F A L L 2 0 1 3
the
Greenbriar Alumni
Association
Board Members
Board members of the Greenbriar
Alumni Association is comprised
as follows:
Interim Leadership
Committee
As the Alumni Association enters its fourth year, we continue to
grow and evolve. It is encouraging to see our numbers grow and
the enthusiasm remain high. We have also had the privilege of
getting all our sites involved and look forward to more Alumni
joining us.
The Interim Leadership Committee continues to discuss the
growth and direction of the Alumni Association. There are
some new and exciting things happening. We hope that you, the
Alumni, will help in making your Alumni Association a success.
We have visited the Greenbriar outpatient sites and have
increased our numbers. It is truly inspiring to see the level of
commitment and involvement shown to make your Alumni
Association a success. We look forward to working with the
alumni from all of the sites, and to keep you abreast of your
Alumni Association.
President:
Vice President:
Treasurer:
Secretary:
Pat M.
Eldon K.
Bill S.
Maggi G.
Members:
Melvin B.
David B.
Chris D.
Zale L.
Jon W.
A warm welcome to the new
Committee Members!!
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FALL 2016
The Interim Leadership Committee has
been asked to help with several service
projects, and we would appreciate your
continued help in those efforts:
A special THANK YOU to
the
Alumni
Association
Secretary, Maggi G. and Emily
K. for updating the Alumni
database. This was a huge
undertaking and their time and
effort is greatly appreciated.
However, our database can only be as current and
accurate as the information we possess. Therefore, if
you need to change your address, telephone number,
or email address, please contact Romaine at the
Brentwood office (412-885-7180). We will make sure
that those changes are made immediately. If you
know someone who may not have access to the online
version of this newsletter, or the emailed version,
please pass the word
that we can easily
make the database
changes.
The Interim Committee is VERY
INTERESTED in hearing from you …
the Alumni. If you have a service
project or idea for promoting the
Alumni Association and keeping it
moving forward, please see one of the
above members, or as always, give
Romaine @ Brentwood a call (412885-7180). The success of any
endeavor is a reflection of its
members… SO GET INVOLVED.
2
ü Clothes Closet:
Thank you for all of the past
donations. We are still amazed at
your generosity in supporting this
service project. As of right now, the
main site is not in need of any
clothing or miscellaneous toiletry
items. However, that could change
at any time and we will keep you
updated.
ü Library Collection:
One of the truly successful service
projects undertaken by the Alumni
Association was the dedication of
our lounge area at Greenbriar’s
Inpatient facility. This space is used
as a library / respite area that
allows our inpatient folks a
wide range of books,
magazines, and puzzles.
Donations are ongoing and
you may bring your
materials to the Brentwood
office, or any of our
outpatient offices. We will
make
sure
that
the
materials all get to our
Inpatient facility. If you
are doing some winter
house cleaning and trying
to make room for new
books, magazines, and
puzzles, we would love to
have your discards.
THE LOREM IPSUMS
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Groundbreaking of the
new Detox building
September 18th, 2013
A groundbreaking ceremony took place on
September 18, 2013 to commemorate the
beginning construction of a new detox
building at Greenbriar Treatment Center
Gary Weinstein
CEO, Washington Health System
Mary Banaszak
CEO, Greenbriar Treatment Center
In 1999 4% of our admissions were patients
suffering from an opioid addiction. By 2012,
that percentage grew to a stunning rate of
56% of all patients. The opioid problem has
reached epidemic proportions. More and
more people need treatment, which means a
more difficult time finding a rehabilitation
center with openings. Greenbriar Treatment
Center and the Washington Health System
have collaborated to find a solution to this
public health crisis.
Brandon Neuman
PA House of Representatives
A new state of the art Detoxification
building is being erected next to the
current facility in Washington, PA.
By building a new facility, strictly for
detox patients, 14 beds will be opened
in our main building, giving us the
capacity to treat 76 patients at the
Residential and Detox levels.
