Asperger’s Syndrome: From Diagnosis By Dr Tony Attwood ASPERGER’S SYNDROME The information contained in this booklet was most generously provided to Autism South Africa by the UK National Autistic Society The production and printing of this and 11 other brochures was made possible purely through exceptionally generous sponsorship from The D G Murray Trust This brochure is overseen and distributed by Autism South Africa Brochure Design By Dizenyo Design PAGE 2 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME BY DR TONY ATTWOOD Sometimes the best presents come in small packages and although this is a relatively small book on Asperger’s Syndrome, it will be an invaluable gift for parents, grandparents and other family members. This guide will be a source of information and inspiration, providing explanations to understand and strategies to encourage a child who has recently been diagnosed as having Asperger’s Syndrome. The words of wisdom in this guide will help you recognise that the world can be perceived through different, not defective, eyes. PAGE 3 I would like to thank my supervisor, Oonagh Nugent, for her continuous support and encouragement. We also want to thank the children who inspired this book and all the parents who gave such valuable comments. Our gratitude to the Department of Health, Social Services and Public Safety in Northern Ireland, who awarded funding for the development of this book through its cash grant scheme. Finally thanks to all our colleagues in the Clinical Psychology Department of the former Down Lisburn Health and Social Services Trust for their help and advice. ASPERGER’S SYNDROME INTRODUCTION If you are reading this booklet you are probably a parent whose child has been diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. Whoever you are, I hope this booklet will help you to understand Asperger’s Syndrome and what life may be like for your child. We know that all children are individuals who are born with their own unique personality, range of abilities, strengths and limitations. The child with Asperger’s Syndrome is no different; he or she is an individual with his or her own unique patterns of strengths and abilities. Regardless of having a diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome, your child is still the same person that you have known and loved from birth. Though you may not be an expert on this condition, you are an expert on your own child. As with any child, what works with one may not work with another. Through trial and error you have come to know what works and what does not work for him or her. You may be the greatest resource that your child has. As well as being his or her best friend you may need to be his/her main advocate, supporter and teacher. The aim of this book is to help you understand more about Asperger’s Syndrome and also to help you to focus on your child’s strengths; in this way you can find solutions that work for your child and help promote positive self-esteem. Many of the difficulties that face children with Asperger’s and their parents can be overcome, and with your help your child can lead as full, happy, and successful a life as any other person, reaching his or her fullest potential. In fact some of the most successful people of our time, have had characteristics that would now be consistent with a diagnosis of Asperger’s. While it is recognised that both boys and girls can have Asperger’s Syndrome, it is generally accepted that many more boys present with Asperger’s than girls. The term ‘he’ has been used throughout this booklet for simplicity. The term ‘Asperger’s’ has been used rather than Asperger’s Syndrome. PAGE 4 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME WHAT IS ASPERGER’S SYNDROME? Children with Asperger’s Syndrome typically have difficulty with social interaction and communication and may also have a restricted range of interests and behaviours. This does not mean that your child does not have these skills, just that they may be unusual or limited when compared to others of a similar age. Though there may be differences between children with Asperger’s and children who have Autism, Asperger’s Syndrome is considered to fall within the Autistic Spectrum. A spectrum is a bit like an umbrella. Under this umbrella we find children with varying degrees of difficulty as well as a wide variety of strengths and abilities. Asperger’s sits under this umbrella. PAGE 5 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME WHAT CAUSES ASPERGER’S SYNDROME If you have recently been told that your child has Asperger’s, you may be feeling very mixed up and confused. You may have a lot of questions that you want answers to. One of the first questions parents often ask is what causes Asperger’s. Unfortunately no-one has a definite answer to this question. What is clear is that Asperger’s is not an illness, and your child is not sick. Scientists and researchers believe that Asperger’s is probably a genetic disorder that affects the brain, though they are not sure exactly how. This means that Asperger’s or other Autistic Spectrum Disorders may run in families, and that there is nothing you could have done to prevent your child having Asperger’s. Some parents have said that they feel that they may have somehow contributed to their child’s difficulties. Whilst parents may feel guilty if their child is diagnosed with any difficulty, guilt is rarely