1. family and parenting
2. children

Support
Education
Hope
Summer 2014
Volume 23, Issue 2
When Your Child is Grieving:
Important Considerations for Parents of Grieving Children
Table of
Contents
Children & Grief
1-2
Volunteer Feature
2-3
Memorials and
Donations
3
Remembering Our
Babies– Birthdays
4
New Arrivals
4
Remembering Our
Babies-Angel Dates
5
Birdies for Charity
5
Walk for the Future
6
Walk for the FutureDes Moines
7
Support Groups
7
Walk Registration:
Mail Pre-Registrations to:
Iowa SIDS Foundation
406 SW School Street
Suite 207
Ankeny, IA 50023
-or-
Register On-Line at:
www.iowasids.org
Pre-registration ends on
August 16, 2014.
Follow us on
Facebook!
Our lives consist of beginnings and endings. Many of them we share with our children:
the beginning of a summer vacation and returning home, sunrise followed by sunset.
Because death is a part of life, this, too, must be shared with our children. While our
cultures or religions have different views about what happens after death, we all share an
understanding that our bodies do not last forever. We can help our children accept the
loss of a life by providing a clear explanation of death, combined with age-appropriate
support, as they cope with the loss of a baby brother, sister, or other cherished infant.
Explaining the death of an infant
sibling or loved one can be difficult,
“If a child is old enough to love,
sensitive, and a painful process,
he or she is old enough to grieve.”
especially when parents are also
grieving. Because some adults have
- Linda Goldman, Life & Loss
problems dealing with the reality of
death themselves, they may find it
difficult to explain death to a child. Children grieve the death and react to the emotions in
the household, but they need reassurance that they are not to blame. (DeFrancis Sun B,
Richards JT, eds. 2011. Helping Children Cope with Greif when an Infant Dies (2nd ed.).
Washington, DC: National Sudden and Unexpected Infant/Child Death and Pregnancy Loss
Resource Center at Georgetown University.)
The Iowa SIDS Foundation cordially invites you to join us for an afternoon seminar titled
“When Your Child is Grieving: Important Considerations for Parents of Grieving
Children.” No child is too young to grieve, but their grief looks very different from that of
an adult. During this 90 minute presentation, participants will explore how children are
affected by and respond to the death of a sibling, how we can and why we must recognize
their grief, and how a child’s grief changes as they grow.
This event will be held at the Lakeside Center, 400 NW Lakeshore Drive, Ankeny,
beginning at 1 pm on Saturday, November 1, 2014. Speakers will include Carrie Bauer,
LBSW and Sasha J. Mudlaff, MA. Carrie is the Director of Hamilton’s Academy of Grief
and Loss. In addition to the day to day operations of the Academy, Carrie facilitates two
children’s grief groups, is involved with local schools, presents to colleges, professionals
and civic organizations on various grief topics. Prior to her work at Hamilton’s, Carrie
worked as a social worker and bereavement counselor for two Hospice programs.
Sasha is the Grief Consultant for Hamilton’s Academy of Grief and Loss where she
specializes in working with grieving children, having done so for over 20 years. She is a
third generation owner/employee in the family business, currently serving as Vice
Continued on page 2.
1
Iowa SIDS Foundation
Children’s Grief Seminar-November 1, 2014, cont.
President. In addition to her work at Hamilton’s, Sasha is very involved with schools throughout the
state of Iowa, proving education, teacher training and crisis support. She is frequently called upon as a
Children’s Grief Consultant in the Greater Des Moines area and is a national speaker on the subject of
grief and loss. She has co-authored three children’s grief books and authored several afterwards for
other books to help children in their grief journey.
Carrie and Sasha will provide insight on the following four objectives during the November presentation:
1. To gain insight into children’s normal reactions to loss and change, and learn helpful and ageappropriate ways to talk with children about grief.
2. To recognize that a child’s grief changes as they grow, and ways to support a child through
these changes.
3. To identify sources of bereavement education, resources, and support for both parents and
their children.
4. To identify ways to honor the child who died, and how to include surviving children in this
process.
The presentation will be followed by time for questions, a memorial balloon release, and light dessert
reception. No childcare will be provided, but children are welcome to attend. There is no cost to
attend this seminar, the Iowa SIDS Foundation only requests that you RSVP by October 17, 2014 to
assist with planning purposes. Families can RSVP by calling 866-480-4741 or by email at
[email protected].
