g e
Party Option 2: Numerology & Pendulum Party
This second party option works much the same as the Palmistry Party, except that instead of the group
reading their own hands first and then the hands of their friends, I show them how to make and use a
pendulum.
The materials I use are very simple and cheap… string and washers. The simple reason for this is that
they can keep the pendulum they make if they want to, and hopefully decide to buy one of the nicer
ones I brought with me if they’re interested.
After they have made the make-shift pendulums, I instruct them in the proper way to use them. I hand
out a business card (see the back of the book), with my contact details on one side and a simple diagram
for pendulum use on the other side.
I talk them through using the pendulum to firstly get movement, and then answer questions they know
the answer to. (See the following chapter for more information.)
We then end the demonstration part of the evening, I present the hostess with a gift, mention the items
I’ve brought with me, and then move to the private room for one-on-one readings.
This time however, I use Numerology as the basis of my reading. (For a nice variation see Jim Callahan’s
Simple Lo-Shu Square.)
Again, as with Palmistry, the client gets to ask ONE SINGLE question most relevant to her at this time.
However, just for variation and because she’s now learned to use a pendulum, I now give her the option
of asking it silently and divining an answer for herself using her pendulum. Or she can voice the question
out loud and I’ll attempt to answer it as before. Sometimes we use a combination of the silent question
and accompanying pendulum work first, and then I back it up with any insights I might have or might
have gained from her reading her palms, numerology or a tarot card.
The hostess is the last in line to receive a reading, and when everyone has been read, the evening is
concluded.
Side Note:
The format is almost the same for the teen birthday party versions of the above, with more focus
on giving the girls readings (within the group), and keeping it light-hearted and fun. I still get them
to read each other’s palms, but keep mostly to the Heart, Head and Life lines. Pendulums also play
a big part in these parties.
20 | P a g e
Moving the Pendulum
The following
ollowing is an excerpt from my Simple ESP Card Reading System
System:
Anyone who knows me knows I love using Pendulums. Or rather, I love directing others to use
u the
Pendulum. A Pendulum automatically assumes a trance state in the user, as you have to consciously let
go of moving it and allow the subconscious to do it! People are also curious of a Pendulum, and it adds a
sense of mystery to readings. I have even read somewhere before that although many people have their
own Pendulums, they seldom know how to use it properly – so the fascination never ceases.
All literature on working with Pendulums begins with explaining how to first hold it and secondly test for
f
a yes/no response. I’ll do the same here.
The proper way to hold the Pendulum so as not to influence the swing in
an obvious way is to hold one end (not the bob) between the thumb and
index finger, and allow the cord to hang over the index finger. Your elbow
should be resting on the table. (In the photograph my hand is open for
clarity; your hand should be closed into a loose fist.)
Most literature then goes on to assign certain swings or movements to yes/no responses.
After I show the group how to hold
ld the pendulum, and tell them to keep their hands absolutely still and
not to move, I direct their attention to the back of the business cards and the lines and circles printed
thereon.
Starting with the horizontal line (I find this is the easiest to beg
begin
in with), I ask them to will the pendulum
to move with their mind. It takes a little getting used to, but eventually the pendulums around the room
will start swinging to and fro along the horizontal line.
I ask them to physically stop the pendulum, and th
then
en try to move it up and down along the vertical line.
This happens a lot faster now as they know what’s going on and what to expect.
After a short time I ask them to will the pendulum to stop (which again takes a little practice), and then
to will it to move in a clockwise circle. Once they have that circular movement right, I ask them to will it
to stop once again, and then move in an anti
anti-clockwise direction.
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As you probably know by now the movement of the pendulum is caused by ideomotor response: those
tiny movements of muscle imperceptible to conscious awareness. I tell them so. I don’t attribute the
movements of the pendulum to anything but their own subconscious volitions. You can decide how you
want to frame it. I suggest going the scientific route. I think the mystery is enhanced when they realize
that they are making the pendulum move, but are unable to see how. Linking this to the subconscious
mind further seals the deal.
Once they are enjoying moving the pendulum easily and freely without conscious awareness, I ask them
to test it by asking simple questions, and seeing the answers. Now this part is largely of a self-fulfilling
nature. All you need to do is assign values to the lines and circle on the card, and tell them what to do!
To make it easier to remember and thus not cause any confusion, I ask them to write in the values on
the back of the business card:
•
•
•
•
The horizontal line
The vertical line
Clockwise direction
Anti-Clockwise direction
= NO (As if shaking your head from side to side)
= YES (As if nodding your head up and down)
= MAYBE
= I DON’T KNOW or I DON’T WANT TO ANSWER
So if they see the answers – YES, NO, MAYBE, I DON’T KNOW – and they know the questions… well, you
can see where this is heading.
All it takes is a little bit of suggestive persuasion (sometimes referred to as conversational hypnosis) to
get the pendulum moving and to help them answer the questions. For example: “See? There it goes… it’s
moving… slowly… slowly… yes, it’s moving now… great… look at it go!”
Now that they have the basics almost any question can be answered using that business card and
pendulum.
22 | P a g e
Setting up the Room & Examining the Tools of the Trade
I prefer to give the private one-on-one
one readings in a separate room away from the rest for the group.
gr
On
very few occasions has this been impossible, and at these times I set myself up in the kitchen, and at
worst, in a corner of the room. Obviously then, if you’re in the corner of the room where everyone else
is, you have to ensure they chat quietly amongst themselves while you work.
Ideally though, a small table is made available for my use in a private room. I cover the table or the area
of the table I am going to work on with a nice heavy, purple, velvet cloth, and I place a candle on the
table. The
he main lights are turned down or switched off, and sometimes I light some incense or an aroma
candle as well*.. On many occasions I have even taken my ipod and its mini-speakers
speakers with and played
soft meditative music in the background – it’s all about creating
ing a mood conducive to giving readings.
