Issue 300 October 2011 International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day October 15th ds the community in pregn Sands lea ancy a n d i nf ant loss awareness and support. S ands News Newsletter sponsorship available Please contact the office for details THE STORY OF SANDS Sands came into being in 1983 when a small group of parents gathered in each others lounge rooms to support one another after they had experienced the death of their babies. From those humble beginnings Sands has expanded to a staffed office with a number of different support services. Listener Service Trained volunteer bereaved parents are on call 24/7 to provide a listening ear. The Sands 1800 number is available for parents who live outside the Brisbane metropolitan area. The numbers for listeners can be accessed by calling the Sands office. A comprehensive range of booklets and pamphlets are available relating to all facets of grief and loss relating to the death of a baby. They are relevant to parents, families, friends and health care professionals. Web site The Sands web site is an electronic means of providing and obtaining support. The information is available 24/7 and bereaved parents can contact the Sands office from the web site. Regional Contacts Contacts for different areas of Queensland and Northern New South Wales are in the back of the newsletter. The contacts may be bereaved parents or caring health care professionals. Email Support Some parents may find ringing a support person or attending a support meeting very confronting and the anonymity of email can be a useful to obtain support and information. Support Meetings Parents often find comfort and a feeling of normality when talking with other bereaved parents. The shared experience can help to alleviate the sense of isolation that is sometimes felt by parents. Sands Logo The Jigsaw Baby is the Sands Logo. It represents the struggle parents and families have fitting the pieces of their lives together again – one piece is always missing. Library The Sands library contains a range of books that cover topics relevant to bereaved parents. A library catalogue can be obtained by contacting the Sands office. The books are available by dropping into the office or they can be mailed out. We ask that if you are able, to provide stamps when you return the books if they have been mailed to you. You are required to become a member to access the library facilities. Sands Membership All parents who contact Sands will receive three complimentary issues of the newsletter after which a letter will be sent offering membership. Yearly membership is $30 but in case of financial difficulty, a smaller membership fee will be acceptable. When membership falls due, a reminder will be sent. A membership form is included in the newsletter. There are two classifications of membership: Ordinary: includes bereaved parents and families Associate: non-bereaved people including professional and community individuals who have an interest in Sands. Newsletter The newsletter is an important communication tool for parents, families and health care professionals. It is a forum for support, is printed monthly and members contributions are very welcome. 2 Booklets and Pamphlets S ands News Contents Sands Calendar: page 4 Coordinator’s Report: page 5 SANDS News: SANDS Library: page 11 Parent Stories: page 23 page 20 Memorials: page 31 Harrison McKenzie Thomas James Saccasan Sebastian Nolan-Smith Charlotte Milligan Izaak & Jay Isabella Smith Donations: page 39 Memorial Services: page 41 Contact SANDS (QLD) INC. OFFICE SANDS House, 505 Bowen Terrace, New Farm, Brisbane POSTAL ADDRESS PO Box 934, New Farm QLD 4005 TELEPHONE (07) 3254 3422 (Brisbane Callers) 1800 228 655 (Regional Callers support only) FAX (07) 3358 2533 EMAIL Nicky: Kath: [email protected] (general office) [email protected] (support and management) Jayde/Miriam: [email protected] (newsletter submissions) WEBSITE: www.sandsqld.com MANAGEMENT COMMITTEE Contactable through the office on 3254 3422 President Bev Homel Vice PresidentVacant Secretary Nicky Lynch Treasurer Jenny Barends GeneralBob Deuble Fran Boyle Rachel Schilling Janelle Tsockallos Nerissa Healey COORDINATOR Kath Harvey OFFICE MANAGER Nicky Lynch 3 Suppor t Meetings 4 S ands News Coordinator’s Report Dear Friends of SANDS Recently Bev suggested to me that our next newsletter report should focus on what we have achieved over the past year. The year in review! Since Nicky and I started in our positions at SANDS in October and November last year it’s been a very busy period. At times we have had 75 new parents in a month coming to SANDS for support. Some are referred by hospitals, they may have received our leaflet, or some may be referred by friends and family and through the internet. However a large number of referrals are those we hear about from SANDS parents. Recently I had a SANDS parent phone me about one of her friends who had lost a baby. She wanted to get some advice and resources to take to her. Our parent was able to talk with her friend about memory creation and we helped organise referrals from several memory creation companies to go into the hospital. That was a very satisfying day – we had made a difference. The first month I started with SANDS just before 2010 Walk to Remember and just in time to attend The International Stillbirth Alliance (ISA) and International Society for the Study and Prevention of Infant Death (ISPID) conference in Sydney. The conference was a wonderful opportunity to network with organisations involved in research and care of bereaved parents. Liz spent most of the time introducing me to all the key people. During the conference we discussed the upcoming Lancet special edition on Stillbirth – and that’s where my idea for special edition newsletters came from. After the conference Nicky and I spent a great deal of time re-organising the office and re-developing partnerships and networks as Liz had been gone for a number of months. Almost immediately we noticed that hospitals felt confident about sending parents to us once again. Within a few days of me starting at SANDS the Mater Mothers Hospital offered us free trade display at their bereavement conference. This was an excellent opportunity to get amongst a few hundred midwives and promote our model of care. We had over 50 requests for professional packs after this conference. Our refurbished meeting rooms Following January’s Brisbane flood we had a good clean and tidy up. Our ground floor rooms in New Farm received water damage, not flood water, as the storm water drains were backed up. We believe that water coming through the drainage system flooded into our meeting support rooms as the ground was so wet. It actually 5 S ands News flooded a couple of times with Nicky and her family spending a whole day mopping the room on the first occasion and the team from AA (who use our meeting rooms) coming and pumping out the water before all power to the Brisbane CBD and New Farm area was turned off. Unfortunately the room wasn’t drained of the water for nearly a week – and with the heat and humidity - it wasn’t in good shape. On my return to work I heard a radio report on ABC about how to clean and kill mould spores and how you should tackle to clean the room. It became apparent that I would need Oil of Cloves. Nicky and I rang many pharmacy groups trying to find this new liquid gold. I finally went on radio to ask for help and we received many offers. Once the room was treated we then had our working bee. We called for help from SANDS parents and I sent out messages to my friends to come and help. It was hot, sticky, smelly work, but by the end of the day our support room was at least clean and smelt fresh. The furniture had to be disposed off and we were thankful for the donation of a couple of sofas from parents. We also received a significant donation from All Door Solutions which we were very grateful for. This money was used to buy new furniture for the meeting room. Since then the meeting room has had a makeover. Priority, a company that does office makeovers, offered to re-tile, repaint and install new air conditioners. Many thanks to Kylie Jones, a SANDS parent, who worked with her brother in law to make all of this happen. Clinical Guidelines on Stillbirth and Early Pregnancy Loss In the New Year we were asked by Queensland Health to be the lead parent organisation in the development of Clinical Guidelines on Stillbirth and Early Pregnancy Loss. The Queensland Centre for Mothers and Babies were contracted by Queensland Health to develop a number of parent fact sheets - one on stillbirth and the other on autopsy. They approached us to assist with this. The consultation process was significant. The fact sheets are now ready to distribute to hospitals and they will also be used by us. They cover a lot more information than just grief and loss issues. Many of you may be surprised with the amount of information in the autopsy fact sheet. 