1. business and industrial
2. agriculture and forestry
3. farms and ranches

Force of Nature by garvaldmains
Summary: Jared Padalecki is furious. His father gave the position of Vice President
of Padalecki Oil to his older brother/rival, Jeff. Jared is desperate to make his father
as angry as he himself is. Jared comes up with the perfect plan. He’s going to marry
one of the Ackles, the family that continues to be a thorn in his father’s side. Not just
any Ackles, but a male Ackles. Has Jared bit off more than he can chew, however,
when he meets the force of nature that is Jensen Ackles?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC17
Chapters: 24, Word count: 90,861
Chapter 1 Published: 10/28/2009
Chapter 24 Published: 12/23/2009
Story Notes:
Won by one of my LJ friends, phillydogg, in a charity auction...
Chapter 1
“Sit down boys,” Gerald Padalecki said firmly, his back to the Dallas skyline and his
arms folded across his chest. They complied with his request… more of a
command… both sliding into the leather chairs opposite the desk, both with different
expression, both his sons.
Jeff was the mirror of his dad, tall, strong, not averse to getting his own way through
means that others may consider somewhat underhand or devious. He achieved good
things for Padalecki Oil, very good things. Under his control the company had grown
in strength due to some well placed deals and some serious, if somewhat
questionable pay offs to just the right people. It was how TexOil had got to be where
it was today, the second largest oil company in Dallas, billions passing through their
coffers on an annual basis, a staff of over seven hundred just in the head office
alone. Jeff was a chip off the old block, he knew when to deal, when to back off,
when to buy off, it was a joy for an old man to watch. Jeff was sitting calmly in his
chair, his back straight, a calm, virtually inexpressive demeanour, and his eyes like
chips of ice. He was dressed in dark grey Armani, perfectly groomed, his shirt crisp
and white and his tie a deep maroon, his manicured nails on fingers that lay placed
just so on the material of his pants and he had an air of expectancy that layered
about him in palpable waves. Gerald couldn’t have been prouder of his eldest son,
the right choice to form part of the new era of TexOil, his student and his success.
Jared was sitting just as calm, his middle son, nearly as tall as his brother, nearly as
cold, nearly. He too was wearing Armani, this time a charcoal black, with a black silk
shirt and no tie. He exuded confidence, the same confidence as his older brother,
just the same, but with a subtle difference, he was a softer version of his brother,
enjoyed the money that the Padaleckis had way more than was really necessary, but
under his guidance R&D had flourished, and Gerald was as proud of his middle child
as he was of his oldest but for very different reasons. He had the way of his mother
about him, softer, with her artistic heart, he made decisions driven by that heart too
many times to make Gerald entirely happy with leaving TexOil under his middle son’s
control for any length of time. Still Jared deserved a place at TexOil; after all it was
his legacy too. Jared looked tired today, and Gerald glanced down at the Dallas
Morning News on his desk, knowing what was on page seven, the gossip pages,
knowing what was in evidence before him, and knowing it made his decision easier.
“How is Kristen?” He asked Jeff conversationally, glancing over at the pictures
grouped on one side of his desk; his family, Jeff with his arms around his perfect
blonde wife, with his two grandchildren posed just so. It filled him with pride to see
that, the TexOil generations to carry on the Padalecki name, and he glanced at
photos of his youngest, Megan, and at Jared, both in their photos alone, both for very
different reasons.
Sighing he unfolded his arms, not knowing that what he was about to say, would
change the face of TexOil forever.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeffery Dean Morgan was pissed. He could only imagine what the young man was
going through at this very minute, and he knew someone had to go and find him
before he took a gun to his father’s head. He had watched as Gerald and the
favoured son had left, the older man’s arm loose across Jeff’s shoulders, their heads
close in conversation and it cut him to the core. It was JD that had prepared the legal
papers; JD that had argued against the idiocy that was Padalecki senior was going to
do. Someone had to be on Jared’s side in this whole freaking mess, even if it meant
this was the end of his tenure at TexOil, and he knew where to find Jared. Taking the
elevator, he left at the sixty-fifth floor, following the darkening corridor to the map
room. It was the one place that Jared could always be found if the stress of his family
got too much, sitting cross-legged on the floor poring over his beloved maps. He
would spend hours with the geological surveys, the statistical results, his instinct for
oil leading R&D to make decisions that had quadrupled TexOil’s output over the last
two years. It astounded Jeffery Dean that such a young man, only twenty seven, had
such an instinct, and it reminded him of the old days, when Gerald and Alan would fly
by the seat of their pants to locate new oil reserves based on nothing other than
instinct.
He hesitated outside the door, steeling himself for what he would find within. Jared
was rightly going to be furious with JD for withholding the legal changes at TexOil
from him, considered JD a friend and as such had the right to expect more. Breathing
deeply he pushed open the door to find the large room echoing and in darkness, the
only light from the closing Texas evening and the growing glow of the city outside. It
wasn’t difficult to locate Jared; JD could almost touch the anger radiating from the tall
man who was standing at the window silhouetted in the increasing gloom. JD said
nothing, just closing the door behind him and leaning against it, loosening his tie and
focusing hard on the tension that held Jared still and quiet against the glass.
“Twenty two percent,” Jared finally said, his words clipped and tense. He could see
JD reflected in the glass, hesitating, lost, just waiting for the explosion. JD had
known. He had known as soon as the figures hit the desk. For fucks sake, he was the
company’s lawyer, he would have been the one to write up the contracts for
handover, would have known the full details for three days longer than Jared.
The same feelings were spinning in JD’s head; only his anger at what Gerald had
forced him to do was manifesting itself in guilt. God knows he had wanted to say
something, every time he looked at the young man who worked so damn hard for this
company he had wanted to tell Jared what his father was planning. Never the right
moment, never the right reason, and now… now he was paying for the betrayal,
“Jared?”
Temper snapped and spit from Jared, “Fucking less than a third, the same as my
sister,” Jared started pacing, gesturing with his hands, frustration in every
exaggerated movement. JD grimaced; he knew that the percentage his sister got
wasn’t the point of Jared’s temper. Jared was close to his sister, loved her and her
shopping ways, and didn’t begrudge his Paris Hilton wannabe sister anything. No,
the point was that it hadn’t been fair at all, with his brother, his acknowledged bastard
of a stepford brother that had just been handed forty-eight percent of TexOil, and
effective control of the company.
In a flurry of sudden but controlled movement Jared spun on his heel, throwing
whatever was in his hand across the room, missing JD by inches. It was a mapreader, fifty thousand dollars of technology smashed into fractured pieces against
glass walls, and then it began. The words that JD had been expecting.
“He sat there, in his fucking throne room, and he took everything away from me and
gave it all to Jeff.” The temper in Jared was high and rare, and JD flinched as he
stalked around the tables that separated them with no direction other than just to
walk, “and do you know why?” He stopped, grabbed at the newspapers that were
lying in a tangled mess on the final map table by the door, and in one motion Jared
swept everything other than one sheet off onto the floor. He jabbed at the picture that
had been snapped the night before, Jared and Chad at a club, arms around each
other, Chad with his usual wide smile, Jared looking somewhat worse the wear from
his brush with Jack and Jose, “this.”
JD looked at the photo, it was the usual blurred type photo from the paparazzi that
followed Jared, playboy prince with a bottomless pit of money, everywhere. Jeff
shook his head. Now he was really confused and couldn't understand what Jared
was getting at. Gerald had explained very clearly that his eldest son was the best for
the company, the one switched on to commerce, the one with the business brain. He
hadn’t listened when JD had pointed out the amazing upturn in R&D, the increase in
oil locations, the way Jared was so committed to TexOil, had just shaken his head,
as if he couldn’t believe, or didn’t want to believe. “The photo?” JD wasn’t stupid, the
photo didn’t exactly show Jared in his best light maybe, the blur of his smile and the
amount of skin on display as he was tumbling half in and half out of the cab, stopping
obviously to pose with his best friend.
“He said…” Jared paused, a sneer on his face, “that the friendship I have with Chad
is unhealthy…unhealthy, shit… he was concerned by Chad’s association with the
Ackles,” the name Ackles came out on a spit and a sneer, the perfect take off of how
Gerald Padalecki would have said it, how JD knew he would have said it. “Oh, and
also, because I haven’t got myself a brood mare like my oh so fucking perfect
brother, then of course I must be confused about my sexuality.” JD winced, both at
the description of Jeff’s wife as a brood mare, and at the whole confusion statement.
Chad Michael Murray, best friend of Jared’s since college was openly bisexual, but
Jared… Jared had a different woman every night, younger, older, rich, poor, it didn’t
matter... however it panned out Jared always had tail. “Said I should look at him and
mom,” again with the sneer, the temper that twisted his normally calm face, “fuck.
Like my mom has the perfect husband in my dad, like Jeff had the perfect fucking
marriage with Kristen and her drinking…” his voice tailed off, the venom in it spitting
and harsh as he dismissed the marriages of his closest family as facades, society
based, financially arranged, facades.
“Jared - ” JD started, think maybe a time out here, some down time, may be good.
“No, JD… no,” Jared interrupted, his hands clenched in fists, “know what he said…”
Jared stopped, off course JD knew what Padalecki senior had said, after all it would
have been JD that had written the damn contract, Jared bowed his head,
disappointment at his friends betrayal, and at the same time his heart full of sadness
that his dad had forced JD into this position now. “He said, if I married in the next
three months, got myself some stable brood mare time, stayed married for a year, he
would hand over more of TexOil, not based on the work I do, or the fact that without
me TexOil would have been landless for the next eighteen months, but based on my
ability to produce children. I mean, what the fuck JD, this is the twenty first century
not the nineteenth.”
“I know.” JD said simply, holding his hands up in his defence, “I tried Jared, I tried to
get him to see sense. I’m so sorry…” He knew his voice sounded exhausted, sad,
tired, all the emotions that were trapped inside at what he had had to do swimming to
the surface, pushing through the civility he had to show to the world whenever he
was at the office. It was almost as if his words pushed through Jared’s temper as
sudden and as final as a knife and Jared visibly deflated in front of JD, his head
bowed, his normally contained long hair loose around his face, his temper just below
the surface.
“How do I do this JD? How do I fucking show the bastard that he can’t win, that he
can’t push me to marry just to get what was rightfully mine anyway?” he looked up
through his bangs, the dim light from outside the window casting shadows across
high cheekbones and green hazel eyes, his lower lip caught in his teeth, pain on his
face like JD had never seen before. “I work fucking hard for this company, I gave up
Stanford for this freaking company, it’s taken everything I have, what more can I do?”
“So we find someone for you to marry Jared, some quiet Texan debutante who will
agree to a pre-nup, yeah? Someone that ticks the boxes, and then after this year,
this prescribed year is up, you can quietly divorce.” Jared wanted to say he couldn’t
do that, wanted to say that no woman in her right mind would agree to this, but knew
that the chance of marrying JT Padalecki, was going to bring everyone out of the
woodwork fairly begging for the chance.
“I can’t do that,” Jared said simply… “I wont give dad the satisfaction of winning like
this.”
JD sighed, “so you let him win by not doing it then, for him it is a win-win situation,
let’s face it, you either let him win by doing something, or you let him win by doing
nothing, either way Jared, you are fucked.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Chad climbed over Jared’s long legs to push himself in the corner, his face twisted in
concern as yet another night Jared had pushed it so far with the drinking that he was
near unconscious. He had been told the whole sorry mess; even to the point that he
knew he own very liquid sexuality had been brought into play, as well as his less than
liked friendship with Mackenzie Ackles. He was sorry, had even said so to a clearly
drunk under the table Jared, got himself bitch slapped for the words, and then
hugged until he couldn’t breathe with undying promises of forever friendship carried
on vapours of neat whisky into his ears. So here tonight, with just one more day
added to the list of days where he didn’t go to the monstrosity in the sky that was
TexOil, one more day where alcohol pushed him to unconsciousness in Chad’s
company, Chad had kind of reached the limit of how much more he could watch his
best friend go through.
“I saw’ya, in’ parking” Jared slurred, his pupils blown with exhaustion and whisky, his
hands gripping hard on Chad’s arm. Chad blinked carefully, not sure where this was
starting, but pretty sure it was going to end up with a pity party for one. “With
tha’Ackles girl.” Jared seemed proud of himself that he had managed to string those
few words together, and smiled, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes, eyes blurred and
exhausted with a killing grief.
“Mac is my friend,” Chad said simply, it was the easiest way to defuse the comments
Jared would start making about his dad and the Padalecki Ackles feud.
“SheessanAckles,” Jared slurred, nodding to emphasise the words, spilling half his
whisky over his jeans, the rest downed in one heated swallow. Chad sighed. So, this
evening was going to be one of the why does my family hate the Ackles evenings.
Instead he was surprised when Jared suddenly lifted his head, fire in his eyes,
“thas’it, I’ll marry Mac Ackles,” Chad’s eyes widened comically, Jared and Mac?
“Jared, man, Mac is eighteen,” Jared looked monetarily phased, blinking steadily.
“I’ll marry Josh’en,” he pointed out carefully.
“Josh is already married man,” Chad was seeing where this was going, that only
really left
“Jen’en,” Jared muttered under his breath, “th’all fuck’em, he’s’gay, Jen’en.”
Chad carefully prised off Jared’s fingers from his arm, opening his cell and calling for
a cab, when his friend started talking stupid like this, it really was time to get him
home.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++
JD stared back at Jared with a horrified look on his face.
“Are you sure that is even legal?”
“Isn’t that your job to find out Mr legal person?” Jared said simply, “I looked on
Wikipedia…” JD snorted, freaking Wikipedia, “you do the research but know this JD,
Chad tells me, I know the Ackles are in the shit, since Alan died… I know…”
“Jared - ” JD wanted to stop this.
“JD, this could make it a win-win situation for me and for Ackles.”
“Jared - ”
“Write it up and we’ll call a meeting, get Ackles here… to…” Jared’s voice tailed off,
and he swallowed, standing to look out of his office window, his head thick with
hangover, finding it hard to string sentences together with the whisky scarred thunder
in his head.
“To propose a same sex marriage that probably isn’t even legal…” JD offered
helpfully. Jared grimaced, when JD put it like that it did sound kind of bad.
“Yeah,” he said, a little uncertainly, twisting one hand in his long hair, an unconscious
gesture he always made when he wasn’t sure, then dropping his hand and squaring
his shoulders, sudden steel in his spine.
“If your dad finds out I had anything to do with you and this stupid idea…” JD winced,
as Jared stood tall and leaned down to his old friend.
“I will get my share and I will fuck with my dad. I will get Jensen Ackles in, and I will
make him say yes to marrying me.”
Chapter 2
The tall man pushed his way through the revolving doors, the dust of Texas on worn
jeans, a Stetson in his hand and denim stretched tight across broad shoulders. He
paused on the threshold, scanning the foyer, stamping mud off of boots onto the
pristine carpet and casting his eyes down the list of offices held in the tower. It wasn’t
difficult to spot TexOil given that they covered floors forty-five to seventy-three and
he started to walk to the elevator only to be blocked by a security guard who casually
looked him up and down.
“Sir? Can I ask you to book in at the front desk?” he said quietly, gesturing behind the
man, his hand firm on the cowboy’s arm. The man shrugged off the touch and turned
on his heel, slapping his worn Stetson against the jeans and releasing a small cloud
of dust into the rarefied air-conditioned coolness.
“I sure can,” he drawled to the guard behind him and strode towards the front desk to
the section marked with the TexOil logo. The women behind the desk was young, no
more than twenty and a little flummoxed at the man that stood in front of her. She
was used to urban style, city suits, perfect hair, clipped tones that bordered on rude,
not this… for want of a better word… cowboy that leaned down on the counter,
stubble on his face and eyes that promised sin. She traced his face, plush warm lips,
eyelashes that brushed his cheekbones as he blinked at her, and she had to push
her professionalism to the front to force out the standard words.
“Welcome to TexOil, how may I assist you?”
“I have a meetin’ darlin,” the tall man drawled, his voice deep and verging on a growl.
“Can I ask your name?” she said, opening the diary on the screen and clicking on the
search option.
”Ackles,” the tall man replied, “Jensen Ackles, A, C, K, L, E, S.” She typed the letters
in and Jensen smirked, she was obviously too new to be privy to the office gossip
around the Ackles/Padalecki rivalry.
“That’s fine sir,” she scanned and handed him a security badge, with the TexOil logo
and a code, “If you take the elevator to the sixty-fourth floor, someone will be waiting
for you Mr Ackles.”
“Thank you Ma’am,” he said softly, clipping the security pass to his shirt and moving
past the guard, nodding his head in polite acknowledgment, and standing at the
elevator, his head focusing on what the hell ever had made him come here today.
The elevator arrived suddenly, rising him from his introspection and he moved to one
side letting some other people in before moving inside and selecting his floor. The
elevator was all glass and moved upward along an internal wall, and suddenly
uncomfortable he imperceptibly moved to the middle of the elevator, he never had
liked heights. The girls that had got in the elevator with him were laughing and
giggling behind him, talking in hushed whispers, although he did hear the word cute
and ass, assuming they were talking about him, not because he often heard that but
that they also used the word dirty cowboy. Jensen smirked; Padalecki was not going
to be expecting a man hot from half a days work straight to the city with the dirt of
hard work on his body and the sweat of labour from every pore. Still there was no
way Jensen was going to make a freakin’ effort for any Padalecki, much to his
mother’s disgust.
“You’re as good as they are,” she had said as he climbed into his truck, “going as you
are… what are you trying to say?”
“That I work hard and that I don’t have time for their bullshit momma,” he said tiredly,
pulling her into a final hug as she tutted and fussed with his shirt, pulling together
another button, hiding skin from view. They had looked at the letter together this
morning, as he made the final decision whether to go or not. It wasn’t even from
TexOil, but a private letter from a JD Morgan, inviting him for a discussion with one
Jared Padalecki at 2pm on the next Tuesday. They hoped he could make it, couldn’t
put much in the letter, but it was a sensitive subject and one that may well be to
Jensen Ross Ackles’ advantage. Donna looked concerned. It was a perpetual
expression on her face these days, and Jensen hated that there was seemingly
nothing he could do to help, or to make her life easier. They had no secrets, not a
single one between Jensen and his momma, Jensen the man of the house the
minute Josh left to practise law the next town over. Jensen juggled the ranch, the
only thing left to the Ackles now, and that only because it had been passed down by
Donna’s side of the family and was outside of Alan’s involvement altogether.
Jensen had the letter in his pocket as the elevator lights climbed each floor.
Whispering girls got off on thirty-nine, Jensen inclining his head politely as they left,
leaving him and a suited guy on his cell phone tapping furiously at tiny keys and
muttering under his breath. He got out at fifty-seven, which left Jensen with, he
guessed, thirty seconds to prepare himself for whatever was behind the doors when
they opened on his floor, and casually he turned away from the glass and to the
mirrored wall that was at the back. What he saw made him smile wryly, he was the
epitome of cowboy rancher, from the dirt under his nails to the Stetson that was worn
for practicality and not for fashion, to the worn leather boots on his feet. He didn’t
know what Jared was expecting, didn’t really know much of the middle Padalecki in
the tower, other than he was a friend of Chad who Jensen really only knew was a
friend in need to Mac.
He sighed as the elevator indicated his floor and he turned to face the front, blinking
at the man who stood on the other side of the glass door, an older man with a neat
beard and a sharp pale grey suit, his hands casually in his pockets and his face
carefully prepared with a practised smile. The doors slid open and the older man
extended a hand in welcome.
“Mr Ackles.” He said politely as Jensen took his hand in a firm handshake, his head
wondering whom the hell this was offering his hand. “JD Morgan,” the man said,
inclining his head that Jensen should walk this way, “I guess you got my letter,” it was
a rhetorical question and if he was expecting Jensen to be so stupid as to answer it
he was swinging in the breeze. “Mr Padalecki is waiting for us in the map room,” he
finished carefully, stopping at the door marked with a simple room number and
nothing else. He knocked, listened for the ’enter’ inside and opened the door, waiting
to allow Jensen to enter first.
It was brightly lit inside the room this Morgan guy called the map room, and when
Jensen looked at first glance he could see PCs and maps, adorning walls, rolled in
piles to one side and spread out on tables under lit for detail he guessed. No sign of
the elusive Jared, he thought as he scanned the room, starting as a face jumped up
from behind one of the map desks, and unfolded to reveal one Jared Padalecki to
stand tall in front of him.
“Ackles,” he said simply, not much Texan in that voice it seemed, and he extended
his hand in greeting, Jensen moved forward, cocking his hip against the table and
leaning, his voice dripping with the south.
“Padalecki.” He replied, grasping at the outstretched hand and shaking it firmly.
“You got our letter,” Jared pointed out waving in his direction and moving backwards
away from Jensen.
“I got the letter from Mr Morgan.” Jensen agreed carefully, his eyes trailing every inch
of the tall man in front of him. It wasn’t the first time he had met Jared, they had
frequented the same establishments, drinking or otherwise, Jensen more Jeff’s age,
but certainly not in Jeff’s circle. The older brother carried the same hate for anyone
with the Ackles surname as Gerald Padalecki did, and he wondered if Jared felt the
same way.
”It was deliberately vague,” Jared started, “cos there is something, well quite a few
things, we kind of need to discuss.”
“I’ll leave you both,” JD said and left, Jensen bewildered and trying not to show it.
“Is your daddy joining us?” Jensen finally said, cataloguing every expression that
crossed Jared’s face at his words, disbelief and was that anger? Interesting.
”What we talk about here… has nothing to do with my father.” Jared said his lips
pressed together when he finished in a determined line, one of his hands moving to
touch his hair and then dropping. Jensen followed the action, at the perfect layers
pushed back of a high forehead, at the hand that hovered uncertainly and then
dropped, seeing the habit that maybe Jared was trying to contain along side any hint
of personality in his thousand dollar suits and with his carefully knotted tie.
“So why am I here Padalecki?”
“Jared… please... call me Jared…”
Jensen narrowed his eyes, this was altogether far too friendly, and Padaleckis never
normally approached him, let alone asked him to call them by their first names.
“Jensen,” he finally offered, following Jared as he walked through a side door and
into an office. There was no name on the door, but it was a plush thick carpeted
office shiny and wooden smart with a view of the city.
“Coffee?” Jared offered.
“Lets just get on with whatever Padalecki scheme is gonna screw with us this time,”
Jensen sighed, almost tiredly, he owed it to his mom to find out what they wanted,
but playing games was not on his list. Jared stood still by the desk, just stood there,
his hands in his pockets, and Jensen stared, Jared was tall, had always been nearly
as tall as Jeff, and definitely taller than Jensen himself. They hadn’t talked before,
never had occasion to, and despite often seeing Jared’s photos in magazines and
papers, had never seen hazel eyes so clear, or cheekbones so defined in a man. He
was certainly easy on the eyes, Jensen couldn’t discount that, tall and muscled and
almost poured into his dark suit, definitely someone that would catch his eye if he
were out looking.
“Not wanting to screw with you Jensen, just want to talk.” Jared finally said sitting
down on one of the sofas to the side and indicating Jensen should join him, which he
finally did, sliding to sit across and almost opposite, hands on his knees, Stetson still
in his hands. “I know about the ranch,” Jared started, almost carefully, knowing this
was going to be hard.
“The ranch?” Jensen tried to keep the tension out of his voice, he hadn’t been
expecting the ranch to come up, expected some shit about his dad again. The ranch
had been nothing to do with his dad, it was his moms, his, no person was gonna
mess with the ranch.
“I know you have financial difficulties there, that time have been kind of hard, that the
ranch is supporting taxes for your daddy.” Steel shot down Jensen’s spine and he sat
straight, sudden and straight. “I want to offer you a way of getting out of that, of not
losing the ranch.” Jensen blinked steadily, what the fuck?
“We are not for sale,” Jensen said simply, his face incredulous, his heart thumping in
his chest belying the calm on the surface.
“No, I’m not looking to buy the D,” Jared reassured; Jensen frowning that playboy
Padalecki even knew the name of the ranch. “I’m looking for another way that maybe
I can help you financially, pay off the ranch debts, the death taxes, release you so
you can make the ranch pay for itself again.” Jensen scooted forward, his temper
starting to build in the base of his spine, what the fuck was this man on? “This is
gonna sound like the strangest thing but…” Jared hesitated, standing and crossing to
the window and staring at the city below, the haze of afternoon sun glinting from
glass, the rush of people a fluid river below.
Jensen wasn’t pushing this, was just sitting, dusty and tired in worn denim, and
Jared, for some strange reason was really finding it hard to concentrate. Actually
standing here, trying to word the proposal, jeez the proposal, Jared was unable to
actually push the words out there.
“A year,” he started, “I would need your help for a year, with a contract and
everything, and in return I would agree to pay off every debt and pay you on top of
that.”
“A year of what, working, what?”
“No, a year of marriage, I want, need, a partner, a married partner for one year and
for many reasons, not least of which is giving me a win-win situation with my dad,”
“Marriage,” Jensen hadn’t quite got the thread of this, “you… and me?” Jared nodded
earnestly, crossing to stand in front of Jensen his hands still in his pockets.
“So what do you think?” he asked of the man who sat seemingly in shock. Backing
away as Jensen stood Jared remained hopeful that that pathetic attempt at
convincing Jensen had actually worked.
Jensen waited for a second, again with steady blinking, tension close in his body, his
eyes like flint. “I’ll tell you what I think Padalecki, I think your family have fucked with
me and my mine one too many times, so I’ll be going now, chalking this crazy shit up
to a fuckin’ bad dream and a waste of my time.” Jensen moved to the door, and
Jared watched him, what could he say to stop him, other than the one thing he was
trying to hold back, the one thing he hadn’t wanted to say.
“Jensen please, can you just listen?”
“Fuck you,” parting words even as Jensen’s hand was on the door, distaste and
anger dripping from his voice.
There was only the one more thing, the last thing, the only leverage Jared really had
and it fell from his lips quickly and suddenly and with steel in his words.
“I know what you need, I know about Mackenzie.”
Chapter 3
Jensen stopped, the door half open, grief and a sudden anxiety twisted in him before
calm returned and he analysed Jared’s words dispassionately. Anyone who read the
Dallas Times knew about Mac, it was open knowledge that Mac had a congenital
heart problem, had been ill on and off for most of her life, had spent more time in
hospital than out. But Jared’s tone, the sly use of the words I know about Mac,
something didn’t sound right.
Medical bills had piled up, but the Ackles had worked their way through, it is what
they did. It left them near broke, it didn’t matter, Mac had got her medical treatment,
the operations, the drugs she needed, they managed and they certainly didn’t need
any help, financially or otherwise. So if Jared freaking Padalecki thought that bringing
up Mac was gonna swing things his way, he had another thing coming.
Jensen laughed low in his throat, half turning, “Padalecki, after the Dallas Times
spread, everyone knows about Mac, and there is nothing you can give her that is
better than what we can. That was lame and kinda sad.” He turned back to the door
ready to leave, walking away... end of subject.
Jared’s next words froze Jensen in his movement to leave, “my money can’t help
make her better but it can help her get through her pregnancy.”
Jensen stopped, his back to Jared, emotions flooding him, shock, disbelief, pain,
anger at Jared’s lies and he turned slowly, the flash of panic, of anger, still in his
eyes, barely concealed… what did Jared mean, pregnancy, what pregnancy? She
couldn’t be pregnant; the doctors had said carrying a child full term could kill her, that
her heart couldn’t take it.
Jared winced at the naked pain in the older man’s eyes, sudden guilt flashing through
him, a twinge of sympathy and self-hatred at what he had revealed even as he saw
Jensen really hadn’t known.
“Fuck you, Padalecki. Pregnancy or not, we’ll manage, she’ll have an abortion.”
Jensen said simply, that was the solution, if this was true, then she’ll just have to
terminate, he wasn’t going to lose his sister after trying for so many years to keep her
alive.
Jared hesitated, measuring his words, his expression carefully blank. “All you can
hope is that she lives through it, it’s too late to abort now, far too late.” Jared’s words
dripped like ice, and Jensen’s eyes widened even as he tried to tell himself this
fucking bastard was lying. As he imagined his sister pregnant, close to killing herself,
not telling him, it was disbelief that shot through him, she wouldn’t have kept it a
secret, would have told Jensen, if not Josh, or their mom? Unconsciously the sudden
overwhelming force of what Jared was saying exposed something in Jensen that
Jared cringed to see, an unexpected vulnerability. Suddenly, winning back his place
at TexOil or not, he suddenly felt like the worst person on the planet to be revealing
this shit to the man in front of him.
“Marry me,” Jared blurted out suddenly, watching as Jensen straightened his spine,
his shoulder’s back, any hint of vulnerability disappearing from his expressive face,
Jard continued, “Marry me and I will get the best doctors.” It was now or never, be
the bastard who forces this man into marriage, or be the compassionate man who
steps back. His betrayal at the hands of his dad, the anger that burnt full and heavy
in his gut pushed nice Jared away and he continued, with a hint of derision in his
voice. “I know people, my money can buy people. I can get the best for Mac; have
medical help on call twenty-four seven, all you have to do is say yes. Just one year,
your debts are paid, the ranch is free from mortgage and death duties, and your
sister lives, just one year.”
Jensen blinked steadily, his head spinning, his heart pounding in his chest. He
couldn’t focus on Padalecki or what he was saying. He needed to see Mac. She
would tell him this was all wrong, that Padalecki was lying.
Without a single word he left, pulling the door shut behind him and hesitating only
briefly, getting his breath, before moving to the glass lift, not even realising what he
was doing, or where he was going, only knowing Padalecki didn’t follow, and
thanking god that he didn’t, or Jensen knew he would have likely killed him.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The journey back to the D was torturously slow, the noise of horns and swearing in
the Dallas rush hour, as streams of tangled traffic impeded Jensen’s progress home.
It was a good hour until the D was in his sights, and he had thought of nothing other
than betrayal and fear. She hadn’t told him. That is because it isn’t true. His beautiful
sister was dying. It isn’t true. His beautiful younger sister, the very person that had
shaped him as a man, was lying to him? It cant be true.
He found her sitting quietly in the sun room, the Texas sun burning lower in the sky,
an ethereal light about her head as she traced words on the page of her book, her
lips moving soundlessly to the music in her IPod. She looked impossibly young,
heartbreakingly beautiful, fragile, but like a veil had been lifted from his eyes, Jensen
could see how pale she was, and his eyes instinctively went to her middle looking for
a bump.
He moved into her eye line, and she started at the sudden intrusion into her space,
pulling the ear buds out and smiling up at her older brother. The smile turned to a
frown as she saw the expression on his face, the grief twisting his features and her
gentle heart stopped for a second. She watched without word as he fell to his knees
next to her chair, his hands curled into the hem of her dress, his eyes pleading. And
she knew. Somehow he had found out…
“Mac,” his voice broke, as tears collected in his eyes, and he watched as instant
tears started to track down his sister’s pale cheeks. He didn’t need to ask if it was
true, he could see it in her eyes, see the pain there, the guilt. “Why… why couldn’t
you tell me?” …you tell me everything…
Mac couldn’t form the words, wasn’t sure how she could explain, even as she saw
her strong brother on his knees with tears in his eyes, grabbing at her as if she was
going to fall.
The book on her lap dropped to the floor, the noise breaking into her own tears and
she caught her brother’s hand tight, pushing it against her stomach, where she was
only just starting to show, “I couldn’t kill my daughter,” she said simply, and winced
as Jensen’s hand pressed harder against her soft skin, his head suddenly bowing,
but not before she saw the grief in his eyes.
“A daughter?” he finally managed to push out, wanting to scream, to rail at her, to call
her stupid, and an idiot, anger curling in him. Anger stilling at the touch of her hand
over his.
“Please… Jensen…” her voice was broken, she had imagined this from the day she
found out, the hour, the minute that her closest sibling found out what she had done,
what had happened, knew it would bring the strong man that was her brother to his
knees, but not imagining it literally. “…please… I don’t know what to do.” She bowed
her head, her dark blonde hair falling across her neck and Jensen looked close at her
jade eyes, their mother’s eyes, at her pale skin, seeming to notice for the first time
the exhaustion bracketing her eyes. How had he not noticed? Not seen her with a
boyfriend, not noticed how ill she was looking, after all these years of reading his
sister, how had he failed her so badly this time? Guilty he removed his gaze from her,
lowering his eyes, the ranch, the money, balancing the exhaustion of twenty hour
days, especially recently with foaling, with the finances of debt repayment… it had
taken him away from the one thing that was important in his life… family.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” He finally asked as calmly as he could, didn’t want her
spooked at his question, but needing to know.
“I didn’t want to kill my baby Jensen, I knew you would want me too…” Jensen
blanched, the taking of life, especially that of a tiny defenceless baby, because to
Jensen that is what it was from the moment of conception, he couldn’t condone that,
didn’t believe in that. But it was his sister, his beautiful gentle fragile sister, and the
thing inside her, it would kill her, take her away from him as sure as murder.
“Mackenzie - ”
“You would have made me see it was the only way… I couldn’t let you do that…
Jen… I couldn’t.”
“Who is the father? Why didn’t I know you were seeing someone?”
New tears collected in her eyes, sparking, the green of them as deep as a forest, and
she shook her head, couldn’t form the words that would break her brother’s heart.
Jensen looked at the tears, fear sudden in his heart, “Mac, tell me, who is the father?
Who did this to you?”
Mac lifted her head, “please Jen… don’t make me tell you, I’m not ready to tell you,
please…” her voice broke, sobs from her that caused her to hunch, one hand on her
belly, the other on her heart, where Jensen knew the scars were hidden under the
thin summer dress. Panic rose in him, he knew she was well, but for so many years,
for so long, he was the brother, the father figure, the one that she always ran to, the
one that held her hand as she slept after her last surgery. He couldn’t do this to her.
What would it achieve? Forcing her to face who the father was… it wasn’t going to
solve the problem.
She started to rock, “I can’t… I can’t,” she whispered in between sobs, lifting her
head and closing her eyes to hide the view of the grief she could see in her brother’s
green eyes. “Please don’t make me, I cant…”
She was the four year old in a hospital bed, she was the ten year old sobbing
because she couldn’t go to normal school with her brothers, and she was the
fourteen year old who was told she would never carry a baby to term. She was his
beautiful baby sister and Jensen could deny her nothing. Leaning up he pulled her
into a hug, rubbing soothing strokes on her back, his words slow and careful, “its ok,
shhhh, we’ll do this… together… we’ll do this… it will be fine… shhhhh.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++
It was two hours and forty-three minutes since Jensen had left, Jared looking at the
clock, lost in thought, his fingers curling at the corner of a map, his head spinning
with what he had done. There was no knock on the door; just JD suddenly standing
next to him, his hands in his pockets and a concerned look on his face.
“How did it go?” The older man asked and frowned, concerned as his young friend
slumped in his chair, curling six four of muscle into a dejected slump.
“I’m guessing he didn’t agree?”
Jared was silent, his head down, not wanting to look JD in the eyes, guilt eating away
at his insides. “Not at first, but I think maybe he will,” he finally said, wincing as he
heard JD sigh, knowing what was coming next.
“You used it, didn’t you?” JD had anger in his voice, anger and a very present
disappointment, “Jared, for God’s sake, you said you wouldn’t go that far, I
thought…”
Jared looked up, and JD could see it in his eyes, the angry hurt son, warring with the
grown man that JD knew was inside him. He sighed inwardly, pushing back the
disappointment that he was feeling at what Jared had promised he wouldn’t do. He
knew more than most what kind of man Jared was, more than his god damn daddy
did, more than his pissant brother did, more than his momma ever would. He knew
Jared was a good man, a hard worker, that he had done brilliant work at TexOil. He
also saw the man whose daddy used the whole break them then make them attitude
to life. Watched at Padalecki senior dragged his sons down, destroying their selfrespect and then began to rebuild them in his own image. He looked at Jared and
saw a man that used women as playthings, who couldn’t keep a relationship if he
tried, a man whose used his endless pit of money to hide the fact that, at the end of
the day, Jared Tristan Padalecki was just lonely. And now, JD could see that Jared’s
anger, a product of his daddy’s training, taking over. Could see that the hatred and
frustration of being pushed aside, the fear of losing the one thing that defined him as
a person, was winning.
“I had to,” Jared said firmly, “I had to use it, he was going to walk.”
JD moved closer, “You know Chad is never going to forgive you,”
Jared lifted troubled eyes, he knew Chad was going to disown him, if he ever found
out it was Jared who had told Mac’s brother what Mac had confided in Chad. He
snorted, what did he mean if, that was where Ackles was now, checking on his sister,
asking her if it was true, finding out she had kept secrets from him.
Chad had needed a friend, had talked to Jared in confidence. Mac is pregnant and I
am so scared for her, what do I do?, he had said, a hand over his own heart where
he wore matching scars to Macs, a victim of the same fragile pulse as Mac herself.
Jared had been drunk, another night where his failures chased him to drink, but he
had held Chad’s words in his head, looking over at the middle Ackles leaning at the
bar with his boyfriend of the day. Shit, if Ackles ever found out she wasn’t telling him,
he would lose it. He had felt sorry for Ackles that night, given a shoulder for Chad,
said all the right things, and then forgotten it all as he fucked the blond girl in the
storeroom up against paper towels and bleach until she screamed his name and he
lost it with his face buried in her neck. Chad had been hurt that night, had needed a
friend, and instead had got something-to-prove-Jared instead. Jared apologised the
next day, they hugged, still, nothing more was said, not until he had blurted it out to
Jensen today, with no remorse, but with singular purpose. To get him to agree.
JD touched the boy he looked on as a son, on the shoulder, “I hope it was worth it…”
Jared’s secretary’s voice echoed in the silent room, “Mr Padalecki, I know you said
no calls, but I have Jensen Ackles on line three.” Jared said nothing, his teeth
worrying his lower lip as he lifted the receiver and took the call.
“D ranch, now, bring the contract,” was how Ackles started, and then he added
almost too quietly to hear, “I have terms.”
++++++++++++++++++++++
D Ranch, actually the Double D ranch, named for Derek and his then new daughter
Donna, was a sprawling horse ranch with a growing reputation for specializing in the
breeding, training, and cutting of Quarter and Paint horses. Nothing of the ranch was
due to Alan Ackles; it was all down to his children. Everyone knew about Ackles
senior, Alan, the man who seemed to think the world owed him a living, a drunk who
died young; wrapped around a telegraph pole in his low-slung sports car only months
before his liver would have killed him anyway. He had schemes and dreams, carrying
his family along from one money making idea, to another, inevitably losing all of the
Ackles money from early oil days through a combination of gambling and shady
deals. Everything except for the ranch.
When Donna and Alan had met, Alan still at that time working with Gerald, it had
been love at first sight, and despite a minor fling with Gerald, it had been Alan that
Donna had married, Josh arriving not much later, born with his mother’s green eyes,
and his dad’s easy smile. Alan may well have won the woman, but it was Gerald who
somehow held on to the oil, and resentment had grown in Gerald as fast as weeds
grew in the fertile soil of his wife’s land. Still he couldn’t touch the ranch for money,
couldn’t gamble it away or sell it; it was in Donna’s name, left to her by her doting
father, some 800 acres of pasture and good Texan soil. Josh had no interest, worked
with Jensen when he could, but his calling was law, which he practiced the next town
over, a lot of it for no money, for families like themselves who needed legal help but
didn’t have the money to pay. Then Jensen had arrived, the calm level headed
middle child, who loved the land and thrived with the horses, content to sit for hours
under the Texan sun with his animals and the dust on his clothes. Then finally there
was Mac. Mac who had been born prematurely, a late baby from a dying marriage,
born with a congenital cardiovascular defect that dictated her life would be hard.
When Gerald died he left more than three children and a wife, he left death taxes and
debts that no family could hope to live with. Even with structured repayment the
Ackles couldn’t begin to clear the debt and even selling land couldn’t help, and only
now, fifteen years after Alan’s death could they see the light at the end of the tunnel,
only another five years, maybe four, if Solo-Col foaled and Jensen could sell the foal
for prime money. Donna had grown quieter, less of the outgoing momma that Jensen
remembered from childhood, worn down by the worries of everything, involved in
every decision, despite how much Jensen wanted to protect her. She cried a lot,
hiding her tears and the grey round her eyes with makeup, her hair drawn back off of
her face in a fall of blonde, still the striking woman she had been when she was
runner-up to Miss Texas so many years before. She cried for her daughter and the
pain she had been in, she cried for Josh as he struggled with his conscience to bring
help to families who needed it, and she cried for Jensen. Her youngest son, old
before his time, sometimes so world weary and working so damn hard. She saw him
go out a few times, so tall, and handsome, wanting him to find someone, anyone who
could break him from the cycle of work, and sighing as every night he returned to his
own bed. Every night.
She didn’t blame Alan. She didn’t blame Gerald. She had never passed on the hatred
Alan had for his for business partner to her children, but she guessed that they had
heard enough to form their own opinions. Which is why as Jensen stood waiting for
Jared to arrive, it was with a growing resentment that once again it seemed an
Ackles was looking to a Padalecki for money.
Jared coming to the D ranch was akin to the enemy at the gate, the Ackles and the
Padaleckis certainly not the greatest of friends. No one actually knew what had
happened all those years before, as Donna and Alan married, and Gerald struck oil
on his own, but the bitterness, the anger, that Gerald and Alan carried had filtered to
Jeff Padalecki, was being carried on with all the deliciousness of enmity that Jeff
seemed to enjoy as much as Jared’s father. Jared didn’t hold the old grudges,
couldn’t really see why he should, it had all happened long ago, it was nothing for
him to worry about. Still if he could use this against his dad… then that was a good
thing… however he managed it.
As Jared’s low car bumped and ground over potholed road he cursed that he didn’t
think to drive one of his off-roaders instead, his eyes wide at the damage he was
surely doing to the red sports car as each hole shook the frame. He felt like a fish out
of water, his car bumping over broken roads, seeing the rough edges of this growing
horse operation, wondering at the buyers who had to traverse the way to get to their
horseflesh without damaging their cars.
He finally reached the ranch, a modest two-story spread that was L shaped and
curved around a dusty dry courtyard where several beaten vehicles stood their
ground. He switched off the engine, climbing out of the car and looking around
himself with a cautious eye. He could see disuse and disrepair, the house itself tired
and worn, but the windows bright and clean, could see the road behind him pitted
and stoned, but saw fencing for the horses pristine and white, the barns to one side
looked old, but the corral for the training neat, clear, fresh. It was such a contrast and
he could see that the Ackles money was being ploughed into the horses. It smelt of
hard work and cut grass, of Texan heat and bravery, it was like Jensen. Just like
Jensen.
Jensen watched as the sports car drew up in front of the main house from the kitchen
window a bottle of beer in his fingers, his eyes narrowed as he saw the tall man leave
the car and stare unabashed at the ranch about him. Jensen knew what he saw,
disrepair, lack of funds, miles of untended land, and he could almost sense
Padalecki’s contempt from here. He knew what the Padalecki spread was like, had
seen photos, the mansion, for want of another word, spread low and white in acres of
land, knew what he had here was nothing compared to that.
Jensen steeled himself. The Jensen that Padalecki was meeting now was the Jensen
he was going to have to live with and this Jensen… well this Jensen was not gonna
make it easy.
If he was going down, was going to do this thing, it was going to be on his terms. He
was sick of the Ackles women being played like pawns in these little Padalecki power
trips, first his mom, who he had held as she cried her tears of loss, and now his
sister.
He blinked as Jared turned to face the house. That was one piece of prime Texas
flesh, and if he wasn’t… if he hadn’t… Jensen sighed, pulling himself together, Jared
Padalecki may be gorgeous, may be physically everything Jensen looked for in a
man normally, but all that was at the centre of him was a black, dead, heart,
Jensen may be agreeing to this, for his sister, but if Jared was expecting Jensen to
bend over and give him an easy ride then he was surely mistaken. It was time a
Padalecki learnt exactly what an Ackles was made of.
The lesson started here.
Chapter 4
Jensen opened the main door, looming large into the day from the cool interior of the
ranch, “Padalecki,” he said simply, hesitating momentarily and then finally moving to
one side to let the tall man into his house.
“Jensen,” Jared replied, nodding, his eyes intent on discerning Jensen’s facial
expression and his body language. He sighed inwardly; if he wasn’t mistaken it was a
very different man who stood in front of him now than the one who left his office
those few hours earlier. This man seemed rigid, angry, focused, someone who was
not going to roll over without a fight, and as he followed him to the large airy kitchen
he could see iron in his spine, in the way he held himself. Jensen stopped, holding
out his hand for the papers in the folder Jared had, and Jared handed them over
without a word.
“There’s coffee, stay here.” Jensen said, his southern hospitality forcing it’s way
through his icy demeanour, and Jared simply nodded and moved to the counter,
years of scratches and ridges under his soft fingers, his back to Jensen. He didn’t
hear Jensen leave, but when he turned to face the man he was no longer there and
Jared sighed.
Jensen for his part was sat in the sunroom, staring at the pages in his hand, twelve
carefully drawn forthwiths and herewiths, all pages in a different language. He just
knew it was a bargain to get what he wanted. Money. It was the schedule attached
that was the interesting part, simple sentences, like someone else, not a lawyer, had
written them, perhaps even Jared?
The schedule was entitled ‘Jared Tristan Padalecki and __________________;
clauses’ and he had to smile that whoever had prepared the draft contract had left
the space clear. Jensen guessed Jared had a list of people that he was going to ask,
for whatever reason he needed a husband, he wondered how far down the list he
had been and what hold Jared may have had over other possibilities. He scanned the
list of clauses, most of it seemed straightforward.
No partner shall give cause to make other people think that the marriage was not
entered into for anything other than love; Both parties to act like a married couple in
public; New partner entering into marriage to have no sexual or physical encounters
outside of this marriage; Partner to reside at the Padalecki home; Partner to attend
all functions where needed, suitably attired and with reference to previous clauses on
appropriate behaviour; Partner to change surname to Padalecki; Partner to sign a
pre-nuptial contract as stated in main contract.
In return, there was a ‘non-specified at this time’ financial settlement on this new
partner, and space for details. Jensen wondered what it would finally say, and there
was a sudden sorrow, tight and constricting in his chest, and he imagined the words
there, a promise to save his sister, to give the Ackles family a chance to stay whole.
He stood, stretching tall, the paper creased in his hands and drawing in a deep
breath he went back into the kitchen, his own terms and clauses in his head.
”For a start,” he began, startling Jared who was staring out of the kitchen window his
hands around a coffee mug and his head tilted to one side, “It will be AcklesPadalecki, not just Padalecki.”
Jared made to speak, his stubborn streak trying to push through. This wasn’t a real
marriage where names were joined to signify union; this was merely a business
transaction, why did Jensen demand that Jared amend his family name, why would
that be one of his terms? Jensen didn’t move, his eyes flint hard, and Jared knew at
that moment that it was a small battle he could afford to lose. “OK,” he finally said
simply, he had bigger battles ahead.
“OK, the money for Mac’s care is signed over in trust so there is no backing out, it is
set up so that Mac doesn’t find out where the money is coming from. In addition to
this no one, and I mean no one, ever finds out about the contract or its implications
for the year. There will be no big wedding, a quick wedding in Canada and back,
simple rings, quiet.” Jensen paused, so far so good. “I need an even six million for
the ranch, and you will at all times respect my work at the ranch. It is, and will remain,
my family’s legacy, the contract will be written so it is out of your reach. End of.”
Jared nodded, he didn’t want the ranch, I mean, who the fuck wanted a ranch
anyway? “Agreed,” he said.
“I will move to your home, I will stay there for the one year, on one proviso.”
“Which is?”
“In that time there will be occasions when I am needed here for days at a time on
ranch business, you will not give cause for me not to not be able to fulfil those
obligations.”
“Within reason.” Jared tossed out quickly, watching as Jensen bristled at the words.
“When we have foaling it could be three maybe four days, at that time you will come
here and live at the D with me.” Jensen added as an afterthought. He could almost
hear Jared’s brain working.
“Say again?” Jared’s voice dripped with disbelief as he cast a quick look around the
kitchen, and that there, that disbelief coupled with the wrinkle of Jared’s nose in
disgust was enough for Jensen’s temper to start to rise.
“Not only that,” he started, on a roll now, “but as part of this contract I want you
working on the ranch for exactly…” he paused, throwing together quick calculations
in his brain and then doubling the number, just because he could, “twenty four days
out of the 365 days of the contract.” Jared’s mouth definitely fell open… working… on
a farm… “It can be weekends, Sundays, I don’t imagine it will interfere in whatever
you do or don’t do at TexOil, but your working with me with add authenticity to the
whole shitfest. Agreed?”
Jared bit his tongue, twenty-four days? He nodded, it was all he could do, not trusting
himself to use actual words.
“So, a no sex outside the marriage rule for your new partner?”
“Of course, it needs to…” Jared paused, he wasn’t sure how to say this, “no, erm, for
you no… men…” Jared stumbled over the words, not really that sure of etiquette in
situations describing what Jensen had with other men.
“You too.” Jensen said simply, leaning back on the scarred wooden counter and
crossing his arms, a faint sense of satisfaction at hearing Jared so screwed at
placing the boundaries so firmly around his concept of gay sex. “‘Cos you know man,
if I believe everything I read, you get way more than me, and I am not gonna be
taking that in this convoluted idea of a marriage.”
“Taking it?”
“You dogging around on me behind my back. You will agree to abstain for the year
too, I wont be made to look a fool, especially when your hook-ups would be women,
which kinda goes against the whole gay marriage thing… so there will be no affairs,
nothing, agreed?”
“Nothing?” Jared sounded almost lost, his head spinning with all these rules, all the
‘what ifs’ and the ‘whys’ and the ‘no ways’.
“Nothing.”
Jared frowned. Was that a smirk on Jensen’s face? Did Jensen think he couldn’t go
for a year without getting himself off using nothing but his right hand? “OK.” Jared
watched as Jensen raised a single eyebrow. “Is that it?” Jared tried to sound bored,
hoping against hope that there were no more of these goddamn terms and
conditions.
“You know something Padalecki, you are as cold as freaking ice. Do you have no
emotion in you? You sign away your life like this, do you feel anything?”
Jared said nothing to that. That was a whole can of worms that he was far from ready
to open. Jensen just stared back at him, something in his eyes, but he couldn’t tell if it
was disappointment, sympathy or a combination of both. There was no way he could
begin to understand why Jared was doing this, no way in hell, and Jared was not
going to start explaining, after all he hardly knew Jensen to talk to, let alone share his
motivations in life with him.
“I am doing this for my sister,” Jensen added simply, getting back to what he had
really meant to say, “and for my family. They mean everything to me, I don’t give a
rats ass why you are doing this, but I swear if they ever find out…”
“I have just as many reasons for it to be a secret.” Jared stopped, Jensen arching his
back and covering a yawn, he had been up since four am, and this was pushing even
his levels of alertness. Jared found himself staring at the yawn, at the stretch, at the
pull of skin across muscles, wondering if he was ever going to get the bravery to
admit that he was maybe more bi-curios than Jensen would ever know.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It wasn’t too late. He could tear up the contract, he had lawyers, the deal had been
made under duress, and no court of law would uphold it surely. Still. Images of Mac
were at the front of his mind, tears on her pale cheeks and her hand protective on his
unborn niece. That pushed his feet to move those final few feet. He couldn’t even tell
her he was going, or what he was doing, but dammit he wanted too. As he held her
close for a hug last night, a reassuring, don’t worry it will be fine hug, the words to
describe what he was doing were on the tip of his tongue. Instead he took the
coward’s way out, leaving a message on her cell.
Don’t worry, I’ve just got a potential buyer and I’m going to havta schmooze, back
day after tomorrow… left Riley in charge of the stock… loveya’ Mac… look after
yourself…
Jensen put the cell in his pocket, hefting his back over his shoulder, and looking up at
the red TexOil logo that was emblazoned down the side of the jet sat silently to one
side of the airport. It figured Padalecki would have his own plane. Jensen seemed to
remember reading about it in some glossy spread about Dallas royalty. As he stood
at the bottom of the steps he realised the next footfall he took really would seal his
fate when he left the Texas he knew and entered the world of Jared Padalecki.
