POINTERS FOR PARENTING AFTER YOUR DIVORCE
In almost every divorce child custody becomes a major concern. Custody can be in the
form of sole or joint physical custody. The couple should take a mutual decision on this
for the benefit of their children. Parenting becomes even more challenging after the
divorce. To make parenting easy the divorce lawyers in Phoenix AZ share some pointers
which will help you in providing an amicable atmosphere to your kids.
Give them the freedom of being with both of you
No matter how bitter your relation becomes with your partner, you have to make one
thing clear in your mind that for your kids you both are equal. When you ask them to
choose one from you two, you are creating anxiety and guilt in them. You should allow
your kids to meet their grandparents and cousins on a regular basis and let them enjoy
their company.
Avoid Speaking poorly of your ex
It doesn’t matter if your marriage has not gone well as you hoped. When you taking the
step of getting divorced you are filled with mixed emotion of anger, disappointment,
betrayal. These all are genuine to anyone. It is better for you to control these emotions
after your divorce. As a parent you should behave like an adult. Avoid speaking badly
about your ex in front of children only then they will respect their parents.
Don’t make your child your messenger
You can communicate with your former spouse in different ways like sending text,
emailing, or making phone call. But remember don’t make your child as a
communication medium. As your separation has already affected them a lot and by
making your kid a messenger for you, you might just be playing with their emotions
.You responsibility is to protect your child.
Become a bigger person
It are up to you what you what kind of life you want after your divorce. If you are still
complaining about your former spouse then you are just ruining your life and family.
After the divorce become a bigger person and forget everything that was happened in
the past. Set goals in the form of short, medium and long ones for yourself and for your
children. Remember your children need your time, your support. Sometime they need
support from both of you, don’t compete for that time and try to understand that for
children you both are equal so that they can succeed in their life.
Effective communication with children
When your children want to share their experiences with you listen to them carefully
and respond to them accordingly. Let them feel that you are there for them. In many
cases kids might blame themselves for their parents separation in that case you can
communicate to them openly and tell them they were not the reason for divorce.
Not necessary to give every detail
It is not necessary to give every detail about how hard life is, how little money you
have in your account, don’t tell them if your job is not going well. If you are painting a
gloomy picture for your kids then you are confusing them. For your children you are
their support system and if they hear these kinds of words from your mouth they will
feel more stressed and this will affect their development.
Remember you alone have to deal with all kind of troubles or financial crisis that you
are facing. They feel insecure if they came to know that you can’t handle your problem
by yourself. So try to resolve your issues without letting them know. Take help from
friends and other family members. For emotional support have a support system of
people around you who understand your feelings.
Create safety
The key responsibility of a parent is to provide good food, good place to live and to
give a safe environment where the kids can feel comfortable. Be a responsible person
and try to fulfill what you commit. Respect your kid’s emotions. Set some home rules
so that they don’t have to struggle with the day to day activities.
Article Resource - https://attorneys-arizona.jimdo.com/2018/03/03/a-fewpointers-for-parenting-after-your-divorce/