Emotional and Social Development in Middle Childhood Chapter 10, to page 351
Emotional and Social Development in Middle Childhood Chapter 10, to page 351 Erikson’s Theory: Industry versus Inferiority Psychological conflict of middle childhood: industry versus inferiority Resolved positively when children develop a sense of competence at useful skills and tasks Shift from make-believe play to realistic accomplishment in industrialized nations, the beginning of formal schooling marks the transition to middle childhood School entrance brings the beginning of literacy training, which prepares children for a vast array of specialized careers In school, children discover their own and others’ unique capacities, learn the value of division of labor, and develop a sense of moral commitment and responsibility The negative outcome of this stage is inferiority, lack of confidence in the ability to do things well This sense of inadequacy can develop when family life has not prepared children for school life or when teachers and peers destroy children’s feelings of competence and mastery with negative responses Erikson’s sense of industry combines several developments of middle childhood A positive but realistic self-concept, pride in accomplishment, moral responsibility, and cooperative participation with agemates Self-Understanding In middle childhood, children become able to describe themselves in terms of psychological traits, to compare their own characteristics with those of their peers, and to speculate about the causes of their strengths and weaknesses These transformations in self-understanding have a major impact on children’s self-esteem Self-Concept During the school years, children refine their self-concept, organizing their observations of behaviors and internal states into general dispositions (major change occurs between ages 8-11) Ex. 11 year old: “My name is A. I’m a human being. I’m a girl. I’m a truthful person. I’m not pretty. I do so-so at school. I’m a very good cellist. I’m a very good pianist. I’m a little bit tall for my age. I like several boys. I like several girls. I’m old-fashioned. I play tennis. I am a very good swimmer. I try to be helpful. I’m always ready to be friends with anybody. Mostly I’m good, but I lose my temper. I’m not well-liked by some girls and boys. I don’t know if any boys like me or not.” In middle childhood, children tend to emphasize competencies rather than specific behaviors Ex. “I’m a very good pianist.” They can clearly describe their personality, including both positive and negative traits, rather than describing themselves in all-or-none ways Ex. “truthful” but “I lose my temper” Self-Concept School-age children often make social comparisons – judgments of their appearance, abilities, and behavior in relation to those of others Where 4-6 year olds can compare their own performance to that of one peer, older children can compare multiple individuals, including themselves What accounts for these revisions in self-concept? Cognitive development affects the changing structure of self Children are now able to coordinate several aspects of a situation when reasoning about the physical world (ex. Conservation of liquid) In the social realm, they combine typical experiences and behaviors into psychological dispositions, blend positive and negative characteristics, and compare their own characteristics with those of many other peers Self-Concept Another influence on the content of self-concept is feedback from others Sociologist George Mead proposed that a well-organized psychological self emerges when the child adopts a view of the self that resembles others’ attitudes toward the child Perspective-taking skills, especially an improved ability to infer what others are thinking, are crucial for the development of a self-concept based on personality traits As the internalize others’ expectations, children form an ideal self, which they use to evaluate their real self Children increasingly look to more people beyond the family for information about themselves as they enter a wider range of settings in school and community As children move into adolescence self-concept is increasingly vested in feedback from close friends The content of self-concept also varies between cultures and subcultures Recent research shows that in their self-descriptions, U.S. children list more personal attributes, whereas Chinese children list more attributes involving group membership and relationships Development of Self-Esteem Recall that most preschoolers have extremely high self- esteem But at children enter school and receive must more feedback about how well they perform compared with their peers, selfesteem differentiates and also adjusts to a more realistic level Hierarchically Structured Self-Esteem By age 6-7, children have formed at least 4 broad self-esteems – academic, social, and physical/athletic competence, and physical appearance Within each broad category, are more refined categories that become increasingly distinct with age Viewing the self in terms of stable dispositions permits school-age children to combine these self-evaluations into a general psychological image of themselves – an overall sense of self-esteem Self-esteem takes on a hierarchical structure Perceived physical appearance correlates more strongly with overall self-esteem than any other factor Emphasis on appearance, in the media and in society, has major implications for young people’s overall satisfaction with themselves Hierarchy of Self-Esteem (example) General SelfEsteem Academic Competence Language Arts Math Social Competence Other Subjects Relationship with Peers Relationship with Parents Physical/Athletic Competence Outdoor Games Physical Appearance Sports Changes in Level of Self-Esteem Self-Esteem declines during the 1st few years of elementary school as children evaluate themselves in various areas Typically, the drop is not great enough to be harmful Most (but not all) children appraise their characteristics and competencies realistically while maintaining an attitude of selfrespect Then, from 4th grade on, self-esteem rises for the majority of young people, who feel especially good about their peer relationships and athletic capabilities Influences on Self-Esteem From middle childhood on, individual differences in self-esteem become more stable Positive relationships emerge between self-esteem and success at valued activities Ex. Academic self-esteem predicts how important, useful, and enjoyable children judge school subjects to be, their willingness to try hard, and their achievement Ex. Children with high social self-esteem are consistently better-liked by their classmates Ex. Sense of athletic competence is positively associated with investment and performance in sports However, a profile of low self-esteem in all areas is linked to anxiety, depression, and increasing antisocial behavior Influences on Self-Esteem: Culture Cultural forces profoundly affect self-esteem A strong emphasis on social comparison in school may explain why Chinese and Japanese children, despite higher academic achievement, score lower in self-esteem than North American children In Asian classrooms, competition is tough and achievement pressure is high At the same time, because their culture values social harmony, Asian children tend to be reserved about judging themselves positively but generous in their praise of others Gender-stereotyped expectations also affect self-esteem In one study, the more 5-8 year old girls talked with friends about the way people look, watched TV shows focusing on physical appearance, and perceived their friends as valuing thinness, the lower their physical self-esteem and overall self-worth were a year later In academic self-judgments Girls score higher in language arts self-esteem Boys score higher in math, science, and physical/athletic self-esteem, even when children of equal skill levels are compared African American children tend to have slightly higher self-esteem than their Caucasian agemates Possible because of warm, extended families and stronger sense of ethnic pride, which most