helpful to anyone, either you or your child. In fact guilt can often divert energy that could otherwise be used to help your child. CORE DIFFICULTIES (i) Social Interaction & Communication While our knowledge of the cause of Asperger’s remains in its infancy, major advances have been made in recent years in terms of what works for this group of children. We now know that children with Asperger’s have difficulty with social interaction and communication. Social interaction refers to our desire and ability to relate to and mix with other people. This is something that most of us take for granted. We tend to know what to do when we meet other people. In general most of us enjoy meeting people, and talking and laughing with them. We are usually interested in listening to what people have to say and want to exchange information. This type of social interaction comes naturally to many of us. However this is more difficult for children with Asperger’s. PAGE 6 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Communication in social situations does not always come naturally; it can seem strange and unnatural. When we look at it closely, the process of communication is actually quite complex. Faherty (2000) outlines this process as: – putting thoughts into words – getting someone’s attention and saying the words to them – listening to what that person says – thinking about what that person has said – then returning to the first step. Children with Asperger’s often have difficulty with this process. We know that children with Asperger’s have difficulty with social interaction and communication. PAGE 7 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME EXPLAIN SOCIAL RULES: SOLUTIONS MODEL APPROPRIATE SOCIAL BEHAVIOUR: You and your family are your child’s first teachers; he will learn from seeing how you act in different situations. PRACTISE DIFFERENT SITUATIONS WITH YOUR CHILD: Practise different social situations with your child. You could enlist the help of family members to practise conversation in different situations i.e. how to start or end and conversation, how to get someone’s attention or interrupt if necessary. Encourage your child to ask for help when he does not understand what is being asked of him. It is sometimes difficult for children with Asperger’s to admit that they don’t know the answer to a question. Teach phrases such as ‘I don’t understand, could you repeat that?’ Encourage your child to try out the things he has practised in a variety of settings. He might ask for some items in a shop and pay for them or he could try ordering his own food in a restaurant. Explain what is usually expected in social situations i.e. the importance of good manners (please and thank you), not interrupting when people are talking, holding doors open or giving up your seat for an older person. Let your child know that a pause in the conversation usually means that it is time for the other person to speak. Ask your child to listen and think about what the other person is saying, then to think about an answer. Use a visual reminder, perhaps a pencil or small ball, in order to get into the rhythm of turn taking in a conversation e.g. you can only speak when holding the red pencil. Make it fun, by thinking of unusual or exciting situations (e.g. Disneyland or the zoo), as well as the more mundane everyday situations. (e.g. in local shops or church). When things go well praise and encourage your child. Talk through the situation and help your child to see what went well. If things don’t go so well, talk about what they could have done differently. Encourage your child to mix with other children from an early age e.g. brothers, sisters, cousins. PAGE 8 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME See developing appropriate social behaviour as a series of small steps rather than one large goal, this way your child is guaranteed some success. Children with Asperger’s often have a really good memory, so they often remember what has been taught. In today’s society there is considerable emphasis placed on being social, however we must accept that not everyone wants to be the ‘life and soul of the party’, nor should this be imposed on individuals. Children will usually develop in whatever way their personality dictates and this should be accepted and encouraged. Use a visual reminder, perhaps a pencil or small ball, in order to get into the rhythm of turn taking in a conversation e.g. you can only speak holding the red ball. PAGE 9 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME (ii) Friendships Your child may not be interested in making friends or mixing with other children his age, and may appear aloof. Often children with Asperger’s are happiest or more content when playing on their own, particularly if they have a special interest; this may absorb them for hours. However other children with Asperger’s long to have friendships, and are usually painfully aware that they have difficulty in this area. Many are anxious about making friends in case they are rejected or misunderstood. Friendships, when they do exist, can be difficult to maintain. Some children with Asperger’s are only interested in what they have to say, therefore conversations are often one-sided. Some may ask the same question over and over, even when the answer is the same every time. Children with Asperger’s often have difficulty taking turns and may prefer to be the