Funded by an educational Grant from SCAVMA and the Student Unrestricted Donor Account MAR 2012 THE CALIFORNIA WAGGIE Since 2005 at the UC Davis School of Veterinar y Medicine Finding a Mentor Where’s my Poo Contest By Vivian R. Wright AVMA GHLIT UCD Representative Whether you’ve already landed your first position as a veterinarian or if you’re still in the midst of the job hunt, having someone to turn to for professional advice and guidance is a safety net no student should be without. Establishing a relationship with an accomplished veterinarian who is willing and able to serve as your mentor is one way to help ensure you’re ready for any situation. A mentor can provide you with valuable information that can’t be taught in the classroom…and guide you down the professional path based on real-life experience. Much of what I’m sharing with you on how to successfully identify a mentor, I gathered from a presentation by Dr. James Peddie, “Interviewing is a Two Way Street,” available on the AVMA Group Health & Life Insurance (GHLIT) website. I also referenced the American Veterinary Medicine Association (AVMA) and other DVM-focused websites and held conversations on the topic with my spouse, William Wright, DVM, and others who have mentored new veterinarians over the years. As stated by Dr. Peddie, the most important thing to look for when identifying a mentor is finding someone with whom you are comfortable talking. Your mentor should be someone that you can be open with about your questions and concerns, however trivial you may think they are. Conversely, your mentor should also feel comfortable guiding you through tough situations. This open communication will result in the best possible mentor-mentee relationship. When looking for a mentor, it is also important to select someone who is knowledgeable in the veterinary field. The more experience the better! Veterinarians who have worked in the field for a number of years have likely seen it all and will be able to guide you through situations based on their firsthand experience. Further, a strong mentor will be knowledgeable on all aspects of working in a practice, from communicating with pet owners to cultivating relationships with colleagues and practice staff. For those of you with plans to work in a highly specialized field of veterinary medicine, it is a good idea for your mentor to work in the same field. They can provide you with information specific to your specialty. But where does one find a mentor that fits these specifications? Becoming involved in one of the veterinary medicine organizations is an excellent way to see MENTOR, continued on page 2 Congratulations to Rebecca Pacheco (middle, holding poo plate) and her poo-protracting assistants Joyce Wong and April Larson, for finding the poo underneath Jadaan, the horse that Rudolph Valentino rode in “The Son of the Sheik.” Jadaan is a bit thinner than he was during the filming, and I suppose Valentino is too. Yes, YOU can win the NEXT Where’s My Poo Contest. In case you didn’t read the Rules in the last “Waggie,” here they are again: I’ll hide a fake latex poo pile somewhere around the vet school, which can include Valley Hall, MPT, VM3A, Gourley, the VMTH and associated buildings, Schalm Hall, etc.--either in one of the buildings or perhaps outdoors--and provide some clues in the Waggie to help you find my poo. Once you find my poo, you will bring it back to me, but that’s not all--there’s a learning objective here-- Attached to the poo, quite literally, will be 3 parasitological questions that you must answer correctly to win the prize. You should already know the answers IF you have taken VMD405, but you (especially first year students who won’t have had this experience) are welcome to look up the answers on the Internet or other source, and then present them when you bring my poo back to me. Only one winner per edition of the game; the first to bring me the poo and answer the questions correctly wins the prize. I will then re-hide the poo in a new spot and present new clues when the next Waggie is issued, and I’ll continue this crappy game until: a) you get bored with it, b) I get bored with it, or c) the poo mysteriously disappears— perhaps flushed by an attentive custodian (ha!). This month’s clue is a numbers game. You need to spell out a phrase, read from top to see MYPOO, continued on page 8 Tacos, Page 2 • Templeton’s Wisdom, Page 8 • Hot or Not, Page 12 1 Erratum The editors would like to recognize that Dustin Dennis was erroneously spelled as “Dennis Dustin” in the “Where’s my Poo?” article of the past February issue. We apologize for our grievous error and have assigned a committee to conduct a formal investigation on the matter. There have also been several blatant formatting errors throughout the year, and as penance, the editors have committed to monthly self flagellation in front of the heart tree of the Arboretum. We hope this small gesture