Steeling himself, he climbed the few steps and ducked his head to enter the cool
interior, out of the mild Texas evening, stopping on the threshold as images
assaulted his senses. Luxury. Leather. Carpet. Glass. Someone standing to take his
carry on and usher him to a seating area, complete with large flat screen television
and PS3. Jared slid into his seat, and Jensen noticed the TexOil logo embroidered
on everything from belts to seats.
This was the first time that they had seen each other since the meeting two days
before, paperwork exchanged by courier, no phone calls, just one text with simple
instructions that Jensen should make his way to the out of city airport, and that things
had been organised. It was a surprise to see Jared so casual, jeans and a black Tshirt, a worn dark leather jacket across his broad shoulders and his hair looser
around his face. He welcomed Jensen aboard with a half smile, and to Jensen’s eyes
he looked nervous, mostly tired but also nervous, pacing and restless.
They didn’t talk, not until the jet was in the air and heading north.
“You can shower, freshen up, and take some time…” Jared offered hesitantly,
indicating two doors that separated the area they sat in.
“Shower.”
“You brought the suit?”
“I brought the suit.”
It was funny how the grand total of eighteen words lasted the whole seven hours in
the air. Or maybe not funny at all. The flight to Canada was long enough, each man
lost in thought for one reason or another, Jared uncomfortable with the silence.
He kept focusing on the whole sex thing, which was all that filled his head. He had
never even experimented with men, well apart from that whole time at the Christmas
dance with Luke Evans… admittedly under the influence of alcohol… but that was
nothing, had meant nothing, just a hurried hand job against the outside of the gym, a
fumble touch between horny teenagers. He didn’t have an issue with the whole gay
thing; his daddy may well do, but he had hung around Chad long enough to
appreciate what Chad found so attractive in a man. You’d never have to worry about
your height Jay, or your muscles, or your strength, you find someone strong like you
and you just fucking go for it…
The differences between men and women were never more obvious than on Jensen
freaking Ackles, naturally muscled from his work, Jared assumed, hard muscles that
buches and released when he moved to do even the smallest of things. Jared could
see why men would want Jensen, wondered if Chad had been there… wondered
what other men had been there… Added to that Jensen had the clearest deepest
forest eyes, and the tightest ass and those kiss me right the fuck now lips. The lips
that Jensen was biting on as he closed his eyes and laid his head back with his IPod
buds in his ears.
Jared just stared, unable to concentrate, the last two days slipping past his
contemplation of bitten lips, and what his brother had said to him this morning
spinning in his head.
He had avoided Jeff all week, especially now with the whole wedding thing filling his
waking hours, but today he had gone to the office, had memos to pass on, reports to
collate, never trusting the details of what he did to his secretary.
“Kristen wants you to stay at home on Saturday,” Jared looked up, it wasn’t often that
his brother even came to this floor let alone actually visit the map office itself.
“Saturday?” he blinked up at the only man he knew who was taller than him, slick
sharp in a grey suit, even at six-thirty on a Monday morning, the same gut churning
anger flying through him as it did every day he saw him since the whole meeting with
his dad.
“Alex’s birthday, he says he wants his Uncle Jared there.”
“I’ll be there,” he paused, climbing to his feet, brushing imaginary dust from his jeans,
“question is will you?” Jeff didn’t even begin to reply to that one, it was doubtful he
would be there, always had just the right excuse to be missing for one of Kristen’s
family parties.
“Why were you scrabbling on the floor?” He finally asked although he wasn’t
expecting a reply, simply laughed softly as Jared sent him a look of disgust. Jeff
knew Jared spread the maps on the floor, knew sitting cross legged gave the
younger man the chance to look at the land layouts and the geo data much easier. It
was a constant source of amusement to Jared’s older brother that he spent so much
time on the floor.
“Fuck you Jeff.”
”Whatever little brother, I have things to do, people to fire, deals to finish… later.”
Deals to finish, those single words, the deals that sat on Jeff’s desk, geo searches
and land advised purchases that Jared had sourced from research and work that
Jared had undertaken. All to be signed off by a man who, by virtue of being freakin’
married to the lush that was an ex Miss Texas, was now holding the majority in the
family firm. Bile rose in his throat as he sat back in the seat and closed his eyes, the
drone of the jet engine annoying, not able to even look at Jensen when he had these
self-destructive thoughts in his head.
Jensen was listening to music and thinking, quietly running through just what the hell
had happened that meant he was in this jet at this time. Jared had promised Jensen
this whole marriage business would be quick, already had the marriage license
sorted in British Columbia, one of the places in Canada that didn’t demand any kind
of residency, and Jensen was determined not to let this pass in a blur. He had never
considered marriage, his life choices kind of precluding it particularly in Texas, but he
always imagined, one day, that he would find a life partner. He wanted a life partner,
after the ranch was paid off, after his mom was happy, after Mac was well and safe…
just after.
Still it was difficult to remember it all, as they hurried from flight to rooms and back
again. Jensen remembered parts of the simple service, words he exchanged,
blinking down at the plain platinum band that sat on his ring finger, and up at Jared
who looked alternatively calm and then solemn and then just this side of panicked.
Jensen didn’t have time to wonder what the emotions meant as they passed over his
new husbands face, as the taller man bent his head to place a chaste kiss on his lips
then moved to pose for photos. Jensen knew he probably looked shell-shocked in the
photos, hoping that his acting the part was giving the photos enough authenticity that
he was keeping up his end of the contract. It seemed all the way through the car
journey, the service, and the photos, all Jared was capable of doing was providing a
running commentary on the shit weather, the shit photographer, the shit venue… you
name it Jared had a problem with it, and very soon any goodwill Jensen may have
been harbouring was long gone. He resorted to forcing a smile for the pictures and
digging his fingers hard into Jared’s side as he could whilst posing, just to let him
know he was there. If Jared felt the touch he didn’t show it, pushing back equally as
hard as he wrapped an arm around Jensen for the photos. When the photos were
finished Jared handed over money, they signed what they needed to sign, took
compliments when given and left as soon as they could.
All too soon they were back on the plane, Jared attaching the camera to a laptop and
downloading the twenty or so shots of their wedding as they sat waiting for clearance
to take off. He turned the laptop to Jensen as Jensen sat opposite and pulled the belt
across his lap, loosening his tie and sighing. He scanned the pictures, some of them
actually even looked like wedding photos, smiling, posing, and if he didn’t say so
himself, despite the almost childish anger that he had felt at the time, they looked
good together.
“The whole marriage thing was like this huge joke,” Jensen pointed out simply, “and
we’re fucked if anyone actually sees the photos.”
“Well they do need to be seen, we need to select the best ones, it needs to be
irrefutable that we married for love and for no other reason. Agreed?” Jared was brisk
and to the point, his eyes narrowing, turning the laptop back and proceeding to delete
at least fifty percent of the rushed photos, muttering under his breath, “Jesus, would it
hurt to have cracked a smile in these Ackles…”
“Tell me what there was to smile about?” Jensen instantly replied. He wanted to say I
said I’d marry you and I did. I am marrying you solely for money, for some strange
reasons on your side I will never understand. And to top it all its likely I am the only
sad bastard that would have said yes to you after you blackmailed me with my own
sister. I would be smiling why? But he didn’t, knowing what he had signed, agreeing
to the pretence, knowing it was for Mac and the ranch and for his family.
“The photos just don’t look real,” Jared worried his lower lip with his teeth, scrolling
through the photos, sighing and opening his email.
“Then maybe you shoulda got married for real,” Jensen pointed out simply, “or
mebbe used some of your fucking money and hired a freaking better photographer,”
Jensen snapped back, “instead of using a shit camera and that Britney wannabee
who was hanging around us.” Jared looked taken aback at the snarky comeback, his
lips tight and his fingers flexing on the edges of the laptop. Counting to five he
swallowed the instant anger at the way Jensen was talking to him, no one talked to
him like that, especially not impoverished cowboys, that he now owned, lock stock
and barrel.
“We’re both tired,” he began patiently, almost like he was talking to a small child that
needed a nap, “it’s been a long day. When we get in the air you should go an’ get
another shower or something, mebbe calm down.”
“Excuse me?” Jensen was deceptively quiet, his finger hovering over the closed belt,
just needing the excuse to slap this guy down after his day from hell.
Jared frowned at him. Didn’t Jensen understand what he had just said? “I just said -”
“I heard what you said. I’ll have a shower when I want one, not when I’m told to.” jeez
could he sound less like a man in his thirties than a fourteen year old girl.
“No one is going to believe we are married for real if you keep bitching back at me
like some kind of…”
“Some kind of what? Husband?” Score one for Jensen.
“Look, Ackles - ” Jared started
“That’s Ackles-Padalecki,” Jensen snapped, anger flashing in hazel green eyes, “at
least get that in your head, cos if I am doing this, then you had better be the fuck
behind it.”
“I wont forget the name again, I have as much to lose as you do if this looks to be
going south,” Jared said simply, suddenly very tired of this whole mess and
wondering just what the fuck he had been thinking.
“What? What do you stand to lose?”
“My share of that which is rightfully mine.” my one chance to make something of
myself… at TexOil… away from TexOil… maybe…
“Money,” Jensen’s voice dripped with sarcasm and derision, his eyes narrowed,
dismissing the reason instantly and out of hand. Jared looked at him steadily, he
wanted to deny that it was money, wanted to suddenly tell this man exactly why he
wanted the marriage, what his real reasons were.
Still, when he opened his mouth to say more, to let the words out, the family, the
rivalry, his upbringing, his self esteem, nothing came out, nothing that meant
anything anyway. “Yes, money,” he said simply. After all, what kind of person could
ever understand what was in Jared’s head when he couldn’t even begin to
understand it himself; there was no point in even going there.
Well this made for a great start.
Chapter 5
The plane landed after lunch, the Texas sun hot and welcoming after the frigid
Vancouver air.
“What now?” Jensen said carefully, his nerves on edge, the start of a headache
behind his eyes.
“I emailed the photo and the report on the wedding to the Times.” Jared replied
quickly, knowing he should maybe have told his new husband that small fact.
“You did what?” Temper rose in Jensen quicker than the sun heated the back of his
neck and Jared backed away his hands up, placating, feeling just a small bit nervous
of the shorter man with anger in his eyes.
“We need to announce it somehow, I just did it anonymously.”
“My family doesn’t even know,” panic laced Jensen’s voice, “I wouldn’t not tell my
freakin’ family you idiot. They are gonna see…” he had no words for the stupidity that
was Jared freakin’ Padalecki.
Biting his tongue he climbed into the air-conditioned car, the chauffer in the front
turning the key to start the engine, and listening as Jensen spat out instructions to
the ranch. He looked out at Jared expectantly, seeing him standing without moving,
bags at his feet, his expression thoughtful, twisting his ring with the fingers of his
other hand.
“Yours first, then mine,” he finally and simply said and Jensen nodded, eager to be
doing something.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Momma, you know Jared.” Jensen had planned and practiced the whole way home,
mom I’m married. Mom I fell in love. Mom I am trying to save Mackenzie. Mom Mac
is pregnant. Nothing worked in his head. Nothing.
“Jared,” she said smiling prettily, her hands covered in flour, cake mix sitting in a
porcelain bowl and Jensen’s heart swelled with pride. His mom was so beautiful, so
quiet, and serene and he was so proud of her. She would understand what he had
done, he only had to tell her. Tell her what he had agreed for sake of the family.
“I have something to tell you,” he said softly.
“What darlin?”
“I’m married momma, I met Jared a while back, we didn’t tell anyone because…
momma… before I knew it I was married.”
Silence.
Jensen reached for Jared’s hand and she watched as Jared looked down at Jensen,
with something in his eyes, something akin to affection, and she knew. She closed
her eyes, tears spilling from them, her hands clasped, a soft sigh leaving her parted
lips. “Jensen what did you do?”
“Momma…”
”Tell me…” her voice caught and she swallowed, “tell me you married for love…”
Jensen leaned into Jared, who rested a hand on Jensen’s hip in a small gesture of
support, “I married for love momma.”
Donna was still crying, but this time there was a peace on her face, now was not the
time to talk to Jensen, to find out the real reason why. And she pulled both boys in for
a hug, flour on their shirts, the smell of baking in the room, “welcome to the family
Jared.”
They stood there for a bit, Jared unsure where to put his hands, wanting nothing
more than to just stay in the warmth of Donna’s arms, until Jensen broke the silence.
“Where is Mac mom?”
“In the sun room, sweetie, she’s tired… looks very tired.” She pursued her lips, worry
creasing her brow and she turned back to her baking.
“Should we not disturb her?” Jared asked softly, seeing the matching worry on
Jensen’s face.
“No, I need her to see… I need you to see her…”
They moved into what was euphemistically called the sunroom… a brick built
extension to the main ranch house, spilling with hothouse flowers and the smell of
Texas heat.
Jensen crouched down next to a dozing Mac, tugging at her hands into his own, and
Jared watched like he would watch a road accident, with morbid anticipation and a
healthy dose of fear.
She blinked awake, her eyes red, had she been crying?
“Jen?” her voice was drawling tired, as she clasped a hand to his, “did it go OK?”
“Hey Mac, I need to talk to you… you OK to talk?” Jensen waited for her to nod and
then just jumped in with what needed to be said, “I lied to you baby,” Jensen said
softly, watching as her expressive eyes widened and questions appeared in her
eyes. “I wasn’t on a business trip, I was away with my boyfriend,” he added, and her
questions turned to a small smile, as she looked up and past her brother to the man
stood behind. Jensen had never seen her pale so quickly.
“Your…” her voice tailed off. That was Padalecki, Jared Padalecki... Jeff’s… Chad’s
friend…
“Jared was… my boyfriend… we have been seeing each other quietly for a while
now.”
“Jared?” She said wonderingly, looking back at her brother’s face, seeing no joke
there, only open honesty. “Was your boyfriend?” What did Jensen mean was?
“He’s my husband now,” Jensen said, like ripping a plaster off of a wound it was the
only way, just get it out there, in the open.
“Jensen?”
“We were in Canada, we married.” Jensen’s voice was so soft, so low, and he winced
as her fingers tightened on his and she pulled herself to stand. She wasn’t a small
women, standing five foot nine in stocking feet, her head near to the height of
Jensen’s shoulder and leaning away from her brother’s touch she faced Jared, her
back straight and her face carefully blank of emotion.
“Are you your daddy’s boy?” she asked plainly, easing further away as Jensen
reached for her, both men knew what she meant, and Jensen sent a pleading look to
his new husband, for gods sake lie to her.
Jared inclined his head, moving a step closer, looming large over the exhausted
woman child in front of him, feelings he couldn’t identify churning inside him. Stunned
that this small, pregnant, ill, woman was standing up to him to ask him a question
even he didn’t know the answer to. “No ma’am,” he finally said, “I am not my daddy’s
boy… I am my own man.” She closed her eyes briefly, and nodded almost
imperceptibly, it seemed that Jared had said the right thing.
“How long have you been seein’ each other?” she asked, “and momma and Josh…
do they know?”
“About two months,” Jared said smoothly, his hand again reaching for Jensen. They
had talked about this in the car on the way over. Jensen hadn’t been in a relationship
for nearly six months, and Jared’s flings could maybe be written off as cover ups if
really questioned, really pushed.
“This is quick,” she commented, moving back to the chair and sitting down, a small
sigh leaving her body.
”Momma knows, we just told her, and Josh is next.”
”He’ll not take it well, there is little respect there that he has for the Padaleckis.”
Jensen felt Jared stiffen beside him, his hand hot entwined with Jensen’s his fingers
flexing.
“He holds nothing against them,” Jensen said calmly, although that was perhaps a
small exaggeration. Neither of the brothers hated the Padalecki name in the truest
sense of the word, just hated what had happened to their dad and how he had let the
prominent Texas family name destroy their own name.
“It wont be easy,” she said simply, nodding, “but for what it is worth Jared Padalecki, I
love my brother, and I love Josh, and the men that they are… they wont make your
life miserable for the sins of your father.” Jensen smiled, dropping Jared’s hand and
leaning down for a kiss from his sister.
“When did you get so wise Mackenzie Ackles?”
“About the same time you and Josh told me that the tooth fairy took teeth even if they
hadn’t fallen out Jensen Ross.” They smiled wider, Jensen touching fingers to
Mackenzie’s tummy, feeling the soft roundness of it and wanting to scoop her up and
protect her forever.
“I’m guessing we have stuff to do now,” he whispered low in her ear indicating her
belly, at the soft skin under his fingers.
Mac grimaced, “hospitals and stuff,” she replied just as softly, wrinkling her nose in
disgust.
“Tell me and I will take you,”
“I will, though Chad said he’s gonna come to every one with me.” She smiled that
secret smile only Jensen had ever seen, the affection she had for her friend Chad,
some ten years her senior, shining in her eyes. Jensen dropped a small kiss on his
sister’s nose and stood, stretching tall and instinctively reaching for Jared’s hand,
anything to keep the charade alive. They said their goodbyes, and after leaving with
another hug from his mom, he handed out the address for his older brother, knowing
that this was going to be the hard one.
Jared sat back in the car, massaging the hand that Jensen had held, shocked at how
natural it had seemed for Jensen to bask in the approval of his mom and sister,
wondering if his mom would even care, if his brother would have anything but
derision for what he had done and whether his dad would actually let him leave the
building alive when he revealed his latest life decision.
They must have something in common, this Jared and this Jensen. They both had
older brothers; Jensen must know what it felt like to be bullied and bossed around
and treated like the lesser man.
”So your brother? Is he a bit of a dick then?”
“Josh?” Jensen looked surprised at what Jared asked, had he heard something
somewhere? Jensen felt defensive, they had had their differences, but no, Josh and
he were close.
“Yeah, your sister said…” Jared’s voice trailed off.
“Oh… yeah… well he wont understand why I married you. You. A Padalecki.”
“Because?” stupid question but best to get it out there.
“Usual shit I guess, but no, Josh and I… and Mac… we are close… after our dad
died we got closer, Josh is married, two kids.”
”Same as Jeff.”
“His wife is Anna, and his kids, Logan and Lea, they are a good family.”
“He’s a lawyer right?” Jared remembered that, something JD said in their final
meeting for the contract, something about Josh having a fit when he read some of
the clauses.
Jensen smiled proudly, “yep, worked his way through college and law school, took to
public defence, doesn’t make a lot, but enough to support his family and do good with
his skills and his education, and Anna was his childhood sweetheart.”
”Aaah, the American dream,” Jared wasn’t aware of it but to Jensen he sounded so
cynical. “Two point four kids, the picket fence, the station wagon and the dog.” Jared
subsided into silence, watching the pastures of the D pass by until they reached the
main road and turned left, away from the D and away from the city.
It wasn’t a long journey, only ten minutes, but it was marked by rolling fields and the
occasional homestead, segueing into a single road in a town with three sets of traffic
lights and dust marking the buildings with age. The car took a sharp right out of town
and stopped at a cluster of buildings low on the ground, each distinctive in shape as
if a small child had mixed and matched Lego pieces into a colourful huddle. Jensen
jumped out of the car, and walked up to the last building, with the sign proclaiming
Ackles - Law, waiting until Jared caught him up and then he knocked and walked in.
Jensen paused; his brothers back was to him, the phone cradled between neck and
chin, a folder open in his hands. “OK, I have instruction that on this occasion we will
settle, but it is gonna be for the full amount… not if I have anything to say in the
matter… I don’t care how big they are… OK, my client will sign off on that… OK…”
he placed the phone and the folder on the table and sighed, pushing hands through
his hair, longer and blonder than his brothers, and Jared stood in anticipation at an
upcoming fight.
”Hey,” Jensen said firmly, his brother jumping and turning, hand flailing and smacking
Jensen on the arm.
“Jeez JR,” he spluttered blinking as he took in not only his brother, but also the tall
man behind him, Padalecki Junior, Jared. He frowned, looking at his brother
carefully. “What’s wrong?”
“I wanted to introduce you to someone,” Jensen started, and Josh looked past
Padalecki, but there was no one else here.
“I know him,” Josh said wonderingly, “we’ve met before.” What was going on?
Jared extended his hand, which Josh took with a firm grip. “Josh,” he said carefully.
“Padalecki,” Josh replied just as carefully, thoughtful, looking back at his brother who
stood close to Jared and then slipped a hand to grasp at Jared’s.
“Actually,” Jensen began, not really knowing another way of breaking this, “it’s
Ackles-Padalecki.”
Jared stood outside the door, where he had been asked to wait by a very calm, very
composed Josh, and then the shouting started. He tried not to listen, wanted to be
inside, where he should be, if only for appearances sake.
He’s not even gay for fuck's sake
Josh
Have you seen the papers, he’s got a different woman every freaking night
He’s bi Josh
And he’s settled on you, the son of his dad’s enemy
He hasn’t settled, we are in love
Love. You love him, Jesus J
What a gay man can’t fall in love?
Jen that is nothing to do with it, he’s a Padalecki for fucks sake, do you not
remember what it did to dad? Do you not remember some of the shit Gerald did to
mom?
Jared had heard enough, opening the door and seeing the two brothers in an angry
face off. “As I answered your sister Josh, I am not my father,” was all he said, waiting
until Josh visibly relaxed, “your brother and I… we are happy… we want to make this
work… do we have your support?”
Josh closed his eyes briefly, and then opened them and nodded, pulling his younger
brother in for a hug, “I’m happy if you are kid,” it had been a long time since Josh had
called him kid, and he curled his fingers into Josh’s shirt, wanting so much to tell him
everything, but stopping himself.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The ride back to the city was quiet, each man on his side of the car, Jensen lost in
the lies he was weaving, his heart heavy with that and the worry for his sister. Jared
was lost in thought as well, watching the city begin to build from his side of the car, a
shop here, a house there, until they hit the outskirts of Dallas. It was dark, the night
sky alive with the light from the skyscrapers which reached high on the horizon,
mirrored in the river, the magic of the city running with the blood in his veins. Jared
was not going to be telling his family today, every time he thought of the Ackles, and
how they had welcomed him into the family, with questions, but with acceptance
made his heart clench. Jensen was not going to be as lucky with his family, he knew
that, and despite the whole point of the marriage, despite wanting to rub his dad’s
face in what Gerald didn’t want for his middle child, he was reluctant to see them
tonight.
They passed the outside edge of the city, and after fifteen minutes were at the main
Padalecki house, home to Gerald and Sherry and their perfect kids, which seemed
quiet and dark. He doubted Jeff was at home, he never was. He assumed Kristen
was somewhere in the house probably under the influence given it was already 9pm,
and that the kids were with the nanny in the back wing. He knew his mom was out, it
was Foundation night, her bit for charity, where she could lord it over the other less
wealthy and enjoy her status. He knew where his dad was, Gerald was inevitably
away with his current affair du jour, everyone knew, his mom knew, but as long as
she had the name and the prestige and money that went with it, then he could do
what he wanted.
The car stopped at the side, the chauffer moving to open the door and lift out the two
bags, offering a wide smile which Jared didn’t return. He just nodded to dismiss him,
unable to form sentences, despite the fact that normally he would spend time to talk,
to ask about his daughter who had just left for college, but tonight… well tonight all
he wanted was to move inside, into this mausoleum he called home and shut his
door on the world. Jensen frowned, returning the chauffeurs smile and expressing
thanks, jeez, Jared really was a rude asshole.
He followed Jared in the side door, wide and opening into a boot room, immaculate
and tidy and nothing like the boot room at the ranch, in that there were no jackets, no
boots, no mud, nothing to show that anyone actually used the space. He said
nothing, just traced each footstep to a large hallway, crystal chandeliers hanging from
high ceilings and a marble staircase winding up from the entrance hall to the first
landing. It was icy perfection, spotless, no letters on the hall table, no bags laying at
the side and Jensen sighed inwardly, missing the casual warmth of his own home
against the hotel that this was.
Jared took the stairs three at a time, his long legs eating up the carved steps, Jensen
following at a more sedate pace, passing arranged fresh cut flowers placed just so on
a middle step, and turning left at the top, a long corridor ahead. Jared opened a door,
unmarked, simple, white, and gestured for Jensen to move inside, which he did,
dropping his bag on the floor, and standing, waiting… almost as if he needed
instructions. For his part Jared leaned back on the now closed door, tired eyed and
frowning, and Jensen looked around at the room about him. It was larger than the
entire floor he shared with his sister and mom, separated with carefully placed
furniture. There was a small library area, large red sofas and thick red curtains
framing floor to ceiling windows. Jensen couldn’t see anything outside apart from the
faint and distant glow of downtown Dallas, and it was unnerving that they would be
framed outside from the light in the bedroom if anyone cared to look. It was kinda
sparse as a living area, white, empty, probably cost a fortune for some decorator to
create.
“Imma guessing this is my home now?” Jensen finally said, his drawl more
pronounced as the last few days started to catch up with them. Jared nodded, waving
with his hand, master bedroom, adjoining bathroom, separate extra bathroom,
second bedroom, TV room, this room and that is it.” He thought he had summarised
it quite well, frowning at the thoughtful look on Jensen’s face. “What?”
”Which one is the guest room?”
”That one,” Jared indicated a door to the back of the large room, but stopped Jensen
with a hand on his arm as he started to walk that way, “both in the master,” he said
simply and Jensen opened his mouth to argue, noticing the stubborn set of Jared’s
mouth and sighing inwardly, well it was worth a try.
“Show me,” he finally said, hanging back as Jared opened the door to what he called
the master bedroom, leaning on the doorframe and waiting as Jensen moved past.
Jensen smirked to himself, as he brushed past, maybe a little too close, his thigh
touching hard and muscled against Jared’s leg, his voice low and growling as he
near whispered the words he knew Jared had to be thinking whatever he tried to tell
himself.
“How are we gonna cope being in the same bed with no sex for a whole year?”
Chapter 6
When Jared had announced, that no, they wouldn’t be having separate rooms, let
alone beds, he had seen the different emotions moving across his new husband’s
face. He saw amusement, acceptance, but no anger, “I’m guessing you have maids
‘n shit that would notice if we were sleeping separately?” Jensen had drawled as
Jared started to explain.
“Yeah,” Jared replied softly.
Jensen looked from bed to Jared and back again, that same smile, infuriating,
quirking his lips to one side, “it’s a big bed,” he pointed out, “no biggie.”
“So the whole, how are gonna manage for a year, what was that?” Jared snarked, his
hands on his hips and his eyes narrowed, looking for the entire world like a
disrespected parent.
Jensen snorted, a laugh on his face, starting to pull his shirt off and his T-shirt over
his head, “shower this way?” he waved at the closed door from the bedroom to what
he assumed was the attached bathroom and walked over, throwing one last look
back at Jared, who stood, clearly dumbfounded but verging on cross. Jensen just
had to get in one more thing, “Tell you what though… y’all just keep to your side of
the bed het-boy, and I’ll see if I can keep myself from being carried away with lust
and mebbe try’n keep it in my pants.”
“I…” was all Jared could think up to say.
“Just fuckin’ with ya dude,” Jensen pulled the bathroom door shut behind him before
Jared could answer, leaning back on the cool wood and smiling at the look in Jared’s
eyes, at the horrified open mouthed denial on his lips. He wasn’t stupid, he had seen
Jared stare at him as he deliberately started to undress in front of the younger man,
making sure to flex every muscle he had and to stand just so. Something in his eyes
telling Jensen that perhaps, Jared wasn’t quite so vanilla in his sexual tastes as
maybe he had heard around the clubs and bars. There was definite heat in that
man’s eyes, definite confusion.
Well hell, he thought to himself, examining which dials he needed to turn in Jared’s
frankly awesome, walk in shower, this was gonna be a long year, he may as well
have fun.
Outside had Jared spent a good minute or so calming down, climbing into bed and
covering himself with the sheets, hearing Jensen come out of the bathroom, feeling
the dip in his bed as Jensen climbed in.
He wasn’t sure Jensen slept, and as it was he guessed he himself had only had an
hour at the most, watching the bedside clock move from hour to hour, minute-tominute, hearing Jensen’s even breaths in the darkness of the room. His head was
spinning, with images of Jensen’s momma, with her quiet grace and her easy
acceptance of what Jensen had done, despite seeing concern in her green eyes so
like her sons. Josh and the argument he had overheard between the two brothers,
assuming Josh would demand and rant and state exactly what Jensen could or
couldn’t do, the same as Jeff would do to Jared. It shocked him that Josh pulled
Jensen in for a hug, called him kid, affection falling from his lips as easy as the
shouting only thirty seconds before.
He thought back to the way Mac had questioned him, all spit and fire as she stood
between him and her brother, so slight a stiff wind would probably blow her over, are
you your daddy’s boy? Her question was like a stab in the heart, because, at the end
of the day, yes he was, he was just like his dad, and one day blood would tell. He
had looked into Mac’s eyes and lied, and it made him feel lower than a snake, faced
with this pregnant girl, with such a huge battle in front of her. And as for Jensen ever
finding out that Jared had put money in place for Mac’s care even before Jensen had
said yes, then his proud husband was likely to kill him. Another secret he needed to
keep, another worry niggling inside his head.
And now, as the alarm clock moved round to six thirty am and Jared moved to place
his feet flat on the floor he wished for more sleep to deal with what he knew he had to
face today. Silently he padded to the window, the day new and fresh, sprinklers on
manicured lawns bordered by white fencing. There were several 4x4s around the
circular walled fountain, among them his, dark, black, the only one pointing away
from the house and down the avenue approach.
“Jared?” Jensen’s voice was tired, thick with sleep and Texas drawl, “s’time?”
Jared turned to face his husband of less that twenty four hours, watching him as he
rolled on his back and stretched warm limbs against dark red sheets, yawning, and
rubbing a hand along his stubble rough jaw. “Early,” he simply replied to the question,
causing Jensen to groan into the soft pillows, pushing at the restricting covers and
bending one leg at the knee.
“So how is today panning out?” Jensen asked, unspoken the words who do we have
to fool?. Jared grimaced as he watched out of the window, as his dad and Jeff climb
into a limo that had swung gracefully to the front door, and followed it with his eyes
as it headed down the avenue. He sighed, but then thought that actually, just maybe,
breakfast would be easier without them.
“This morning, my mother and erm… maybe Kristen, that is Jeff’s wife… maybe
Megan, my sister. There’s kind of this breakfast thing we do, normally I’m down with
my dad and brother, but they just left.” Jared turned back to the window, tracing the
dust in the trail of the limo, his fingers unconsciously touching the glass. The knot of
tension in Jensen eased slightly, he knew Jeff as an acquaintance, had never
actually spent much time with him, but really he had no time for him at all, thought he
was an arrogant asshole. And as for Padalecki senior, well Gerald hated the name of
Ackles, had done since way before Jensen had been born, had basically treated his
mom like shit at the funeral for her husband. So yeah, no love lost there either.
Jensen couldn’t understand the whole we hate the Ackles crap, life was too freaking
hard and too freakin short.
“So tell me about them and where they stand on the we hate the Ackles scale.”
Jensen prompted gently, frowning, as Jared seemed to momentarily slump, before
pulling himself straight and turning back to Jensen.
“The hate Ackles scale?” he asked cautiously, but Jensen didn’t answer the
unspoken question, so he just went ahead with what he assumed Jensen meant.
“Well my mother is kind of…” he paused, looking Jensen direct in the eye, the man in
front of him had given him a year of his life, he deserved at least some kind of
honesty, “It’s not easy to describe her, I mean her family is old money, goes back
generations, she has what she likes to call breeding, and what I like to term as
snobbery. She’s difficult, and she wont like what I have done, has had me half
married off to various Texas debutantes over the years. She doesn’t ever mention
your family, leaves that to my father and Jeff who spend an awful lot of time
discussing you.” Jensen opened his mouth to ask the question why, why did Jared’s
dad and brother seem to have such a problem with the Ackles, the court case had
been so many years before?, but Jared stopped him with a raised hand.
“Kristen is Jeff’s wife, they have been married about ten years, and I have a nephew
and a niece, both of whom have a full time nanny, neither of the kids will be at
breakfast.” Jared added the last small bit on, with a small hint of disappointment in
his voice that Jensen honed in on immediately.
“That’s a shame, I’da like to have met them,” Jensen said simply, watching as Jared
frowned quickly at his words, then just continued.
“Then there is Megan,” Jared paused, “probably the only good thing my parents did, I
mean, she is a complete airhead, thinks shopping defines her life, but she has a big
heart. I kinda keep my eye on her when I can.” Jensen nodded; he knew first hand
what it was to worry for a little sister. The words Jared were using to describe his
sister, his niece, his nephew, with open affection, seemed somehow wrong, there
was even emotion in there. Jared used caring, and shrewd, observations about his
own family that Jensen found intriguing. Still that didn’t mean Jared’s heart wasn’t
dead inside him. What man, with a sister of his own, would use Mac’s health as a
bargaining chip in a fake marriage?
Jared used the shower first, taking clothes into the large bathroom and exiting fifteen
minutes later in similar clothes as he had on the flight; dark jean and dark shirt, his
hair damp and pushed off of his face, his cheekbones angular and his slanted cat
eyes an intriguing combination of greens and browns. “All yours,” he said, crossing to
a large walk in closet and pulling out a black leather belt, watching out of the corner
of his eye as Jensen moved into the bathroom and shut the door, only then releasing
the breath he had been holding.
The tension across Jared’s shoulders and up the back of his neck was incredible,
tight and painful and he moved his head from side to side trying to release the
pressure. This always happened, whenever he brought someone to his family, friend
or lover, this is always how he ended up, stressed and tense, and he threw a prayer
to the heavens that his dad and brother would remain absent. He had been promised
that the article on the marriage would appear today in the gossip column, alongside
the best picture they had taken at the ceremony. He had organised this marriage as
a kick in the face to his dad, relished the moment his dad found out that Jared had
played him at his own game, but that didn’t stop the actual fear he felt at his own
father’s reaction.
The bathroom door opened and Jensen walked out, a drift of steam behind him, his
back, shoulders and chest sheened with water droplets and his lower half wrapped in
a towel. Casting one look at Jared he moved the towel to dry his chest, covering
nothing, and rummaged in his bags for boxers and his clean jeans. Jared couldn’t not
look, it was impossible to pull his eyes away, and he just stared as Jensen pulled on
the boxers and then the jeans, turning to face Jared with the jeans unsnapped and
the dark blue cotton of his underwear clear against the open fly.
”See something you like het-boy?” he enquired, quirking an eyebrow and tilting his
head to one side.
“Fuck you,” was all Jared could come up with in the moment, and balling up a sweat
shirt he threw it at Jensen who caught it with ease and unrolled it, looking down at
the Dallas Cowboys logo, worn and split after many washes. “Wear that,” he said,
“it’s my favourite shirt, and it will give our story more…” Jared waved his hand in a
gesture of whatever. Jensen pulled his lower lip between his teeth and held up the
sweatshirt, to inspect it closer. It was worn and warm and felt soft to touch, but it
looked freakin huge and he doubted even his manual labourer’s muscles were going
to fill the empty space. Still, Jared was right, it was touches like this one that would
help the story pass inspection, and so, steeling himself for the soft material to touch
still damp skin, he pulled it over his head.
Jared swallowed his tongue, this was getting stupid, he needed to get a handle on
this stupid lust ridden feelings that kept washing over him, freaking Ackles and his no
sex rule, it was going to kill him by a week Sunday. I am not gay, I am not gay, I am
not gay, I might be a small bit bi, I am not gay. The sweatshirt was long on Jensen,
long in the arms and hung way over his belt, but the age of it had thinned the material
to the point where it clung to Jensen’s form and it didn’t help that Jensen used his
large capable hands to smooth the material down over his flat stomach. I am not
gay… “Fucks sake Ackles, this isn’t a live sex show, lets get a move on.” Jared finally
snapped, waiting by the door, arms crossed over his chest, his foot tapping
impatiently.
Jensen didn’t even answer, just followed his new husband to the top of the stairs and
then held him back by his sleeve. Irritation had Jared turning sharply, Jensen
catching him on the turn and pulling him close, leaning up and guiding him in for a
kiss. “For appearances,” he whispered simply just as their lips met and Jensen
reached up to tangle a hand in damp hair, holding the squirming six five mass of
reluctance still and close. Finally Jensen released his hold and Jared pulled back so
slowly Jensen could feel his breath lingering on his warm skin.
Confidently Jensen took his hand, and moved to take the first step, “c’mon het-boy,
lets do this thing.”
The large breakfast room was empty save for one maid who was dishing hot cooked
food into servers and she said nothing, simply smiling softly and leaving as the two
men entered. Jensen dropped Jared’s hand and moved straight for the bacon and
sausage, his eyes widening at the mass of food available. He was used to a big
breakfast, his momma was always there with pancakes and bacon, eggs, sausage,
he had often been working a good solid three hours before he ate and he needed it.
But this… this obscene pile of food, this was kind of odd.
“I’m guessing y’all have big appetites?” he said laughing, pulling at a plate and piling
bacon and sausage and egg, before sitting at the table that was laid very prettily with
gilt edged crockery and sparkling silver cutlery. Jared wasn’t far behind, although his
plate had the added pancakes, and he also juggled over two glasses of orange juice.
The maid came back with fresh coffee and Jared virtually inhaled his breakfast
before Jensen was even half way through his, sitting back and sipping at the fragrant
coffee a look of bliss on his face. This was obviously relaxed Jared at his best and
Jensen sought to examine this rare species more closely, watching as suddenly
Jared stiffened and paled at a single word…
“Jared?”
Both men looked up. Jared’s mother. Perfect in dove grey and pearls, dark hair,
bottle brown Jensen thought, loose about slim shoulders, makeup perfect and a
cloud of Chanel announcing her presence. Jared stood, as did Jensen, and Jared
dropped a small kiss on smooth cheeks.
“Mother.”
“And Jensen Ackles is here because?” her voice was friendly in that false way that
means really she wasn’t that pleased to have Jensen at her breakfast table in the
morning at all.
”I have something to tell you,” Jared began, holding out his hand blindly, relieved as
Jensen caught it and moved closer to Jared, “yesterday I was married, Jensen is
my… this is my husband, Jensen Ackles-Padalecki.”
There was silence, sudden and all encompassing. “How perfectly ridiculous JT,” was
all she said, then added, with a good healthy portion of derision, “it is far too early for
this nonsense.” Jared couldn’t find the words and Jensen just stared. He had
expected a reaction from the matriarch of the Padalecki family, but dismissal hadn’t
been on his list of first options, having already settled on southern belle fainting or icy
anger.
“Ma’am,” Jensen started, “no nonsense, we married yesterday, in Vancouver.”
“I don’t know what is going on here,” she blinked at Jensen, her lips thin and pressed
hard together, a small twitch in her eye the only evidence that she felt anything, “this
joke is not funny JT.” Turning on her heel she left the room, the Chanel moving with
her, all the oxygen rushing back in to the space she had occupied and both Jensen
and Jared breathing deeply.
“That went well.” Jensen said wryly.
“It’s OK, she’ll speak to dad, or maybe Jeff, then she’ll come back and rail on me at a
later time that suits her.” Jared sounded unconcerned, like the icy calm that
surrounded his mother was perfectly OK. Jensen thought of his mom, of the passion
in her, the grace she had, that still remained even when she smacked Jensen round
the back of his head with a spoon. She would never have just left the room, they
would have argued, shouted, screamed, hugged, made up, sometimes all of this in
the space of five minutes. It was what defined Jensen’s life and the life of his siblings,
that passionate discussion that was the start and end of arguments, nothing lingering
or festering for days.
“Jared?” another voice, “I cant believe you took the jet, I needed it,” this must be
Megan, “Annabelle and I wanted to go to go shop in NY and… well hello gorgeous.”
Her voice changed as she pulled Jared in for a hug and saw Jensen standing beside
him, “where did you come from handsome?” Jensen winced. He was being hit on by
a girl the same age as his sister.
”Megan, meet Jensen, Jensen meet Megan, my annoying brat of a sister.”
“Helloooo Jenseeeenn,” she drawled, sliding her hand to touch his arm, only
dropping it when Jensen backed up quickly, knocking into the chair. She was tall, not
as tall as her brother, but at least five ten, and had hair that was long and straight
and about her shoulders with the colour of sunshine. She was gorgeous, even
Jensen could appreciate that, gorgeous and confident and very… very… young.
Jared snorted a laugh, ”Meg, seriously, back off, that is my husband you are coming
on too.”
If Megan was surprised she didn’t let on, her eyes carefully and coolly assessing her
brother and then Jensen, “that’s some statement there big brother. Wanna expand
for me?”
“Coffee?” Jensen asked, crossing to pour fresh coffee and sliding into the chair he
had just left, wanting to hear exactly how Jared was going to explain this to his
younger sibling.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Two men read identical reports that morning. One read it on-line, his usual habit
along side his morning coffee, said coffee splattering the screen at the headline,
Texas oil heir weds in gay marriage. The other read it in a newspaper, traditional, laid
out across his expanse of desk.
Jeffery Dean Morgan got the first phone call from Jeff at 8:56, the second from
Gerald at 9:02.
The shit had well and truly hit the fan.
By 9:20 Gerald Padalecki had left for home.
By 9:40 Jeff Padalecki was well on his way to his fourth shot of whisky and cursing
the day his little brother had been born.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The Limo turned in a graceful arc around the fountain, and a seething Gerald
Padalecki climbed out of the back, his back rigid, his face set, and Jared stood at the
window of his room and just turned to Jensen and shrugged.
“JARED TRISTAN PADALECKI” his dad bellowed from the hall.
“Show time.” Jensen said so quietly Jared had to strain to hear, and side-by-side,
hand in hand, they descended the stairs. Gerald looked up as they moved closer, the
breath catching in his chest, seeing Ackles taking the steps one at a time, a male
version of the only woman he had ever really loved, until finally they stopped in front
of him.
“What the hell is going on here JT? I wont have an Ackles in my house.”
“Ackles-Padalecki,” Jensen replied automatically, but not loud enough to be heard
over the blustering that was his new father in law.
“What is this nonsense in the papers about marriage boy?” He moved close, despite
being a good few inches shorter than his middle child he seemed to loom over them
both.
“No nonsense Dad, Jensen and I are married.”
“Same sex marriage isn’t legal in Texas, this is ridiculous. For this you drag the
Padalecki name through the mud?”
“It is legal dad, I am married as per every single proviso you added to the
employment contract for shared vice president.”
“Enough is enough boy, is this some kind of joke? That contract quite clearly stated-”
“That I should marry for at least one year.” Jared interrupted carefully.
“I will have this thrown out in court, this is a farce, and a joke… you… married to
this…” Gerald paused, anger reddening his face, temper muddling his words, “this
homosexual,” he finally spat out, “that is not what the contract said and you know
that.”
“I married -”
“I will have this thrown out, this lie, this abomination,”
“You can’t dad,” Jared blindly reached for Jensen’s hand, which Jensen took
immediately, leaning into Jared and giving him silent support, “see I married for love.”
Gerald was bordering on purple, his hands clenched in fists at his side, he wanted to
wrap his hands around his middle son’s neck, the stupid, fucked up… child.
“When a court sees you are not even gay…”
“Dad,” Jared said patiently, “I am bi, always have been, and I met Jensen, and I fell in
love, end of.”
”This is an abomination in the eyes of the Lord.”
“So is shellfish,” Jensen muttered under his breath, squeezing Jared’s hand in
support.
Jared squared his shoulders, as his dad took a step closer, his fists rose at his sides,
spit on his lips from temper, “I wont have this under my roof boy, you hear?”
“Sir,” Jensen began, as Jared hesitated, clearly blindsided by the near violence in
Gerald’s voice, hoping he could maybe inject some calm here before the older man
had a coronary or something.
“Don’t even think to talk to me Ackles,” Gerald spat out, not looking at Jensen, just
staring into Jared’s eyes, the betrayal cutting deep inside him. How could this boy do
this to him? Hadn’t Gerald given him everything?
The door opened and closed behind them, and Jensen raised an eyebrow as Jeff
Padalecki stood with his back to the door, just listening, his face blank, his tall frame
relaxed against the wood of the door. Gerald turned on his heel to look at the new
arrival, his son and heir, his blood, standing at the front door. His plans for his eldest
son, for TexOil, starting to crumble around him and sudden grief clutched inside him,
a feeling he thought he had buried a long time ago. Turning back to his middle child,
he found himself looking directly into Jensen’s eyes, into the hazel green of Donna’s
Ackles eyes, assailed by memories of summers so long ago, and it sent steel to his
spine.
“I will get this thrown out. You hear me boy? You think you are clever? You don’t
know the half of it. I will not have a bastard Ackles under my roof, infecting my family
with their sexual deviancy and their working class filth. End of.”
Jared felt Jensen stiffen beside him, willed him not to rise to the vitriol, the hate in his
dad’s voice, “don’t talk to my husband in that way dad,” he said quietly, markedly
calm against the fury and temper in Gerald. “I love Jensen, we married, and we are
living together in my apartment.” Jared injected every part of his fear and loathing, his
feelings of betrayal, his anger, into that simple sentence, his eyes darting from his
father to his brother.
“Know this Jared,” Gerald began, “I will get this stopped. This changes nothing.”
“Do you worst dad, I wouldn’t expect anything less.” Gerald spun on his heel, walking
with purpose down the hall to his home office, the door slamming hard behind him.
Jeff grimaced at the steel in his brother’s words, half admiring the cunning his sibling
had used in screwing their dad over. In recognition of the words Jared had just
bravely thrown out there he started to clap his hands, slowly rhythmically
“Well played little brother, well played.”
Chapter 7
Jensen let out the breath he didn’t even realize he had been holding. Only certain
words stayed in his head; not the abuse, not the hate that dripped from Gerald’s
mouth, but the words that Jared had used. One sentence that kind of summed up
why exactly Jared was doing what he was doing, or what he believed he was doing it
for.
Jensen dropped his hand, the hold he had on Jared’s hand and turned to climb the
stairs, “we need to talk, “ he said softly, waiting for Jared to snap out of his staring
match with Jeff and get him back up to Jared’s apartment. Jared blinked up at him,
and then cast one last look at his older brother, before climbing the stairs at a slower
pace, finally closing the apartment door behind them. Jared just leaned back against
it, worrying his lower lip with his teeth, showing more in that single action than he had
done since they had made this bargain.
“You wanna tell me what you meant about the vice president thing?” Jensen asked
simply, crossing to the leather sofa and sitting on the edge, hands twined together on
his knees. He wasn’t going to move until he had the story, the entire background of
how they had ended sitting and standing here in this room. “Is there reasons for this
charade other than just pissing off your father?”
Jared sighed and shrugged, knocking his head back against the wood and closing
his eyes, he didn’t want to show Jensen this disappointed side, this knocked down by
the family side. He wanted to be confident, in control of himself, and it just wasn’t
happening and he couldn’t for the life of him understand why. He still had so much to
process, the high of confrontation, the success of what he had done edged with the
complete disappointment in his family. Well his family all apart from Megan, who
despite trying to hit on the gay married guy, at least seemed to accept the marriage.
His mother had yet to give her opinion, her considered opinion, which he knew would
be delivered wrapped in the same ice that ran through her veins. His father had
almost popped a vein in temper, no acceptance of what Jared had done, just anger
and vitriolic hate. And as for his brother, those few words, the sarcasm, the sardonic,
mocking, scornful words… well it was no different than what he was used to.
And now? Now, Jensen wants to know the details, and how could Jared begin to tell
this confident man in front of him just how much temper, anger and rage was inside
him? His only hope was to tell him enough for it to make sense, they were stood in
his apartment, and Jared needed to start now.
“So it started with my father saying he was retiring, well maybe not retiring, but
y’know standing back, and calling Jeff and I in to portion out control of Tex Oil. I
deserve my share… I didn’t get my share.” Jared began, crossing to the other sofa,
aware he probably sounded like a spoiled child.
“You sound a bit like a spoilt child,” Jensen pointed out great
“There are reasons why I should… why I want to have some control… I need to stop
them from…” his voice tailed off. This was all too many secrets and needs that Jared
had spent so many years hiding that wording it was not coming out right.
Jensen leaned forward, his face carefully blank, “ need to stop them from what?”
Jared stared into hazel eyes, the light making them green, freckles sprinkled over the
far too pretty face of his new husband...pretty… and he really wanted to offload, to
Jensen… well to anyone. Only Chad knew the real Jared, the Jared that still survived
the shit that was piled on to him, the secrets he had, the knowledge he had. He didn’t
know Jensen from the next man, only ever heard the detailed impassioned stories
about how the Ackles tried to cheat the Padaleckis out of money and land. About
how Alan Ackles had dragged the name of Padalecki through the courts, accused
Gerald of falsifying land records and forging contracts. How could Jared trust the son
of the man who tried to destroy his family, dysfunctional though it may be, it was still
his family, his name.
He stiffened his spine, and angry suddenly at the questions from the cowboy he
pushed back inside himself the man who wanted to share and pulled stubborn willful
Jared to the foreground. “All you need to know is that you are mine for a year, and
we need to try a damn site harder to convince my father he has no chance to fight
this marriage and as such I fulfill his contract stipulations.”
“OK,” Jensen said patiently, aware that the Jared he almost saw in the man who had
leaned exhausted against the door, had gone in the blink of an eye. He recognized
barriers when he saw them, used the same tools to hide his own worries. It was selfpreservation that made him not push, sensing Jared was jonesing for a fight. “Tell me
about the contract.”
“Simple, my father handed over majority rule to Jeff, being as he is a, married, b, has
children and c, is apparently therefore not gay. Which then means he is the best
person for TexOil. However the middle child apparently, being unmarried, childless
and possible therefore gay can not be considered as an equal partner in what is a
family company.” Jared tried to keep bitterness from his voice but it wasn’t easy and
he saw Jensen wince. He stopped, familiar anger climbing his spine, pushing into
muscles that tensed and clenched, the pain in his neck pushing up into his
headache. Unconsciously he pulled the back of his neck and tilted his head,
stretching the muscles, wincing at the pain. “He added that, as a proviso, should I
marry, for, and I use this word loosely, for love, and stay married for exactly one year,
then he would reassign the percentages so I had the same percentage of TexOil
control as my brother.”
“Married, for a year, for love…” Jensen repeated, “can I just point up, that given you
have probably worked your way through half the Dallas women under the age of
twenty five that finding a suitable wife in amongst them would be fairly easy?”
Jared stood suddenly, a fire in him, that Jensen could pick so easily on the same
thing that JD and Chad had said. “No,” he spat out, turning away from Jensen to face
the window, his face a mask of anger, trying to calm his emotions before he turned
back, Jensen just sitting and staring up at him. “See that would play straight into his
hands, I would be stuck in a marriage based on a lie, and should be have a child… I
couldn’t leave that child… that women… he knows that… he wants me tied down,
finished.” Jared wasn’t aware of it but his face showed so many expressions, from
anger to sadness, that Jensen had a hard time picking them out as separate
emotions.
“You seem to assign an awful lot of slyness to a man you call your father,” Jensen
pointed out simply, “what makes you think he would - ”
“You don’t know him… he might be my father, but I… he’s used to manipulating
me… and this time… he isn’t getting away with it.”
“You need to show me this contract, this agreement that your father pulled
together…” maybe Josh should have a look, “so I know my role.”
“All you need to know Ackles, is that you keep your head down, keep to your side of
the bargain, and in turn I will keep to mine.” In a flurry of movement Jared moved to
the door, pulling it open in a wrenching sudden movement, “I need to get out of here.”
Jensen blinked up at him, watching him leave the room, stress and violence
surrounding his new husband like a suffocating blanket. “Ackles-Padalecki,” he said
to the empty room, and sighing he made to follow Jared down the stairs and out of
the front door.
++++++++++++++++++++++++
The whisky was the oldest, finest, most expensive that Gerald could find, and he had
drunk enough to calm when Jeff knocked and entered the office, a smirk on his face.
“Did you really think he was going to take this laying down?” Jeff pointed out, arms
crossed on his chest, calm and in control.
In contrast his dad was furious, apoplectic and red in the face he was pacing the not
all together small space behind his antique desk, “don’t even start Jeff,” he spat,
finally stopping the pacing.
“He is far from stupid, in fact I think you underestimate him.”
“I am quite aware of how I have underestimated your mother’s son,” he said fast and
instant, anger at the core of the heated words, “and don’t think of talking at me Jeff.
You should be thinking of how we can get him out of this.”