leader rather than the follower. This often puts a strain on relationships with other children. SOLUTIONS Observe your child’s current play skills in as many situations as possible, with as many children as possible. Take note of any errors that you think he is making which may make play less enjoyable for the other child e.g. refusal to compromise, sticking rigidly to rules. TEACH YOUR CHILD PLAY SKILLS Play games with your child. This gives you the chance to model expected behaviour and explain the rules. Encourage your child to take on different roles, e.g. follower as well as leader. Reward your child if he can be a ‘good loser’ as well as a winner occasionally. When your child has mastered the game, try to introduce other people e.g. brothers or sisters. Invite other children to play with your child. In the early stages stay involved so that this is a positive experience for your child. Organise a special treat afterwards so that the other child is keen to repeat the experience. PAGE 10 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Get your child involved in clubs or activities that might interest him. Again it might be better if you remain available in the early stages. You can help by explaining to your child that listening is as important as talking. Encourage him to listen to what other people are saying. Try to encourage friendships with a child who is accepting of your child, perhaps one who has some of the same interests and is kind and understanding. Your child might find it easier to relate to one or two children rather than a group. Birthdays, Christmas, Easter and summer holidays are special times when you can support your child to turn acquaintances into friendships. (iii) Non-Verbal Communication Whether we realise it or not, an enormous amount of our communication is through facial expressions and body language. Most of us are good at reading other people’s facial expressions; we can usually tell when someone is happy or sad, angry or annoyed. We also use body language to guess how another person is feeling, e.g. we know when someone is waving their fist they are probably annoyed. All this makes it easier for us to understand what is going on around us. If we can guess what people are thinking we can explain their behaviour and predict what they might do next. PAGE 11 Your child may have difficulty with this. He may not know instinctively what other people mean by their facial expression or body language, and therefore may not be able to explain behaviour or predict what is going to happen next. SOLUTIONS This is why it is really important to let your child know exactly what you are feeling and thinking. Don’t expect him to ‘mind read’. Give your child this information in words and facial expressions in the first instance. You may need to be very obvious and exaggerate some feelings initially to help your child understand the emotion. You can then practise showing that all emotions are on a scale e.g. slightly irritated to really annoyed. Ask your child to ‘mirror’ or copy your range of emotional expressions. You might give your child marks out of 10 for accuracy. Keep it fun and encourage your child to practise different emotions in front of the mirror. With practice your child may get better at recognising facial expression. ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Practise expressing different emotions i.e. happy, sad, angry, disappointed, worried and excited, with your child. PAGE 12 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Posture and movement EMPATHY Some people say that children with Asperger’s lack empathy. This implies that the child with Asperger’s does not care about other people’s feelings. This is not usually the case. Children with Asperger’s are often very sensitive. However, because they have difficulty reading facial expressions and body language, and may not show facial expressions or have a limited use of gestures, the child with Asperger’s often ‘misses’ what is being expressed by the other person and so it can seem that they do not care. SOLUTIONS If your child has difficulty reading body language it is important that you give clear instructions and convey your message clearly. As before, practise expressing different emotions i.e. happy, sad, angry, disappointed, worried and excited, with your child. Play games where you guess what the other person is feeling from their facial expression or body language. Collect pictures of different facial expressions from magazines, working on one emotion at a time. PAGE 13 Some children with Asperger’s may move in a stiff and formal manner, while others move in a clumsy and uncoordinated way. Children usually know instinctively that they are uncoordinated and may avoid sports such as football, or activities such as riding a bike, that they know are more difficult for them. SOLUTIONS A wide variety of physical activities should be encouraged as they are likely to help coordination. Pick games that encourage motor skills, e.g. jigsaws, building blocks, Lego, climbing equipment, play tunnels, bike riding etc. You might encourage your child to take gymnastics, dance classes, judo etc. However, you may need to be around in the background with a lot of encouragement and even a treat on the way home. ASPERGER’S SYNDROME (iv) Language EYE CONTACT Most people make eye contact without thinking about it. The child with Asperger’s may find it