Caucasians lack Influences on Self-Esteem: ChildRearing Practices Children whose parents use an authoritative child-rearing style feel especially good about themselves Warm, positive parenting lets children know that they are accepted as competent and worthwhile Firm but appropriate expectations, backed up with explanations, help children evaluate their own behavior against reasonable standards Controlling parents (those who too often help or make decisions for their child) communicate a sense of inadequacy to their children Having parents who are repeatedly disapproving and insulting is linked to low self-esteem Children subjected to controlling parenting need constant reassurance, and many rely heavily on peers to affirm their self-worth (which is a risk factor for adjustment difficulties, including aggression and antisocial behavior) Influences on Self-Esteem: ChildRearing Practices Overindulgent parenting is correlated with unrealistically high self-esteem, which also undermines development These children tend to lash out at challenges to their overblown self-images and, thus, are also likely to be hostile and aggressive American cultural values have increasingly emphasized a focus on the self that may lead parents to indulge children and boost their self-esteem too much The self-esteem of U.S. youths rose sharply from the 1970s-1990s, a period in which most popular parenting literature advised promoting children’s selfesteem Yet, compared with previous generations, American youths are achieving less well and displaying more antisocial behavior and other adjustment problems Research has show that children DO NOT benefit from complements (“You’re terrific!) that have no basis in real attainment When children strive for worthwhile goals, achievement fosters self-esteem, which, in turn, promotes good performance Influences on Self-Esteem: Making Achievement-Related Attributions Attributions are our common, everyday explanations for the causes of behavior (our answers to the question “Why did I or another person do that?”) School-age children who are high in academic self-esteem and motivation make mastery-oriented attributions They credit their success to ability (which they can improve through trying hard) and their failures to factors that can be changed, such as insufficient effort Children who develop learned helplessness attribute their failures to ability, but when they succeed, conclude that external factors, such as luck, are responsible They believe that ability is fixed and cannot be changed by trying hard When a task is difficult, these children experience an anxious loss of control, the give up with out really trying Influences on Self-Esteem: Making Achievement-Related Attributions Children’s attributions affect their goals Mastery oriented children Seek information on how best to increase their ability through effort Hence, their performance improves over time Learned helplessness children Focus on obtaining positive and avoiding negative evaluations of their fragile sense of ability Over time, their ability not longer predicts how well they do Because they fail to connect effort with success they do not develop the metacognitive and self-regulatory skills necessary for high achievement Lack of effective learning strategies, reduced persistence, low performance, and a sense of loss of control sustain one another in a vicious cycle Influences on Achievement-Related Attributions Parental communication plays a key role in children’s attributions Learned-helplessness children tend to have parents who believe their child is not very capable and has to work harder to succeed Ex. When the child fails, the parent might say “You can’t do that, can you? It’s OK if you quit.” Ex. After the child succeeds, the parent might give feedback that evaluates the child’s traits, “You’re so smart!” Parents of learned-helplessness children tend to give them feedback in the form of trait statements (“You’re so smart!”) Trait statements promote a fixed view of ability, leading children to question their competence in the face of setbacks and to retreat from challenge Teachers’ messages also affect children’s attributions Teachers who emphasize learning over getting good grades tend to have mastery- oriented students Students with unsupportive teachers tend to regard their performance as externally controlled (ex. by luck or teachers) They withdraw from learning activities and their achievement declines (which lead children to doubt their ability further) Influences on Achievement-Related Attributions For some children performance is especially likely to be undermined by negative adult feedback Despite their higher achievement, girls more often than boys blame their poor performance on ability Girls tend to receive messages from teachers and parents that their ability is at fault with they do not do well, and negative stereotypes (ex. Girls are weak in math) reduce their interest and effort Low-SES ethnic minority students often receive les favorable feedback from teachers Especially when assigned to homogeneous groups of poorly achieving students (which typically results in a drop in academic self-esteem and performance) Cultural values affect the likelihood that children will develop learned helplessness Because of the high value their culture places on effort and self-improvement, Asians pay more attention to failure than to success, because failure indicates were corrective action is needed Americans, in contrast, focus more on success because it enhances self-esteem Fostering a Mastery-Oriented Approach An intervention called attribution retaining encourages learned-helplessness children to believe that they can overcome failure by exerting more effort Children are given tasks difficult enough that they will experience some failure, followed by repeated feedback that helps them revise their attributions – “You can do it if you try harder.” After they succeed, children receive additional feedback – “You’re really good at this.” or “You really tried hard on that one.” – so that they attribute their success to both ability and effort, not chance Another approach is to encourage low-effort children to focus less on grades and more on mastering a task for its own sake Instruction in effective strategies and self-regulation is also vital, to compensate for development lost in this area and to ensure that renewed effort pays off Attribution retaining is best begun early, before children’s views of themselves become hard to change Emotional Development Greater self-awareness and social sensitivity support gains in emotional competence in middle childhood Changes take place in experience of self-conscious emotions, emotional understanding, and emotional self-regulation Self-Conscious Emotions In middle childhood, the self-conscious emotions of pride and guilt become clearly governed by personal responsibility and no longer depend on adult monitoring Children experience pride in new accomplishments and guilt over a transgression, even when no adult is present Also, children no longer report guilt for any mishap, as they did earlier in the preschool years, now they only report guild for intentional wrongdoing, such as lying, ignoring responsibilities, or cheating Pride motivates children to take on challenges Guilt prompts children to make amends and strive for self-improvement Harsh reprimands from adults can lead to intense shame (ex. “Everyone else can do it! Why can’t you?”), which is particularly destructive A shame-induced, sharp drop in self-esteem can trigger withdrawal, depression, and intense anger at those who participated in the shame-evoking situation Emotional Understanding School-age children, unlike preschoolers, are likely to explain emotion by referring to internal states (like happy or sad thoughts) rather than to external events Around age 8, children become aware that they can experience more than one emotion at a time, each of which can be positive or negative and differ in intensity Ex. A child can be happy they got a present from their grandmother, but also sad that it was a sweater and socks