“We go to source,” Jeff said, “leave Jared alone as the easily maneuvered child that
he is and instead focus on Ackles, turn him against his new… “ he hesitated with a
look of distaste on his face, “husband.” Gerald raised his eyebrows, admiring the
cunning that was twisting in his son, “his horses… I hear he is doing more than well
with his horses, so we go there first.”
”I want that Ackles away from this family.”
“Consider it done,” Jeff said confidently.
“The day your bastard brother gets control over my company is the day that hell
freezes over.” Gerald added, hate in his voice.
“He won’t. Believe me I wont let it happen.” Jeff matched the venom in the voice that
controlled his every move, his thoughts blinded by want need have…, blinded to what
was really inside his father.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen caught up with Jared as he stood by one of the 4x4s that were just sitting
there waiting, he was staring at Jensen, just staring and it sent a skitter of awareness
down his spine, the tension in the house following him outside.
“Keys?” he asked and caught as Jared threw them over the roof, snatching them out
of the air and throwing them up, thoughtful and suddenly feeling the need for open
space. “Get in, we are going to the D.”
Jared climbed in without any argument, but stared resolutely out of the window as
they left on the road to Jensen’s home, to the Ackles family home, his phone rang a
total of twice, the first time he just cut off the call, the second time he answered, with
resignation in his voice and words that just fell off of his tongue with practiced ease.
Jensen only got Jared’s side of the conversation but whoever he was talking too
obviously riled Jared with the tone of what he was saying. Frustration and no small
part of exasperation it appeared, despite trying to hide what he was saying by turning
away from Jensen.
“No…we’re not… I can’t understand why you… jeez… the kids… they need, you
need to… listen to me Kristen… NO, I’ve heard that before… OK, OK… yes it’s
true… married… yes I will…” he shot a quick look at Jensen, “…yes we will… we’ll
be there… whatever good that does…” he closed the cell, settling back to face the
front looking out of the windshield.
”And?” Jensen finally said, curiosity pushing at him to question.
“Kristen… Jeff’s wife… wanted to check we would be back for dinner tonight, that’s
all. She’s aware of what’s happened and she’s…” his voice tailed off, and irritation
sparked in Jensen, what the fuck with all the half sentences, it was driving him
freakin’ mad.
“She’s what? Pissed? Sad? Devastated she lost you? What?” Jensen snapped,
taking the next bend maybe a little too sharply causing Jared to slide against the door
with a loud inhalation of breath.
“Scared, she says she’s scared.” Jared bit out, rubbing at his shoulder and frowning
in irritation.
Jensen said nothing; it was just another question on the long list of questions he was
writing in his head, a list he would pull out later for damn sure.
When he drove through the main gates with the two D’s entwined in an intricate twist
of metal he felt every ounce of stress falling away, felt at home, pulling himself visibly
taller, a smile on his face, pride in every pore, whilst next to him Jared seemed to
sink lower into his seat. He pulled to a stop outside the main house, at right angles to
the red side barn, turned off the engine and leant against the steering wheel. He had
something to say, something that was eating away inside him, Jared had to know,
needed to know, what Jensen had inside his heart.
“OK het…” he started with his usual lack of reverence, then pushed that down, this
was not a joke, “…Jared, this is gonna be one hell of a long year, and before we do
anything else, before we take one step outside of this truck, there is one thing I
wanna get something off my chest.”
Jared paused with his hand on the door, “OK?”
“I want you to know that I hate you… what you did… that you used Mac… against
me… that you knew before me… that I had no choice in this.” He realized he
sounded confused at what he was trying to say, but Jared wouldn’t look him in the
eyes, knew in his heart, where guilt and anger both battled for dominance, just what it
was that Jensen was explaining. He said nothing, just opened the door and climbed
out, his feet heavy on the hard packed ground below them and then he stood, just
looking at the barns and the house as he had done that first day, wondering at how
quickly the week had gone.
Suddenly it was just as important for Jared to say what was inside him, “are you
gonna make my life miserable now?” he started, “are you gonna get your revenge for
what I did?”
Jensen climbed down from the seat and came round to stand next to Jared, leaning
in so he could speak low and firm, “I don’t have the capacity for the kind of hate that
the Padalecki family seems to have Jared. Mac is ill, has been ill, is pregnant, could
die, I have two mares about to foal that could make the D the best horse ranch in the
state, and now I have the money to help me with both.” He stopped, sighing,
reaching up to grasp Jared at the back of his neck, long chestnut brown hair curling
over his fingers, his hold firm, pulling Jared’s head down. “I don’t have anything left
inside to deal with you and your petty squabbles. For now, I need to play my part,
keep my end of the bargain, and that starts with fairly obvious public displays of
affection.”
Jared didn’t argue as Jensen placed warm lips against his, his hands twisting harder
in hair and holding him in place, running the tip of his tongue over Jared’s lower lip,
pushing for him to let him in,” pulling back briefly all he said was, “make it a good one
for the audience het-boy,” and then he was back there, pulling the very breath from
Jared’s body as the older man slanted his mouth and began the hottest open mouth
kiss Jared had ever been on the end of. It wasn’t hard to go with the flow, his hands
resting on Jensen’s hips, one moving again to settle at the dip in his spine, resting on
the belt of his jeans, whispers of wanting more in his subconscious. A small groan
started in his throat as he could feel himself hardening against Jensen’s leg and also
feel the flush of arousal burning in the tight restricting denim. Jensen said nothing,
just twisted slightly, pushing Jared back against the car, his own arousal hard and
insistent against Jared. Finally Jensen pulled back, Jared chasing the kiss and
whining at the loss before he realized where he was and exactly why they were
kissing.
“I signed the damn contract Jared,” Jensen whispered against damp kiss marked
lips, “and I will be the husband you need, doesn’t mean we have to like each other.”
Without another word he turned on his heel walking half way to the house and
stopping, “coming?”
Jared was stunned and also verging on embarrassed, for a good few minutes he
didn’t know what he felt, apart from freakin’ turned on. He willed his hard on to go
away as Donna stood on the steps calling down to them both. Jared pasted a smile
on his face, a genuine I’m pleased to see you smile and join Jensen, holding out a
hand to grasp, and taking a deep breath he climbed the stairs for the third time in one
week.
“The vet is here Jensen,” Donna said quickly, “nothing awful, just Solo-Col was
restless.” Jensen looked back at the first barn torn between what he needed to do,
visit with family, and what he wanted to do, visit with his horses.
“Jared, I just need to go check, I’ll be back in a bit,” he finally said.
“Er… you want me to come with?” Jared offered, clearly also weighing up pros and
cons, although Jensen imagined it was more along the lines of death by horse versus
death by Ackles family.
“I’ll be ten minutes,” Jensen said, releasing Jared’s hand and jogging towards the
barn, aware all eyes were on him as he left, and waving back in dismissal. Jared
sighed and climbed the last few steps stopping when he was at the same height as
Jensen’s mom, quickly and efficiently pulled into a tight hug and pulled into the warm
kitchen. It smelt the same, something was cooking, Jared guessed it was some kind
of stew was in a large pot on the stove, the smell of bread permeating the rooms. He
sniffed the air appreciatively and was treated to the incredibly awesome sight of fresh
cookies and coffee on the table.
“Jared,” Donna began, glancing out of the kitchen window towards the barn, “you
know Jensen, you realize he will be at least an hour if not more,” she laughed,
pushing a fresh coffee his way and indicating he should help himself to cookies,
which he did with a polite thank you ma’am..
Mac came in somewhere between the first and second cookie, sitting down
diagonally from Jared, not looking at him, just quietly sipping on some foul smelling
herbal tea and nibbling on a cookie of her own. Where was the brave girl who stood
between him and her brother, the one who questioned his motives? She wasn’t here
in this quiet child woman who didn’t say a word.
“So,” began Jared, just for something to say, deciding to stay off of the subject of
pregnancy in case Donna wasn’t in the loop yet, “I’ve seen you hanging around with
Chad.”
Mac actually smiled, and then blushed, “I met him in hospital when I was fourteen, I
guess, he had been through all the same stuff as me, had come out the other end,
was living, was well, and he looked after me in the ward. He was only there when my
family couldn’t be, but it was the lonely times, three in the morning…” she paused,
her face lost in memories…
“He’s a good guy,” Jared offered, wanting to tell her about the Chad that he knew, the
Chad that supported him, laughed with him, gave him space away from his family,
but couldn’t find the words to talk to the girl he had betrayed to her brother.
Jensen wasn’t as long as Donna had suggested he might be but was definitely away
longer than ten minutes, but when he walked into the kitchen it was to smiles and
laughter and to a husband that seemed to have relaxed a few notches.
“Wanna see my babies?” he offered impulsively, which was how Jared found himself
in the dim interior of the main barn, his hands gently stroking the softness that was
Solo-Col and listening to Jensen explain her bloodline, her potential, the one point
four million her foal could bring if it all went well, how this foal could be the making of
the D.
Jared followed Jensen to the fence that formed one end of the corral leaning against
it and looking thoughtfully at the horses in the fields beyond. Quietly Jensen leaned in
for another kiss, quick and fast, whispering, we’re being watched against Jared’s
warm face.
As Jared listened to Jensen, listened to pride and love for bloodlines and the family
ranch, he could feel the tension across his neck start to release, like this was
somewhere he could relax.
Donna watched her son, his shoulders broad, his stance relaxed, from her kitchen,
thoughtful, knowing her son, loving her son, wanting him to be happy. It was easier to
lose herself in times when she was happier, before Alan went too far, lost his dignity,
lost her love, before resentment took him from her. The pride of the D was in her son,
it was in every inch of him, and she just wondered what deal he had made with the
devil to keep his family safe.
Mac started to stand to leave the table, and Donna couldn’t keep things inside any
longer, turning to pull her youngest into a close hug. “Sweetheart,” she began, trying
her best not to cry, not to scream, to be the best mother she could, “I think there is
something you maybe want to tell me?”
Chapter 8
The knock on the door was loud in the quiet apartment, the iPod silent in the rooms
normally full of noise.
It had been a long hard tiring week, a virus had knocked him for six, and his usual
sunny outlook on life was somewhat dented. But it wasn’t that that kept the music off.
He had received final word from the lawyers on his trust fund, and no, he couldn’t get
access to it before his 30th birthday whatever the reason. But it wasn’t that that made
him want to sit in silence.
He was sitting in silence ever since he had received the phone call, and now he sat
waiting for Mac, worried to death. Seven words, are you alone, can I come over,
seven simple words, but she had sounded half defeated, quietly sad, and it sent
shivers down his spine. He knew what it was like to deal with the threat of death, had
pulled through, and he thought she had too, that it was all over.
He hesitated before opening the door, twisting his hands in his hair, his heart heavy,
this wasn’t the first time, nor would it be the last, that Mackenzie had called just to
talk, or visited just to talk. But, with the whole pregnancy thing his levels of support,
his love for Mackenzie and her unborn child threatened to break him in half. Last time
they met had been the worst, on his knees with a diamond solitaire in his hand he
had proposed the best solution, marry me Mac, he had asked out of love, but all she
saw was the age difference, ten long years that had made him a man, and the fear of
why he was proposing. She wouldn’t tell him who the father was, but he had his
suspicions, had even made to confront the person he thought had created life with
the girl he loved, but he didn’t. Not when she cried and begged him to leave it, that
one day he would know. You can’t protect me, not from him, she had sobbed, and
then just stopped, like every word she said would be a clue for Chad’s fertile
imagination to cling on to.
Taking a deep breath and pasting the best friend smile he had practiced to perfection
on his face, he opened the door, Mac standing there on the threshold, looking like the
world had been pulled from under her. Without words she fell into his embrace,
standing still and silent, her head on his chest, her breathing shallow, and he pulled
the door shut.
“Hey princess,” he began softly, “what’s wrong?” He felt her full body sigh as she
gripped into the soft cotton of his shirt.
“Momma knows,” she said simply and quietly, so soft he had to strain to hear. Donna
knew?
“Oh baby girl,” he didn’t know what to say to that one, only knowing he had always
said she should have told her mom from day one “it was gonna happen sooner rather
than later.” Mac nodded against his chest. “How did she… what did she say?” A sob
hitched in her throat, and if it was possible she was burying herself deeper into his
embrace. Had Donna not understood? Had she been angry? That wasn’t the Donna
he knew. “Tell me Mac, what did she say?” She only cried harder, and desperate to
just see into her eyes he swept her up into his arms, wincing at the slight weight of
her and crossing to the sofa, slumping into the corner and holding her close. With his
free hand he tilted her head back, her beautiful green eyes wide and full of tears, and
he buried that same hand in her long dark blond hair. “Mac?”
“She was good, we talked and… she said she was worried… but she knew having
children… she said it completed her. It made me feel…” she stopped, her voice
choked… she didn’t want this man who held her to look at her differently, to see her
as anything other than a strong person, but she couldn’t hold it in. “I’m just so sorry...”
Simple words that shattered him.
“Sorry for what babe?”
“For letting her down, for letting you down, for Jensen, for Josh… I’ve failed every
one.”
Chad tightened his grip, she thought she had let people down, failed them
somehow... failed him? He couldn’t reconcile her thought processes here. “What?”
He wished he could form a better sentence.
“I’ve done this. This is my fault, I’m a burden on my family… I’ve been so stupid.”
“No… never… I love you Mackenzie Ackles, your family loves you, and you saying
you have failed us, well that is just plain stupid.” His voice cracked with emotion and
her eyes filled with more tears, as she half nodded.
“Hold me Chad… hold me and make it all go away.” So Chad did just that, until she
grew quiet in his arms and he could reach his cell, scrolling to find Donna’s number
and letting her know Mac was here with him.
It was only much later that night that he remembered one single sentence Mac had
added as they talked quietly
Jensen… he was broken when he told me he knew.
What did she mean? Had he guessed? How had Jensen known?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen sat back on the sofa in Jared’s apartment, waiting for Jared to get out of the
shower, as relaxed as he could be knowing he was facing the entire Padalecki clan
at dinner in less than half an hour. Jared had given him as much of a heads up as he
could about each member, but none of that explained why a clearly inebriated blond
was leaning against the inside of their door, a glass of red wine in her hand and a
thin smile on her face. Kristen. Jeff’s wife.
Dressed in little more than what he imagined qualified for underwear, a thin silk wrap
falling off delicate shoulders she glanced towards the shower and began to walk that
way, Jensen standing and blocking the movement with a polite, “ma’am?”
Carefully she leaned into Jensen, her eyes a little unfocused, “jus’ have some
business to take care of with the stud there,” she all but purred, syllables lengthened
and sultry as she pouted up at Jensen and gestured towards the closed bathroom
door.
“I’m sure it can wait,” Jensen offered politely, wincing as scarlet tipped nails rested on
his fresh white shirt, and that pout grew bigger.
”When I got the invite I’mma sure it didn’t mention a threesome, handsome,” she
commented, tossing back long blond hair and tilting her hips to his. Carefully he
placed hands on her arms and pushed her back, wine sloshing in the glass, he heels
making her unsteady. Jeez talk about cliché, underwear and heels, not so much for
the classy then.
“I’ll be sure an’ tell Jared you visited,” Jensen said firmly guiding her to the door. A
sudden look of clarity sparked into otherwise dead eyes and she narrowed them.
“You’re that Ackles boy, John, Justin…”
“Jensen.”
“Jensen. Jensen Ackles, what you doing here in the Padalecki prison?” She finally
offered, sipping at the wine and leaning into his hold, the very same hold that was
probably the only thing keeping her vertical.
”Ackles-Padalecki actually,” Jensen returned, “Jared and I are married.” Her eyes
dropped to the platinum ring on Jensen’s ring finger, and then back up to Jensen’s
face and in a smooth movement that belied her apparent drunken state she thrust the
wine at him, which he took out of pure reaction, releasing one of his hands so she
stumbled.
She pulled herself tall, “you are so gonna need that big guy,” she said simply, and
swaying on her heels she let herself out of the room, leaving Jensen standing
wondering just what had happened, with a glass of wine in his hands. He was still
standing there when Jared emerged fully dressed, again, from the bathroom, his
eyebrow raised in question at the wine in Jensen’s hand.
Jensen just shook his head, like he was saying don’t ask. “Have you been there hetboy?”
“Where?” Jared was clearly confused.
“Kristen.”
“My brothers wife?” Was Jared being deliberately obtuse about this? After all he had
allegedly invited Kristen up here for some inter family sex.
“Your brothers wife… yes.”
“Erm… no… you don’t fuck about on family,” Jared was hesitant but firm, and Jensen
believed him. Jared may have the catting morals of a whore but about this Jensen
really did believe him. “Ready?” Jared finally said as Jensen just stared at him,
making him feel somewhat uncomfortable.
”As I’ll ever be.” Jensen replied, placing the wine glass on the table and straightening
to see a nervous looking Jared by the door.
Jared paused, turning back to face Jensen, “Just so you know, we are gonna need
some definite PDAs tonight. Think you can handle that?” There was irritation in
Jared’s voice, a subtle change, a certain stress, Jensen imagined it was a
manifestation of fear, it made him feel better to think that. In answer Jensen moved
carefully past Jared, sliding a hand over the younger man’s black silk shirt, his fingers
brushing Jared’s left nipple, hearing a hiss of indrawn breath as his hard thigh
touched briefly against Jared.
“I can handle anything you need het-boy.” He started, his voice low and growly, “just
follow me for the cues.” Jared watched after him as his new husband waited at the
top of the stairs. The instant flash of lust that pooled in his groin at Jensen’s touch
was both unsettling and hot, and it suddenly scared the shit out of him, not gay, not
gay, not even a little bit bi, not gay. Jensen held out his hand, “husband?” he
smirked.
Jared moved to take the hand and they started down the sweeping staircase, “fuck
you asshole,” Jared forced out behind a covering smile.
“Not if I fuck you first.” Jensen said fast and clear, smirking again as Jared stumbled
against the staircase, “careful sweetheart,” he added for any audience below, “you
wouldn’t wanna fall and break your neck would you?”
“Jared, you made it,” Megan’s voice, and Jensen looked over the side of the stairs to
see Jared’s younger sibling, casual in jeans and a T, a grin on her face.
“And you little sister are running late.” They reached the bottom of the stairs, Megan
leaning up to hug her brother in close.
“Meh, they’re used to me by now,” she pointed out laughing, and with a smack on
Jensen’s backside she scampered up the stairs, turning right at the top to her own
private area. Jared had a fond smile on his face, it was a new expression, one
Jensen hadn’t see before, and it intrigued him. It intrigued him because, in this
dysfunctional shit fest of a family, brother and sister actually seemed to be close.
Very interesting.
Jared’s mom was sitting waiting, as was Jeff and the blond wife, Kristen, thankfully in
more clothes than before. Jared’s dad however, was notable in his absence, as were
Jeff and Kristen’s kids. Jared slid into an empty chair, Jensen pulling out the one next
to him, and laying a large and very warm hand on his husband’s thigh.
“Evenin’ y’all,” he drawled in his best cowboy, relaxing back in his chair, watching as
Jared’s mother glanced his way and then back to her discussion with Jeff, not even
giving Jensen the time of day. Jensen just inwardly smiled, squeezing Jared’s leg
and causing the poor unsuspecting man to shoot suddenly upwards in his chair.
“Are you OK, Jared?” Kristen simpered, her eyes flint over the rim of her glass, half
smiling and pushing her hair back with her free hand. In response Jensen just leaned
into Jared, pushing his long hair to one side, and dropping a small kiss on his
exposed hazel skin, glancing back at Kristen with a look on his face that closely
resembled, yeah right bitch, in your dreams. She nodded her head at the win, sipping
carefully on her wine, looking back at her mother-in-law and pretending to listen.
Score one to Ackles-Padalecki for marking his territory.
A maid hovered at the door, and she was dismissed with a curt, does it look like we
are all here? from Jeff, and it was only when Padalecki senior, in all his dark suited
arrogance deigned to join them that they actually began to eat. Jensen didn’t
remember much of what he ate, but thankfully Megan placed herself diagonal to him
and at least he could carry out a conversation with her. A conversation beyond the
usual crap centering on the Texas Oil industry and who was knifing whom in the
back. It was only when he felt Jared tense beneath his hand, which had remained for
the most part on his husband’s strong thigh, that Jensen snapped back to the
conversation down the other end. Someone had mentioned a familiar name,
something had been said that caused Jared to stop eating and place his knife and
fork clattering onto the plate.
“Oh I’m sorry Jared, that Chad boy is a friend of yours I believe?” This from Sherry
Padalecki, who was leaning into the conversation, a look of barely restrained glee on
her face, spoiling for a fight. Jared said nothing; it was always the best way.
“I hear your friend is seeing that Ackles girl, Madeline or something,” Sherry was
sipping her own wine, speaking to her husband and Jeff, deliberately facing away
from Jared and Jensen. “She must be so pleased to be mixing with a good family like
the Murray’s,” she added, this time looking directly at Jensen, who simply raised an
eyebrow in response, not willing to rise to the deliberate provocation he could see
was being spun.
“Seems like a family trait, Ackles kids deliberately marrying into money, but I guess
that is one way to get yourselves out of debt.” This from Jeff who exchanged nods
with Gerald.
“How is she to know any different,” began, Gerald, “she has good example in her
brother after all, he has just married one of the richest men in the state. Poor girl
probably doesn’t know any better than to whore herself out to get the same.”
Jensen’s temper went from gently simmering to boiling in seconds, but he waited…
waited for Jared to jump in and defend, wanting just one word, like a husband would,
even one that wasn’t real. But he said nothing, not one single thing. Jensen stood
abruptly.
“Ladies,” he said simply, nodding to Megan who sat with incredible stillness in her,
her eyes wide, then he added a single word, not a question, more a command,
“Jared.”
Jared looked up at him, then over at his father, who sat with determination on his
face, daring his son to leave. Decision made, as easy as breathing, he stood, and
saying nothing he followed Jensen out of the door, words of disdain following him in
soft voices.
Jensen virtually dragged him up the stairs, his temper still high, so many thoughts
pushing through and trying to fight for priority, his inherent worry for Mac, the vicious
words at the table, the fact that Jared just sat there, the whole Kristen flirtation,
Jared’s offer for Kristen to come on over for sex, all too much. They actually made it
to the room with the door shut behind them before Jensen completely lost it, pushing
hard at Jared’s chest, catching him off guard and causing him to stumble back
against the wall. Jensen was on him before Jared could catch his balance, one hand
flat on his chest, the other by his head against the door.
“Know this husband, you fuckin’ back down on me like that again, and I will make
sure you live to regret it.”
“Jens-“
“Fuck you Jared, fuck you and your family, you had better make sure they leave my
sister out of this.”
“OK,” Jared raised a hand, pushing against Jensen’s chest, trying to move him away,
suddenly very enclosed, not used to being cornered like this. “I’m sorry, OK? I’m
sorry.”
“My sister…” Jensen’s words were low, threatening, his hazel green eyes stormy and
his lips tight in anger, a high flush on his cheekbones.
”Off limits, I’ll make sure of it.”
”Do that het-boy, do that.”
In a blaze of anger Jensen turned away, stripping at clothes as he went, pulling off
the wool sweater, and shucking off the dark pants, grabbing at jeans and his T,
pulling them on and dragging an old denim jacket over his broad shoulders.
“Where are you going?” Jared asked softly, despite his height and weight advantage
he knew a man on the edge, and he winced as Jensen reached past him to pull at
the door.
“Getting out of here, I’ll be in the car, you wanna come with me het-boy, then you get
your rich ass downstairs. I’m leaving in ten.”
Shit
Chapter 9
It didn’t take long for Jared to decide. He knew in his heart that he owed Jensen an
apology, and it wasn’t just the threat of physical violence that made him see that. For
too many years he had just switched himself off from all the shit at the dinner table, at
family events, cut himself off from anything to do with this family. Tonight was
different. It was apathy that stopped him from saying anything, not a lack of courage
on his part. Jensen couldn’t see that in the man he married, and Jared deserved
every word that had been thrown at him. He glanced down at what he was wearing,
black pants and the silk shirt and wondered where they were going that meant
Jensen pulled on jeans. In a flurry of movement he changed into his normal dark
jeans and the same worn Cowboys sweatshirt he had made Jensen wear earlier that
same day at breakfast.
In five minutes he was at the door of the truck, climbing into the passenger side and
saying nothing, as Jensen started off down the drive with barely restrained anger in
every sharp movement of his hands. The truck had tinted windows, which was good
considering the paparazzi that had started to gather at the main gates to the
Padalecki mansion. It hadn’t taken long, just short hours since the announcement in
the Times, and already the vultures circled, zoom and wide-angle lenses at the
ready, waiting to get a view of Jared Padalecki and his new husband. Jared saw the
flashes, thumbed his cell and sent a quick text to Megan, at least giving her a heads
up. She normally thrived on all the publicity, but still, her supposedly heterosexual
brother married to a guy, was going to throw the Padaleckis to the entire three ring
circus without a safety net. Jared didn’t give a shit about the rest of the family, but
Megan, and his niece and nephew, they didn’t deserve the stress. Megan would
know what to do, maybe pull Kristen to one side, warn her somehow, try to push
through the alcoholic haze their sister in law was permanently in, maybe even get the
nanny involved.
“Where are we going?” Jared finally asked, looking at Jensen expectantly. For his
pains all Jensen did was turn up the stereo, the strains of some heavy rock anthem
filling the empty space. Jared just turned to look out of the window at the flat Texas
land disappearing beside the truck, the steady thrum of tyre on blacktop drowned out
by the heavy rock vocals.
Jensen drove with purpose, inch by inch the tension inside of him draining away; next
to his horses driving was the one of the only things that relaxed him, but where they
were going now, it was the ultimate antidote to life. It was the same place he had
been going since he was old enough to pass for drinking age, on his own, sometimes
with Josh. He always left with a lightness in his heart that belied the financial
problems and the worries he held inside him for Mac and his mom. Shooters was
little more that a roadhouse on a back road, kept alive by locals with knowledge and
bikers who had it pinned on some kind of word of mouth biker’s map. It was old and
worn and felt anonymous and safe to anyone that strayed that way. When they
stopped outside of the SUV, Jensen turned off the stereo, crossed his arms on the
steering wheel and leaned forward.
“OK, one question before we go in,” he started carefully, not sure how to word this
one, not worrying about Jared’s reaction to being asked, more worrying about his
own temper if Jared gave him the wrong answer or Jensen could see he was lying.
“Is this what you do?” Jared turned to him, snapping and tired, “wait ‘til you get men
in your truck and then refuse to let them leave until they answer questions?” Jensen
assumed he was referring to this morning at the D and half smirked.
“This is your truck,” Jensen pointed out and watched as Jared actually huffed his
irritation.
“What then?” Jared snapped back, “what else have I done?”
“All I wanna know… jeez… did you invite Kristen up for sex today?” Jensen just
blurted it out, and then held his breath, the sudden stillness in the car unnerving.
Jared blinked at him, his mouth falling open, and denial so obvious in his face. “Fuck
no,” he simply said, frowning, “and if she said I did, then she’s just screwing with ya,”
“OK.”
”OK.”
”Right”
Jared snorted, “me and Kristen…”
“Whatever.” Before Jared could phrase a comeback on Jensen’s less than witty
response Jensen himself was outside the car, keys in his hand and a look of
impatience on his face. Jared climbed down more sedately, idly looking at the other
occupants of the parking area. Consisting of mainly bikes, with a few beat up trucks,
his brand new SUV stood out like a sore thumb, not being helped at all by the JPAD1
personalised plates and he cast a final worried glance around him before following
Jensen to the door and hearing the reassuring click of the central locking as it
secured the truck.
The door opened to controlled chaos, noise, talking, music on a jukebox in the
corner, a small stage, people of all types standing in groups, couples, or singly,
drinking beer, this was what Jared could make out in the half gloom. It smelt of
smoke, beer and aged wood and had a decidedly spartan interior which disappeared
into the murky obscurity of half hidden corners where conversations, to Jared’s
untrained eyes, looked decidedly shady. He unconsciously moved closer to Jensen,
all six foot four of muscle deciding experience definitely outweighed brawn on this
occasion. They reached the bar, Jensen scouting the clientele with a quick glance
and ordering beers with a casual flick of his hand and a southern smile dripping with
charm.
With beers in hand they settled in one of the dark corners, Jensen wanting to slide
lower in his chair, beer in hand and do what he did best, people watch. Tonight
however, he had a man sitting opposite him, his husband, in the worn Cowboys
sweatshirt, hair falling in disarray free from his earlier careful pushing back off of his
face. He looked a little shell-shocked, and more than a little uncomfortable, squirming
ever so slightly in the wooden seat, nursing the beer and every so often leaning his
head back to swallow the cold liquid. Jensen sighed inwardly, wishing he could just
relax and enjoy, when all he could do was watch. Watch the freaking throat as it
moved to swallow the beer, watch the cold liquid clinging to Jared lips, watch Jared’s
tongue as it chased the stray drops… just watch. He shifted in his seat,
uncomfortably hardening in his pants as he watched long graceful fingers that had
never known manual labour, gently slide up and down the bottle, circling the lip and
dropping to rest on the table. This was ridiculous. Jared freaking Ackles-Padalecki
and his stupid freaking hands and his stupid freaking neck, it was enough to break
the no sex rule here and now. Not to mention what was under that sweatshirt, a
strong chest, tight muscles that flexed and bunched under the silk shirt he had worn
for dinner, and the tightest… yes really… the tightest ass he had seen outside of a
rodeo.
“So,” he began, shifting again to relieve some of the pressure, “two days down, 363
to go,” he finally offered, causing Jared to swing back from where he had been
watching a heated debate at the bar.
“Uh huh,” Jared offered in reply, which was kind of weak given the opening Jensen
had thrown out there.
Jensen didn’t respond, just slid to a comfortable position and shut himself off from the
crap that was his life at the moment, watching a few casual hook-ups, seeing couples
disappearing into the shadows. He was wondering, at that moment, why he thought it
was a good idea to bring his husband to the place, that only this time last week, was
the place he had last had anything resembling sex. He didn’t see the guy in here
tonight, but that wasn’t unusual, visitors came and went, transient travellers who
crossed the country for business or pleasure, so Jensen didn’t expect to see him. He
was however clearly aware of the guy at the bar who was staring at Jared. Tall,
dressed in denim, a Stetson low on his head, beer in his hand he was definitely
staring. Definitely. Staring.
Jensen guessed he needed to be prepared for this but it didn’t stop the hot stab of
anger that this man was staring quite so blatantly. Shuffling his chair he moved closer
to Jared who looked at him with something akin to the expression a startled
jackrabbit in headlights might have. Jared looked behind him, expecting at any
minute to spot his dad or his brother, guessing that maybe it was time for one of
Jensen’s PDAs. He was feeling conflicting emotions fighting inside him. Lust, a
healthy dose of lust, which he couldn’t get a handle on, warring with embarrassment
and shame.
The lust part, well he imagined if he thought about it he could blame Chad. Chad and
his stories of hot sweaty hard sex with partners in the past, long before he settled on
Mac, long before. Stories of being held, of being dominated and pushed by someone
of equal size, of explosive orgasms just by being told what to do. Jared had always
been intrigued by that, listened carefully, even asked questions. He was so used to
being careful, to being so huge, so big compared to the many girls he had slept with,
or as he should label it, fucked. They all got off on it, his size, his strength, and his
ability to hold them with one hand and take them over the edge. Sometimes though,
in some of his kinkier hook-ups outside of the debutante market, some of which
involved the exchange of monies, he enjoyed being the one to be pushed around.
And now, sat here, with Jensen moving closer, his eyes focusing on something
behind Jared’s head there was anticipation curling in his groin, his heart quickening
and his blood racing in his arteries and veins. Jensen deliberately placed his beer on
the table and leaned in to talk, low and careful, but Jared beat him too it, “there isn’t
anyone here that matters for a show,” he protested, even as Jensen’s hand slid up
under the hem of the sweatshirt and touched heated skin. Jared shook a full body
shudder, pushing back in his chair.
Jensen smiled, his lips close, damn close, “every husband needs to mark his
territory,” and on a splutter from the clearly bemused Jared he bit gently on Jared’s
lower lip before soothing the pressure with a touch of his tongue, pushing into a
startled gasp to taste his new husband. Noise receded, worry receded, thoughts just
vanished and all that was left was Jensen. Far too soon he pulled away, Jared
leaning forward, the beer bottle in his hand sliding through damp fingers and
clattering to the table.
Jensen watched out of the corner of his eye as the man at the bar turned his back
and smiled inwardly, relaxing back in his chair, he could make a career of these
PDAs, especially considering how freaked it made Jared.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Mac… wake up babe… Mac…” They had fallen asleep on the sofa, Mac curled into
him like a cat, his arms curved round her protectively. As the sun pushed it’s way
through the half turned blinds Chad knew he had to move them to somewhere more
comfortable if only to save her back which he knew had to be aching. Half asleep she
stretched against him, leaning up to entwine her hands around his neck, pushing
against the heat and sighing.
”M’up,” she murmured, wincing at the knot in her lower spine and stretching again.
Chad wondered how much more he could take of this stretching half purring kitten in
his lap, wanting nothing more than to scoop her up and carry her to his bed. He
wanted to kiss her, from her dark blond hair, to the freckles on her face, to the gentle
roundness of her belly where he knew her child was growing. He wanted so much…
he just didn’t know how to start to ask.
They stumble-hugged into the kitchen, settling for breakfast at the table, Mac hoping
her rebellious stomach quietened and allowed her to eat the cereal Chad had placed
in front of her. Morning sickness hadn’t been so bad and at 20 weeks it was in the
past now, but the anxiety from last night was still churning inside her.
“Can I ask you a question Mac?”
“Uh huh.”
”You said last night Jensen knew… did he guess… was he cool with it.” Mac closed
her eyes and rubbed at them with small fists, her heart suddenly heavy.
“He was devastated Chad, he cried, he sat next to me and he cried…” Chad grasped
at one of the fists pulling it away from her face, seeing the pain on her face, “it was
awful… I hurt him so much.”
“Maybe we should have told him?” Chad didn’t even realise he had used we but Mac
heard and she smiled inwardly, a feeling of warmth spreading through her. “You
shouldn’t have had to tell him alone.”
“I didn’t have to tell him, he knew, somehow he knew. I didn’t ask him how… I
probably need to ask him how he knew.”
They sat in silence, eating cereal and both lost in thoughts, finally Chad stood, rinsing
bowls and idly skimming through yesterdays post. In amongst the papers and the
envelopes, one article on the inside pages of yesterday’s paper caught his eye and
the world fell beneath his feet.
Son of a bitch.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff hated these clandestine meetings, cursing his little brother for forcing him into
this position.
“Just the Ackles family. No one hurts my brother. Well not much anyway.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Mr Murray is here,” his secretary announced even as Chad pushed into Jared’s
office with intent, his face carefully blank, and his eyes full of something Jared
couldn’t define. Scrambling to stand he rounded the desk, pissed Chad was
something that worried him, it took a lot to get his friend upset, and in the far reaches
of his mind he knew why Chad was here.
“Chad-“ he began, holding his hands up to placate his only real friend, wanting to say
I’m sorry but unable to say anything as Chad’s clenched fist connected with his
cheekbone and sent him staggering back against his wide oak desk. He ducked even
as the next punch connected with his temple, feeling a sudden dizziness as his head
snapped back and Chad was there looming over him, pushing him back on the desk,
his hands wrapped in Jared’s shirt shaking him in temper.
”What the fuck have you done Jay?”
”Chad-“ another blow connected with his chin, and Jared had nowhere else to go,
summoning every bit of strength he had to push back at Chad, who was like a brick
wall with his temper. Finally he managed to get a handle on it, standing and moving
away from Chad, blood dripping from a cut on his forehead, his hands out in front of
him again.
Chad was breathing hard, a hand unconsciously over his heart and Jared winced at
the sight, he never meant for this to happen. “What did you do Jared?” Chad asked,
his voice controlled, “I told you about Mackenzie Ackles in confidence, as my best
friend… you know what she means to me… and you do what… you use it to get
Ackles into bed with you? What the fuck?”
“Chad… I’m sorry… it’s not what you think.” no… not just into bed… not at all… just
to get what is rightfully mine…
“Not what I think? Are you telling me you didn’t somehow use what I told you about
Mac against her own brother?”
What could Jared say? It was exactly what he had done. He was standing in front of
his best friend, the only one who looked through the Padalecki name and saw a man
capable of more, and now, that man was destroying the friendship as easy as
snapping a pencil. Final. Sudden.
Chad began backing from the room, his hands blindly finding the handle behind him,
were those tears in his eyes?, “you bastard.”
“Chad… wait… talk to me…” Jared was pleading, “let me explain…”
“No,” Chad said simply, and with nothing more he slipped from the room, leaving
Jared bleeding and guilt ridden in the map room.
It felt final, how could they ever get back from this?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
They slipped into a routine as Mr and Mr Ackles-Padalecki; Jared spent his days at
TexOil, Jensen spent his at the D, and the early morning and late evenings they
came together at the Padalecki Mansion, dinners and breakfasts in the simmering
cauldron of bitterness that was the family.
Jensen had simply nodded when Jared explained the bruised face, well not
explained exactly, but waved it away. He mumbled something about Chad and a fight
and Jensen didn’t pry, Jared took to pulling his hair across the cut, to hide it from
prying eyes, and luckily none of the Paparazzi shots showed anything other than
Jared relaxed and at ease with his smiling husband.
Articles came and went, and within a week the story had been mostly forgotten, it
didn’t matter how rich Jared was, or how much of a ladies man he had been before, it
somehow seemed like the marriage was controversial but acceptable. Money
obviously did buy a lot of things in Jensen’s opinion, including the influence to stop
printing stories, the responsibility for which he laid squarely at Gerald’s door. Gerald
who refused to look at him let alone talk to him, which was really very OK with him.
Twice they revisited Shooters, twice Jensen felt public PDAs were necessary; twice
Jared almost lost it by dragging Jensen in for more. They held hands in the house,
kissed in the house, always the show, always when an audience was close, but when
the doors shut on the world outside that was the end of it.
Down time meant Jensen lost on his laptop, calculating feed and finances, planning
visits for breeders and riders keen on Solo-Col’s foal, and Jared idly doodling in his
journal.
If Jensen saw what Jared doodled, what his husband’s brain was thinking up, a
company on his own... a land exploration company... away from TexOil, then he may
well have wondered what exactly Jared was doing with this whole fair percentage
stroke arranged marriage thing. Jared’s plans were complex, and each night the
journal was locked away in the safe in the apartment, testament to Jared’s reluctance
to share his thoughts with the world just yet.
The Saturday of the party had been and gone, Jared’s nephew, Luke, as spoilt as
any seven year old could be, but it was an event that Jensen listed as yet another
facet to his husband’s complex and sometimes bizarre personality. Jared had
relaxed, easy given the only Padaleckis in attendance besides him were Luke and
his sister Annabelle, Kristen and Megan. Add in twenty or so other children, ice
cream and a bouncy castle, it was hyper Jared at his best.
And then there was tonight.
The first real function they were attending as a married couple. Some annual charity
fundraiser for a charity Jensen had never heard of. Still he had agreed to all of this in
the contract, and so, donning black tie he now stood, pacing the apartment waiting
on Jared who, yet again, was getting changed in the bathroom. Jensen laughed to
himself; if Jared knew that Jensen watched him when he slept, as his T-shirt pulled
up to expose hazel skin he would probably freak given as how when he was awake
he covered everything.
“Jared, come on man.” Jensen really hated being late; it was a pet peeve of his and
he could feel his irritation rising, only to completely disappear when Jared came out
of the bathroom, and every molecule of oxygen was sucked from Jensen in a flash.
Jeez, holy hell on a stick. Six four of Jared, with his hair brushed back, his face
smooth of stubble, the tux, jeez, the tux, moulding every muscle, every inch of his
broad shoulders… Jared stood outside the bathroom, the intensity of the look in
Jensen’s eyes intimidating, causing him to even glance back over his shoulder to see
if there was someone behind him to make Jensen go so stony quiet.
“Erm…” Jared began, not really knowing what to say, a blush rising on his cheeks,
his hand going to touch his hair to pull it forward over his face. Jensen was there in
an instant, catching the hand midway.
“Leave the hair het-boy,” he managed to force out, “let’s go.”
The journey was made in an uncomfortable silence, Jared driving and both men lost
in their own thoughts ad they headed straight to the centre of Dallas itself, the skyline
closer, the buildings taller, the apprehension in both men darker and more pervasive.
When they reached the venue they left the car and the next five minutes was a blur
of holding hands, exchanging small demonstrative kisses and accepting
congratulations from TV and tabloid journalists alike.
It was a sit down meal, but there was a lot of standing around time, which meant they
could mingle as much as they wanted. Which was more like Jared mingling and
Jensen doing the whole hanging round the drinks area bit. When dinner was served
Jared was sat next to his husband watching as he picked at the plate before him.
“Jensen, aren't you hungry?” he leaned in close and whispered.
“Yeah, but I'll wait until the meat arrives.” Jensen replied, just as softly.
“Jensen, the salad is the main course. Look, its huge. Seriously, there's no meat
coming.” There was a shot of amusement in his words.
“You've got to be fucking kidding me. You're joking right?” Jensen looked horrified,
which only added to Jared’s amusement levels.
“Hardly. You don't need meat at every meal.” Jared offered, forking another bite of
salad into his mouth and inwardly agreeing with Jensen that it was certainly lacking
something.
Jensen was quiet for all of ten seconds, and then he couldn’t hold in his opinion one
second more, ”are you really a Texan? I mean, really? Jared, I’d put bacon around
an aspirin if I have a headache before I take it.” Jared just smirked and shook his
head, distracted by a conversation to the left and leaving Jensen to pick morosely
through the salad leaves and unidentifiable chunks of vegetable swimming in some
kind of oil, wondering if they could stop at McDonalds on the way back to the
apartment.
Dinner over they separated, Jensen back to the drinks, nursing a whisky, only his
second that evening, Jared doing the whole Padalecki thing, Jensen watching.
Watching and growing more and more irritated at the whole simpering woman falling
all over his husband, touching his husband, touching Jared’s body, his hair, like he
was some sort of... and not only that but the bastard seemed to be enjoying it if his
open smile was anything to go by, and he wasn’t exactly pushing them away. The
itch of irritation grew and twisted until finally enough was enough and the final straw
was seeing Rachel Adams, an ex of Jared’s that clearly wanted some kind of
reunion. Watching her brush past his property, her hands low against Jared’s crotch
and that was it. In a few quick strides he was at Jared’s side, cutting in between
Rachel, vacuous blond number four and simpering brunette number three and
smoothly separating Jared from their clutches with a polite excuse me, guiding him
across and out of the main room and into the darkened corridor before Jared could
protest.
Jensen paced, Jared stood, Jensen fumed, and Jared waited.
Finally Jared just said what he thought Jensen probably needed to hear, “I was just-“
He didn’t get to finish, Jensen crowding him against the wall, and shit Jared was
getting tired of feeling pushed around like this, Jensen just made him feel like this
naughty kid and damn if it wasn’t getting to him. Jensen’s hand went south as quick
as you could say holy shit. Unerringly locating Jared’s dick in his loose dress pants,
Jensen grabbed it forcefully and leaned close to Jared’s ear, hearing the quick
indrawn breath from his husband, a spark of lust flashing through his own body as he
contemplated what to do next. Finally he decided, tired of all the pussy footing
around.
"Jared, you know who this belongs to? This belongs to me.” He gentled the touch
twisting his hand, “I saw you flirting and sharing with those girls out there, and I am
telling you now I don't share. No one else gets to see your dick. No one else gets to
touch it. No one else gets to taste it. Just me. It's mine for one whole year, and i have
the contract to prove it.” Jared tried to form a reply, shame rising in him as his
traitorous dick started to harden against Jensen’s hand, “don't worry, though,
husband, I'm gonna treat it so good. I'm gonna make it, and you, feel so good, that
you’ll never look at another woman again. You only have to say the word.” His voice
fell into a heated whisper, the words low and drawled. “Now do we need to get out of
here, because I think I might need to take you home and show you who you belong
to.” Jared’s eyes widened, his dick fully hard, iron against Jensen’s clever freaking
hands, “I can make you scream. You wouldn’t even know your name when I finished
with you.”
“Jensen… please…” Jared’s voice was broken, the darkness of the hallway inviting
sin.
“Please what?”
Jared blinked, unconsciously pushing his groin against Jensen’s hand, the smell of
Jensen around him, it was not a decision he made with his brain, “lets get the hell out
of here."
They took the back door, in the car within the space of minutes, neither saying
anything, but Jared so fucking hard, knowing Jensen was just as hot for this…
They only made it half way home, something unspoken pushing Jared to pull off of
the road into a parking area, an empty parking area, the engine silent for mere
seconds before Jensen was there, pulling Jared away from the wheel pushing him
down and flatter. His lips were stealing kisses and bites, both lost in the wet
uncoordinated kisses that they were exchanging like air, Jensen’s hands at Jared’s
dress slacks, ripping at the zip and the button, encouraging Jared to lift his hips. It
was messy, it was fast and uncoordinated, hands replaced with mouth in the quickest
movement Jared had ever seen. Jensen’s mouth was sucking him down, his strong
hands alternating between jacking him off and moving to cup his balls, gently, then
firmer. Intense needy noises left Jared’s open mouth, his hands flailing to catch hold
of something, anything.
Two weeks of lust that had built inside them, two weeks of teasing and unrestrained
touching was enough to have orgasm curling at the base of Jared’s spine, the slick
spit wet of Jensen’s warm mouth, his fingers brushing behind and it was all too much.
Fisting his hand in his mouth Jared arched into the heaven of Jensen’s tongue and
teeth, losing it fast and uncontrolled, his vision whiting. Jensen swallowed and tasted,
lifting his mouth with a lewd pop and pushing his own slacks open, his wet slick
hands jacking himself off and curling into Jared as, ropes of come decorated his
hand and Jared’s jacket. Jensen’s pupils were blown, only a thin strip of hazel
obvious in the dark, as he brought his come covered hand up to Jared’s mouth,
pushing the spider web of white inside on shaking fingers and leaning for an open
kiss. The taste and texture of his come was mixed with the taste of Jared’s skin,
breathing heavily against each other as Jensen heaved himself up and away leaning
against the opposite side of the cab, Jared lying immobile his face stone in shock.
Fuck.
So much for no sex for a year
...
Chapter 10
Jensen didn’t know what to say. He really had no idea that his teasing and prodding
and then the whole grabbing his husband’s dick would end with possibly the hottest
most intense sexual experience of his life. He blinked steadily at Jared, who was
pushed way over the other side of the seat, silent and still, shock carved onto his
feline features. The tension in the space was palpable, almost as if Jensen could
hear Jared’s heart beating a frantic rhythm in his chest. He watched in fascination as
Jared wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, looking down at it like he could
see evidence of what Jensen had just done, of what they had just done.
“You’re not gay,” Jensen finally said, quite proud of his achievement in stringing
together those three words. Jared said nothing at first, just blinked steadily.
Finally he simply said, “I pulled over the car.” Like that explanation was enough of
why he wasn’t running to the hills screaming.
“Clearly your dick was more than a little interested then.” Jensen pointed out, wincing
as he spoke and watched a frown collect on Jared’s face.
“This is serious,” Jared snapped, “I’m obviously having some sort of no sex rule
breakdown.”
“After two weeks?” Jensen sounded incredulous.
“More like three.” Jared replied thoughtfully, looking over at a half dressed Jensen,
his shirt pulled high, Texas brown skin and freckles, laid out in front of him, and he
cursed that he wanted to lean over and taste.
”So let me get this straight,” Jensen finally said, “you have gone without sex for three
whole weeks and it has all of a sudden, overnight, turned you gay?” As he spoke he
straightened his clothes, and subtly moved to his knees to lean over to the man he
now had trapped between him and the door. He could smell Jared, the smell of his
cologne, the smell of arousal, the smell of sex, and he leaned in until his lips were
mere millimeters from hazel skin that stretched across high cheekbones, his breath
hot against that skin. He didn’t say anything, just hovered, waited… hesitated.
Outside, the dry storm that had been threatening all day, broke with startling
brilliance. A shaft of lightning tore the air in two outside the SUV, illuminating hazel
green with a flash of desire hidden inside. It startled both men, Jared moving subtly,
Jensen’s lips touching skin.
He could feel the full body shudder, the neediness in the small unconscious noise
that originated in Jared’s throat, and he began to move his lips, slowly, placing small
open mouthed kisses across cheekbones, across lids that closed against the touch,
down to soft lips that parted on a sigh. Jensen slanted his mouth, the rough taste of
tongues sliding, of teeth nipping and tugging at full lips, his dick hard. He wanted so
much of this man… it felt wrong. Gently he eased back, needing to say something,
the lightening flashing around the cab and uncertainty lit into Jared’s eyes. Jensen
sighed, resting his forehead against Jared’s, how was it that a man who blackmailed
him, who gave him no option but to marry him, for reasons that to Jensen made no
sense… how was it that the feelings inside Jensen, were all about lust and need,
when they should have been about hate and revenge.
“We need to talk.” Jensen started, “we can work this out, you are not gay, we’ll get a
second bed, look after the apartment ourselves… I can keep my hands off you… this
was alcohol, nothing more…”
”I didn’t drink anything,” Jared replied quietly… and was that disappointment curling
in his chest at Jensen’s words? It certainly felt like it.
”But I did, and I took advantage of you.” He went to move back but Jared grabbed at
his arm to stop him.
Jared looked down at himself, at 220lb of muscle and height and then over to
Jensen, who despite being solid as a rock and only three inches shorter, was
probably an even match to Jared.
“I’m not some fainting prom date, some girl that you have forced yourself on. Believe
me, if I hadn’t wanted it, then you wouldn’t have got it.” Jared finished the sentence
with steel determination in his voice, more like the man Jensen had expected.
“Jared,” Jensen sighed again, “I haven’t felt lust to touch and take like that since I
was a horny 16 year old and tryin’ to get into Mike Hollister’s pants.”
“And your point is?” Jared was trying to stay calm even as he released Jensen’s arm
and let the man slide back down into his seat.
“Like I said, we need to talk.”
“Let’s go home then… to talk.” Jared added the last bit on the end, thinking friends
with benefits in his head, his dick swelling in the twisted material of his pants, and his
breathing becoming more shallow. Pulling the material together he fastened the fly
and turned back to the wheel, sliding on his belt and starting the engine. He looked
back over his shoulder at the road behind them, ready to pull out.
“Jared, the storm… I need to check on the horses… can we maybe talk… at the D?”
Jared’s heart twisted at that, the suddenness with which he thought that was a good
idea overwhelming. Just to stand in the scarred kitchen, watching Donna bake,
watching Mac tease her brother, it was like some kind of 1950’s sitcom, surreal and
warm.
“Yeah,” Jared simply said, and U-turned away from the Padalecki home and on to the
D. It felt good to just be driving, his skin prickling from the electric in the air, his head
full to bursting with what had just happened. That he had let Jensen do that, taken
him to the edge, that loss of control was overwhelming and new.
They were lost in thoughts, neither said a word, anticipation thrumming in veins as
they neared the D, the only sound the muffled curse when Jared had to swerve to
avoid a dark SUV barreling the opposite way down the unlit road. He cursed
something along the line of slandering the parentage of out-of-towners. It made
Jensen smile to hear the real emotion in Jared’s voice, to hear the man inside,
instead of the slick city businessman that he showed the world.
They turned onto the D, the same pride washing over Jensen as they passed under
the curved D’s and begun the mile trek to the main house, the SUV cushioning them
from most of the potholes, and Jensen stretching each muscle, thinking on the
horses in the barns and how they may be reacting to the electricity of the storm.
Solo-Cal was only a week away from foaling, just one run of seven days, and he
knew his baby was restless in storms. He hoped Jared understood if he suggested
that he had to sleep in there with them tonight.
The flicker on the horizon as the dark buildings started to loom in front of them was
nothing more than a reflection of lightening, Jensen was sure of it. Until it grew
stronger, whiter, steadier, against the dark sky, and suddenly dread trickled down his
spine like ice water.
Before Jared had even stopped the car Jensen was out, screaming against the wind
and the heat, “call 911, get the girls out of the house, then lean on the horn.”