difficult to make consistent and continuous eye contact, or may stare for long periods of time. In extreme cases eye contact can actually disrupt concentration. Eye contact may be so uncomfortable that they cannot think about what is being said. Often children with Asperger’s appear not to be listening and this can be interpreted as rudeness. This is usually not the case and often when questioned you find that the child knows exactly what has been said. SOLUTIONS Encourage your child to make eye contact. With younger children you could play peek-aboo. With older children you can remind him to look at you occasionally. Encourage your child to watch eye contact between a number of other people e.g. TV interviews or brothers and sisters having a chat. Encourage your child to find a level of eye contact that is comfortable for him. However eye contact is something that should not be forced, as it may just be too difficult. Children with Asperger’s often have a very good vocabulary and may talk in a rather formal manner that seems more advanced than their age. However sometimes children with Asperger’s do not fully understand what is being said. The child with Asperger’s may also speak in the same tone all the time with little variation throughout a conversation. Sometimes he may even speak in a different accent from other people in his family. You may notice that your child can speak really well when he is interested in a certain subject. In fact children with Asperger’s can usually talk for hours if it involves their special interest, regardless of whether other people are really listening. Children with Asperger’s are often described as taking things literally. This means that they may believe that phrases have only one meaning. You may also notice that your child accepts what is said without question. PAGE 14 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Children with Asperger’s are usually very honest. You may notice that your child always tells the truth and may be unable to tell even a ‘white lie’. PAGE 15 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME SOLUTIONS It is a good idea to spend time explaining the meaning of different phrases that your child has heard. If it is helpful, ask him to write them down when he hears them, so that you can discuss their meaning later. Make a list of common idioms or ‘figures of speech’ and explain them to your child. Find an outlet for your child’s ability to mimic or use accents e.g. consider enrolling him in a speech and drama class or local amateur dramatics society. Children with Asperger’s are usually very honest. You may notice that your child always tells the truth and may be unable to tell even a ‘white lie’. While this is an admirable quality and can be a refreshing antidote to today’s tendency towards extreme political correctness, sometimes it means that your child may say things that sound insensitive to other people. Using diagrams of speech and thought bubbles, you can show your child visually the difference between thinking some things and saying them out loud. (v) Special Interests Children with Asperger’s often have specific special interests. This usually involves collecting things or a fascination with a certain topic e.g. cars, trucks, trains, dinosaurs, computers, planets or science. These interests do not usually involve other people, so a child who is really fascinated with football i.e. reading about football, talking about players, or collecting football cards, may not actually want to be involved in playing football on a team. Your child may want to talk about or work on his special interest all the time, regardless of whether or not other people are interested. Your child does not mean to be insensitive; he just thinks he is telling the truth. While you do not want to encourage your child to tell lies, you can explain that sometimes we think things about other people and that these thoughts should not be said out loud if they would hurt the other person’s feelings. It may even help to write down some of the things that your child should avoid saying to other people. Role play is a good way of teaching your child when something might be hurtful. This may take a bit of practice. PAGE 16 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME SOLUTIONS Many children have special interests that are enjoyable and do not cause a problem. A special interest may help your child to relax and feel good about himself. You could try using special interests or skills to develop weaker areas or extend to related areas, e.g. learning to count with toy cars, if this is what they are interested in. Use special interests as a way of developing friendships – sharing knowledge with other children who are interested in the same thing. USE YOUR CHILD’S SPECIAL INTEREST AS A REWARD Gradually extend your child’s experience by doing new activities and reward with some uninterrupted time to carry out his special interest. If a special interest takes over or dominates your child’s life, it can be very difficult to eliminate or even change. Any attempt to refuse access to the special interest is usually met with very strong resistance. Controlled access, where you set aside regular periods of time when your child can engage in his special interest, is a much more effective strategy. At other times try to encourage your child to enjoy other activities. PAGE 17 (vi) The Sensory Experience