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OBAMA BASRA
Mishnah
Mishnah The
president:
CHAPTER ONE
HADONALD
discusses statements made by various politicians running for
‫ — הדונלד שרצה לעשות מחיצה‬The Donald1 who wishes to build a wall2 ‫כופין את‬
‫ — המקסיקאין לבנותו‬can force the Mexicans to build it.3 ‫ — בערני סענדרס אמר‬Bernie
Sanders said, ‫ — זה הכלל‬this is the general rule: ‫ — כל צרכי המדינה‬for all needs of the
country, ‫ — כופין את בני המדינה לשלם‬we force the citizens of the country to pay.4 ‫אמרה‬
‫ — הילארי קלינטאן‬Hillary Clinton said, ‫ — הרי אני כבת שבעים שנה‬behold, I am like a
seventy-year-old,5 ‫ — ולא זכיתי שתשלח אגרת סתר מנגזי אגרות שלי‬yet I was unable to
merit sending confidential emails6 from my private server7 ‫ — עד שדרשה אובמא‬until
Obama expounded the verse, ‫ — שנאמר‬which said,8 ‫ — אגרת הזאת השנית‬this second
letter — ‫ — לרבות אגרת סתר‬to include confidential emails.9
Gemara
The Gemara addresses how
Trump is able to make the
Mexicans pay for the wall:
‫ — והא זה נהנה וזה משלם‬But this one is
benefitting and this one is paying! Since
America is benefitting, they should pay, not
Mexico.10 —?—
‫ — אמר ראב״א‬R’ Ab”a11 answered,
‫ — לכשירגשם‬for when he drives [the
illegally immigrated Mexicans] 12 out.
Since Mexico doesn’t want them either,
they’ll build the wall to keep them out.13
The Gemara still asks:
‫ — מתקיף לה רבב״ב‬R’ Bb”b14 challenged
him, ‫ — והתנן כופין‬but the Mishnah said
that he CAN FORCE them to build the wall.
If the Mexicans are building the wall willingly,
it can’t be described as being forced.15
—?—
The Gemara concedes this point and thus
refutes the question on different grounds:
‫ — אלא לא קשיא‬Rather, it’s not a question
for a different reason: ‫סברא קא רמית עליה‬
— You’re challenging [The Donald] from
logic when you ask that the Americans
should pay? You can’t challenge him from
logic.16 ‫ — דהדאנלד הדאנאלד‬The Donald
is The Donald! ‫ — טפלן הוא‬He’s a talfan17
‫ — ופליג אסברא‬and he can argue on
logic.
The Gemara quotes the next part of the
Mishnah:
‫ — בערני סענדרס אומר‬BERNIE SANDERS
SAID this is the general rule: for all needs of
the country, we force the citizens of the
country to pay.
—NOTES—
10 Rashi.
This refers to Donald Trump. He is referred to as “The”
11 This could be any number of Amoraim — R’ Idi bar Avin, R’
Donald because of his ego, which he makes well-known
through his hair which is so long that it looks like it has
Ada bar Ahavah, etc. — and thus we have left the
extensions (Rashi).
abbreviation as is and not translated it into a name. See note
2 Translation follows Rashi.
14.
3 The Gemara will explain why.
12 Elucidation follows Rashi.
4 The Gemara will explain what this is referring to.
13 Elucidation follows Rashi.
5 But not actually seventy - she’s actually sixty-eight (Rashi).
14 Since the first Amora was abbreviated as ‫ראב״א‬, the
Tosfos add that, unlike R’ Elazar ben Azariah, who made a
Gemara then quoted an Amora whose names begin with the
similar comment when his beard miraculously turned white
next letter after aleph - that is, beis. Thus, ‫רבב״ב‬.
15 Elucidation follows Rashi.
(see Berachos 12a), Hillary’s beard did not turn white, for she
16 Elucidation follows Rashi.
did not have a beard.
6 Translation follows Rashi.
17 Rashi proposes that the word derives from “topple” and
7 Translation follows Rashi. He explains that unlike most
means that he said things so powerfully without logic that it
government employees, who sent their confidential emails on
can overpower well thought-out refutations, or from “teflon”
the government’s server, Hillary deceitfully placed them on
and means that any arguments that are thrown at him won’t
her own.
stick, as if it were thrown at teflon. He adds that the second
8 Esther 9:29
sounds like the more reasonable source. Tosfos propose a
9 Since the first letters didn’t arouse any uproar, since they
third source, ‫ — מטפל‬a therapist; just as a therapist tells you
were sent through the proper government servers, they sent
what to do and doesn’t have to explain, so, too, The Donald.
a second set of letters through private servers. Thus we see
that one is “allowed” to do so (Rashi).
