Editing
The Lazy Editor
Get a Whiff of That!
You wouldn’t want to be a judge at the annual Rotten Sneaker Contest
Directions: Read the following article,
which contains many terrible mistakes.
Then follow the prompts in the box on the
next page.
long-suffering judges. He says that the best—or worst,
depending on how you look at it—sneakers have
an odor that is both “pungent” (sharp and
strong) and “putrid” (characteristic of decay or
rotting). “It kind of brings water to
1
Next time you take off your
sneakers, hold them up to your
your eyes,” he says.
So what
nose and take a deep whiff. Did you
3
gag on the foul stench? If so, you
smell? Closed-toe
might want to enter your shoes in the
annual Odor-Eaters National Rotten
Sneaker Contest. (Yes, this is a real
contest.) Every year, kids and teens
compete to see whose shoes have the
makes shoes
shoes such as
sneakers provide
the perfect
environment
for bad smells.
most repulsive disgusting
The foot has
stomach-churning smell.
more than
2
Entries are judged on:
(1) odor, (2) physical
condition, and (3) the story of
how the shoes became so,
um, fragrant. The
winning shoes must
go way beyond
gross. Just ask
George Aldrich,
a chemical
specialist at
NASA who
served as one of
the brave
Scholastic Scope • JANUARY 2015
250,000
Thinkstock/iStockphoto/Getty Images (sneakers);
Atid Kiattisaksiri/E+/Getty Images (smoke)
By Jennifer Shotz
Shutterstock (guy holding nose); Courtesy of Kaye evens-lutterodt/PR
Neswire (Jordan Armstrong). ILLUSTRATION BY dave CLEGG
We love this story. Too bad we couldn’t be
bothered to edit it! Will you fix it for us?
sweat glands; when the moisture they produce—along
Cruces, New
with dirt and dead skin cells—gets trapped inside a
Mexico. Rachel
shoe, bacteria begin to grow. As the bacteria feast on
Herz, a Brown
the delicious brew in your shoe, they produce a
University
gas that has a bad smell. People often
professor who studies the psychology of
describe foot smells as smelling like
smell and she served as one of the
cheese, vinegar, or rotten eggs.
4
judges, said that Jordan’s shoes had “a
As gross as they are, unpleasant
really smelly, sweaty-feet funk and a
smells are important. Our ability
mildewy, watery, swampy, nasty smell
to detect bad smells prevents us from
mixed in there.” Jordan’s foul footwear
eating rotten food, tells us if a room is
scored her $2,500, two nights in New York
filled with toxic gas, and alerts us to
smoke or fire. Our sense of smell also
helps us with hygiene: If we smell, we
Jordan Armstrong, proud
owner of the nation’s
stinkiest sneakers
know it’s time to wash up.
5
City, she got tickets to a Broadway show,
the Golden Sneaker Award, and a supply
of Odor-Eaters products. Her winning
shoes will also have a special spot in the Odor-Eaters
Of course, if you are trying to
take first prize in the Rotten
Sneaker Contest, a bad smell
“Hall of Fumes.”
6
How did Jordan’s sneakers reach this pinnacle of
putridness? “I’ve had them for four years now,”
wafting up from your feet is
Jordan said, clutching her trophy in triumph. “And I’ve
nothing but good news. Last
really worn them almost every day. I even slept in them
year’s contest winner was
12-year-old Jordan
Armstrong of Las
Find It/Fix It
some nights to make them even stinkier.” It seems that
even for a champ like Jordan, training was rigorous,
and to win was no easy feet. Er, feat.
•
Directions: Can you find the following errors in the
article and fix them? Write the answers on your own paper.
Paragraphs 1 & 2: When you use more than one adjective to describe a noun, those adjectives
usually need to be separated by commas. Plug your nose and add the three missing commas.
Paragraphs 3 & 4: Did the writer run out of words? She uses smell too much in these
paragraphs. Boring! Freshen up these paragraphs by replacing some of the smells with other,
more vivid words.
Get
Paragraphs 5 & 6: Your job is to read these paragraphs,
for more practice,
MORE
Go to SCOPE online. Online!
find three parallel-structure mistakes, and to fix them.
scope.scholastic.com • JANUARY 2015