Your jobs and your toddler’s jobs with feeding To feed your toddler, do your own jobs and let him do his jobs. • You decide what, when and where your child gets to eat. • He decides how much and whether he eats–of what you offer. pl e For you, sorting out your jobs from your toddler’s jobs is tricky. For your toddler, it isn’t tricky at all. He watches you and picks up on what you do and how you feel about eating. He knows instantly when you try to do his jobs and reacts by getting stubborn or defiant. He is frightened when you don’t do your jobs and reacts by behaving worse and worse until you have to take charge. Check yourself. Are you doing your jobs? Are you letting your toddler do his jobs? Your feeding jobs Your child’s eating jobs q Participate (even briefly) in meals and snacks. q Don’t let your child him have munchies or drinks (except water) between times. q Do his eating (or not-eating) at family meals and sit-down snacks. q Give him some but not all the attention. q Behave nicely at the table. Enjoy being there. q Seat him so he can see and reach his food. q Sit to eat but probably wiggle and squirm. Sa m q Have regular family meals and sit-down snacks. q Relax, enjoy, pay attention to your own meal. q Enjoy, look, taste, eat one, two, or no foods. q Not persuade, reward, or pressure. q Be matter-of-fact about eating or not-eating. q Let him eat as much or as little as he wants. q Go by his feelings of hunger and fullness. q Let him get messy, eat with fingers or utensils. q Not make a mess on purpose. Copy how you eat. q Let him leave when he says he is done. q Learn to play quietly while you finish eating. q Have him leave if he doesn’t behave. q Learn to not beg for food or have tantrums. © Copyright 2011 Ellyn Satter. May be reproduced only by registered purchasers of Ellyn Satter’s Feeding with Love and Good Sense II: Parent Teaching Package. Copyright notice must appear on each copy. For purchase information, see www.EllynSatter.com.