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OBAMA BASRA
CHAPTER ONE
HADONALD
The Gemara asks:
‫ — וכי סענדרס בעי לעשות מחיצה‬But does
Sanders want to make a wall?18 No!
The Gemara explains:
‫ — הכי קאמר‬This is what he means to
say: ‫ — לדידי אין עושין מחיצה‬According
to me, we don’t need to build a wall, and
therefore we don’t need to make the public
pay for it. ‫ — לדידך‬But according to you
that we should build a wall, ‫— אודי לי מיהת‬
at least agree to me ‫דכופין את בני המדינה‬
— that we should force the citizens of the
country of America to pay for it, not those of
Mexico. The Donald would respond, of
course, that he’s going to build a wall and
make Mexico pay for it.
land and islands of the sea. ‫אילו הייתי מלך‬
— If I were king Achashveirosh at that time,
‫ — הייתי נותן בתים מלאים כל טוב‬I would
have given houses full of all good things
‫ — לכל אחד ואחד מבני המדינה‬to each one
of the citizens of the country.21,22 ‫אמר‬
‫ — הדאנאלד‬The Donald said, ‫אילו הייתי‬
‫ — שם‬I f I w e r e t h e r e a n d w e r e
Achashveirosh at that time, ‫לא הייתי נותן‬
‫ — מס אלא על הסינים‬I would have only
placed the tax on the Chinese.23 ‫אמרה‬
‫ — הילארי‬Hillary said, ‫ — אילו הייתי שם‬If
I were there and were Achashveirosh at that
time, ‫— הייתי נוטלת כל המס מרחוב הכותל‬
I would have placed the entire tax on Wall
Street.24
The Gemara proposes a query based on
Sanders’ opinion:
‫ — איבעיא להו‬They asked the following:
‫ — גלידה מאי‬If someone wants to eat ice
cream, what is the halacha? Do we make
the other citizens pay for it, or is that not
considered a benefit of the public that we
would make everyone else pay?19
The Gemara solves the question based on a
Braisa:
‫ — תא שמע‬Come and hear a proof, ‫דתניא‬
— for we taught in a Braisa: ‫דרש בערני‬
‫ — סענדרס‬Bernie Sanders expounded,20
‫וישם אחשורוש מס וגו׳‬
— and
Achashveirosh placed a tax, etc. on the
The Gemara quotes the next part of the
Mishnah:
‫ — ולא זכיתי שתשלח‬Hillary said that she
was like a seventy-year-old, yet I was
unable to send classified emails from my
private server, until Obama expounded a
verse like her.
The Gemara asks:
‫ — ולא‬But was she not able to send them?
‫ — והכתיב‬But the passuk says,25 ‫ויודע‬
‫ — הדבר למרדכי‬and the matter became
known to Mordechai. ‫ — מנא ידע‬From
where did he know? ‫לאו משום שנשלח על‬
‫ — ידי גנזי אגרות דידה‬Is it not because
hackers found the files sent from her
—NOTES—
Usually when the Mishnah says “this is the general rule,” it
marry a woman with money? They answer that, indeed, it
means to elaborate on the previous clause. Since the
would be impossible to get married with money in a country.
23 Since the Chinese are bankrolling the Americans, they use
Mishnah just discussed The Donald’s plan to build a wall, the
Gemara thus assumes that Sanders is saying that when
their position to take advantage of America and steal money.
building such a wall — or any other need of the country — we
Trump thus promises that if he rises to power, he will tax the
should make the country pay. Since he doesn’t want to build
Chinese and weaken them in return (Rashi). Tosfos point out
a wall, why does he preface it with “this is the general rule”?
that even if Trump were in Achashveirosh’s shoes, he
19 Elucidation follows Rashi.
wouldn’t be able to tax the Chinese — he was king only from
20 Esther 10:1
Ethiopia to India, which doesn’t include China! This just goes
21 Thus the Gemara has shown that Bernie would give ice
to show you what Trump is willing to do to “make America
cream to citizens at everyone’s expense, as that would be
great again.”