The main barn was on fire.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The fire was a living breathing thing, climbing wood, destroying feed, devouring
everything in it’s path, and Jensen didn’t hesitate, diving into the new flames, before
the fire took hold, and sprinting the length to the stalls where both Solo-Cal and
Taylor-Wood were quivering in the stalls, fear in their whinnies, fire reflecting in wide
staring eyes. He thought he could hear the noise of the car horn, knew that would call
the hands to help, but for now he needed to get his babies out. Dodging debris that
hissed and spat, soaked in fire, he grabbed at Taylor, pulling the terrified horse out of
the stall, running, dragging her to the open air and pushing her to the fence. Mac was
there, “tie her off, away from here,” he shouted over the noise of the storm and the
hungry fire, and then he jumped back over fallen wood and feed, racing the fire to his
other horse.
Solo was way back, her flanks heaving, her eyes rolling, hooves scrabbling, her
whinnies more like screams of fear, and Jensen knew better than to just run in, fire or
no fire. Slowly he moved towards her, ducking as she swung wildly, his voice as low
as he could make it so it could still be heard. She flattened her ears to her head,
teeth bared, and he reached for the halter, getting a firm hold and encouraging her
past fire that reached them with heat and sparks. All the time he focused on the exit,
which was no more that twenty feet in front of them through the smoke. They were
almost there… so very close… as part of the upper floor cracked and split and
tumbled in front of them.
Trapped.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared stood helplessly by the SUV, watching as Donna and Mac exited the house,
Mac immediately going to the barn and hovering, taking delivery of one of the horses
from a smoke-black Jensen, relief piling through him like he couldn’t believe at the
sight of his unmarked husband.
Donna took over the car horn, asking him to go and help Mac, that she needed
someone to help. Jared didn’t argue, sprinting the short distance between the SUV
and the fence, where Mac was tying of the horse; which one Jared didn’t know, only
knowing the horse was clearly frightened, bucking and twisting and pulling at the tie.
Mac was preoccupied, didn’t see as the horse twisted, Jared pushing her aside even
as 1000lbs of horse crushed him back against the solid wooden fence, pushing the
air from his lungs, and almost immediately dancing away. Mac pulled on the halter,
finishing the tie and pulling at Jared’s arm, “get away from her.” She shouted over the
wind, and he pulled himself away from the fence, his vision blurred, sucking in smoke
filled air.
“Jensen?” Mac was screaming, standing as close to the barn as she could and
shouting her brothers name. Dodging flying hooves, Jared crossed to the barn,
seeing nothing but fire and smoke, hearing nothing but the death rattle of fire.
Nothing was escaping the fire that night, whatever, whoever, was inside that inferno,
was surely dead? There was no point in risking his own life, it would be a futile
gesture, one that would mean nothing if both of them died…
What pushed Jared into the flames he would never understand, not in the life he lived
now anyway. What made him walk into the wall of smoke was instinct, and, ignoring
every word Mac was screaming he ran into the barn shouting Jensen’s name. He
remembered from the last visit that the horses were at the back, past the debris that
collected and effectively blocked the exits. Gut feeling pushed him to the left, using a
loose door to divert the fire, coughing as his bruised lungs tried to circulate oxygen
around his body, eyes streaming with smoke forced tears. He couldn’t see anything,
couldn’t touch anything, the heat burning into him, intense and sharp, until finally he
could hear the screams of the terrified horse, see Jensen fighting her, and he moved
to help, a hand strong against Jensen’s arm, letting him know he was here. He led
the horse away from the flames and to the path he had cleared; a path that was
already in decay even as they hesitated. Even though he couldn’t see a path, Jared
was pulling them both, his face lost to the smoke, he knew he had to trust Jared
knew the path to take. It took both of them, Jensen pulling on one side, Jared the
other, until finally the smoke spat Jensen and Solo out into the Texas storm, Jared
just behind him as they switch turned in the chaos.
“Jared… where’s Jared…” Mac was screaming something, her voice grabbed away
by the wind and now the rain that was falling in blessed sheets from above. Startled
Jensen looked back, he couldn’t see Jared. Riley, his main hand, stumble fell to their
side, helping Mac to tie Solo to the fence, and ignoring grabbing hands and
screamed words, Jensen ran back to pull at Jared, who lay still and unmoving just
inside the burning debris, his sleeve alight. An unconscious Jared, flames licking
closer and closer, and he smothered the fire on his husbands arm, using every ounce
of strength to pull him free of the burning barn, the rain cool and heavy against burnt
skin.
It was chaos, the fire department arriving as the last flames were flickering and dying
in the rain, the paramedics lifting Jared into the ambulance, the lights flashing
randomly in the inky blackness that was night.
The fire department waiting, damping down what needed to be done, the lightning
damage so instant, so complete, so devastating, only a twisting shell of black wood
standing as testament to the stables Jensen had built. They muttered that the rain
was lucky, even as the fire had reached destructive arms for the main house the rain
had extinguished the exterior fire. It had saved the two men… that rain…
Mac stood silently, a protective hand across her belly, her daughter a simple kick
inside, and she knew. The rain may have saved the house. But Jared had saved
Jensen… and Jensen saved him right back.
It was Donna that lifted the phone, Donna who breathed with relief when Megan
answered the phone… it’s your brother, there’s been an accident.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The hospital was quiet; casualty was empty apart from a few at home accidents and
Jared.
There was only one person here for Jared Ackles-Padalecki, his sister Megan.
Megan who sat in disbelief at her brother’s side, the pain in her heart overwhelmed
only by the pain in her head.
Your brother has internal bleeding
He needs blood
His blood type is A Rhesus negative… accident on the highway… used our
reserves… we have some flying in… but we need to operate soon… can you
donate?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sherri Padalecki did what every rich trophy wife did, she lied. She wasn’t going to
lose her status or her money, and the promise she had made twenty-seven years
ago when she held her new baby in her arms would not be broken now. Accident or
no accident.
She listened as Megan explained, “… so we need blood mom, you need to come to
the hospital, and you need to get tested for a match.”
The phone had gone quiet, and then her father’s voice was in her ear.
“Megan?”
”It’s Jared daddy, he’s in the hospital, he’s badly hurt… in a fire… he needs blood…
daddy please help.”
Gerald looked at his wife, at the stretched skin on her face, at the diamonds in her
ears, and the vacant expression in her eyes. Hate built inside him, they had
promised, made a deal, her silence, his support for the bastard son, the result of
many one-night stands and affairs from his untrained wife.
Now he had her leashed, had done since the day she had agreed to pass Jared off
as his son. He wasn’t about to run to save Jared, actually it solved quite a few
problems for him to go away quietly and die somewhere. It was certainly a solution to
dividing out the business, the problem that had been plaguing him for some time. It
was just such a shame that the brains of TexOil, the one son of his that had the
instinct for oil, wasn’t even his own blood. Fury and temper flooded him as he
listened to Megan begging for him to come save her beloved brother, talking about
rare blood types, and antigens, and then he just lost it.
How could he delay going? What excuse could he use? He knew damn well he
wouldn’t be a match for Jared even if he did go. He wanted to turn around and say,
well good luck finding a match Megan, I hope your mom is a match, ‘cos he sure as
hell doesn’t share my blood. but he didn’t. He said nothing, simply handing the phone
back to Sherry who assured Megan they would try and get there as soon as
possible… if they could… maybe…
She looked at her husband, the only sign of her anxiety a faint trembling in her right
hand, and he looked right back, his eyes hard and cold.
“They’ll find out,” she said, her voice low and tremulous.
“Not if he dies they wont,” Gerald said in a dry matter of fact manner, turning back to
his book and sipping on his expensive whisky, “lets face it, you should have
terminated him when you found out you were pregnant but didn’t know which one of
many men could have been the father.”
“Gerald - ”
“Enough Sherry, enough.”
She slipped, like the ghost she was, up to their rooms, her heart, what was left of it,
in pieces. Her son. The one good thing that came out of her plan to escape, so many
years before, and now he was dying. She wished she loved Jared, so many times
when she heard the hate in her own voice, looked at him as he grew tall and strong
she regretted the act she needed to keep up. She regretted it until the best
champagne numbed the senses, until her money gave her prestige, until the
Padalecki name gave her safety. Then there was no regret.
Still there was one thing she could do to give her son a fighting chance. If he needed
the rare blood, if the hospital was right, then Jared’s father needed to know. Contrary
to what Gerald believed, there had only been one man that fall of 1981, one man that
had loved her, a young intern in TexOil who had worshipped the very ground she
walked on. Had shown her love.
She dialed the number she knew and he answered on the third ring.
“It’s me,” was all she said, “Jared needs you.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It was nearly two hours since the fire, and Jensen half ran into the ER sliding to a halt
next to Megan who was hunched uncomfortably on the hard plastic chairs in the
family room, Mac following him a little more sedately.
“I hadta get the horses safe… fuck I’m sorry… is he OK… what’s happening
Megan?”
Megan lifted tear filled eyes to his, seeing cuts and abrasions to his face, blood on
his shirt. She could hardly string the words together, fear twisting her inside, “I don’t
know, he’s in theatre, they… needed blood…his blood type…” she shook her head,
confused, exhausted, in shock, assumed her mom and dad were somewhere in the
hospital, because they had the blood they needed, “we wont know for a while…”
Jensen pulled her in for a quick hug, his clothes heavy with smoke and then walked
to the desk, asking questions, demanding answers. Mac moved closer to Megan, her
hand instinctively curling around the other girl’s shoulder.
“They needed blood? How much had he lost?” Jensen’s voice tailed off.
“I don’t know… he had internal bleeding… mom and dad had to be tested… they
must have donated.” Jensen nodded; it was times like this that a family pulled
together. It was good to see that despite their obvious problems that at the end of the
day the Padalecki’s knew that family was family. A sob left her and she murmured
one word, Jared.
“I know that he saved my life.” Mac started softly, wanting to distract Megan from her
grief, “and then he went and saved Jensen’s”. Megan leaned into the embrace.
“Can you tell me what happened?” she asked, glancing at the clock, at the twentytwo minutes since her unconscious brother had been wheeled into theatre, and
needing to know why he was there. So Mac started to explain. Explain how Jared
had pushed her away and taking the brunt of the bucking horse, how he had run into
the flames after Jensen.
For what had happened to the brother she adored, Megan could only cry.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The Vet leaned over worriedly. Taylor-Wood had settled OK, but Solo wasn’t doing
so well.
Labour had started. Too early.
They could lose this foal.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared blinked at the white, the complete white around him, and murmured words
reassured him.
“Jared? Mac can you get the doctor?”
Jared shuddered, his last memory was of Jensen disappearing into the flames, and
he desperately tried to pull at memories just out of reach. Lifting his husband’s head
Jensen offered him a straw for water and encouraged Jared to sip slowly.
“Jen..sen… the horses?”
“The horses are fine,” Jensen offered, his heart breaking even as he lied, the Vet’s
call with the bad news about possibly losing both the foal and the momma still loud in
his head.
“Jared…” his sister’s voice from behind Jensen.
“Meg,” a simple word, but reaching out he touched her hand, and she curled it into
his larger hand, tears rolling free down her face, “S’OK Meggie,” he reassured, his
throat tight with smoke.
Jensen watched the interaction between brother and sister, the absence of parents
and brother telling him more than he knew. How could they donate blood yet not
come to see their son, when their son had almost died? It was all Jensen could do
not to lean in and hug Jared, at the vulnerable look on his face before Meg had called
his name. He didn’t though. He didn’t lean in to say thank you, to kiss Jared, to
reassure him. Damn it. He wanted too.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“No one will know it wasn’t the storm,” Jeff said simply.
"So we can guarantee the end of the whole horse business for the Ackles then? Do
you really think this will be enough?" Gerald was curious as to how this plan of Jeff’s
was going to work.
“It’s simple, the barn will be gone, along with Jensen's dreams and his two brood
mares. Given that the pre-nup gives him no money inside of the marriage or after
divorce, he'll crumble, we'll slip in, work that vulnerability, offer him money to help…”
“Then he'll agree to our terms,” Gerald interrupted, “We can expose his husband for
the pale excuse for a Padalecki that he is, arrange an annulment, end of the
problem.”
Jeff nodded, almost eagerly, “Jared doesn’t fulfill the terms of the contract you drew
up as divorce or annulment cancels the contract, I get to keep my controlling
percentage, and younger brother learns his place.”
“Yes Jeff, that he does.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Can I ask how my son is doing?” the man asked gruffly, his voice still thick with
unshed tears and a grief cutting deep into his heart.
“He is still in surgery sir, would you like to go up with the rest of the family, I can take
you?”
Jeffrey Dean Morgan stood silent for a while, looking down at the papers he had
signed, and then back at the understanding face of the blood bank nurse. He
coughed. He couldn’t handle sympathy or understanding at the moment, it may well
push him over the edge.
“No. It wouldn’t be…” JD searched for the right word, “…appropriate,” he finally
offered. “I’ll wait here for news.”
He had known.
In his heart he had known all this time that Jared was his. It was the only reason why
he stayed at TexOil, so he could watch his son grow into the man that he was so
proud of.
He had known.
Chapter 11
Megan didn’t know what to say to Chad, even as she dialled his number with shaking
fingers, she knew for some reason Chad and Jared had argued, over what she didn’t
know, but hell, he needed to know his best friend was hurt, and jeez, Mac looked
dead on her feet.
“You can go if you want,” Megan had said to the slim woman who stood at her side,
“I’ll be OK.”
“You’re family, I stay.” Mac had replied simply, warmth in her hazel green eyes so
like Jensen’s. It made Megan blink tears, to hear those simple words, it was a long
time since the family she knew did anything except fight and scheme and destroy.
Even Jared had lost it along the way, changing every day that TexOil had him in their
clutches, becoming harder, more determined to win at all costs. It scared her and to
have Mac next to her, with unconditional support, asking for nothing in return, it was
easy to drift into a place where people cared about her and Jared.
She thumbed through the contacts to find Chad’s number, his familiar yo Megs a jolt
to her heart. She had always wondered why he put up with the shit that the Padalecki
family dumped on him, the meals where comments were made on his lifestyle, where
his heart condition was laid out for discussion in cold hard facts, the times that Jared
just dragged him away upstairs. Still he stayed. He visited for Jared, he was really
Jared’s only friend, and that was an incredibly sad state of affairs. Meg was of the
opinion that Gerald Padalecki liked his son friendless, it was just another escape that
was pulled away from his middle child in the never-ending vitriolic criticism that was
heaped on her brother.
“Meg?” Chad’s voice was puzzled, Meg wasn’t usually this silent, and given it was
four in the morning this wasn’t right, “Meg, you’re scaring me babe, where are you?”
“Chad… it’s Jared… there’s been an accident… he’s… I need you… Mac needs
you… can you come Chad?” There was no hesitation in Chad’s voice, argument or
not, Meg asked him… and for Mac…
“Are you at Mercy?
“Yes”
“I’ll be there in ten,” the phone went silent in her ear and she pulled it away watching
as the call ended message flashed on the screen, meeting Mac’s eyes. Eyes full of
compassion and understanding, and suddenly she couldn’t take any more. They had
said it would be another hour at least, that it could be many more than that, and she
needed air, needed to breathe.
“I’ll get coffee,” she said simply, and before Mac could touch her, or say a thing, she
fled the family room.
“He is all she has,” Jensen offered quietly, encouraging his sister to come sit with
him, offering her his arm to lean on, “at the house… there is no one for Megan except
for Jared, and the same for Jared, he only has Megan.”
“That is really sad,” Mac said softly, her hand on her belly, reassuring herself it was
all OK, “to have no one left.”
The door swung open, a dishevelled Josh standing in the doorway, his eyes frantic to
see Jensen, relief so obvious as it washed over him and Jensen stood, pulling Mac
with them until the three stood in an embrace so close it was difficult to know where it
started and where it ended. Donna stood in the doorway, her heart in her throat,
seeing her children, there for each other, together, sadness inside her that Alan
never saw this, never saw that she had chosen him, that love was enough for her,
that she didn’t need money and prestige and a name that mattered in the pages of
the Dallas Times. For all their issues it was times like these when she missed her
husband and his wide smile, missed the start of their relationship when they had love
and affection and had run away to marry, conceiving Josh in a small no-tell motel
outside the Vegas main strip. Her eyes went to Mac, it wasn’t right that Josh was the
only one of them that didn’t know she was expecting. He needed to know. They were
a family.
“Mac?” the siblings pulled apart, each one with faces wet with tears, but stronger for
having each other. “It seems like maybe we should share your news with Josh?”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Megan rounded the corner, hot coffee in her insulated vending machine cup,
unconsciously heading for the blood bank. Her parents may be crap, her family may
be dysfunctional, but one of them, either her ice-cold mom or her scarlet tempered
dad, had donated the blood that Jared needed. There had to be some kind of
redemption there. What she found in the blood bank was not what she expected, but
it pleased her to see the man she called Uncle to be standing with a similar cup of
coffee in his hand.
“Hi Uncle J,” she said, her spirits lifting, watching as he looked over, blinking steadily,
a look of shock on his face.
“Meg,” he said so soft she had to strain to hear, and then he held out his arms and
she cuddled in to the familiarity of the man who let her colour pictures in his office,
who had been her show and tell project at little school on the grand total of three
occasions, the man who had taught her to ride a bike, build a tree swing and braid
her hair.
“Is daddy here?” she asked into his soft T-shirt, her nose tickling at the splitting logo
on the front, something to do with his beloved Football she assumed, leaning back in
his arms to look past his salt and pepper beard to his lips, pressed together in a
harsh line, his eyes full of something… something that almost looked like fear…
remorse…
“No Meg, your father isn’t here.”
”Mom then?”
“No,”
”So they left?” Meg was bewildered, surely… they would have at least spoken to
someone about Jared? Stayed to see he was OK? Megan felt the sigh run through
him, the rise and fall of his chest under her hands, and she dropped them to rest on
his arms, touching something… a plaster… a pad…
Eyes widening she looked up at him, shock in them. Shock and sudden, instant,
realisation.
”They were never here Megan… never here.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Josh sat back on his seat, his mouth open in an ‘O’ of surprise. “Expectin’?” he
parroted what she had just said, paling as she nodded. “Your heart Mac…” he was
only saying what everyone else had said to her.
“I’ve seen a specialist, it can be OK.” She offered helplessly, knowing what he
needed to hear, that his little sister was going to be fine, just couldn’t be said.
“Can be OK?” Josh stood, “who… who did this to you?” he finally said, startled as
Jensen stood to stand between them, ever the pacifier in their sibling rows.
”She wont say Josh, and we shouldn’t push it.” There was fire in Jensen’s eyes, fire
and determination for the matter to be laid to rest. Josh simply nodded; there was
time for details later, when paternity tests could be carried out with no room for error.
Jensen took a step back, trusting the elder brother to do the right thing, and in one
smooth movement Josh had pulled Mac into him for a hug, and was saying the things
she needed to here…
Releasing her he pulled Jensen info a bear hug, and then stood back, “It’s about time
we get to share being an Uncle!”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The Vet sat back on his haunches, wiping sweat and blood from his face, the battle
for life in his hands. She was alive, the tiny mewling foal, covered in mucous and
Solo was trying her hardest to clean her baby off, but exhaustion and fear was
fighting her instinct and the Vet was in, helping her, scraping away the barriers to
breath, a smile on his face.
He was so proud of Solo, and he praised her with touches and murmured words,
Riley standing opposite with a goofy grin on his face.
“Can I phone Jensen… will the foal be OK?”
“Usual provisos Riley, the foal is strong but prem, and she’ll need some care… but
yeah, looks like Solo’s injuries are minimal as well.” Riley jogged out of the stable,
already pulling his cell out of his pocket, and the vet watched him go. Today, sat here
at five in the morning, covered in sweat and blood… today was a good day to work
with horses.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen closed the cell, a smile on his face that belied the worry he was feeling about
his husband. One piece of good news, momma and baby doing well
“Mr Ackles-Padalecki?” the nurse stood at the door, looking expectantly from Josh to
Jensen.
“Me…” Jensen replied, standing and crossing to her, “Is he OK?”
“If you come with me, the surgeon would like to talk to you.” glancing back at his
family, strengthening in their support he followed her to the side room where a man
stood, hardly older than him. It was a blur…
... everything went well… nicked an artery… blood transfusions from his father…
unconscious… sleep…”
“Can I see him?” Can I just touch him and maybe check he is still alive?
“The nurse will take you through as soon as he is situated in care, do you have any
further questions?” Jensen blinked, he had hundreds... what happened, why did
Jared push Mac out of the way, run into the fire, but none that he had to ask to
surgeon. So thanking him and shaking his hand he turned to follow the nurse who
babbled on about having someone famous in the OR and the last time that had
happened it had been some bit actor off of Dynasty, way, way back. Jensen half
listened, apprehension rising in him, wondering if he should go back and get Josh, or
his mom, just to… to what… hold his hand… for god sake…
The door opened, he listened as she said not to look too closely, that the tubes were
for a reason, that he was out of any danger, that it went well, until finally he was
there, stood next to his husband’s bed, looking down at the tall man, impossibly pale
against the white sheets. He didn’t look hurt, every sign of the injury he received
hidden under sheets and bandages, he just looked peaceful, his hair pushed back
from his face, his eyelids shut, and his lips parted in sleep. Sighing he traced a finger
from forehead to throat, gently touching each mole, each inch of skin, wondering how
he was going to talk to this man when he finally opened his eyes.
Scooting a chair closer he slumped into it. He was here for the long haul.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Uncle J?” Meg’s voice was broken, the realisation hot and heavy in her heart, and
her eyes searched his, looking for some kind of denial or question.
“I think we should sit down Megan,” JD said simply, guiding her to sit and half turning
towards her. “I’ve wanted to tell him for so long,” so much to say…
“Is it true… are you Jared’s father? Are you my father?” There was hope in the
second question. Maybe if it turned out JD was her father then that could explain how
dad was with her, ignoring her, cutting her down at every turn…
JD cupped her face in strong capable hands, “oh baby, you don’t know how much I
wish I was.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Chad took the stairs, too impatient to wait for the elevator, bursting into the family
area in a flurry of early morning air and panic. He sought Mac, found her, pulling her
close in a frenzied hug, then leaning back, looking at her pale face and biting off the
need to push her into a bed to sleep.
”Talk to me,” he ordered swiftly, half turning to Josh, looking for answers.
“There was a fire at the D,” Mac started.
“Are you OK? Mac? Are you OK? Is the baby OK?” Chad looked down at her belly,
and back up at her beautiful eyes, drowning in the depths of tear bright green.
Mac smiled softly, shaking her head. “I’m fine… it isn’t me… its Jared. He was hurt
quite bad.”
“How bad, I mean you said surgery, is he out of surgery yet?”
“They took Jensen out to talk, I think it’s gonna be OK, the nurse smiled.” This from
Josh who stood to one side, his face twisted in a frown as he looked from Chad to
Mac and back again.
“I guess what goes around comes around,” Chad finally offered to the conversation
on a sigh, pulling Mac close, vowing to never let her out of his sight again.
She pulled back, and looked up into his blue eyes, “no Chad, you don’t understand,
Jared saved me from injury and probably saved the baby’s life, and then he went in
and got Jensen out. Chad, whatever you argued about, whatever made you hate
him, he was a hero.”
“Mac he…” Chad stopped, hearing what his friend had done, stopping the words on
his lips, the words that would damn Jared in front of his husband’s family, and he
couldn’t say them, couldn’t even begin to string them together. “OK, OK, shall we get
you home eh?” he looked at Josh who nodded his approval, “I’ll take her back to my
apartment,” he confirmed, kissing away the dissent in Mac’s voice and clutching at
her hand. “Will you let us know?”
Josh said he would, crossing to close the door behind them and turning back to
Donna who sat quietly to one side, observing everything that was happening with a
careful eye.
“Is Chad the dad?” Josh asked of his mom, wanting the honest truth.
“She is saying nothing, but no, in my heart I don’t think it is Chad, I am not sure how
their relationship has evolved, but no, it isn’t Chad.”
Josh seemed mollified and subsided back into silence, crossing his legs and pulling
at a magazine, covering a yawn behind wide hands. So not Chad then… so who was
it then…
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Megan held out her hand, “you need to come with me… to be with the family.”
Jeff tugged back, “I cant Meg, you don’t understand… your mom and I… we…”
“Just come with me Uncle J… trust me… Jared will want to thank his daddy.” A
million emotions filtered through him at that single word, at the destruction Gerald
could bring down on Jared’s head, at the agreement they had made twenty-seven
years ago.
“I want to Meg…” He stopped, finally tugging his hand through. “… but I wont. Jared
doesn’t have much from his family, apart from you, but at least he has his name, and
that is important to him. I wont destroy that.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared woke to a new day, the light bright, Jensen’s face the first he saw, his husband
leaned back in the chair breathing deeply, stubble lining his face and his hands
crossed across his stomach.
“Jen… sen…” he croaked, his throat raw, watching as Jensen blinked sleep away
and sat upright.
“Hey,” he said softly, standing and pressing the button for the nurse, who arrived to
relieve the minute or so of uncomfortable and embarrassed silence. She bustled
around Jared, lifting the back of his bed and manoeuvring him into a more upright
position, the pain in his chest numbed with meds. She left, which meant only Jensen
and Jared were in the room, alone, with memories and emotions unchecked around
them waiting to be dealt with.
“So, I guess, thank you,” Jensen started, “thank you for coming in to get me, but
mostly for stopping Taylor from hurting Mac. ‘Cos that woulda killed the baby, and
possibly her.”
Jared nodded, half smiled, “better a six four muscle man than an itty bitty girl eh?” he
joked, glancing down at bandages, a flush of embarrassment climbing his face.
Jensen sighed and moved to sit on the side of the bed.
“Don’t discount what you did like that, I couldn’t get Solo out on my own, she was
terrified… and when I got out and you weren’t there…”
“I think I freakin’ fainted,” Jared interrupted crossly, and Jensen almost snorted at the
look of utter self-disgust on Jared’s face.
“Nah, think it more likely you passed out due to the internal bleeding from the nicked
artery,” Jensen pointed out pragmatically, and Jared’s face brightened, that sounded
a lot more manly than fainting.
”Cool.” He finally said, his voice getting more and more scratchy, and his eyelids
starting to droop.
“Hang on,” Jensen said, sliding off the bed and disappearing out of the door, coming
back with people in tow, Meg and Mac and Josh and a very pale Donna. It was
Megan who climbed to curl up next to her brother but it was Donna that the Ackles let
through first, as they crowded around his bed.
”Jared…” she said, leaning over and kissing him on the forehead, “for Mac and
Jensen, thank you.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
When they left, including Jensen who needed to check on his horses, it just left Meg
who remained curled close to her big brother, clinging to the hospital gown, her
knuckles white with the pressure. Jared held her close, not remembering the last time
his confident sassy sister came to him for comfort.
“I think imma gonna be friends with Mac,” she whispered into his chest, “she’s
pregnant, and so sick, did Jensen tell you that?” Jared’s heart twisted with shame,
that his sister was sat here her heart in her voice, and to know what he had done to
Jensen and his sister, it was too much.
“That is good Meg, she needs friends,” he offered instead, his fingers digging into his
sisters long dark hair as if to anchor himself to this world, his sisters world of
innocence where there were no secrets and no lies.
“Jay… I have something I need to talk to you about,” she said quietly, and he shifted
slightly to lean closer, his head spinning a little from the meds. “It’s about the
transfusion… when they brought you in… you needed blood… a lot of blood and they
didn’t have your type match, and mom wasn’t a match, nor me.”
Jared waited for her to say more, to explain the point, then all of a sudden put two
and two together, “dad? Did dad donate the blood?” Megan uncurled herself from his
side, placing her feet flat on the floor.
“Your father donated the blood you needed, he is the one who matched your needs,
only it wasn’t daddy, would never be daddy, cos Jay,” tears choked her voice, she
had to say it but couldn’t think how or what to say, “he isn’t your dad…”
“What do you mean?” Jared looked confused, worried, a frown creasing his forehead.
“JD Jared, JD is your father.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
JD Morgan was not one to mope or sulk, life threw what it wanted and he dealt with
it, from falling in love at 18 with the boss’s wife, to dealing with the devil by signing
away his baby. When Jensen came up next to him with a coffee and a smile and the
simple words, have you been into see Jared, it was enough to make him turn tail and
run and that was hard on his normally calm personality.
“No, no I haven’t…” he stuttered in reply, Jensen frowning, and opening the door he
had been lurking outside,
“Come on in then, he’ll be pleased for the company,” Jensen said simply and walked
inside, seeing Megan curled up again with Jared, her eyes wide and tear filled, Jared
stiff and unyielding and with fury carved into his face. “What’s wrong?” he asked
quickly, dumping his coffee on the table by the door and crossing to Jared, “what’s
happened?”
“Me,” a voice from behind him, JD closing the door and coming to stand next to
Jensen, “me,” he repeated, “I happened,”
Jensen rounded on him, “what the fuck did you do, did Padalecki send you? What
have you done?”
”Jensen wait,” Jared interrupted, encouraging Meg to uncurl and stand away from the
bed. He drew in a breath, looking at JD, seeing how he couldn’t look back at Jared,
seeing the friend he thought he had, the one man he could rely on.
“Jared - ” JD began, but Jared waved a hand, No
“I just cant believe it,” he started, turning his head away from them all, JD moving
closer, his head hearing the anger in Jared’s voice, his heart denying it was there.
Jared turned back, his eyes wet with tears, and the spark of something. Something
real, possibly Jared’s first ever real emotion, a single smile. “All along I thought it was
me you know, I thought i wasn’t good enough, strong enough or smart enough, that
that was the reason Gerald Padalecki hated me. But I was wrong. The problem
wasn’t me, it was him, because he knew didn’t he. He knew he wasn’t my father.” He
stopped, the smile still there, it was unnerving and JD didn’t know what to say,
looking to Megan for support as she sidled close to her brother. Sighing, he admitted
defeat, it was right for Jared to know the truth.
“We loved each other Jared, your mom and I, we were going to leave. She used to
have a good heart, was so for her music, her books, and she took me under her
wing, and we just clicked. When she told me she was pregnant, I was the happiest
man alive, you have to believe me.”
Jared dropped the smile, a mask of seriousness falling over his face, “I do JD, I do
believe you, and I want you to know one thing…” he paused, long enough for JD to
insert an encouraging what?.
“JD, I couldn’t be happier.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen helped Jared from the car. Grumpy Jared had long since been replaced by
thank-fuck-I-am-out-of-hospital Jared, and it was with smiles that he climbed the
steps to the Ackles home, Jensen refusing to take him to the Padalecki mansion this
side of hell freezing over. He took the younger man to the back rooms, Jensen’s
rooms, all the while listening to Jared muttering about how he could damn well walk
himself, smiles belying his words.
It was the next day before grumpy Jared came back with a vengeance.
“I am having a freakin shower.”
”Stand up by yourself for more than thirty seconds and the shower is all yours,”
“Fuck you Ackles,” Jared spat out, trying to stand and failing miserably.
“Ackles-Padalecki,” Jensen reminded with a grin, kind of enjoying the whole poorly
Jared thing.
“And I say again, fuck you.”
Jensen took pity, locking the bedroom door, crossing to the bathroom and coming
back with a basin, soap, a cloth and a towel. “Bed bath,” he smirked.
“No freakin way,” Jared shouted, loud enough to be heard through the house, pulling
his covers up round his neck looking, for all the world, like a five year old.
“Bed bath and blow job or nothing.”
Jared slit his eyes, “blow job?” He asked carefully.
“You let me clean you up, you get a hand job or a blowjob, depends how clean I get
ya, I mean I’m cleaning you anyway, no biggie.” Jensen shrugged; like it was every
day he offered, fresh from hospital straight boys, bed baths and blowjobs.
“Jeez Ackles… Padalecki,” he added the other name quickly as Jensen opened his
mouth to correct his husband. Smirking again, enough with the smirking, Jensen
pulled off his jeans and half climbed on the bed to straddle Jared, lifting off his shirt
and exposing acres of Texas tanned skin.
“Ready?” he asked softly…
“Shouldn’t I be the one getting’ naked?” Jared slurred, his dick hard under the covers,
his hands itching to reach for his husband.
“It’s more fun this way, and I tell ya what, don’t overdo it, but where I touch you, you
touch me back, so…” he ghosted a finger over Jared’s T-shirt covered chest,
scratching at the material across his nipple, and pulling his hand back, “now it’s your
turn het-boy,” carefully he placed Jared’s hand against his bare chest, directly over
his heart, and waited. Jared had a frown of concentration on his face that would rival
a pre-schooler in a spelling bee, but moved his fingers slowly, across heated skin
and away from Jensen’s steady heartbeat, to focus on the nipple skimming it gently
before applying pressure. It was powerful to see Jensen arch into his touch, just the
simple touch of fingers to nipple, and he moved his fingers to curl around the other,
the look of concentration replaced by one of uncovered lust.
Jensen touched shoulders, muscles in arms, fingers to fingers, eyes, cheekbones,
each time with the damp cloth and Jared repeated every motion, the heat pooling in
his groin at just exchanging these touches so hot it was burning him. Jensen pulled
back the covers, pushing and pulling at material until Jared lay naked beneath him,
his long limbs stretched out on pristine white sheets, his dick hard and weeping up
against his thigh.
“Stop staring,” Jared breathed, unconsciously twitching his hips as Jensen settled
himself between his legs.
“Freak.” Jensen pointed out, leaning down and gently blowing onto damp skin,
watching as the hairs stood tall and the shiver ran through his lover’s body. “You are
gorgeous,” he said, his voice little more than a growl, “beautiful, and I want to stare,”
all Jared could do was groan at the words, as Jensen bent and took the very end of
his dick between his lips, looking up and direct into Jared’s mouth. He lowered his
head, taking Jared in as far as he could before pulling back and off.
”Wha?” Jared managed to force out.
“Last time we could chalk up to drink, timing, the storm, stress. This time it would be
because we choose it.”
Jared didn’t think it was fair to be handing him this when those freakin hot lips had
just locked round his dick, but he managed to tell Jensen everything he wanted by
curling his fingers in short hair and pulling him back down on his dick, “keep goin’
cowboy.”
Jensen smiled even as he licked a stripe on the underside of Jared dick, laving at the
pearls of pre-come that collected at the tip, remembering the texture, the needy
sounds from Jared’s mouth, his dick so freaking hard in his boxers that it was hurting
for his touch. He spent ages just kissing, licking, biting on his inner thigh, before
Jared’s whines became more forceful, his large hands guiding and pushing Jensen
down and then up, until Jensen got with the freakin plan.
His chest hurt, the bandages pulled as he twisted his head, but he swallowed the
pain, the heat inside him pushing at his spine, he was so close, he wanted Jensen to
touch him like he had before, touching behind, touching… “Touch me,” he ordered,
his voice broken in the demands of lust. He felt Jensen chuckle, felt the vibrations in
his dick, keening and arching as Jensen moved his fingers, just circling, not pushing,
just applying pressure around, until the whole area, every single inch of Jared was on
fire. The pleasure pain was too much and he couldn’t stop himself even if he tried,
trying to tell Jensen in amongst the whimpers of pain, to warn he was about to…
He opened his mouth in a silent scream as orgasm hit him, pumping into Jensen’s
mouth helpless in his needs, Jensen swallowing and sucking, catching him as he fell
to earth, still chuckling as he pulled his mouth off and climbed his lover to exchange a
heated kiss. “Your turn,” he whispered quietly, taking Jared’s hand and placing it on
his dick, Jared’s eyes widening even in the afterglow, as he closed his hand firmly
and started to move it like he would on his own dick, just this side of rough, his thumb
trailing through pre-come every other stroke, twisting and touching and feeling.
Jensen tried to form words for Jared’s first time with him, wanted to reassure him, but
lasted not much longer than twenty strokes, so close after taking Jared to the edge.
Sealing his mouth to Jared’s he tongue fucked his mouth, exchanging heated breaths
and stilling as he came over Jared’s hand, words of passion on his lips that never left
him.
Breathing hard he slumped down next to his sated lover. Talking could wait.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It was the first time Gerald had ever raised a hand to her. A slap that sent her reeling
against the wall and to the floor.
“You told him? Told him to go the hospital… you stupid bitch. We could have sorted
everything without that bastard kid in my life”
He walked away, leaving her dry eyed and shocked on the floor. She hated him for
what he had made her into, and he hated that for a short time she found comfort in
another man’s arms, but their relationship had always been civil at least. A mutually
beneficial marriage, her old money, his new money, how could it go wrong?
Still, she was a mother, with, deeply hidden but still there, mother’s instincts. Inside
somewhere she had love for her son, how could she not save his life? For Sherry
Padalecki this was the point at which she finally died inside, no part of the old Sherry
left. Nothing. The last wrench of that civility in her marriage away from her heart,
leaving her empty.
The pills were easy to find, the doctor had been happy to prescribe sleeping pills over
the last few years, they sat in her bathroom steady and welcoming, and the warnings
on the bottle were always very clear, don’t mix with alcohol.
The whisky, gin and brandy… well they were also very easy to find.
....
Chapter 12
Sherry stared for a long time at the amber liquid in the glass, at the high Texas sun
filtering through the crystal and casting rainbows of design on to the marble top of her
dressing table. The pills lay in her hand, she had counted them, there were twentynine of them, sitting in a small pile, the chalkiness of them strange against her soft
skin. She looked at them carefully and then lifted her eyes to look at her face in the
mirror, nearly unlined, with full makeup, her hair just so, diamonds sparking at her
ears, a necklace flat against her graceful neck. None of it was real, cosmetics and a
surgeon’s knife holding back the years, just to be what others expected, what she
had wanted to be, what she tried so hard to be.
She had never had Gerald’s love, not really, nor that of her eldest son; she had
driven away Jared and had failed Megan. Still this wasn’t the way to deal with these
mistakes or with her despair, she was a strong woman, and generations of women in
her family had been in worse situations than this. Carefully she placed the tablets
back in the bottle and replaced the stopper on the decanter, a stronger determination
in her shaking hands. She had things to do; Gerald needed to know some things.
Kristen needed help. Her daughter needed saving. And as for her middle child, her
beautiful strong man that held so much weight across his shoulders… well he
needed to know the whole truth. She needed to place a call to JD, it was long
overdue.
She wasn’t ready to die today.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff sat in the car for a long time, considering every word he was going to say,
looking at the shell of the burned barn and cursing his idiot brother and that fag
Ackles for what they had managed to do. With the horses surviving, with Ackles able
to carry on with his half bitten excuse for a farm it left the leverage weaker. Still. He
had what Jensen needed, money, and he intended to just go on in and ask. It was
Ackles himself who climbed down the steps from the front door meeting him as Jeff
got out of the car.
“Padalecki,” he said formerly.
“I came to visit my brother,” Jeff replied, enough with the pleasantries.
“He’s sleeping at the moment, if you wanna wait up in the house then you are
welcome.” Please just say no, and then leave.
“Well I have a small piece of business that we could maybe discuss whilst I’m waiting
on him.” Jensen’s eyes narrowed, why would Jared’s older brother want to talk
business with him? Jensen folded his arms and planted his feet in Texas dirt, in hard
baked D soil, his face carefully blank. This was so not being taken into his momma’s
house.
“Go on,” he prompted, watching as Jeff moved towards the house and then stopped
as he realized Jensen was not moving a muscle inside. Well, Jeff decided inwardly,
that was a good thing really, wouldn’t want little brother to find out just yet.
“I have an offer for you,” he started, swagger back in his height as he attempted to
loom over Jensen, who merely blinked at him in return, “I heard about your
unfortunate… incident… with the barn and your horses, damn shame, heard they
were good horses an’ all,”
“They still are good horses, one has foaled, momma and baby doing fine,” Jensen
pointed out. He thought back to the telephone conversation he had just had with the
fire investigator who had categorically stated the fire was arson and not the fault of a
lightning strike. Jeff seemed mighty nervous with all his blustering dominance, and
something somewhere in Jensen’s mind started to connect without even realising.
“As I said, I am very pleased ya’all OK.” Jensen narrowed his eyes, was it just his
imagination or was the man’s words slurring with Texas pushing through the clipped
vowels of his expensive education? A sure sign Jeff was struggling with the wording
of what he was saying, he knew this because Jared did that too. “I wanted to thank
you for what you have done for my little brother, helping him the way you did with the
whole arranged marriage business, and I want you to know that the Padalecki's
always make good on favors. I want to make you an offer on both horses in
exchange for something that wont be a hardship.”
“My horses?” Jensen chose to ignore the reference to arranged marriage; he was so
not going to rise to the subtle innuendo and devious guesswork.
“Ten million dollars for the foals, outright, passing them to me immediately, in
exchange for the money, more than enough I imagine to breed again, all I want from
you is proof of annulment to Jared.”
Silence.
Jensen considered every word Jeff had just thrown at him, then sighed exaggerating
the movement and dropping his hands to his side, his fists clenching and unclenching
as temper started to grow inside him, “an annulment? Do they even do those
anymore?” he finally said, pasting an innocent and enquiring look on his face.
Jeff didn’t seem to see the temper in Jensen’s eyes, or hear the sarcasm in his voice,
and just pushed on. “I know you can’t have consummated… the marriage,” this he
spat out like it was a nasty taste in his mouth, “and I understand why you did it, that
you probably only entered the marriage for money for the ranch. I am more than
willing to match and double whatever Jared agreed to pay you if ten million isn’t
enough. It wont be any loss to you. You sign the papers that I will get written up, and
there it is, end of marriage, and then you can leave my little brother to me, he wont
be your problem any more.”
“Well I’m kinda enjoying having him around,” Jensen responded, deceptively calm.
“You may have to offer more’n ten to buy me out of this one.”
Jeff nodded eagerly. “I can do that, I can push it to fifteen if it is a done deal by the
end of the week.” Jeff could almost sense the deal going down, imagining the control
he would retain at TexOil, the billion-dollar company would swallow fifteen million in a
day.
“Tell you what then,” Jensen moved one step closer, not at all intimidated by the tall
soft-middled business man standing in front of him with the smirk on his face. “You
can take your millions and get the hell of my land.”
Jeff’s mouth fell open, as if he couldn’t have heard right, “Ackles, what the - ”
“Ackles-Padalecki,” Jensen snapped back, some of his control slipping, “Acklesfreakin’-Padalecki and I’ll thank you to remember that from now on.” He took a step
closer, and in an unconscious movement Jeff stepped backwards, and so it went until
he had his back against the car and Jensen stood toe to toe.
Jeff blustered, “he’s not even gay, he’s not a fucking fag, and it’s not real.” The words
tumbled out of Jeff’s mouth in a sudden torrent of anger, “I’ll take this to court and
prove it.”
Jensen leaned even further towards the tall man, trying damn hard not to hit him. “If
you do, then I will bring photographic evidence of me and your brother making love
on every single surface at the Padalecki Mansion, including the bed in your
apartment.” Jensen’s voice was a low contained growl, heavy with intention to make
his point.
Jeff pushed him away, open disgust and disbelief on his face, and climbed into the
car, “fuck you Ackles,” were his parting words before he gunned the engine and
drove off with a squeal of tire and a cloud of dust and debris.
Jensen stood for a while watching as the cloud of dust dissipated, Ackles-Padalecki
he sighed to himself. He didn’t realize he had eyes watching him, Jared standing at
the side window, watching the end of the confrontation, too doped up to do anything
except stand weakly against the sink, the glass of water he had come out for cold in
his hand. He moved away as Jensen looked back at the window, stumbling towards
the table and sitting, waiting for Jensen to come back in, his heart in his throat. He
had heard some of it, just some of the conversation near the house before Jensen
crowded his brother towards the car and out of earshot.
He looked up as Jensen entered the kitchen, waiting for the storm.
“Fifteen million.” Jared stated finally, as Jensen grabbed a beer and slid in the chair
opposite. “You should take the money.”
“I don’t want the money, and I wont pull out now, you stand to lose a lot of money if
you don’t get your percentage.”
Jared sighed quietly, “Jensen, do you have any idea how much I am worth? Even
with just the percentage I have?”
“How far past obscene are we talking?” Jensen asked with a laugh, “I’m guess
mebbe I shoulda asked you for more for the D.”
Jared just nodded, deadly serious, “I can give you more, if you agree to stay
married.” His face was creased with anxiety, his stomach churning, he didn’t even
know what he was saying, he wasn’t sure he even wanted more of TexOil anymore.
How could so much have changed in such a short time, with so many new doubts
circling in his head. If it meant buying the rest of the year with Jensen, just to keep
him in his life. Jesus. How sad did that make him?
“I’m gonna ignore you said that,” Jensen replied, tipping back to swallow down half
the beer in one go.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac slid further into Chad’s hug, as they talked softly, his left hand over hers, feeling
her daughter kick back at the touch, his right hand curled into her long hair, stroking
and soothing gently.
“Mac, can I ask you something and you promise me not to get angry in return?” Chad
felt a full body sigh go through Mac as she buried into his shirt with a soft murmur of
agreement. “The father of your baby… do you love him?” Megan stilled, lifting her
head, hazel green eyes wide with shock.
“No…” she paused, her voice strong and determined, “…I hate him.”
Chad closed his eyes, dropping a small kiss on the top of her head; inhaling the smell
of apple and feeling every muscle in his body relax.
”Can I ask you something else?”
“You’re pushing it Murray,” she said softly, a smile on her face, a smile that gave him
strength.
“Mackenzie, you know I love you, and I hope, in my heart, that one day you could
come to love me too, or at least… jeez… Mac… will you marry me?” He waited, the
seconds grew to a minute, but he didn’t push it, just waited, imagining the reasons,
each slightly wilder than the last, that Mac would give for saying no.
“Yes. Yes Chad I will.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It had been three days since the sponge bath blowjob incident, something that
Jensen hadn’t instigated a repeat of since, much to Jared’s confusion. It had been
good hadn’t it? Jared had certainly enjoyed it, but maybe Jensen hadn’t, after all
Jared’s experience in the whole gay sex thing was limited to college fumbles and
went no further than mutual hand jobs. He was so confused, was this thing a real
marriage now? Had they really taken that step that meant, for the rest of the year of
the marriage, they would be with each other in more than name? Every time Jensen
was with him, talking to him, helping him to shower, never taking it further than just
helping, it was enough to kill Jared with anticipation.
He had actually managed a full dinner tonight, sat at the scarred table in the kitchen
with Donna and JD and Mac just listening to the teasing between Jensen and his
sister, and desperately missing Megan. JD had become somewhat of a fixture at the
D and Jared was learning a lot about his real dad, about the pressure the nineteen
year old had been under to just walk away from the woman he loved. They spoke of
the threats to Sherry that Gerald had loved to make, that she would be cut her out of
his life, take their sons, and publicly disown her. JD told Jared of the last day… the
single day that would live with JD forever, the day that Sherry said she didn’t love
him, could never love him… that she had chosen Gerald.
Donna had listened to everything JD was saying, her heart aching for the man she
now called friend, and for her son’s husband, who sat there listening like a puppy,
eager to hang on every word that made him not Gerald’s son. She thought back to
earlier times, when her and Sherry had been friends, way back at school, way before
Gerald and Alan. Gerald had been fixated on Donna, had always wanted her, but he
had lost to the tall dark haired Alan. That single choice had changed everything and
had started the chain of events that left Alan and Gerald at war, that had made
Gerald cut Alan out of their fledgling oil venture, which had made Alan the bitter older
man he had become. Sometimes as Donna listened to JD talking, sharing memories
with his son of happier times, it made her wish for those simpler days, wondering if
maybe… if only… wondering… what if she had made a different choice?
Jared had gone into one of his daydreams, he seemed to do that a lot at the moment.
His brain processing all the things he was hearing, and all the things he was feeling.
Still this evening he could concentrate on nothing other than Jensen. The thoughts
that twisted in his mind, all the wondering what it would be like to have sex with a
man, not just any man, but the gorgeous sexy cowboy he had married, it just made
his head spin. Sense memory of the feel of him, hard and soft, muscled and strong
under his hand, was making him hard in his jeans, seemingly a constant problem
around his husband.
“You with us Jared?” Jensen asked, startling Jared out of his thoughts, causing him
to glance round the table a blush climbing his cheeks, wondering if Jensen could
read his thoughts. “Tired? Sore?” Jensen added softly, subtle concern crossing his
face. Jared blinked steadily, not sure what Jensen wanted to hear, too used to giving
answers that people expected, and having to really think how he did feel.
“No, not so tired,” he started, “feeling good actually,” he saw Jensen’s eyes widen,
and watched as the older man sat more upright in his seat. “Just missing Meg I
guess,” Jared finished. Jensen moved abruptly to stand, clearing the table, scraping
plates and loading the dishwasher, all the while humming under his breath. Every so
often he glanced back at Jared who sat listening to his mom and sister as they talked
babies. He wondered if Jared felt anything for Mac, wondered if his husband’s heart
had thawed enough for regret at what he had used against Jensen to get him to
agree. He had sensed a change in Jared since the fire, a softening in him, an
understanding as the spell of the Ackles family was cast about him. He couldn’t say
he had anything other than healthy lust for the tall man who sat at the kitchen table
but respect was at least starting to build alongside the desire to bury himself in that “Jensen did you hear me?” Donna asked laughing, pulling Jensen out of his
daydreams of fucking Jared.
”No momma,” he replied patiently, smiling ruefully at her, knowing that tone, knowing
he was on the teasing end of her tongue.
”So then,” Mac piped up, “he just plain jumped off the roof, straight into the pile of …”
she collapsed in giggles at the grimace on Jensen’s face, unable to even finish the
sentence, she was laughing so hard. Thing is Jared was smiling as well, and also
kind of smirking and Jensen groaned inwardly, great, now he had ammunition from
the great raft of embarrassing things Jensen did as a child. Making the decision he
reached out a hand to Jared.
“Time to bring the torture to an end… bed for the invalid I think,” he said simply,
daring Jared to say differently. There was a slight pause, Jared’s eyes widening
slightly, the smile that had been on his face falling into a look of discomfort, including
the whole worrying his lower lip with his teeth thing. It was probably only seconds, but
it seemed like minutes, the question hanging in the air between them, and finally
Jared stood, taking Jensen’s hand and curling fingers through his husbands. Mac
startled to giggle again, JD looked strangely proud of the open affection, and Donna
just looked on fondly as the two men left the kitchen. She had no idea how it started,
or how they decided to marry, but at least they had a connection now that no one
could deny. She hoped it was more than lust, hoped it was a real connection, prayed
for it inside. Jensen was so lost with only his family and his horses, denying himself a
life to look after his family, and Jared, well Jared was scarred and needed someone,
they seemed to fit, against all odds, Padalecki name or not, they just seemed right.
Jared followed Jensen along the long corridor to the back of the house where Jensen
had his own rooms. Just two, one the bedroom with the large queen side bed, the
sick room, where Jared had slept for so long, and the other set up as an office full of
paperwork and schedules, photos and posters for seasonal rotas. Jensen had spent
some time in the bedroom earlier, after he had sat Jared at the kitchen table to chat
to Donna as she prepared dinner. The window was slightly open to the warm Texas
evening, filmy material moving subtly and the lights low. Fresh sheets were on the
bed and the whole room smelt less like ill person and more like… more like Jensen.
Jared frowned, tugging his hand free of Jensen’s and moving to the bed, sighing and
crossing to sit on the bed, he guessed from the way he had been pulled into the room
that he had done or said something wrong at the dinner table, and he waited to be
told.
It startled him when Jensen crouched down between his knees, looking up and under
Jared’s long hair, his hands solid against Jared’s thighs. “You gotta promise me,”
Jensen started with a smirk, “that you tell no one the stories you heard at dinner, on
pain of death.” Jared wasn’t sure what to say, it didn’t sound like Jensen was angry
with him or disappointed in his family for sharing all those stories of Jensen’s
childhood.
“I wont,” Jared finally offered; ducking his head again, suddenly unaccountably and
stupidly shy.
With a sudden surge Jensen stood and encouraged Jared to scoot back on the bed,
only hesitating when Jared winced at the pull on his chest. Jared may well fancied
himself all fixed but Jensen knew for sure that his husband wasn’t ready for what
Jensen had originally planned, which made only one option the right one. Jared lay
back on the soft pillows, the fresh white cotton contrasting against his hazel toned
skin. He tried not to think just how much Jeff’s visit today had pushed him to start this
with Jared, considering he was still not one hundred percent well, and just went with
the flow.