(Please, no panpipes! See the Resource page I created on my website for ideas and suggestions. Another
piece of advice I can give is to place the ipod and speakers out of sight so that it doesn’t become a
distraction.)
If I plan to do a palmistry reading I take a little velvet cushion with
with, and an
implement I bought many years ago (which is used for massaging knots in
the muscles of the hands) is used as a pointing device. It just adds a little
“something” to the reading
ding when I reach over and use the implement to
point out a particularly fine line. (Most of the time though, I simply trace
the lines with my index finger. Touch
ouch can be a therapeutic tool in itself.)
As an additional tool for answering questions, I’ll ha
have my Psycards (by Nick Hobson & Maggie Keen) in
my carry bag. I used to choose between The Osho Zen Tarot and The Sacred Circle tarot deck but have
recently opted for the more friendly Psycards. Your favorite tarot deck will do.
Here’s a tip. Use it or not.
One word: PHEROMONES
I have played around with the idea of using pheromones during the reading process. My own tests
seem to indicate that new clients become more talkative when I used the pheromones.
There is a company in California that carries small bottles that are relatively cheap to try out, and
they offer a money back guarantee too. If you decide to look into the use of pheromones to
enhance your presence and the reading
reading, check out “Instant Shine”, “Instant
Instant Openness”,
Openness and
“Instant Female Magic”” as discussed later in this book. Use them at your own discretion.
Email me from this ebook’s resource page on my website for a discount on pheromones if you’re
interested. (www.mindillusions.co.za/partyresources.htm
www.mindillusions.co.za/partyresources.htm)
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I print all my party business cards on my home printer, and so have 3 different backings that I use:
1. A stylized version of the Palmistry Quickies business card
2. A Numerology based business card
3. A backing for use with the pendulum
You should already be familiar with number 1, the Palmistry Quickies business card. If not, shame on
you! It’s the quickest and most effective way to give mini palm readings, and it leaves the client with a
nice little souvenir.
Number 2, the Numerology based business card, simply has a space for the person’s name, the current
date, and their birth date. I also included a space to write their Birth Path Number, their Destiny
Number, their Heart’s Desire Number, and their Personality Number. I calculate the relevant numbers
on a separate sheet and then simply fill them in on the card, giving the reading as I go along. I highly
recommend Richard Webster’s Cold Reading the Future with Numerology if you want to learn about
readings using Numerology. Get it!
For the sake of completion I have included an example of the basics of Numerology below, which is
freely available on the internet and in numerous books on the subject. Richard Webster’s book just gives
you “oh so much more”, and comes with your very own free-to-use pitch book You and Your Lucky Stars.
Number 3, the pendulum card, has already been discussed above. The main point being that no matter
what, the client will leave with at least one of my business cards, if not two.
24 | P a g e
Numerology Basics of Calculating the Birth Path Number
Write down the year you were born in: For me it’s 1971
Now add each individual digit together: 1 + 9 + 7 + 1 = 18
Reduce that total down to a single digit (EXCEPT if the answer is a Master Number like 11 or 22): 1 + 8 =
9
9 is my Birth Year, but not my Birth Path Number. Let’s continue with the calculations.
Write down the month of your birth as a number: I was born in August, so that’s the 8th month.
If you were born in October, November or December, you’d have double digits that have to be reduced
to a single digit:
October
=
10
=
1+0=1
November
=
11
=
1+1=2
December
=
12
=
1+2=3
Now write down you’re the date of your birth: For me it’s 29 = 2 + 9 = 11 = 1 + 1 = 2
Now add the three totals of your birth year, birth month and birth day, and keep reducing until you get a
single digit (EXCEPT if you get an answer of 11 or 22): 9 + 8 + 2 = 19 = 1 + 9 = 10 = 1 + 0 = 1
Calculated a different, but easier way:
1
9
7
2
0
1
9
8
2
0
0
8
2008 = 2 + 0 + 0 + 8 = 10 = 1 + 0 = 1
So, being born on 29-08-1971, I have a Birth Path Number of 1.
Now what does that mean? It means that I should have the qualities that embrace leadership and taking
initiative… getting things done. I should have direction and be independent. My positive traits are to be
a pioneering spirit, have inventive ideas, develop strong leadership skills, have an individualistic style,
and be courageous. My negative traits include being overly assertive or aggressive, being dominating,
impulsive, egotistic, and boastful.
I used the word ‘should’ in the previous paragraph because these are the qualities I should aspire
towards, while the negative traits are obviously opposites of that and should be avoided.
25 | P a g e
For a more thorough look at how to use numerology in readings I recommend Richard Webster’s book
mentioned above.
In his How to Give Fun & Amazing Psychic Readings Vol. 1 DVD Stuart Cumberland explains a clever way
of remembering the meaning of each number. Simply expand on the meanings through word
association.
For more meanings of numbers that will give you additional ideas of what you could say during a
numerology reading, see www.numerology-free.com/basics-of-numerology.html *
For an addition to your current Numerology reading research, take a look at the section on Astrology
and numbers at http://www.astrologyzine.com/numerfaq.shtml *
*These pages are copyright. I’d still like you to benefit from my research though, so feel free to visit them and read them in full.
26 | P a g e
Back of Room Sales
Here is my secret to getting items for BOR sales… visit eBay!
In fact, a quick Google search will show many results of second hand book stores that deal in esoteric
literature; and finding a wholesale pendulum and tarot card dealer is easier than you think.
However, eBay is still my favorite. (Most probably because it’s actually easier for me as a South African
to search one site and buy off there, even though I’m buying from different dealers.) Items can be
bought in bulk and marked up at least 100% without worry.
Also, do some research into writing and printing your own pitch books. Pitch books are the generic
books on Palmistry, Numerology, etc, written especially for you, usually by a ghost writer, with your
name printed on the cover as the author. But it’s easier than you think to write your own.