13 000 support line SANDS Australia, our national body, has received a grant from the Federal Government to develop and implement a national wide support line. The 13 000 support line is now active and state organisations are implementing procedures of how it will work in their state. Nerissa Healey (from the Far North) and I are members on the National Council. Over the past year we have developed - National training frameworks; - reporting templates; - and we are working towards the development of national resources. In Queensland it is our intention to have parent supporters on a regional roster, with 6 S ands News supporters in Cairns only receiving calls from their area. This will make the service community based and would enable parents to be able to network directly with other bereaved parents in their region. In May we had our parent supporters training. This brought together 35 parents from around the State. The weekend was a huge success. This year we had a mix of training from professionals such as Grief and Loss Counsellor Susan De Campo; Author Doris Zagdanski and presentations from key health professional including Dr Ingrid Rowlands, Research Fellow, UQ, Dr Carol Portmann, Maternal Fetal Medicine, RBWH, Vicki Flenady, Dr Lucy Cooke, Neonatalogist, Mater Hospital. The weekend was also a wonderful opportunity for current parent supporters and potential parent supporters to network, to share ideas and information about what is happening in their regional areas. Doris Zagdanski has always been very supportive of SANDS and has offered to do more training over the next year. We have recently been invited by SANDS Victoria to attend their specific facilitation meeting training and four of our parent supporters will attend this training next weekend. SANDS Queensland also received a small seeding grant from SANDS Australia to assist in getting the 13 000 service active in Queensland. Our committee has decided to fund a part time, short contract position for a Parent Support Coordinator. This position will be responsible for establishing a roster, coordinating with other parent supporters and getting the system up and running; as well as assisting with the updating of our resources and potential education and training. An appointment should be confirmed within the next month. Of course we continue to do a lot of parent support in the office. Nicky does a lot of work posting out resource orders to hospitals, as well as the day to day administration of the office, paying the bills and generally keeping the place ticking over. I am on several hospital consumer groups. Being at these meetings has opened many opportunities for SANDS. The Royal Brisbane Womens Hospital recently sought advice from us on the development of their bereavement room; the new Gold Coast Hospital have approached us to assist with their training of midwives and are keen for us to be the lead parent organisation. We continue to have an ongoing relationship with the Australian College of Midwives. We have made presentations as part of their midwife education program, many thanks to Sarah Connolly and Mel McKenzie for assisting with this. We have had student midwives attend our support meetings. Often midwives say to me, that while bereavement, loss and grief are covered in their training, its not until they are face to face with a parent that they wished they had more training. We have recently been offered free trade display at the Australian College of Midwives conference. Of course there are a number of things that the Committee will need to face in the coming months. Mostly around finance. The small funding grant that we receive from Queensland Health pays for two part time workers and general office expenses. As our membership grows so does the pressure on resources and particularly postage. 7 S ands News But without the team of volunteers SANDS would exist differently. We have a wonderful team (Miriam and Jayde) who produce our newsletter. The newsletter is a major piece of work every month. I thank them for their work, often done in weekends and late at night. On the last Thursday of each month, a team of parents come into the office to post out the newsletter – it’s a very social group. Thank you. We also have other volunteers (parents, grandparents and friends) of SANDS who come into office and help print resources, organise orders – Thank you to Robbie, Miriam, Narelle and Trish in particular; Wednesdays and Fridays are not the same without you. My final thank you is to the team of Parent supporters in the community. The work you do makes a significant contribution to the work of SANDS, I honour the work you do. Kath HELP SANDS TO SAVE MONEY SANDS QLD is struggling to keep up with the cost of postage. Perhaps you could help us by requesting that your newsletter is received via email rather than post. Also you might like to consider sponsoring the newsletter for a particular month which might be special to you. If you would like to sponsor the newsletter please contact us at [email protected], the cost is $250. This money goes towards the cost of producing the newsletter. 8 S ands News Year In Review Cairns Group It has been a very successful year for our group here in Cairns. Last year’s Walk to Remember was a big turning point for our group. Support group numbers after the walk doubled and occasionally tripled. After seeing the success of the Walk both in providing something special for families and in creating awareness we decided that it was worthy of trying to get some more support and funding for next year’s event. Fortunately we were successful in obtaining a community development grant from Cairns Regional Council. We are also lucky that we have a small group of parents that are committed to making the walk a success. We are really excited about this year’s Walk and feel that having this extra money is allowing us to do something extra special for families in the area. Since last year’s walk we have also done three presentations at Cairns Base hospital and have made regular contact with the private hospital. Having regular contact with the hospitals has allowed us to build strong relationships. The benefits of these relationships have showed by the amount of people who receive SANDS information directly from the hospitals. In June this year we changed the day and venue of our support group. Previously the group was held on the far northern side of Cairns and on a weekday. Our new venue is in a more central part of Cairns and is held on a Sunday to allow for people to attend who may work through the week. Changing the day has especially proven successful with our dads, it is now not uncommon to see