will appease those of you who were offended. Our sincere thanks to those who brought these mistakes to light. Your input is critical to making this process a success, and we hope you will continue to support The California Waggie. Fauna by Greg Bishop www.faunacartoon.com -Co-editors The Davis Dish: Street Tacos By Liz Engall Approved by Kelsey Brust Amateur critics Expert restaurant patrons It is a cold winter night. You have just left the warmth of a downtown bar where you were celebrating the joys of vet school and Scott Lafey’s recent emergence as a 15 year old girl. But it is cold and dark outside, and there is a growing emptiness in your belly that beer isn’t able to fill. Your stomach leads you down a dark alley, but just when it seems like the cold hunger will overcome you, you happen upon Street Taco Guy. Yup, you heard me right. Street tacos in Davis. Almost every Thursday, Friday, and Saturday night since the summer of 2011, a late night culinary genius is on the street in front of Cloud Forest Café with his barbeque, cooking supplies, and culinary assistant, making Que rico! fresh and delicious street tacos. Even better news, they are cheap. $1.25 each or 5 tacos for $5, including carne asada, pollo, and veggie (cheese-stuffed grilled peppers that take a couple extra minutes, but worth the wait because he hand-stuffs a pepper for you and puts it on the grill!). Can you say,”legit?” The bike ride home will probably be long, cold, and dark, but with a belly full of warm deliciousness, the drunchies are gone, and the world is again a happy place :) [email protected] Official Factoid of the Month The slow transport of sperm in the female genital tract is responsible for providing fertilizing sperm to the oviduct! 2 MENTOR, continued from page 1 way to connect with potential mentors. These organizations will provide useful information on veterinary medicine and will also connect you with both a number of up-and-coming and established veterinarians in your community. If you are already working as a veterinarian, your place of employment may be the best and easiest place to find a mentor. Aside from being available on a daily basis, choosing a mentor who works by your side will help you navigate through your organization’s specific procedures and politics, helping you transition into your new job as smoothly as possible. Establishing a mentor relationships early on in your career will not only help you to become a better veterinarian, but will teach you how to cultivate strong working relationships as you travel down your career path. With a mentor, you will always have a trusted source to turn to when you need information or advice as you advance in your career. The connections you make now will follow you for years to come! So make sure you are connecting with the right people now. My spouse has been a DVM for over 30 years, and his best friend today is his original mentor, Dr. Jack Walther, past president of the AVMA and UCD grad. [email protected] (888) 234-6159 Pet Personals Emily Isaacs tapped into animal whispering at a young age, which allows her to pass these ads on to you. If your pets are on the dating market, send in their pictures and a few fun facts to: [email protected] “Penny” Lytle-Hoover Looking for a little copper pocket change? Well I’m the Penny for you! Whether it’s heads or tails you’re looking for, I’m one cute chi whose romantic moves all make cents. Dream date: spooning on your lap or lying together on cozy fluffy blankets. Likes: surprising people with my many tricks (preferably on that comfy blanket), playing with squeaky toys, cuddling with sister Breeze, Slutty Brownies. Dislikes: my small bladder, Deb leaving me to go to class, wooden nickels. “Dante” De Oliveira Love my winning Yoda costume? Take me on a date and I might show you my light saber (once you see it, let’s just say—may the force be with you to reject a second date…). I’m a 1.5 year old dude whose personality is a mix of Cartman and Stewie so you know I’m a laugh to be around. Dream date: Exploring your galaxy far far away. Likes: taking over the house, showing off my talents with mom Kat. Dislikes: Extended hospital stays, long hairdresser appointments, all the Star Wars nerds who flock to me. “Diego” Brownlee My name is Diego aka Diablo aka Fat Man. I’m an 8 year old DSH who recently went on Jenny Craig to trim down so I need a fellow feline to appreciate my newly trim white and orange body! Dream date: chasing mouse toys, feathers and lasers with you. Likes: Relaxing with my lab Candie, taking extended naps while “studying“ (see my photo), putting together vet club websites. Dislikes: All the mean nicknames mom Rachel calls me, memorizing cerebral tracts. “Kingsnakey” Liu Hoping for a scaly gal who will slither her way into your heart? I’m a 3 year old Gray-Banded Kingsnake who just pulled a Sleeping Beauty and stopped hibernating so I’m ready to get (my eggs) laid. I