rather than the action figure they really wanted Appreciating mixed emotions helps children realize that people’s expressions may not reflect their true feelings, and also fosters awareness of self-conscious emotions Between ages 8-9, they improve sharply in ability to distinguish pride from happiness and surprise They also understand that pride combines 2 sources of happiness (joy in accomplishment and joy that a significant person recognized that accomplishment) They can reconcile contradictory facial and situational cues in figuring out another's feelings and can use information about “what might have happened” to predict how people will feel in a new situation Emotional Understanding As with self-understanding, gains in emotional understanding are supported by cognitive development and social experiences Especially adults’ sensitivity to children’s feelings and willingness to discuss emotions Together, cognitive development and social experience lead to a rise in empathy As children move closer to adolescence, advances in perspective taking permit an empathetic response not just to people’s immediate distress but also to their general life condition Emotional Self-Regulation Rapid gains in emotional self-regulation occur in middle childhood As children engage in social comparison and care more about peer approval, they must learn to manage negative emotion that threatens their self-esteem By age 10, most children are able to shift adaptively between 2 general strategies for managing emotion Problem-centered coping – children appraise the situation as changeable, identify the difficulty, and decide what to so about it If problem solving doesn’t work, they engage in emotion-centered coping – internal, private, and aimed at controlling distress when little can be done about an outcome Ex. When faced with an anxiety-provoking test or an angry friend, older schoolage children view problem solving and seeking social support as the best strategies But when outcomes are beyond their control, like after getting a bad grade on a test, they opt for distraction or try to redefine the situation, “Things could be worse. There’ll be another test.” Emotional Self-Regulation Through interacting with parents, teachers, and peers, school-age children become more knowledgeable about socially approved ways to display negative emotion They increasingly prefer verbal strategies (ex. “Please stop pushing and wait your turn.”) to crying, sulking, or aggression When emotional self-regulation has developed well, children acquire a sense of emotional self-efficacy – a feeling of being in control of their emotional experience This fosters favorable self-image and an optimistic outlook The parents of children who are emotionally well-regulated respond sensitively and helpfully when the child is distressed In contrast, poorly regulated children often experience hostile, dismissive parental reactions to distress and are overwhelmed by negative emotion Understanding Others: Perspective Taking Middle childhood brings major advances in perspective taking – the capacity to imagine what other people may be thinking and feeling These changes support self-concept and self-esteem, understanding of others, and a wide variety of social skills Robert Selman’s 5-stage sequence describes changes in perspective-taking skill Asked children from preschool age through adolescence to respond to social dilemmas in which characters have differing information and opinions about an event At first, children have only a limited idea of what other people might be thinking and feeling, but later become more aware that people can interpret the same event differently Soon, they can reflect on how another person might regard their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior Finally, older children and adolescents can evaluate two people’s perspective simultaneously Children gain in perspective taking as a result of experiences in which adults and peers explain their viewpoints Good perspective takers are more likely to display empathy and sympathy and to handle difficult social situations effectively Children with poor social skills have great difficulty imagining others’ thoughts and feelings and often mistreat others without feeling guilt or remorse Stage Age Range Description Level 0: Undifferentiated perspective taking 3-6 Children recognize that self and others can have different thoughts and feelings, but they frequently confuse the two Level 1: Social-informational 4-9 perspective taking Children understand that different perspectives may result because people have access to different information Level 2: Self-reflective perspective taking 7-12 Children can “step into another person’s shoes” and view their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior from the other person’s perspective and know that others can do the same Level 3: Third-party perspective taking 10-15 Children can step outside a 2-person situation and imagine how the self and other are viewed from the point of view of a 3rd, impartial party Level 4: Societal perspective taking 14-adult Individual understand that 3rd-party perspective taking can be influenced by one or more systems of larger societal values Moral Development Recall that preschoolers pick up many morally relevant behavior through modeling and reinforcement By middle childhood, they have had time to internalize rules for good conduct Ex. “It’s good to help others in trouble.” or “It’s wrong to take something that doesn’t belong to you.” This change leads children to become considerably more independent and trustworthy We have also seen that children do not just copy their morality from others As the cognitive-developmental approach emphasizes, they actively think about right and wrong An expanding social world, the capacity to consider more information when reasoning, and perspective taking lead moral understanding to advance greatly in middle childhood Moral and Social-Conventional Understanding During the school years, children construct a flexible appreciation of moral rules By age 7-8, children no longer believe that all truth-telling is good and ally lying is bad, they also consider prosocial and antisocial intentions The evaluate certain types of truthfulness very negatively (ex. Bluntly telling a classmate that you don’t like her drawing) Comparisons of Chinese and North American children provide evidence that cultural values affect children’s moral judgments about truthfulness and lying Both Chinese and North American children consider lying about antisocial acts “very naughty” Chinese children (influenced by collectivist values) more often rate lying favorably when the intention is modesty Ex. When a student who has thoughtfully picked up litter from the playground says “I didn’t do it.” Similarly, Chinese children are more likely to favor lying to support the group at the expense of the individual Ex. Saying you’re sick if you are a poor singer so you won’t harm your class’s chances of winning a singing competition In contrast, North American children more often favor lying to support the individual at the expense of the group Ex. Claiming that a friend who is a poor speller is actually a good speller because he wants to participate in a spelling competition Moral and Social-Conventional Understanding As their ideas about justice take into account more variables, children begin to clarify and link moral imperatives and social conventions Ex. School-age children distinguish social conventions with a clear purpose (like not running in school hallways to prevent injuries) from ones with no obvious justification (like crossing a “forbidden” line on the playground) With age, they also realize that people’s intentions and contexts of their actions affect the moral implications of violating a social convention In one study, 8-10 year olds stated that because of a flag’s symbolic value, burning it to express disapproval of a country or to start a cooking fire is worse than burning it accidentally But they recognize that flag burning is a form of freedom of expression, and most agreed that it would be