two or even three dads attend the group. Having so many extra dads involved in the group saw the introduction of our golf mornings just for the boys. Reports back showed the morning was very successful so we are hoping to keep the mornings as a quarterly event. The boys are also looking at having a fishing trip together later in the year. In early August we also held a BBQ down on the Cairns Esplanade for all of our SANDS families in the area. We had quite a good turnout and saw a few faces that no longer come to groups but still wanted to catch up on a more casual level. We hope that we can continue in providing a strong support base that people can rely on in the Cairns area. 9 Suppor t Meetings SANDS Brisbane Subsequent Pregnancy Support Meeting “Managing Your Anxiety” Date: Time: Venue: RSVP: Tuesday 18th October 2011 7.00pm SANDS House 505 Bowen Terrace, New Farm Not essential We are pleased to be able to offer this meeting to members after requests for support at this time. 10 S ands News 11 S ands News Brisbane Walk to Remember Sunday 16th October 2011 Planning is underway and registrations are coming in… here are a few things to remember… • • • • Registration is from 8am; Memorial Service begins at 9am. BYO picnic or something to share (no BBQ this year) There will be cupcakes for sale (thanks Kylie!) It’s likely to be hot – so slip, slop, slap! We still need your help. Please contact the office if you can… 1. put us in touch with a club or church that can loan us tables and chairs for the Walk to Remember. We need them from 7.30am till midday on Sunday 16th October 2. bring along a good portable sound system 3. pick up a shade cover or gazebo a couple of days before the event and deliver it to New Farm Park at 7.30am on the day. They would also need to be returned afterwards. 4. help to sell raffle tickets on the day, or help with registration or balloons 5. help us pack up and clean up afterwards! Thank you for your assistance – we couldn’t do it without you! Please call the office (3254 3422) or email us at admin@sandsqld. com to volunteer your help… Many thanks, Linda 12 S ands News Wave Of Light The Mater Mothers’ Hospitals are holding our fourth annual non-denominational service of remembrance to recognise International Pregnancy & Infant Loss Day on Saturday 15th October 2011 at 7pm. The international theme of the service is a ‘wave of light.’ Each year all around the world on this date and time, candles are lit to honour and remember a baby that has died. The result is a wave of light around the world. The Bereavement Support Program at The Mater Mothers’ Hospital would like to invite parents and families who have experienced the loss of a pregnancy or baby to share this special evening. The service will be held in the Eire Room on level three of The Corporate Services Building (formally the Original Mater Mothers’ Hospital). There will be refreshments and a chance to talk with others after the service. Please contact Marisa Murphy on 3163 5146 or [email protected] if you would like further information. If you are unable to attend the remembrance service but would like a candle to be lit in memory of your baby, please contact Marisa with your details and we will ensure this wish is acknowledged and carried out. 13 S ands News To support SANDS Qld, donations can be made at www.everydayhero.com.au/sands_townsville 14 S ands News 15 S ands News BRIDGE TO BRISBANE Thank you to members Kylie White and Claire Lynch who raised much needed funds for SANDS during the recent Bridge to Brisbane Fun Run. WELL DONE! 16 S ands News 17 S ands News Talent International Recently, Ardoch who share our building, had volunteers from Talent International (a recruitment agency) come and spend a day at the SANDS House. Ardoch Youth Foundation is a not for profit organisation that works nationally to make education a reality for children and young people. The team from Talent International spent time gardening, installing garden edge borders, and other maintenance work. We thank them for their donation of time and money. 18 S ands News Women on Walks Hi, my name is Linda Male and I would love you to join me on a walk sometime. I experienced the loss of a much wanted pregnancy 11 years ago, and joined SANDS after a good friend told me about the organisation. I now have a degree in Psychology and a passion for helping families. I worked as a volunteer Counsellor for over 20 years but my most recent job was working with bereaved families at SIDS and Kids Queensland. I believe that walking groups (which offer mutual support, gentle exercise and nature’s beauty) can assist bereaved women and so I have started Women on Walks as a non-profit business. We offer three types of groups... Bereavement Walks are for anyone who is grieving the loss of a child, a partner, a sibling, a parent or a friend. There is no charge for this service. We supply tissues and will not be upset if YOU are upset. Our walks are held at Sandgate on the first Sunday of each month. We meet at the corner of Flinders Parade and Cliff Streets, opposite the Baptist Church, at 4pm and usually walk to the Shorncliffe jetty and back, which is a gentle one hour stroll. I carry a red balloon so that you can find us easily... Please bring water and a small plate of food or fruit to share after the walk. It can be breezy by the sea, so a jacket is always a good idea! Upcoming dates in 2011 are October 2nd, November 6th and December 4th. Bereavement Retreats are held every few months, over a weekend. They are offered at cost price. Groups are small and we offer enjoyable and meaningful activities, plus a chance to have some time-out. Our next weekend will be held in November at Coochie Mudlo Island (just off Victoria Point) and will include a mosaic workshop. Bereavement Treks are held twice a year and are typically a week long. They are also offered at cost price. Our next trek takes place in New Zealand in March 2012, where we will walk the Banks Peninsular Track. The trek is facilitated by two of our trained Counsellors and there are places for ten women to attend. This trek is very beautiful and is good for body, mind and spirit! If you would like to know more, please go to my website… www.womenonwalks.com Thank you, Linda 19 S ands Librar y BOOK REVIEW For the Love of Kids Rosemary Iloste Rosemary Iloste tells of her experiences both as a mother and a foster mother. Part of Rosemary’s story tells of her heartbreaking introduction to motherhood during the 1970’s. Sadly at seven and a half months pregnant Rosemary received the news that her baby Jason had died some months earlier. To add to this Rosemary’s second baby Andrew was stillborn with no known cause. Rosemary talks about the lack of support, lack of recognition for her babies and how losing her babies profoundly affected her selfesteem and confidence. The larger part of Rosemary’s book touches on the ups and downs of being a mother to her living children, as well as the nineteen foster children that she welcomed into her home. Nerissa. Please return any library books that you may have. 20 Talk ing Point Responding to insensitive remarks... When you are tired of remaining silent and want to educate well intending consolers you may consider some of the following pieces of information. Plat-i-tude: a useless remark; something spoken without thought. If you are a grieving parent you can probably rattle off a list of a dozen "platitudes" or clichés you have been bombarded with since the death of your child. Here’s how you might respond. P = platitude (unintelligent) R = response (intelligent) P "It was God's will” R "How do you know? Are you God”? R "Oh! So God did this to me”? R "I prefer to let God whisper his will to me, not you". P "Your child is with Jesus, in a better place” R "As a mother, there is no better place