Download Report

You,You,You
How to
Radiate
Killer
Confidence
This babe
isn’t seeking
approval.
BY KELLY THORE
In a recent interview, No
Strings Attached actress Lake
Bell admitted that when she’s scared,
she taps in to her inner Angelina Jolie
for strength. That struck a chord with
some of us Cosmo staffers, because
we’ve done the exact same thing. And
we’re not the only ones who use Angie
as a secret mojo source. After all, it’s
hard to imagine an actress who, both
onscreen and off, is more determined
to achieve her goals, even when
they’re ridiculously ambitious. “She’s
the chick who fearlessly pursues what
she pleases, whether anyone likes it
or not, and always comes out on top,”
says psychologist Sheenah Hankin,
PhD, author of Complete Confidence.
“Her confidence is palpable. It’s only
natural that she’s become an empowering icon for women.”
No one is saying that Angie’s life
is perfect (daddy issues and blood
vials come to mind…). And let’s not
forget that she’s done things we
158 COSMOPOLITAN / JUNE 2011
don’t condone (ahem, man stealing).
We’re just suggesting that if you’ve
never asked yourself “What would
Angie do?” in a clutch moment when
your confidence was lagging, maybe
it’s time you did.
Rebel Role Model
One thing we envy about Angie is
that she doesn’t follow the rules.
“On one hand, you have prim and
proper actresses, and then you have
her way over on the other side—
with tattoos and a little rough
around the edges—rebelling against
that idea of perfection,” says Carole
Lieberman, MD, author of Bad
Girls: Why Men Love Them and
How Good Girls Can Learn Their
Secrets. “She just said ‘Screw it all’
and decided to do whatever and
look however she wants, which is an
urge we all have.” Yes, there are
other badass celebrities whom we
love and look up to (see Cameron
Diaz, page 40), but when it comes
to totally shameless gutsiness, Angie
is on a whole different level.
Regardless of where she is—
looking fierce at an awards show or
standing in her front yard in a silk
bathrobe—Angie oozes strength and
sexiness. “She has a seductive allure
to her that women would kill for,”
says Hankin. It’s clear the sheer willfulness of her movie characters
comes from her, not anything written
in a script or dictated by a director.
It’s not Lara Croft or Mrs. Smith
whooping ass, it’s Angelina Jolie. You
can easily imagine her walking off the
red carpet, hopping onto a motorcycle, and using a parked car to
wheelie onto an overpass.
And then there’s the fact that she
has everything a woman could possibly want…times 10. She didn’t just
get the guy, she got Brad Pitt, the
sexiest man in the universe. She didn’t
just balance a career and kids, she
balanced being an Oscar-winning
A++-list actress, all while raising a
brood of six, traveling the world, raking in millions, and being labeled a
saint by Bosnian refugees. And she
makes it all look easy. “Everything is
COSMOPOLITAN.COM
John Shearer/Getty Images
She may not be the
perfect role model,
but when it comes
to conjuring instant
self-assurance,
channeling Angelina
Jolie is one of the
best strategies
we’ve ever tried.
You,You,You
in excess,” says Hankin. “She’s so
over-the-top that she fulfills every
fantasy you could have.”
Channel Angie
Anytime
Whether you find fault in her or not,
tapping in to this chick’s überconfidence can still score you serious
boosts. “Imagining what she’d do in a
sticky situation can help you drum up
the strength to beat your nerves,” says
self-esteem expert Catherine Cardinal, PhD, author of A Cure for the
Common Life. So how do you do it?
Step one: Steal her body language.
Remember when Jennifer Aniston was
presenting an award at the 2009 Oscars,
and the camera cut away to Angie in
the front row? “She had her shoulders
back with her chin high as she kept her
eyes on Jen and smiled. Her body
exuded confidence, which made Jennifer seem less powerful,” says Dr.
Lieberman. During awkward moments
(like when you run into the mean-girl
clique at a party), squaring your shoulders, flashing a grin, and fighting the
urge to look to friends for assurance
will make you seem more in control.
Step two: Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Take a lesson from Angie’s infamous
lip-gloss application during this year’s
Golden Globes. Well aware of all the
cameras, she made no effort to hide it
as she swiped. “Moments like that show
she’s not afraid to let people see who
she is behind the veil,” says Dr. Lieberman. Many saw it as a faux pas, but she
didn’t care—the same attitude you
should take toward your critics.
Step three: Put your best face forward. When The Tourist flopped on
opening night in the U.S., did Angie
sulk? Nope. The next week, she showed
up at the movie’s Rome premiere donning a sexy black suit, red lips, and
bombshell hair and walked that carpet
as if her flick had just won Best Picture.
“If she was disappointed in the reviews,
she didn’t show it,” says Dr. Lieber-
man. Appearing collected on the outside (even if you’re a mess inside)
shows people—and yourself—that you
N
don’t let setbacks define you.
Your GoTo Mojo
Booster
We figured you Cosmo girls
would have a few sneaky
(and excellent!) ego
enhancers of your own…
and we were so right.
“If I’m out, sometimes I’ll
bend over, shake my hands
through my hair, and pop
back up to give it volume. It’s
hard to be down when you’re
rocking big hair.”
—Ana, 20
“I’ve saved a few e-mails from
my boss where he’s complimented me for acing a
project. I reread those when
I need reassurance that I’m
great at my job.” —LeeAnn, 30
“Going somewhere private and
singing Glee-style. There’s
just something uplifting about
letting it all go.”
—Kennedy, 24
“I have a stash of fake eyelashes at my disposal for when
I’m having a blah day. They
make me feel instantly foxy.”
—Montana, 19
“The wallpaper on my phone
is a cute picture of myself.
Maybe that’s vain, but it’s a
reminder of the ‘me’ I want
to put forward.”
—Jennifer, 23
“Whenever my confidence is
flagging, I’ll go into a store
and try on a gorgeous cocktail
dress I can’t afford. Even
though I don’t buy it, it makes
me feel like a glam femme
fatale.”
—Brianna, 24