acceptable in a country that treated its citizens unfairly Children in Western and non-Western cultures reason similarly about moral and social- conventional concerns When a directive is fair and caring, such as telling children to stop fighting or to share candy, school-age children view it as right, regardless of who states it (a principal, a teacher, or a child with no authority) Even in Korean culture (which places high value on obeying authority) 7-11 year olds negatively evaluate a teacher’s or principal’s order to engage in immoral acts, such as stealing or refusing to share Understanding Individual Rights When children challenge adult authority, they typically do so within the personal domain (choices such as hairstyle, friends, and leisure activities) As their grasp of moral imperatives and social conventions strengthens, so does their conviction that certain choices are up to the individual Ex. A Colombian child demonstrated this defense of personal control when he was asked if a teacher had the right to tell a student where to sit during circle time and, in the absence of a moral reason from the teacher, the child declared “She should be able to sit wherever she wants!” As early as age 6, children view freedom of speech and religion as individuals rights – even if laws exist that deny those rights They also regard laws that discriminate against individuals (such as denying certain people access to healthcare or education) as wrong and worthy of violating Older school-age children place limits on individual choice, and prejudice usually declines in middle childhood Ex. 4th graders faced with conflicting moral and personal concerns – such as whether or not to befriend a new classmate of a different race, gender, or other difference – typically decide in favor of kindness and fairness Understanding Diversity and Inequality By the early school years, children associate power and privilege with white people and poverty and inferior status with other ethnicities They do not necessarily acquire these views directly from parents or friends Rather, they seem to pick up prevailing societal attitudes from implicit messages in the media and elsewhere in their environments In-Group and Out-Group Biases: Development of Prejudice By age 5-7, white children generally evaluate their own racial group more favorably than other peer groups While many minority children of this age evaluate their own group more negatively than the white majority With age, children pay more attention to inner traits and begin to understand that people who look different do not think, feel, or act differently After age 7-8, both majority and minority children express ingroup favoritism, and white children’s prejudice against outgroup members declines In-Group and Out-Group Biases: Development of Prejudice The extent to which children hold racial and ethnic biases depends on several factors A fixed view of personality traits: Children who believe that personality traits are fixed rather than changeable often judge others as either “good” or “bad” They ignore circumstances and readily form prejudices based on limited information Ex. They might infer that “a new child at school who tells a lie to get other kids to like her” is just a bad person Overly high self-esteem: Children (and adults) with overly high self-esteem are more likely to hold racial and ethnic prejudices These individuals seem to belittle individuals or groups to justify their own extremely favorable self-evaluation A social world in which people are sorted into groups: the more adults highlight group distinctions for children and the less interracial contact children experience, the more likely children are to display prejudice Reducing Prejudice Providing opportunities for intergroup contact, especially long-term contact in neighborhoods, schools, and communities, is effective This provides racially and ethnically different children the opportunity to work toward common goals and become personally acquainted Classrooms that expose children to ethnic diversity, teach them to value those differences, directly address the damage caused by prejudice, and encourage perspective taking and empathy both prevent children from forming negative biases and reduce already acquired biases Another approach is to teach children to view others’ traits as changeable Discussing the many possible influences on traits with children The more children believe that people can change their personalities, the more they report liking and perceiving themselves as similar to members of other groups Peer Relations In middle childhood, the society of peers becomes an increasingly important context for development Peer contact contributes to perspective taking and understanding of self and others These developments, in turn, enhance peer interaction Compared with preschoolers, school-age children resolve conflicts more effectively, using persuasion and compromise Sharing, helping, and other prosocial acts increase Aggression declines, especially physical attacks But, verbal and relational aggression continue as children form peer groups Peer Groups By the end of middle childhood, children form peer groups – collectives that generate unique values and standards for behavior and social structure of leaders and followers Peer groups organize on the basis of proximity (being in the same classroom) and similarity in sex, ethnicity, popularity, and aggression The “peer culture” of a peer group typically consists of a specialized vocabulary, dress code, and place to “hang out” Children who violate the codes of dress and behavior that grow out of peer groups are often “rebuffed” becoming targets of critical glances and comments Within the peer group, children acquire many social skills, including cooperation and leadership When children who are no longer “respected” are excluded from groups, they may turn to other low-status peers for group belonging Thereby reducing their opportunities to learn social competent behavior Desire for group membership can also be satisfied through formal groups, such as scouts and religious youth groups Of course, adult involvement can hold negative behaviors in check in children’s formal and informal peer groups Friendships Whereas peer groups provide children with insight into larger social structures, friendships contribute to the development of trust and sensitivity During the school years, friendships becomes more complex and psychologically based Ex. A quote from an 8 year old: “Why is Shelly your best friend? Because she helps me when I’m sad, and she shares…What makes Shelly so special? I’ve known her longer, I sit next to her and got to know her better… How come you like Shelly better than anyone else? She’s done the most for me. She never disagrees, she never eats in front of me, she never walks away when I’m crying, and she helps me with my homework. .. How do you get someone to like you? If you’re nice to [your friends], they’ll be nice to you.” Friendships As these responses show, friendship has become a mutually agreed-on relationship in which children like each other’s personal qualities and respond to one another’s needs and desires Once a friendship forms, trust becomes its defining feature School age children state that a good friendship is based on acts of kindness that signify that each person can be counted on to support the other Consequently, older children regard violations of trust, such as not helping when others need help, breaking promises, and gossiping behind the other’s back, as serious breaches of friendship Because of these feathers, school-age children’s friendships are more selective Whereas preschoolers say they have lots of friends, by age 8-9, children name only a few good friends Girls, who demand greater closeness than boys, are more exclusive in their friendships Friendships Children tend to choose friends who are similar to themselves in age, sex, race, ethnicity, and SES, as well as in personality, popularity, academic achievement, and prosocial behavior Yet, friendship opportunities offered by children’s environments also affect their