than in my arms”. R "I still ache to have my child here with me”. R "I am sure he/she is, but it doesn't take away the longing as a parent”. R "That really hurts and I would appreciate it if you would let me come to my own conclusions about my child's afterlife when I am ready to do so”. P "Better now than one month/six months/one year from now” R "So then that means you love your older child more than your younger child (to those with more than one child)”? R "There is never a "better time" to bury your child”. R "If God came down and told me, Joanne, I am taking your baby. Do you want me to take her life today or one year from now, what do YOU think my response would be”??? P "It's probably better. There might have been something wrong with her/him” R "If she/he was less than perfect, I would have loved her/him even more”. P "It will make you a stronger person” R "I would rather be weak and shallow and still have my child, thank you”. P "Everything happens for a reason” R "Can you list one reason why a baby should die”? R "Tell it to my broken heart”. R "The death of a child before his/her parent is never reasonable”. P "At least you have other healthy children" R "Children are not interchangeable. I have always been grateful for the children I have. That does not mean I should not grieve for what I have lost”. R "My other healthy children have nothing to do with my grief". R "So if I cut off your thumb you won't miss it because you have four other healthy fingers”?? 21 Talk ing Point P "You're young. You can have another baby" R "I don't want any baby. I want _______"! R "You don't really think that another baby could take the place of ________, do you”? R "THIS child is special to me. I would never try to replace him/her with another". P "Aren't you over it yet"? "When are you going to be over it"? "How long are you going to keep talking about this"? R "You get over being laid off from a job or breaking a leg. You don't ever "get over" the death of your child". R "Funny how the whole country is given permission to mourn the death of Elvis Presley twenty years after his death yet everyone seems intent on forcing me to abandon my child's memory in a few short months". P "I understand how you feel, my dog died last week" (Someone actually said this to me!) R Just walk away from this one. P "He/She wouldn't want you to be sad" R "And I wouldn't want him/her to be dead so I guess we're both fresh outta luck". P "God has a plan for you" R "That is easy to say when his plan doesn't include your child". P "You have to be strong" R "Says who"? R "I am being strong. Just being here means I am being strong". P "At least you didn't have to bring him/her home" R "I would have given anything to have had more time". R "You are joking, aren't you”???? R "Are you suggesting I loved my baby less because he/she didn't sleep in his/her room”? Printed with permission of Miss Foundation organisation http://missfoundation.org/ cherish/remarks.html 22 Member Stor y Parent Stories 23 Memb er Stor y Tristan and Cristy We started our conception journey just after our wedding in October of 2010, given my age and length of time on the pill we expected to wait a while although we didn’t really want to! Doctor’s advice was sought, Tristan stopped smoking and I stopped drinking alcohol and any caffeine at all (the coffee was harder to give up than the wine!) On Valentine’s Day 2011 we did a home pregnancy test and saw two lines, we both cried with excitement and joy, we hadn’t even dreamed of conceiving that quickly. We celebrated our news with our three children aged 11, 9, and 4 and everyone was looking forward to our family growing. Doctor confirmed due date of around October 25th and all went swimmingly through the first 2 months. 8 week photos were taken of my small rounded belly and I was really feeling pregnant, very tired and very emotional, but so, so happy. During weeks 8-10 I had lots of funny intuitive thoughts and dreams, one was that we should have two babies, very close together in age; I just couldn’t shake the two babies’ thing. The other was that if we could pick a due date, what would it be? I meditated on it and came up with October 15th it seemed perfect to me. We had no idea of its relevance at that point. The weekend of my birthday was our 10 week mark and I had some light brown spotting, it wasn’t even really spotting more like smearing and I rang 13Health. I was told to see a doctor that week and not to panic. Saw Doctor on Tuesday and she said the same thing then ordered an ultrasound to calm our nerves. That was Monday March 28th, ultrasound booked for Tuesday and we went home a little calmer. The smearing hadn’t gotten any worse and I was feeling fine. No bleeding no cramping; nothing. Ultrasound time, water consumed, busting out of my pants (it’s an awful feeling), entered the darkened room, and lay down. I guess I had this sense of foreboding doom. I’d rung a girlfriend earlier in the day and said that I was sure everything was okay but couldn’t escape the feeling that there was something wrong. First thing I saw was two babies, two babies!!!! Both of us went into a cold sweat joyous shock. Very quickly, immediately, I recognised no movement at all, the ultrasound tech confirmed my visions and then respectfully turned off the monitors; Tristan made this sound...something I’ll never forget. I don’t really remember much of the visit after that. I remember going to the toilet seeing my reflection and hearing something inside me say “I told you so”. We left in silence, told to see our doctor and sent home. Tristan went back to work and I went to my sister in laws place neither of us knew quite the right thing to say to each other and it just seemed that if we stopped completely the world might end. By Tuesday night I had this awful feeling that I was carrying around two ‘dead babies’ inside me and the realisation carried an enormous weight that I cannot really explain with words, one I hope I never have to feel again. We researched missed miscarriages and called the doctor. 24 Member Stor y Dr was very supportive and very sad, surprised as well about the twins. We still hadn’t really come to terms with that little bit of good news. She suggested we go to the hospital, which we did with scans in hand and I prepared for an ultrasound by not going to the toilet for some time. The hospital visit was truly the worst experience I’ve ever had medically. We were seen about 4 hours after arriving which I understand. The Triage Nurse who saw us upon arrival was very supportive and agreed with our decision to conduct a D&C, she gave us no indications that there’d be any other responses. The doctor selected to care for us introduced herself as a Junior Doctor and it never really got any better than that. I was subjected to an internal, asked at least 6 times if I’d had any bleeding or cramping, and again and again had to explain that I had not. After hours of this torture we were sent home with notes on miscarriage and I was told that I was having a ‘normal miscarriage’ that the hospital would only intervene if I was filling a super sanitary pad every hour with blood. I was told to allow the process to finish, even though it hadn’t really started, and told that I could expect to carry them for another 3-4 weeks as my hormones returned to normal. This thought appalled us both, my dear husband was close to breaking point and we appealed repeatedly for some compassion. It never came. Dejected we left the hospital, miserable and confused. It was my father who suggested our ultimate saving grace, of a clinic. I called one at 9pm that night and was booked in the following morning. The feeling as we approached was weird to say the least, knowing why everyone else was there; terminating healthy babies was the hardest part. The clinic staff was amazing, amid all our fear and confusion they were gentle and most importantly respectful of us and our babies. Following the D&C I felt this strange sense of completion that the twins were now in the right place alongside our beloved dog and my dear grandmother, watching over us all. I was sore and a bit dazed but instantly better on all other levels. Tristan also felt like the right thing had been done, justice served and respect given to our darling angel babies. Since then we have healed each other and the children have each found a way to honour the twins, we have a lovely statue in our bedroom and I purchased a necklace of twin angel babies which I have decided I will wear every October 15th. I’m still coming to terms with our loss, and find it a bit hard to imagine it happening any differently. That was their journey and our lesson and it’s taught us all to value life a little bit more. We are now 2 months into a renewed cycle and trying again; with a happy hope in our heart and so much wiser. 