Remember that as entertainers and performers our vision can be very one-sided at times, meaning that
we tend to forget that for our audiences many of these things are far more novel than what they are for
us. Finding information to put into a pitch book on Palmistry or Numerology is very easy when you take
into account the vast amount of information already freely available on the internet.
Pitch books establish you as a noted expert and authority in your chosen field, are cheap to print, and
are guaranteed to be best sellers at your parties.
Visit http://www.mevproshop.com/pitchbook&bor-index.html if you simply don’t have the time or
inclination to write your own pitch books. (Other authors offering pitch books include Richard Webster
and John Riggs.)
27 | P a g e
Part 2: Enhancing the Reading Experience
In this section I’d like to discuss a topic seldom talked about in literature on giving psychic readings, and
that is the tools you can use to enhance the actual reading experience.
Some of what I am about to say might seem natural and obvious to you, as it did to me the first time I
considered it in the context of giving readings; but the change for me came about when I started giving
readings with the conscious intention of using these specific tools. I urge you to try the same.
I have to admit that I learned what I considered the most practical applications of NLP and Persuasion
from the seduction/dating/pick up artist approach. Studying the ideas of NLP and Persuasion under this
guise helped me understand its applications easier. It is from this approach that I draw most of these
tools. There are several links to relevant sites on my website that I recommend you try out.
Let’s now take a look at some of these tools as from the view of giving a reading, and use that frame to
guide us.
Building Rapport
Much has already been written both online and in publications dedicated to communication and NLP,
etc, about building rapport. What is important here is how to build rapport in the context of giving a
psychic reading.
When you are in rapport with someone it feels as if you are both on the same wavelength – there is
integrity, caring and trust. When that person talks to you, she feels a sense of comfort and
understanding coming from you. Having rapport helps you communicate at a deep level. Because the
other person feels you are like her, she is at ease and ready to open up to you.
Start to build rapport by breaking down your communication into its verbal and non-verbal
elements:
1. Words: The words and phrases you use can say a lot about you: your nationality, culture,
age, gender and class, education, interests, values, beliefs and the kind of work you do.
2. Physiology: Your non-verbal communication can reveal your emotions, the power you
have in relation to the other person and whether you’re sexually attracted to them. Your
posture, expressions and gestures all leak information (whether you’re trying to control
them or not).
3. Voice: The next time someone phones you, pay attention to their voice. People say a lot
through tone, speed, pitch and timbre (vocal texture).
28 | P a g e
When rapport doesn’t come automatically, you can build it by matching. Matching another person’s
communication is the way to build rapport at a deep unconscious level. When two people are in rapport
they naturally match or adopt some of the other person’s words, postures, gestures, voice tone and
speed. You feel connected to each other.
Matching is not the same as mimicry – when you mimic someone you copy everything about them.
Matching is more subtle and stays outside the other person’s conscious awareness. Be subtle. Get into
the rhythm of the other person’s voice and body. Posture is the quickest detail you can match.
Signs of rapport will include:
•
•
•
You might notice a warm feeling, probably in your stomach.
Your face and neck may change color slightly.
You may suddenly feel close to the other person, as if you have known him or her for a
long time.
Consciously creating this rapport definitely enhances the reading experience for both you and your
client.
Most of the time the client will come to you out of a need. They will want clarity on an issue. They may
even either feel excited or apprehensive at first. On greeting the client I assess the client’s energy level
and amend mine accordingly. If they appear shy and timid, I relax and speak softly and slowly. If they
appear confident and full of energy, I perk up and make my actions more forceful and direct, in line with
their own actions. In other words, my first step is to consciously pace my client by matching or mirroring
their internal state. Regardless of whether they are excited or apprehensive, after mirroring I begin
leading their state towards one more conducive for the reading. I begin to use more wider and open
gestures, along with maximum eye contact, to subconsciously communicate a trusting environment.
Side Note:
Once you have paced the other person, you have demonstrated you are on their side. You can now
start to lead by keeping rapport while gradually changing the speed at which you are talking, or
shifting position so that she follows you – and in doing so changing her emotional state.
29 | P a g e
Generally speaking, the longer the eye contact between two people, the greater the intimacy is
developed. Eye contact has also been shown to be a significant factor in the persuasion process. In the
context of giving a reading, this translates as you being recognized as being an authority figure. The
longer your eye contact, the more self-esteem you are perceived to have. The more eye contact you can
maintain, the higher self esteem you actually rate yourself on as well! To be perceived as more likable
gives you an edge during the reading. Eye contact is an important way to build this emotional bond and
likeability. Check: Are your eyes clear or are they bloodshot?
Another reason for maintaining eye contact is that you can assess if what you’re saying is having the
desired impact. Pupils enlarge when people are talking about things that bring them joy or happiness.
They often contract when discussing issues that bring them sadness or are not interested in. Watching
someone’s eyes closely will give you volumes of information. Eyes are truly the windows to the soul!
Once you’ve established good rapport you may also want to begin using your voice more effectively.
Besides tone, speed, pitch and timbre, taking care of how you speak and communicate verbally will
benefit you in that you will sound more intelligent, powerful, polished, articulate and confident.
You don’t need to use big words to impress, just speak a bit slower to allow yourself time to select your
most appropriate vocabulary and to give the impression of thoughtfulness. This will also help negate the
use of colloquialisms and subconscious verbal habits (“like…”, “you know…”, etc.); not to mention also
giving you extra time to decide what to say. You will also sound more powerful when you use short,
simple declarative sentences. You say what you mean and you mean what you say. To sound more
polished never answer a question with a blunt 'yes' or 'no.' Append a short phrase of clarification. For
example, "No, I did not see it." "Yes, I know Mary." To sound more articulate, make a special effort to
pronounce the final sound in a word and use its energy to carry over to the following word. Pay special
attention to the final 't' and 'ng' sounds. And finally, to sound more confident, carry your body upright.
Hold your head as if you had a crown on it. Don't let your arms and legs have side to side motion when
you move.