“I was thinking, Mr Ackles-Padalecki, that there’s no sense in us both going without
for the rest of the year, and that tonight we could maybe make this marriage a real
one, consummate this marriage, become lovers, in every sense of the word. Then
your brother will have no more ammunition left.” He dropped a small kiss to the skin
on Jared’s long neck, opening his mouth and kiss biting into the warmth, the pulse
below his lips. Gently he traced the kisses up his husband’s chin and settled his
mouth onto Jared’s his tongue gently encouraging Jared to open his mouth for a kiss.
He sensed Jared pull back against the pillow, hearing the words that spilled into the
half-light, “I haven’t… I’ve never…” had sex with a man, bottomed, topped, nothing…,
“I don’t know if…” I can do this…
“For tonight, just let me do all the work, eh?” Jensen paused to steal a heated kiss,
kissing away the words he knew Jared wanted to say, he lifted his head, “I want you
to fuck me… I’ll show you… open myself up… you can help… and then you can just
lay back and I’ll show you what it can be like.” Jared whimpered and breathed a
sound somewhere between a groan to stop and a plea for more, arching
unconsciously into Jensen’s weight across his groin. “You wanna do this het-boy?”
the nickname didn’t drip it’s normal sarcasm, to Jared’s ear it sounded affectionate,
almost intimate and he couldn’t fight the feeling of wanting more, of wanting Jensen’s
hands on him.
He nodded, pushing with his hand to move slightly down the bed and lay flat, and
then reaching up to pull down Jensen’s head for more of the addictive kissing. He
could taste Jensen for hours, just kiss and suck and tongue fuck his mouth until
neither of them could breathe anymore, and it was so damn natural it was scary.
Jensen responded with equal ferocity, still being ultra careful not to lean on Jared’s
chest where the bandages still lay, raising to his knees and arching over his new
lover. He began talking, over and over repeating words that stilled Jared’s fears,
beautiful… needy… mine…I’ll look after you…,a story of kisses over his body.
Talking softly as he slipped Jared’s clothes from him as easy as he might a child,
until he lay naked under him, pliant and warm. Pushing his own jeans and boxers off
and lifting his T-shirt over his head he lowered himself to one side, reaching into the
bedside cabinet, pulling out what he needed and asking one final question with a
raised eyebrow and carefully timed hesitation. Jared didn’t want to know hesitation or
want time to think, craving more kisses, more touches, grabbing at work strong arms
and just holding on. It blew Jensen’s mind the way this man arched up under him,
stealing breath with every touch, he couldn’t remember a connection this instant, this
intense with anyone before. He knew he should stop, give them time, not race after
this so fast… but… if he were to stop and think about this he may never have
touched Jared in the first place… it was like playing with fire. He sat up, Jared
chasing the kisses, his head lifting from the pillow and Jensen hushed him with a
single finger on his kiss bitten lips as he tried to ask why Jensen had stopped.
Jared shook his head, clasping the finger in his hand, “I told you already… don’t ask
me to stop now… I don’t want to stop,” he said urgently. As if to emphasis the point,
he was pushing himself against Jensen’s thigh, and at the same time letting out that
god damned half whimper that curled lust and want into the base of Jensen’s spine. It
was an invitation to sin, Jared spread out on the bed against the white cotton, his
limbs languid and stretched, the dips and lines of muscles so simple to trace with his
tongue and his teeth. He sensed coiled tension inside Jared, felt him wanting to turn
Jensen, to take some control, but tonight wasn’t about control, it was about sensation
and learning. He leaned back on his haunches, smoothing slick over anxious fingers,
capturing Jared’s hand and mixing the smooth oil over his hand as well.
“Remember the game Jared, just do what I do…” Jared just nodded, watching
carefully as Jensen pushed a finger inside himself, watching as he pushed in a
second, seeing the faint sheen of sweat on Jensen’s body. He didn’t think his dick
could get any harder, or his lust get any more frenzied as Jensen pulled at Jared’s
hand covered with the slick and encouraged him to explore with one finger along side
Jensen’s own fingers. The intensity of the feeling, the heat, the touch, Jensen
keening and leaning over, pushing back on their joined fingers, it was too much and
Jared could feel his orgasm starting to build.
He wanted to say, wait, it’s too fast, but all that came out was a muffled half groan as
he arched up off the bed, seeking any kind of friction for his neglected dick. Jensen
seemed to understand though, pulling his fingers out and Jared’s too and moving he
rolled a condom onto Jared’s weeping dick, lined with Jared, held Jared, guided
Jared, wincing and sucking in a deep breath as he pushed down, the very tip of his
lover’s dick breaching him. From then on feeling took over, primal need and the
chase for ecstasy made Jensen move down, until he was nearly there, the look of
astonished fear in Jared’s face would have made him laugh, but he knew… knew the
almost religious experience of what Jared was feeling. They moved together, Jensen
positioned just so, Jared pushing up in counter rhythm just at the right angle and
soon there was nothing except a need to come right the fuck now.
“I can’t…Jensen… I can’t…” Jared moaned, pulling Jensen’s head down by his hair,
hands tangled and damp, insistent that Jensen should be kissing, and Jensen leaned
into open mouth breaths that wasn’t kissing so much as just touching and tasting.
Jensen was so near, Jared’s eyes were closed, his muscles tense, Jensen could see
it would be seconds before Jared lost it inside him, he just needed… needed…
“touch me…” he half ordered, half begged, and Jared was there, wrapping a huge
hand around Jensen’s dick and moving and twisting to push Jensen over the edge.
It was Jensen that lost it first, by seconds, hot and hard and clenching around Jared
so tight it pushed the younger man over the edge after his husband. It was intense, it
was perfect. Jensen, half falling, as he moved into the ripples of orgasm that chased
along his spine. Jared had tears in the corners of his eyes, Jensen kissed them away
with murmured praise and thanks until he finally stilled his movement and, careful of
Jared’s chest, sunk in for more kisses that he needed more than air.
They stayed locked in the intimate embrace, until Jensen rolled off and to the side,
sleep pulling him to cuddle into Jared’s side, Jared dealing with the condom and
laying back, exhaustion in every muscle.
“Know what Jensen?” he said tiredly, pulling Jensen in closer, just to touch skin.
“Wha’?” Jensen replied, on the very edges of sleep.
“You, cowboy, are worth every dollar I paid.”
Jared could never know how much that hurt… how could he?
...
Chapter 13
“You, cowboy, are worth every dollar I paid.”
The words fell like a death sentence in the warm room, Jensen pulled from post coital
bliss to temper, quicker than you could snap a finger.
“What the fuck Jared?” he bit out angrily, pushing away from the furnace of his
husband and sitting upright. Jared just blinked up at him, a blank look on his face, a
blank look that quickly turned to stunned shame and he too scrambled to sit up, the
bandages pulling and the sheets tangling round his legs.
Jensen jumped off of the bed, pulling on the discarded jeans and T all the time trying
to ignore Jared’s face, at the look of complete horror on it, at the pleading words, I
didn’t mean it that way, Jensen, please… it was a joke.
Jensen silenced him with a sweep of his hand, “way to make your husband feel like a
whore,” he bit out, leaving the room and slamming the door behind him as he left.
Stunned, it took Jared a few seconds to get his head round what he had just done, it
was a joke, it had been a joke, and as usual his stupid dry sense of humor had
backfired on him. Scrambling he stood, swaying at the rush of blood to his head and
picking up the jeans and top he had been dressed in, sitting on the edge of the bed
trying to pull the damn denim over his uncooperative legs. His stomach was still
sticky with come, and he wiped at it with furious sweeps of cotton bedding, pulling his
T on and rushing to the door, dragging it open and calling after his escaping
husband.
Donna walked out of the kitchen, a mug of coffee in her hand, a curious JD standing
beside her, “Jared? What’s wrong, Jensen went out of here like he was lit on fire.”
“It’s me. I fucked up.” Jared offered, starting for the front door, opening it and seeing
the truck still sat there. That meant Jensen hadn’t left the D. He slipped on his
sneakers.
“Jared sweetheart…” Donna’s voice was quiet, JD’s hand on her shoulder, and Jared
looked back at her with determination on his face.
He couldn’t stop to talk or exchange pleasantries, “Donna I need to - ”
“The barn, the old one at the back, he’ll be with his babies,” she explained simply,
and Jared had the grace to blush at his rudeness. “Jared, one last thing, I don’t know
what is wrong, but the two of you need to talk, Jensen is a proud man, he wont tell
you what he is thinking, you need to make sure you know.” Jared nodded, shuffling
down the steps, his heart pounding in his chest and his breathing more than a little
labored, he needed to slow down if he was going to remain conscious, let alone have
the power of rational speech, when he got to the barn.
He picked his way past the debris of the new barn, his eyes drawn to the charcoal
blackness of the charred wood, his head full of images from that night, Jensen
dragging him out, Jensen worried and scared for him. The images mixed with the
feeling Jared had building inside him, want, need, desire… love… he couldn’t love a
man… he wasn’t gay… hadn’t been gay… he didn’t know what to think.
He rounded the corner, the side of the older red barn looming in the diminishing light
of evening, no sign of Jensen yet. He wanted to call out, but then he didn’t want
Jensen to have time to run, because he needed to hear what Jared had to say this
time. When he saw him, it almost drove him to his knees in self-disgust; this strong
proud man sat in the hay, the foal’s head in his lap, crooning to her, words of
nonsense. It was all Jared could do not to drop to his knees beside Jensen and just
beg for forgiveness, when what he needed to do was to get Jensen to understand
why he had said what he said.
“Hey,” he finally offered to the dim interior, watching Jensen refuse to look up and
meet his eyes. “Look Jensen, I’m sorry, I know I upset you but - ”
“I’m not a girl, I don’t need touchy feel crap Jared, so quit with the explanation. Lets
just chalk it up to experience, I know where I stand, I wont forget again.”
Jared was stunned, completely and totally speechless. Is that what Jensen wanted?
Carefully he lowered himself to sit next to Jensen, curling a hand in the foal’s soft
mane and scratching idly.
“At the beginning Jensen,” he started softly, like his words might scare Jensen away,
“I could have accepted that from you, I owned you, I bought you, paid for you, you
were just another pawn in the Padalecki game. You meant nothing to me, Mac…” he
paused, knowing he needed to be totally honest about this before Jensen would
believe anything else he said. “Mac meant nothing to me. When Chad told me what
had happened, it was just another mark in the column for screwing with my family
and choosing you to do it with.” He stopped again. Honesty was hard when it meant
opening himself up like this. “That isn’t me though Jensen, not the real me, I don’t
hurt people, I don’t buy people, I’m not like them, thing is, I became one of them, I
mean… if the only way to beat them is to play them at their own game then hell, I can
do that. So way back, when I first approached you, it wasn’t to give Mac support or to
fall in love with you, it was just to have a commodity I could use as leverage.”
Jensen looked sideways at him, picking up on a couple of things he had said. “You
betrayed Chad’s trust, he was your friend.”
“My only real friend, apart from Megan, and yeah, he was just another pawn, and one
day he might forgive me, although I am not holding my breath.”
”How you can say it so matter of fact? Doesn’t it hurt that this only friend of yours
hates you for what you did?”
“You want me to sit and cry? ‘Cos I could, if it would convince you. At the drop of a
hat I can show you how this is screwing with me, but I can’t let myself do it… do you
see… if I start to let it out, I feel like it is gonna destroy me, it is so deep.”
Jensen nodded OK, “So that is how it started…” he prompted carefully.
“Then it changed, I don’t know when or how, I mean, I wish I could go back and touch
that moment, and hold it, that very minute that the real Jared started to dig for the
surface. It could have been when I saw Mac so obviously pregnant, so pale, or when
Chad knocked me to the floor and told me he hated me… maybe it was just now
when I hurt you so bad. I don’t know. I just know what I have with you, however you
label it, however long you want it to last, it’s real.” Jared’s voice hitched, twentyseven years of Padalecki pressure pushing down on his shoulders, forcing emotions
back into his heart. “I don’t know how else to say it. I don’t see you as a pawn, or an
asset, I see you as a person, my husband, my lover. I don’t own you, I don’t want to
own you, I want to take the prenup and tear it into pieces, I want to take that damn
contract and burn it to ashes. Money shouldn’t define your life and it shouldn’t define
mine or what we have.” He stopped, aware of how silent and still Jensen was,
wondering if he had really fucked this up. Jensen hadn’t given any indication he
wanted this thing to go past the year, never said a word, and always joked about
counting down the days until his freedom from het-boy… “Jensen?”
“I get that Jared. All of that. Thing is… I know… I see you changing… see you are
different. Maybe I just put too much on to you, expecting you to know what I needed,
what I want.”
“What do you want? Tell me, and if I can give it to you…”
“I want to see Mac healthy, my niece born and Mac safe. I want a husband that is
also my lover. I want Jared Ackles-Padalecki in my life. I can’t see past the year with
him, but I know what I want now.”
Jared held out his free hand, and Jensen curled his fingers into the large paw, linking
them, his eyes steady on Jared’s.”
”OK,” Jared finally said, “OK.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Donna wasn’t surprised at the visitor; had been expecting her arrival for a few days,
all the time wondering how a mother could seemingly abandon her son as Sherry
Padalecki had done over the past week.
“Sherry,” she said politely, glancing at the perfect pantsuit, the perfect hair and the
perfect make-up.
“Donna,” she started carefully, “I wonder if I may speak to Jared.”
“He is in the barn with Jensen, they should be back soon,” she said widening the
door and indicating Sherry should come in, which she did, but not before hesitating
on the threshold like Donna was going to attack her.
Sherry followed Donna to the kitchen, her eyes widening at seeing JD sitting at the
wooden trellis table. He immediately stood, knocking coffee over the side of his mug,
an instant blush climbing his cheeks. They had seen each other on few occasions at
TexOil, but never been in a situation where they needed to talk and both of them just
stared, years of history separating them.
“Iced Tea, Sherry, or perhaps coffee?”
“Tea would be lovely, thank you.” Sherry replied, her southern politeness her armor,
with that she could cope with anything.
“I want to thank you,” JD started, and Sherry blinked nervously, please don’t say
anything that is going to break me, she prayed in her head. “For telling me that Jared
needed me.”
“You are very welcome Jeffery, he did need you.” She said carefully, and then slid
into the seat diagonal to JD, thanking Donna for the ice tea and sipping on it slowly.
No one spoke, it wasn’t uncomfortable silence, not really, it was thoughtful silence,
and was only broken when the front door opened and laughter came into the house
followed by Jared and Jensen, holding hands and smiling at each other. Jensen saw
her first, stopped in his tracks, tightened his grip on Jared’s hand and moved closer,
protective.
“Mom,” Jared said simply, dropping Jensen’s hand and closing the distance to draw
his mom into a patented Jared hug, “s’good to see you. We were gonna come to the
house tomorrow when I got the all clear.” Sherry stiffened in her son’s embrace, still
clearly unnerved by his exuberant shows of affection and then she pulled back.
“I came to talk.” She said simply, “Is there somewhere we can go that is a bit more…
private?”
“Ya’all can use the good room,” Donna offered, meaning the one room she kept tidy
and clean for visitors, where there was no smell of horses or a pervasive sheen of
Texas soil dust. Sherry nodded her thanks, and Jared offered his arm, chatting about
something to do with foals that went straight over her head. He shut the door behind
them and she sat on one of the brown leather sofas, her knuckles white from
grasping at the folder in her hands.
“I want to say something first,” she began, Jared settling to sit opposite, his face an
open book of worry as he categorized the emotions on his mom’s face. Worry,
nerves… and something else… sadness he thought.
“Uh huh.” What else could he say? He was used to the society speak that his mom
could pull from her hat like it was as easy as breathing. The you should’s… and the
you cant’s that formed the foundation of her social standing. He would just sit there,
take what she had to say to him, and then just go and find Jensen and maybe have
some more, frankly awesome, sex.
“First, I want to say that I am sorry. No… more than sorry… about the way the family
has treated you over the past years Jared Tristan. You were not a child from my
marriage, but I want you to know you were a child born from love, and I never
regretted the deals I made to keep you, not for one day.”
“Momma?” None of this sounded right, it was like she was expecting him to not
understand or something worse.
“I regret losing JD, I regret what it did to him to have you taken away, regret that
Gerald hated you every day since you have been born.” She stopped, her voice not
quite so steady, or forged of iron, a softness to her vowels, a slide to her real
feelings. “I want to try and make it up to you one day, I don’t know how I begin to do
that, or how I begin to win back your love and affection, but I will try.”
Jared couldn’t bear to hear anymore, rising and crossing to sit next to her, capturing
her tiny hands in his, the skin smooth under his touch. “You are my momma, I will
always love you, and you don’t have to try.” Sherry lifted wet eyes to his, the same
hazel green of his own eyes, a look of hope in them. They stared at each other for a
little while, each wanting to say something but not knowing what to say. Finally
Sherry lifted her hand to lay it flat on her son’s cheek.
“I couldn’t be prouder of you,” she finally said, “despite us, you grew up so well, you
and your sister.”
“Thank you momma,” Jared said simply, pressing his cheek against her hand. There
was hope here.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
JD and Donna sat chatting quietly, a nervous Jensen pacing the kitchen, “I should be
in there,” he said, crossing to the door, Donna there between door and Jensen before
he could blink.
“You leave them be.”
”You don’t understand mom, she’s in there, probably spitting poisonous words in his
ears, and we had just… momma… we’ve only just connected… and he’s gonna go
back to being…” Jensen didn’t have the words.
“Give him credit for his own mind Jensen Ross.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“I don’t understand,” Jared said carefully as his mom handed him the folder.
“I mean it Jared, in there is every shred of evidence. TexOil should have been split
fifty fifty with Alan Ackles, it isn’t all ours, half of it belongs to Donna and her family.”
“OK. Then we give it to them and help them to get what is rightfully theirs.” It seemed
simple to Jared, that that is what they should do.
“Jared, listen to me, I want that too, but… I also wanted to give you the chance to
bury this… to put an end to all the drama and the worry. If you show this to them you
stand to lose everything, they can wipe TexOil out from under us with one clever
lawyer. You could lose it all, your money, the land, the offices, your cars…”
“Momma,” Jared made to stand, pulling Sherry with him, “you don’t understand. I
don’t want any of that for me.” He placed a hand over his own heart, “I think I have
everything I want or need in here.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It was like a council of war. Mac had called Chad, reasoning internally that her fiancé
should be here for this, and he now sat with Mac. Donna and Sherry were sitting
opposite and Jensen and Jared leaned back against the sink. Josh had arrived not
long before, Anna settling the kids in the TV room with game controllers and snacks
and now half sitting on Josh’s lap. JD was poring over the papers, flicking from one to
another, form one statement of intent, to another contract, to bank statements aged
with time. Finally he lifted his head to Sherry, his eyes sad, resigned. It was Donna
he spoke to though, Donna who had supported and loved Alan Ackles in his hours of
despair over what his family had left.
“It’s true, all of it.” He said warily, wondering what the Ackles were going to say now.
“How long have you known about this?” Donna asked Sherry simply, willing her to be
honest. Sherry looked down at the table.
“I found the papers today, in Gerald’s safe, I didn’t know before.” Donna winced at
the hidden lies in Sherry’s voice, but half smiled when Sherry finished the sentence,
“… but I know I always suspected it of him, I was just too scared to do anything about
it.” She looked over at Jared, who smiled encouragingly, and then back at Donna,
waiting for her decision.
“I don’t want it,” Donna finally stated simply. The hate and betrayal had destroyed her
marriage, driven her husband to an early death, she wanted no part of it. She had
watched as resentment and anger had changed the man she had fallen in love with,
to someone only intent on finding a new money making scheme that would mean he
could topple the Padaleckis, squandering every penny he had made in his life on get
rich quick schemes. She had loved him to distraction, bore three children in that love
filled marriage, it had killed her inside to watch him give up, to lose the will to fight for
his family and his marriage. She had known immediately what she was going to say.
“Mom,” Josh said, his fingers tight on Anna’s and exchanging a loaded look with his
wife before nodding carefully. “We don’t want it either.” Anna smiled a soft smile at
her husband and Jared’s heart turned as he saw the open easy love and
communication the couple had. “I have what I want, a business that supports my
family, a wife I love, kids that I couldn’t be more proud of and a family that I am close
to. I don’t want any part of TexOil or the money.”
Donna nodded, a small smile on her lips, she couldn’t be prouder of her son at this
moment. “Mackenzie?” She prompted gently.
“I want to live to see my daughter,” Mac said softly, “that is all I want.”
Chad wrapped an arm around her, pulling her in close. “War isn’t going to help that,”
he said to the room.
“So then… it’s just you… Jensen?” This from Jared, who stood tall, his iron will and
stubborn determination the only thing stopping him from dropping to the floor in
exhaustion.
So many emotions flooded Jensen, anger, distrust, shock; he didn’t know where to
start in putting them in order. He turned to Jared; this needed to be said to his face.
“We would be turning down fifty percent of the billions that TexOil turns over, the
millions in the bank, the land, the control. Not only that but with legal moves we could
maybe have it all…” Jared nodded, he knew TexOil was lost to the Padalecki’s; it
was just a matter of time.
“You should do this, you should fight for what is rightfully yours.” Jared was insistent,
his eyes sparking fire and utter determination. Jensen stopped him, raising a hand
and laying it on his husband’s chest, unconsciously touching the bandage that
covered his husband’s chest.
”You just told me that money shouldn’t define your life, that it shouldn’t define mine.”
Jensen said gently, seeing the denial rise in Jared and then fall away just as quickly.
Jared’s whole world had tilted on its axis; he didn’t know what to think of Jensen’s
soft words. “I don’t want it Jared.”
“Jen - “
“No Jared, I don’t want it.” He pulled at Jared, cradled him in a hug that was
protective, gentling, safe. They would learn to live with Jensen’s decision… one day.
Silence…
“Is now a good time for me to say Chad has asked me to marry him?” Mac suddenly
announced, looking at each member of her family in turn. Seeing confusion,
happiness, shock, love… in every single one of them. “I said yes,” she added softly,
leaning into Chad and exchanging a soft smile. No one said a word, waiting for
Donna.
Donna who just smiled and held out a hand to her youngest, “oh baby, I am so happy
for you both,” then the dam opened and Mac was swept up in hugs from her
brothers, JD and Anna, talking over each other, plans and dates and happy smiles.
Sherry choosing that moment to make her excuses and leave, Jared walking her to
the door and pulling her in for a final hug of thanks. When he got back to the kitchen
it was a scene filled with happiness and love and it made his heart ache.
Chad stood by Mac proudly, every so often glancing at Jared who was clearly
overwhelmed and still in a bad headspace for the news he had received from his
mom and probably the decision his husband had just made. Chad missed Jared,
despite what the idiot had done, and he watched the tall man slip out of the kitchen
and through the door to the main corridor, assuming that this time when he left the
kitchen he was going somewhere to hide.
Jared, for his part, didn’t feel right. It was all wrong, the Ackles family should benefit
from TexOil, it should have been Jensen with the privilege, the money, not having to
scrape to survive, it should have been Josh at an expensive law school, Mac with the
surgeries she needed without fear of bankrupting her family. He left the room, all too
much for him to process, and found himself in their bedroom, his and Jensen’s room,
the windows open again, the smell of impending rain heavy in the air, and dejected,
worried, upset, he slumped to the bed. He had wanted to hug Chad to congratulate
his best friend; it was what Chad had talked about for so many evenings, those
evenings that Jared hadn’t lost to drink and women anyway. This girl, Mackenzie
Ackles, they’d met at the hospital, and for Chad, befriending the sixteen year old
patient had quickly turned into love. He had worried over the age difference, he had
worried over her being ill, he talked and talked and talked. Only thing was, Jared
hadn’t really listened, not like a real friend would, he had just learned what was useful
to him and turned on his best friend. And tonight, Chad couldn’t even look at him.
The door to the room opened and Jared didn’t look around, assuming it was Jensen,
“sorry,” he began, “I’m just…” he couldn’t word what he wanted to say, irritation
inside him at feeling so damn useless.
“Just what?” Jared twisted, Chad… Chad and Josh in the room… Josh and Chad…
Josh closing the door behind him and leaning on the door. What the…
“Just…” The words still wouldn’t come, still wouldn’t push through the self-pity he was
heaping on himself.
It was Josh that started the conversation, pushing himself away from the door and
standing feet apart and fists buried deep in his jean pockets, “did you use Mac’s
pregnancy to get Jensen to marry you, just so you could get what you felt you were
owed from TexOil and so you could fuck with your father?” It was a long sentence,
and Jared looked at first Chad and then Josh, and then back again. He sighed
inwardly, the guilt spiraling out of control inside him, and he knew he just wanted a
clean slate, for everyone to know what he was, so that he just may be able to make
himself a better person.
“Yes,” Jared flinched as he said it, waiting for Chad to hold him whilst Josh wailed on
him, knowing he wouldn’t put up a fight, knowing he deserved it. Josh closed his
eyes, hunching his shoulders; Jared thought he could see grief in Josh’s face, read
sadness as he opened his eyes again. Jared continued, “and I’m sorry, I wasn’t the
person I am now, I was… changed… how can i…” How can I get my friend back…
how can I say sorry to Mac… should I tell Mac?
“You and Jensen seem kind of friendly despite the start.” Chad interrupted whatever
Josh was about to say in response, touching his own neck to indicate the bruises on
the place where Jared’s shoulder met his neck.
Jared felt himself blush at that, he seriously full on blushed. What could he say?
Chad was asking him to be honest, demanding honesty where none had been
before. Josh tilted his head, patiently waiting for Jared to speak.
“I think I love him.” Jared said quietly. It was simple in the end. So very simple
Josh nodded, coming to some sort of big brother decision in his head, holding out his
hand for Jared to shake, which Jared took pathetically quickly. “OK,” was all Josh
said, and then turning on his heel he left the room and pulled the door shut again.
“Chad - ”
“Like Josh said…” Chad interrupted swiftly, “OK. You did what you did for reasons I
will never understand, because of a father I will never understand, but it’s come right
in the end, and I wont hold a grudge with my best friend.”
”I haven’t been a very good friend,” Jared offered sadly, an apology in quiet words.
“You only ever see the bad stuff in yourself Jay. Without your encouragement I would
have given up on Mac a long time ago.” Jared felt tears pricking the back of his eyes,
emotion overwhelming in him, that Chad saw this good in him, that Chad wasn’t
focusing on the bad stuff that had happened. “So, we’re cool?”
Jared nodded, and crossed to pull Chad into a manly back slapping hug, “We’re cool”
“Kitchen. Beer.” Chad commanded opening the door and waiting for Jared to follow,
that stupid inane Chad smile of doom on his face, the smile that Jared had missed,
and without hesitation Jared went into the kitchen after his friend, catching the tail
end of an embarrassing story about Josh and a pair of red panties. Jensen took his
hand, pulled him in for a hug, glancing at Josh and Chad and then up at his husband.
”OK?” he asked quietly.
“OK.” Jared replied, leaning down to kiss full lips gently, pulling back and smiling,
“OK.”
The conversation turned to celebrating, with Mac demanding a celebration dinner
out, Jared instantly offering to take everyone to the best restaurant in Dallas on him,
and Mac quietly refusing, just to The Rusty Nail, bit of a dive but the best steaks in
town… simple, just us, no fuss…I wanna call Meg, she can meet us there….
They went in two trucks, Chad the designated driver in one, Mac curled next to him,
Josh with Anna on his lap in the back. Donna drove the second with JD, Jared and
Jensen squeezed close in the back talking about what had been happening over the
tops of Josh’s kids who were chattering excitedly about what they were going to do at
the babysitters.
It was just what everyone needed, air, escape, normalcy, beer. No one spoke about
the decisions they had made just focusing on the proposal. The bar come restaurant
was busy; Friday seemed to be a popular night for everyone, from couples to groups.
Music was swelling from strategically placed speakers and the smell of steak and
potatoes permeated the air, Josh ordering various beers, whisky chasers and wine
with a softly spoken and sarcastic, your round Richie Rich in Jared’s ear. He smirked
and Jared half smiled back, kind of uneasily, given he didn’t know Josh all that well
yet despite their discussion earlier.
It was a mere half an hour before it started to go horribly wrong, Mac and Megan
disappearing to the bathroom, Mac really unable to hold the water she was sipping in
her bladder any longer than ten minutes.
“You slumming it Padalecki?”
Everyone looked up, at the clearly inebriated guy leaning onto the back of Mac’s
empty chair, his face twisted in a rare kind of anger.
“I’m sorry?” Jared answered, clearly confused, “do I know you?”
The man snorted a bitter laugh, “when you paid me shit to work for your company
you knew me, when you fired me with no grounds you knew my name - ”
“We’re just having a quiet meal here son,” JD interrupted the flow of venom with a
firm touch on the man’s arm as he tried to guide him away from the table. The man
just wrenched his arm free…
“You here with your fag husband Padalecki?”
Jensen stood abruptly, rudeness he could handle, but making it personal that was
just way too much. "Why don't you just go back over to your table and shut your god
damn mouth."
"You must be Padalecki's cocksucking faggot of a husband." The man lurched
forward, JD trying to pull him back as Jensen pulled himself tall and shielded the
table from the harsh words.
"That the best you got, bubba? My momma's called me worse things than that." He
said clearly, wincing inwardly as his mom started to protest.
“Jensen Ross I have never - ”
Megan and Mac arrived back at the table, both puzzled to see this man toe to toe
with Jensen, JD on one said and Jared and Josh both standing now. “Jen?”
"I see the little Padalecki whore is here too. How are tricks, Princess Megan?" Megan
looked at Jared blankly; she had no more idea who this was than Jared had.
That was enough to encourage Jared forward, "that's my sister you are talking about,
asshole. I don't tolerate anyone speaking to Megan that way. You really need to
apologize to her and to my husband before I kick your ass." Jared then swallowed…
had he actually just said that, in a strange bar, in the middle of nowhere, with a group
of buddies circling the guy looking for the fight? Shit.
"Fuck you. I ain't doing no apologising to no Padalecki." The man and his friends
crowded closer, in the background tables were being moved, people obviously used
to bar brawls, to the point that the bartender was moving bottles from the counter,
taking side bets on who was gonna come out on top and dialling the cops at the
same time.
Jensen turned to the table, "Momma, you need to get Mac and Megan out of here.
Josh you need to stay out of this, cos I sure as hell am gonna need you to bail me
out of jail tonight." Josh refused, standing close to his brother, the tension in him,
from deciding about TexOil to confronting Jared on what he had done, was tight and
he was desperate to get the stress out somehow.
Mac sighed at her brothers, this wasn’t the first time they had brawled and it wouldn’t
be the last, but she was concerned for Chad who looked a bit mystified, and for Jared
who just looked shell shocked at the vitriol this guy was throwing at him. The man's
friends step up to join him, which was mac’s cue to move her and Meg, Donna and
Anna to the door. Jared, and Chad move around to join Jensen but Jensen stepped
forward, away from the others, talking to the first man who had the problem, "dude
I'm gonna let you have the first punch free, but I want you to remember the name of
the man who’s gonna beat your ass… Ackles-Padalecki."
The man reacted almost immediately, punching Jensen in the jaw, Jensen’s head
snapping back and Jared moving to intervene, only stopping as Jensen place a hand
in front of him, calmly righting himself, jerking his head to the side to loosen his neck,
then calmly cracking his knuckles. "It's on."
Jensen’s punch was a lot more accurate, and within seconds the entire bar had
erupted into the fight, Jared and Jensen side by side, Chad at Jared’s back, Josh
well into the depths of the crowd and JD providing left side support. It was evenly
matched, every punch and hit returned with equal force, mostly fuelled by the other
side with liquor and anger, which gave Jared the edge. Jensen watched as Jared
pulled a guy off of him by literally lifting him over the bar, muscles bunching and
moving under taut skin, and a knife of desire started to carve into his body. Jared had
waded in with his six five advantage, careful of his incredibly sore chest, Jensen
trying to move to stand in front of him, trying to shield him, but being dragged away
by grabbing hands. Jared managed one or two more swings before the pain in his
chest started to get worse and he was never more pleased to see Chad, who had
previously been behind him, jumping into the fray, the whirling dervish of blond taking
out three of Jared’s opponents before they even realized he was there. Jared tried to
thank him but he was lost again, and then it was over as quickly as it started with the
911 call answered and the cops in the house. Groups huddled back, Donna, Mac,
Megan and Anna hovering nervously, as their guys limped and laughed their way to
them, exchanging war stories and generally high.
Jensen looked at his suave dignified husband in a very different way, seeing his
button down ripped of buttons, sweat staining the material dark, and his hair in wild
disarray around his head, a huge grin across his face. Leaning in it was hard to string
words together, the taste of his own blood metallic in his mouth where his lip was
split. “You are so fucking hot,” he murmured, his hand tracing the sweat path past
hard nipples, the dips and highs of his chest and lower to his crotch. Jared went from
exuberant to holy shit turned on, in less than a second, his dick hardening in his
pants, and he moaned low in his throat. Jensen had blood on his face, his hair flat to
his head with sweat, his jeans torn, his shirt loose about him with a tear running from
neck to arm. The testosterone was swirling in them, the anger, the fear, the fight
instinct pushing and shoving at politeness as Jared pushed back, his dick hard
against Jensen’s hip.
Jesus, Jensen wanted him now, his hand clutching at torn material, his eyes drawn to
Jared’s lips, imagining them wrapped around his dick, imagining him on his knees on
the floor, sucking Jensen down and… shit.
”If you pay agree to pay for the damage Jared we are free to go. Turns out no one
wants to arrest a Padalecki,” Josh’s voice broke through Jensen’s fantasy, but he
didn’t move, his hands gripping harder, only blinking as Josh leaned in and half
whispered, “take it home guys. Me an’ JD’ll sort the girls out.”
The drive home was too long, neither man speaking, the tension in the car so thick
you could feel it wrapping around you, the night inviting all sorts of fantasies and
wants. They made it to the room in seconds, pulling the door closed, locking it,
Jensen ripping at the remains of Jared’s shirt, dropping clothing on the floor, Jared
biting kisses into Jensen’s throat and moaning his appreciation.
“I want you to fuck me,” Jensen growled, “I want you to fuck me til I don’t remember
my name,” he swallowed any protest in a biting hurting kiss, pushing and pulling until
he was on all fours on the bed naked, thrusting slick into Jared’s hands and
demanding Jared start now.
Jared swallowed, how could he even think of turning Jensen down, naked, waiting for
him, begging for it. He squeezed too much slick on his fingers, he knew it was too
much, didn’t care, just slipped a first finger into Jensen, his lover arching and keening
at the pressure inside. It was quickly joined by a second, a third, scissoring. He
wanted to just take him like this, naked, no condom, push inside, but he couldn’t, he
couldn’t be sure he was clean, and cursed the easy sex he had lived on before
Jensen, but, shit, he needed to be responsible, he needed ….
“Jared, now, for gods sake,” Jensen pleaded, "get inside me Jared, now!" Jared
rolled a condom on himself, lined himself up, and began to slowly push into Jensen,
but Jensen wasn’t having any of it, pushing himself back on Jared's dick.
"Jen, slow down. Fuck I’m not gonna…"
Jensen slowed for a minute, looking back over his shoulder at Jared, his eyes bright
with lust, his lips parted, his breathing ragged. "Jared, hard"
Jared swallowed nervously, his instinct not to hurt being decimated by his need to
just bury himself in Jensen, harder and harder. Drawing on every reserve, listening to
the wanton noises he set a fast, deep pace, sweat soon dripping off him onto
Jensen's back, losing himself in Jensen's heat.
Jensen whined, he needed more, it wasn’t enough, he needed Jared to control this,
push him, and he pushed back harder, a gasp of pseudo pain escaping Jared’s
mouth. “All of you Jared, harder, all of you…"
With a growl Jared pulled out, forcing Jensen onto his back, the muscles in his arms
bunching with the exertion, “are you sure?”
"Jared…" was Jensen’s only reply and taking a deep breath, trying to center himself,
trying not to lose it there and then he pushed back in. He has always wondered what
this would be like, to have a lover he could let go with, to not have to hold back his
strength… It was overwhelming, and looking down at his sexy husband, it seemed
Jensen was loving every second of it, his eyes dark and wide, his gaze never leaving
Jared, his fingers gripping the sheets so tightly they almost ripped the material. He
was repeating single words over and over again, more… more… harder… I love you,
it made Jared feel ten feet tall.
He was close, so close, trying to hold back, but he needed Jensen's mouth, needed
Jensen’s tongue in his mouth. As they kissed Jensen started to whimper in pleasure,
his arms going around Jared's broad shoulders. Jared could feel Jensen tightening
up, and he groaned as Jensen pulled Jared's head down to his shoulder, began to
focus on the juncture of neck and throat, sucking and biting hard on warm skin,
tasting salt, tasting blood.
Jensen lost it, coming so hard, clenching around Jared and Jared shouted his own
release, lost in sensation and rocking into the orgasm. Jensen captured Jared’s
mouth in his, the taste of the blood there again, a small moan of contentment
exchanged with heavy breaths and lazy tongues.
Slowly Jared pulled out, Jensen almost whimpering, as Jared pulled free, both feeling
weak as newborn kittens as Jared used sheets to wipe them clean.
Finally they just lay, exhausted, happy, sated, "So sexy Jared. When I looked up and
saw you fighting right next to me, it was the sexiest thing I'd ever seen. You were the
sexiest man I had ever seen." Jensen’s voice was thick with emotion and exhaustion
and he was asleep before Jared could even answer, his last conscious thought as he
drifted off to sleep himself… If that's what got Jensen this turned on, we are so gonna
have to get into fights more often…
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Christian Kane put the phone back in it’s cradle, sitting back in his chair, his feet up
on his obscenely expensive antique desk. He hadn’t spoken to Jensen Ackles in at
least a year, it had been good to catch up, and now he wanted to meet, had laid out
something for Chris to think about with an agreement to meet at their usual haunt
later that night.
Chris stood, stretching out the kinks in his back and walking to his office door, calling
in Margaret, his patient and ruthlessly organized assistant, when she closed the door
behind her, he immediately jumped in with what he needed.
“Can you pull everything about TexOil we’ve got on file, and everything we don’t have
on file, and keep it on the down low?”
Margaret didn’t flinch, scribbling the details in her ever present notebook and looking
up expectantly, “is that all sir?”
“How fast can you get that to me?”
“An hour sir,” she turned and left, Chris wondering aimlessly to the window his eyes
drawn way past the early morning Dallas skyline, his thoughts at the D which he
imagined to be past the towers that blocked his view. Carefully he traced the logo
that was reflected in the glass in reverse from the sign outside his office, Kane
Petroleum, his daddy’s company, ethical resource management and TexOil’s nearest
competitor.
What Jensen had proposed… interesting, very interesting….
Chapter 14
Kristen settled back in her chair the book balanced on one knee the glass of wine in
the other. It was her favorite time of day, her son curled on her lap reading from the
fairy tales in the big gilded book, the only real thing she had brought to this marriage.
It was quiet time, post school, pre Jeff coming home. He had just called, left a
message, wouldn’t be home until 10pm, and that made her stretch her toes
deliciously, six whole hours of peace.
The nanny arrived to take the children to tea and as usual she kissed them both,
feeling a tug as they disappeared for their nutritionally appropriate meals. As the door
began to shut behind them, a hand stopped it, and a soft voice came into the room,
“Kristen, may we talk?”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It started almost as soon as she shut her eyes. The same dream. The same
nightmare, pushing her to cuddle deeper in her covers, a whimper on her lips.
It was sense memories from that night, the evening light soft and subtle, the steps
she was taking into adulthood that night meant so much to her. Eighteen and the
world was hers, her first real event after the surgery. Jensen dropped her at the party
with his usual words of warning and she had rolled her eyes at the whole big brother
thing, he was so damn protective, he and Josh both. It had been an evening that
demanded a little black dress and Mac felt like a princess, a sexy, adult, princess.
By eleven she had been getting tired, but she had made the effort to push through
the constant exhaustion that plagued her, determined to be normal. By twelve she
had lost her friends in the house somewhere, by twelve fifteen she was stuck in a
room with the last person on earth her brother would want her to be with, by twelve
thirty-five she lay sobbing, her innocence gone. At one Jensen picked her up,
concerned to see her so tired, but she had cleaned herself up real good. He would
never know.
Her nightmares were filled with running and not getting away, of fear and
hopelessness, of feeling so small… so hurt…
It sent her upright in her bed, her breathing ragged, and Texas dawn washing the
room with pale ethereal light, it was OK, she was here, home, at the D, grounded,
safe. But the nightmare remained in her memories and she knew where she would
go now, where her nightmares always sent her now…
They sent her to find Jensen.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen had been up since five, his head buzzing with post beer and fight aches and
pains, his ass just this side of sore, and his world a hell of a lot more complicated
than a few weeks ago. He had left Jared curled on the bed, the man not stirring when
Jensen’s internal alarm clock had pushed him out of bed to see to the horses. It was
his quiet time, leaning against the fence with coffee looking over Ackles land, pride in
every pore of him at what his family had achieved. He smiled, remembering the
sleeping giant in his bed rolling into his space as soon as he moved, cuddling into
pillows and murmuring something in his sleep. It was all he could do not to climb
back in bed, just to hold his husband, kiss away the bruises around his left eye, and
the cuts to one of his hands, but his babies needed him.
“Hey big brother,” Jensen smiled at hearing the voice behind him. Mac had taken to
standing with him at this ungodly hour, watching dawn paint pastels across the wideopen sky, claiming Miss Ackles junior was tap dancing on her bladder. Unbidden she
curled into his side and he pulled her close, enjoying the touch.
“Hey little sister,” he said softly, “how’s my niece doin’ in there?”
“Moving it on up to level two,” she replied, rubbing a hand on her belly and smiling
ruefully.
”How did it go yesterday at the hospital, with all that happened we never…”
“Everything is good, the hearts are strong, hers and mine.”
“I wanna come to the next one, talk to the doctor, maybe - “
”Jensen, quit yer worrying, I’m doing well, and I have Chad with me. Talking of
whom…” Mac deliberately stopped there, waiting for the inevitable big brother
response.
“What about Chad?” There it was, big brother worry, large as life.
“He makes me happy Jen, I love him and… I know you and Josh worry.” Jensen
stiffened imperceptibly and then inch by careful inch he relaxed.
“Not only is he ten years older than you, which I’m kinda over now, but he’s bi Mac, I
just worry… to settle on one…” He wasn’t sure how to word it, but Josh had
expressed the same concern last night.
“To settle on a woman like me when he could have all those men out there?” Mac
offered wryly, causing Jensen to blush
“No, Mac, I didn’t mean it like that… I like Chad, he is a good friend for Jared, I like
that he looks after you. Is that what you wanted to hear?” Jensen was being honest;
he really did think Chad was good for his sister from what he had seen.
“More than. So we have your blessing then?” Jensen hugged her tighter; reluctant to
let her go, but knowing he needed to.
“Of course you do baby girl, of course you do.”
”Thank you Jensen, he makes me happy, makes me feel safe.”
“Anyway,” Jensen continued, tongue firmly in cheek, “me ‘n’ Josh can always take
him out by the barns and have a quiet word if he fucks it up.”
“Ass.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Kristen twisted her hands together, tears rolling down her face, the evidence of Jeff’s
indiscretions in glossy eight by tens on the chair next to her. She had known he
strayed, but these pictures were horrific, bruised women, hooker, scars, cuts and
black eyes. This wasn’t right.
“I cant, Sherry, everything I have is in Jeff’s name, and I only have what he allows me
to have.”
“Everything Gerald has is in my name, if you check, I can imagine most of Jeff’s
assets are in your name, less tax that way. You need to get what you can, transfer it,
get the kids, and just go, before he destroys my grandchildren, like Gerald destroyed
my children.”
Kristen sobbed some more, whilst Sherry watched patiently, until she lifted red
rimmed eyes, steel in their depths, “can you help me?” she finally begged.
Sherry just walked to her side, left the photos on the side and helped Kristen to
stand. “You need nothing from here, let’s get the children and go.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff was exhausted, and in desperate need of a shower, calling for Kristen even as
he took in the empty apartment and his mom sitting where his wife should have been.
“What are you doing in here?”
“Waiting for you son.”
“Where’s Kristen?”
“She’s gone Jeff. I helped her to leave.” Sherry was staying remarkably calm, not
sure how Jeff was going to react and then instantly knowing he was going to react
with the same anger and violence he approached the rest of his life. She knew even
as she said what she had done that he would hit her, even as his hand connected
with her face, the same as Gerald’s had, she knew she had deserved every smack
every punch that she was being made to feel. Finally he stopped, the haze of red
lifting, and his momma unconscious at his feet.
“No one leaves a Padalecki.” He spat out to the empty room… well someone just did
it mocked him in return.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It had been Jared’s idea to talk to Christian, a plan that couldn’t fail, and Jensen
agreed. Thing is, Padalecki’s and Kanes mixed like oil and water and so Jared had
made Jensen phone Chris, all the time pacing as he talked. They were now sat in the
parking area for Shooters, waiting for Kane to arrive and Jared felt nerves like he had
never done before, his hands literally shaking at the ease with which he was
prepared to screw his father over. Jensen placed a hand on his husbands, stopping
the shaking with a gentle touch and a kiss he leaned in to drop on Jared’s cheek.
“Stop worrying, he may decide he doesn’t want this, just as much as we didn’t.”
”A Kane not taking the chance to screw with a Padalecki it’s like - “
“Jared stop. Chris is a friend of mine, he isn’t a Kane and you are not a Padalecki
you are my husband.”
”Ackles-Padalecki,” Jared breathed softly, startled as lights swung and shone into the
cab of the SUV and Jensen announced Chris had arrived. Under his breath he
repeated the same thing over and over again, Ackles-Padalecki, Ackles-Padalecki,
Ackles-Padalecki.
Kane climbed down from his beaten up red truck, his long hair loose around his face,
scuffed cowboy boots on his feet and a worn Stetson on his head. He approached
Jensen, bumping shoulders and smiling. “Ackles,” he said simply turning to Jared
and raising an eyebrow, “I didn’t expect him here too?”
“I want to introduce you to my husband.” Jensen said formerly and Jared hastily
extended his hand in welcome, which Chris took without hesitation but with clearly
narrowed eyes.
”I heard you’d tied the knot with him. So does someone want to tell me what this is all
about?”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff leaned in better to hear what was being said. The Ackles girl was pregnant? That
was the most interesting thing he had heard all day. Cracking his sore knuckles, he
swallowed the rest of his whisky in one go and stood to take his leave, thanking his
drinking companions for their company and their news.
Pregnant.
Very interesting.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“So, if we are to make this happen, get you installed at TexOil we need to look at
figures.” Jensen continued carefully, rolling the beer between his hands, the dark of
the far corner of the bar hiding them from prying eyes, “Megan Padalecki has twentytwo percent, Jared the same, Jeff has the forty-eight percent, and we think we can
track down who holds the remaining eight. From what we have managed to find out
today it seems an offshore holdings company has a total of six and the rest is kind of
spread around.”
Chris leaned back in his chair, thoughtful and not seeing exactly where this was
going, still he had something that he wanted to give one of his oldest friends, the
information that Margaret had handed him as he left. “I happen to have access to
some of what you are looking for, information, I’ve looked through it, and I think you
should be looking to Jared’s momma to fill the gaps.”
“My mom?” Jared was confused, and Chris slid the papers over to him, leaning back
to swallow beer in one smooth move and tapping his feet to the rhythm of the music
from the scarred jukebox in the corner. Jensen just stared at the paperwork in front of
his husband, waiting for him to look and frowning as Jared pushed the whole lot
towards him, seemingly unable to even look at what may be more damning evidence
against his family. Jensen lifted it up and opened to the first sheet; certificates, in the
name of Sheriton holdings, a total of just short of six percent, the offshore holding
company they knew about, and Jensen dug further, linking the wording in each
sheet, following the same path that Chris had. Blinking he looked up, meeting Jared’s
confused gaze, knowing his husband was scared of what was in the folder, more
truths about his family, more shovels to dig the grave.
“Sherry Padalecki owns Sheriton holdings, she has the six percent.” Jensen sounded
suddenly excited, remembering Sherry’s visit to the D yesterday and her wish to help
her son. “And if we can persuade her to side with Jared and Megan, just to give a
simple majority, we can push forward with replacing the management team with a
new one, namely your team.”
“Jensen wait,” Chris leaned forward, “ya’all came to me with this idea,” he waved his
hand dramatically, “to force control of TexOil over to a new management team, and
on paper it all works, the equations balance and we could do this. But…”
“But what?” Jared enquired at the pause, knowing inside exactly what Chris was
worried about, what he was questioning.
“It’s simple, I don’t understand why a Padalecki would want a Kane to control their
company, and unless I do understand then I wont be signing anything.” Jensen and
Jared exchanged glances, this didn’t go unnoticed by Chris and he narrowed his
eyes, it was like Jared was asking permission to tell Chris, asking for support in what
he was about to say. He never thought he would see Jensen so entangled with one
person, so obviously in love.
“A way back,” Jared finally started, “I took over the land exploration side of TexOil,
the R&D arm, it was my baby, and it did well. I rode the wave of success and I never
questioned when the exploration and turned to acquisition, that was Jeff’s forte, his
role. I was naive.” He stopped, his hands twisting on the table in front of him, and
Jensen placed a steadying hand on top to still the nervous movements. There was
vulnerability about Jared when he talked about TexOil that made Jensen feel oddly
protective. “I mean, I’m not stupid, TexOil is huge, competitive, a corporation that
wields it’s power with finality. Some of the decisions that were made, made out of my
hands, didn’t sit well with me, on ethical and… emotional… grounds. I always knew I
was wrong at TexOil, like it wasn’t me that was working there, but some stranger
reading from a script, it was… it just felt wrong.” He shrugged, wishing he could string
the words together to explain the depths of his misery working for his family’s
company. “I started to plan my own company away from TexOil, from the ground up,
ethical exploration, ethical land acquisition, that kind of thing. I researched Kane
Petroleum, and your business model was one I admired. I like where you have taken
Kane, and I wanted to do the same to TexOil. I couldn’t, I lost it, any control I may
have, and I don’t think it was ever going to be given to me. Dad gave a larger holding
to Jeff, never gave enough to Megan and I that would mean we could make a
difference. He came up with this contract proposal, gave temporary holdings to Jeff,
citing some crap that I had a year to get married for love, stay married for love, and
then he would re-allocate the holdings more fairly.” Jensen tightened his grip. “I was
never going to be given any kind of control, I know that now.”
“How?” Chris was intrigued in where this was going, he knew all about TexOil and
there less than clean business deals, their bribes, their dubious legal documentation.
“Turns out Gerald Padalecki isn’t my father.” Chris raised an eyebrow, now that was
something new. “He wanted to do everything in his power to stop me from getting
any control at TexOil… but he had a deal with mom to provide me with the Padalecki
name and at least some semblance of ownership.” He raised impassioned eyes to
Chris, “I need to stop them, need to stop TexOil in its tracks and the only way I can
do that is to get my voice to be heard.”
“How watertight is the twenty-two percent you hold?” Chris went to the crux of the
matter, parentage issues aside, he needed to know.
“JD says totally,” Jensen offered simply, Jared nodding his agreement.
“JD Morgan? Isn’t he the TexOil lawyer, can you trust him, is he going to be - ”
“He’s my father,” Jared interrupted, wincing but wanting to be as honest as he could
be, aware he was entrusting one of the men he had never looked twice at before,
with a huge secret.
“Holy freakin’… you Padaleckis don’t do anything by halves do you?”
“Ackles-Padalecki,” Jared said quickly, Jensen smiling thoughtfully and releasing
Jared’s hand to shuffle the paperwork back in the folder.
“Are you interested Chris?” Jensen asked carefully.
“Is a Kane interested in screwing over a Padalecki, no offence Jared, but hell yes.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff sat opposite the skinny guy with bad complexion, feeling dirty by association and
wiping his hands on a paper napkin. He was like a fish out of water, the coffee in his
mug was sludge and the table was scarred and dirty. He shivered at the germs he
was probably touching even just by sitting in the chair. Still this needed to be done.