have the physical agility of a gymnast without those obstructing appendages so you know I’ll be a real good time. Help a lady out before it’s too late? Dream date: Sharing a frozen hopper over a nice heating pad. Likes: giving *really* tight hugs, ophiophagy, people who realize I’m loveable. Dislikes: having to share James’ love and affection with his 500 other reptiles (maybe if he focused just on me, he could pick a more original name…). “Liz” Stallings I’m a tri-color feline who’s hoping to be your forever lady. Mom Mary only uses my full-name when I’m naughty so call me “Elizabeth” all night long and I’ll be one very bad girl. While I’m supposed to be an indoor cat, I love escaping the house to explore the outdoors where I can meet you for secret rendezvous. Dream date: long walks outside under the full moon. Likes: strolling across keyboards while people are typing (special typed note from me to you: “F2SJLK!J3A”). Dislikes: fewer than 2100 square feet of my own space, being dressed up in silly pumpkin costumes. 3 FREE FOR SAVMA MEMBERS, WHICH MEANS YOU!! SCAVMA CORNER SCAVMA Funding: IMPORTANT DEADLINES These deadlines apply to CLUBS and STUDENT COMPANY REPS. Questions? Email [email protected] • May Funding Apps due by April 15th • No funding for the months of June-August SCAVMA COMMITTEES WORKING FOR YOU! SCAVMA IS CURRENTLY WORKING ON THE FOLLOWING STUDENT BODY ISSUES. CONTACT [email protected] IF YOU WISH TO BECOME INVOLVED IN THESE DISCUSSIONS! 1. CLUB ACTIVITIES REDUNDANCY WITH NEW AND OLD CURRICULUM 2. FUNDING OF MAJOR SYMPOSIA AND 3. EVENTS – HOW CAN WE USE COMPANY DONATIONS MORE EFFICIENTLY? HCV POLICY: INCREASING UNDERSTANDING AND ACCESSIBILITY FOR REPS AND STUDENTS 2012 AVMA CONVENTION 4 • FREE FOR SAVMA MEMBERS. All of our current UC Davis SCAVMA Members have been signed up with SAVMA (we do this automatically for you at the beginning of registration) LOCATION: SAN DIEGO, CA! WHEN: August 4-7, 2012! • Must register by July 9th ! • MORE INFORMATION AT: http://www.avmaconvention.org /avma12/public/enter.aspx XYZ By David Kim C o -E d i t o r I was a pimply faced, unbelievably shy 12-year-old boy when I entered my first woodwinds competition, and the thought of having to perform in front of a large group of people had me nearly crapping my pants. I can remember anxiously awaiting my turn. I got out of my chair shaking as I made the long trek to the front of the room. My pianist gave me a reassuring smile as I tuned my clarinet, and then to the shock of the spectators and judges, I proceeded to play my prepared pieces with my back turned towards the audience. Needless to say, I didn’t place. The trip back home was long and silent with my head hung low and eyes downcast when I noticed that in the chaos of getting ready that morning, I had neglected to zip up my zipper. I was left wondering what was worse: my costly faux pas or facing the audience with my fly open. Looking back, I can admit that I was afraid of being judged and let that fear hinder me from showing myself. Anthony de Mello, a Jesuit priest, put things in perspective when he said, “I’m going to write a book someday, and the title will be I’m an Ass, You’re an Ass.” I spent so much time worrying about how others would see me, but what did it really matter when I would have looked like an idiot either way? I find this quote more applicable now than ever in an environment where I am surrounded by geniuses and academic expectations and means are ridiculously high. Before starting here, I wondered how my fellow classmates would perceive me, a nontraditional student with, to put it lightly, a weak undergraduate track record, but I pushed those thoughts aside because I could only be me. Yet when we’re at school, there appears to be a conflict with that. I believe this partly stems from the constant stress of being professional, which seems to focus a lot more on the end product of receiving our DVMs rather than our journey getting there. But we shouldn’t let this emphasis completely dictate how we act in fear of being criticized by others, especially when we’re in this together. I don’t know about you, but I didn’t crawl around in the grass blindfolded, looking for a lousy piece of rope during orientation, to do this thing alone. Sure, we will be vets soon enough, but we’re also students, bound to look silly from time to time or in my case, daily. So in my short time here, whether it’s in the clinics or on the dance floor, I’m going to embrace my inner ass and show it to the world! Given my penchant for poop among other things, I realize I don’t have the most credible opinion, but to me, part of being professional is having the confidence to go balls out even if I may be wrong and learning from it. I went on to win that music competition a few years later, but I never did get the hang of remembering to check my zipper. Thank God for scrubs. [email protected] Overheards By Maggie Lin E av e s