I Resolve To… During this month of resolutions, I thought I’d step away from the usual resolutions - getting in shape, losing weight, and quitting smoking - to resolutions that pertain to how we want to be, or need to improve, as parents. As I have written many times over the years in this column, parenting is the hardest job, by far, that I have ever had to do. Because there wasn’t a specific manual for parenting, I, like many others, just “winged it,” which means I ended up beating myself up over many mistakes. My advice to new parents: Children do not need you to be perfect; they just need someone to guide and support them. Resolutions on parenting could go something like this: I resolve to… Criticize less I will admit that this was (and, yes, sometimes I slip into old behaviors) me as a parent. My intentions were good; I thought it was just construc- +IH;>HI=E $;GCFS with Lori Catozzi Cook tive criticism. I wanted my children to have good habits, to avoid mistakes, and to develop into fine young men. But I was insensitive; what I was doing was making them feel less confident. So, whether the criticism is constructive or destructive, this year strive to not criticize. Give responsibilities and freedoms as earned Your little man or little girl is growing up. Even though you’d like to see them stay young forever, they can’t. They are growing physically and mentally every day. And, along with this growth comes privileges and responsibilities appropriate for their age and maturity levels. Help them grow. Not fight in front of the children It’s understandable that couples will not be in agreement over everything. Healthy disagreements – when you are talking it out and listening to each other – are actually good for children to observe; it teaches them how conflict is resolved. But, if you are yelling, screaming, and name calling, that negative communication could very well not only influence how your children will handle situations, but be stressful to them. Stop the threats If you find your day is filled with endless threats to your children for not picking up after themselves, chores that aren’t being completed, or perhaps not taking care of the dog like was agreed upon prior to getting a pet, then you are probably beyond frustrated. Stop the threats. Instead, it’s time for some carry-through on your part. I understand that it will be very hard for you to watch your child go through the consequences, and you might feel as if you are “hated” for a while; but what you need to keep in mind is that your child will be learning a valuable lesson because of the consequences. Be more affectionate Hug and kiss your children more. You might get the rolling of the eyes from your teenager when you go to hug him, but that’s just a teenager thing. In their own way, they still like the hugs and kisses. My sons are in their twenties and I still expect a hug before they leave when they visit me; I don’t even have to say anything anymore. (I expect that they probably want, and need, the hug as well.) Model kindness and compassion We all want to raise our children to be kind and compassionate adults. How often do you show kindness and compassionate to others? Kids notice if you are rude to a waitress or cashier. They notice if you help an elderly person and whether you help or ignore those less fortunate. Practice then you can preach. Remember when Sometimes our children’s behavior can be a bit baffling to us. So it’s important to have a basic understanding of what they deal with on a daily basis. Remember your own childhood – elementary school years, high school years, early adult life – and any issues you had to deal with. Now you can probably double those problems to understand just what our children deal with nowadays. Share my interests Do you love to paint, play basketball, or cook? Share your interests with your children. Not only might exposing them to something new spark something they might not of known that they were good at, but gives your children important time with you. Lori Catozzi Cook is the assistant editor and a feature writer for The Monadnock Shopper News. Say You Saw it in The Monadnock Shopper News, January 28 – February 3, 2015 &..7 '02&"7 from HANNAFORD’S SUPERMARKETS JANUARY 29, 2015 Jacob Tarr, son of Matthew Tarr, Swanzey, and Jessica Miner, Spofford, 2. JANUARY 31, 2015 Alexandra Frazier, daughter of Chad and Angie Frazier, Marlborough, 11. FEBRUARY 2, 2015 Finley Avery, daughter of Ryan and Becky Avery, Swanzey, 10. FEBRUARY 3, 2015 Katelyn Brooks, daughter of Michael and Jennifer Brooks, Sullivan, 6. HANNAFORD’S BIRTHDAY CAKE winners last week were: This Week’s Birthday Cake Winners are: * Jacob Tarr, Spofford, 2. * Alexandra Frazier, Marlborough, 11. Plan your next birthday at #B?MBCL?#BCF>L?H M-OM?OG We do all the work! ÞÊÊUÊiiiÊUÊ903-1800 www.cheshirechildrensmuseum.org THE BIRTHDAY BOX They Pick the Toys They 7ANT Picture Unavailable YOU SAVE Kaylee Cotnoir, Swanzey, 9 Matthew Davis, Swanzey, 12 To enter, clip the coupon below or e-mail child’s name, gender, age, birth date, town, and parents’ names to [email protected]. Please make sure to include all information. 10%! See store for details. TOY CITY +EY2OADs+EENE 603-352-3131 Like Us On Tracy Walden, AAI Senior Business Insurance Advisor Our service saves you time and our choices save you money. Our experienced team, with an average of over 25 years of experience, quotes your insurance with the top rated insurance companies in the industry – Giving our insurance customers an important advantage. 69A Island Street Suite 1 Keene, NH 03431 • 603-352-1810 • Open M–F at 8:00 AM HOME • AUTO • BUSINESS • LIFE • BENEFITS YOUR FULL-SERVICE GLASS COMPANY Visit www.masielloinsurance.com for online quoting Our experienced glaziers provide prompt, friendly service for all your glass needs. For a free, no-obligation consultation, please call us at 603-357-8889 or visit our web site today. Come Join Our Most Sought-After Section… Locally Owned & Operated Offering expert installation of quality EnergyEfficient Replacement Windows & Doors, Shower & Tub Enclosures, Custom Mirrors, Screen Repair/Replacement and More. Replacement Windows from 107362 INDUSTRIES 7 Krif Court Keene, NH 03431 Mon-Fri 8am-5pm, Mon-Fri 8 am-5Satpm8am-noon www.cheshire-glass.com Shower/Tub Enclosures Many styles to choose from HANNAFORD’S SUPERMARKETS West Street, Keene, NH BIRTHDAY CAKE DRAWING Mail coupon to: The Monadnock Shopper News, P.O. Box 487, Keene, NH 03431-0487 • All children through age 12 are eligible. • Entries must be mailed; no phone calls, please. • Forms must be received two weeks before child’s birthday. PRINT OR TYPE CLEARLY. CHILD’S NAME_________________________________________________________ AGE* ____________________________SEX ________PHONE _______________ BIRTHDATE ____________________________________________________________ PARENTS’ NAME (S) ____________________________________________________ ADDRESS ______________________________________________________________ *Age child will be on this birthday. 15 ESTABLISHED 2015 We’ll publish our 54th Annual “Yesterday & Today” Edition (filled with local historical photos & anecdotes) on February 4, 2015. Last Year, 414 Businesses, Schools & Institutes Participated! ONLY 79 $ Don’t Be Left Out! ONLINE FOR ONE FULL YEAR ON OUR WEBSITE! with hyperlink to your website. The deadline for advertising & editorial copy is Thursday, Jan. 29, 2015 at 5 pm Call us at (603) 352-5250 or stop by 445 West Street, Keene Monday-Friday 8:00 am - 5:00 pm
© Copyright 2024