This had become more than personal.
“The fire was an unfortunate failure,” Jeff began, stilling the other man’s nerves with a
dismissive wave of his hand, “this is a simple observation process, think of yourself
as a private eye,”
”I don’t do observation.”
“You do if I pay you two hundred a day, no questions asked.” He watched the man’s
eyes light up with interest; exploitation of greed was always the best way to win a
war. “I want every movement she makes off of the ranch recorded and reported, I
want your eyes on her and your ears to the ground for anything you can find out.”
He slid an envelope across the scarred top, moving his hand before the other man
could touch him, and simply said, “Ackles, Mackenzie, starting today.”
Chapter 15
Jared found Jensen with Solo-Cal leaning against her stall, lost in thought, the sorrel
mare nudging at his arm. It had been near six weeks since the fire and Solo had
settled into being a momma with ease that had Jensen beam with pride. Her bay
colored foal, named Solo-Alexandra was a beautiful breath of fresh air, her innate
curiosity with life meaning Jared could stand and watch for hours if he had the time
to. Instead Jensen was working him hard on the ranch, deciding that now, in this
limbo time of decisions on Jared’s side he could fulfill the whole twenty-eight days on
the ranch clause of the contract.
So here he was, day five, and Jared had aches in muscles he had never know he
had before. Of course it didn’t help that their sex life was verging on the insanely
physical, neither man able to et enough of the other before collapsing into each
others arms and sleeping the few hours left until dawn unable to even move. They
had fallen into routine, Jensen always offered himself just at the point that Jared was
incapable of saying anything let alone no, and the strength and power he could use
to get them both off was intoxicating. In his head there was nothing better than
Jensen laid out beneath him, begging for more, demanding harder, faster, but last
night something had been different. Something indefinable had switched itself on in
Jared, the need for right now, being replaced with the need for forever, and it scared
the ever living shit out of him. He didn’t even question how he had gone from the
poster boy for het city to craving a man as he craved Jensen. It wasn’t even that it
was just physical; he admired Jensen’s brain, his determination, his love for his
family, his seemingly never ending need to sacrifice his own happiness for others… it
shocked Jared to see the depths of passion his husband had inside him and the
erotic dreams he was having about him didn’t help.
To hold Jensen down, to force him over the edge, to control that… Jared was
envious, and the envy was becoming the only thing he could think about. Jensen was
strong, muscled through manual labour, rough and just ever so slightly dangerous as
he had shown in the bar brawl, and it sent shivers down Jared spine to imagine
submitting to Jensen, allowing Jensen to take him, push him over the edge, fuck him
into next week. Jensen hadn’t broached the subject, they had got close, but the alpha
in Jared took control and Jensen was more than happy it seemed to let him take the
lead, despite topping from the bottom with his counter pushes and his demands.
Jared had researched a bit, if you call wikipedia and various random porn sites
research; the dynamics of a gay relationship were as fraught with potholes and
problems as any other kind of relationship. Thing is, in all the many one night stands
Jared had had, it had been him calling the shots, they had wanted that, these
simpering girls that killed his time. He sighed, how did he go about telling his
husband what he wanted, how did he get Jensen so worked up that he didn’t
question what Jared wanted… just went with it.
He stood for a moment simply watching his husband, his jeans worn and white in
places, his boots scuffed and worn, his denim jacket loose over a Black Sabbath Tshirt and his thoughts a million miles away. He was beautiful, rugged, slim hipped,
broad, relaxed, strong, a study in cowboy if there was such a thing, and Jared shifted
to relax some of the instant pressure in his jeans.
“Hey husband,” he said softly, making Jensen jump and turn to face him, the emerald
in his hazel green eyes so clear in the early morning light, a smile lit across his face.
Jared crossed to pull him into a close one handed hug, aware he was still damp from
his shower, shaking his wet hair in Jensen’s face playfully and watching as the older
man grimaced and punched him on the arm. “Careful, you’ll spill the coffee,” Jared
teased, offering Jensen one of the mugs he had his fingers threaded through. Jensen
fell on it like it was from the gods, inhaling the bitter smell and sighing.
“Did I ever tell you I loved you?” Jensen said as he sipped at the hot brew, wrinkling
his nose at how dark it was compared to what he would make himself. Jared winced,
they had this conversation every morning, the merits or not of black coffee, Jensen
drunk his with milk, Jared had his black but with so much sugar Jensen swore he
could stand a spoon in it.
“Too dark yeah?” Jared smirked.
“People have been shot for less,” Jensen growled low.
Jared leaned in for a good morning kiss, one of many they had already exchanged,
and would carry on exchanging throughout the day. It was like they couldn’t get
enough of touching, kissing, hugging, or just talking, holding hands, exploring limits
for public displays of affection. Jensen only ever said the love word as a joke or
during sex, he never said it with meaning, or not the meaning Jared was starting to
want, but then Jared hadn’t said it at all yet so he couldn’t exactly talk. Something
was missing, he knew everything had started so damn badly, with the worst plan in
history, with Jensen being blackmailed into marriage, but it was good now. Wasn’t it?
They had slipped into a routine that was good, hot, passionate, new, and Jared felt
loved, felt needed. It was just… would Jensen ever really trust him, could he ever
really love him? It amazed Jared how Jensen made him feel so… different…
special… he couldn’t get his head around just how much Jensen seemed to want
him, how Jensen found him sexy, praised him, told him so often how much he
wanted him.
“I’ll be ten minutes,” Jensen offered quickly, handing back the mug and crossing to
Alexandra, the poor thing seemed to be struggling with feeding this morning, and
Jensen was bordering on mildly worried that maybe Solo-Cal wasn’t up to nursing
her baby. Jared nodded, seeing the worry in Jensen’s eyes, the worry that skittered
down his own spine. He adored Alex and her horsey ways, something he would
never have said would happen. In his world horses were for amusement, for
recreation, they weren’t in his hands with life and death, it was an honor and a
concern.
He let his mind wonder as he stared out at the Texas morning, thought back to two
nights ago, Chad and Mac at the table with Anna and Donna, talking weddings, a
simple wedding at the D, in the new barn that was being constructed on the site of
the old horse stables that had burnt to the ground. They had a list of people to invite,
a local band to do music, Jensen and Josh as joint fathers of the bride, Meg and
Anna as bridesmaids, it sounded perfect and Jared lost himself in images of his best
friend in a tux tying himself to the beautiful Mac for the rest of his life, or hers.
“Can I talk to you?” Chad had asked him as the bridesmaids and Mac were
discussing flowers, standing from the table, walking to the door, Jared snapping out
of his thoughts, as he realized Chad was talking to him. He grabbed two beers and
followed Chad out to the porch, the night dark around them, the haze of the Dallas
lights on the horizon, behind them the canopy of stars low to the ground as the land
dipped to the distance. Jared felt peace settle around him like an old blanket, at ease
and relaxed.
“Wassup?” Jared was prepared for anything now, they had done the whole you are a
shitty friend thing, whereby Jared admitted he had been one and Chad had agreed,
he wondered what now…
“I have this favour to ask.” Chad seemed nervous, the only other time he had been
this nervous was when he had approached Jared for the money for Mac. “I want you
to be my best man.” Jared blinked… what… he hadn’t expected that in any way,
shape or form.
“Yes,” he said quickly, “yes, I would be honored…” he didn’t know what else to say,
blown away that Chad had asked him after what he had done… he really couldn’t ask
for a more forgiving friend, and his answer was instant. Chad smiled, pulled him into
a back slapping hug and standing away, still with the nervous looks.
“There’s just one thing Jay,” he said, a hint of hesitation in his voice, “I am being
totally honest with Mac, about my past, things that I have done, people I have been
with, I don’t want any secrets.” Jared thought of his secret-driven marriage and
inwardly thought that Chad was definitely making the right decision, “that starts with
telling her about the money, about the money you gave me for her medicine, for the
visits to the specialist when she became pregnant.”
Jared paled, Jensen wasn’t aware of that, and that had been the one thing that had
got him to agree to the whole arranged marriage idea, that Jared would provide for all
of Mac’s care, putting money in trust for her. He had made Jared promise not to tell
Mac, wanted her to believe it came from the sales of the horses and the work on the
ranch. Shit.
“Shit Chad,” was all Jared could form in the way of a response, leaning back on the
railing, the beer loose in his hand.
“I’m telling her tonight when everyone has gone. She… worries about Jensen and
you… worries at your marriage… worries about you. Despite the whole fire rescue
hero thing, I know there is something there, a hesitation in her whenever your name
is mentioned. I want her to know, as well as the truth, about what kind of man you
really are. That you are not just some playboy Dallas prince with money to burn, but
a genuine person who can be trusted.” Chad looked so earnest, and Jared wanted to
say it was OK, but all he could think of, albeit selfishly, was facing Jensen over this.
Chad squeezed his shoulder, “it will be fine, and Jensen will think you even more of a
hero for helping out his sister.”
Jared hadn’t really believed that, not even as he stood toe to toe with Jensen in the
bedroom, his husband’s temper so close to the surface that Jared could almost touch
it.
“So,” Jensen said, icy calm, his arms folded across his chest, “the one thing that
made me decide to do this, the money for Mac, you had already gone and done that,
and you lied.”
“Yes,” Jared offered nothing in defense, his voice miserable, his heart twisting at
whatever was going to happen next.
“How much Jared?” Jared frowned at the question, and shrugged, “how much?”
Jensen repeated dangerously.
“Four hundred,” Jared finally answered.
“I’ll pay you back,” Jensen said simply, “from the sale of Alex I will pay you back.”
There was determination in his voice and a hard light in his eyes, his face taut with
tension.
“No, it was part of the contract anyway,” Jared said quickly, there was no way Jensen
was paying it back. Jensen took a step closer; so close that Jared could smell the
horses and the Texas sun that was so much a part of his husband. He flinched as
Jensen raised a hand, frowned as Jensen gently touched his face moving to his hair
and twisting his hands into the long chestnut silk that he said he loved.
“See that is the problem, that contract, I pay you back, then the contract is wiped, it’s
not like you have given any of the other money over yet, and I don’t intend taking it.”
“Jensen I - ”
“No Jared, if we want this to last the year then you have to let me do it my way to
start.”
And that there; that single sentence, if we want this to last the year… was where he
knew he had fallen in love with his cowboy rancher, inextricably totally forever in love,
wanting it way past the year he had intended.
And standing here now, watching Jensen deal with Solo and Alex, seeing the gentle
touches he used on the beautiful new life, he knew what he wanted.
He wanted Jensen to take control, if only once, or maybe taking it in turns,
whatever…
…and he wanted to tell Jensen that he loved him.
Jensen was happy Alex was nursing OK, moving back to stand next to Jared and
steal some of his coffee, grimacing as the sugar ran thick and syrupy down his throat,
before the rich caffeine started to hit his taste buds. “Thought we could start on the
barn today if you’re up for it?” he suggested, locking the gate and leaving momma
and baby in peace.
“Yeah,” Jared agreed, swiping the worn Stetson from the hook, his Stetson, the one
Jensen had loaned him, and feeling very much the cowboy in jeans, Tshirt and black
denim button down he followed Jensen to the site of the new barns. Josh had been
over the day before and between him and Jensen most of the debris had been
cleared away before Jared had returned from a meeting with Meg and Chris and
Sherry Padalecki. Today they were moving frames, starting to construct the barn
from ground up, and the Texas heat was warm on their backs. They soon stripped
outer shirts, Jared standing under the blazing sun, sweat sliding off of his skin
soaking his white wife beater and collecting at the base of his neck. He stretched,
reaching his hands to the sky, his skin hot and his mouth dry. He turned to Jensen to
call a water break, wiping the sweat from his eyes with his discarded shirt, and
stopped as he realized Jensen was staring.
”Water,” Jensen said calmly, turning on his heel and moving swiftly to the horse barn,
grabbing at water and tipping it over his head before swallowing mouthfuls of the cool
liquid. Jared followed, reaching for the container and pulling his hair off of his neck.
He began pouring water over his head, allowing it to soak into his hair and pushing
the thick mess of hair back off of his face, gulping down the water that felt so damn
good. He never saw Jensen move, only felt himself being manhandled back inside
the barn, far into the shade where no one could see. Jared tripped and stumbled
even as Jensen tried to steady him, until he found himself flat against wood his
hands scrabbling for purchase. Jensen didn’t stop, pulling Jared’s head down for
kisses, inserting his body between Jared’s thighs, forcing Jared to widen his legs,
bringing him down level, forcing his head back by his wet hair so he could kiss bite
his way down the sweat and water of Jared’s skin. Jared was incoherent, his hands
still flailing, his dick iron in his jeans before he could think, or not think as the case
may be.
Jensen moved his mouth up to Jared’s ear, “do you have any idea how fucking hot
you look in this?” Jensen pulled at the white T-Shirt, pulling it up to Jared’s neck, his
clever fingers ghosting over hot skin, pausing to twist at sensitive nipples, chasing
the touch with his lips and tongue and teeth. Jared whimpered, finally ably to catch
hold of the beam above his head, gripping tight as Jensen explored his body with
groans and touches and desperate need and want. Jensen stepped back, his eyes
taking every inch of Jared standing, legs spread, hands gripping at the beam, his
head thrown back wanting, he almost whined as Jensen had stood back away from
him, for only seconds, but it was too much. “Don’t move… OK… don’t move.” And
with that Jensen ran from the barn, leaving Jared standing, T-shirt loose about him,
and his dick so fucking hard it hurt. He didn’t move, Jensen had told him to stay, and
if it killed him, he was going to stay.
Jensen came back in, predatory, slow, pulling his T-shirt over his head and standing
in front of Jared. Seeing Jared there, like he was tied in place, every muscle pushed
to the limit, it was too much, and he had to touch, caressing, slipping hands over
damp skin, taking a small tear at the neck of the T-shirt and ripping it in two to reveal
his broad chest, settling his lips just above his lover’s left nipple and biting… biting
hard… causing Jared to yelp in pain… but he still didn’t move. Jensen’s hands
closed around the button fly on his lover’s jeans, pulling at them, until he could push
an eager hand in to close round Jared’s weeping, needy dick. With the other hand he
went into his pocket pulling out lube and a condom, holding it out for Jared, imagining
his husband splitting him apart in the dark of the barn.
“Jensen, no” Jared refused, shaking his head, stubbornly holding on to the beams,
Jensen looked puzzled, he thought that Jared wanted… “I want you to do me,” he
rasped, his voice gruff, his breathing harsh.
Jensen didn’t need to be asked again, pushing denim down over Jared’s hips
following the material, passing kisses close to Jared’s dick, biting into his thigh,
licking the marks he had left, helping Jared toe off boots and lose his jeans all
together, until he stood gloriously naked in front of him.
”Turn round,” Jensen ordered, “hold the beams, spread your legs,” his voice was so
broken, yet so determined, as Jared twisted to face away from him, Jensen again
using his denim clad legs to get Jared to spread his. “Beautiful,” he breathed, piling
damp chestnut hair into one hand and pushing Jared to reveal his neck, kissing and
sucking marks he knew would still be there tomorrow. He worshipped skin,
whispered demands, until Jared was writhing under his hands, making his own
demands. Please.
Coating his hand with slick Jensen began to open Jared, torn between being careful
taking his time, and just fucking pushing his whole hand in. Jensen kept up a litany of
words, so good… I’m sorry… so fucking hot… I’m sorry… I love you… hearing Jared
moan in discomfort and then nearly whine with more. One handed he pulled at his
jeans until he had his own dick in his hands, moving to use a condom, stilled as
Jared said two words, no condom. Their tests had both been clear, it shouldn’t matter
to Jensen if that is the way Jared wanted it, but he knew from experience it would
feel easier on Jared if he did.
“Jared, please…”
“No… want to feel… you.”
Jensen slicked his dick, pinching the base as he almost lost it over his husband’s
tight muscled ass, just at the erotic images in his head and the words from Jared’s
lips. The first push was tentative, until he slipped past the tight ring of muscle,
hearing Jared gasp, and stiffen, knowing it was hurting him, even making to pull back
as Jared pushed against him, Jensen moving in a small way, and then it was too
much, he was lost, pulling his lover away from the wall further, reaching around with
slippery fingers to start a counter rhythm as he bottomed out inside Jared and began
to move. He angled to find the sweet spot, tried so hard, only knowing when he found
it by the exhaled gasp and whimper of his name in Jared’s throat. The rhythm he had
set was punishing, biting down on Jared’s corded neck as orgasm started to build to
explosion point. Under him Jared was cursing a storm, demanding harder, wanting
more, and Jensen twisted his fingers around his lover’s dick, upping the movement
until Jared went rigid under him, the feeling of heat and wet on his hand enough to
have him coming hard into his husband. The dark heat of Jared was gripping at his
dick as he pumped into him, only stopping when Jared all but collapsed against the
wall and Jensen followed him, caging him with his arms to prevent landing on top of
him. They stood in the intimate embrace until Jensen pulled himself free, and Jared
turned in the cage, his pupils blown, his face flushed, “Jesus,” he said simply.
“Jensen,” Jensen replied smirking.
“Fuck.”
“We did,” Jensen leaned in to capture Jared’s lips in a hard kiss, his body still
vibrating with the after effects of orgasm, like every single point of his body was alive
with Jared, he wanted to say the words, wanted to tell this gorgeous man, his
husband, that he loved him. He wasn’t sure if Jared was ready to hear that, not
wanting to push, not wanting Jared to know that in his head he saw them growing old
together, being together for as long as they could. It was going to be torture, giving
Jared up at the end of the contract year, he couldn’t even begin to think about it.
Jared pulled back, resting his forehead on Jensen’s and curling his hands around his
neck, “I love you,” he said quietly, so quietly Jensen wasn’t entirely sure he had
heard right.
“Jared?” Please say it again if that is what you said.
“I love you Jensen Ackles-Padalecki, I’m sorry if that makes you feel uncomfortable
but I needed you to know how I felt and-“
“And I love you.” Jensen interrupted, his head spinning with the implications of what
they had just admitted to each other.
Suddenly the year became two years, ten years, twenty… life… and so suddenly,
despite the chaos outside their small world, everything seemed right. Everything
seemed perfect.
Chapter 16
When Meg found her momma, heard her call from Jeff’s apartment she slid to her
knees in horror at her side and shook her head as Sherry made her promise not to
say a word… not one word Megan. Megan helped her to her own rooms, separate
from Gerald’s, got her painkillers and water and sat by her on the bed.
”Did Jeff do this momma?” she had asked quietly.
“No Meg, it was the monster we created that is inside him.”
“Mom, you can’t say that, Jared and I were brought up the same way, and however
dysfunctional that was, well we turned out OK.”
“Meg, there is evil in him, even I can see that, he was never like you and Jared,
always his father’s boy, never mine.”
“If he’s evil he needs to be stopped Momma,” Meg cradled her mom too her, they
had never been close but that didn’t mean she didn’t love her. Jeff was not getting
away with this.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared sat back in his seat, the final papers in front of him, Meg to his left, his mom to
the right, each in their own way ready to make the Padalecki name mean something
with the scratch and scrape of a pen.
Chris stopped him, just as he reached to sign, placing a hand flat on the papers.
Jared looked up startled, blinking at Chris, wondering why he had stopped him.
“Jared, you realize what you are doing here.” Chris asked for what Jared assumed
was the fiftieth time today.
“Chris, this is what we want, we wanna drag TexOil up by its ears and make it
accountable for its standards, we want you in as interim manager, we want you to
organize a management team, we want Jeff’s power cut off at the knees for what he
is doing to the company.” Jared summarized each step with a tap of the pen on the
papers. “Have I covered everything Megan?”
“Chris, Manager, team, Jeff, knees,” think that covers it, Megan replied.
“Mom?”
“I’ve waited too long, watched too many people, good people, get hurt by Gerald’s
actions, and now Jeff’s actions, I want it done.” Jared sketched a look at his mom,
still concerned at the bruises on her face that even makeup couldn’t cover. He hadn’t
asked where she got them after she stopped his concern with a harsh enough, and
Meg had just closed her eyes and shaken her head, leave it. Jared hated that his
mom was hurt, hated that someone had hurt her, hoping to god it wasn’t his dad that
had done this to her, but not knowing who else to blame. And now, sitting here under
the harsh light she looked tired, exhausted, but relieved, and Jared knew what he
was doing was exactly the right thing to do. Quickly he scrawled his signature, JT
Ackles-Padalecki, bold and strong on the line next to his printed name on all three
copies, and soon after Megan added hers and finally Sherry. Jared pushed the
papers towards Chris, feeling like the world had been lifted from his shoulders, he
may still have a 22% stake in TexOil but from this moment on he was a name on a
piece of paper, the real control had passed to Chris and his management team.
Chris paused. It only needed him to add his name to the contract and that was it, he
could go into TexOil guns blazing and clean the house from top to bottom. He stared
into Jared’s confident hazel green eyes, seeing nothing but determination there.
Nothing except relief and calm. Drawing in a deep breath he added his signatures
and closed the file, passing everything to JD who had sat quietly to one side
watching the proceedings, and the Kane’s lawyer who slid copies into files and stood
to leave. Sherry watched them go, the warmth of her son to her side, his strong
presence that had been keeping her in turn strong, and suddenly it was all too much,
the fear she had inside her for him and for Megan just overwhelming, and with a
muttered excuse me she stumbled from the room. Megan made to follow her but
Jared stopped her, standing and following instead. He wanted to be there for his
mom, wanted her to believe that he was here for her, and he caught her at the turn of
the corridor, with a quiet momma?.
She stopped, turning to face her son, tears in her eyes, tracking down soft cheeks,
her expression twisted in grief.
“What’s wrong? Do you regret it, what we just did?”
Wordlessly she shook her head, her hand to her mouth, taking the single step that
meant Jared had her safe in his hold. She leaned into him, so warm and safe, her
middle son.
“It’s a good thing that we are doing here,” she said softly, gripping his shirt and
looking up and back. Jared looked at the bruise on her face, the mark on her neck,
the exhaustion in her face… he needed to know.
“Who did this to you momma?” he traced the bruise and half closed his eyes as she
winced at the touch. “Was it da… Gerald?”
Sherry shook her head, “no, he wouldn’t go this far… Jared… I’m scared.”
“Scared of who momma? Who did this?”
“Jeff… it was your brother Jared.” Jared stepped away from her, his head reeling,
Jeff did this?
“Mom?”
“He isn’t well Jared,”
“Isn’t well? I’ll kill him for hurting you…”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Chris left the office, climbing into the limo and giving instructions to cross the city to
TexOil, Jared sitting next to him, his face blank and his thoughts obviously
elsewhere.
“OK?” Chris asked carefully, he needed Jared to be strong today, to present a
backup, a joined front
Jared looked at him, blinking, “yeah, just… family stuff.” Chris didn’t push any further,
not wanting to pry, not even capable of imagining the headspace Jared was in at the
moment.
They arrived and no one questioned Jared and Chris and the team of five people that
followed them as they passed through the security and on to the bank of lifts.
No one questioned them as they appropriated Jeff’s office in his absence, and shut
down IT systems to be covered by the Kane systems when they rebooted, the IT
specialist rewriting code and reallocating passwords in as many seconds as it took
for Jared to back out of the office and hide in with the stationary close to
hyperventilating.
The lift sounded, Jared peering through the frosted glass of the room’s door and
inhaling as he saw Jeff pass reception. He stepped out, Jeff looking at him oddly,
which wasn’t new to be honest, “hiding in the stationary room little brother, is Ackles
in there?” he didn’t wait for a reply just carried on to his office, stopping on the
threshold.
Jared heard talking, shouting, and closed the distance to stand behind Jeff, feeling
anger radiating off of him.
“As of today Mr. Padalecki, Kane Petroleum control just short of fifty percent of
TexOil,”
“What the fuck, you can’t have them, my family…?”
“It’s true Jeff,” Jared said softly, handing Jeff the contract copy, “we need to ask you
to leave the premises until we get the management team in place and up and
running, then we’ll sort out what your position will be here.” Jared tried to word it
diplomatically, seeing his brother’s brown eyes glaze and harden in shock. Keeping
himself focused on the fact that his brother had hit their mom, keeping his heart
closed to any kind of pity.
“This is our company Jared.” Jeff sounded like he was going to burst a blood vessel,
his lips tight, his voice strained.
“It’s bigger than just us,” Jared replied patiently, moving to one side as two men
flanked Jeff, security. Jeff shrugged off their touches.
“I’ll take these papers to my lawyers.”
”You do that Padalecki, my people will be pleased to hear from your people,” Chris
said simply, and then turned back to his assistant effectively ignoring any response
Jeff may give.
“Just go,” Jared said encouragingly, “we’ll talk later.”
Jeff left, hate in his heart, confusion in his head, no one threw him out of TexOil,
especially not that cowboy hick Kane. And Jared? Well that was the biggest betrayal.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff found Gerald on the sixteenth hole.
By the time they were at the eighteenth hole Gerald was a picture of enraged father,
but inside… inside he just knew Jeff wasn’t strong enough, with his temper and his
sexual perversions, not strong enough to guide TexOil. Maybe he should have put
his money on the bastard son instead. Perhaps it wasn’t too late.
“Dad?” Jeff sounded almost petulant at what had happened, demanding that Gerald
sort it, that Gerald get on Kane Senior and get him his role at TexOil back.
Gerald just turned round to his eldest son, “why in Sam’s hell did I waste my time on
you?”
Jeff was left standing, his mouth open in shock, as his dad stalked to the eighteenth
hole, catching up with his golfing buddies. He was losing control here. He hadn’t
found where Kristen was with the kids; his brother had turned on him. As for
Mackenzie Ackles, well… she needed to learn a lesson. He adjusted his pants as he
half hardened at the memories of her whimpering under him, now her, he had control
over her.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac was fighting to keep herself sane, she was sure she was being watched, felt like
eyes followed her everywhere, and it was starting to get to her. She was level
headed, pragmatic, calm, but for some reason, just now she felt scared, vulnerable
and as she replaced the fuel nozzle on the pump she cast a final look around the
forecourt of the gas station, and hurried into the shop to clear the bill. When she
came back out it was to find a familiar figure leaning against her car, leaning against
the driver door, his arms folded across his chest and a wry smile on his face.
“Miss Mackenzie,” he said nodding his head and tracing a look down her body,
stopping on her obvious bump that she curled her arms around to protect.
”Get away from my car,” Mac managed to form words despite the cold ice that was in
her heart, at the fear that was spiraling up her spine and leaving her unable to move.
“I hear you may have some news for me?”
Mac reached into her bag, fingers hesitating over pepper spray and instead closing
around her cell phone, pulling it out and scrolling for a name. “I have nothing to say to
you,” she managed to half whisper, terror clutching at her as he moved away from
the door to stand toe to toe with her. Craning her neck she looked up, images from
the party digging like knives into her eyes… fear and terror and tears, and pain, so
much pain. She saw his hands move, hover an inch above her bare arms, the static
hissing around her as she imagined he would touch.
With a smile that Mac could only describe as evil he leaned down to whisper six
words in her ear, bring bile from her stomach. She couldn’t move, couldn’t talk,
wanted to scream, push him away, knowing how solid he was, how he could
probably lift her and throw her to one side. Chuckling softly he sauntered back to his
car, climbed in, and with a wave drove off in Dallas direction, leaving her shaking and
terrified. Pressing the button she had selected she started to cry even as Chad’s
voice came on the line.
“Mac?”
“Chad… help me.”
“Mac? Mac… where are you?” She managed to blurt out where she was, shivering
the words in haphazard mindless chaos and she heard him say things, important
things… stay where you are… I’m coming….
Her fingers were shaking so bad she dropped the cell, clutching her stomach with
one hand, the other resting on the scar that twisted across her chest, her breathing
shallow.
Six words.
“I’m gonna come for what’s mine,”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Chad made it in ten minutes, his heart in his mouth, his head spinning, the baby, she
was losing the baby, her heart, she was dying… he wasn’t going to make it in time…
she was going to die… He had the presence of mind to shout his fears to Jensen
down the phone, who didn’t even reply, Chad knew he was on his way, knew Mac
would need both of them.
He arrived at the gas stop to see a large man leaning over Mac who sat huddled on
the ground next to her car, arms around her legs, rocking and sobbing. Chad
immediately pushed him out of the way, “what the fuck are you doing?”
The large man stepped back, his hands raised, “I work here, I was just asking her
what’s wrong, I saw it from the window, I was just looking out for her.”
Chad wasn’t listening, dropping to his knees next to her, listening to her repeat over
and over… he cant have her, he cant have her, he cant have her…, desperately he
pulled her hand away from her knees, encouraging her to sit up and she jerked
upright, a scream in her throat, terror in her eyes, scooting away from him even as
she seemed to realize who it was and instead fell sobbing into Chad’s arms.
“Mac, god, what happened?” She couldn’t answer, sobbing so loud it hurt.
“I saw some guy, real tall, talking to her, and then he left and she just kinda
collapsed,” the attendant said quickly, “you want I should phone 911?”
“NO,” Mac cried desperately, clawing at Chad’s arms, as he tried to sooth the tears,
“take me home,” Chad didn’t hesitate, scooping her into his arms and standing,
starting to cross to his SUV and helping her into the passenger seat, buckling her in
as she grabbed at him to stay. “Don’t let him take her,” she said, mindless of who
was listening, or what Chad could understand.
Chad shook his head, “who? Mac who?”
“The baby, he wants her, says he is coming for what is his.” Chad suddenly, very
clearly, understood exactly what she was trying to say. She hadn’t told him who the
father of her daughter was, saying he was nothing, saying he was meaningless to her
and her daughter, but Chad needed to know. He couldn’t fight a ghost.
“Who, Mac? Who.”
”I can’t… he said that he would… I can’t...” Chad stopped in his actions, only
momentarily, but enough for Mac to understand. “Don’t hate me Chad, please.” She
looked so lost, small, so convinced he would want nothing to do with her, want not to
touch her.
“Mac, I could never hate you, I love you.” He said simply, filing away the hate and the
need to kill for much later.
Jensen barreled into the station, out of the truck before the engine really died, and at
Mac and Chad’s side in seconds.
“Is it the baby? Mac, is it your heart?”
“It was him,” Chad said simply, “the father of the baby.”
Jensen looked confused, reaching in past Chad to touch his sister, making sure she
was OK. She just looked at him blankly, Jensen had never seen so much pain in one
person’s eyes. “Mac?”
She couldn’t speak at first, couldn’t even look her brother in his eyes, scared of the
disgust she would see there. She lowered her eyes, clutching at Chad’s hand, “he
says he wants my baby, says he’s gonna come for her.”
“Who Mac… who?”
“He said I couldn’t… said he would hurt me…”
“He cant hurt you Mac, we’ll keep you safe… talk to me…” this from Jensen, her big
brother, half of the big brother team that looked after her, kept her wrapped in safety,
she could tell him everything.
“I didn’t want it Jen…” she clutched at his hand, looked up at the brother she adored,
“… you gotta believe me… I didn’t want to… he wouldn’t listen… I said no.” Jensen
rocked back as the implications of what she was saying filtered through her grief
stricken words… she was raped? Someone forced her?
“It’s OK Mac, it’s OK… tell me…”
“It was Jeff… Jeff Padalecki.”
Jensen staggered back; anguish distorting his features, Padalecki… Jeff…
He looked at Chad, they exchanged heated looks and Chad gathered a weeping Mac
in his arms. Jensen wanted to climb in his SUV and drive to find him, kill him, but
Mac needed to know, Mac needed to know it was going to be OK first.
Leaning into the car it was all he could do not to cry, reaching in a hand and touching
his baby sister on her cheek.
“I love you Mac, it will be fine. Everything will be fine. Don’t worry, he can’t touch
you… I wont let him...” images of Jared flipped through his mind, this was going to
destroy his husband, “we wont let him.”
I’ll kill him before he touches my niece.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Chad said he was taking Mac back to the ranch, for Donna, shut the car door on his
fiancé and turned to Jensen. Chad knew where Jensen was going, now he was sure
Mac was going to be with his mom and Chad.
”Should you get Josh as well? Chad asked simply.
“No, not today” was all Jensen said in reply, his voice even, dangerous.
Chad wanted to stop him, not for fear for Jeff, but for fear of how much trouble
Jensen could get into and half of him wanted to go with Jensen to see Jeff.
“Promise me Jensen… that you remember your family, your husband… what you
have… you remember.”
Jensen nodded, crossed to his truck and left. Chad watched him go, his heart heavy,
his head still numb with shock, he climbed in to the car, leaving Mac’s car at the
pump, promising someone would be over to get it soon.
He arrived back at the D, handing Mac over to Donna who suggested that Chad give
them a while. He paced the kitchen, murder in his heart, and with a final decision he
grabbed his keys and within minutes was on the main road pointing back the way he
had just come.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen turned into the Padalecki mansion, not stopping for security on the gate or
the lone paparazzi that loitered around the front his lens not at the ready Jensen had
arrived so fast. Jensen had murder in mind, he was going to strip skin from Jeff’s
body an inch at a time for what he had done to Mac, seriously, inch by bloody inch.
When he screeched to a stop outside the main door he didn’t leave the truck parked
straight, or worry about blocking anyone in, it was pure adrenalin and passion that
pushed him in through the front door, shouting Jeff’s name. Turning on his heel as
Jeff appeared from the breakfast room, his tie perfectly tied, and his suit just so, his
hair carefully groomed, looking like butter wouldn’t melt.
“Good morning brother in law,” he said calmly, as Jensen just got more and more
tense until the red mist descended on him like a suffocating blanket. He didn’t give
Jeff another chance to speak, his fist contacting with Jeff’s jaw in a satisfying crunch,
forcing Jeff’s head back, following it through with another punch to his temple,
another to his neck, his chest, pushing the taller man, countering every hit that Jeff
tried to make back, until his fists throbbed with pain, and blood splatter haphazard
marks to the pristine walls. Someone grabbed his wrist, forced him away from the
whimpering bleeding man laying on the floor, and Jensen turned to his new attacker,
Jared, pulling his arm from Jared’s grip he pushed past him to land a couple more
blows, this time closing his hands around Jeff’s neck, feeling the life under his fingers
weak and pathetic. Jared used his entire body to force him away from Jeff, prising his
hands free from Jeff’s neck, and shouting at Jensen, shouting that Jensen couldn’t
hear over the beating of his heart, over his complete and utter fury.
“Jensen stop… what the fuck…” Jensen snapped out of it, pushing back and away
from his husband, sickness inside him at the man that lay on the floor.
“He raped Mac, your brother raped my sister, and is now threatening to take the baby
from her. Tell me I can’t kill him Jared.”
Jared stood horrified, sickened at what Jensen was saying, shock making him turn
back to his brother battered, who was bleeding and crying on the floor, trying to crab
walk backwards away from them, terror in his eyes. He didn’t want to believe it… that
this man he called brother was capable of rape and of hitting their momma, he didn’t
want to believe it… couldn’t… then he turned to Jensen who leaned on the wall,
blood on his face, his shirt, and the utter loss in his hazel green eyes was damning.
“No…” he said… one word… not a word of disbelief… but of denial… Jensen
straightened against the wall, his eyes bright with temper.
“Fuck you Jared,” he spat, throwing open the front door and half running to his truck,
he couldn’t handle this.
”Jensen, fuck, wait, I didn’t mean… shit…” he caught up with Jensen as he reached
the door of his truck, pulling at his arm, forcing him to wait. “Jensen, he nearly killed
my mom, he beat her unconscious…” his words tailed off, he wasn’t sure what he
was trying to say, in his head it had sounded better, “killing him is not the way Jen,
please… we need to talk to Mac… see what she wants to do.”
“He… he touched my sister… Jared we need to call the cops… my beautiful sister…”
the last was a plea, a plea for Jared to see why… to see what was bringing Jensen to
his knees.
“We’ll go home Jensen. We’ll talk to Mac… please listen to me… if we get the cops
involved now for any of this then Mac is dragged through the papers, her life
becomes open to all, the baby will be known as being conceived through rape…
Jensen… you have to let me deal with this inside the family. For Mac. For my mom.”
Jensen bowed his head, his head knew what Jared was saying made sense, but his
heart… his heart was broken. He climbed into the truck, starting the engine, glancing
back at the mausoleum of ice that held the man he wanted to kill. “I’m gonna go for a
drive, get my head straight, I’ll be at the D in an hour.”
Jared nodded, watching as the man he loved drove away, turning to face the house,
and wondering what the fuck he needed to do now.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jeff half crawled his apartment, passing a maid on the stairs who simply looked at
him in horror and then turned tail and ran, Jeff knew that there was only three staff
here today, that at least one of them had probably heard the whole thing, and that he
would have to dig deep into his pockets to keep that one quiet. No sense in people
knowing how Mac got pregnant, just that he was a daddy and he would have her
when she was born, fucking fag brother in the way or not.
He shouted down at the small women, “go home, all of you, just go home, I want this
house empty in ten minutes.” She nodded; scurrying off to god knows where to carry
out his bidding, the familiarity of ordering his staff around felt strangely settling.
He watched as they left, in their cheap cars, going home to their shabby houses, and
then he washed off the worst of the blood in the bathroom, the water running red,
then pink and then finally clear. It seemed most of the damage was internal, his
breathing harsh, his chest heaving with pain. Fucking bastard Ackles, he was gonna
die for this.
Steel shot though his spine as he straightened and in his head he started to consider
ways in which Jensen could meet an untimely end, maybe with brother dearest sitting
next to him when it happened… maybe a car accident, another fire…
A noise behind him made him turn, and he looked in disbelief at the gun, and the
person holding the gun.
“You?” he said simply… aware he was a dead man.
The bullet left the gun and entered high on his chest, he was unconscious and
bleeding out before he hit the floor.
It was finished.
Chapter 17
Jared couldn’t bring himself to go in to the ranch, he stopped his SUV at the gate,
under the twisted D’s, and rested his head on his hands. How was he going to be
able to face the rest of the Ackles, after what Jeff had done, how could he look Mac
in the eye ever again? Jensen had been destroyed, had murder in his hands as he
tightened them around Jeff’s neck, and god knows, Jared just wanted to let him
finish, but that would have been the cowards way out to have let someone else deal
with Jeff. No he had needed to deal with all of this himself. He had managed to get
Jensen to hold off, to leave it, what they needed to do now was talk to Mac, talk to
Donna, understand what Mac wanted to do… shit how was he ever going to be able
to have Chad call him friend, when his brother had…
Grief knifed through him and he couldn’t stop it from manifesting into the utter
blackness that was consuming him. He was slow to temper, always had been, but
what Jeff had done… how could he.. how… Jared couldn’t begin to understand. Mac
was so small, so delicate, so young… Jensen’s sister, pregnant… he was going to be
an uncle again… something could come from this… something positive, seeing Chad
so happy, so in love… the child may have been conceived in hate but all it would
ever know was love…
He sighed, that was of course all dependant on whether Mac and Chad, and Jensen,
would even let him be part of the little one’s life. He caught the flash of metal out of
the corner of his eye, Chad’s car pulling into the D, not stopping, just going straight
past Jared with single focus, and in a singular moment of decision Jared turned on
the engine and followed his best friend to the main house. He arrived as Chad
climbed out, to stand looking up at the sprawling ranch house, something akin to
shock on his face.
“Chad?” Jared said carefully, but Chad didn’t turn, “Chad?” this time Chad turned on
his heel to face Jared, his skin pale, his eyes staring and scarily empty.
“Sorry Jay, didn’t see you man,” he said simply, running a hand through his short hair
and sighing. He looked devastated, lost, in shock, and Jared reached out a hand to
touch his friend, Chad moving out of reach at the last moment.
“Chad, I’m sorry - ”
“What for?” Chad seemed genuinely puzzled, “it wasn’t you it was your brother, your
half brother.” With that he left Jared standing in the sun climbing the steps to the front
door and going inside. Jared stood for a while longer, what he was waiting for only
became obvious as Jensen’s truck came to a stop next to his SUV and Jensen
climbed out, his eyes red with tears and his face as white as Chads. Jared didn’t
move. Jensen didn’t move. They just looked at each other, Jensen leaning back
against the door of his truck, before bowing his head, his shoulders shaking with
grief. Within seconds Jared was there, holding his husband, being strong for him
when Jensen couldn’t be strong for himself. He held him for a long while, until Jensen
could breathe properly, knowing they needed to go inside, knowing they would be
needed.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac wouldn’t look at Chad, wouldn’t touch Chad, and Donna just stood, loosening
the grip her daughter had on her. “I need to go and find your brothers,” she said
quietly, cupping her daughter’s face and looking into liquid green eyes, “talk to him
baby, he loves you.”
Chad sat down on the bed next to her, his hands clasping at hers, “Mac?” she tried to
pull her hands away, but he held them firm, she wasn’t going to hide, he wouldn’t let
her.
“You made me feel loved, beautiful again, and now all I am is ugly.” She forced out,
her body heaving with anguish, her hands on her belly, “and now I have this thing in
me…” she spat out, then almost immediately raised wide eyes to Chad, “oh god, I
didn’t mean that, Chad… my baby…”
Chad just pulled her in close. His hand over hers. Joined over their baby. “You are so
beautiful to me, and our baby is just that. Ours.”
“Can you forgive what happened?” Can you forgive me? Can you love me still? It
was almost as if Chad could read her mind, sense the unspoken words, his gaze
softening and his lips warm against hers as he began gently kissing his love onto her
skin. Each kiss punctuated by whispered words, I love you… I love our baby… we’ll
be such good parents… make her life so good… we’ll be fine…”
She just had to believe it to be true.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jensen phoned Josh, telling him to just get over now, not telling him anything else,
and then he sat, stony and quiet listening to his mom and Jared talking softly. They
were discussing what should Mac do, what should they all do, would Mac want this
dragged through the courts, how else could Jeff pay… Jensen looked at his bruised
knuckles, remembered the feel of his fingers around Jeff’s neck, the sense memory
as hard as his heart, blackness where emotion should be. He felt numb, only wishing
Josh was here to help him, the two of them could… no… what would that do to
Mac… to have her brothers in prison for murder?
Josh brought the Texas day with him, in suit and tie, a briefcase in his hand and a
frown of concern on his face when he saw Jensen as still as death and his momma in
Jared’s arms.
“Is it Mac? What’s wrong? Is it the baby…” no one said a word…
“Josh, we need to talk.” This from Jared, who suddenly seemed to be the only one
capable of rational speech. “It’s Mac, we know who the father of her baby is. It’s Jeff,
my brother Jeff.” Jared pushed it all out there in one breath, Josh widening his eyes
in shock and looking to his brother for confirmation. Jensen closed his eyes, inhaling
a deep breath, not wanting to push this on Josh, but knowing he had to be told. “It
wasn’t consensual Josh.” Jared finished and Jensen released a breath he didn’t even
know he had been holding, waiting for Josh to react. All Josh did was leave the room,
making for the study, Jensen following, until saw his big brother unlocking the gun
case, pulling out the rifle and grabbing at shells.
It was the same impulse to kill that had cut through Jensen, it wasn’t right; he had to
make Josh see. “No. Josh please.” He blocked Josh, tried to get the bullets off of
him, tried to stop him, finally standing in the doorway, the only way out of the room,
Jared a hulking presence behind him.
“Out of my way Jensen,” Josh said calmly, looking over his brother’s shoulder at the
brother of the man he wanted to kill.
“No, Josh, we need to talk to Mac,”
“Out. Of. My. Way.” He pushed past Jensen, Jared made to stop him, but it wasn’t
his place, he had stood as back up, but to actually stop Mac’s brother from doing
what he himself had wanted to do… how could he rationalise that?
Josh almost made it to the door, almost made it out to the daylight with murder in
mind, but Mac was there, standing in the kitchen in the sunlight, tiny and pregnant
and with her spine straight and her shoulders back. “Josh.” She said simply. It was
enough. It defused his anger immediately, replaced it with an odd mix of despair at
feeling so helpless and admiration at how his sister stood so certain and brave in
front of him. Chad moved to stand next to her, his arm around her protectively and
Josh winced that Chad thought his baby sister needed protecting from the anger in
her brother. She leaned into Chad for strength, knowing she had disappointed
everyone.
“Josh I’m sorry,” she offered quietly, closing her eyes, waiting for the accusations, the
how can you let this happen… the whys…
Josh froze for a mere second, then took that step forward, the rifle clattering to the
floor as he released the death grip and pulling her away from Chad he gathered his
sister into his arms. “Don’t you say that Mackenzie, don’t you ever say that you are
sorry.”
Jared reached blindly for Jensen’s hand, holding it so damn tight it hurt. He wanted to
hug Mac, wanted to make her see he wasn’t Jeff, make her see that he was different,
only he was so damn scared he was on the edge of losing it all. Jensen seemed to
sense the need for touch, bumping shoulders gently and then just waiting for Josh
and Mac. Finally Josh pulled back, cupping Mac’s face with his hands, “is the baby
OK? Are you OK?”
“I’m fine Josh,” she replied, “and the baby is fine,” taking Josh’s hand she placed it on
her belly alive with the kicks of her daughter, softly smiling, “she is here and she is
fine.” She looked at Jensen, at her mom standing in the doorway, age and worry
creasing her face, and then back at Josh. Where would they go from here?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The 911 call was anonymous.
Made from a payphone in the city… there’s been a shooting… Jeff Padalecki is dead.
That was it. The entire message. Delivered in a monotone, no emotion there at all. A
woman’s voice.
When dispatch sent the paramedics they found a body, a tall man, his face and torso
red raw with bruises and cuts, obviously beaten and beaten hard. They found a bullet
wound that had missed the heart by the breadth of a hair. They found a man very
close to death.
Unconscious, but still alive.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac didn’t really have an awful lot of friends outside of her family. Years of hospitals
and doctors will isolate even the most gregarious of people, and so, when Megan
arrived at the D it lifted Mac’s heart to see her. She arrived with concern marking her
face, Jared called me, said you needed me? Said he wanted to talk to me?.
Mac just burrowed deep in her arms, it was heaven to have a friend, not much older
than her, who seemed to instinctively know what to do, holding her close and just
stroking her hair. Jared came to stand next to Mac, she saw him out of the corner of
her eye. She knew he was struggling, knew she should reach out to him as well and
tell him she didn’t blame him, but the nerves inside her stopped her. He was so tall,
like Jeff, so strong, confident, imposing, he wasn’t Jeff but she didn’t have the
emotion left in her to make that distinction with any clarity, even though she knew she
was making it worse for him. He sat at the kitchen table, a picture of misery, of anger,
of murderous intent, and Meg encouraged Mac to sit, still holding her hand, Chad
and Josh hovering expectantly, Donna boiling the kettle and busying herself to keep
herself focused.
“Can anyone tell me what is going on?” Meg said confused and frowning. No one
said anything. How the hell did anyone word this without it coming out wrong? Finally
it was Jared that spoke.
“Jeff is the father of Mac’s baby, he…” Jared paused, raped her, forced her, stole her
innocence, “… took advantage of her,” he finally said, his hands clenching into fists,
knuckles white with tension. Megan paled, turning to Mac, what could she say, it
didn’t make sense, yes jeff was a man she had learned to hate, but rape…
“Mac?” Meg couldn’t understand why everyone was sat here like this, just waiting,
why wasn’t anyone out there doing something? “Did you call Dallas PD?” no one said
a word; everyone seemed to be avoiding looking at her. “Jared?” She saw Jared
flinch, saw Jensen frown and open his mouth to speak, before shutting it again and
subsiding into more brooding.
“I don’t want to tell anyone,” Mac said firmly, “I don’t want my little girl to grow up
seeing reports that she was a product of rape, I will tell her,” she clasped Chad’s
hand and he crouched down next to her, “…we will tell her what we can when we
can, but I wont take it any further.” At this Jared made a choked off sound, pushing
his chair back and stalking out of the kitchen, the door slamming behind him. Jensen
made to stand, but Mac stopped him, pushing herself to her feet and squeezing
Chad’s hand carefully. “I’ll go, it’s my demons he needs to face,”
Carefully she made her way down the steps to the front of the ranch house, seeing
Jared leaning against the fence, watching Solo and her foal in the open paddocks.
He was hunched over, his hands supporting his head on the wooden frame, and Mac
knew she had never seen him look so beaten.
“Jared?” startled he looked up, stumbling as he stood and catching hold of the white
wood to stop himself from falling, a look of embarrassment on his face, here was
Mac, standing in front of him, determination and peace on her face.
“I couldn’t stay in there,” he said simply, “I’m sorry… I couldn’t look at you… no… I
couldn’t let you see me…” he sounded confused, disorientated.
“Why couldn’t you look at me Jared?” Mac leaned into him, her small frame warm
against his arm. “Am I different to you now?”
Jared looked horrified at the thought, “no, god, just… no… what Jeff did…” he
started, then stopped, choked, not even sure where to start.
“It wasn’t you Jared, and it wasn’t Megan. It was your brother, a man that you really
only have biology in common with.”
“He’s not a man,” Jared spat out immediately, “he’s a monster.” Mac just nodded in
agreement, kind of slipping under Jared’s arm, and gripping to his T-shirt, Jared
looked down at her, quietly amazed at how brave she was for a woman child with
such weights in her life.
“Promise me one thing Jared?”
“Anything. Whatever I can do…”
“Be a good Uncle to this little one, and above all… love my brother as he deserves to
be loved.” Jared pulled her in tight, tears pricking at his eyes as he looked over her
head at Solo and Alex in the paddock.
“Both of those things Mac… they’re easy.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Detective Welling arrived just as the paramedics were leaving, his partner already
there scribbling notes and talking to the CSIs who were hovering.
“Thought he was still kicking?” he said, indicating the scene investigators who only
turned up to corpse cases.
James Lafferty turned to him, “the call we got said he was dead, CSI got the heads
up from DPD that there was a 10-87, hence their beating your lazy ass here.” he said
this with a cautious smile, knowing the pressure that his partner was under with his
ex and the whole divorce debacle. Tom just shrugged, he didn’t need to say a word,
knew James always had his back.
“So, bring me up to speed,”
“Jeff Padalecki, shot once, through and through chest wound, beaten badly,
unconscious, but very definitely alive when he was loaded onto the meat wagon.”
“Who called it in?”
”Down town payphone.”
“Security Cameras at the phone?”
“On it already. Message not recorded.”
“OK, do we have family here, witnesses?”
“No one, house is empty, staff missing, we have a call out to his wife.” James led his
partner up the stairs, Tom noting the blood splatters on the hall wall, on the wooden
floors, a bloody smudge half up the stairs, until finally they turned into some sort of
set of linked rooms, decorated in muted blues and greys, a man’s room. “Forensics
have closed the room he was found in, but we have blood in a sink, blood on the floor
where the body was found.”
“So he gets attacked, beaten, hence the blood in the hall and on the wall of the stairs,
then he comes to his room to wash off the blood, his attacker follows him…” Tom
paused, looking at the entrance to the sprawled apartment, and possible angles, his
hand held out in front of him like a child would pretend to have a gun, “… one shot, to
finish him off.”
“Sounds plausible I guess. Thing is… why would someone take the time to beat him,
for him to then clean himself up and for that same person to then shoot him?” James
indicated the Rolex on the table just inside the door, the cufflinks and a wallet…
“looks as if robbery wasn’t the motive, despite the rich pickings.”
“So, crime of passion then… scorned lover… wife... girlfriend… revenge maybe?”
Tom offered, in summary, just the kind of cases he usually loved, intricate, a web of
reasons why someone was attacked. Today though, was not a good day, and a case
that needed brainpower was gonna be hard. Maybe he should have taken the boss’s
suggestion of a holiday as a way to get his head straight.
What he didn’t need on top of having the ex wife from hell was a case that was going
to hit the papers before he even had time to breathe. James answered his cell,
nodding and answering, before sliding it closed; “nada on the wife T, but we have a
contact for his brother. The mother’s details are signed to this mausoleum so no
trace there.”
“Brother it is then, put a call in, then hospital.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac gave Jared one final hug, standing back and looking up into hazel green eyes
filled with remorse and sadness.
“I’m gonna go in and let Jensen know you are OK, he’s in there worrying like a
mother hen, an’ I’ll send him out.” That brought a smile to Jared’s face, and he
relaxed back against the railing, instinctively as his cell started to vibrate in his pocket
he reached in and slid the case up to answer the call even as he watched Jensen
jump down the steps to reach him.