Children with Asperger’s often have heightened sensation in one or all of their senses. They often find it hard to cope if too many senses are bombarded with information. By senses we mean what we see, hear, touch or feel, smell, and taste. Imagine sitting in a café with a friend having a conversation. You would probably be aware of other noises around you – people talking, passing traffic, maybe if you really listen you could hear birds singing outside, but normally you will be able to ignore these other noises and concentrate on the conversation you are having. This may be more difficult for children with Asperger’s; all the noises may sound the same; the distant sound of the birds outside might seems as loud as the person talking across the table. Too much noise, particularly if too many sounds or instructions are coming at once, e.g. a few people talking at the same time, maybe with background music added, can be overwhelming for the child with Asperger’s. The feel of certain materials or surfaces, certain smells, foods or bright lights may also make the child with Asperger’s feel very uncomfortable or even anxious. ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Too much noise, particularly if too many sounds or instructions are coming at once, e.g. a few people talking at the same time, maybe with background music added, can be overwhelming for the child with Asperger’s. PAGE 18 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME SOLUTIONS If you notice that your child reacts to too much sensory stimulation, try to keep his environment quiet and calm, limiting as many of the things that disturb him as possible. You might encourage your child to do things that he likes, e.g. reading, listening to music with headphones. When giving instructions, keep them clear and simple – try writing down important information or drawing pictures to show what is expected. Try to make a quiet place for your child, at home; somewhere he can go when he feels uncomfortable or overwhelmed. This place might have favourite things that soothe your child – a cosy chair, cushions or blanket, books or toys. Some children like headphones with relaxing music, or even ear plugs. PAGE 19 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME WHAT ELSE CAN I DO TO HELP MY CHILD? (i) Routine and Consistency Some people like life to be unpredictable and unplanned. They seem to relish new and exciting challenges. Life seems like one endless rollercoaster ride. But many, many other people like life to be predictable, planned and ordered. Surprises and changes of plan can make some of us anxious and uneasy. Children with Asperger’s tend to be in this second group. They like to know what is going to happen each day and in what order. They feel less anxious and more secure when things are structured and planned. Sometimes children with Asperger’s are described as being rigid. This simply means that they do not like change or surprises. You may find that your child likes to do things in a certain way and do it this way every time. If, for example, you go to the shops a certain way, your child may not like travelling by a different route. Often children with Asperger’s like to arrange things in a certain way or pattern, and can spend hours lining up toys or arranging games without playing them. This repetition of routine may help to make children with Asperger’s feel safe in a confusing world. Children who like structure often do well in school where they know exactly what happens every day. There are rarely any surprises. Home life is naturally less structured; things do not always go as planned in most families. This can be difficult for children with Asperger’s. SOLUTIONS You can help your child by providing structure for him. Many children with Asperger’s like to have a schedule or timetable. This is no different to how many of us use a diary or write lists to organise our day. A written, visually presented schedule can provide the structure and advance warning that your child enjoys. Children with Asperger’s often have particular strengths and difficulties in their thinking skills. Many children with Asperger’s are visual learners. This means that they may remember things better when material is presented visually. This is why written or pictorial schedules often work well. They present the child with clear information about what is going to happen during the day and the sequence of events, in a way they understand immediately. PAGE 20 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME A schedule can let your child know what is going to happen each day, what will be the same and what will be different. It shows what will happen first and what will happen later. Your child’s schedule can let him know when there will be different people around e.g. a new teacher if his regular teacher is sick. It could tell him when he will eat or have a snack. A schedule can also be used to prepare your child for upcoming social events. It helps if the beginning middle and end of an activity is clearly demonstrated. If you are going somewhere it often helps to explain in advance where you are going, how you will get there, who will be there, how long you will stay. As far as possible, try to keep to the arrangements on the schedule. Give advance warning when one thing is finishing and a new activity is about to begin. PAGE 21 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME For smaller children symbols or pictures can be used instead of written words. It is i mportant to actively involve your child in checking his schedule. His schedule may have boxes that can be ticked off when an activity is finished. Keep your child’s schedule in the same place, somewhere prominent where he can have easy access to it when necessary. Catherine Faherty (2000) recommends using a calendar alongside a schedule. This can be marked off by your child every day and used to give advance warning about things that are coming up e.g. haircuts, holidays, visitors coming to stay, or when parents are going to be away. However while a schedule can be used to give advanced warning of upcoming events, some children become anxious if they know about changes too far in advance. You probably know what your child likes and can adjust this to suit him. PAGE 22 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME While we know that children with Asperger’s like structure and while we should facilitate this as much as possible, it is not always possible to keep rigidly to a schedule. Life throws all sorts of things at us. It is important therefore that you have strategies to help your child cope when things have to change. When this happens, it is best to give as much advance warning as possible, and to have a special symbol for changes. However last minute changes are often unavoidable. If this happens it may help to write it down and present it visually on your child’s schedule. Remember that this preference for structure and routine is also one of the strengths that people with Asperger’s have and one that many people appreciate, particularly in the workplace. These individuals are often able to focus on tasks and on small details, that other people cannot cope with. We may not realise it but parenting any child is a bit like being an investigator – you are constantly trying to anticipate your child’s needs – what he likes, what he dislikes, what he is good at, what he has more difficulty with, what works for your child, what does not work. Being a parent of a child with Asperger’s is no different. PAGE 23 Remember, you can be as creative as you want to be in developing your own solutions. Most people learn through trial and error – we learn from our mistakes and make changes accordingly. A child with Asperger’s does not necessarily learn from their mistakes. They may not link behaviour with consequences as we do. They learn best when they are successful. If they do something that is successful they are more likely to repeat that behaviour correctly and consistently. Sometimes changes in your child’s surroundings, such as a different setting, teacher, materials or too much stimulation, may cause your child to act in a different way. It is really important that, as far as possible, the external environment is kept the same. This is where a schedule is useful which may help your child to feel secure when he can predict what is going to happen and who will be there. Changes inside your child’s body may also contribute to inconsistencies in behaviour. If he is tired, sick or anxious, you may notice changes in the way he is able to deal with things. Children with Asperger’s often bottle up their feelings and may be less able to seek help from a responsible adult, than other children. ASPERGER’S SYNDROME You may notice that your child has worries that he does not talk about. This can lead to an explosion in the form of anger or pent up anxiety. It is not unusual for the child with Asperger’s to think you will automatically know what is wrong. Though it is not always easy, it is a good idea to encourage regular, open communication. Try to set aside a few minutes every evening when your child is relaxed, perhaps at bed time. Talk through your child’s day – the good things that happened as well as any worries that he might have. By doing this you are encouraging your child to get in the habit of talking over problems before they build up. Together you can work out solutions or alternative ways of thinking about the problem. If you talk about your day and then include brothers or sisters in these conversations, it encourages turn taking and also shows your child that everyone has good and bad days. This may help your child to develop his ‘emotional intelligence’. These types of discussions are becoming a regular feature of the school curriculum and often take place in small groups, e.g. circle time or feelings corner. We may not realize it but parenting any child is a bit like being an investigator, you are constantly trying to anticipate your child’s needs. PAGE 24 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME (ii) School and Homework For most children who do not have Asperger’s the greatest demand of the school day is the educational curriculum. The child with Asperger’s has the added stress of dealing with the social curriculum. According to Tony Attwood (2000, see website) children with Asperger’s have the extra task of ‘deciphering the social cues and codes and cognitively determining what to do and say in social situations, as well as dealing with noise and other intense sensory experiences and changes in routine throughout the school day’. As a result the child is often ‘intellectually and emotionally exhausted at the end of the school day making homework an extremely demanding and distressing task’. Some children may cope well throughout