This new Detox facility provides
another opportunity for people
suffering from addiction to change
their life by starting the journey of
recovery.
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Continuing Care “Eatin Meetin” Event
The Brentwood Continuing Care Group
began an “Eatin Meetin” night on the
second Tuesday of every month. This
is modeled after the very successful
“Eatin Meetin” night, which started at
our Squirrel Hill outpatient site. The
Brentwood Day Partial Program is also
considering
an
“Eatin
Meetin”
Continuing Care day.
This is an
opportunity to sit back, eat, socialize,
relax and unwind. We have kept these
Tuesdays more broad based with
respect to discussion topics. Squirrel
Hill has also paired up alumni with
current outpatient group members
during these “Eatin Meetin” nights in
an attempt to get people more
acquainted with living recovery outside
of the treatment structure.
We would appreciate hearing from
all of the alumni from each of our
sites, with what your thoughts and
experiences have been with this
concept. Do we need to make any
changes to the format, more food
(ha ha), etc.? As other site
programs begin implementing this
concept, it would help to know
what works and what does not. So
please take a few minutes and give
us an honest critique.
Greenbriar Alumni Association – Day at the Ball Park
The Greenbriar Alumni Association sponsored a day at the ballpark on Sunday, July 14th. Alumni and
Greenbriar staff braved the heat and sun for a fun afternoon at PNC Park. This was a wonderful
opportunity for alumni and staff to partake in an afternoon of fun and fellowship. Unfortunately, the
Pirates came up a little short and lost to the New York Mets. However, it was a wonderful afternoon and
we are already planning next year’s Alumni Day at the Ball Park!
A special THANK YOU to the President of the Alumni Association, Pat M., for arranging the reduced
price tickets and coordinating this year’s Alumni Day at the Ball Park.
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Have a “BOO”tiful Time In
Recovery
Halloween … supposedly the scariest time of year. The
only time of the year that dressing up and demanding candy
for doing so is considered
“cute.” I do not even want to guess how much
money is spent on Halloween. Between the costumes, the
decorations and the candy – that you have to keep buying
because you ate the first six bags that you bought – this
holiday runs into the MILLIONS. And that is just for the
kids’ portion of the holiday. What about the adults? The
parties, ghoulish greeting cards, novelties and again with
the costumes.
I remember growing up and dressing up and going
from door to door with my bag and rating the neighbors on
the type and brand of candy that they dispensed. This was
before those ‘bite size’ candy bars – whoever came up with that one? When I want
a candy bar, I want a candy bar. If I only wanted a bite of a candy bar I would take a bite out of someone
else’s. Jeez! In my neighborhood, all the kids went door to door together. There were no chaperones.
No one was using a flashlight to illuminate the
walkways. We just walked, knocked,
yelled trick or treat, took our candy and
moved to the next house. No
adults allowed. Now, I see more
adults walking with the
kids and I get a bit nostalgic. For
me that was a simpler
time.
Halloween every day,
Being in addiction is like
on steroids, without the candy,
and the endless masks.
Today, however, I can look
forward to this holiday
again. My kids will dress up and go
out and get me candy.
Sounds fair – I feed them every day.
My wife will decorate the
yard like a cemetery. Sounds fair – I
should have been dead many
times over during my addiction. My kids will pester
me to tell ghost stories. Sounds fair – I
found that I was a great storyteller in my addiction, though I was unable to detect reality from fantasy.
My wife will want to improvise with making costumes for the kids. The kids will rebel. I’ll step outside
and spider web the bushes.
(Cont’d)
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THE LOREM IPSUMS
FALL 2016
(Cont’d)
I got to thinking, however, about the characters and costumes out on the
market today. There is always the “Little Mermaid.” Could never
understand why she is never wet. Unless… I saw Harry Potter is still big.