25 Memb er Stor y I Am Your Midwife “Hello, my name is Liana. It’s nice to meet you. Can you tell me what brings you in to see us today?” Then the words I cannot get used to hearing…combined with the look in your eye. “I haven’t been feeling my baby move”… It’s that part of a job I could never comprehend as a student. That in some way, or some how, I am the one who will informally tell you that your baby has died. Thats usually the role of the doctor who sees you after me, but you already know it by the time I’ve attempted for some time to find your precious baby’s heartbeat…the silence in the room screaming around me as I try for another minute to be reassured that your baby is ok. But you know that something is wrong, and you can tell from my tone, my eyes, my words- that I know too. My journey to becoming a midwife started way back when I was apparently about 4 years of age. My mum tells a story of me asking her “what are the people who help you have a baby are called”. Since then, i have used the word “midwife” in sentences before I truly knew what it meant. I dressed up my cats, rocked them to sleep, played with my dolls for hours and looked into every pram just to get a glimpse of every baby I passed. Never could I have comprehended where my journey as a midwife would take me. I started nannying before getting into uni. I cared for one family who had 2 robust and beautiful boys. Their mum, without realising it at the time, was a mentor to me- and told me to go on and live my dreams. She saw how much I loved caring for her boys, but also listened to my story about wanting to be a midwife. She also carried a baby to 25 weeks, with bleeding went into labour and came home with only a bunch of flowers in her arms. She sat with me, and patiently answered my questions, clearly seeing an interest in what was happening in her world right then and there. I moved from Melbourne to Brisbane to be with my heavily pregnant sister at the start of my Grad Year as a midwife. I’d done it…fresh out of Uni, eager to learn and even more excited to be involved in the birth of my first niece or nephew. It turned out that the first baby I would see born as a registered midwife would be blood related to me. An amazing way to enter into my career. Isaac James entered the world into hands of love-my hands. My hands were the first to touch his head, see his eyes and pass him up to his mum and dad. My eyes were also the first to see him be resuscitated unsuccessfully, my mind to sense that something was terribly wrong, and my ears to hear those words that he had died. I took time off after Isaac died. I didn’t really know if I actually was cut out to be a midwife…to do this kind of thing or have the possibility of being involved in something like Isaac’s birth and death again. I questioned if I was really strong enough to tell someone that their baby had died- that seemed too hard for me. I spent most of my days after Isaac died with my sister- or alone. Life was so different, but it still continued on. 26 Member Stor y Once the funeral was over, with her husband back at work, the flowers dying and being thrown out, we had time to just be…sometimes we would fill in time with outings or appointments, but mostly it was time to figure out what this world of grief is, and how to cope with an empty silent house. My role as a sister had changed, my role as an aunty had completely changed to one I could never have imagined, and I didn’t want to be a midwife for many of the weeks that followed. I remember the point when I made the decision to do it. To choose to use this journey that I had experienced to be the best midwife I could be. There’s two particular points I remember. One in a pool in Thailand- watching water ripple over a ledge and dribble down into the stones below. I spent hours reflecting and thinking about how I see my midwifery career as a ‘calling’…something more than just a job. The other point was witnessing the birth of a very dear friend’s baby- sobbing such deep tears as i held that precious new life in my arms- having just witnessed a miracle yet again, and knowing this is what I wanted to do…this is what I wanted to be. I am a midwife. I am a midwife. My most memorable days at work, are those spent just sitting with parents whose babies have died, or did not live for long. Whilst I love witnessing the miracle of life, there is something ‘extra’ that happens in me when I help a mother and father create memories from a life gone too soon. Many midwives I work with know that I love caring for these families. These are the days I walk away from work feeling I have made a difference in someone’s life - and death -, not because I know what I’m doing- clinically I do- but because I know that I can make a positive difference for these families at a time in their lives that is so very hard. The blessing of Isaac is that he has made me a better midwife. I have spent countless hours reflecting on what kind of midwife I want to be. I’ve learnt to trust my ‘gut instinct’ when I sense something isn’t right. I know that sharing my story to some of the families I have worked with has given them a deeper sense of trust and security in me. Every family I meet as a midwife teaches me something new. Each birth, death, appointment, research paper, journal article has the power to change how I practice. I know Isaac has been the biggest cause for change in me. I now have the blessing of being in a role that supports women in a pregnancy after a loss. My journey as a midwife has led me to be in charge of running a Subsequent Pregnancy Clinic at the Mater in Brisbane. I call this ‘my baby’ as it feels like something I’m nurturing and creating. It’s a gift I can give to women who have experienced loss in many forms- early and late in their baby’s lives. Some of these women never met their babies, and some certainly aren’t ready to even think about holding a live baby in their arms. Pregnancy after loss is always hard. It’s about recognising that extra support is needed for these families and that all the emotions of ‘doing it again’ are normal. This is a blessing to me one of which is certainly creating and shaping me on my journey. The women I care for are a blessing to me. I am your midwife. 