If I find the sitter to be extremely nervous or not as relaxed as they could be, I lead them in a short
visualization to relax them. This visualization is simply a series of guided deep breathing exercises
together with imagining a kind of warmth coming over the body, and goes something like this:
“Just close your eyes for a moment. Take a deep breath, and as you let it out, allow your shoulders to
drop and just relax into a pleasant state. That’s right. Take another deep breath and just imagine a
warmth spreading over your body… you’re feeling more and more relaxed and comfortable…”
As any hypnotist will tell you, giving encouragement while giving suggestions is paramount to the
success of inducing a relaxed and conducive state. Using plenty of “Thaaat’s right…” (with a kind of
drawl on “that”) gives the needed encouragement.
30 | P a g e
Advanced Psychic Rapport
There is a technique discussed by David Barron in one of his Persuasion courses which you might
mig say
borders on being psychic; or at least requires using your normal senses in a slightly novel
vel way. It’s
definitely an advanced form of establishing rapport, and as ssuch will require
equire somewhat of an open mind
to try out.
The best way for me to describe it is for you to pretend, right now, that you’re sitting in front of
someone you want to establish
lish this deep rapport with. As you see them sitting there in front of you,
imagine for a moment that they have an etheric double, an identical duplicate them,, also sitting in front
of you, facing them.
Imagine now that you step into this etheric double,
double
and begin to get a sense of what it feels like being this
other person. Focus on the kinesthetic and physiology
– the physical feelings – for a moment.
moment Involve as
many as your imagined senses as you can: Imagine
what they might be seeing right now(which would be
you and the surroundings); imagine what it would be
like to have those type of arms, to be that particular
height, age, etc.;; imagine being that particular
temperature; and so on. Imagine the other person to
be like a body suit that you begin trying
tryi on and
wearing.
As you do this, what tends to happen is that your conscious mind becomes overwhelmed, and your
subconscious mind begins to take over the rapport. What you get is being the person you’re sitting with.
As strange as this may sound, with pr
practice
actice you’ll begin to have a deeper connection to the person
you’re in rapport with, and you’ll begin to experience deeper insights into them… a kind of sensitivity or
empathy.
A way of sorts to practice this is to observe someone at a coffee shop or rest
restaurant,
aurant, and begin the
exercise. Imagine putting yourself into their shoes, so to speak. Naturally, whatever feelings or insights
you pick up might not even be theirs, and might come from your own projections and thoughts about
them, but push on through and don’t give up. Then again, if you don’t recognize the feeling or thought
as something belonging to you, there is a chance that you’re picking up a very subtle form of
communication from them that does indeed belong to them. You only have to recognize it and
a
acknowledge it.
31 | P a g e
Let me give you a simple example to illustrate these types of insights and subtle communication:
•
Suppose you meet someone for the first time and you begin to establish rapport with them at
the normal level… you mirror and match their body language, breathing rate, etc. After a while
you decide to go deeper, and try out this advanced form of rapport. All of a sudden you might
feel tired and melancholic, and, remembering what you’re doing, you realize that these feelings
don’t belong to you but belong to the other person. You take another look at them, with fresh
insight, and there it is… something you didn’t notice before… their shoulders are dropped,
almost hunched over, a darkness around the eyes, a heavy sigh now and then. And so on.
In essence then, you will become more aware of the very subtle communication given off by people you
come into contact with.
One of the concerns of doing this type of exercise is picking up vibes or feelings from others and having
those feelings affect you in a negative way. This is easily overcome by using your will in bringing more of
your presence into what you’re doing. It’s also a good idea to imagine bathing yourself in white light (or
the appropriate visualization for you) at the end of the exercise, giving yourself a kind of mental energy
shower to cleanse yourself of any unwanted feelings.
Another concern is the possible intrusion the other person might feel. A way to prevent this is to simply
ask them permission to do the exercise by saying “Do you mind if I step into your shoes for a moment?”
(You obviously don’t need to tell them exactly what you’re going to do.)
Much of what you will experience will rely on how in touch you are with your own intuition.
Side Note:
As a means to help you get in tune, you can ask yourself the following question:
“What can I observe about this person that must be true that I can comment on to make a
connection?”
Use this observation and let it expand into something more meaningful that you can convey in a
subtle way.
Feed the observation back by including the line, “I have an intuition about you…”
32 | P a g e
Tips for learning rapport:
1. Physiology: Observe the other person’s sitting or standing position. Match any of the
following: posture, facial expressions, gestures, head tilt, breathing, eye blink rate, etc.
Remember, mirroring and matching is best used as subtly as possible. Don’t overtly copy
the person you’re trying to establish rapport with. If they have their legs crossed, you can
interlace your fingers. If they sit back you can sit back too.*
2. Voice qualities: You can match a person’s voice qualities, words she marks out by tone or
emphasis, timbre (clear and resonant or gravely and harsh), and other linguistic
idiosyncrasies such as sentence length, jargon, or particular phrases.
3. Speed or pace: How people speak varies considerably according to their preferred
representational system (i.e. the way they prefer to process information), mood, culture or
nationality. Be on the lookout to match these qualities too.
4. Spend time practicing just one form of matching until you can use this easily and without
thinking about it. Then add another element, and so on.
5. Be open to another’s point of view of the world, however strange or distorted it may
appear to you. As a reader, it’s best anyway not to become judgmental of someone else’s
views.
6. Keen observation and conscious practice is all there really is to it.
*I picked up an interesting little bit from my studies in Psycho-Neuro-Immunology that has
stayed with me since:
When you sit back in a chair you gain a wider perspective of whatever it is you’re
considering, kind of like observing it from a distance and seeing the bigger picture. By
moving a client consciously into this wider perspective you can also separate them from
their emotional experience of whatever it is they are considering. Likewise, by sitting
forward and adopting a “leaning into” body position (while seated), the client will engage
their feelings more, and also become more detail focused. When needed, I simply ask
them to indulge me and sit forward or lean back.