Isn’t he like 42 now? All-time favorite – Yoda. That is what I called my
first sponsor! X-Men – we called them narcs. X-Men with dogs were
narcs with dogs. How about Shrek? Big, bloated and green – just the
memory I want to bring back into consciousness! Iron Man… thought
that was a misprint and should have read “Iron City Man.” Batman
remains a top seller. Yeah, wearing a cape and tights will turn heads.
And what about the skeleton costume? “This is you on heroin,” should be
the tagline. Ninjas would be cool, though I suspect the accessories would
be forbidden, and then it would just be you in pajamas. I saw a “Jailbird”
costume in one of the catalogs and no good thoughts came to mind.
I like the M&M costumes that have been around the past couple of
years. Unfortunately, I have an overwhelming fear that my M&Ms will
talk to me after I see their commercial. Some of you younger folks may
not remember, but Darth Vader was the #1 costume in the 1970’s.
Everyone, I mean everyone, wanted be Darth. I am not sure whether it
was the all black garb or the mask that distorted your voice but tripping on
something (like maybe those weird mushrooms that were around at the
time) and seeing a neighborhood of Darth Vader’s was enough so scare
anyone straight.
There are quite a few AA / NA sponsored Halloween parties and I hope to see you there. I may be
in costume or not. Find me and find out!!!! In the meantime, HAPPY HALLOWEEN! … Hey, is that
an M&M on the floor?
DAVE R.
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We have one month left in our 2000 Turkey Campaign.
Since there are so many new employees and alumni, we want
to start out by telling you that this will be the third year that the
employees of Greenbriar Treatment Center have given a
donation to this wonderful cause! This year, we would like to
include the alumni association in our efforts as well.
2000 Turkeys is an organization that supplies a turkey dinner to
families in our area that are struggling financially, so that they
can enjoy Thanksgiving. They have been doing this since
1983! For the past 3 years, we have been collecting
“pennies” from all of the employees and using that for our
donation! Last year we donated $425. Here we are in October,
and we are currently at $293.24. We have quite a way to go to
catch up to last year. We are challenging all of you right
now. Please see if YOU can collect at least $2.00 in the next
few weeks! If everyone does that, we can surpass last year!!!!
So, post this where everyone can see it and send in your
pennies!!!!!
THANK YOU for all of your help!!!!!!!!!
- Jamie Clark
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Speakers Forum
The Greenbriar Alumni Association continues to work with our Inpatient
facility to provide speakers for the residents on the second Saturday of every
month. Since taking on this service commitment, the Alumni provided our
Inpatient residents with some great speakers, and everyone who was asked
to speak gladly took up the service request. We are already almost through
2013, and the speakers so far have again lived up to expectations with
respect to sharing their experience, strength and hope. If you are interested
in participating in this rewarding project, please contact Pat M.
This is a perfect opportunity for you, the Alumni, to get active and involved
and share your experience, strength and hope with someone who may be
struggling and unsure of learning to live life on life’s terms.
An Interim Committee member will be available to go with you to our
Inpatient facility if you agree to speak and would like someone to attend,
to introduce you to our Inpatient staff and residents. As we have all learned
in order to keep your sobriety you have to give it away, and this is a fun and
exciting way to show that recovery does work … if you work it!
Getting Involved in the Greenbriar Alumni
Association
Getting active and involved is easy. If you are reading this newsletter you
may already be a member and are on our Alumni email list. You may
have received a copy in the mail, or you may have pilfered a copy from
one of our outpatient sites! Just kidding – the newsletters are free!!!! It
does not matter – WE WANT YOU! If you are not a member of the
Alumni Association, joining is easy. Please fill out the application included
in this newsletter and bring it with you
to Continuing Care. If you are already a
member and know of someone who may not
have seen our Newsletter in print or on our
website, why not encourage them to join too?
It is a fun and exciting way to pass on what
you have received and to meet new people.
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Alumni Poets
Thanks to Jon W. from our Squirrel Hill location for inaugurating The Alumni Poets and contributing
to this Newsletter feature ….