A postcard invite will be mailed to families the first week of October. If you have questions, please contact the Foundation’s office at 866-480-4741. We hope you will plan on joining us for an afternoon of
education to support your child in his or her grief journey.
Foundation Features Volunteer Carol Thomas
Name:
Carol S. Thomas
I have lived in the Urbandale area for over 30 years and have
worked in the West Des Moines area for over 37 years. My
daughter Danielle passed away almost 27 years ago any my parents
have passed away in the recent years.
What do you enjoy doing in your free time? My job takes
up most of my free time, however I love doing crafts, listening to
music, taking care of my puppy, Mollie, and reading when time
permits.
How have you volunteered for the Foundation? Many
may remember Carol from leading the support groups, working
with ‘new’ parents and day care providers after Danielle’s death.
Why do you volunteer? “I have chosen to stay somewhat involved because I remember how broken I was after Danielle’s death.
I do work with Hamilton’s Academy
of
Continued on page 3.
2
Iowa SIDS Foundation
Memorials and Donations
In Memory Of
General
Donations
Elizabeth Grace Atzen
Stephanie Clifton
Ben McKay
John Deere Foundation
Exceptional
Persons, Inc./
CCR&R Region 2
Gary and Pamela
Sejkora
Rebecca Shive
Marge Steinkamp
Joey Cusick
Dr. William and Betty Cusick
Brock Adam Gould
The Wellmark Foundation/
Amy Gould Volunteer Time
United Way Donations/Employer
Pledges/Employer Matches
Ryan Dennis Mougin
Curt and Amy Bowman
Richard and Jane Gent
Brenda and Patrick Mougin
Steve Gent
In Honor of: Richard “Dick” Gent
Janice Burris
Mike Burris
Ellen Diedrichsen
Nicole Galles
Amy Gould
Dennis Mougin
Helen Wares
Kellan Rayne Christine Starrett
Jamie Lynn Estrada
Andrew Jay “A.J.” VanDerSchaaf
Betsy VanDerSchaaf
Steven VanDerSchaaf
Thank You!!
The Iowa SIDS Foundation thanks the listed individuals and businesses for their generous donations.
These donations were received as of July 1, 2014.
Foundation Features Volunteer Carol Thomas, cont.
Grief and Loss participating in their twice a year grief symposium-that seems to help me deal with
everyday trials.”
What have you learned from the families you have worked with over the years? “I
have learned so much from many of the families that I have talked with. The one thing I do know is we
never get over ‘our loss’ but things get somewhat better after dealing with the many ‘milestones’ that
we each have to get through. Even after 27 years, I still remember those ‘special’ moments that I had
with Danielle and my parents.”
What do you hope you offer to the families that you have interacted with? “ I hope
parents will know that we NEVER forget that ‘special little person’ but after many hours of healing we
can go on as a “new” and somewhat different person. Stay well and take care.”
-- Responses submitted by Carol S. Thomas
*Permission to share graphic provided by www.thanks-a-lot.com.