24 Translation follows Rashi. Tosfos ask: Hillary makes
included in “all good things” (Rashi). Although the Gemara
could conclude here, it quotes the rest of the Braisa anyway.
thousands of dollars from Wall Street; why would she tax
22 Tosfos ask: According to Sanders, he would give such vast
them? It must be, then, that she would continue accepting
amounts of everything — even silver — that it would be
these funds for personal use but call them a tax, just that it
devalued to the point that it would not even be worth a
sounds better to call them a tax instead of a bribe.
25 Esther 2:22. The “matter” discussed here is the plot by
perutah, the smallest unit of currency. This poses the
following problem: one of the ways to marry women is with
Bigsan and Seresh to kill Achashveirosh.
money or something equal to money (Kiddushin 2a). If there
is so much money that it’s not worth anything, how can you
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OBAMA BASRA
CHAPTER ONE
personal server by Bigsan and Seresh, and
this hacker told Mordechai what he had
found?26
(The Gemara refutes the proof:
‫ — לא‬No; ‫ — דילמא אחבולי אחבליה‬maybe
it’s just a conspiracy.27)
The Gemara poses a query regarding
Hillary’s eligibility to be President:
‫ — איבעיא להו‬They asked the following:
‫ — שלח אגרת סתר‬One who sends
HADONALD
classified documents publicly, ‫מי פסלינן‬
‫ למלכות‬2 8 [ ‫ — ) ליה ( ] לה‬i s s h e 2 8
disqualified for the Presidency?29 ‫ואם‬
30[‫ — תמצא לומר פסלינן )ליה( ]לה‬And if
you want to say we do disqualify her,30
‫ — שלח אגרת סתם‬if one sent unclassified
emails ‫ — ואחר כך נעשית אגרת סתר‬that
afterwards were classified,31 ‫מי פסלינן‬
‫ למלכות‬3 0 [ ‫ — ) ליה ( ] לה‬i s s h e 3 0
disqualified from the presidency?32 ‫תיקו‬
— Let it stand unanswered.
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—NOTES—
Elucidation follows Rashi. Tosfos argue, noting that Hillary
to her. Presumably, this was changed due to censorship, as
was merely seventy when she spoke of her private server,
above (see note 26).
29 Elucidation follows Rashi.
whereas the incident of Bigsan and Seresh took place over
30 Presumably, Haghos HaBadchan’s change would apply
two thousand years before she was born. Rather, the
Gemara is speaking deceitfully, due to censors. (See note
here as well, since we are still talking about Hillary.
31 Rashi explains that the document lacked the word
28.) Not wanting to speak out her lies, since that would imply
that there is some truth to what she said, the Gemara uses
“classified” when it was sent, and the word was added.
an exaggeration: just as it’s preposterous to think that Bigsan
Tosfos argue, saying that it goes after the contents, not the
and Seresh were able to send emails from her server, it’s
document itself. Even though it’s uncommon for such a
also preposterous to think that Hillary didn’t send them.
situation to occur anyway for a document to be sent
27 Perhaps Bigsan and Seresh didn’t actually plot to kill the
unclassified and later classified, but since Hillary is claiming
king, but were merely set up and hanged for it. Thus, there’s
that’s what happened with all the thousands of “classified”
no proof that such a server exists, so for all we know it could
emails on her server, the Gemara felt a need to mention the
be a right-wing conspiracy (Rashi). Since we know that
case.
32 Tosfos note that Rashi’s wording seems to indicate that
Bigsan and Seresh actually plotted to kill the king, it follows
based on this Gemara’s analogy that Hillary actually does
you can vote for Hillary. But the Gemara seems to indicate
have such a server. Therefore, it must be that this line was
that one is disqualified from the Presidency by sending
added by Hillary’s advisors, and so it must be deleted
classified emails, since there’s a rule that if the Gemara asks
(Tosfos). For this reason, we have placed this line in
“and if you want to say…” it means we hold of that side! How
parentheses in our elucidation.
can someone who’s disqualified from the Presidency become
28 The original reading is ‫ליה‬, to him. Since we are dealing
President?
with Hillary, Haghos HaBadchan changes the reading to ‫לה‬,
26