Dreams
The young man, so full of hopes and dreams and expectations,
does what those around him tell him to do.
Gets a job and a paycheck and a girlfriend and tries to
build a strong foundation for the future.
One horrible mistake, and in the wink of an eye, it all evaporates.
A little older, he starts to rebuild; a new career, a new paycheck,
and a new woman parts the clouds of his life.
A new home, new friends, and a puppy named Grace.
Because he feel touched by God’s grace.
And, once again, his world shattered by the cruelty of life.
Starting over is hard, but what choices are there?
*
*
*
Looking back on his life, he remembers an old flame
that made him feel young and quickened his pulse.
Where is she, what is she doing, does she remember me?
You try to reconnect, but it’s not the same.
Time and life have altered both your worlds and, try as you will,
The old flame has died and the spark is gone.
The bitter taste of disappointment, like fruit yet to ripen.
Never realizing what might have been.
Might have, should have, could have, would have.
Feeling tired and defeated, the old man moves on.
But where is the wisdom that is supposed to come with age?
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Life Is a Journey…
Life is a journey. Always going forward, never back.
Existen ce is a har d thing to keep when you stop trying.
To live a life, you must want to live.
To want to live you must find a way.
When all hope seems lost you must stand tall.
When all others retreat you must prevail.
You are the conscious inside your head.
You create your own destiny.
Life is a very hard thing to keep.
When your life does not always go the way you plan,
fight for your life and right to keep dreaming.
If you feel you were gifted, share the gift.
If you feel you were cursed, fix it.
As you get old, your life becomes a challenge.
Who are you?
What will you be?
What is your purpose in life?
If you worry, these things will turn into burdens.
But if you hold on to them in the back of your mind,
all the an swer s will come in time.
Life is a journey, always going forward, never goin g back.
Look to the future not to the past.
Pete D .
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A VOICE IN OUR EAR
I am a member of Narcotics Anonymous.
After a recent meeting, I was listening to someone
in early recovery; someone who was a little
frustrated with bad choices. This person said, “I
wish I could just have a voice in my ear telling me
what to do each day.”
It occurred to me that, in NA, we do. We do
have a voice available to us. The voice of our
Higher Power and the voice of our “we.” It takes
time, however, to recognize that voice. It takes
practice. That’s one of the reasons it is suggested in
early recovery that we go to a meeting each day, if
we can.
When we come out of our addiction into
recovery, we are not usually in conscious contact
with our Higher Power. We’re barely conscious, period. Even those of us who had a
relationship with our Higher Power before using became distant from it in order to use.
We lost touch.
We usually don’t have a functional “we.” Most of our so-called friends were using.
Maybe most of them still are. Even if we had a “we,” we distanced ourselves from it to
use. We lost touch.
So, we have to reconnect or connect for the first time. That takes time. But we can
come to meetings and hear that voice speaking to us through others…. Telling us what’s
good for us…. Telling us things like, “Don’t pick up.” Telling us things that will save our
lives….
It will tell us many, many other things… each and every day. If we give it
opportunity. If we listen. But to hear that voice clearly takes practice. Sometimes it takes
some help. Perhaps from our sponsor or our new friends in NA.
So, we have available to us exactly what that person was wishing for. A voice in
our ear, each day. To comfort us, to help us, to guide us on a path toward living and
enjoying life without the use of drugs. But we can only hear it if we listen.
Bob B.
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LOOK … What’s Happening with the Greenbriar Alumni Association …
Members of the Greenbriar Alumni Association have been meeting to brainstorm some future events
for the Alumni Association. Some of what the members have been discussing includes –
Walk-a-Thon to Recovery
Speaker Jams
Christmas Party (4th Annual)
As the Greenbriar Alumni Association continues to meet, we again ask for your input into events that
you would like to help organize and execute. Time is a commodity that we all seem to struggle with
finding enough of it to go around. However, without our recoveries we may be doing time, so we ask that
you put the Greenbriar Alumni Association involvement on your “TO DO LIST” and JUST DO IT!