So to summarize this chapter:
•
•
•
•
•
Match the sitter’s internal state and establish rapport.
Use wide open gestures and lots of eye contact to establish trust.
Lead their internal state to a place where they are relaxed and receptive.
Become mildly aware of how your verbal communication can also impact the reading
experience, especially as it reflects on you.
Try out the advanced rapport building exercise and develop your intuition more.
33 | P a g e
Rapport and Language to Entice
As mentioned above, each person has a few words and phrases that she will mark out in her speech by
using them time and again or by putting particular emphasis on them. This is language that has some
personal meaning or emotional or cultural significance to them.
Furthermore, there are certain words, referred to as ‘trance words' in Speed Seduction circles, that
describe the person’s feelings about something (x), including their values and beliefs.
For example: The client asks if there is travel in her future. Before answering the question you could ask,
“What do you feel is important about traveling (x)?”
She might answer, “Well, travel is exciting. Whenever I travel it’s like I have an adventure. I always meet
new people and have exciting new experiences!”
So her particular trance words in this case would be “excitement, adventure, meeting new people,
having new experiences”. These are the words she leaned on.
By simply feeding these trance words back to her before you answer, or as part of your answer to her,
you’ll enhance the reading even more and establish deeper rapport.
Rapport and Catch Phrases
You’ve already been introduced to a particular handy catch phrase in the above paragraph, namely,
“What do you feel is important about x?”
Not only does such a phrase provide you with the client’s values and beliefs about something, but it also
helps draw your client further into the reading. It opens up the channels of communication and
conversation in a sincere way.
Another catch phrase to consider is the following: “And as you think about it now, what would you
have to experience here today to make this worthwhile to you?”
With this particular phrase, said at the beginning of a reading session, you will find that your client
becomes disarmed, and you are easily able to find out what her expectations are. It is even likely that
she will immediately state her question or reason for having a reading at this point.
Having something to say during a reading goes beyond just reading via a system or through an oracle… it
can include elements of elegant communication designed to elicit particular states. It can work for you.
Why not make the best of it then?
34 | P a g e
Personal Hygiene
No longer on the topic of formal rapport - yet something just as important - this should go without
saying. But let’s just create a short checklist to make sure we’ve taken care of some essentials:
Are your finger nails clean and trimmed?
Are your hands clean?
Smokers and non-smokers alike, is your breath fresh? Do you keep a breath mint or spray handy?
Are you clean shaven? (If that’s part of your image)
Is your hair tidy?
Are your clothes clean?
Do your shoes shine? (Women love shoes and will take note of the shoes you wear.)
Do you smell nice?*
*Scent and smell is a very personal thing, and what smells nice to you might smell very different to
someone else. When I began playing around with pheromones I heeded the advice of those on the
forums… less is better. I have used the following. If you decide to try out pheromones, which I suggest
you do anyway just to see if they work for you, try any or all of the following. Also find a nice cologne or
spray that enhances the pheromones. If you’re not sure what to use, ask that favorite lady in your life
for advice. And Do NOT use “Turn Up The Heat” or “Ammo” during your readings! As mentioned before,
email me from the resources page (www.mindillusions.co.za/partyresources.htm ) for a discount on
your purchase.
Pheromone Product
Description from the website
Instant Shine
Puts you in a great mood and makes you feel
vibrant and confident. Makes others around you
feel good too. Gives you that “Shine of Youth”.
Instant Openness*
An icebreaker. A great way to get things started. It
allows you and those around you to just relax and
watch the barriers melt away. Helps to lighten the
mood and increase the flow (quantity) of
communication.
Instant Female Magic
Not only can it excite the women in your life, but it
works especially well at putting women around
you at ease. Women will tend to relax and feel
better around you.
Alpha 314
Communicates and enhances all attributes of a
classically ideal and powerful man.
*Be careful of using too much Instant Openness. In my experience, too much seems to make the ladies talk… a lot!
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Counseling and Giving Advice during the Psychic Reading
Although it’s not my intention to launch into a deep discourse on the elements of counseling and giving
advice, I thought it necessary to at least discuss the following in relation to giving psychic readings.
Webster Dictionary - Counseling: "A practice or professional service designed to guide an individual to a
better understanding of his problems and potentialities by utilizing modern psychological principles and
methods, especially in collecting case history data, using various techniques of the personal interview,
and testing interests and aptitudes."
It would seem then that according to Webster, counseling requires a formal study and approach of some
sorts, usually in conjunction with, and including at least the very basics of, psychology. Fortunately for
me I’m a registered counselor in Psycho-Neuro-Immunology (PNI) here in SA, but for many more of us
any form of formal counseling is probably out of the question. However, there is something you can do
that won’t cause any harm. But before we get to that, let’s look at giving advice.
Firstly, and probably most importantly, as always, don’t give any legal or medical advice. Giving such
advice could lead to you being sued or being held liable.
Also, be very careful about giving advice about relationships. You wouldn’t want someone’s husband or
boyfriend showing up to give you a beating because his wife or girlfriend left him and you, the “psychic”,
said she should!
As you will appreciate then, giving advice in the context of a psychic reading can be a little tricky,
especially when the traditional view of the psychic has always been to be able to foretell the future. Yet,
people will expect you to be able to advise them according to that future you supposedly psychically
see.
The problem, in my opinion, is solved by utilizing a form of therapy I learned about in PNI founded by
Carl Rogers (1902-1987) referred to as ‘client-centered’ or ‘non-directive’ therapy – now widely known
as Rogerian Therapy – which has at its core the assumption that we already have the answers to all the
questions we have. (This also pertains to having the solution to all the problems we think we have.)
If I approach giving advice from this perspective, my job becomes easier by simply:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Listening carefully to the client when they speak of their concerns,
Noting the language they use to describe those concerns,
Asking questions to gain clarity (for both myself and the client),
Feeding it all back to them in a simplified manner,
And finally suggesting a tool that will help them gain further clarity.