choices In integrated classrooms with mixed-race collaborative learning groups, students form more cross-race friendships Over middle childhood, friendships remain fairly stable (about 50- 70% enduring over a school year, and some for several years) Through friendships, children come to realize that close friendships can survive disagreements if friends are secure in their liking for one another Which helps them learn to tolerate criticism and resolve disputes Friendships The impact of friendships on children’s development depends on the nature of their friends Children who bring kindness and compassion to their friendships strengthen each other’s prosocial tendencies and form more lasting ties When aggressive children make friends, the relationship is often riddled with hostile interaction and is at risk for breakup, especially if only one member of the pair is aggressive Aggressive girls’ friendships are high in exchange of private feelings but full of jealousy, conflict, and betrayal Aggressive boys’ friendships involve frequent expressions of anger, coercive statements, physical attacks, and enticements to rulebreaking behavior Peer Acceptance Peer acceptance refers to likability – the extent to which a child is viewed by a group of agemates as a worthy social partner Unlike friendship, likability is not a mutual relationship but is a one-sided perspective, involving the group’s view of an individual Certain social skills that contribute to friendship enhance peer acceptance Better accepted children tend to have more friends and more positive relationships with them To measure peer acceptance, researchers usually use self-reports that measure social preferences or social prominence Ex. Social preferences: asking children to identify classmates whom the “like very much” or “like very little” Ex. Social prominence: children’s judgments of whom most of their classmates admire Peer Acceptance Children’s self-reports reveal 4 broad categories of social acceptance Popular children: receive many positive votes (are well-liked) Rejected children: get many negative votes (are disliked) Controversial children: receive many votes, both positive and negative Neglected children: are seldom chosen, either positively or negatively About 2/3 of pupils in typical elementary school classrooms fit one of these categories The remaining1/3 are average in peer acceptance and do not receive extreme scores Peer Acceptance Peer acceptance is a powerful predictor of psychological adjustment Rejected children are anxious, unhappy, disruptive, and low in self-esteem Both teachers and parents rate them as having a wide range of emotional and social problems Peer rejection in middle childhood is strongly associated with poor school performance, absenteeism, dropping out, substance use, depression, antisocial behavior, and delinquency in adolescence and with criminality in early adulthood Earlier influences, such as parenting practices and family stress, may largely explain the link between per acceptance and adjustment School-age children with peer-relationship problems are more likely to have experienced family stress due to low income, insensitive child rearing, and coercive discipline Also, rejected children evoke reactions from peers that contribute to their unfavorable development Determinants of Peer Acceptance Why is one child liked while another is rejected? A wealth of research shows that social behavior plays a powerful role Determinants of Peer Acceptance: Popular Children Popular-prosocial children – usually combine academic and social competence They perform well in school and communicating with peers in sensitive, friendly, and cooperative ways Popular-antisocial children – may be “tough” boys who are athletically skilled but are poor students who cause trouble and defy adult authority, or relationally aggressive boys and girls who ignore, exclude, and spread rumors about other children as a way of enhancing their own status Despite their aggressiveness, peers view these youths as “cool,” perhaps because of their athletic ability and sophisticated but devious social skills Although peer admiration gives these children some protection against lasting adjustment difficulties, their antisocial acts require intervention With age, peers like these high-status, aggressive peers less and less This trend is stronger for relationally aggressive girls The more socially prominent and controlling these girls become, the more they engage in relational aggression Eventually peers condemn their nasty tactics and reject them Determinants of Peer Acceptance: Rejected Children Rejected-aggressive children – the largest subtype of rejected children, show high rates of conflict, physical and relational aggression, and hyperactive and impulsive behavior Are also deficient in perspective taking and emotion regulation Ex. They tend to misinterpret the innocent behaviors of peers as hostile and to blame others for their social difficulties Compared with popular-aggressive children, they are more extremely antagonistic Rejected-withdrawn children – are passive, socially awkward, and overwhelmed by social anxiety They hold negative expectations for treatment by peers, and worry about being scorned and attacked Rejected children are excluded as early as kindergarten Soon their classroom participation declines, their feelings of loneliness rise, and their academic achievement falters, and they want to avoid school Rejected children generally have few or not friends, which results in severe adjustment difficulties Both types of rejected children are at risk for peer harassment Rejected –aggressive children also act as bullies Rejected-withdrawn children are especially likely to be victimized Determinants of Peer Acceptance: Controversial & Neglected Children Controversial children display both positive and negative social behaviors, engendering mixed peer opinion They are hostile and disruptive, but they also engage in positive, prosocial acts Though they have friends, they often bully others and engage in calculated relational aggression to maintain their dominance Neglected children, once thought to be in need of treatment, are usually just as socially skilled as average children They do not report feeling lonely or unhappy, and when they want to, they can break away from their usual pattern of playing by themselves These children remind us that an outgoing, gregarious personality style is not the only path to emotional wellbeing Helping Rejected Children Most interventions to help rejected children involve coaching, modeling, and reinforcing positive social skills Such as how to initiate interaction with a peer, cooperate in play, and respond to another child with friendly emotion and approval The most effective programs combine social-skills training with other treatments Rejected children are often poor students, whose low academic self-esteem magnifies negative reactions to teachers and classmates Intensive academic tutoring improves both school achievement and social acceptance Rejected children need help attributing their peer difficulties to internal, changeable causes If socially incompetent behaviors originate in harsh, intrusive, authoritarian parenting, interventions that focus on the child-parent interaction may be needed If parent-child interaction does not change, children may soon return to their old behavior patterns Gender Typing Children’s understanding of gender roles broadens in middle childhood And, their gender identities (views of themselves as relatively masculine or feminine) change as well Development differs for girls and boys, and it can vary considerably across cultures Gender-Stereotyped Beliefs Gender stereotyping of personality traits increases steadily in middle childhood, and is adultlike by age 11 Ex. Children regard “tough,” “aggressive,” “rational,” and “dominant” as masculine and “gentle,” “sympathetic,” and “dependent” as feminine Children make these distinctions on the basis f observed sex differences in behavior and of differential adult treatment of boys and girls When helping a child with a task, parents (especially fathers) behave in a more mastery-oriented fashion with sons, setting higher standards, explaining concepts, and pointing out important features of tasks (particularly during gender-typed tasks such as science activities) Parents less often encourage girls to make their own decisions Parents and teachers more often praise boys for knowledge and accomplishment and girls for obedience Gender-Stereotyped Beliefs School-age children consider certain academic subjects as feminine and others as masculine They often regard reading, spelling, art, and music as more for girls and mathematics, athletics, and mechanical skills are more for boys These attitudes influence children’s preferences for and sense of competence at certain subjects Ex. Boys tend to feel more competent than girls at math and science, whereas girls feel more competent than boys as language arts (even when children of equal skill level are compared) Although school-age children are aware of many stereotypes, they also develop a more open- minded view of what males and females can do The ability to classify flexibly underlies this change They realize that a person can belong to more than one social category (ex. One can be a “boy” yet “like to play house”) By the end of middle childhood, children regard gender typing as socially rather than biologically influenced But, acknowledging that people can cross gender lines does not mean they always approve of doing so They take a harsh view of certain violations (ex. Boys playing with dolls and wearing girls’ clothing, girls acting noisily and roughly) They are especially intolerant when boys engage in “cross-gender” acts, which children regard as nearly as bad as moral transgressions Gender Identity and Behavior From 3rd-6th grade, boys strengthen their identification with “masculine” personality traits While girls’ identification with “feminine” traits declines Compared with boys, who usually stick to “masculine” pursuits, girls begin to experiment with a wider range of options and more often consider traditionally male future work roles These changes reflect a mixture of cognitive and social forces School-age children are aware that society attaches greater prestige to “masculine” characteristics Parents, especially fathers, are more tolerant of girls than boys crossing gender lines A tomboyish girl can make her way into boys’ activities without losing the approval of her female peers, but a boy who hangs out with girls is likely to be ridiculed and rejected Gender Identity and Behavior As children make social comparisons and characterize themselves in terms of stable dispositions, gender identity expands to include selfevaluations, which greatly affect adjustment Gender typicality – the degree to which the child feels similar to others of the same gender Although children don’t need to by highly gender-typed to view themselves as gender-typical, their psychological well-being depends, to some degree, on feeling that they “fit in” with their same-sex peers Gender contentedness – the degree to which the child feels satisfied with his or her gender assignment, which also promotes happiness Felt pressure to conform to gender roles – the degree to which the child feels parents and peers disapprove of his or her gender-related traits Because such pressure reduces the likelihood that children will explore options related to their interests and talents, children who feel strong gender-typed pressure are often distressed Gender Identity and Behavior How children feel about themselves in relations to their gender group becomes vitally important in middle childhood Those who experience rejection because of their gender-atypical traits suffer profoundly Currently, researchers and therapists are debating how best to help children who feel gender-atypical Some experts advocate using therapy to make gender-atypical children more gender-typical Through therapy and reinforces children for engaging in traditional gender-role activities so they will feel more compatible with same-sex peers Others oppose this approach on grounds that it is likely to heighten felt pressure to conform (which predicts maladjustment) And for children who fail to “change” this may result in parental rejection These experts advocate intervening with parents and peers to help them become more accepting of children’s gender-atypical interests and behaviors Family Influences As children move into school, peer, and community contexts, the parent-child relationships change At the same time, children’s well-being continues to depend on the quality of family interaction Contemporary changes in families (high rates of divorce, remarriage, and maternal employment) can have positive and negative effects on children Parent-Child Relationships In middle childhood, the amount of time children spend with parents declines dramatically, and the child’s growing independence means that parents must deal with new issues Ex. How many chores to assign, how much allowance to give, whether their friends are good influences, what to do about problems in school, keeping track of children when they’re out, or even when they’re home and the parent isn’t there to see what’s going on Child rearing becomes easier for parents who established an authoritative style in the early years Reasoning is more effective with school-age children because of their greater capacity for logical thinking and their increased respect for parents’ greater knowledge Effective parents engage in Coregulation – a form of supervision in which parents exercise general oversight while permitting children to be in charge of moment-to-moment decision making Grows out of cooperative relationship between parent and child and prepares the child for the greater freedom of adolescence Parents must guide and monitor from a distance and effectively communicated expectations when they are with their children Children must inform parents of their whereabouts, activities, and problems so parents can intervene when necessary Parent-Child Relationships Parents tend to devote more time to children of their own sex In parents’ separate activities with children, mothers are more concerned with caregiving and ensuring that children meet responsibilities in homework, after-school activities, and chores Fathers, especially those with sons, focus on achievement-related and recreational pursuits But, when both parents are present, fathers engage in as much caregiving as mothers Although school-age children often press for greater independence, they know how much they need their parents’ continuing support In one study, 5th and 6th graders described parents as the most influential people in their lives The often turned to mothers and fathers for affection, advice, enhancement of self-worth, and assistance with everyday problems Siblings Siblings are important sources of support for school-age children However, sibling rivalry increases in middle childhood As children participate in a wider range of activities, parents often compare siblings’ traits and accomplishments The child who gets less parental affection, more disapproval, or fewer maternal resources is likely to be resentful For same-sex siblings who are close in age, parental comparisons are more frequent, resulting in more quarreling and antagonism and poorer adjustment This effect is particularly strong when parents are under stress; parents whose energies are drained are less careful about being fair To reduce rivalry, siblings often strive to be different from one another, thereby shaping important aspects of each other’s development Ex. 2 brothers may deliberately choose different athletic pursuits and musical instruments, and if the older one does especially well at an activity, the younger one may not want to try it Parents can limit these effects by making an effort not to compare children, but some feedback about their competencies is inevitable Although conflict rises, school-age siblings continue to rely on each other for companionship and assistance But for siblings to reap these benefits, parental encouragement of warm, considerate