SAVE THE DATE ……
The 4th Annual Greenbriar Alumni Association Christmas Party is scheduled for
December 13, 2013.
Friday,
The festivities will begin at 6:00pm at the South Hills Outpatient
site of Greenbriar.
We will again be distributing sign-up sheets for covered dishes, desserts and the like.
This year, the Alumni Association will be raffling off a FANTASTIC prize to benefit our Men’s
and Women’s Halfway House Dental Fund, and there will be exciting door prizes. Please mark your
calendars and Save the Date to join us for an evening of holiday frivolity and good
fellowshipping. Remember, the Christmas Party is family friendly so bring your spouse/partner.
More details on the Christmas Party will follow. If you know of alumni who may not receive the
newsletter, please pass along the date and encourage attendance.
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Alumni to Alumni
I met up with Georgie at the Sunday evening Women’s NA meeting at the Onala Club where she
was holding court with her sponsee. As I walked across the room I could image what she was telling this
young lady: “call me before you use – if you call after you use you can expect me to hang up on you and
wait until you are ready listen.” I heard those words myself, and smiled as I recalled my early recovery
journey under Georgie’s watchful eyes.
Georgie will tell you that she was rehab junkie – in and out, in and out. It was not until she died a
third time, before she began to take her sobriety and recovery seriously. “I did well at Inpatient. I enjoyed
the community feel of a rehabilitation center, and I have been to many of them. I knew I was safe and the
telephone would not ring, and I had someone to talk to 24 / 7. Getting out of rehab was my real
problem.”
Georgie celebrated 7 years of continuous sobriety on June 14th. I asked her to share with us her
experience, strength and hope in her trials and tribulations of recovery.
Georgie has no hesitation in telling you that she is 49 years old and considers herself “lucky” that
she was finally able to put together a few one days at a time, considering that “most dopers don’t live this
long…. I guess my Higher Power had other plans for me.” She ended up at Greenbriar’s door through the
legal system – again – and believes that she had an epiphany after she was detoxed and began her
residential treatment. “I looked around and noticed I was the oldest person there – even the staff appeared
younger. I take that back … yeah, they looked young but also a hell of a lot healthier than me. I was a
mess.” They tell us in the program that we will begin to take it seriously when the pain gets too great and
Georgie concurs, “I stopped being a wife, a mother, a daughter, a human being. The drugs controlled
what I did, who I did it with, where, when, every f***ing thing I did. Dope as a Higher Power – I don’t
recommend it!”
After 28 days of Inpatient treatment, Georgie grudgingly agreed to Outpatient treatment. “This is
the one piece I never did. I would complete Inpatient and believe I could do it on my own. Each time I
was wrong. So, I figured this time, why not?” Georgie believes that outpatient gave her enough structure
to be accountable all day to her treatment group, and had the time to establish herself in the NA program
in the evenings. “By the time I was ready to be discharged to return to work, I had my core group ready to
help me get back into life.” Georgie’s family came to Greenbriar on her last day to see her marbled out of
treatment, and cried when she exclaimed, “I’m Georgie and an addict and loving every day reconnecting
with my families – the one I live with and the one that keeps me alive.”
As I thanked Georgie for her time and story for this edition of the Alumni to Alumni, she thanked
me for keeping her humble and hungry for recovery. Her parting words were “don’t pick up, go to
meetings,
call
your
sponsor
and
enjoy
another
day
clean
and
sober.”
Thanks Georgie, for your openness and willingness to share your experience, strength, and hope
with the Greenbriar recovering community.
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Alumni Association Briefs
«
HELP: We are experiencing some confusion with respect to alumni receiving, in a timely fashion,
notices of upcoming events, copies of the newsletter, etc. and we need to make sure our information on
you is current. Confirm your email and / or home address in our database by contacting Romaine at
412-885-7180. If you are reading this, please pass it on to those alumni who we are trying to reach.