d r o p p e r “Even in a blocked cat, we should not see a bladder here.” -Dr. Spriet, regarding a mass in the lung “Case 2. Losing weight for 1 month. I wish.” -2nd year, reading aloud in lab “What happens if you cross a giraffe and a porcupine? What kind of progeny would you get?... Barbed wire!...I suppose it would work with a snake and a porcupine, but I thought I would stick with mammals.” -Dr. Guedes in response to a request that he tell a joke. “You will have to ask Dr. Conley about that. I have no idea how Dr: Burton: “Each inch of banana humans reproduce.” has 1 mmol of K.” -Dr. Rowe Female 2nd year: “I want all the inches of that banana!” “It’s not invasive. You just stick your arm up her butt and poke a “Hey girl, you’re pretty good at few things.” dancing.... you wanna be in my -2nd year regarding uterine music video?” examination -Anonymous creeper at KetMo “If you’re hacking up a lung, that’s not allergies.” -2nd year regarding a sick classmate in denial reach the food. Student #2: She would eat her arm off. Yo mama so fat, she would never stop eating long enough to get hepatic lipidosis. “The huggies have to be a certain size or else it will dribble down Heard something inappropriate their chubby little legs!” or professionally unacceptable -Anonymous lately? Send your quotes to: “Yo momma’s like a wetlab. Ev- [email protected] erybody’s getting experience! -2nd year Student #1: Yo mamma so fat, she has hepatic lipidosis. Student #2: No, she would have to stop eating to get that. Student #1: She so fat she can’t 5 A Mild March Theme By Thea (I can’t believe this is my study break) Lambert [email protected] Answers on Page 10 Across: 4. Spotlight: SCAVMA VP who patiently answers all our clubrelated conundrums. 7. What sneaked up on me at the end of this quarter, is making me panic and made this crossword puzzle a last minute project. 10. What the very professionally dressed visitors wandering in Valley are currently experiencing. 13. The title of the highly anticipated book to movie adaptation released this month. Down: 1. The one week (a little less for first years) all of us are dying 6 to get to (especially 2nd years) after this quarter (again – not so much for 1st years). 2. Nonny tidbit: Her favorite vegetarian snack upon which she grazes with alarming frequency and yet never throws it up. (Hint: you mow it) 3. That March holiday that is driving force behind green beer and a reason for vet students to get hammered. 4. What the 3rd years face in just a few months!!! Holy smokes!!! 5. Established pop music icon that is building up to releasing a new record later this month and reinventing herself…again. 6. It’s that time of season – OKP is about to be inundated with these! 8. My most bizarre Facebook Scrabble word that is known as a monetary unit of Zambia equal to one hundredth of a kwacha (not kidding – it was in the Scrabble dictionary). 9. What the 2nd years are starting to think about, need to have set by December-ish and will help make their 4th year amazing! 11. Event put on by 2015ers to display the wacky, the weird, the talented (and the publicly acceptable) of vet school and includes everyone’s favorite vet school entertainment – Ken and his band! 12. Knows pretty much everything about poo and parasites and occasionally speaks in a Southern twang. IM Sports Update By Hey-Scott-We-got-an-IM-Shirt Sports Reporter Despite the dreary winter quarter, there have been some very exciting developments in the sports world with a focus on futbol. Here is the exclusive on two of the top indoor soccer teams that went on to win their respective divisions. Animal Crackers, captained by Jenny Gorman (2014) and coached by Michelle Morelos, following her horrific ankle injury and subsequent demotion, went 5-1-1 in the Men’s Grad/ Staff League, and beat the previously undefeated team 3-2 in the finals. Animal Crackers (6-1) also Animal Crackers played in the CoRec Grad/Staff league and went undefeated in the regular season, only to face The Noodicals (5-2), the third year team captained by Emily Miller, in a vicious finals match that displayed their long standing and heated rivalry. The Noodicals came back down from 0-2 to go up 4-2 before winning it 4-3. However, if you take away Jon Dickson and his adorable hipsterness, Animal Crackers actually won 3-0. Congratulations to both teams! The Noodicals Support Mercer Veterinary Clinic by ordering apparel! Many styles, colors and sizes available Go to http://tinyurl.com/mercerorder to place your order by April 6th 7 MYPOO, continued from page 1 bottom, that will guide you to the poo; note the spaces between words. The blanks along the left margin need to be filled in with letters of the alphabet. Use the clue next to each blank to find the letter corresponding to its position in the alphabet (1=A, 2=B, ect … 26=Z) . For example, the first letter of the 6th word of the phrase is an “S” because Charles Dickens was