He said little in response to the caller, acknowledging his identity and nothing else.
Carefully he ended the call and slid the cell back in his jeans, horror growing in the pit
of his stomach and beginning to spread out through his body.
“That was Dallas PD,” he said deceptively calm, Jensen frowning at him.
“About Mac? What?”
Jared felt the horror reach his heart, the disbelief at what he had just been told, at
what Jensen had done… “It’s Jeff… he’s been shot… tell me Jensen… please… tell
me it wasn’t you?”
Chapter 18
As soon as the words left his mouth he wanted to pull them back, seeing how Jensen
stiffened in shock. He didn’t think Jensen had done it, but everything that had
bombarded him in the last few days, everything with his brother… he thought he had
known his brother and look how that turned out. This shooting… fuck… shooting…
was just one more thing that was being thrown at him, and it was all he could do to
keep functioning on the autopilot he seemed to be on. His father wasn’t even his
father, his brother was a rapist and now, to top it all, he had gone and fallen in love
with a man. And now someone adds to this whole steaming pile of crap that his
brother has been shot and he simply had nothing left to react with. He just felt numb,
like his head had decided for him, no more…
Jared tried desperately to concentrate on one thing, he wanted to understand, to
figure this out, but it was as if all he had in his head was white noise. His heart felt
heavy and all he wanted was someone to deal with this, to take it away, and then
Jensen, standing there in front of him… please don’t let him be involved… he isn’t
involved… it wasn’t him… but I can’t lose him.
The cracks were starting to show and he couldn’t stop it, he was shaking, he knew he
was, and he could feel the sickness rising in him. The complete shock at what they
had told him started to trickle down his spine as he looked helplessly at Jensen,
waiting for him to speak. His head couldn’t make sense of any of it, reliving Jensen’s
hand wrapped around Jeff’s neck, choking him, temper and violence whipping
around him like a storm. Just tell me it wasn’t you… please…
Jensen said nothing at first, processing what Jared had said, hearing the worry and
fear in his question, the complete shock, the pain, the questions and the anger.
Knowing it would destroy his new husband totally to lose Jensen to prison on top of
everything that had happened he knew Jared didn’t speak out of belief, but out of a
desperate prayer to not lose Jensen. “I didn’t do it Jared,” he said simply, his voice
completely devoid of pretence or guile. Calm. His hands out flat in front of him and in
peace… see me… I am here…
Jared just nodded, his heart suddenly twisting, “I know… I know… but Jeff… he’s at
Mercy, they’re going to see, going to know what you did, they’ll have your blood, your
DNA… it’s all over him…”
Jensen stepped forward, cutting off Jared’s scared words with a finger to his lips, “I’ll
be honest, I’ll tell them what I did, and I’ll tell them I didn’t shoot Jeff. It’s the truth.”
“But Mac… you cant tell them why you…” Jared’s voice tailed off, Mac didn’t want to
press charges, didn’t want it made public… hysteria started to bubble inside him…
out of control… and he couldn’t concentrate on one thing out of everything in his
head. Jensen could see Jared slowly losing it; this strong man was losing hold on his
sanity inch by painful inch and he decided someone needed to take control.
“OK,” he started firmly, his hands on Jared’s upper arms, giving him a small shake as
he spoke, “we get Meg, we go to Mercy, we see what has happened, get the facts,
see who has been assigned to this case, I’ll come clean about what I did and get my
wrist slapped. Simple as.”
Jared realised at that single moment that he really didn’t give a shit about how Jeff
was; on being told he was alive but unconscious, didn’t even want to go to the
hospital. Why should he be responsible for a man that was nothing more to him that
a relative by blood. His thoughts immediately turned to Jensen, how Jensen could be
accused as a murderer, how his blood would be on Jeff, how Jared had seen the
fight, was a witness… Confusion crashed over him, shouldn’t he be more worried
about his brother? What was Megan going to think? Jensen lowered his hands,
grasped Jared’s tight, the cell hard between them, “Jared, listen to me… stay here,
OK? I’ll get Megan.” Jared felt himself nodding, allowing Jensen to help him. Needing
Jensen to help him.
When Megan stumbled down the stairs, Jensen trying to support her, Jared held
himself straight, watching as Donna and Josh hovered by the door, not knowing what
to do. She ran the small distance to the fence and Jared just opened his arms, pulling
her in and holding her close.
”He isn’t dead Meg…” he kept repeating, not sure why he was saying that. He
thought he caught her saying when will this end? and he hugged her tighter, knowing
exactly how she was feeling. When would it all end? This nightmare that he seemed
to be caught in, the nightmare Meg was in… Mac… Jensen… so many people being
hurt again and again by the name of Padalecki.
”Do we have to go and see him?” She sounded so young as she clung to her brother,
and like she was a feather he picked her up, and sat her atop the fence, lifting her
chin to look into hazel eyes, so like his own, his mother’s legacy he guessed. They
were swimming with tears, and he sensed Jensen handing over tissues, standing at
his side, a calming presence.
“Do you want to go and see him?” Jared asked softly, not really wanting her to say
yes.
“Is he unconscious?”
“They said he was being taken into surgery, that the bullet was near his heart - ”
“He doesn’t have a heart.” Meg interrupted quickly, a sudden mask of determination
on her face. If her brother could do this, then she could too. “I don’t want to see him.”
Jared nodded; hefting his cell phone and flipping the cover, redialling the last cell
number received and waiting with icy calm on his face. Megan looked confused,
Jensen made to speak, but Jared hushed them with a raised hand, until finally the
call connected. They couldn’t hear the other side, but what Jared said was enough
for them to know what was being said.
Jared Ackles-Padalecki… no we decided not to… nope, we don’t plan on it… I’ll
contact Jeff’s dad… no… if you need that then we are at the Double D… the Ackles
ranch off of… OK… He closed the cell, leaning in and burying his face in his sister’s
hair, looking for something normal, a familiar smell, a familiar touch… just looking for
peace. “He wants to speak to us all… this detective in charge of the case, Tom
Welling, he’s bringing his partner… we should expect him in about an hour.” He said
calmly, glancing over at Jensen, who just nodded, closing his eyes and sighing.
“I’m gonna go keep Mac company,” Megan said softly, “you gonna be OK Jay?” To
an outsider it may have looked odd, this tiny slip of a girl looking up at her brother,
broad in the shoulder and a good foot taller than her, asking him if he was going to
be OK, but to Jared it meant everything. He smiled softly, using his thumb to wipe
away tears collected on her cheeks, she was his sister, and she was his to look after,
but she had an incredible strength in her that was sometimes his only anchor to the
real world.
“I’ll be fine.” He linked hands with Jensen, “we’ll be in soon.” Megan reached up on
tiptoes placing a small kiss on her brother’s stubble-rough skin.
“Love you big brother.”
“Love you little sister.”
Jensen watched her go, half understanding the conflicting emotions that must be
running through his husband, knowing he wanted to protect his sister from the world,
not wanting anything to do with Jeff. It was all mixed in with his hatred of what Jeff
had done, with his own fears for Mac, he wanted to help Jared, but he needed Jared
to help him too.
Carefully he started to pull Jared away from the fence, past the paddock and to the
back to Solo’s old barn, back to where he had had Jared naked and spread for him,
holding on to the beam, begging Jensen to make him feel. Jensen didn’t want that
now, not at this moment, didn’t need lust, or fire, or fucking… he needed to touch, to
remember the good in amongst all the bad. They didn’t say anything, not even as
Jensen pushed Jared back into the corner, back into the shadows, and started to pull
at clothing, uncoordinated, clumsy. They didn’t exchange a word when Jared stopped
Jensen’s fingers, pulled his own shirt off, his own t-shirt, his own boots, jeans, and
boxers, finally standing naked and hard in front of his husband. Jensen shook himself
out of staring, realising he was doing nothing productive, just watching as each
muscle moved, as each inch of golden hazel skin was exposed to his gaze. Slowly
he stripped off his clothes, finally standing as naked as Jared, his hands reaching to
touch, Jared stopping him, grasping at his hands and bowing his head.
“Jared?” Jensen’s voice was liquid gold, Texas slurred and wary. Was this so wrong,
to need Jared now? Did Jared not want this?
“I never expected to love a man,” Jared said softly, raising his head, his face tired, his
eyes red rimmed, and his lashes spiked and thick with tears. He would never before
have thought to cry in front of another man, but he was stripped bare, literally and
figuratively, and everything he had to offer was here in front of Jensen. “I didn’t think I
could, that it was possible…” he added carefully, placing a hand flat to the side of
Jensen’s face. Jensen turned his head to kiss the palm and then pushed into the
hand like a cat, his eyes half closed. “But in all the things that are wrong…” he
stopped, “Jensen… this is right… is that what I should be feeling? That this seems so
right?”
“Jay, I can’t tell you how to feel, I know that I feel like I have been waiting for you all
my life.” He took a step forward, bare skin against skin, both hard, both so lost in
each other’s thoughts. Jensen could taste Jared’s tears on his lips, taste the dark
heat of him as he deepened the kiss, his hands moving to trace hip bones, and round
to Jared’s lower back, resting on the dip, one hand stopping there, the other moving
to brush across hard nipples.
Jared sighed into the kiss, they didn’t have long, but he needed this more than
breathing, this gentle reminder of what he had. The sharp cut of passion and need,
made him move, subtly at first, and then with more insistence against Jensen. They
had nothing here, no slick, no plans for making love in their barn, and Jared knew the
score, knew what would happen, Jensen falling to his knees at his feet and sucking
him down, doing what Jared had yet to do. Several times he had come close to doing
the same thing to Jensen, kissing near, touching, licking, but never going the whole
way. He wanted Jensen to see how committed he was, how much Jensen was loved.
He started to drop kisses to Jensen’s neck, biting and sucking small blooming marks
into his freckled skin, using his hand to tilt Jensen’s head to one side, following the
kisses to his pulse and down to the hard nub of his left nipple. He used tongue and
teeth to worry at the small mound, his hand twisting and stroking it’s mate, soaking
up the sighs and moans of his lover as Jensen pushed into the exquisite pain
pleasure of the small bites. Jensen was lost to the sensation, his head thrown back,
his dick hard and weeping, wanting Jared’s hands on him, wanting to fall to his knees
and suck Jared dry, wanting… everything. It shocked him when it was Jared who
moved to his knees in the straw, drawing Jensen out of his fantasies at the tentative
touch of Jared’s mouth, just circling the tip, licking the pre come and sucking gently.
“Jar… fuck…” was all Jensen managed to push out, leaning back to grab one
handed to the stall side, the other hand twisting in Jared’s hair. Gently he pulled his
husband’s head back, the hot mouth leaving his dick and Jared’s suddenly uncertain
face looking up, “you don’t havta…” Jensen said on a breath, trying to be noble,
trying to give Jared the chance to back away, but Jared didn’t. He simply
repositioned, sliding his hot wet mouth as far down as he could, the difference in
length made up by Jared’s clever fingers, jacking Jensen as he sucked him in
rhythm. Jared had never felt so powerful, Jensen a pleading incoherent mess above
him, and he moved his finger back to trace Jensen’s heavy balls, leaving the taste of
his dick to draw them individually into his mouth, softly rolling the weight of them and
wetting his fingers at the same time. He followed what Jensen did to him, his hands
cupping and rolling, his mouth tight on the hard length of his lover, suction tight,
movements faster, deeper, and he stroked fingers against Jensen’s ass, finding the
spot he needed, pushing, rubbing, insistent, and he could feel Jensen’s hands
gripping in his long hair.
Jensen couldn’t look down, so close; knowing that seeing Jared’s lips stretched
obscenely wide around him was going to be enough to finish him. He was on that
precipice where he wanted to come, but the sensation was too damn good to come…
he didn’t want to lose it… wanted it to last forever, and he started to talk, trying to
settle his orgasm even as it curled in the pit of his stomach and the base of his spine.
“God Jay… your mouth… your… Jared… nuuhhh… I’m gonna come… Jared…” he
tried to pull Jared away by his hair but his husband was having none of it, if anything
he just sucked harder, the counter rhythm of his hands and his fingers creating a
sensation that Jensen knew there was no backing down from. With a strangled groan
he came down Jared’s throat, into his mouth, sharp, hard, his hands tightening with a
frightening grip, hearing Jared whimper around his dick… not being able to stop
himself.
Finally Jensen released his hold, pulling Jared to stand, looking up and back into a
face smug with pride, and it was too much, Jensen just pushed him back, flat on the
wall, grabbing at Jared’s hard straining dick, setting a rhythm of twisting and pulling,
Jared’s expression of pride changing to one of fuck… jeez… now… in the blink of an
eye. It wasn’t going to take much, he was already so close, and as Jensen closed his
hard teeth around the corded muscle of his neck, it was enough to send Jared
tumbling over the edge into oblivion with a muffled shout, swallowed by a hot sticky
come-slick kiss. He panted into his release, his orgasm washing over him in waves,
hard sweat sheened skin sliding against him, murmured praise against freckles and
bite marks.
It was Jensen that said it first, but Jared repeated it, a litany of confirmation, that they
were in this together, that there was nothing they couldn’t do if they were together. I
love you… I love you… I love you...
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It was a tense two hours, watching this Detective interviewing the family members,
Jared and Megan and the finally moving on to Jensen, who sat quietly at the table
and explained exactly what he had done.
Welling made notes, Jared Ackles-Padalecki, brother of the victim, no alibi, the last
person known to have been with his brother; Jensen Ackles-Padalecki, the husband
who for some reason, Tom knew, wasn’t being entirely honest about why he had
beaten up Jeff Padalecki. Again, Jensen, no alibi, was driving, no witnesses, both
men had access to guns, both licensed to carry. And then there was Megan; clearly
distraught, but constantly looking to her brother for strength.
Interesting.
He made notes on the family dynamics, knew enough about the Padaleckis from
news items as to who was missing from here. Gerald Padalecki, father, missing.
Sherry Padalecki, mother, missing. Kristen Padalecki, wife, missing.
He also recalled Jared’s phrasing in the phone call, Jeff’s father, a slip that maybe a
less observant man wouldn’t have caught, but he had caught it. He turned to James,
closing the notebook, his eyes carefully scanning the individuals standing in the
kitchen.
“I’ll need you to come downtown tomorrow and make a statement to the intents of
what you just told me,” he said to Jensen, who nodded and pressed his lips together
in a tight frowning face. Tom knew he needed this on record. If Jeff woke up after the
operation then he would probably want to press charges; his badge was telling him to
take Jensen now, no alibi, blood already on his hands, but his gut feeling was telling
him that there was more to this story. “It’s simple enough to check through traffic
cams, if you can detail your drive as close as you can.”
Jensen’s heart sank; he had been mostly driving inanely, not really with any
destination in mind, “I’ll try to remember,” he said finally, waiting for Tom to order him
to car, waiting for the cuffs.
Tom stood, turning to Jared, “I need to speak to your mom, your dad and your sisterin-law. Do you have any ideas where they would be at this moment?
“Dad, try the eighteenth hole at the Oaks, Mom, I have her cell, I have left a
message, you have the number now, and Kristen,” he shrugged, “she left Jeff, mom
may know where she went.”
“If you should hear from any of them I need to know.” Tom finally offered, before
thanking Donna for the coffee, and indicating James should follow him out. It was
only when he was outside that he breathed a sigh of relief, his head pounding from
an intense headache right across his eyes.
“You OK?” James looked concerned.
“So many secrets,” he said simply, “the Dallas aristocracy and their freaking
secrets…”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The door opened carefully. It had been three days and Jeff, despite coming through
the operation, remained unconscious and in a coma. The doctors had told the family
that it was fifty-fifty for him to wake up. The news had hit Jensen hard, he was
pleased one minute, he wanted him dead for what he had done to Mac, then the next
minute he wanted him to live, didn’t want to be responsible in any way for a man’s
death.
Jared was quietly calm, had been talking seriously about renewing their vows, this
time for real, on the ranch, and Jensen could do nothing except agree. At the end of
the day, if he was going to be in prison he wanted people to really know it was all
real.
The paparazzi were using longer lenses, blurred photos of Jared and Jensen hitting
the news stands and the internet, with comments that Jared hadn’t visited his
brother, that Sherry was still missing, that Kristen was still missing. It was all too
much and it was Jensen’s turn to freak out.
When the silent figure stepped inside the room, it was with Jensen and Jared at the
front of their mind. At the pain this man could cause the two men, of the things Jeff
had threatened he would do if every one of his demands and instructions weren’t
followed to the letter.
When they spoke it was to an empty dark room, the only rhythm the noise of the
monitors and the machines keeping him breathing.
“You should have died. Why didn’t you just die?”
Chapter 19
JD Morgan stood in the hospital room, his words echoing in the sterile emptiness, his
eyes half closed as he considered what the hell to do next. One way or another this
needed to be finished.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The previous night…
The knock on his door was unexpected and very loud in the stillness of his
apartment, and it was with not a small amount of irritation that he opened the door,
ready to sound off at the drop of a hat. If it wasn’t one thing it was another, if it wasn’t
his son’s brother being in the hospital unconscious, it was Gerald freaking Padalecki
demanding his presence at everything from meetings to golf games. Gerald knew JD
was Jared’s dad; JD didn’t need to say a word, there was too much water under that
particular bridge to even go there. They would, in the same way as they had done for
over twenty-five years, ignore the elephant that was in the room every time they
spoke. JD had made promises, and he intended to keep them, but he wanted to
know his son, more than the closeness he already shared with Jared, he wanted a
family connection. His head was tight with headache; it was Jared and Jensen’s vow
renewal in the afternoon of the next day and he was desperate to get some sleep,
even if to look halfway human for this most important day in his son’s life.
“What,” he bit out as he opened the door, wincing as Megan Padalecki launched
herself at him, gripping at his shirt, her head buried against his chest, sobbing
uncontrollably. Pushing the door closed he eased her back from him, seeing grief so
deeply etched in her face it scared him. “Megan what is it? Is it Jared?” She couldn’t
speak, couldn’t get words past her breathing, gulping air, and shaking her head, no…
not Jared. He knew he wasn’t going to get sense out of her, guided her to sit on the
sofa, disentangling her hands and fetching her water, before sitting on the coffee
table in front of the sofa and just waiting.
Finally she seemed to calm, looking at JD, her eyes steady, “I need you to help me…
can you help me?”
JD frowned, of course he would help her, she may not be his daughter by blood but
she was every bit as much his as Jared was in every way that mattered, “help you
with what babe.”
“When Jeff…” she stopped, her teeth worrying her lower lip, her expressive eyes
filling with tears again, but this time without the shaking he had seen in her.
”When Jeff what?”
“I was there… in the house.”
“You were there? Did you see something? Megan?”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The day of the shooting
How was it Jeff has the capacity to hurt her so much? She was Megan Alyssa
Padalecki, heiress, socialite, confident, her own woman, but with a few well-chosen
words her oldest brother could bring her to her knees. She tolerated him, just this
side of hate, always had done, always will do, the perfect pseudo -Gerald with his sly
intolerant elitist mannerisms and his icy uncompromising grip on his sister’s life.
“What’s up Meggie? Someone piss in your Jimmy Choos?” It wasn’t much, but it was
enough to push her to snap back with a simple and effective fuck you. She had been
staring listlessly out of the window at the manicured lawns beyond, her mind turning
over Mac being pregnant, her new friend positively glowing with the evidence of what
had happened to her, Chad so completely in love with her, so attentive. It sent knives
of envy through her, and she had found herself simply standing, clutching at her own
stomach, as if she could touch the phantom child that had once been there. Jeff
knew which buttons to press, which words to use that pushed her down, that kept her
quiet and docile in his control, and she let him… it was easier that way.
He crossed to her, his face a mask of pure enjoyment, and she sighed inwardly,
knowing what was coming.
“You thinking ‘bout your boy?” he said quickly, not flinching when she rounded on
him and dropped her hands to her sides.
“Which one Jeff? The one you killed that loved me, or the one you killed inside me?”
“Now now, baby girl, you know I didn’t kill him or your baby, your>boyfriend got
himself killed, probably being some tattooed biker’s bitch in county, and as to the
bastard you carried… well that was a good thing in the end, don’t you agree? I mean
look at your life, you wouldn’t have had your life as the wife of some penniless admin
clerk with a brat clinging to your legs, now would you?”
This was an old argument, seven years old, too old to matter to some… but to Megan
it mattered more than breathing, and today, with her brother so happy, with the
memory of seeing her friend lit up with her pregnancy, with the images of her mother
bruised and beaten by her son in her mind, it was too much, and steel shot through
her spine. “Ben loved me, he wanted to marry me, I was having his baby, we could
have been happy.” She said simply, her voice clear, her heart twisting in her chest
and her eyes filling with tears, “but you wouldn’t let me have that would you? Not
even that.”
“Baby girl,” Jeff started smoothly, clasping Megan’s chin and forcing it back to look up
at him, “I thought we had agreed we wouldn’t talk anymore about this? You would be
able to keep your whoring out of the spotlight and I would deal with it.” Megan tried
not to feel intimidated or scared, but Jeff was so damn tall, taller than Jared, and
strong, and he had hardness in his eyes that spoke of dead things. She hated it when
he called her baby girl, like she didn’t have a name, like she was one of his
playthings. She was confused, she had loved Ben, loved her baby, but Jeff, standing
here, Jeff made it all sound so plausible… Ben was a TexOil employee, beneath her,
but she had wanted him so badly, and she had loved him… she had. How did Jeff do
this? How did he turn that love and make it seem wrong even now?
“You hit me… I fell… the baby…” she almost whimpered, the steel in her spine slowly
disappearing as Jeff moved closer, almost pinning her to the wall, his gaze settled,
calm.
“You want I should do it again baby girl? Make sure you know where you sit in this
family?” eyes wide she shook her head, no… don’t hurt me… and she found herself
hunching down. Satisfied he pulled back, she was so easy to control it almost made
him laugh. He moved away and Megan saw his retreating back, a sob on her lips,
and her stomach in fearful knots, and she remembered the strength and grace Mac
had in her, at the bravery she had shown.
”No, you wont hit me again, I’m not some sixteen year old girl that is scared of you
Jeff, and I’m telling Jared what you did, I’ll have someone who will be on my side,
who will believe me!” She shouted after him, her fingers curling behind her into the
windowsill, and Jeff stopped in his tracks. Meg tensed, waiting on words, waiting on
movement… anything. He turned, a predatory smile on his face.
“You gonna go running to brother dearest?” He began softly, “tell him how an
employee who stole from TexOil, fucked his little sister and left her pregnant with a
bastard child at the age of fifteen?”
“No,” she shook her head, trying to clear the memories, imagining Jared holding her,
giving her strength, “it wasn’t like that, he didn’t steal anything… I know he didn’t, he
loved me and our baby.”
“It doesn’t matter if he did or not now does it? I sorted it and he’s dead.”
“He did love me, he did…” Megan could feel her grasp on reality starting to slide, old
familiar feelings washing over her, panic, loss, she needed Jared…
Jeff crossed back to her, running fingers from her cheekbone to her throat, where
they settled over her pulse, pushing gently, a smile on his face as his sister’s eyes
widened in fear. That was better. He felt a powerful jolt of conviction that he was
strong, as she whimpered under him and he thumbed her pulse with a quick touch,
feeling the quick inhalation of her breath.
“It was so ridiculously easy baby girl, money to the right judges and a crime that
would normally have got a slap on the wrist sent him to County, as quick as you
could blink, then it was very easy to arrange things so he wouldn’t come sniffing
around you again. Your big brother sorted it.” She whimpered again under his hold
and he released her watching quietly pleased as she slumped back against the wall
at the corner of the window. There. Sorted. But no, she had to go and say more
things; more shit he thought he had shoveled to one side.
“You were so angry that day,” Meg said softly, her voice hoarse with unshed tears,
“you hit me, and you pushed me, you made me fall. My son, it was you that killed
him, and you killed his father, there must be…” her voice tailed off as recognition of
what she was saying filtered through to her brain, oh my god, “…I am going to make
sure you pay for this, somehow, Jared will-“
“Jared what? He’s a waste of space, a playboy with nothing in his head except
money, what the hell do you think he is going to do to help you.” The last he spat out,
daring her to say a word, starting to get annoyed that this was even being discussed,
it really was a waste of his time when he had a bed with a hot whore waiting at the
Palms hotel.
“He is my brother, he will…”
Jeff snapped, grabbing at her arm so hard she yelped in pain, leaning in he spat out
what he wanted to say. ”Do you know how easy it would be to take Jared out of this
equation? How easy I could bring Ackles down, destroy this so called marriage? It
would take nothing more than a few phone calls and some money and that fag of a
brother of yours would be gone. Do you want me to do that?” Megan tried not to cry
out in pain, his grip tightening, and it was all Megan could do to shake her head, she
adored Jared, she didn’t want him hurt, it wasn’t fair to do this to him, when he was
so happy…
“No…” she finally said, “…you’re hurting me… please Jeff… I’m leaving… I wont say
anything… I promise…” she whispered low and dark, cursing at her cowardice, at her
decisions, ducking under his arm as he released her and fleeing the room, her ears
burning at the chuckling sound that followed her.
She collapsed in a heap next to her bed, tears of exhaustion and fear falling from her
eyes, silent sobs that made her curl into a ball on the floor, and how long she lay
there she didn’t know, but finally she stopped crying, her decision made. She would
tell Jared none of this, she would share it with no one, and she refused to let one
brother she hated destroy the brother she loved. Shakily she stood, crossing to her
bathroom and scooping cold water to cool her heated face, only hearing the shouting
as it grew louder from downstairs. She couldn’t make out much, thuds, grunts, the
sounds of fists on flesh and she crept to the landing, her hand over her mouth as she
saw Jensen beating Jeff, almost killing him, and Jared running in, trying to pull his
husband away.
“Jensen stop… what the fuck…” Jared shouted, holding him back, looking down at
Jeff, gripping tight to Jensen.
“He raped Mac, your brother raped my sister,” Jensen’s voice was broken, and Meg
nearly ran down the stairs, “and is now threatening to take the baby from her. Tell me
I can’t kill him Jared.”
“No,” Jared said… and she heard Jensen reply fuck you before stalking from the
hallway, Jared running after him, leaving Jeff a bloody mess on the floor. What
should she do? Should she call 911? She was a witness to what Jensen had done…
but Jeff had raped Mac? Was threatening to claim the baby? Meg whimpered
stumbling back to the rooms closest to her, her momma’s rooms, fragrant with
Chanel and roses, and closing the door behind her she grabbed at the phone,
pressing 911, her fingers hovering over the green connect button. Jensen’s words
chaotic and violent in her head… not another baby… I cant let him hurt another
baby….
She moved to the door, hearing Jeff dismissing staff, crossing to Meg’s room, calling
her name and then the noise of him going down the corridor to his own rooms,
cursing and blinding as he did.
She was on autopilot, her hands unsteady as she moved to her momma’s safe
behind the portrait of her granddaddy, pressing the combination her mom had
drummed into her. The gun is in here Megan, you’ve had some lessons, if you feel
that your family is threatened you get this gun and you point and you shoot, you hear
me girl.” The fourteen year old inside her remembered every word her momma had
said, every single little word, and the weight of the gun in her hand was familiar and
safe, inserting the bullets a routine that felt recognizable and easy. Jeff was
threatening her family, promising to destroy Jared and Jensen, take Mac’s baby… a
baby… but she could stop him… she could make this all go away…
Clumsily she exited her momma’s room, the cold metal in her warm hands reassuring
and heavy. He couldn’t hit her if she pointed a gun at him, he couldn’t touch her, hurt
the brother she loved, hurt Mac’s baby, if she was strong…
She stood inside his door, a sound alerting him to her presence and he turned, faced
her, and then… he smirked… just stood there and fucking smirked… you he spat, no
small amount of derision in his voice. She didn’t stop to think, the bullet leaving the
gun as easy as a thought, carving into Jeff and pushing him back to the floor.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Now
JD leaned forward, “the gun, where is the gun Meg?”
Shakily snapped back to the here and now, she reached into her purse pulling out
the weapon that had been the destruction of it all, dropping it to the floor in distracted
horror at the feel of it.
“Christ. You were carrying it with you?” JD couldn’t believe what he could see in front
of him, couldn’t even begin to comprehend what Megan had done, what she had
been through, but she looked at him, hazel eyes pleading.
“Help me JD. Please tell me what to do.”
Helplessly he bundled her into his arms and moved to sit behind her on the sofa,
pulling her back. The midnight hour cloaked them in darkness, and he simply held
her as she wept and finally fell asleep in his arms.
There had to be a way.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
So now he stood, looking down at the man that had destroyed so much, so many
lives ruined for his own selfish gains and JD wanted to grab a pillow and just place it
across the man’s face, push it down so Jeff took his last breath. There wasn’t one
single shred of humanity in the unconscious bastard, Jeff knew that, but like Megan,
he was no killer. There had to be another way. Ignoring every sign in the hospital he
pulled out his cell, thumbing contacts, the beep of the machines a chorus of knocks
to his confidence, until the man answered.
“Morgan.”
”Gerald we need to talk.”
They arranged a meet, and JD left ten minutes before Jeff regained consciousness.
Fifteen minutes before a nurse found him muttering and turning in his semi conscious
state.
Thirty minutes before Jeff said two words as clear as day. The identity of his would
be killer.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared was the first one up this morning, Jensen asleep and curled on his side, knew
he would wake soon and come to find him. To be fair Jared hadn’t actually fallen
asleep at all, too much spinning through his head. He was exchanging his vows with
Jensen today, with his family and friends around him, a much better man than he had
been mere months before. He felt no nerves, only an incredible sense of peace that
started in his belly and ended up curled around his heart. He was promising his life
and his heart to Jensen and it felt so right he could almost weep with the emotion. He
sensed Jensen arriving behind him before his husband even said a word.
“Hey,” Jensen said, as he slid into the circle of Jared’s arms, offering him coffee and
smiling almost shyly.
“Hey,” Jared replied softly, capturing Jensen’s mouth in a soft kiss and pulling back to
look into hazel jade eyes soft and warm with sleep.
“It’s a big day.” Jensen observed carefully, wondering why his husband was standing
so alone out here as the Texas dawn painted the sky with muted hues.
“A day we will remember for the rest of our lives,” Jared said softly, “I wondered… in
bed… I couldn’t sleep… is this right? With Mac pregnant and Jeff in the hospital and
Kristen missing… should we be - ”
“If you ask should we be doing this I may have to beat you into submission.” Jensen
smiled at his own joke, pleased when Jared smirked back, shadows lifting from his
eyes.
”Like to see you try,” he offered and laughing, they leaned into each other and looked
out over the land that was the D, lost in thought and contemplating the day ahead. It
was Jared that saw the lights moving inexorably towards the ranch house. A car.
Both men moving to greet whoever it was, Jensen frowning as Detectives Welling
and Patterson climbed out of the car, weapons drawn, looks of determination on their
faces.
Jared half smiled, saw the gun, saw the purposeful look in Welling’s eyes, then the
next was a blur, strong arms pulling Jensen away pushing him against the car,
Welling’s partner cuffing Jensen, words spinning in the morning air… Jensen Ross
Ackles… right to remain silent… right to an attorney… do you understand these
rights… What was happening here, why were they doing this? The single moment
was crystallized in front of him, Jensen resigned, quiet, Welling’s partner with Jensen
dragging him back, Welling standing between him and Jensen… stopping Jared from
stepping forward.
“No… wait…” was that his own voice? Jared couldn’t tell, Jensen swearing as he was
forced into the back of the car, “No…” he finally shouted pushing forward, Welling
standing firm, gripping Jared’s arms, his face calm and understanding.
“I’m sorry Mr. Ackles-Padalecki… Jared… please work with me here… I can’t stop
this… your brother is awake.”
Jared stood rooted to the spot, shock cutting into him like knives; shock and disbelief,
then in a sudden lunge he made to wrestle Jensen away from the other cop, slipping
past Welling in a practiced move, his hands almost reaching before he was body
checked, Tom pushing him hard against the front of the car, shouting at him, “You
are not helping Jensen here Jared. Leave it, follow us to the station… just leave it…”
Jared struggled, desperation giving him the edge, heaving and twisting until he
turned the situation, Tom now the one pinned to the car. It was Jensen’s voice that
stopped him, loud and clear from the car. “Jared no… call Josh… call JD… it will be
OK.”
The fight left Jared as quickly as it had started, and he released his hold on the
detective, his face white, and his thoughts scarily blank. “He didn’t do anything,” he
said simply, pleading in his eyes as he looked into Tom’s face, seeing a flare of
understanding there before it was pushed behind the mask of a man doing his job.
“Jared,” he began, “your brother gave us a name. He identified Jensen as the
shooter.”
Chapter 20
It was a new dawn when Gerald arrived at JD’s apartment, the dark of the hallway
and the silence of the block was unnerving. To get a call from JD in the middle of the
night, he guessed it must be something to do with the whole Jeff situation, and he
wondered if JD was going to admit to having shot Jeff himself, although for the life of
him he couldn’t fathom any reason why he would have done anything like that. He
knocked on the door, only having to wait mere seconds before JD ushered him in
and closed the door behind them.
“What is so god fired important you got me here at five am?” Gerald blustered,
decided the best defence was an offence, turning suddenly in shock at a small voice
behind him.
“Daddy?”
Gerald couldn’t believe his eyes, his Megan here, in JD’s apartment, sleep mussed
and red eyed. His mind went suddenly blank, was JD making a statement somehow
by sleeping with his daughter?
It was as if JD could read his mind, hurrying to reassure him, “Megan was upset, she
came here for help.”
“Here? She came here for help?” Gerald felt sudden remorse stab through him that
she couldn’t have turned to him for help… and help with what exactly.
Megan seemed terrified, looking for JD to her daddy and back again. “Uncle J, why is
dad here?” Her voice was shaky, and it took only moments for Gerald to piece it
together, the energy to stand leaving his body in one sharp exhalation of breath.
“Megan?” He said, his face pale, his eyes suddenly wide with fear at what he wasn’t
hearing. He watched as unconsciously she moved towards JD pressing into his side,
letting herself be led to the sofa, and he waited.
“Sit JD, we have some things we need to tell you…”
Gerald listened, he learned, he stood, he sat, he couldn’t stop himself from shouting,
then from apologising, then feeling sick to his stomach. He had had another
grandson? Megan had been pregnant… how far along… twenty weeks… who… who
helped you… Jeff did… JD watched as Gerald, normally larger than life, seemed to
visibly diminish in size before his eyes until he finally sat on the sofa next to his
daughter, an arm around her protectively, encouraging her back to bed, we will take
care of this Megs, but you must promise to never breathe a word of this to anyone….
When she was in the bedroom, JD stood, his eyes narrowing as Gerald asked him
for the gun.
“Why do you want the gun?”
”I want it away from Meg, trust me JD.”
JD looked down at his cell as it vibrated on the table, Jared’s name on the screen,
and he dismissed the call quickly, not willing to let Gerald leave as he seemed to
want to. “How do we fix this?” JD said softly as he watched Gerald shrug on his
jacket, seeing the man’s face carefully blank, lined and grey. “You are losing TexOil,
the scandal will be enough too… if it gets out that Megan shot her brother…” JD
stopped, he didn’t know what else to say.
Gerald took a deep breath, “I think have wronged you in this life JD,” Gerald began
softly, “for nothing more than money, and the need to win. But… know this… I
respect you. You have been a good employee, although I know you only stayed to
watch over your son, and you have been a good friend to him. Without your
influence, with just his brother and I as role models… well he would have been just
another Jeff, with his vices and his vicious manipulations. I wont let Megan get hurt in
this…”
“How can you stop her from getting hurt, she is already on the verge of breaking.”
With all the money I have I still can’t buy time, and when I die any secrets I have will
go with me to the grave.” He said enigmatically, JD looked alternately blank and then
confused, but Gerald pressed on, “I’m not getting any younger, you promise me, look
after her JD… and Jared… you make sure they stay safe and well, and leave me to
deal with what has happened in the time I have left.”
“Gerald… this is stupid talk…”
Gerald just half smirked that familiar Padalecki smirk and moved to open the door,
the gun safely in his jacket pocket. He turned to face the man who was going to have
everything now, his family, peace, and he wondered what he could say. “I lost sight
of it all, I cheated Alan out of everything, I lost Donna, I didn’t love my wife, and I
drove my children away. I just wanted everything my way, I wanted the family to be
safe and financially sound, I wanted it with a passion, that one thing that seemed
elusive. I wanted to be happy. I know it doesn’t excuse anything I have done, or said
in the past, but if it means anything, whatever I do next is for Megan and Jared and
for Sherry. Can you make sure they know that?”
“Gerald…” JD had one last question, his eyes taking in how frail Gerald seemed just
since the last time he saw him, “are you OK?”
”I’m fine, I just need enough time to make it all right.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared was out of his head with worry, he couldn’t contact JD, and he was following
the cop car to the station across the dead landscape of downtown Dallas, empty of
it’s usual rush and purpose, silent. Josh had left immediately he heard from Jared,
said he would meet them at the station, emphasised with more curse words than
Jared had ever heard come from his brother-in-law’s mouth.
When he arrived he wasn’t allowed through the same entrance, the door closing in
his face, his last image of an impassive Jensen being led down a corridor his hands
still cuffed behind his back, and in a fit of anger he smashed his fist against the heavy
wood door, before turning and leaning back, trying to figure out which way to go. By
the time he got to the front of the station Welling’s partner was there waiting, a look of
expectation on his face, his stance solid and guarded.
“What the fuck is going on?” Jared spat out.
”If you’d like to take a seat, we will be out to talk to you when we can,” Patterson said
calmly, he probably dealt with irate husbands every day, Jared thought bitterly,
crossing his arms and mirroring the same calm stance.
“I’ll wait,” he said carefully, “but you have gotta know, my husband did not shoot my
brother.”
Patterson inclined his head and nodded, dismissing Jared’s words and indicating a
room marked for waiting and turning on his heel pushing past the doors marked
secure area. Briefly the flash of an idea hit him, an idea whereby Jared pushed the
door whilst it was still open, found Jensen and dragged him out, an idea dismissed as
soon as it was made. Instead he started to pace, outside the room, counting the time
until Josh would arrive. He was a lawyer, he would know what to do, and damn it
where was JD. Ignoring the no cells sign he dialled JD again, leaving another voice
message and hanging up as Josh barrelled in through the front doors.
“What the fuck Jared?”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Gerald stood for a moment next to his car, looking up at the sign for the private wing,
the Padalecki wing, a donation from way back, carefully turning the gun over in his
pocket and holding it tight. He had no real idea of what he was doing, or what he was
trying to achieve and he had to steady his breathing before he went in, the early
morning air welcomingly cool on his hot skin.
Finally he walked in, nodding briefly at the nurse on duty and the security guard who
sat at her side, no one stopped him, no one would dare too, it was his wing.
“Mr Padalecki, we have been trying to contact you, it’s good news sir, your son
regained consciousness for a short while earlier.”
“Excellent,” Gerald heard himself say, turning to the room, not wanting to hear
anything else.
“Sir, the police that were with him, they left, said you should call them when you can,
that Jeff managed to talk to them and that the case has taken a turn for the better.”
She was obviously reading from notes, not realising the pain that was knifing into
Gerald as he listened to what she said. Was he too late?
Straightening his back he just nodded and turned for his son’s room, pushing open
the door to the litany of beeps, his eldest child deathly white against the sheets,
tubes and machines pumping nutrient and painkillers into his system. How easy
would it be to dial up the morphine, or maybe pinch the tube for the oxygen? He had
seen it done in movies, subtle murders… but… he had the gun. The gun that was
cold and hard and very real in his pocket, an ideal solution, one bullet direct to the
heart, no missing, no thoughts… just instant death. It took only moments for Gerald
to close his hand tight and start to pull the weapon from his deep jacket hiding place,
there was no decision to make other than the right one, but how long he stood there,
an hour.. two… the nurses bustling around him attending to his son even as he
contemplated his son’s death.
The noise in his head was harsh, the confusion around him quick and deadly, as
suddenly Jeff started to convulse, arching and fitting, alarms in the room alerting
staff. Gerald just stood, the rush of nurses and doctors around him, pushing him back
out of the room, give me ten of… charging… I need… and he stood outside the door,
the sudden silence inside as everything was as still as death.
I’m sorry Mr Padalecki, he was just too weak… we tried… time of death… Oh eight
twenty two… sorry…
Gerald left in a daze… what had just happened had made it so easy.
He slid into his car, sliding the gun onto his lap and carefully wiping it of all
fingerprints, Sherry’s, Megs, his own. Then gently he held the gun as if to shoot,
pressing harder, pushing his prints and his prints alone onto the weapon. Finally he
wrapped the gun in a T-shirt from his gym bag and placed it on the passenger seat.
And now he had only one other thing to do.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The interview room smelt of coffee and sweat and Jensen was uncomfortable in the
hard seat. Welling hadn’t said much, simply repeating the Miranda and then passing
Jensen coffee he sat down opposite.
“At Oh seven thirty this morning Jeffery Ryan Padalecki identified that you, Jensen
Ross Ackles-Padalecki, did with intent to kill, shoot Mr Padalecki at close range.”
Welling summed up briefly, and then stopped, simply leaning forward in his chair and
grasping his coffee in his hands, a thoughtful look on his face. “Talk to me.” He
added almost gently.
Jensen didn’t know what to say, so he said all he could say, “I didn’t shoot my
husband’s brother.”
“He says you did,” Tom pointed out, “and lets be honest here, you have already
admitted to grievous bodily harm, and you have no alibi as to your whereabouts after
you left the Padalecki mansion.”
“And I say again, I did not shoot Jeff Padalecki.”
Tom sat back, his face carefully blank… pausing… looking at Jensen’s steady hands
and the shell of shocked but grim determination on his face. “So,” he began carefully,
“Tell me why you attacked him in his own home, why you beat him up?”
Jensen shuffled in his chair, clearly uncomfortable, “we already did this.” Jensen
answered stubbornly.
“Not under Miranda we didn’t,” Tom shot back, a glint in his eye as he leaned
forward, seeing those words impact the prisoner, seeing his full lips tighten, and his
green hazel eyes darken.
“I have nothing to add,” Jensen finally said, “we had a falling out, a… family
disagreement, it was an explosion of irritation that got out of hand.”
“He came off quite bad,” Tom opened a file listing the damage to the older man,
“facial bruising, finger marks on his neck, a couple of cracked bones, a broken
nose…”, he didn’t list everything… just left it hanging, “that must have been some
argument when all you came away with was bruised knuckles?” Uncomfortably
Jensen dropped his hands to his lap, “A lot of passion. Just what exactly was the
argument about?”
“He didn’t like me marrying his brother,” Jensen offered carefully, his promise to Mac
at the front of his mind every second.
“And for that you beat him, and wait… try to strangle him.”
“What do you want me to say? We sorted it, and I didn’t shoot him.”
Tom collected together the papers, pulling out photos of the unconscious Jeff, of the
crime scene, the blood from under him, and turned them to face Jensen, who looked
everywhere except directly at them.
“Lets start at the beginning shall we?”
”I want my lawyer,” Jensen spat out, he needed Josh here to stop this, he couldn’t
have Jared, so Josh would have to be the one to stop him from losing it. Tom sat
back, a look of satisfaction washing his face, it never took long for money to lawyer
up. He stood, about to ask Jensen for details, when Patterson entered the room,
indicating Tom should step outside. Jensen watched carefully but he couldn’t make
out what they were saying.
It was mere minutes, Welling coming back in, and gesturing to the open door, “you
will need to appear here at a later stage for the assault, but for the moment you are
free to go,” he said simply, Jensen scrambling to stand, disbelief on his face. He
followed Tom, passing other rooms, his eyes widening to see Gerald sitting at a
table, looking out at him, nodding almost imperceptibly and then lowering his gaze, in
a state of confusion Jensen just followed Tom to the booking area, seeing Jared
standing waiting and falling into his strong hold.
”What is going on here detective?” That was Josh’s voice, his lawyer voice,
demanding answers.
“Someone has just turned themselves in for the shooting and murder of Jeff
Padalecki.” Tom said softly, “Mr Ackles-Padalecki is free to go for the time being.”
“Murder?” Jared sounded shell-shocked, gripping tight to Jensen’s jacket.
Tom turned to Jared, he had to be told, but it was never news he liked to tell, “I’m
sorry for your loss sir, but your brother died just over an hour ago.”
“Who turned themselves in?” Josh pressed even as Jared felt his stomach churn and
his heart twist, his brother… dead…
“I’m afraid not at liberty to say,” was all Tom replied, nodding to Josh and retracing
his footsteps to the secure area, leaving three men in various states of disbelief, Josh
questioning, Jensen confused and Jared in the beginnings of shock.
“Gerald is here.” Jensen said, pulling back from Jared… “Gerald is in one of the
rooms.” Jared looked blank, scared, confused, couldn’t even form words… his
brother dead… his dad here… Gerald here…
“Jared? Jared?” Jensen’s voice seemed a long way away, distant, tired, concerned,
and it was all Jared could do to clutch at him, he needed JD, he may know what is
happening. “Jared… JD is here… Jared?”
Jared turned to his friend, his father, the one person who could sort this out, could
help him, level him, maybe keep him sane. It wasn’t grief he was feeling, it couldn’t
be, he hated his brother, for what he had done to Mac, to Jensen, to his mom…
“Your dad is here because he has admitted he shot Jeff, he has the gun… Jared can
you hear me? Jared?”
“I’ve got you,” Jensen’s voice, his hands holding him upright, “we need to get him out
of here, get some air…
“I’m staying for Gerald,” JD replied carefully, “take care of him.”
“Jared... come on man… let’s get you out of here… get our heads clear… Jared…”
Jared felt arms holding him, Jensen, Josh, but his head was full of noise, panic,
confusion, questions… and he allowed himself to be led out to the warming morning
air, the thick of it hard against his air con cold skin. The morning had changed, the
noise of the city around him as he was led to the back of the station, where there was
shelter and peace.
He shook his head, trying to clear it, blinking and leaning against Jensen, “Josh, I
need to see Gerald, I need to know what is going on.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Against his better judgement Welling gave Jared five minutes with his father,
standing watching, his head still not entirely behind this whole Gerald Padalecki
admission of guilt.
Jared couldn’t speak, didn’t even know where to start, glancing up at the detective
who was leaning against the doorframe just watching them. “Chris was a good choice
Jared, I am proud of you…” Gerald started, “he’ll be good for TexOil, better than Jeff
would have been.”
“Is that why you killed him? Tell me… because I don’t understand this.” Jared was
suddenly insistent; he only had five minutes with his dad, he needed to know…
“Yes,” Gerald said simply, and Jared slumped back in the chair, disappointment
running through his veins like ice. “You can never understand Jared, I don’t expect
you too.”
“You killed your son.” Jared shouted, watching for emotion, for a sign that Gerald felt
anything, but there was nothing, only silence.
“Jared, I want you to know that I am happy for you and your husband. I need you to
talk to your momma, tell her Kristen is safe now, tell her she can come home, that
they can bring my grandchildren home.” Gerald offered finally, as the Tom cleared
his throat and indicated time was up and Jared needed to leave. Jared just stared at
the man he had called father, his head swimming, with grief, confusion and hatred.
He said nothing, turning his back on Gerald and leaving.
There was nothing to say.
Chapter 21
Jared knew he wasn’t doing very well. Every time he thought about everything that
had happened it was like there a surge in his heart rate, he would find himself
sweating, edgy, jumpy, feeling constantly on guard. It was driving him mad and he
discovered the best way to deal with it was to avoid thinking at all. Every time
someone asked him a question or alluded to the events of the last few days it was
easy to just switch off, to steer clear of places or people that reminded him of the
family he was part of. He realised this was wrong, he wasn’t stupid, but he was losing
interest in everything, feeling more and more distant from Jensen, and sometime
when he looked back over what happened it was like he could almost erase some
parts of what had happened, and he knew he was developing far from healthy coping
strategies. Added to that he wasn’t sleeping, was irritable and couldn’t concentrate
and he decided the only way to not entirely destroy what was left of his life was to
stay away from everyone. JD asked questions, Jensen asked questions, Donna just
hugged every time she saw him, Kristen had visited and Jared had held her as she
wept. Megan took to following him around, her hazel eyes inevitably full of tears, her
face permanently tear stained and pale.
Mac couldn’t look him in the eyes, and he knew why, he had let everyone down, not
seen what was in front of his eyes, if only he had been vigilant then Jeff may never
have gone that far, never hurt Mac. His mom had visited, told him to pull himself
together, that he needed to be strong for everyone, he thought she probably
assumed she was helping, handing over the mantle of man of the family to him, but
she wasn’t. He couldn’t say although he wanted to scream at her, tell her he wasn’t
the right person to be looking after everyone else.
And then there was Jensen. He loved him, but he knew he didn’t deserve to be loved
back, not when his brother had wronged the Ackles family so very badly. He
wondered how Jensen could even look at him. Jensen said it, all the time he would
touch Jared with concern and half smiles and whispered promises of love, and it was
all Jared could do not to run in the opposite direction. To think they had almost
renewed vows, well that was laughable, there was no way he was going to force
Jensen to tie himself to Jared for any longer than the prescribed year, in fact Jared
had researched the whole contract scenario. The contract could be easily made null,
a divorce would be simple enough, and Jensen could then find someone who wasn’t
so damn broken and pathetic, someone who didn’t have the name Padalecki carved
into their soul.
He needed air, needed space and after snapping at something Jensen had said and
having to look at pity filled green eyes he saddled up one of the ranch hands horses,
the movements familiar and soothing. The smells of the old barn served as a
reminder of what he could have had and he hurried the task until he was finally stood
outside in the Texas heat, his eyes fixed on the horizon, on the need to test those far
off limits, to escape.
“You wanna wait Jay? I’ll join you?” Jensen’s voice was careful but Jared could hear
the questions in it. He didn’t reply inserting a foot in a stirrup and swinging his frame
on to the horse’s back, stilling the shift in the horse’s movement with a firm pull on
the reigns.
“If it’s all the same to you I’m best off alone,” Jared offered simply, seeing Jensen
sigh.
“Jared you can't keep doing this.”
“Doing what?”
“Running. You need to get this all out so we can deal.”
Words hovered on Jared’s tongue, was Jensen not seeing that now was the time to
back off? That Jared didn’t need touchy feely crap, and that what Jensen needed
was to just fucking run away from Jared and the remainder of the Padalecki family as
soon as he could. He didn’t say what he wanted to say… my brother was a rapist,
he’s been murdered by the man I called father for 27 years, I’m organising my
brother’s funeral, dealing with dad on remand, I don’t have time to talk instead he
applied light pressure to the mare’s sides and guided her out of the barn area and
past the paddocks pointed away from the ranch house and into the oblivion of his
own confused thoughts. He said nothing.
Jensen stood and watched, sighing, his heart twisting at the pain that must be inside.
“He’s not doing so well, is he?” Megan’s voice made Jensen turn. She had been here
almost solidly since the news of Jeff’s death, couldn’t face the Padalecki mausoleum
it seemed, and he pulled her into a close hug.
“No Meg, he’s dying inside and he wont talk to me.”
Megan couldn’t help the tears in her eyes or the mind numbing pain in her head and
she just burrowed into Jensen’s reassuring strength for support. She needed to tell
Jared what she had done, it didn’t matter what she had promised JD and her dad,
Jared was her brother and he deserved to know. How could she tell him? How could
she even begin to explain what had happened. But… if she didn’t… if she left it, with
Jared thinking Gerald had killed Jeff for nothing more than the family name and for
money… then she was scared there would be nothing left of the brother she loved,
the brother who had seemed to finally be getting a life he could enjoy.
She waited at the barn until evening pulled in, wishing she could just get this over
with, standing from her cross legged position when Jared finally jumped down from
the saddle. He hadn’t seen her in the half gloom and his face was open, grief carved
into it, his shoulders hunched, and she knew he was at the edge of a cliff. Would
talking to him, telling him what she had done, be enough to push him over or be
enough to pull him back? She needed him, he needed Jensen, and she knew what
she had to do.
“Why are you shutting Jensen out?” she asked, Jared jumped, startled at the
question and he whirled to face his sister.
“Jeez Meg, you scared the shit outta me.”