the day but are difficult to manage at home. It may be that the stress of the school day is spilling over onto home life particularly if the child has to come home and begin doing homework. PAGE 25 Many children with Asperger’s also find that they have difficulty planning, organising and prioritising for themselves. You may find that your child comes home without homework written down. He may have difficulty getting down to doing homework or may lose pens, pencils and even books. Writing may also be difficult for children with Asperger’s and may look messy and untidy; this may improve with practice but sometimes writing does not change a great deal. ASPERGER’S SYNDROME SOLUTIONS The following are some of the strategies that we have found to work: • Provide a clear work-space with only the things that are needed, somewhere with no clutter that is quiet and free from distractions such as noise, toys, television, windows and strong light. • Have pens, pencils and other items of equipment close by. • Use a schedule that tells your child how long to work (eg 20-minutes at a time) and when he will get a break or snack (usually a 10-minute break). It is best to allow regular breaks. A schedule might also include a reminder to pack a P.E. uniform or a musical instrument when they are needed for the following day. • Sometimes a timer is useful to keep a child on task. • If your child does not already use a homework diary, encourage him to start using one. Homework can be written down in class and marked off at home as it is completed. • It may help to colour code school books, e.g. all Maths books covered in red paper, all English books covered in yellow paper. • Encourage your child to pack his school bag the night before and re check that he has not forgotten any thing by using his timetable. • Encourage your child to write clearly and space things out on the page so that any problems with poor presenta tion are minimised. Parents have a really important role in supervising homework – help your child to get started, check in regularly to see that his work is progressing. Help him to organise, plan and prioritise work. Motivate your child with small rewards e.g. stickers. It is important that your child’s school and homework is appropriate to his ability level. It is vital that there is an open line of communication between school and home so that any problems can be addressed as early as possible. Sometimes when things are not going well at school, there is a tendency to sit back and hope that they work themselves out, but this is rarely successful. Good communication and rapport with teachers is far more effective in the long term. When teachers are made aware of any difficulties that home or school work is causing they are usually only too happy to adjust the child’s work load. Both primary and secondary schools have homework policies that contain guidelines on the amount of time to be spent on homework and study. Make contact with your child’s school so that you can get specific guidance on the issue of homework. Finally, if all else fails and homework is becoming more and more stressful, Tony Attwood (2000, see website) suggests that ultimately a child who is experiencing major distress should be exempted from doing homework. PAGE 26 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Will my child have Asperger’s for life? COMMONLY ASKED QUESTIONS Is there a cure for Asperger’s? No, there is currently no known cure for Asperger’s. However some people believe that dietary changes and vitamin supplements have improved their child’s behaviour and concentration. The most successful interventions are those involving a high degree of structure and focus on the development of more appropriate social and communication skills. Yes, Asperger’s is a lifelong condition. However early intervention and understanding of Asperger’s will help your child to adapt better to the demands of adult life. Do more boys have Asperger’s than girls? Yes, we know that many more boys than girls have Asperger’s; in fact the ratio of males to females is 10:1, though research shows that this should be about 4:1. Tony Attwood (1998) suggests that girls may not present with the same degree of difficulty or may cope better and therefore may not come to the attention of health professionals as frequently. How will I explain the diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome to my child - what will I say? You know your child better than anyone, and are the best person to choose the right time to tell him that he has Asperger’s. However it is better that you have fully come to terms with your child’s diagnosis, and have gathered sufficient information about Asperger’s before you can cope with telling him. Some parents have said that talking to other parents in the same situation at this early stage, has really helped them. PAGE 27 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME When you decide to tell your child, choose the right time and place. You might involve other family members if this is helpful. In our experience children respond best to clear and age appropriate information. Do not overload your child with too much information too soon. Focus on your child’s strengths and talents. Make a list of these. Write down the things you love and admire about him. Remind your child that people are not all the same. Some people are good at some things and not