In other words then, I mirror or reflect the situation back to the client in simpler terms, for the client’s
further contemplation. The following two examples are ways to incorporate this approach into a
reading.
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Let’s expand on the example of the woman above who asked if there is any travel in her future. During
the reading, she might say, “I really need a break. I’ve got to get away. Is there any sign of travel in my
future?”
To gain clarity you might ask, “What is important to you about travel?”
She responds, “Well, travel is exciting. Whenever I travel it’s like I have an adventure. I always meet new
people and have exciting new experiences!”
You note that she leans on the words “excitement, adventure, meeting new people, having new
experiences”. You also note however that she initially said that she needs a break and that she has to
get away.
“Earlier you said you need a break… that you have to get away. What is important to you about getting
away?”
She says, “I’m just tired of the same old things. Every day is the same. I need a break!”
You say, “So, are you then saying that having an exciting adventure is what you’re really wanting?”
“Yes! Exactly!”
“Well, I can see that if you’re open yourself to the opportunities you’ll find that break that you want so
badly. The key is to relax and allow it to come to you. As for travel, you never know what will happen
when you focus on what you really want. Let’s take a look at what the cards say…”
Using the Rogers approach, I have attempted to clarify her question; I have simplified and fed it back to
her, and given her the advice of “relax, be open to opportunities, and focus on what you really want.”
Reading the tarot or her palm at this point is a way that allows you to give support to that advice.
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Let’s consider another example. A woman comes to you saying that she and her sister have been
arguing a lot lately. Her sister is going through a tough time and she wants to help. Her sister, however,
is refusing her help. What should she do?
Common sense tells us that if her sister wanted her help she would ask for it, assuming of course that
their current relationship is healthy. Before you read the tarot or look at this woman’s palm for your
answer, gain some clarity.
You: “How is your relationship with your sister at the moment?”
Her: “It’s fine. We’ve always been best friends. We could share anything.”
You: “And do you feel now that she is no longer your best friend?”
Her: “Well no. I just don’t understand why she won’t accept my help.”
You: “Has she given you any reason why she doesn’t want your help?”
Her: “No. She just says she needs to do this on her own.”
You: “Do you think you can trust her to do it on her own?”
Her: “Oh yes, she has always been very capable.”
You: “I see. Is it possible then that your sister feels she can handle this problem by herself, and perhaps
just needs time?”
Her: “Well yes. That’s possible. But she won’t accept my help.”
You: “Perhaps she feels she doesn’t need your help. Sometimes we all need to take a step back from a
situation and just allow others to be and do what they will. May I see your hand? Yes, I can see here that
you’re a person who feels deeply. Family and friends are important to you. You have a strong will and a
determined nature that drives you toward your goals. However, sometimes that will can appear forceful
and you need to keep it in check. Fortunately I can see too that you’re flexible, and willing to… etc”.
Or
You: “Perhaps she feels she doesn’t need your help. Sometimes we all need to take a step back from a
situation and just allow others to be and do what they will. Please turn over a card. Yes, this card
indicates that you’re a person who feels deeply. Family and friends are important to you. You have a
strong will and a determined nature that drives you toward your goals. However, sometimes that will
can appear forceful and you need to keep it in check. Please turn over another card. Ah yes, we can see
here that you’re flexible, and willing to… etc”.
The reading thus becomes a tool with which to back up the advice you gave.
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As an addition to this particular approach, a useful tool I often suggest to help someone gain further
clarity for themselves is to write it all down in a letter or notebook.
Writing all your thoughts down about a situation often helps by removing it from the endless loop
created by thinking about something, gets it out of your head and body, and onto something of
substance (in this case a piece of paper) where you can view it better. If anything, writing about
something just helps clear the emotions generated by that situation. Additional advice would be to then
burn the piece of paper, symbolically releasing those negative feelings.
While writing can overtly be suggested as a tool to gain clarity, another covert approach to giving advice
is to use metaphorical language and story-telling, which we’ll deal with in the next chapter.
Finally, another catch phrase you could use as a lead in to giving advice is, “As I listen to you, there are
some ideas coming up for me that you might find useful. Would you like to hear them?”
The Secret of How to Foretell the Future
If truth be told, foretelling the future is quite possible when you follow a simple rule. The rule is thus:
If someone does as they have always done,
you can predict their actions and the outcome.
This rule is based on the simple notion that we are all creatures of habit, and find change to be
uncomfortable and even painful sometimes, and thus try to avoid it at all cost. If we are unwilling to
change then, chances are we will repeat the same disempowering actions well into the future.
-Remember your experience does not lead to the only solution.
-Sometimes the person just needs encouragement, not advice.
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The Message in the Metaphor
We love listening to stories, and as any good story teller knows, as well as having characters, a
beginning, a middle and an end, stories have meanings. A metaphor is any story used to illustrate a
point or an idea.
Storytelling is an age-old tool used to connect with both the conscious and subconscious, and impart
wisdom. The listener identifies with a key character, which helps them to accept the message of the
story. You can use metaphors to increase the effectiveness of your communication with your client,
especially with their subconscious mind, as stories are easy for the subconscious mind to remember.
Metaphors can highlight hopes, beliefs, anxieties, and solutions; and are thus a safe way to give advice.
Creating stories with metaphorical language is actually a lot simpler than it seems. The aim is to keep the
conscious mind busy long enough with the story itself; long enough to activate the subconscious mind’s
search for the meanings.
When I first started using metaphors as a means to give advice, I was caught out at least twice. I found
out though that it didn’t matter that the person realized what I was doing and consciously grasped the
similarities between their own situation and the one I was presenting in the story. Even with their
conscious awareness, and the “Aha! I know what you’re trying to do!” the message still got through.
However, it’s obviously more beneficial to be able to tell the story without the client knowing what
you’re up to!