Hopefully, we will be in a position soon to contact all registered alumni and update our records.
«
LOOKING TO GET INVOLVED: We are currently working with the folks at our Inpatient
facility to help book speakers for the weekends. If you are interested in participating in this service
project, please contact Pat M., President of the Alumni Association or Romaine at Brentwood (412-8857180). We have agreed to one weekend day each month (second Saturday of a particular month),
wherein the Alumni Association would be responsible to provide speakers. Any questions you have can
be directed to Ron or Romaine, and we are excited about this opportunity and hope to get the schedule
full. See
Speakers Forum.
«
Check it Out:
«
We are still looking for contributions to the Newsletter from you - the Alumni Association. Please feel
free to provide poems, stories, pictures, jokes (keep it clean!), thoughts, whatever you want to provide.
«
We are looking for new members to the Alumni Association. If you know of someone who would like
to participate in the Alumni Association, please let us and them know!!
«
In addition to the Alumni Association’s link on Greenbriar’s website, we are also now on Facebook.
Facebook is a great way to keep in touch with friends and Greenbriar itself. You can ‘friend’ us and
then you will be able to get updates on Alumni Association service projects and upcoming events, prior
to the Newsletter publication. It has all the same bells and whistles that you are probably familiar with,
and we hope you will take advantage of another means of keeping in touch and giving back.
Greenbriar Treatment Center’s Information Technology group has created a link to
our home page on the Internet for the Alumni Association. Now more Alumni will have access to our
Newsletter, and find that belonging to the Alumni Association is an easy way of giving back. It is
posted on Greenbriar Treatment Center’s website. Pass the word @ www.greenbriar.net
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WANTED – NEEDED – WANTED – NEEDED
In the AA Big Book and NA Basic Text, we are told that working with and helping the still
struggling alcoholic / addict is our best defense. The newcomer reminds us where we were, and that we
could easily be there again without our recovery programs. It is ironic that once we get clean and sober,
time takes on a different meaning. There does not seem to be enough of it (did you ever wonder how you
found time to use!). Between work and family, recreational and social activities, we can believe that
attending meetings and talking before and after the meeting is enough. We may even pick up the
telephone and call some people in the program. However, taking on service positions or projects are in
our
view, a little too time consuming and we may let others in the program do the
heavy lifting.
Making a commitment to our recovery program takes time and
energy. But what about a service commitment that does not require
much of your time? Are you interested?
At any given time, we have 55 to 60 still suffering addicts in our
Inpatient facility. Some are still in detox and some are finishing up their Inpatient
stay and getting ready to transfer to one of our Outpatient sites. It is very transient as people come and go
– sometimes quickly sometimes slowly! The Greenbriar Alumni Association has been asked to help by
providing AA Big Books and NA Basic Texts for our Inpatient residents. The contributions to the
Inpatient Library have been phenomenal, and the library is a big hit with our residents. However, the cost
of replacing AA and NA books can be daunting and it would be a wonderful way for you to give back by
purchasing and donating to our Inpatient facility, a copy or two of the Big Book and / or Basic Text. Are
you still interested?
For less than $10 you may provide someone with the most important book they will ever own.
What do you think? Is this something you would be willing to do? I am sure that some of you reading
this had someone purchase your first AA or NA book. Are you willing to pay it forward? Bill S., Vice
President of the Alumni Association, is chairing this committee.
You have several options available: You can give $10 towards the purchase of an AA Big Book or
NA Basic Text. You could also bring the $10 to any Continuing Care Tuesday evening program, and the
books will be purchased and taken to our Inpatient facility. If you have extra copies or are willing to
purchase new copies, we would be happy to take them as well. Again, you can give them to Bill S. or
bring them to Continuing Care. Finally, if you are in the vicinity of the Inpatient facility in Washington,
PA, you can drop off the books / money. Anonymity is the cornerstone of the fellowship and it is your
choice if you want your name placed in the book (“Donated by Alumni Jane/John D.”). We will not
place your name in the book without your consent.