sibling ties is vital Only Children Sibling relationships are not essential for healthy development Contrary to popular belief, only children are not spoiled, and in some respects, they are advantaged U.S. children growing up in one-child and multichild families do not differ in self-rated personality traits And, compared to children with siblings, only children are higher in selfesteem and achievement motivation, do better in school, and attain higher levels of educations One reason for this may be that only children have somewhat closer relationships with parents Parents may exert more pressure for mastery and accomplishment However, only children tend to be less well-accepted in peer groups Perhaps because they have not had opportunities to practice conflict resolution skills with siblings Only Children Favorable development also characterizes only children in China, where a “one-child-only” policy has been strictly enforced in urban areas for more than 20 years, to control population growth Compared with agemates who have siblings, Chinese only children are advanced in cognitive development and academic achievement They also feel more emotionally secure, maybe because government disapproval promotes tension in families with more than one child Chinese mothers usually ensure that their children have regular contact with 1st cousins (who are considered siblings) Perhaps as a result, Chinese only children do not differ from agemates with siblings in social skills and peer acceptance However, the next generation of Chinese only children will have no 1st cousins Divorce Currently, the divorce rate in the U.S. is the highest in the world, and of 45% of American marriages that end in divorce, half involve children ¼ of American children live in single-parent households, most with their mothers But, single father households have increased steadily to about 12% Children of divorce spend an average of 5 years in a single-parent home (almost 1/3 of their childhood) About 2/3 of divorced parents marry again, and ½ of their children eventually experience the end of their parents’ 2nd marriage Divorce is not a single event in the lives of parents and children It is a transition that leads to a variety of new living arrangements, accompanied by changes in housing, income, and family roles and responsibilities Although many studies have reported that marital breakup is stressful for children, great individual differences exist in how well children fare Impact on children involves many factors including: the custodial parent’s psychological health, the child’s characteristics, and social supports within the family and surrounding community Divorce: Immediate Consequences In newly divorced households, family conflict often rises Mother-headed households typically experience a sharp drop in income The majority of single mothers with young children live in poverty, getting less than the full amount of child support from the absent father or none at all They often move to lower-cost housing, reducing supportive ties to neighbors and friends The transition from marriage to divorce typically leads to high maternal stress, depression, and anxiety and to a disorganized family situation Ex. Meals and bedtimes may occur at all hours, the house may not get cleaned, and children may no longer go on weekend outings As children react with distress and anger to their less secure home lives, discipline may become harsh and inconsistent Contact with noncustodial fathers often decreases over time Fathers who see their children only occasionally may be permissive, making the mother’s task even harder The more parents argue and fail to provide children with warmth, involvement, and consistent guidance, the poorer children’s adjustment About 20-25% of children in divorced families display severe problems, compared with about 10% in nondivorced families At the same time, reactions vary with children’s age, temperament, and sex Divorce: Children’s Age Younger children often blame themselves for a marital breakup and fear abandonment by both parents Older children can understand that they are not responsible for their parents’ divorce But they may still react strongly, declining in school performance, becoming unruly, and escaping into undesirable peer activities, especially when family conflict is high and supervision is low The oldest children in a family may display more mature behavior, such as willingly taking on extra family and household tasks as well as emotional support of a depressed, anxious mother But, they may become resentful when the demands are too great Divorce: Children’s Temperament and Sex When temperamentally difficult children are exposed to stressful life events and inadequate parenting, their problems are magnified Easy children are less often then targets of parental anger and also cope more effectively with adversity Girls sometimes respond to divorce with internalizing reactions such as crying and withdrawal More often, children of both sexes show demanding and attention-getting behavior In mother-custody families, boys experience more serious adjustment problems Boys are more active and noncompliant in general, and these behaviors increase with exposure to parental conflict and inconsistent discipline Coercive maternal behavior and defiance on the part of sons are common in divorcing households Maybe because of their unruly behavior, boys receive less emotional support from mothers, teachers, and peers Their coercive interactions with their mothers soon spread to their siblings relationships In general, children who are challenging to rear get worse after divorce Divorce: Long-Term Consequences Most children show improved adjustment by 2 years after divorce But, overall, continue to show slightly lower academic achievement, self-esteem, and social competence and emotional adjustment Children with difficult temperaments are especially likely to drop out of school, be depressed, and display antisocial behavior Divorce is linked to problems with adolescent sexuality and development of intimate ties Young people who experienced divorce (especially more than once) display higher rates of early sexuality and adolescent parenthood Some experience other lasting difficulties, such as reduced educational attainment, troubled romantic relationships and marriages, divorce in adulthood, and unsatisfying parent-child relationships The overriding factor in positive adjustment following divorce is effective parenting Shielding the child from family conflict and using authoritative child rearing Divorce: Long-Term Consequences Contact with fathers is important in mother-custody situations The more paternal contact and the warmer the father-child relationship, the less children react with defiance and aggression For girls, a good father-child relationships protects against early sexual activity and unhappy romantic involvements For boys, it seems to affect overall psychological well-being In fact, several studies indicate that outcomes for sons are better when the father is the custodial parent Fathers’ greater economic security and image of authority seem to help them engage in effective parenting with sons And boys in father-custody families may benefit from greater involvement of both parents because noncustodial mothers participate more than noncustodial fathers Although, divorce is painful for children, remaining in an intact but high-conflict family is worse for children than making the transition to a low-conflict, singleparent household Divorcing parents who set aside their disagreements and support each other in their child-rearing roles greatly improve their children’s chances of growing up competent, stable, and happy Caring extended-family members, teachers, siblings, and friends also reduce the likelihood that divorce will result in long-term difficulties Divorce Mediation, Joint Custody, and Child Support Awareness that divorce is highly stressful for children and families has led to community-based services aimed at helping them through this difficult time Divorce mediation – a series of meetings between divorcing