Use the following tips to guide you in creating your stories and metaphors. Remember to keep it simple.
Take a look at the following table.
Client’s Story
Main Character
Supporting Character
Action
Outcome
Therapeutic Metaphor
Main Character
Supporting Character
Action
Outcome
Bridge
New Outcome
On the left side of the table we have the client’s story, and on the right side we see how the therapeutic
metaphor is to be constructed. Both the client’s story and the metaphor draw parallels to a point, and
then the metaphor describes a bridge, or some sort of action, to access a new outcome.
This new outcome is meant to empower and serve as encouragement for our client to take matters into
their own hands. So just like the client’s story contains a main character, supporting character, action
and outcome, so too will the story that you create.
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Choose a metaphor your client can relate to, and be sure it is appropriate in the context you are using it.
Relate each feature of the idea you’re selling or the advice you want to give to a feature in the story.
To be most effective, although not essential, use language of the representational system that your
client will most relate to. This is equally true for establishing greater rapport.
In other words, while they speak, listen for words (referred to in NLP as ‘predicates’) that will give you
an indication of their preferred representational system (ie. how they prefer to process information).
Look out for words like:
Predicates – Words and Phrases
Look, see, clear, bright, picture, clarify, vision,
highlight, focus, colorful, seems, watch,
perspective, etc
Representational System
The person prefers the Visual representational
system. “I see what you mean.” “Look here, I need
to know…”
Noise, hear, resonate, talk, harmony, speak,
rhythm, clear, cry, say, discuss, etc
The person prefers the Auditory representational
system. “I hear you.” “I’m not being very clear, am
I?”
Feel, touch, grab, feeling, concrete, handle,
tackle, pressure, catch on to, start from scratch,
etc
The person prefers the Kinaesthetic
representational system. “I don’t feel right about
this.” “I can handle this.”
Sense, think, decide, process, motivate, learn,
mention, etc
The person uses self-talk a lot (Auditory digital). “I
think I know what you mean.” “I sense there is a
misunderstanding here.”
When creating your metaphor then, feed these types of words back to your client.
Keep the language positive and avoid clichés.
You can also use embedded quotes by having one character in the story say something to another
character in the story, for example: “Just listen to what I have to say.”
If you feel your client might have a question about what you are saying, then actually include that
question in your story; and then answer it as well.
The metaphorical story can be constructed around any interesting theme, and the further away it is
removed from the client’s actual story, the better it works. Sports, hobbies, story books and even
movies are themes that can be incorporated successfully when creating your metaphor.
A great way to hide your therapeutic metaphor even further from the client’s conscious awareness is to
add filler details or fluff. In other words, adding elements of the weather and other seemingly
insignificant details to your story will lessen the directness of the metaphor.
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A subtlety I employ when using a metaphor is to remain still for moment, seemingly contemplating what
has been said. I then use specific language patterns designed to give the impression of being ‘psychic’. I
say something like: “Ok, right now I feel I have to tell you a story”, or “Ok, I’m picking up something and
need to tell you this…” and then launch into the metaphor. When saying something like that, I’m
implying that what I’m about to say next is coming from somewhere other than me. I don’t say where
it’s coming from however – I leave that to the client’s own belief system to fill in the blanks.
These kinds of sentences also give me the lead-in into telling the story that otherwise might seem out of
place or even contrived during a formal reading.
Likewise, another way to lead into your metaphor is to use what NLP calls ‘quotes’, for instance, “That’s
interesting. The other day I was chatting to this woman, her name is Sally, and she told me the story
of…” This allows you to begin the story by quoting someone else.
You can also combine these lead-ins with the turning of a tarot card. As you look at the card (or the
palm), begin saying something like, “That’s interesting. This card reminds me of the other day when this
woman, her name is Sally, told me the story of…”
Here’s another way to make it easier to construct the metaphor. Consider the main points in the client’s
story. Imagine the frustration or anxiety caused by the problem, and begin to imagine someone else
who might be in a similar situation, feeling similar frustrations. Of course the client will easily see
through this new character that you create should you begin telling your story now… so imagine instead
perhaps a type of animal in a similar situation. Again, although a bit more removed from the client, this
might still seem a bit too obvious, so instead imagine an inanimate object having a similar problem. Now
add details to this inanimate object giving it substance. Present its problem; ending with a viable
solution.
Initially you will have to think very fast on your feet, but as time goes by you will quickly be able to sum
up the gist of the client’s situation and tell an appropriate story that the client’s subconscious can relate
to. It happens more and more often that as the client is speaking to me an image from a story that
would be appropriate to the situation pops into my mind.
Let’s take a look at the example on the following page to see how a metaphor can be created and
delivered during an actual reading.
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Suppose someone comes to you for a reading regarding a possible career change. For the sake of the
example we’ll call her Alice. Alice is just starting out as the editor for the local newspaper, after being a
part-time reporter for about 6 months. It’s a small publication so there isn’t much stress and the pay is
pretty good. The problem is though that as soon as she had made the decision to take the position of
editor, another opportunity had come her way… something that she had always wanted to do and had
wanted for a very long time. However, there is no security in this new opportunity at this time… the job
might last a week or a month or a couple of years. Alice wants to know what she should do.
One way I could advise Alice is to tell her the story of The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. (I have just
recently enjoyed listening to an audio version of the book, and am currently heavily influenced by its
central ideas once again.)
So I relay to Alice the happiness and complacency the shepherd experienced while tending his flocks,
and how a dream eventually led him away from that security to an adventure he would never have
dreamed possible. I tell her of the people he met along the way, how he learned to follow the omens,
how he found love where he least expected it, and how he came to the end of his journey only to realize
that that destination was not the end. I tell her of the trials and challenges he encountered along the
way, and how somehow he always prevailed. I tell her how he had returned to the place where he had
started from to find his treasure; and that along the way he had found something far more valuable. I
then tell her to look for the omens, and that whatever she decides to do it would be ok. I could even
suggest she read the book herself and hope that she too would become just as inspired.