3
Iowa SIDS Foundation
Remembering Our Babies
September
July
Carson David Phillips
Jacoby James Sickels
Jaycee Marie Schilling
Ethan Daniel McDermott
Ryder Martin Harnish
Darian Bea O’Connell
Jordyn N. Thompson
Jessica Lynne Otto
Joshwa Izaiah Rivera
Alana P. Gonzales
Rylee Alizabeth Erwin
Brennan Charley Godfredsen
Shelby Jo McConnell
Jerome Alexander Brown
Elizabeth Grace Atzen
Catherine Elizabeth Lafferty
August
Aarie Jai Richardson
Ella Elizabeth Timm
Maggie Amelia Rose Rogerson
Shane Adam Tate
Kyler Lon Wilcox
Jennifer Lynn Dyar
Amara C. Magee
Shiana Lynn West
La’Tianna Jo’Nae Luten
Oakley Joe Van Patten
Kingston Richard Hronik
August
Analisa Ines Rodriguez
Zoey Kaye Bestland
Evan Dean Klemme
Kyle Anthony Timmons
Jared John Smith
Danielle Rose Noggle
Johnathon Oscar Danner
Kenna Reese Henss
Hope ElizaRae Ohrt
Zachary Kyle Renaud
Nolan Douglas Rubendall
Max David Bushlack
Abigail Ilene Knoop
Hunter Dean Stevens
September
Maria Irene Andersen
Johnathan Danial Prescott
Ariel Faith Rattler
Donna-Oynn Williamson
Ross “Rosco” Jacob
McGlothlen
Alec Robert Wagner
Jacob Anthony Lipski
Dominic Joseph Laurenzo
Noah James Zarate
Beth Marie Stukerjurgen
Brenden Meinecke
Warren Edwin White
Benjamin Blowers
Cody Michael Coleman
Kaleb Dean Hargens
Darran Dasan Perkins
Kayla Sue Brewer
Ashton Lavail Seaton
Chelsea Miranda Jones
Hailey Erin Lincoln
Kory Lynn Dunkin
Dylan Peter Christian Andersen
October
Cara Lynn Eddie
DaeShawn Marquis Rodriguez
Madison “Maddy” Lynn Nesbitt
Dawson John Lewis
Riley Jane-Marie Perkins
Cameron Palmer
Erika Elizabeth Story
Isaac Thomas Pressley
Samantha Alina Parks
Justin Evan Miller
Peyton Jo Lehman
Robby Matthew Miller
Robert Carl Davis III
Leavy Joel Simaj-Christianson
Ryan Allen Robinson
Avery Palmer
Jessica Lynn Sammons
Quinten Matis
Gunner Jacob Alex Nail
Cody James Beck
Matthew James Avery
Alexa Jean Jonas
Congratulations!! New Arrivals
Congratulations to Terry and Missy Jones, Davenport! They welcomed Kaia
Rose Jones to their family on February 20, 2014.
If you are interested in sharing your new family member with our readers,
please provide your baby’s name, birthdate and parents’ names to the Iowa
SIDS Foundation office. We may be reached by telephone at 866-480-4741 or
by email at [email protected].
4
Iowa SIDS Foundation
Remembering Our Babies
July
Kelly Ann Pitts
Dominick Paul McFarland, Jr.
Austin Micheal Vogt
Matthew Timothy Otten
Mariah Pickering
Rowan James Dolezal
Sydney Nicole Allen
Lauren Elizabeth Nichole Viaene
Ryan Dennis Mougin
Brooke Louise Goodyk
Logan Grant Higginbotham
Alexis Deane Rudkin
Douglas Ronald Tietge
Cole Alexander Davis
August
Jerome Alexander Brown
Devon James Hayes-Jones
Joseph Laurence Devore
Dawson Thomas Vandello
Tara Beth Schroeder
Olivia Nora Aikey
Gavin Eli Gratz
Justin Ryker Swick
Carson David Phillips
August
Caitlin Rose Davis
Thomas Jay Fallon Robinson
Joey Cusick
Cheyanne Marie Camp
Parker G. Donaldson
Jordan Lee Daniel
Steven Michael Jeneary
Caleb Richard Williams
September
Mason James Bauer
Landon Davis
Ethan Troy Livingston
Kaleb J. Peverill
Alana P. Gonzales
Hope ElizaRae Ohrt
Emily Rose Studer
Andrew Jay “A.J.” VanDerSchaaf
Evan Dean Klemme
Keaton James Wirtz
Aarie Jai Richardson
Johnathon Oscar Danner
Melissa Sue Lemon
Zachary Richard VanVleet
Benjamin Scott Meints
September
Donna-Oynn Williamson
Jacoby James Sickels
October
Jaxon Matt
Jaycee Marie Schilling
Joshwa Izaiah Rivera
Zachary D. Mohatt
Zoey Kaye Bestland
Hunter Dean Stevens
James Allen Magruder
Lane Kurt Carter
Brenden Meinecke
Mario Franisico Robles
Teagon Lee Fowler
Kingston Richard Hronik
Jordyn N. Thompson
Christopher Scott Evans
Ethan Daniel McDermott
Oakley Joe Van Patten
Darian Bea O’Connell
Alec Robert Wagner
Thaddeus Charles Ernzen
Danielle Rose Noggle
Kyler Lon Wilcox
Do you want to share your story or special memory?