27 Memb er Stor y Sebastian Ours was an unexpected pregnancy with our baby due a few months before I turned 40. Our little one was an amazing gift that left me a little scared and overwhelmed. I didn’t realise I was pregnant until I was about 7 weeks. We had the nuchal at 12 weeks and all was good. I had my morphology at 20 weeks and prayed that everything would be ok. I was told that everything was good and as my two girls and I watched the monitor we were told that we were having a boy. I was excited and cried from relief. I had another check-up at 25 weeks and I had mentioned to my obstetrician that I felt like I was getting too big too soon and that I felt like my skin was being peeled off my ribcage and was very painful. I could only eat very small portions because the food didn’t seem to have anywhere to go. I didn’t recall feeling this way with my two girls a decade ago; this pregnancy did feel very different to them. My doctor assured me all was ok. Unbeknown to me at the time, these were all symptoms of Sebastian’s condition. I remember the day before going into labour that I had an overwhelming feeling to get my hospital bag and baby things in order almost immediately. I was a few days off being 28 weeks. The following morning on the 11th of October I woke up feeling ok with lots of movement. After getting my two girls off to school I went to purchase a few baby items. By about 12 that day I had just a few sharp jabby pains that never lasted long and from memory were not consistent with labour pains. I had put it down to doing too much walking so I headed home. I put my feet up and rested until my girls got home from school. The pains persisted and close to midnight I said to my husband I think I should go to hospital. My husband went to get my mother who lives just a few minutes away to watch our sleeping girls. We arrived at the hospital and the midwife phoned the doctor and he thought (without even laying eyes on me) I had an irritable uterus and had prescribed medication to stop the contractions and sleeping tablets. From the beginning the midwives had difficulty getting a heartbeat. I was checked into a room for the night, the contractions still persisted. I saw a relieving obstetrician about 7 am in the morning and he did a test that determines if labour is onset. It’s accuracy is 99% and it indicated that I would not be going into labour. The contractions did not recede, I was told I would be having a scan but the hospital was very busy, so I would have to wait. I had a nurse come get me at 11.30, by that point I was feeling very sick and in a lot of pain. I remember there was a trainee diagnostician learning with the qualified one. The pain was so bad I couldn’t lie down on the table for long; I felt like I was dehydrated and clammy and was light headed. I had to stop several times during the scan because the pain was unbearable. The diagnostician had left and come back with her superior to examine me again. Shortly after I was sent back to my room with no explanation of what was going on. This was the point when my son’s terrible abnormality was discovered. I could not take the pain and buzzed the nurses station by about 3pm. My doctor had come into my room shortly after with steroids and painkillers. I was in a lot of pain and he briefly mentioned an abnormality but was very vague about it. I was under 28 Member Stor y the impression it wasn’t a big deal and that I was going to deliver early. I was taken downstairs to the delivery/observation room where I had come in the previous night. The midwives were trying very hard to get a heartbeat, this was proving very difficult because he was moving so much. I was very worried and I asked if I would be having a caesarean and I was told no by one of the midwives because they would want his lungs to be contracted during a delivery. At this point I asked that my husband be phoned and informed. The doctor phoned him and said that our little boy had a congenital diaphragmatic hernia and when he asked what that was he was told to talk to the doctors at the hospital (where) I was being transferred to. When the ambulance arrived the doctor and midwife came with me. I will never ever forget the sounds of the siren in the ambulance trying to get to the hospital before I delivered. When we arrived at the maternity ward at about 7 o’clock that night there were a lot of nurses and doctors waiting. The Neonatal Specialist had given us the facts of Sebastian’s condition and that he had at most a 50% chance of survival. I was absolutely stunned. I had my morphology scan just a few weeks before and was told everything was ok. I had contractions for another 2 hours before it become too dangerous with Sebastian’s heartbeat becoming slower. My waters were broken after over 24 hours of contractions and I felt instant relief. I think my body had had enough and I did not have a single contraction after that. The doctor had to use forceps to deliver and after a 2nd attempt our little boy, Sebastian James Nolan-Smith was born at 9.31pm the 12th October 2010. After all this time it had never occurred to me that he might actually die. He was put onto my stomach and taken away to be worked on just as quickly. My husband and I were in absolute denial and disbelief. Of course Sebastian was going to be ok, he was premature but a lot of babies survive after being born at 28 weeks. The doctor had come back to us about 20 minutes later and had told us that they had done everything they possible could, but he died. I was so numb I don’t even think I cried. The midwife had bought him back to us all dressed and wrapped in a swaddle. We nursed him and the midwife had said to us that our daughters (who were aged 10 and 11) needed to say goodbye to him. So my sister had bought up my mother and my two daughters and Sebastian’s baby clothes. My two girls and I, with the help of the midwife Angela, bathed him and dressed him in his own clothes and bunny rug. Angela also took photos and put them in a little album for us. My girls had a kiss and a cuddle, so did my mother and also my sister who was four months pregnant herself. The hospital organised their Priest and we had a christening at 10pm that night. My family had left and I think soon after my husband had left with our two girls. I stayed with Sebastian and just watched him in his crib until there was a room available at 2 am. Then I nursed him, talked to him, told him how much mummy loves him and always will and sang to him the same song I sang to my girls when they were babies. His little beanie was wet from my tears. I tried to do all the things with Sebastian I could think of because I knew I wouldn’t get another chance. How did it all go so wrong was all I could think? The Neonatal specialist had briefly talked to me of an autopsy early the next morning. In the afternoon when my husband had come to the hospital we decided that we needed to know exactly what went wrong especially considering he had been given a clean bill of health at the morphology scan. I didn’t know how long I should keep him because he was changing colour and rigor mortis was setting in. Reluctantly 29 Memb er Stor y we said a final goodbye at about 4 pm. It was the absolute darkest, condemning, haunting moment in my life that crushed every essence of my soul when I had to hand my precious baby boy over never to see again. I lost a piece of myself forever. I don’t know how I did it without collapsing, I must have been insane. I tried to keep breathing. I had to tell myself, take one breath, take another, take another, it was very robotic. But if I didn’t do this I felt like I would cease breathing. When I arrived home that night I felt like I was living a nightmare. Three days later I was having a lot of pain and had a temperature. My doctor had sent me back to hospital because I was showing signs of infection. I went up to the same ward where I had Sebastian and waited with all the mothers waiting to have their babies. I had to explain on more than one occasion to medical staff the reason for my visit; I was struggling to say the words “I had lost my baby 3 days ago”. I had a lovely lady push me to my scan and was talking about “all us pregnant women” and I just sat there. It was discovered that there were remnants of placenta left which was the cause of the infection. About a week after I left hospital my original obstetrician was back