SAGE Writing Scoring Sample: 10th Grade
These writing scoring sample essays were produced by grade-level students. Annotations follow each
essay explaining the score in reference to the rubric. The essays were written in response to the SAGE
Training Test prompts, and were completed within the time recommendations in the test directions
(Argument/Opinion ≈ 60 minutes; Informative/Explanatory ≈ 30 minutes). While SAGE is not a timed
test, time estimates are provided as guidance for student writers.
Training Test Informative/Explanatory Prompt: 9-11 Grade Band
Write an informational essay on the relationship between clothing styles and developments in
clothing creation. Your essay must be based on ideas, concepts, and information from the
passage set.
Manage your time carefully so that you can
• Plan your essay
• Write your essay
• Revise and edit your essay
Your written response should be in the form of a multiparagraph essay. Spend about 30 minutes
on this essay, including the time you spend reading, planning, writing, revising, and editing.
See the Training Test to view the passage set associated with this prompt:
http://sageportal.org/
Grade 10 Student Scoring Sample
It is generally accepted that nearly every culture has some version of a robe or tunic. The
garment has been simply and relatively cheaply made by a means of one or two pieces of fabric. To
compensate for the difficulty in obtaining fabric, far less time and effort would be spent on the actual
creation of the garment. Since the advent of this type of clothing, however, people’s style and the
methods of clothes production have changed radically.
The Renaissance brought about a drastic change in common clothing. Fitted clothes became
more popular and appreciated for their style. Since fitted clothes were made by sewing several pieces of
fabric together, more fabric was needed to make the new stylish clothes. Around the 17th century,
clothing was not only fitted, but also increasingly flashy in style. With the use of embroidery and
gemstones, along with an emphasis on skilled tailoring, clothing also served as a strong indicator of
wealth and prosperity.
According to “Tailoring,” by the 19th and 20th centuries, these styles were replaced by ones
that were “restrained and practical.” The fitted style of dress remained, but there was no longer the
desire to be flamboyant with clothing. In order to ensure the best fit, consumers sought the most
renowned tailors. However, not all could afford this custom service. Making clothes at home remained a
widely used method of production. Ready-made clothing, the most prominent replacement to custom
and home-made clothing, came at different times for men and women. Toward the end of the 19th
century, as the Civil War progressed, men’s garment production changed significantly. The number of
soldiers continued to increase, so the demand for military uniforms increased as well. As a result, a
number of factories were built with the sole purpose of making military uniforms for a lower price than
making the uniforms at home. Data for standard sizes was taken from soldiers, and according to the
National Institute of Standards and Technology, certain common ratios found in the measurements
allowed for the “first commercial sizing scales for men.”
On the other hand, women’s transition to ready-made clothing did not occur until well into the
1920s. With the rise of the urban professional class, women were spending much less time at home and
convenient ready-made clothing became “modern and fashionable.” Though some argued that mass
production of clothing would result in a loss of individuality, there was enough support for the
convenience and affordability to overcome that concern. Without the use of personal tailoring through
the whole process of garment creation, poor fit remained an issue—especially for women. As the article
from the National Institute of Standards and Technology notes, though, the solution to this problem
came in 1937, when the U.S. Department of Agriculture developed a standardized sizing system. As the
decades progressed, so did the fashions. Factories took over the duty of making military uniforms, and
eventually women’s ready-made clothing became more available as well. Today, men and women can
order clothes online with only a few simple measurements. Tomorrow, who knows? What we do know,
though, is that fashions and the way in which they are produces will continue to change.
Total Essay Score: 4 – Highly Proficient
Explanation of Scoring:
Statement of Purpose/Focus and Organization: Highly Proficient
The first paragraph clearly introduces the controlling idea. The student maintains focus on this idea
throughout the rest of the essay, communicating the purpose effectively and addressing the audience in
an appropriate manner. Transitions are used effectively to clarify the relationships between ideas and to
link ideas together in a logical manner. By organizing the essay chronologically, the student logically
presents ideas from beginning to end. The student also varies sentence structure, helping to connect
ideas and keep the reader’s attention.
Evidence/Elaboration: Highly Proficient
The student incorporates a wide range of information and does so authentically and smoothly. The
information is comprehensive, integrating direct quotations and paraphrases of information to support
the controlling idea clearly and consistently. The student also does not include extraneous information,
which makes the expression of the ideas clear and precise. The language used is clear and effective for
its purpose.
Editing/Conventions: Highly Proficient
The student consistently applies grade-appropriate grammar and usage, demonstrating adequate
command of language conventions.