The front page of this newsletter is often saved for an article titled, ‘My Perspective.’ This is an opportunity for you to share
your story, a special memory, ‘lessons learned’ on your grief journey, or other article that may bring comfort to other SIDS
and SUID families. Articles can be submitted to [email protected] or mailed to 406 SW School Street, Suite 207, Ankeny,
Iowa, 50023. Questions? Call 866-480-4741.
Iowa SIDS Foundation Qualifies for Birdies Bonus Bucks
Special thank you to all of the donors who helped the Iowa SIDS Foundation qualify for the 25%
match from Sammons Financial Group and a percentage of the tournament’s bonus bucks. The
Principal Charity Classic was held at the Waukon Club in Des Moines, May 27-June 1, 2014. Total
number of birdies for the 2014 tournament was 845. As a Foundation, our donors contributed
total pledges of $1.40 per birdie and a $1665 in flat rate donations for a total of $2,845.20. This
final amount with the match & bonus bucks will be awarded late this summer.
Special thanks to our 2014 sponsors: Gary Marker, Jill Matthias, Dennis Smith, Harry Yuan, Jessie Mireles,
Richard Kinseth, James Wachuta, Glenda Huisman, Pam Strum, Randy Payne, Myron Shields, Marcia Pitts, Kallie
Rubendall, Susan Ruchti, Jean Hanna, Deb Kozel, Lu PEverill, Scott & Patty Keeley, Linda Flatland, Beth Palmer,
James McConnell, Tony Lipski, Ron East, Scot Henss, Ryan Schon, Donn Stanley, Deanna Robey, Tony & Sandra
Mireles, Sondra Porter, Betsy VanDerSchaaf, and Mark Nagel.
5
Iowa SIDS Foundation
15th Anniversary
The 15th annual Iowa SIDS Foundation Walk for the Future-Run to Remember will be held on Saturday, August
23, 2014 in eight cities across the state of Iowa. This annual family friendly event is our primary fundraiser and
celebrates fifteen years of families walking and raising awareness for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome across the
state of Iowa. We hope you plan on joining us for a morning of remembering, reconnecting with friends, and
meeting other SIDS and SUID families. Funds raised through registration fees, donations, and pledges support the
day to day operations of providing support and education to Iowa families!
ANKENY
Wagner Park Bandshell
Registration 8:30 am - Walk 9:30 am
Walkers are encouraged to bring lawn chairs.
MASON CITY
East Park Prairie Playground
Registration 8:30 am - Walk 9:00 am
BETTENDORF
Crow Creek Park – Shelter # 1
Registration 8:00 - Walk 9:00 am
SIOUX CITY: Walk and 5K Run
Bacon Creek Park-Shelter # 1
5K Run Regis. 8:30 am - 5K Run 9:30 am
Walk Registration 8:30 am - Walk 9:30 am
CEDAR RAPIDS
Noelridge Park - Creekside Pavilion
Registration 8:15 am - Walk 9:30 am
WASHINGTON: Walk and 5K Run
Sunset Park
Run Registration 7:30 am - 5K Run 8:00 am
Walk Registration 8:00 am - Walk 9:00 am
GRINNELL
Ahrens Park
Registration 8:00 am - Walk 9:00 am
WHAT CHEER
Keokuk County Fairgrounds
Registration 8:30 am - Walk 9:00 am
HOW TO REGISTER:
1. Complete and return a paper registration. These were mailed to homes the first week of July, can be
printed from our webpage, or requested by calling 866-480-4741.
2. Pre-register on line at www.iowasids.org.
3. After August 15th, register on site the morning of the walk.
PRE-REGISTRATION BENEFITS:
SAVE MONEY!! Registration fees increase $5 per adult and $2 per child for registrations received on
or after August 16th, including those registering on walk day.
 You will receive a shirt in your preferred size. We can NOT guarantee a shirt in your size will be available if you do NOT pre-register.
 Long sleeve shirts are only available to those walkers who register by July 30, 2014.
 It helps the local walk coordinators plan and makes your wait time at the registration table shorter!