from holidays and had phoned me to discuss the morphology results because the Neonatal Specialist at the Royal Womens was requesting the scan from his practice. He said that upon taking another look at the scan, the abnormality was very clear. He said “The detection of the Diaphragmatic Hernia would not have changed the outcome for this unfortunate baby and at least I didn’t have to go through an abortion”. I was speechless. He reluctantly sent a copy to the hospital. I couldn’t speak to anyone and was trying to organise a funeral and also to locate a beautiful outfit for Sebastian to wear in his casket. Thank goodness for email because I physically could not bring myself to say the words “My son has died and is in the hospital morgue”. My husband and I went in to talk a few days later to discuss all the details for the funeral. No parent should ever have to pick a casket for their baby. We had the funeral. In the casket Sebastian was wrapped in a blue bunny rug that my mother had knitted, there were letters from only my closest family members to him and a toy dinosaur. We had his rosary beads, toys and mementoes of our home spread around his casket. We had flowers from our garden, purple jacaranda flowers from the tree that our girls cubby house is in and photos of our girls favourite toys with his. We picked up Sebastian’s ashes a week later. I had some of them put into a jewellery urn that I wear around my neck and close to my heart and that I will never take off. We keep his ashes in our living room with his photo. We had an appointment with the Neonatal Specialist about 2 months after to discuss the results of the autopsy. After all the information was analysed and tissue samples and chromosomes were tested it showed that everything was perfect. The reason for Sebastian’s Double Diaphragmatic Hernia was nothing more than a one of anomaly. Life is cruel. 30 Memorials Memorials A life, however brief, is still a life – and deserves to be acknowledged and remembered 31 Memorials Harrison Alexandar McKenzie 14th September 2010-15th September 2010 This first year has been a year of should have beens, we should have been able to watch you grow, we should have been able to see your first smile, we should have been able to see you roll, we should have been able to hear your first little giggle, we should have been able to see you crawl for the first time, we should have been able to hear you say mummy and daddy we should have been able to see you take your first step. Gee I wish I could have seen them all. We love you so much, there has not been a day that has gone by that we haven’t thought of you, we talk about you every day. Our lives have been filled with 3 boys running around the house, but our beautiful fourth son Harrison, you have been so missed and there is that empty space in our lives that only you could have filled. We miss you sweet little man. We will be having a very special day on your birthday filled with lots of fun, lots of love and lots of thinking of you. 32 Memorials Thomas To our precious little Thomas: Happy 1st Birthday, Little Love Bug! We miss you SO much and love you dearly. What fun it must be celebrating your first birthday in Heaven with Jesus! Until we see each other again, catch our kisses to Heaven!!! Lots of Love, Mummy, Daddy, Joseph & your Twin Brother Nicholas In memory of Thomas James 27th October 2010 to 28th April 2011. 33 Memorials SEBASTIAN JAMES NOLAN-SMITH BORN 12TH OCTOBER 2010 To My Dearest Sebastian, A year has passed, but not a day has gone by without daddy and I missing you and longing to kiss and hold you every single moment of every day. I’m still learning to live without you, but I’m not doing a very good job. It is a insurmountable task that I have accepted will never happen and that constant sadness is now part of my everyday life. Your two big sisters, Sheridan and Allanah miss you dearly and have your bear with them every single night. Their love keeps me strong enough to face every day without you. I know in my soul that we will be together again and that your aunty is looking after you for now. All of your family miss you and love you dearly. Happy 1st Birthday My Sweetheart. All our love, Mummy, Daddy, Sherry, Nanni and Nanna xxxxx 34 Memorials Charlotte Ava Milligan 31st October 2006 If tears could build a stairway, And memories were a lane, We would walk right up to heaven To bring you down again. No farewell words were spoken, No time to say good-bye. You were gone before we knew it, And only God knows why. Our hearts still ache in sadness And secret tears still flow, What it meant to lose you, No one will ever know. When we are sad and lonely, And everything goes wrong, We seem to hear you whisper "Cheer up and carry on. "Each time we look at your pictures, You seem to smile and say, "Don't cry, I'm only sleeping, We'll meet again someday." ~Unknown 35 Memorials Charlotte Ava Milligan Happy 5th birthday my darling Charlotte Wow! what a big girl you would be now, getting ready for school next year and probably chattering away non stop like your sisters. We miss you so much and think about you everyday. Carry a piece of my heart with you always, until we meet again my baby girl, Love your mummy, daddy, Gabriella and Louisa oxoxoxox 36 Memorials Izaak and Jay In loving memory of my twin boys Izaak and Jay sadly missed every day. 2 years have nearly passed and the sadness of losing you both is still as strong as ever. Missed and loved everyday and never will be forgotten. Love from mummy Daddy sister Cleo and brother Kai I don't need a special day to bring the two of you to mind The days I do not think of you are very hard to find. Each morning when I awake I know that you are both gone And no one knows the heartache as I try to carry on. My heart still aches with sadness and secret tears still flow What it meant to lose you two no one will ever know and the sadness will never go. In memory of Izaak David and Jay Lewis born 14/10/09 EDD 18/2/10 37 Memorials Isabella Grace Smith 13/10/2008 - 25/10/2008 Happy 3rd Birthday our Darling little Girl Isabella Grace Smith Not a day goes by that we don’t miss you, Not a day goes by that we don’t ache to touch you, Not a day goes by that we don’t wish we could see you smile.. The day you died, a piece of us did too. We were left with a big wound, a constant ache. We’ll always have that wound; it’s a reminder of you… And we wouldn’t have it any other way.. You’re so wonderful to think of, but extremely hard to be without… Happy Birthday beautiful girl, you left big footprints on our hearts for such a little girl. Look out for your pink balloons and the candles on your cake. Love Mum, Dad & Harper xxx 38 S ands G eneral Donations Have been gratefully received in loving memory of: Milla Nunan Dart Lily Farris 39 S ands G eneral Little Boho specialises in stylish kindy sleeping bags, as well as trendy baby and toddler manchester and accessory items. $2.00 from the sale of every Kindy Sleeping Bag (pictured below) is donated to SANDS QLD. Please check us out at: www.littleboho.com.au SANDS now has a dedicated email address for all newsletter submissions. [email protected] Please use this address for all submissions or queries regarding the newsletter. This will save everyone a lot of time! FOR NEW READERS If you are a newly bereaved parent reading this newsletter for the first time, please rest assured that you are not alone. We hope that you find confort through the sharing of articles and parent stories. Please call one of our parent listeners, who are bereaved parents. Alternatively email SNADS - [email protected] 40 Memorial Ser vices Many hospitals throughout Queensland hold non-denominational memorial services in memory of all babies born before 20 weeks gestation. Parents, families, friends and staff are welcome to these