The above is not a therapeutic metaphor in the strictest sense, but within the context of a reading it
works just fine. In fact, I’m sure you’ll agree that the same effect can be had when reading the
symbolism found on a tarot card… that the client automatically superimposes themselves onto that
symbolism, and realizes the metaphor intuitively.
Please see the resources page on my website for links to a great collection of metaphors that you can
use.
Side Note:
The Inner Child Deck is another beautiful tarot deck that uses well-known fairy tales and stories
from our childhood to teach essential truths during a reading.
"Fairy stories, told and retold, enrich the depths of our hearts from which our hopes and ideals are
born," the authors explain. “The best thing about these cards is you don't really have to be a tarot
reader to use them. Almost everyone knows these stories, even children, and can therefore make
use of the symbology.”
See my website for more information.
We didn't have metaphors in my day. We didn't beat around the bush.
-Fred Truman
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The User-Friendly Healing Session
As you give more and more readings your intuition and sensitivity are bound to expand. You’ll become
more in tune; and in fact even more accurate with discerning what your client’s needs are, and will be
able to tell them exactly what they need to hear.
Sometimes however, this sensitivity is rightfully perceived as sympathetically understanding your client,
which can lead to them becoming emotional and tearful… if only for the fact that someone finally
understands what they’re going through!
When this show of emotions occurs, it can be unsettling to some. Do you let them cry? Do you try and
stop the tears by saying everything will be alright? Or do you simply look away not knowing what to do?
One of the simplest tools to use in such a situation, what we’ll refer to here as a healing session, is to
work with the client’s awareness of their breath… meaning, specifically, deep breathing.
Tears and crying are ok by the way. In my opinion it’s ok to let them cry if they need, just so that those
pent up emotions are released from the body and psyche. So allow it take place naturally without
stopping it, and then when you feel the moment is right, gently suggest the following simple exercise.
You say something like this:
“It’s ok. Just close your eyes for a moment. Now take a deep breath and let it out slowly.”
Take a deep and softly audible breath yourself, establishing the rhythm, and let it out slowly. Continue:
“Take another. Inhale slowly through your nostrils to the count of four, allowing the breath to fill up from
your abdomen… and when you feel full, just let the breath escape from your nostrils again, counting at
the same rhythm… 1, 2, 3, 4. That’s right. Now take another deep breath. There… feeling better?”
Repeat this deep abdominal breathing as needed.
As simple as this may sound, taking slow deep breaths with complete awareness benefits you in so many
ways; including calming your nervous system with immediate effect. It’s the perfect way to calm an
emotional client.
You can enhance this exercise further by suggesting your client – while their eyes are closed – visualizes
a soft, warm glow coming over them. Turning their attention to their heart area, and even just
pretending to breathe from this area, enhances this experience even more. (If this last bit is too much
for your personal belief system, simply ask them to focus on their heart area as they breathe. Or just
pretend that you’re OK with it.)
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By the way, you can also use a simple breathing exercise as a ‘pump up’ for those times that you feel
nervous: Take a deep, audible breath in through the nostrils, and direct the breath down to your
abdomen. Wait till your abdomen expands with the breath, and then let it escape at the same rate. The
intake and exhalation should both be slightly forceful (but don’t hyperventilate). Let the breath come
and go smoothly in waves, as opposed to sharp peaks and dips. You should begin to feel a warmth
spreading through your abdomen. Four or five of these breathes will change your nervous state, and will
cultivate a mood of focus and determination.
Side Note:
Heartmath, founded in 1998, is an internationally recognized company dedicated to facilitating
heart-based living – i.e. people relying on the intelligence of their heart in concert with their minds
to improve health, performance, relationships and well-being at home and in the workplace. Their
focus on the alleviation of modern day stress is mirrored in the scientific approach of their topselling biofeedback products, namely the emWave Personal Stress Reliever and the emWave PC
Stress Release System. The focus of these products is the control of inner emotional states through
controlled breathing. This is like yoga without the postures.
Very much like the computer-based game Journey to the Wild Divine that I mentioned earlier,
emWave uses a biofeedback sensor connected to your finger that reads your skin galvanic
response and heart rate/coherence, while you learn to utilize your breath to control on-screen
activities.
In truth Journey to the Wild Divine is more of a training program than a game, giving you instant
feedback as to whether you are breathing correctly or not. One of the benefits of such a program is
that when you learn to control your breathing through interaction with the virtual world, the same
responses are carried over into the real world. Stress is minimized as you learn to deal with it
through controlling your inner state via your breath.
Whereas Journey to the Wild Divine will appeal to those with a sense of fun and gaming,
emWave’s appeal is inclined more towards the medical field.
If you’re interested in such things, other similar products that are available are Healing Rhythms,
and the very portable Stress Eraser, and can be viewed on the resources page.
And don’t be fooled, Journey to the Wild Divine creates quite a challenge at times as you progress
in the program. It takes a lot of focus to control your breath to be able to complete the tasks
presented during the game. Even the noisy monkey chatter brain is required to be stilled! I’ve had
good reactions to both this and the emWave in both party and private consultations.
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Wrapping It Up
I hope that you have gained some valuable ideas and insights from this book; or at the very least I have
reminded you of something small but potent that you might have forgotten.
The ideas in this book are once again simple in essence, but it’s these simple ideas that can make such a
difference to the way you conduct your readings or your psychic parties.
I’d like to thank all the authors and entertainers that have inspired me in creating my psychic parties in
the past – specifically those mentioned above – as well as thank the travelling psychic on the corner (his
Volkswagen van is as colorful as he is, and it was inspiring to see him set-up and ready to read for this
small town!)
And lastly I’d like to thank you once again. Thank you for your emails, your questions, and your support.
Your willingness to be a better entertainer inspires me just the same!
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This template is for the back of the business cards used with Pendulums.