a 19th century author, and S is the 19th letter of the alphabet. ___ # periods in an ice hockey game (=___) ___# of balls in a game of 8-Ball, excluding cue ball (=___) ___ major bad luck number (=___) ___ sides of a pentagon (=___) Space ___ legal age to drink on Guam (=___) ___ “Sweet (blank)” (=___) Space ___”We’re No. (blank)!” (=___) ___ # pounds in a stone (=___) ___ Johannes Brahms composed this many symphonies (=___) Space ___ Atomic number of S (=___) ___ Homophone of “won” (=___) ___ a dozen (=___) ___ # ounces in a British pound (=___) ___ an integer divided by itself (=___) ___ the number of children J.S. Bach fathered (=___) ___ Kings’ John Salmons wears this no. (=___) Space ___ age that a Jewish boy becomes a man (=___) ___ J,K and L share this numbered button on most phones’ keypads (=___) Space _S_ Charles Dickens was a (blank) th century author (=19) ___ legal marriage age for women (girls?) in Niger (=___) ___# of stars on Betsy Ross’ flag (=___) ___ I-(blank)links the cities of Seattle, Sacramento & San Diego (=___) ___ Andrew Jackson appears on the (blank) dollar bill (=___) ___ # of planets in our solar system… up until a few years ago (=___) ___ # of people attending the Last Supper (=___) ___ You should have been born with this many toes (=___) Space ___ other than the batter, the # of players on Wrigley field (=___) ___ # of lines in a sonnet (=___) Space ___ # cards in each suit of a deck (=___) ___ # pawns in a chess set (=___) ___ # ounces in a Venti from Starbucks (=___) Note: Robin will be on poo-vacation in Ireland until March 26th; if you’ve found THE poo before then, hold off on bringing it back to him until March 26. -Robin Houston, 1130B MPT (754-0138) and 1013 VMTH (752-3280) Learned over Time By Templeton the Rat Avid Glutton My wisdom is limited, but this is what I do know after 1 year and 1 quarter and half of a quarter. 1. Rank one probably sounds great, but 40 other people probably share that title. 2. When a group of you hang out with non-vet students, you realize that vet students talk about nothing other than vet school. 3. You will probably be in therapy by the end of winter quarter second year or earlier. 4. If you’re going to complain about your classmates on facebook, chances are they will probably see it. 5. You realize you’ve been having more than the recommended serving of carbs – in beer. 6. Ironically, you will not have time for your pets because you spend all of your time learning how to take care of other people’s pets. 7. In dealing with stress, you will either become really buff or really obese. 8. In expressing your concerns about the future of the old curriculum, prepare to hear about how amazing the new curriculum is. 9. You know it’s finals week when you walk into the room and 80% of your classmates look really scary without makeup on. 10. If you want to start an uproar, sit in a different seat in lecture or bring up the Smoker. 8 Easter By Jimmy Rose Staff Wr i te r I know we’re all wrapped up in school, looking forward to Spring Break, and oh yeah, Easter is coming up. It’s not until April 8th, and some of us may chow down some candy that day, but I wanted to write in the Waggie a little reminder that Easter Sunday actually commemorates one of history’s most amazing stories. Mary was just a common gal who had a crush on Joseph when she claimed an angel snuck into her bedroom and told her she was pregnant. Being a virgin, that was obviously some bizarre miracle. She stuck to her story and delivered Jesus while using a livestock barn for a hotel. Joseph scooped some grain out of the feed trough (manger) and put the newborn in it for a crib while Wise men from distant lands (who got to Jesus by following a bright star across vast deserts) laid gold and other stuff down on the hay as gifts. Something was definitely different about that baby. As a boy, young Jesus would amble into synagogues and lay some parables down that humbled the wisest of men. At the age of 30, he put his carpenter’s tools back in their box and became a traveling Rabbi. He’d never attended any fancy college or theological seminary, but spoke sermons that were so fantastic they are still quoted in every corner church you can find. I’m not trying to get you into a church on Easter Sunday. You can read His stuff in what’s, by a landslide margin, the #1 bestselling book of all time: the Bible. According to it, when Jesus rolled into a town, he drew crowds in the thousands. They never got tired of hearing his stories, stayed as long as he would - even if that meant he had to pull miracles like multiplying a few fish and loaves of bread into an all-you-can-eat buffet, he’d teach for everyone who’d listen. So who was he really? By what power did he perform miracles in public like healing the blind, curing folks with leprosy, and even raising the dead back to life? That’s a strange fella, and after a few years of his show, skeptics who couldn’t