BABY’S NAMES ON WALK SHIRTS:
If you choose to have your baby’s name on the walk shirt, we must have a written parental consent on file. All
consents for the 2014 Walk must be received NO LATER than July 30th. This date is critical as the proof for
the shirt screen will be approved on August 1, 2014. If you are not sure if you have a consent on file, call 866-4804741, we would be happy to check for you.
QUESTIONS: Questions can be referred to [email protected] or by phone at 866-480-4741. There is a link
to frequently asked questions on our webpage.
6
Iowa SIDS Foundation
Ankeny Walk Changes Raffle to Silent Auction
By: Deb Kozel
The Ankeny Walk for the Future will be changing their annual raffle to a silent auction this year. There
will be twenty to thirty baskets that walkers can bid on. Each basket will have a bid sheet where the
walkers can write their initial bid and continue to outbid their friend or family member.
At the end of the Walk, the highest bidder will be announced for each basket and they will make payment
for their basket and take their basket home to enjoy. While donations continue to arrive an example of
the baskets that have been donated to date include:








7” 16 GB Kindle Fire Tablet from Amazon with HD
Overnight stay at the Des Moines Downtown Marriott with Breakfast
Iowa State University Utility Tote from Thirty One-complete
with autographed football and other tailgate items.
University of Iowa Utility Tote from Thirty One-complete with
autographed football and other tailgate items.
Golf Foursome with Cart-Briarwood Country Club
Pampered Chef Basket
Avon Basket
P. Buckley Moss Heavenly Baby Print with SIDS Awareness Items
If you are interested in donating a gift basket or other prize, please contact Deb
Kozel at [email protected]. You are also welcome to call or text Deb at
515-865-8672. The Ankeny Walk committee thanks you for your continued
support!
SIDS Support Group Information
Des Moines group meets as requested by
appointment. For additional information call the Iowa
SIDS Foundation office at 515-965-7655. Visit
www.iowasids.org or call the office for the next
meeting date.
Cedar Rapids/Iowa City group meets on an as
needed basis. For additional information or to request
a meeting, contact Rachel at 319-721-3273
Washington group will meet as requested. Call
Tony or Tricia at 319-653-7418 for information.
Quad Cities group meets as requested by
Clarion group meets as requested by appointment.
appointment. For information or to schedule a
meeting, call Betsy at 563-332-6265.
Call 1-800-944-1713 and ask for Cheryl.
Cedar Falls/Waterloo New Hope support group Waukon Healing Hearts Infant Loss Support Group
meets at the Waterloo Wheaton Franciscan Covenant
Medical Center, Meeting Room 1. This group meets
the first Thursday of every month. For information,
call 319-272-7370.
Knoxville group meets as requested by appointment.
meets the fourth Sunday of every month beginning at 7
pm. This group meets in the large conference room
on the lower level of Veterans Memorial Hospital in
Waukon. Call Cheryl at 563-568-5486 for more
information.
Call Lori at 641-828-6515 for information.
Did you Know…
The Iowa SIDS Foundation is a 501 (c)(3) non-profit organization. Many employers have programs that will match
employee donations to a non-profit. Check with your employer today, or indicate the Iowa SIDS Foundation as the
recipient of your annual United Way contribution. We appreciate your support!
7
Iowa SIDS Foundation
406 SW School Street, Suite 207
Ankeny, IA 50023
In This Issue...
Executive Director
Patty Keeley
Board Members
Tony Lipski, President
Karen Arnold, Vice President
Gary Marker, Treasurer
Jessie Mireles Secretary
Robert Gonzales, Sr.
Pam Jeneary
Cheryl Livingston
Lu Peverill
Deanna Robey
Chad Sims
Kristin Sjulin
Donn Stanley
Dr. Harry Yuan
*Children & Grief
*Annual SIDS Walk
*Volunteer Spotlight
Iowa SIDS Foundation
406 SW School St., Ste. 207
Ankeny, IA 50023
515-965-7655
866-480-4741 (toll-free)
Email: [email protected]
Web: www.iowasids.org
Our Mission
The Iowa Sudden Infant Death Syndrome Foundation is a
statewide, non-profit, voluntary health organization dedicated to
providing emotional support to SIDS and SUID families, educating
professionals and the general public about SIDS, and funding
medical research into the causes of SIDS.
8
*Remembering Our Babies