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W I - D M S I X V . \ I . \ K C M Ki. 2(K>2 • P a ^ c ( 1
Tender toughness
When the going gets tough, so does Hodgson
By Melanie Cummings
SPECIAL TO THE BEAVER
abs Hodgson is the epitome of the adage
‘when the going gets tough, the tough
get going.’
Her life reads like a litany of suffering — she’s
already buried three of her children, as well as her
husband, and was near the brink of death herself
following a horrific car crash.
But she’s more than a survivor.
With arms full o f such experience she’s putting
it to good use as a bereavement counsellor.
Barely mobile as result o f her car crash injuries,
Hodgson, 82, relies on a strong arm to keep her bal
ance. or wheel her in a chair, out the door with an
oxygen tank in tow.
Hodgson grabs a ride from a friend and heads to
Trinity United Church every Friday morning for a
9:30 am . meeting.
The group is called the Trinity Bereavement
Group, and is comprised of about 10 people,
mostly women... more specifically mothers —
mothers like Hodgson whose children who have
died.
"I’m so glad the
Tears, sadness, laughter Lord has asked me
to help these peo
and joy. “They are all a
great release, no matter ple," said Hodgson,
who credits her
which one is
faith as the source
o f her strength.
expressed.”
Just as quickly
• Bahs Hodgson
as she has said this,
she also adds that
the group is non-denomi national and she’s not a
‘Bible thumper’.
Described as an informal and relaxed bereave
ment group, it is likely a reflection of Hodgson’s
personality.
"We don’t set an agenda, so it is easy for any
one to join in anytime."
Meetings evoke the gamut of emotions though.
Tears, sadness, laughter and joy.
"They are all a great release, no matter which
B
one is expressed,” said Hodgson.
She compares grief to a scar. It’s an open wound
that heals with time, but it is always there, as a
reminder of the person who has died.
The similarities people in grief share are
numerous, and their differences are unique, says
Hodgson.
All agree the death of a loved one is something
that changes you forever.
For Hodgson her life has been irrevocably
altered too many times.
Her son Jimmie was diagnosed with diabetes at
age four. By the time he was in his 20s the disease
had taken a terrible toll on his body. At age 28, he
became the first Canadian to receive a pancreatic
transplant. For three months the surgery seemed a
success, but then his body rejected the organ. He
lived three years more and finally died. He was
just 31.
In his honour, and partly to ease her grief.
Hodgson wrote a book about Jimmie entitled
Courage Unending.
It would seem Hodgson took a lesson from her
son. The same week he had his transplant, her hus
band Jack died in her arms of a massive heart
attack. He was just 61. They’d been happily mar
ried for 28 years.
"I had no time to mourn for Jack because of my
son's surgery." It was a year of living in a sus
pended reality before Hodgson realized her hus
band really was gone from her life.
Her son, John, also died in her arms of a heart
attack. He was 52 years old.
Hodgson’s time to grieve his death was cut short
by her own terrible car accident. Hodgson’s injuries
were so severe — nine cracked ribs, broken neck,
back, sternum and clavicle, four cardiac arrests and
a period of unconsciousness for three months — it
was a year before she could leave the hospital.
As if unending, Hodgson’s family would suffer
yet another death when a third son, the middle one,
Donald committed suicide at age 42. Only three
years before he jumped over the rails at Niagara
Falls. Donald was diagnosed with paranoid schiz
ophrenia.
Hodgson is currently writing a book about his tor-
Liesa K ortm ann* Oakville Beaver
Babs Hodgson, who ru n s a bereavem ent group at T rinity U nited C h u rch , sits reading a book
she w rote a fte r m em bers of h e r fam ily passed away.
mented life of dreadful delusions entitled Peace at
Last.
Like her bereavement counseling, the book is to
help others understand schizophrenia.
In the similar vein o f creating awareness,
Hodgson also wrote a book on the subject of
bereavement. The Strife o f G rief the Hope o f
Healing, written to assist funeral directors.
Hodgson takes great comfort in the friends and
family she has left — her two daughters Carol and
Janie and her four grandchildren.
And although she’s in no hurry to be reunited
with her sons and husband, she also takes comfort
in the belief that it is a possibility.
"If I’m mistaken about an afterlife with them.
I’ll be as mad as hops about it," said Hodgson,
half-grinning.
Those interested in participating in the Trinity
Bereavement Group, or ordering Hodgson’s
books can call her at 905-844-0573.
Seminar offers the keys to successful relationships
Are you single, but desiring a real
and sincere relationship in your life?
Do you find yourself asking. "Why
can’t I meet anyone really wonderful ?”
- the world-wide lament of millions of
singles.
Don't despair because help is on the
way.
A sem inar entitled Keys to
Relationship Success will be presented
by the Canadian Single Adult Ministry
(CSAM) and Single Adults Alive to
provide an insight into the real issues
and proven principles for creating a life
long relationship no matter at what age.
The sem inar will be held on
Saturday, March 16. from 10 a.m.-4
p.m. at Calvary Baptist Church, 1215
Lakeshore Rd. W. Presenting will be
Daniel Rutley, author o f Escaping
Em otional Entrapment and Ruth
Stockdale, director of Single Adults
Alive.
Rutley, a psychotherapist, is an
authority in the field of personal devel
opment and life enhancement.
For more than two decades, he has
used a direct and straightforward
approach in his private practice, lectures
and seminars. Using humour and a play
ful style, he has helped thousands gain
the emotional control that leads to a life
of fulfillment.
He is currently a regular guest on
CTS’ Rhonda Live (Channel 26) on
Tuesdays from 2-3 p .m. and
Over 65?
Free-up Capital.
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Wednesdays at 10:30-11:30 a.m.
Meanwhile, Stockdale comes to sin
gles ministry from 20 years of leader
ship in the business community, with
experience in adult education and gov
ernment lobbying.
Over the past five years. Stockdale
has dedicated herself to the concerns
and issues related to living as a
Christian single in a couples world.
She speaks at seminars and confer
ences and is currently completing a
book addressing the challenges and
opportunities of single living. She chal
lenges her audience to embrace both
personal and spiritual growth.
Early bird price for the seminar is
$49 (at the door $65. including work
shops, workbook, panel discussions.
Continental breakfast, lunch, and an
evening party launching the new CD of
John Himanen and his band, Onesimus.
To register, call 905-639-8244 or e-mail
[email protected].
The Body Shaping Fitness Studio For Women.
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183 Lakeshore Road West, Oakville, Ontario L6K 1E7
Qust East o f Dorval)
w w w .b o d y s h a p in g s tu d io .c o m