debunk the man became haters and decided he had to go. They tried, but no court of law could convict him of any crime, so Pontius Pilate, the Governor of Judea, worked a deal to exchange the sentence of a death row inmate named Barabbas to execute Jesus instead. Many people expected another miracle; some even taunted him to save himself rather than just bleeding-out on the cross they’d nailed him to. Here’s where the story gets really interesting. Obviously he died, but three days later guards at his tomb said his body somehow came up missing; hence, the original Easter Sunday. Allegedly, he appeared to his disciples and several other people, claimed to have defeated death, and was going to prepare a place in Heaven for those who believe. So was Jesus really God in the flesh who walked among men and then returned to Heaven? I actually do believe that, and a few years ago, I portrayed Him in an Easter morning reenactment (picture attached). I heard a song on the radio that made me think, heck if it’s all true and someday I get the chance to stand before the creator of the universe and all of life’s imponderables, I’d like to ask him something tough, like explaining a dimension that has no known answer. Maybe I could ask Him just how far the East is from the West. He’d probably smile and say it’s equal to the distance from one of His scarred hands to the other. After all, He is Jesus Christ. It’s not possible to prove God’s existence, but that can’t be the standard for belief. In fact, it is equally impossible to prove He doesn’t exist. In the end, whether you believe or don’t believe, your position is based on faith. [email protected] 9 An Appeal to Fellow Type-A Nutjobs Hello my brethren. People may call you crazy, call you too uptight, and a myriad of other less-than-flatteringthings, but hey man, I get you. We just care about our grades right? I mean, who can punish us for that? But there are some things that maybe you and I need to be reminded of from time to time- let’s take a walk down memory lane, so follow me if you will. Over these past few weeks, looking around at all the interviewees in their unfortunate pantsuits, do you remember how utterly freaked out you were and how you would have done anything (ANY. THING.) to get into this school, into this class? Oh, I know you felt that way. And when you got that letter? Overwhelming joy and subsequent fierce pride for your school, your future profession, and your life accomplishments in general. Now that we’ve been reminded of a time when we didn’t complain about literally every aspect of veterinary school and resent professors who are too [insert any quality ever exhibited by any human being ever at all ever], I’m going to introduce you to words to live by: WIUTTWFT? Ya, I know you love the hell out of learning tools like the acronym above, which obviously stands for, “Would I Use This Tone With Fern Tablin?” I’m going to hazard a guess and say that, in most cases, no we would not. Dr. Tablin is one of the most highly respected professors by the students of our school, and as a general badass, she is not attacked in her class, her test questions are not scrutinized beyond the point of all reason, and no one would ever be heard talking smack about her during passing periods. It’s a shame that we do not afford that same respect to each of our professors, all of whom are equally deserving. So when we act ridiculously and forget how lucky, nay, privileged we are to have even been given the opportunity to answer a 2-point question incorrectly on an exam, it’s doing ourselves a disservice. Those people in the unfortunate pantsuits? They would kill for that opportunity; they would love to have been able to miss those points. So the next time we have the urge to fly off the handle in a way that we may regret in later days, we should pause and think, “WIUTTWFT?” Yours in shared Myers-Briggs Type, A Fellow Type-A Nutjob Davis Crime Watch Name: Connie Lo Age: 23 Ethnicity: Taiwanese Height: 5’3 Affiliations: SCAVMA treasurerelect, Mercer volunteer coordinator, IVO VP, and much muchmore... Name: Christine Hsueh Age: 24 Ethnicity: Taiwanese Height: 5’4 Affilations: SAVMA rep, Sx club Secretary/Treasurer, CMC symposium coordinator, and much much more... At a cursory glance, Connie Lo and Christine Hsueh seem similar enough. They share a similar ancestry, have plenty of leadership experience, and are well-versed in killing a man (the former in archery and the latter in Taekwondo). Yet these superficial overlaps have caused more than few students to mistake one for the other, leaving the two victims with a sense of helplessness, anger, and betrayal. At the end of the day, one has to wonder if these mistakes are simply an innocent mix up or imply an inability to distinguish between yellow undertones. Yet who is really at fault here? The pair certainly does not make it easy to tell one from the other. They live to- gether, sit