adults and a trained professional aimed at reducing family conflict, including battles over property division and child custody An increasingly common custody option is joint custody – which grants both parents equal say in important decisions about the child’s upbringing In most cases, children reside with one parent and see the other on a fixed schedule In other cases, parents share physical custody, and children move between homes and sometimes schools and peer groups Regardless of living arrangements, children in joint custody situations tend to be better adjusted than children in sole-maternal-custody homes Many single-parent families depend on child support from the noncustodial parent to relieve financial strain All states have procedures for withholding wages from parents who fail to make child-support payments Although child support is usually not enough to life a single-parent family out of poverty, it can ease its burdens substantially Noncustodial fathers who have generous visitation schedules and who often see their children are more likely to pay child support regularly Blended Families A blended, or reconstituted family, is a family structure resulting from remarriage of a divorced parent that includes parent, child, and new steprelatives For some children, this expanded family network is positive, bringing more adult attention But most children have more problems than children in stable, first-marriage families Switching to stepparents’ new rules and expectations can be stressful, and children often view steprelatives as intruders How well children adapts is, again, related to the quality of family functioning Depends on which parent forms a new relationship, the child’s age and sex, and the complexity of blended-family relationships Older children and girls seem to have the hardest time Mother-Stepfather Families This arrangement is the most common because mothers generally retain custody of children Boys usually adjust quickly if the stepfather is warm, refrains from exerting his authority too quickly, and offers relief from coercive cycles of mother-son interaction Stepfathers who marry, rather than just cohabitating, are more involved in parenting Maybe because men who choose to marry a mother with children are more interested and skilled at child rearing Girls often react with sulky, resistant behavior Stepfathers may disrupt the close ties many girls have established with their mothers Older school-age children and adolescents of both sexes find it harder to adjust to blended families They often display more irresponsible, acting-out behavior than their peers not in blended families Some stepparents are more involved with their biological children than their stepchildren and older school-age children and adolescents are more likely to notice and challenge unfair treatment Adolescents often view the new stepparent as a threat to their freedom, especially if they experienced little parental monitoring in the single-parent family Father-Stepmother Families When fathers have custody, children typically react negatively to remarriage One reason is that children living with fathers often start out with more problems Perhaps the biological mother could no longer handle the difficult child (usually a boy) so the father and his new partner are faced with a youngster who has behavior problems In other instances, the father has custody because of a very close relationship with the child, and his remarriage disrupts this bond Girls especially have a hard time getting along with their stepmothers Either because the remarriage threatens the girl’s bond with her father or because she becomes entangled in loyalty conflicts between her two mother figures But, the longer girls live in father-stepmother households, the more positive their interaction with stepmothers becomes With time and patience most girls benefit from the support of a second mother figure Support for Blended Families Family life education and therapy can help parents and children adapt to the complexities of living in a blended family Effective approaches encourage stepparents to move into their new roles gradually by first building a warm relationship with the child Counselors can help couples form a cooperative “parenting coalition” to limit loyalty conflicts and provide consistency in child rearing This allows children to benefit from the increased diversity that stepparent relationships bring to their lives The divorce rate for second marriages is even higher than for first marriages Parents with antisocial tendencies and poor child-rearing skills are particularly likely to have several divorces and remarriages The more marital transitions children experience, the greater their difficulties These families usually require prolonged, intensive therapy Maternal Employment and Child Development Children of mothers who enjoy their work and remain committed to parenting show favorable adjustment including higher self-esteem, more positive family and peer relations, less gender-stereotyped beliefs, and better grades in school Girls, especially, profit from the image of female competence Regardless of SES, daughters of employed mothers perceive women’s roles as involving more freedom of choice and satisfaction and are more achievement and career-oriented Employed mothers who value their parenting role are more likely to use authoritative child rearing and coregulation Fathers in dual-earner households often take on greater child-rearing responsibilities Paternal involvement is associated with higher achievement and more mature social behavior When the mother’s employment is overly stressful, children are at risk for ineffective parenting: reduced parental sensitivity, fewer joint parent-child activities, and poorer cognitive development in children throughout childhood and adolescence Especially when low-SES mothers spend long hours at low-paying, physically exhausting jobs Part-time employment and flexible work schedules are associated with good child adjustment Support for Employed Parents and Their Families In dual-earner families, the husband’s willingness to share household responsibilities is crucial If he helps little or not at all, the mother carries a double load, at home and at work, leading to fatigue, distress, and little time and energy for children Assistance from work settings and communities is needed in dual- earner families Such as part-time employment, flexible schedules, and job sharing, and paid leave when children are sick helps parents juggle the demands of work and child rearing Equal pay and employment opportunities for women are also important Because these policies enhance financial status and morale, they improve the way mothers feel and behave when they arrive home at the end of the working day Child Care for School-Age Children High-quality child care is vital for parents’ peace of mind and children’s well-being, even in middle childhood Self-care children are the estimated 7 million 5-13 year olds in the U.S. who are without adult supervision for some period of time after school Some studies report that self-care children suffer from adjustment problems, whereas others show no such effects Children’s maturity and the way they spend their time seem to explain these contradictions Among younger school-age children, those who spend more hours alone have more emotional and social difficulties Older self-care children who have a history of authoritative child rearing, are monitored by telephone calls, and have regular after-school chores appear responsible and well adjusted In contrast, children left to their own devices are more likely to bend to peer pressures Before age 8-9, most children need supervision because they are not yet competent to handle emergencies Attending after-school programs with well-trained staffs, generous adult-child ratios, and skill-building activities is linked to better adjustment Low-SES children who participate in “after-care” enrichment activities show special benefits Ex. Scouting, music and art lessons, clubs, sports, etc.
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