Please help the still suffering alcoholic / addict and help to contribute
to this worthy service request. Any questions can be addressed to Romaine at
Brentwood (412-885-7180).
A SPECIAL THANK YOU to those alumni who have donated Big
Books, Daily Reflections and Basic Texts to this very worthy cause.
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God Winks
Author Squire Rushnell coined the term “God Winks,” to describe those times when you receive “what
some call coincidence or an answered prayer, as a direct and personal message of reassurance from God to
you” (p. 3). An alumni member shared with me Mr. Rushnell’s book “When God Winks at You,” and
shared her personal God Winks story. This section has become a favorite of many of our readers. You
can check out past God Winks in our earlier newsletters by visiting our website (www.greenbriar.net and
click on the ALUMNI tab). Inspired, other alumni continue to share their personal God Winks stories.
Enjoy this edition of “God Winks” My God Wink
I heard a definition for resentment that stuck with me: Resentment is
like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. I thought that
apropos with respect to the people in my life that seemed to have better jobs,
better spouses / partners, fancier clothes, newer cars, more money and the list
could go on and on. I thought that life was unfair, and the people who did
not deserve such earthly rewards just seemed to get more and more and I felt
less and less. I did not realize how bitter I had become until …
I work for a small town road crew, which is responsible for keeping the borough streets clean of
debris, leaves and snow, the parks pristine including the “out houses” and trash receptors, potholes tarred
and sewer drained cleaned and all the added “extras” that are never clearly defined at the job interview. I
had graduated from college with a degree in Accounting and I was cleaning up someone else’s discarded
McDonalds bag! How did my life go so wrong? I thought I would be sought after by the bigger firms for
my internship the first semester of my senior year. Instead, I was interning for a one-man accounting
office that had as its biggest client, a wealthy widow, who I believe, could outsmart the accountant and
then some. I think she just needed some social interaction and a twice-monthly appointment with her
“financial advisor.” I got to make photocopies – collating and stapling too! Had to make sure there was
always fresh coffee and toilet paper in the bathroom, go to the post office for stamps and then go back and
mail what I purchased the stamps for (could not take the stuff and mail it when I purchased the stamps –
that would have made too much sense!). I was the go-fer – go for this, that and whatever else.
I made it through the internship and finished up my studies graduating with a 4.0! Look out
financial world, I was on my way. I sent out my resume, posted it on Monster, made numerous telephone
calls and … nothing. Not a bite, not a nibble. This went on for an agonizing six months. I kept hearing
that an opening may occur and I would be considered, but nothing materialized. I heard that this
classmate scooped up this job, and that classmate was on a partner track, and I still had a pile of maybes
and a bigger stack of sorry the job has been filled. I was a loser with a big L. I was embarrassed when I
ran into people I went to college with, when they asked about my work. I didn’t have any.
(cont’d)
17
THE LOREM IPSUMS
FALL 2016
(cont’d)
I guess that is when the resentment started to take hold and become a part of who I was. I was
miserable and made sure that everyone else knew it. You could feel it in my presence. I was becoming
more desperate for work and the madder I got as my possibilities began to dwindle. I received a telephone
call from my brother – THE LAWYER – who told me that the borough where we grew up was hiring.
Me, a maintenance guy? He had to be kidding. I heard pity in his voice when he said, “until you find
something.” I felt even worse when the borough accepted my telephone inquiry and asked that I come in
for an interview. They must be more desperate than me – though I did not think that possible. It was
probably a pity job. Someone owed my brother a favor. My brother…THE LAWYER.
I interviewed with the borough manager on a Tuesday and started work on Wednesday. I did not
call my brother to tell him I got the job – let him find out from whoever did him a “favor.” The road crew
is comprised of 25 men of varying ages and they all seemed to know each other and I was expecting the
cold shoulder. I showed up at 6:00 a.m. and the few guys who were already there said hello, and one
pointed to my locker. He said that my official clothing would not be in for a week and if I could, just to
wear jeans and a shirt that I didn’t mind getting dirty. I said okay. He stuck out his hand and introduced
himself. The other guys there rang out their names too. I mumbled something.