next to each other in class, and are even involved in the same clubs. And with those hard scientific facts, it’s hard to see how anyone could not be confused. To play the race card is an effortless cop out, but how hard would it be for these two to distinguish themselves from each other, making it easier on everyone else. So who is the true offender? Is it one or the other? Or are both parties at fault in violating and abusing UC Davis’ Hate-Free Campus Initiative? Regardless of the answer, the more important question remains. Who is the real panda? Or is it just one person? We leave this to you, the Waggie reader, to decide. Questions? Complaints? Good soup recipes? Send em over to the editors at: Lea Mehrkens - [email protected] David Kim - [email protected] Crossword Answers: Across 4. CJ 7. Finals 10. Interviews 13. TheHungerGames Down 1. SpringBreak 2. Grass 3. StPatricksDay 4. Clinics 5. Madonna 6. Kittens 8. Ngwee 9. Externship 11. TalentShow 12. RobinHouston 1 0 Dear Sartorius J.O.E Your trustworthy guide to all of life’s problems Sartorious J.O.E.- help. Back off and be yourself. Well, unless you are a selfish, Some of my classmates are conceited, female dog. You might always asking teachers questions want to put on the face of a nice and keeping teachers late to do person… since you actually need so. What are they doing, why are to do this for the rest of your life they doing this? if you want to be a successful vet. Nice trumps a lot of things. Well, there are different posRemember that. sibilities for this. One such possibility is that they actually Precious, precious J.O.E, have questions and are trying to learn. This possibility is the I was at a social function a few most reasonable and best reason weeks ago, and having had a for students to ask questions few drinks, I was well on my but is likely not the reason your way to true happiness. I had just classmates are doing so. The popped open a can of PBR (I more likely reason for their was beyond taste at this point) question asking is to try and get when I caught the eye of a the teacher to “know“ them, so wench who looked disapprovthey can get a letter of reference ingly at my choice and judged from them later on when apme to an eternity in Gehenna. plying for jobs and internships. What would have been the This is abysmal, bad form, rude, proper and professional choice and deceitful. Most of the teach- of action in this situation? ers can see through this, and while they are willing to answer -Ihatehipsters the questions in the hope the offending students really just want The proper and professional to learn, they are remembering choice? Professional has gone these students but not in the way clean out the window in this they are hoping. establishment. Slap that judgSo for all of you students that mental judger and do what you are trying to get letters of refer- want be crazy. ence, just remember being able to scratch the back of the teach- Dear Sartorious Joe, er’s uvula with your nose doesn’t I would like to do the infamous Plum Island summer externship during the inevitable upcoming zombocalypse. I think it’s pretty obvious that with the typical vesicular lesions of the average zombie combined with widespread gas gangrene, the zombie virus is actually Zoonotic Zombie Vesicular Disease (I’m guessing a picorna because zombies never seem to wear many clothes) with a concurrent case of full-body blackleg. Anyways, for scientific purposes, should I try to be allowed to experimentally infect farm animals with ZZVD at the same time I’m innoculating adorable farm animals with the other vesicular diseases? Don’t worry, I won’t forget my cricket bat. to become a well-rounded doctor? GOD NO. A cricket bat? Really? Where are we, London? Bring a dang baseball bat. Come on, we a‘Merican. And why would you want to infect farm animals? Just inoculate cats. No one really cares about them. -Slayer in Schalm What is your take on classes that you don’t *have* to take for your track, but that sound interesting? Is it worth the extra stress and time commitment to take them in the never-ending quest for veterinary knowledge Do you need some advice? Questions can be sent to: Sincerely: Take ALL the Classes Audit, Audit, Audit. Learn without tests! Better than trying to memorize the “most Important thing you will learn in vet school” but will never actually need in the real world. I am almost positive that Austin Kerns is in fact a vampire, and yet I can’t prove it. Do you think I should do the garlic-mirror test, which has a low sensitivity and specificity, or just go ahead and rid humanity of this dark being? Thanks J.O.E., Try the garlic and mirror, but stab him with a wooden stake for good measure. He needs to go anyway, always screwing up the curve. [email protected] Liliaceaeoma By Alina Kelman 1 1 Hot or Not 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1 2
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