so good at others. You could make a list of the ways your child is like other people, and the ways he is different. Asperger’s may be one of the ways he is different from some other people. Some people have said that Asperger’s is just a different way of thinking. It may be helpful to have some written information for your child to read or a workbook that you can work through together. Give your child time to absorb the information you have given him. It may be helpful to join a support group. Many of these groups also provide opportunities for children to meet up with others who have Asperger’s. How can I enhance my child’s self esteem? Find out what your child is good at and promote this activity. Many children with Asperger’s are good at drawing and painting. Some children enjoy listening to music or playing a musical instrument. Others enjoy reading, writing or drama. Others are good with computers. Children with Asperger’s often have really good memories, particularly for details; things that other people miss. They are often good at completing activities and can be single minded and determined, sticking with something once it is started. Does my child have to disclose Asperger’s on job applications? No, it is not necessary to mention Asperger’s on job applications, unless you feel you wish to disclose this information. Can my child get a driving licence? There is no reason why a person with Asperger’s should not drive or do any of the other things that other young people do. PAGE 28 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME PUBLICATIONS There are literally hundreds of books about Asperger’s Syndrome. This is a short list of some of the books that we have found most useful. Asperger’s Syndrome – A guide for parents and professionals Tony Attwood. Jessica Kingsley Publishers, London and Philadelphia, 1998 Tony Attwood is world renowned for his work in this area. He has spent many years working tirelessly researching Asperger’s, working with, and advocating for, people with this syndrome. His books and website (see below) provide an invaluable source of information for parents and professionals. His work is always easy to read and understand. It is often humorous and ultimately inspiring and hopeful. If you buy one book about Asperger’s Syndrome, it should be this one. What does it mean to me? A workbook explaining self awareness and life lessons to the child or youth with High Functioning Autism or Asperger’s. Catherine Faherty. Future Horizons, Arlington, 2000 This is an excellent workbook for children and parents to work through, and fill in together. It is a great source of information for children who have been recently diagnosed, providing a structured means of working through many of the issues that are important to children with Asperger’s in a very positive way. Teaching Children with Autism to Mind-Read. Howlin, Baron-Cohen and Hadwin. 1999. An excellent book with lots of practical activities to teach your child. PAGE 29 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME ORGANISATIONS & SERVICES Tony Attwood www.tonyattwood.com This site provides invaluable information for both parents and professionals. Treatment and Education of Autistic and related Communication handicapped CHildren [and adults] (TEACCH) www.teacch.com A system of structured teaching which maximises the visual presentation of information and helps to physically structure the environment. PAGE 30 ASPERGER’S SYNDROME Autism South Africa has the following brochures available either as downloads from www.autismsouthafrica.org or as hard copies that may be requested from the Autism South Africa office. The material contained in booklets numbered 1 through to 12, was provided by UK National Autistic Society under a Memorandum of Understanding with Autism South Africa. 1. Early Years and Autism Spectrum Disorders. By Christine Deudney and Lynda Tucker. 2. Going to the Shops: a guide for parents of children with autistic spectrum disorders. By Catriona Hauser 3. Bullying and how to deal with it: a guide for pupils with an Autism Spectrum Disorder. By Patricia Thorpe. 4. Going to the doctor: a guide for children with an Autism Spectrum Disorder. By Emma Jones. 5. Patients with an Autism Spectrum Disorder – information for health professionals. By Christine Deudney. 6. Classroom and playground support for children with an Autism Spectrum Disorder. By Prithvi Perepa. 7. Why does Chris do that? By Tony Attwood. 8. Environment and surroundings - How to make them autism-friendly. By Anh Nguyen. 9. Asperger’s Syndrome from diagnosis to solutions – A guide for parents. By Tony Attwood. 10. Working with an Asperger pupil in secondary schools. By Judith Colley. 11. The sensory world of the autistic spectrum: a greater understanding. By Kate Wilkes. 12. Understanding difficulties at break time and lunchtime guidelines for pupils with an Autism Spectrum Disorder. By Patricia Thorpe. 13. Asperger Syndrome. By Dr Cobie Lombard (Autism South Africa) 14. Autism – Practical Aspects (In English, isiXhosa, isiZulu, Setswana, Sesotho, Sepedi and Afrikaans) (Autism South Africa) 15. Sexuality Brochure – “I’m growing up”. By Rebecca Johns. (Autism South Africa) 16. Thoughts of a young sibling. By Kim Stacey (Autism South Africa) 17. Dietary Intervention. By Paul Shattock and Paul Whitely. (Autism South Africa) PAGE 31
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