services. Redcliffe - Caboolture Hospital Memorial Service Memorial services are held on the 3rd Wednesday bimonthly at 4.00pm in the Caboolture Hospital Chapel. The service includes the placement of ashes of the babies cremated from both hospitals, in the memorial garden. For further information please contact: The Hospital on 5433 8888 Ipswich Hospital Memorial Service Memorial services are held on the last Wednesday of each month at 2.00pm under the Poinciana Tree in the Hospital grounds near Court Street. Ashes of the babies cremated from the hospital will be placed in the memorial garden. For further information please contact: The Ipswich General Hospital on (07) 3810 1111 and ask for the Social Work Department or Chaplaincy Mackay Base Hospital/CHEC Services The Mackay Base Hospital/CHEC Services conducts Memorial Services for those who have died (including babies) in connection with the Mackay Base Hospital. Invitations are sent out to those families but anyone is welcome to attend. They are held every two months (the even months) at 7.00pm on a weekday night. For further information please contact: Brenda Sheumack, CHEC Services (07) 4968 6024 or Shirley Worland, Hospital Social Worker on (07) 4968 6000 Redland Hospital Memorial Service At 10.00 am on the last Saturday in February, May, August and November each year a Memorial Service is held in the Hospital Chapel. An integral part of the Service is the placement of baby ashes in the Hospital Memorial Garden. Individual services are offered at other times according to request. For any enquiries please contact the Chaplain (07) 3488 3111. Mater Mother’s Hospital (South Brisbane) Miscarriage Memorial Services are held on the second Wednesday of the month at 4.00pm in the Mater Children’s Chapel on level 3. Ashes of the babies cremated from the hospital will be placed in a specially reserved Memorial Garden which is located off site at Newhaven Memorial Park: 21 Quinns Hill Rd; Stapylton. For further information regarding the Memorial Service please contact the Mater Mother’s Pastoral Care Team on (07) 3163 6729. For information regarding cremation and the interment of the babies ashes in the Memorial Park please contact Newhaven Funerals on (07) 3807 4444. Royal Brisbane and Women’s Hospital Memorial Services are held on the second Thursday by- monthly (January, March,May, July, Sept, Nov) at 2.00pm in the hospital chapel (Ground Floor, Ned Hanlon Building). During the services you will be able to light a candle in memory of your baby. This candle is yours to take home. There is a Memorial Book available for you to add a page if you wish. You might like to bring a poem or a drawing. The Memorial Book is available during the service and at other times by appointment. For further information please contact: Iris Carden (Hospital Chaplain) on (07) 3636 8404 or (07) 3636 8111 Gold Coast Hospital Memorial Services Memorial services are held every two months on the last Tuesday of the month, commencing at 4.00pm. For further information please contact Julie at Metropolitan Funerals on (07) 3263 5044 Nambour Hospital Memorial services will be held on the second Tuesday of the months of January, April, July and October. 11:30am in the hospital chapel. Refreshments after Parents, family and friends are invited to attend. Enquiries to the Chaplaincy Department 54706573 Rockhampton Base Hospital A special space has been developed at the Rockhampton Memorial Gardens to honour babies who die before 20 weeks of pregnancy. This is a community facility open to all parents, family and friends. Three services of remembrance will be conducted in 2010. The services will commence at 12.30pm. The Memorial Garden is located on Lakes Creek Road. For further information please contact one of the Chaplains or social workers on 07 4920 6211. Friday January 22nd 2010 Friday May 21st 2010 Friday September 17th 2010 Townsville SANDS/SIDS Memorial Services The SANDS and SIDS groups in Townsville in co-operation with The Townsville Health Service District and The Mater Hospitals hold memorial services in Anderson Park (Thomas Street end, opposite the Mater Hospital on Fulham Rd). Mothers Day -7th May 2011 - 5:30pm Christmas Memorial - 26th November 2011 @ 6.00pm For further information please contact: Marie on (07) 4774 6521(ah) or (07)4775 5957 (w) Toowoomba SANDS Rock of Remembrance Memorial Service. Services are conducted at the Garden of Remembrance Ruthven St South, Toowoomba and are held February, June, October , on the last Friday of the month at 2pm. The service includes the placement of babies’ ashes at the Rock. Family and friends are invited to take part in the service. Phone Karen Hinrichsen 4635 4866 / Loretta Callaghan 041189776 41 Membership 42 Sands Contac ts Listener Service Listeners SANDS (Qld) Listeners are volunteer bereaved SANDS parents who have experienced the death of their baby and have had support training. If you are having a bad day, or just want to chat to someone who has been there, please give them a call. The parents are on call 24 hours/7 days, however they are volunteers, so if you reach an answering machine, please leave a message so they can get back to you as soon as they are able. If you need to talk to someone urgently please ring one of the other listeners on roster or SANDS office. Brisbane & Suburbs To contact a Listener within Brisbane and surrounding suburbs please ring the SANDS Office on (07) 3254 3422. Please have a pen and paper handy as you will receive a recorded message giving the names and phone numbers of Listeners who are currently on roster to take your call. Messages can be left on the office line (# 1), however please do not leave messages on the Listener’s line (# 2). 1800 228 655 The 1800 228 655 number is a free call number that SANDS has available for parents outside the Brisbane area. The number is diverted from the SANDS office to the telephone number of one of our volunteer Listeners. The 1800 number is never answered in our office. Regional Areas Where possible, regional Contacts are bereaved parents. If not, then they are professionals who may be able to put you in contact with a bereaved parent in your area. If there are no contacts near you, ring 1800 228 655, please leave a message and the listener will return your call as soon as possible. If you cannot contact a listener, please ring the Sands office. Regardless of where you are in Queensland or Northern New South Wales, you can receive the newsletter, borrow from the library, and use our web page. AyrJulianne 07 4783 2885 BiloelaSandy(07) 4992 1462 Bundaberg Michelle/Rod (07) 4151 2599 Cairns/Tableland Nerissa (07) 4098 3089 Kelly(07) 4033 7917 Charters Towers Diana (07) 4787 7338 Clifton/Millmerran/ Pittsworth Helen (07) 4695 3123 Denman/MuswellbrookTanya (02) 6547 9284 Jimboomba Karen (07) 5547 8431 Longreach Jenny (07) 4658 9227 Mackay Julie (07) 4959 3781 Maryborough Monique (07) 4123 3642 Miles Emma (07) 4628 5629 Mt Isa Sharon (07) 4743 4449 Rockhampton Karen (07) 4936 1329 Linda(07) 4927 4960 Sunshine Coast Anne (07) 5491 2469 Melissa (07) 5441 3456 Tambo Jenny (07) 4654 6266 Toowoomba Loretta 0411897765 Townsville Marie AH (07)4774 6521 BH (07)4775 5957 Warwick Norma (07) 4661 9590 Winton Joyce (07) 4657 2700 If you are interested in supporting other parents in your area, please contact the office on 07 3254 3422 to talk about the role you might like to take on. 43 SANDS (QLD) INC NEWSLETTER PRINT POST PP 43340/00008 If undelivered, please return to: SANDS (QLD) INC PO BOX 934 NEW FARM QLD 4005 The Sands POSTAGE PAID BRISBANE QLD AUST WISH LIST Family and Friends who cannot attend the Walk to Remember can make a donation in memory of their baby/ies. Donations can be made at: www.everydayhero.com.au/brisbane_walk_to_remember
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