“Jay, tell me why you wont talk to Jensen.”
He paused, uncertainty crossing his face, “has he said something?”
“No. Jared you know he wouldn’t do that, it’s stuff I see, you avoid him, wont touch
him, walk away when people start talking… tell me Jay.”
”You wouldn’t understand,” Jared began, “Mom expects so much from me now, I
have a lot to process is all.” Jared knew he sounded ultra defensive, but it was true,
his head couldn’t handle anymore least of all cosy meaningful chats with his fake
husband.
“I’m scared Jared, and I need to tell you something, something that may…” Megan
stopped… may what exactly? May drive her brother to hate her, disown her, hit her…
she stepped back away from him and he looked confused for a moment, he wasn’t
Jeff, she knew he wouldn’t hurt her, she kept telling herself that even as the words
tumbled from her mouth. “It was me that shot Jeff.”
Jared blinked, “what?” was all he could say, disbelief in his tone, his eyes widening in
shock.
“I don’t know how it happened… there was just so much hate in me… and I just…”
her voice broke on a silent sob, “Jared, I shot him.” Jared said nothing, dropping the
reigns of the mare and taking a step towards his sister, his hands wide in front of him,
begging for her to take it back in body language that was screaming denial.
“Meg?” he couldn’t form words, couldn’t think of what to say. “But Gerald…” admitted
it had been him…
Megan raised her eyes, reaching out a hand, almost touching Jared’s but not quite,
“I thought you were different, not like them…” Jared’s voice was broken, half
believing what she said and half demanding it not be true.
She shook her head wordlessly, how could she make him understand what she had
done, when she couldn’t understand it herself. Reaching out he grabbed her upper
arms, shaking her, switching from fear to temper, “you were supposed to be
different… Megan, what have you done?” She started to sob in his hold even as his
fingers dug into her arms.
“Jared, you’re hurting me, let me go, please.” It was the please that pushed through
the fog of fear and startled at his own strength he released her, causing her to
stumble and fall back against the fence, her face breaking into tears.
“Christ Jared, what the fuck?” Jensen was there, reaching for Meg pulling her away
from the fence, his eyes wide in shock, not believing that his husband had pushed
Megan, causing her to look so destroyed. Jared stared back blankly, he had done
that, hurt his sister, and he started to back away, like he could run from the man that
was inside him, the man with the black heart who just wanted to hurt and punish,
Gerald’s heart, Jeff’s heart, it was all there, inside of him, just waiting to lash out.
“Ask her…” he managed to push out on a breath, but Megan couldn’t speak, leaning
on Jensen and sobbing. Detached Jared watched, the ice in him starting to crack...he
wasn’t like them… anymore than she was… so what could make his beautiful sister
turn a gun on her brother and pull the trigger? What was so bad that she could kill for
it? Suddenly it was like an unknown force was pushing him back to her, pulling at
Jensen’s hands until she stood alone, vulnerable, “Meggie… what did he do… did he
touch you?” abuse you?
Jensen looked at Megan’s eyes, at the fear in them, the total shock, and her
wordless gasp of horror, his own brain connecting the dots, looking back at Jared,
fuck, what was he missing here? “He didn’t Jared… he didn’t… not physically… apart
from my… my baby.” Jared staggered back, his hand at his chest, a baby, Megan
had a baby, and it was like he didn’t know her at all. That point there was make or
break, that last piece of information that sealed the decisions made next. He turned
and walked away.
Jensen made a split second decision, releasing Megan, and striding after Jared,
catching him and turning him round in a pull of muscle. “Don’t you dare,” he said
abruptly, spitting the words fast and hard, “you go back there and you talk to her…
she is your freakin’ sister for god’s sake.” Jared was shaking his head.
“I can’t hear anymore about him and what he did…” he replied trying to pull his arm
from Jensen’s grasp.
“You don’t get to decide when to stop listening Jay, he’s obviously hurt her, listen to
what she has to say. It will be OK.”
“Shit Jensen, when will it ever be ok to hear your sister tell you she shot your
brother?” Jensen crowded his husband back against the barn wall, unheeding of who
may be witnessing this, only desperate to push through the pain and chaos in Jared’s
head.
“Listen to me Jay…” he twisted his hands in Jared’s long hair, made him look down
at him, captured his gaze with eyes spitting fire, “…you go back, you listen to her,
you be a good brother, and when you have finished you come find me and we will
deal with this. OK? Together.” Jared nodded, his eyes suddenly filled with tears, “I
mean it,” Jensen continued firmly, “…you find me and I will take care of you, this has
gone on long enough.” Jensen released his hold, Jared leaning himself against the
barn and watching as Jensen stood back and headed for the house, not looking back
at Jared, trusting him to do what needed doing.
Pulling himself together, gathering every ounce of reserve he had left he started back
to where he had left Megan. She hadn’t moved, but her head was down and she was
crying silently. Carefully he closed in and pulled her into a hug, startling her to look
up, fear in her eyes. Fear that he had helped to put there, fear of what her brother
was going to say. “Tell me Meg,” was all he said.
So she did.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++=
Jensen waited, sat quietly on the side of the bed, his eyes focused on the two dark
suits hanging on the back of the door, the black ties, the crisp white shirts, ready for
the funeral then next day, trying to stay calm, trying to be the strong one. The phone
wouldn’t stop ringing, newspapers, reporters, society pages, they all wanted the
Padalecki story, yesterday they even had people driving on to the D to get photos,
turning back only when met with a rifle toting Donna in full on momma bear mode. It
was front-page news, father kills son, the fall of TexOil to Kane Petroleum, all blown
up out of truth, statements, demands, and the guilt layering up on Jared was visible.
Every time the phone rang, or a paper landed on the doorstep it was like Jared was
taking a step back. Jensen had heard him last night, tossing and turning in his sleep,
what little sleep he was having, disturbed by dreams and nightmares.
Idly he crossed to the suits pulling at the ties and curling them round his hands, the
feel of the expensive silk soft against his work roughened skin. Jared wouldn’t talk to
him, wouldn’t share any of it, closing himself down more and more as each hour
passed. It wasn’t right for him to share it with Jensen, it was up to him to sort this out,
it wasn’t Jensen’s family… on and on he threw this at Jensen, and to be honest
Jensen was starting to get a little pissed.
He looked up as Jared came into the room, his skin pale, and his eyes wide and
shocky.
“Is she ok?” Jensen asked softly, startling Jared out of his thoughts.
Jared nodded and crossed to sit next to Jensen, “thank you for making me go back.”
“Are you going to tell me what she said?” Jensen asked carefully, sighing when Jared
just closed his eyes and shook his head.
“I can’t,” he started, opening his mouth to continue then shutting it just as fast.
Jensen stood, trying to damp down the fury that was inside him at what Jared’s
family had done to his lover, closing him off, making him unable to deal with his
emotions. It was dangerous. Fucking dangerous.
“Do you trust me Jared?” Jensen asked softly, unwrapping the ties and leaning back
on the door to their room, carefully sliding the lock shut. Jared wasn’t even aware, it
was like he wasn’t even in the room his head bowed, and Jensen crossed to him,
lifting his lover’s chin with his hands, and staring into hazel eyes. “Do you trust me?”
he asked again and saw Jared nod. “Lay back and shut your eyes.” Jared looked
confused making to stand, his face creased into a frown but Jensen just lay a firm
hand on his shoulder, “I’m not asking Jared, I’m telling.” They stood this way for long
minutes, until Jared scooted up the bed and laid down, closing his eyes as he had
been told to do, assuming Jensen was going to give him a massage, work the knots
from his neck that had curled into a bitch of a headache. Thing is, Jared knew,
nothing Jensen could do to him would touch the surface of what was in his gut, in his
heart, the guilt, the hate, the self loathing…
Carefully Jensen slipped away Jared’s T-shirt and jeans, cutting off his protests with
a harsh shhhh, and leaving no room for argument, until Jared lay clad only in boxers
on the bed. Carefully he grasped Jared’s hands lifting them above Jared’s head,
wondering if he should trust Jared to leave them there.
”Are you gonna move ‘em?” he asked Texas long and insistent. Jared’s eyes
opened… this wasn’t a massage, this sounded like the prelude to sex.
”Shit Jen, I don’t wanna-” Jensen stopped the words with a hand over Jared’s mouth
deciding that no, Jared was unlikely to keep still, and in deft movements he slipped a
knot around Jared’s hands, the silk ties soft against his skin, and looped the new end
over the middle bed newel, Jared unable to move his hands all the time Jensen
straddled him. It took Jared’s brain a few seconds to catch up on this, finally bucking
up trying to dislodge his husband, fucking furious with him that he would even think
Jared was up for freaking sex at this very moment.
“Lay still.” Jensen ordered softly, just using his own body weight to try and hold Jared
still, until at last he did that, just laid still, suddenly very aware that Jensen was
leading this, and not knowing what to expect. He wasn’t new to being tied, had got
into some kinky shit with this yoga teacher a few years back, but this was different,
this wasn’t playing, and having Jensen there, telling him what to do, even as
confused as he was Jared was half hard in his boxers and that just felt wrong, like he
was being violated somehow.
”Jensen?” the name was a question, a plea.
“Tell me… did Jeff touch Megan?” it was kind of a huge question to lead off with and
Jared squirmed under him, but Jensen held strong and just leaned forward kiss biting
a trail of touches from eyes to nipple, drawing the hard nub into his mouth and biting
softly, hearing the mewl of pleasure pain in the man strung out under him. He lifted
his head, “…did he Jay? Did he abuse her, was it his baby?”
“No,” Jared’s horrified reply was spat out suddenly, “no…” his head had lifted but he
laid back down, “he hit her, pushed her, she lost her baby… he had her boyfriend
framed and killed in prison.”
”Why Jared. Why did he do that?”
“He said the boy wasn’t good enough for her…”
”Is that what you think? That the boy wasn’t good enough for her?”
”I didn’t… I…” his voice tailed off as Jensen moved to the other nipple, pulling on it,
worrying it with his teeth, and unbidden Jared moved his groin up seeking resistance,
hardening without even realising it. “I didn’t even know him,” he breathed carefully.
”If you did, what would you have done? Would you have helped Jeff?” Jared’s eyes
widened, is that what Jensen thought?
”No… Jesus… no.”
”What about Mac?”
”Mac?” Jared asked helplessly as Jensen moved lower, sucking marks of possession
into skin stretched taut over hipbones.
“Mac is beautiful, do you want some of that? Did you? Would you have fucked her
like Jeff did.” Jared’s eyes widened, he didn’t have a spotless record but every
partner he had had was a willing partner, mostly older, he wouldn’t have… couldn’t
have…
“No… no… fuck Jensen…” he felt Jensen’s mouth on his inner thigh, and he was
thrusting into air desperate for his husband’s clever mouth to be there, whining as
lips touched the folds at the base of his dick, gently laving at his balls, just this side of
pleasure pain as Jensen drew one then the other into his hot wet mouth, I don’t want
this… don’t make me… please Jensen…
Jensen lifted his head, looking direct into hazel eyes blown with need, with want,
seeing the confusion there, “you ever hit your momma Jay? You mom with her sad
lonely life and her ghost like existence, you ever want to slap her to get her to live?
Maybe push her around?”
“NO,” Jared was near shouting his denial, “I haven’t ever… I wouldn’t…”
Jensen’s lips touched the crown of his dick, licking gently at the evidence of his
arousal, gentle very gentle, his hand moving up to twist hard on a nipple, the balance
of gentle and hard so perfect, so right, and Jared could feel a sob in his throat, he
didn’t want this…
“Are you a bad person Jay? Have you ever had your hands around someone’s throat
willing them to die? Like I did with Jeff? Closing the fingers tight, waiting for the
fragile pulse to just stop under your hands?”
“No, Jensen, it wasn’t you… it was Jeff…” Jared’s voice subsided into mindless
babble as Jensen closed his mouth around Jared’s dick and seemed to swallow him
whole in seconds, bottoming out against the back of Jensen’s throat, his tongue
moving, sucking Jared like…
It went on and on, Jared so close, tears in his eyes, at the battle inside him, he had
left Meg with Mac, should be there with her… should be seeing Gerald… should be
supporting his momma… Kristen… should be burying his brother… but Jensen didn’t
let up, taking him so close, pulling off, leaving his hand jacking Jared slowly, moving
up to have his mouth a breath away from Jared’s, he could see Jared so close…
knew the signs… “You are not your brother Jared…you shouldn’t be carrying his
guilt.” He twisted his hand, that clever twist that he knew would finish Jared, and
within seconds his broken husband was coming hot and wet across his hand, harsh
sobs torn from his chest. Jensen didn’t hesitate, pulling at the ties that held Jared
still, leaning into his strong body, just holding him as he cried, listening to the words
that tumbled from his lips.
“how could he do all that… he deserved to die… how can I say that… how can he
leave me to deal with it all… what do I do?”
“I didn’t see Meggie, I didn’t see what had happened… I didn’t see what Jeff was
doing to her… I didn’t stop what happened to Mac… I didn’t stop him hitting mom."
Why didn’t I see all this?
Chapter 22
When Jared woke it was to dawn creeping in through open curtains and to a
headache that wrapped around his head like a steel band. He rolled onto his side,
groaning with the pain in his eyes that only crying could leave and buried his face
deep into soft cotton, flushing red with the embarrassment of what had happened the
night before. Jensen was warm and strong against him, deep in sleep, his breathing
a rhythm to count heartbeats by and Jared tried to inch away, he wasn’t sure he was
up to talking after what had been pulled from him in the dark.
”Where ya goin'?” Jensen’s voice was slurred with sleep, his arms reaching up above
his head to touch the wall, exposing his chest to view, pale skin and tracks of freckles
just there to see and to touch. Jared suddenly forgot he needed to run, completely
forgot he had cried like a freaking baby for hours the night before and totally forgot
the headache that had forced him awake. Turning back to face Jensen, not knowing
what to say, not knowing how to say thank you, he did all he knew how to do. He
pressed his hands on Jensen’s holding them above his head leaning in to rest his
head against Jensen’s pulse and his bed warm skin. Who could resist touching a
naked Ackles-Padalecki in their bed?
Not Jared for sure.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac poured more chocolate into Megan’s mug, after what Meg had just told her, and
given Mac wasn’t drinking alcohol, chocolate seemed like second best. They sat
silent for a good ten minutes.
“What did Jared say when you told him?” Mac finally asked, watching as Megan
hunched over her mug and took in deep breaths of the fragrant liquid inside. She
didn’t ask again, just waited as Megan quietly sat and contemplated.
”He walked away…” she started, lifting her head quickly at Mac’s indrawn breath,
“no… not like that… he came back… Jensen made him come back… I know he
didn’t mean to walk away, he is just overwhelmed and he was… I guess he was in
denial.”
“So he came back…”
“And we talked, and I told him everything… even when I wasn’t sure I should tell
him.”
”Why wouldn’t you tell him? Why have you never told him what Jeff did to you?”
“Why did you not tell Jensen or Josh about the baby?” Megan said simply, almost as
if that was answer enough.
“That was different,” Mac defended quickly.
”When you told Jensen and Josh they wanted to kill, they had it in their blood, that
urge to protect you, kill for you. I knew Jared would do that, that it would destroy our
family… I wasn’t brave enough to do that. I wanted peace, I wanted to forget. I
needed to grieve.” The girls sat in silence, Chad walking out in boxers and a T-shirt,
his hair mussed from sleep his eyes worried, looking for Mac, seeing her and Megan
talking and simply turning back to Mac’s room with a simple nod of understanding.
Megan looked at Mac’s soft smile. “You love each other very much,” she said almost
wistfully.
“Yes, Chad is…” Mac didn’t know how to explain, how to put into words what her and
Chad were, “…the other half of me,” she finished, half wincing at the cliché but
knowing Megan understood. “He loves our daughter, and that is such a big thing for
me, for us, to be the three of us.”
“Can I ask you a question, more like a favor maybe?” Mac could tell Megan was
nervous and she frowned, wondering what Megan was going to ask that was so bad.
She nodded OK. “I don’t know whether… what happened… to…” Megan lowered her
head, her voice cracking, as grief and a sever lack of sleep washed over her, Mac
reached out a hand and clasped Meg’s tightly. “Could you help me find out where my
son is buried? Jeff said he had sorted things… and also Ben… could we find where
Ben is buried so I can say goodbye?”
“Of course we can Meg…” Mac’s eyes were damp and bright with tears, “of course
we can.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jared felt like a voyeur, watching his sister and Mac from the doorway, neither
knowing he was there. He couldn’t hear what they were saying, heard mention of the
name Ben, and wondered if Meg was telling her sister-in-law the whole story he had
been told yesterday. He felt strength inside him, thanked Jensen for what he had
done, how he had snapped Jared out of the downward spiral of denial and distress,
made him see what was happening to his baby sister.
“Hey,” he finally said, pushing away from the door and crossing to pour himself
coffee, both looked up at him, Mac with a smile, Megan looking uncertain, worried.
She didn’t know what to say to Jared, almost as if the ball was in his court, that it was
his turn to reassure her that everything was going to be OK.
Jared found it hard to start; he wanted to just say everything that was inside his
heart, sorry, and thank you, and everything will work out. He wanted to talk to her
about what they should do next, knew he needed to talk to his dad, wanted Megan to
know he would keep her secrets, that he loved her. He tried, he really did, opening
his mouth to at least say one thing, just… one… damn… thing… but nothing was
happening and the atmosphere was turning cold, icy, Mac confused and angry,
Megan unsure and Jared simply unable to talk.
Megan stood, shakily holding onto the back of the chair, “thank you for the
chocolate,” she half whispered, just wanting to escape from the kitchen, far away
from the disappointment in her brother, of the extremes she had reached that he now
knew about. She didn’t get far as he hooked her with one hand and gripped her tight
into a hug, tucking her head under his chin, his hands gripping behind her, her arms
around her, holding her.
“Good morning Missy Meg,” he said gently, using the nickname he had given her as
a young child, “did you manage to sleep some?” She couldn’t answer, just stood
soaking up her brother’s strength, feeling the warmth of him, gripping onto him as
tight as she could, and nodding. She had actually managed to sleep for a short while,
curled on the sofa in the main room, her head full to bursting with the decisions she
had made in her short life and where they had left her today.
”Did you?” she finally asked back, feeling the chuckle that started in his chest and
sounded around her, the vibrations against her cheek.
“Jensen made sure of it,” he said, then added the proviso that he thought she should
hear, “didn’t stop me worrying about you then.” It was the concern of a brother that
was the last straw, and hot tears started to track from her eyes, burning into Jared’s
skin.
“I’m sorry… sorry…” she whimpered softly, unable to stop the flow of tears.
All Jared did was pull her tighter, rocking her gently, supporting her grief, “I love you
Meggie… shhhh…. everything will be ok now, I’ve got you… it will be alright…”
They stood for a long while, Jared carding his hand through her hair, just being
strong for her, tears in his own eyes, like they needed to cry together to wash away
the hate and the misery. He felt stronger just having her there in his arms, stronger
with Jensen looking out for him. Just stronger.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The helicopter whirled overhead and finally sat hovered in one position, the noise of it
a distant reminder of the paparazzi that stalked them all on a daily basis. The group
huddled around the open grave were silent, stoic, Jared between his mom and
Megan, arms around both of them, each lost in thought. He listened as the minister
intoned the eulogy, the words familiar and reassuring. Chad stood with Mac, Jensen
and Donna to one side, JD off to one side, his features carefully blank of anything,
his head a million miles away.
He had known what to say when he had arrived at the D earlier that morning, knew
Jared needed to know the whole truth. He owed it to his son and to the woman he
wanted to call daughter. He sat them down, shuffled paperwork, legal documents,
letters of intent, medical records, and he knew exactly where to start.
”Your dad is dying,” he began, realising he needed to qualify that statement, “Gerald
is dying. He has maybe two more months, is refusing treatment for a particularly
virulent strain of lung cancer that has pulled him from healthy to dying in the space of
weeks.” Jared looked up quickly, was that why Gerald had organised the whole
TexOil presidency thing – just to tidy his house before he died? JD knew what
Jared’s question would be. “No, I didn’t know before the night that Megan revealed
what she had done and then, only when I called your father, called Gerald, and he
categorically told me what the doctors had said.”
“Is that why…” Megan wanted to ask… is that why he has taken the blame for the
murder? Only because he knew he could never really be tried for it? Had he turned
down the treatment for his cancer because of a need to die?
“The treatments open to him would prolong his life for maybe an extra few weeks,”
JD hurried to say, knowing immediately what Meg was thinking, “he has signed a
DNR, the authorities that have him are aware and know that there will be no trial.
They have a signed confession and that is enough for them. I think Welling would like
to dig further, that means we can never say anything for fear of further investigation,
but yes, in the main, this is the end of it for all of us.”
JD stood at the funeral, remembering their conversation, his eyes on Megan, who
leaned into Jared for strength, willing her not to lose it and blurt something out, as
she looked over at her dad, dressed in a suit and cuffed to guards either side of him.
He had been allowed out on special leave, bail had been refused in light of his
admission of guilt and he had been bound over for sentencing, and now he was here
at Jeff’s funeral, a broken man, old before his time, but still, somehow in choosing the
time of his own death, the master of his own fate.
JD watched as Megan and Jared approached Gerald. Megan in tears, Jared white
faced but calm.
Jared nodded, “Dad,” he said simply.
“Son,” Gerald replied, nodding in return, leaning into the hug that Megan was giving
him and then being pulled back by the guards.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It was three weeks to the day that Jared and Megan buried Gerald Padalecki, his
name to be inscribed next to Jeff’s name.
There was only one thing Jared could say, and it was important, he pulled Jensen to
one side. “Promise me, when I die, don’t put me there with them.”
Jensen just held him close, promising him he wouldn’t, “Nah het-boy, you’ll be with
me.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac rolled onto her back, her head and neck propped up by pillows, her daughter
practising gymnastics in her belly and Chad snoring softly at her side. She had
woken up from a graphic dream, her daughter telling her goodbye, Megan sobbing
softly as she stood at her son’s grave, so much pain that it forced her awake to face
the midnight hours on her own. She could get up, wonder out to the kitchen, see if
anyone was awake, Jensen maybe, Jared, Megan… or she could lay here and look
at the ceiling for a few hours until she was too tired for her body to remain awake any
longer.
It was Chad that made her decision easy, his sleepy voice asking if she was OK, did
she need anything? Ever since she had passed the seventh month mark, her skin
stretched tight across her belly and her back arched to support the weight, he had
worried and fretted and followed her around like a man intent on not missing one
thing. She smiled in the dark, her hand finding his and lacing her fingers tightly.
“You,” she finally whispered into the night that invited secrets and shared desire, “I
need you.” Chad leaned up on one side, focusing on her in the dark, his beautiful
fragile strong sad happy Mac, and he traced a line of small kisses on her long
graceful neck and up to her lips. He couldn’t get enough of her, of the taste of her,
touching her, her and the child inside her. They were to be married in two weeks, that
was Chad’s idea, he wanted to be married before their daughter appeared, Mac had
tried to argue… what if something happened… what if she died… then…
That had been one of their only arguments and it had been harsh and hard. Chad
had ended it swiftly, if you died Mac would I leave our daughter, is that what you think
of me? She had the grace to blush, yes, it was what she had thought; that it was Mac
Chad wanted, that he couldn’t truly want the daughter that had been created in anger
and hate. He made her see she was wrong.
“I love you,” he whispered against her skin, moving to kiss her belly, laughing softly
as he felt the kick inside, and slipping her tight grip he used his fingers to touch each
freckle that marked the trail to her centre, “three days is too long,” he added softly, I
want my ring on your finger now,” she arched into his touch as warmth began to pool
and spread out through her body, and her breath hitched at his words. He had the
power to push her over the edge with just the softest touches and she curled into his
arms letting him take control, letting herself relax into him.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
In their room Jared was equally as restless but for different reasons, not least of
which was the fact that Jensen currently had him pinned to the bed with his lips
wrapped tight around his dick and his hands getting creative in matching rhythm.
“Jen…” He couldn’t voice his needs any more coherently that just random words of
begging, despite being at the back of the ranch and away from everyone, he was
trying to keep it quiet and it was so damn difficult. He wanted to demand more,
harder, there, more, harder… and Jensen damn well knew it, teasing him, pushing
him to the edge and then retreating, until Jared was a writhing mess of want… He
arched up pushing harder, Jensen moving back, the fucking tease, actually taking his
mouth off, chuckling low in his throat at the sight of his husband laid out so needy
and begging under him.
”What d’you want Jay?” he shifted himself, scooted up the bed encouraging Jared to
move with him until they lay side by side, heads on soft pillows, legs twisted together,
Jensen hard against his lover, finding a rhythm his hand closing around Jared and
finishing him off with no more than a few twists and pulls of his clever fingers. He
didn’t give Jared time to say a word, or even to breathe, he wanted to come when he
was kissing Jared, wanted to lose it as he tongue fucked his husband’s mouth, his
need for touch and taste overwhelming. He didn’t know what was pushing this, even
as he felt Jared come, arching hard and stiff against him, hot and wet between them,
he wanted to taste and rut and feel. He heard Jared’s breathing in his ear, harsh,
quick, and words of love and thanks, and he lost it, coming so damn hard he saw
stars. Jared reached for the towel he had been wearing after his shower, wiping them
and pulling Jensen back close to cuddle. He had felt a difference in his husband,
wanted to know what was wrong, why Jensen couldn’t look at him and was buried in
his neck his breathing ragged.
“I know something is on your mind, talk to me,” Jared demanded softly. Jensen
groaned inwardly, he was so going to come out of this sounding like some huge girl.
“We didn’t renew our vows,” Jensen finally said. Great, he’d said it now, it was out
there, and yes, he did sound like a girl, all kind of hurt and worried. Jared for his part
was silent, Jensen lifted his head, expecting to see Jared’s wide grin, see
reassurance in hazel eyes. Instead he saw a face twisted in a frown and his eyes
closed. “Jared?” he asked, this really wasn’t going how he expected it to go. Jared
slid out from his grasp moving to sit on the side of the bed, his hands buried in his
long hair, twisting and pulling and then slumping in defeat with a huge sigh. “Jared?”
“We don’t have too you know,” Jared finally said, his shoulders stiffening as Jensen
embraced him from behind, knowing his husband’s touch was going to make resolve
difficult.
”What do you mean?” Jensen asked softly, even though he knew damn well what
Jared meant.
“You can change your mind, you know, we can leave it at the year.” Jared finally
offered… there, he had said what had been like acid inside him for days.
”I knew that what was in your head Jay, and I say again, I love you, I want this to go
past a year, two years, ten years, twenty.” Jared looked up, a hopeful light in his
eyes, he needed this reassurance, craved it… “So we could do this tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? What about…” planning… family…
“Us. That is all we need, the family, and words we mean… maybe out by the
paddock with the rest of Texas laid out in front of us, at dusk…” Jensen sounded so
wistful, and it was all Jared could do not to smile a sappy smile in return to his
husband’s words. He didn’t need to say anything else, Jared could see he wanted
this, could see the remainder of his life spread out in front of him with Jensen in his
life.
“Tomorrow then,” Jared finally said, “tomorrow…”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Chapter 23
Kristen arrived early, looking bright and calm and for the first time in a long time
seemed sober. Both kids immediately jumped at their Uncle Jared, and it was with
ease that he swung the two small wriggling bodies up and over his shoulders,
commencing running like a mad thing around the yard, scruffing up soil and dust and
whooping as loud as the children.
Jensen just looked at him, a sappy smile on his face, this was good… this open
affection that Jared could find for his niece and nephew. Kristen shifted awkwardly
from foot to foot, not quite looking Jensen in the eyes and Jensen felt just as strange.
The only times that they had really met they were hardly civil to each other, both
burnt from inside with their own particular brands of jealousy.
“I wanted to talk to you if I can.” Kristen said softly, so low Jensen almost didn’t hear
the quietly spoken words. He raised an eyebrow and just nodded, go on. “I don’t
know how to ask this, not after everything my husband did to us and to you, but I’m
not well, I mean…” she sighed and Jensen turned to face her fully, not well? “…I’m
an alcoholic Jensen, you know that, and finally I can face that, I don’t need it, I don’t
want it, but I cant do it on my own. There’s a place I can go…”
“We can help… Jared will help any way he can.” Jensen offered simply, knowing the
man tangling with the children on the floor would do anything for the woman who was
his brother’s wife.
“The favour I have to ask… I know you are just starting on your married life…” she
paused again, and ducked her head, long hair swinging to hide her face, “…but I
wanted to ask you, not Jared so he accepted out of obligation, but you. Would you
have the children for a while, I mean not for long, and I could see if I could find
someone else who-”
“Yes.” Jensen said simply, suddenly, reaching out to lay a hand on Kristen’s
shoulder, firm, “we would love to have the children.” Kristen looked pathetically
grateful for the instant kindness and it made Jensen’s heart twist that she was this
scared to ask for help.
“What’s wrong?” Jared said carefully, seeing Jensen with his hand on Kristen’s
shoulder and Kristen looking close to tears.
“Nothing Jay, I just volunteered for us to have the rug rats for a while so their momma
can have a rest.” Jared looked into his husband’s clear eyes and then to Kristen’s
and back again. He sensed there was more to this than could be talked about in front
of the kids and so didn’t say a word other than to add his five cents to the
conversation.
“Cool.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Mac and Megan sat side by side in front of the mirror, Megan desperately trying to
tame her long hair, Mac trying to cover the bags under her eyes with concealer, both
chatting and laughing and discovering things about their respective brothers that they
knew would make awesome blackmail material at future family parties. It was natural,
it was real, and it was a friendship that went way past family. Simply put, it was two
women together, at ease, as they discussed being little sisters, being pregnant, being
scared and being happy. Chad did try to sit with them. He lasted ten seconds,
blanched at the word tampon, and left the room, in his words, to find some men.
Mac shifted in her chair, the smile slipping from her face momentarily as her back
twinged horribly, sending sharp pain up and down her spine and into her legs. To add
insult to injury her daughter decided to join in kicking her hard and pushing herself,
as if to say… down here… I’m down here…
“You OK Mac?” Megan asked frowning at her friend’s obvious discomfort, seeing the
pain on Mac’s face. The pain in Mac’s back had started as they stood at the grave
that marked the place Jeff had arranged to bury her son. Even as Meg stood and
cried tears of goodbye, tracing the small headstone in the children’s graveyard, she
knew just by how Mac was standing that it was all too much for her. That had been
yesterday, and Meg was seriously concerned as to how Mac was going to make it
through their brother’s vow renewal ceremony.
“Yeah,” Mac finally said, “I phoned the doctor, she wants me in tomorrow, says it is
probably just the baby turning.” Mac smiled softly, resting a hand on her swollen
belly, “only four more weeks,” she added, “and I get to meet her.”
Meg placed a hand over Macs, squeezing gently, “I cant wait,” she said simply, and
Mac looked into her friend’s expressive eyes, knowing that her daughters aunt was
going to play a huge part in the baby’s life. Feeling suddenly and overwhelmingly
sentimental, she leaned as much as she could, ignoring the twinges in her back, to
pull Megan in for a hug, which Megan returned with a similar affection. They pulled
back, both blinking tears, and turning back to the mirror and resuming their beauty
ritual.
The knock on the door was met with catcalls from them both to remind whoever was
at the door that no men were allowed in, and ended with them falling into giggles
against each other.
”It’s me, I wonder if I could speak to Megan?” it was JD’s smooth voice, and with a
shrug Meg rose to open the door, letting JD into the room.
“Hey Uncle J,” she said simply, pulling him in for a hug and then leaning back to look
up into his eyes, seeing something in them that scared her.
“Meg, I found Ben for you,” he said simply, and Mac looked at him sharply, hearing
something in his voice, watching as Megan slumped defeated to the chair, both of
them knowing the day they stood at Ben’s grave was drawing closer, the end of it all.
Maybe Meg could find some peace, some closure; still it didn’t make it any easier to
hear bad news.
“Where?” Meg said simply, wondering if he was buried at or near the prison he had
been murdered in, wondering if she had it in her to visit the grave of the one man she
had ever truly loved.
“San Antonio.” Jeff offered gently. Meg nodded carefully, he had been incarcerated in
the prison on the outskirts of San Antonio, it made sense he would be buried there
she guessed.
“Thank you Jeff.”
“Meg…” Jeff’s voice changed, became deeper, his voice choked with sudden
emotion. “… he’s still alive. Jeff lied, he didn’t die, he was bullied, threatened by Jeff
… but he didn’t die… he’s at the UT campus in San Antonio, alone as far as I could
see.”
Ben. Ben was alive?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sherry accepted the coffee from Donna, sitting herself at the scarred kitchen table,
her head spinning and her eyes wet from tears. Donna didn’t know what to say, felt
she should maybe say something, anything.
”Thank you Donna, for taking in Jared and Megan,” Sherry finally said, “… they
needed a home, and the D is a better home than they had ever had with me.”
Donna sighed, sudden steel in her voice, “I don’t want to hear that Sherry. You aren’t
a mouse, a small person who is going to let life steamroller her and then just thank
people for giving your kids a better life than you did. That is bull shit.” Sherry’s eyes
widened, as Donna continued. “You can play the fading southern rose card all you
want, but know this Sherry Padalecki, you survived… you had things piled on you
that no normal person could have endured, and out of all of that, Jared and Megan
are kids you can be proud of.”
“But - ”
“No buts Sherry, drink your coffee, swallow the southern genteel crap, and get some
backbone, we’ve got candles to arrange.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
JD hovered at the kitchen door listening to Donna giving Sherry the sound advice
Sherry needed to hear. He wondered if he could love Sherry any more than he did
when he was younger. Wondered if he would ever tell her.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Josh and Anna arrived with their kids about an hour before it was all due to kick off,
Anna smiling, the kids running to join there cousins by marriage with joint calls of
don’t get your clothes dirty ringing in their ears. Josh then proceeded to track down
his brother, whilst Anna helped in the kitchen; she hugged Meg with her good news
about Ben, and asked the one question Mac had been unable to ask.
“Will you go and see him?”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dusk was starting to draw the evening in, the entire ranch lit with the glow of the
setting sun in hues of red and gold. Donna and Sherry had gone all out with the
candles, creating a flickering backdrop to Jared and Jensen who stood by the
paddock, with the people in their life they loved standing around them.
It was Jared who had said he wanted to speak first, the words he had in his head
from the first time they were to renew their vows very different to the one he was
going to say now.
“Despite how this started and the wrongs I tried to do,” he began softly, “I want you to
know that over the past few months, ever since you came to the TexOil tower to see
me, my heart hasn’t really belonged to me anymore. We fought and I resisted, we
loved and I resisted, but you didn’t let me stay away, you opened your heart, your
life, offered your family to me, and I finally accepted.” He swallowed carefully, seeing
the dusk colours reflected in Jensen’s eyes and seeing them suspiciously bright. “I
promise you that you will never regret the gift you gave me. I swear it Jensen.” He
reached for Jensen’s hands, clasping them tight. “On our wedding day, I pledged
many things to you, said words that made little sense to me at the time… but today,
the first day of the rest of our lives, here in front of our family and friend I want to
make sure you know how much I love you.”
Sighing deeply, hesitating only momentarily he continued, “I Jared Tristan AcklesPadalecki love you Jensen Ross Ackles-Padalecki and I want you to remain my
husband, my partner in life and my one love that will always be true. I will hold our
union in my heart and promise to love you more each day than I did the day before.
I read something somewhere, and your eyes, your beautiful changeable green eyes,
they made me remember… someone once wrote this and I hope I can remember this
rightly… the world, for me, and all the world can hold, is circled in your arms, for me
there lies within the lights and shadows of your eyes, the only beauty that is never
old. I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you
faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the seemingly incredible
obstacles life puts in front of us. We will face it together. Jensen, I love you, and I
give you my hand, my heart, and my love. Forever.”
Jared was lost in the words, meaning every syllable, aware of little more than the
pressure of Jensen’s hands in his, of the smile that was on Jensen’s face, of each
freckle he could see on his skin.
It was Jensen’s turn to respond, and he drew every ounce of emotion from his heart.
“When we said we would renew our vows, I had this whole speech prepared, but
today I find myself just asking these two questions. How do I explain how I love my
husband and how has our love changed since we exchanged our wedding vows?
And I have a simple answer. I didn’t love you when we exchanged our vows, I
couldn’t have, I’m sorry I lied to my momma, but that is the truth here and now. I
didn’t know you as anything other than the son of our family’s nemesis, just a name
that is all you were to me. So today I stand here, with new promises, learning from
every single thing that has happened over the last few months, from crisis to crisis
my love has grown. My new promise, and yet maybe not so new; is that I love you,
and I will continue to hold you in my heart and my mind and love you for as many
more years as God allows.”
I, Jensen Ross Ackles-Padalecki, take you, Jared Tristan Ackles-Padalecki, as my
partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know to be just as
amazing. I am so damn excited to have the chance to grow together, getting to know
the man you will become, and falling in love with you a little more every day. Know
this het-boy, I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may bring us.
The good, the not so good, the joy and the sorrow. I want to laugh with you, cry with
you, smile with you, and I promise to be understanding, and to trust in us completely.
Together I know we will be strong enough to face everything life throws at us.
I don’t have the poetry in me to give to you Jared, but I have the love for my family,
my land, for my horses, and I want to share every single part of it with the man I call
husband.
I love you Jared.
There wasn’t a dry eye, as they moved to embrace, kissing away any doubts they
had had before they exchanged these new vows, to the applause and catcalls from
their family. It was a moment not one person present would ever forget.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The party was in full swing, Padaleckis and Ackles laughing and reminiscing and
crying and just forging simple bonds that would last many generations. It was odd
really that no one noticed Mac was missing, after all she had been the centre of
attention for so long that for no one to see she wasn’t in the tangled mess of noise
and confusion would be something that would haunt them all for the rest of their
days.
It was finally Chad who noticed first, suddenly aware that the drink Mac had gone for
had taken at least ten minutes, and concerned he went to find her. Only growing
more concerned when he couldn’t find her in the kitchen, or in the best room. Maybe
she had gone to lay down, maybe she was in the bedroom. Meg caught his arm as
he passed by, “is Mac OK?” she asked at the look on his face.
“Think she is laying down, imma gonna go check on her.”
So he did.
Megan was half listening for it, anguish in her as she heard Chad shout, heard him
scream for her and Jensen…
When they slid to a stop in the hall, Chad was there, holding Mac in her arms, she
looked so pale, so lost, eyes closed, skin grey, and blood… blood everywhere. Chad
lifted eyes filled with horror and disbelief, to Jensen, to Josh, to Donna…
“Help us…” was all he could say.
Chapter 24
Author's Notes:
Thank you... just... thank you all... and... Happy Christmas... HUGS XXXX
Two weeks later
Jensen continued the rocking, Elizabeth asleep in his arms, her tiny rosebud mouth
slightly parted, her hands in fists as she slept the sleep of the innocent. There was
nothing to mark her from the drama of the caesarean, no blood that stained her, she
was just beautiful, a miniature Mackenzie, eyes still the blue of a newborn but hair
thick and dark and in curls around her face. She moved her lips in that all familiar
sucking motion, half opening her eyes and then closing the lids again, sleep
outweighing food. She had been born at a good weight for a prem, five pounds of
mewling squealing need that Jensen cradled in his large hands as if she was the
most precious thing he had ever held. Chad had named her Elizabeth Anne, the
former for Gramma Ackles that had long since departed this world, and Anne for his
mother. No one argued, it was a beautiful name and Chad deserved to have his
family in his daughter’s name. She wanted Elizabeth all along, he had said as he
cried tears of pride over his tiny daughter, and Jared had just hugged his friend close
as Jensen picked the baby from the bassinet and cooed over her delicate features.
“You are so loved,” he whispered down at his niece, humming the words to a lullaby
tune and continuing with the rhythmic rocking and singing as he protected her from
the world. She tensed in her sleep, pulling her legs up to her stomach and he lifted
her gently, rubbing her back and resting her head on his neck, against his pulse, his
chin resting on her soft curls, the baby smell so sweet and soft. He kept singing, low
and soft, the rumbling in his chest soothing her to relax as he massaged her back
and finally she stilled again, so much so, he had to listen hard to make sure she was
breathing. She was dressed in pink, everything was pink, from her baby-grows to tiny
hair bows, to her bottles, to the teddy’s that sat outside of her crib, in fact Jensen
thought he had never been surrounded by so much pink outside of Mac’s room when
she was little. He remembered holding Mac as he did Elizabeth, being trusted by his
mom and dad to hold his new sister, and at five feeling like he was the most
important person in the world. It felt the same way still.
Jared had just left, to get coffee he said, but really Jensen knew he wanted to find
Chad, worried about him, wanted to make sure he was OK. The suddenness of what
had happened the day they renewed their vows… it had shocked everyone to the
very core, and he knew Chad was being hit the hardest, blaming himself for not
noticing Mac was ill, that things were going wrong. Everyone had said they too
should have noticed, but Chad had excuses for them all, leaving only himself as the
one person that should have been there for Mac at the moment it counted. Jared had
been Jensen’s rock, silently supportive, silently loving him, organising, helping,
signing forms, handing over money like there was no tomorrow, buying in the best at
the drop of a hat, willing it to be enough.
It had been the longest two weeks of Jensen’s life, the only single point of light,
curled into his arms at this moment. They had christened her… just in case… but
Elizabeth Anne Murray was a fighter, and from her sudden arrival in this strange new
world it seemed she was determined to live. Other than slight jaundice she was well,
healthy, a good weight, with an exceptional set of lungs when the stubbornness of an
Ackles broke through. Jensen looked up at the clock; it had been an hour since Jared
had left. He wondered if he had found Chad yet, wondered even as the door opened
gently and Jared let himself into the room, closing the door behind him and leaning
back against it. He was crying. Had tears in his eyes, and Jensen felt grief twist
inside him, imagined his husband was going to tell him that Mac had finally died,
despite fighting for so long.
“Jen… she’s awake.” Jared’s voice was broken, a smile pushing through the tears,
and Jensen looked down at Elizabeth, unable to speak, fat tears collecting in his
eyes and choking his voice. He tightened his grip on Elizabeth, feeling her murmur
and snuffle against his skin.
“Let’s go see momma,” he finally said, drawing a breath, trying to stop the tears,
stumbling to stand with his niece in his hold, Jared there, supporting him, pulling him
into a quick hug then leading him to the door. They exited the mother’s room onto the
long white corridor, and to the left where Mac’s room was, where she had been since
she had fallen into a coma when her baby was born. The room was quiet, Chad
leaning over Mac, hearing the door and leaning back, a grin on his face, revealing
Mac, so pale but so peaceful. Gently Jensen handed Elizabeth to Mac, watching as
Chad helped her to hold her daughter, and shushed her as she began to cry looking
down on what she had created.
Mac looked up at Jensen, to Chad, and then back down to her daughter. “Elizabeth,”
she said softly, “hello little one.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Meg was uncertain. Nervous, anxious, and anything else that could describe just how
she was feeling. Jeff had visited Ben, threatened him with accusations of rape if he
came near their family again, handed him a cheque for ten thousand dollars, all this
Megan knew from JD and his private investigator and the uncashed cheque in Jeff’s
private filing. No stone had been left unturned in finding what had happened, and she
knew in her heart that Ben hadn’t left her, hadn’t forgotten her because of anything
she had done. It wasn’t because she was too young, or because she had lost their
son, or even that she was a Padalecki, it was just because of her brother and the
way he had wanted to control her life. She had wanted to see him, only waited until
Mac was back home and it had been five weeks since she had found out he was still
alive, five long weeks when her mind spun with scenarios. From running into each
other’s arms pledging undying love, to being turned away in hate, every single
possible outcome of seeing Ben had been mapped in her head with startling clarity.
She sat in her car, a rental, as unobtrusive as she could get, Mac’s words ringing in
her ears, just say hello, what is the worst that can happen? Meg knew what the worst
thing could be. Maybe he would wouldn’t recognise her, maybe he hated her, maybe
he was in a relationship that was so secret even the PI couldn’t see it, maybe he
would just run for his life in the opposite direction from the disease that was
Padalecki. What sane man would want her? Her brother dead, her father dead,
herself a murderer with the weight of guilt heavy on her heart, scandal and gossip
twisted around her and Jared as easy as vines on a tree, one stupid rumour, one
wrong picture and the whole world could see her for what she had become. Empty, a
socialite with nothing more than money to make her happy, sad, lonely, a shell of her
former self.
Self-pity welled up inside her, and she thought of Jared. So happy with Jensen, so in
love, normal, natural love, no recriminations or deals, only the truth between them.
She knew she had to tell Ben everything. That is, if she got past the initial hello’s
alive. He had to know that the man that had rolled the dice and decided on their love,
was dead at her hands, and maybe, just maybe, he could understand how it had
come to that. Jared had simply wished her luck, stubbornly annoyed that Megan
wanted to do this alone, looking to Jensen for back up. Jensen who just held tight to
Jared’s hand and told his husband to back off, told him that it would be OK, that it
was Megan’s demons that needed to be challenged and she had to face them
standing alone and strong. Megan silently thanked her brother in law, even as Jared
grumped and muttered, finally pulling Megan into hug that made her want to stay
there forever and never see Ben again.
And now. Now she sat in the car unable to move, knowing Ben was maybe fifty feet
away, twenty minutes away from the end of his shift at the students coffee bar just on
the edge of the campus. He was studying veterinary science, had always had a way
with animals, and had worn the tie of office administrator with unease and despair
that he would never get to do what he wanted. Ironically it had been Jeff’s actions to
getting him arrested, that had meant Ben had been funded through the youth
rehabilitation programme to get into UT. Onto the very course he had originally
wanted way back when he told Meg of his dreams and aspirations. So maybe Jeff
had done one thing right, god, Meg could hear him turning in his grave as that
thought crossed her mind.
Finally she climbed out of the car, brushing imaginary dirt from her shirt, and running
her fingers through her hair, knowing she couldn’t prolong this any longer, and
starting to walk towards the door marked with the coffee mug. Suddenly she stopped.
The worst scenario ever flicking through her thoughts unbidden. Ben would surely
have known Jeff was dead, god, half of America knew about Jeff being dead, but
where had he been, why hadn’t he come and found her? Students knocked in to her,
and she spoke her apologies at standing in their way, ignoring the stares, wondering
if they even thought who was standing here on the campus waiting for her dreams to
be shattered. She couldn’t do it. She didn’t have the strength to do this.
Someone thrust a flyer into her hand, sudden and noisy, and she looked down, two
for one on lattes, free hazelnut and cream, two for one… two for one… Drawing a
deep breath and stiffening her spine she made the last few steps, pushing open the
door and stepping into the cool inside, students milling about her, waving their
vouchers, the level of noise too much for her to think, until she saw him, and the
noise fell away. He was laughing, talking, taking money, and making coffee, just Ben.
Ben a little older, ten years older, taller, wider, confident, short brown hair, eyes the
colour of burnt caramel, she knew him… she would always know him. She moved
closer, the silence still in her head, wondering what to say, and then he looked up,
blinking, looking past students, vouchers, coffee, and noise, looking right at her. His
sun-browned skin seemed to pale, his eyes widened, and he simply stared, like his
eyes had nowhere else to focus. Without conscious thought he dropped the mug he
had been holding to the counter and wiped damp hands on a towel, moving quickly
around the bar until he stood toe to toe with her. This was it. This was the moment
Megan had seen in her head and she knew he would want her… or not…
Gently he raised his hands, hovering next to her skin, before capturing her face in his
hold, his eyelids half closed, his mouth speaking words she needed to focus on.
Bringing her hands up to rest on his arms, she tried to make sense of what he was
saying, until she could hear him, as clear as day, just one name, over and over and
over… Megan, Meggie, Meg… She half smiled, did he want her? Did that mean he
needed her? She felt his kiss, soft, gentle, wondering and leaned up to press her lips
back. This felt right.
Dropping his hands he grasped her hand puling her through the people, shouting
something back to the others behind the counter, thrusting open the door and almost
falling out into the Texas heat. She stumble tripped after him, a sudden lightness in
her heart as he pulled her into his arms for a kiss so deep, so passionate, she melted
into his embrace.
This was a scenario she never dared to run in her head.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sherry was pacing, and despite both Jared and JD trying to calm her down she kept
walking from kitchen to hall and back. Finally she stopped as the realtor reached the
bottom of the stairs, shaking hands with the couple that stood with him, and waving
them off to their car.
“And?” Sherry said simply.
“Seems like murder pays,” the realtor smirked, stepping back at the look of irritation
in the son’s eyes, looking back at the mother, the owner of this white palace in the
middle of nowhere. “They want you to drop two mill, then it’s a deal.”
“Done,” Sherry said without hesitation, leaning into JD as he held her carefully. Jared
nodded at the decision, they didn’t need the money, and they just wanted this symbol
of what the Padalecki’s had stood for gone from their lives. JD smiled inwardly, loving
the feel of Sherry in his arms, tightening his grip and feeling her relax into his firm
hold.
“I’ll stay with your mother,” JD offered simply, he knew Sherry had said she had
some items to sort out at the house, knew Jared was eager to get back to talk to
Megan after her trip to UT and to Ben.
They watched the realtor leave, watched Jared leave with a final hug for his mom,
and then they stood in the hall of the place that held so many bad memories. Sherry
turned in JD’s arms, wanting so much, but not sure she could ask. JD sensed her
hesitation, sensed that she was holding back.
“What’s wrong?” He asked gently, knowing that she could reply anything, from
worrying about Meg, to thinking of Jared, to remembering Jeff, to losing her husband.
What she finally said rocked him, when very carefully she touched his cheek, her
eyes strong and clear and determined, “Can you help me forget.”
It was a decision that was very easy to make, and he pulled her into his arms, the
kiss between them as hot as the days he remembered from before. Maybe, just
maybe, their son would have his parents together again.
JD could only pray.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The day of the wedding was Texas hot and clear, the ceremony itself full of tears and
laughter and the cry of a newborn lacking attention. Mac looked beautiful, stunning, a
princess, in ivory and lace, Chad ridiculously handsome in his dark suit, and the
minister who guided the service was like a proud papa as he joined the two young
people in marriage. Sherry and JD held hands, a fact which didn’t get missed by
anyone, and Josh and Anna chose that day to announce Anna was pregnant again,
that another Ackles was to join the world in five months time. Meg stood with Ben, a
diamond solitaire on her finger, the weight of her secrets shared with her fiancé, who
had simply turned to her and accepted everything she had done with the purity of
love. They were to be married at Christmas, three short months away, and Megan
had a whole new world to explore as one who was loved unconditionally by someone
outside of family. They had brought a small apartment off of the UT campus and she
had moved in nearly straight away, much to Jared’s disgust as he had grown used to
having her around at the D. She had enrolled for the new year in an advanced Math
programme, which caused everyone to roll about laughing, only stopping when she
recited the 27 times table off the top of her head and explained Fermats last theorem
to her open-mouthed audience.
Jared watched the wedding with pride. Pride at his best friend holding his sister-inlaws hand, pride in his husband as he stood smiling at Mac and Chad, so obviously
in big brother I did that mode, it made Jared laugh. They danced and partied until the
early hours of the next day, Mac half resting and half dancing, until finally everyone
started to drift away to various rooms in the D, the beautiful old ranch house lit with a
thousand white fairy lights.
Jensen leaned back against the fence, looking at the house, imagining each person
in each room, then turning to face the paddocks, empty of horses, but fresh with the
promise of a new day. He felt partway sad, partway happy and he allowed the events
of the last few months to drift through his head, from the contract to the vows, from
Mac, to Jeff, to Gerald, to his own momma who stood tall and happy as she saw her
only daughter wed to the man she loved. It was heaven to stand here, with Texas
stretching way into the distance and his land beneath his feet, and when Jared came
up behind him, wrapping his long arms around Jensen in a tight hold; it was a heaven
that was complete.
“Hey Mr Ackles... you OK?” Jared said softly, leaning to leave a small kiss on
Jensen’s neck.
Jensen turned in Jared’s arms, raising his own hands to twist in long chestnut hair.
“That’s Ackles-Padalecki to you, het-boy,” Jensen returned with his customary smirk,
“and yeah, I’m good.”
"I love you Jen."
"I love you Jay."
"Let's go to bed, yeah?"
THE END