Spring was around the corner when I was hired and we had a lot of work to do as the winter
months did a number on the roads and sewers. I figured being low man on the totem pole that I would get
the crappy assignments that no one wanted. Much to my surprise the crew leader asked for volunteers on
the bigger jobs and guys chimed in with enthusiasm. It did not seem to bother them that cleaning sewers
was not typically something someone looked forward to doing. No one “volunteered” the new guy and
by the time the jobs were divided up, I was on the truck cleaning detail. Everyone joked around and no
one singled me out. This pissed me off too! First day done and I was out the door. I went back because I
had to go back if I wanted to eat and pay the rent.
I kept showing up. Guys kept volunteering. Jokes flew. I hustled and did my part. I
found myself getting better upper body strength. I was tanning and tuning up and did not
even recognize it. By the end of summer, I was one of the guys. It started slowly.
They talked and I answered. Then I found myself initiating conversations. I told a
few jokes. We went out after work a couple of times.
Today I am the borough manager. I stayed with road crew and obtained
seniority as some guys retired and some moved on. I got to know people and they got
to know me. The road crew old-timers remind me that I started with an attitude and
they gave me my space until I was ready to rejoin the human race. I can see today that
I had to work out my resentments with the hard work and physical labor, for which the
road crew was responsible. When the borough manager position became available, the
mayor approached me – I had the knowledge of the borough and its needs and an accounting background
that they were looking for in a manager. I had unrealistic expectations when I was in college and did not
even recognize them until I was humbled. None of us is promised an easy way to contentment. Today I
see humbleness as a virtue. Sometimes you have to clean out a few sewers in order for the light to shine.
•
Sammy Q.
If anyone would like to submit your own God Winks story,
please contact Romaine (412-885-7180) and we will make sure
that your God Winks story appears in an upcoming issue of
the Alumni Newsletter.
18
Monthly Thoughts
It’s the Holiday Season, yet again… most of your Family Members are Not
Equipped to Deal with Your Addiction
Then Who IS??????… People who have experienced addiction first hand.
This time of year we all face get-togethers with Family and Friends. One of the biggest
temptations is to “be apart of” so to speak, by using whatever drug may be at your
gathering. After all, no one will know right?
I know that this is not a perfect world and some of our Family members use alcohol or other drugs.
We may have to face situations that, especially in early Recovery, will confuse and confound us. Our
Families are the easiest ones in our lives to manipulate, and the reasons for this is because we know
exactly what buttons to push to have them “let us use.” We installed these buttons; we know how hard to
push them and where to push. We use events from our past to guilt Family, or make ourselves such a pain
in the ass our loved ones just give in.
One great thing about your WE and others in 12 Step is that they do not Love you like your Families
do. Odd statement huh? Well, let me explain. I’m in 12 Step and I love everyone that comes to a meeting
but I don’t like everyone that comes to a meeting. I will use the principles of 12 Step with you so that you
will have a very difficult time manipulating me. You can’t pull the guilt trip on me like you can on your
parents when you evoke the trump cards of your childhood. You never paid attention to me. You weren’t
there for me, you loved my sister more than me, I never felt loved and other pity ploys.
This year, be sure to include 12 Step meetings in your Holiday. There are plenty of meetings on
Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year etc., right after your turkey dinner. We all need support, We all need
help and We all need each other, especially in the Holiday Season to Recover. You wouldn’t go to a
plumber to fix your electric, so don’t go to your Family to Recover…. go to your We, Sponsor and
Meetings. Families are great for many wonderful things, but if Family was the preferred tool for Recovery
why do we use them and hurt them to get high?
Happy Holidays Fellow Recovering People
*RC
Greenbriar Alumni Association
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