1. family and parenting
2. children

Fathers, Train Your Sons
Passage: Ephesians 6:4
FAITH COMMUNITY BIBLE CHURCH
2015
Authored by: Jason Wolin
So today we are moving into Ephesians chapter 6 and we are going to mix up the order of the
text this morning for reasons that will become immediately obvious in just a moment. We
have been moving through this section in the book of Ephesians that talks about what it looks
like to very practically be filled with the Spirit. Some commentators talk about this section of
the book of Ephesians as the household code. This is where Paul gives instructions about how
a Spirit-filled person will act in the common household relationship that we all experience.
We’ve talked about wives to husbands and how God wants women, starting from a position of
strength to voluntarily surrender their position of power as an act of love. And we’ve talked
about the relationship of husbands to wives and how they are to take that power that was
handed over to them and use it, not for the benefit of self, but to love their wives as Christ
loved the church and gave himself up.
And now in Ephesians chapter 6 we are addressing two other common household relationships,
children to parents and fathers to children.
Now Paul first address children and second addresses fathers but we are going to switch it
around. We are going to spend this week and next week addressing father’s and then on July
28th we will address the children. And of course, would you not agree, that it would be very
strange to teach a message directed at children to obey their parents when none of the
children are here because they are all in Sunday school? I agree. So on July 28th we are going
to keep all the children 1-5th grade in the main service. And we will have an interactive service
where we try and teach the main points of this passage and parents can listen along.
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
So that’s the plan. Now this message to father’s is going to be broken in two parts. Today will
be a message to father’s about raising boys. Next week will be a special father’s day message
about raising girls both of them coming out of our text.
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So open your Bible’s to Ephesians chapter 6 and we will read the first 4 verses.
Ephesians 6:1-4, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father
and mother" (this is the first commandment with a promise), "that it may go well with you and
that you may live long in the land." Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring
them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
The Recipient
In English, every command can be thought of as having three parts. There is person who is
issuing the command, there is the person receiving the command and then there is the
command itself. Verse 4 is a command coming from God himself and interestingly, it is directed
only to Fathers. This is a change from the context.
Notice the text says, “Children, obey your PARENTS in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your
FATHER AND MOTHER…
And then very specifically he calls upon not parents, no father and mother; just father. Fathers,
bring your children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Now listen, dads, what that is saying is that God holds you RESPONSIBLE for the raising of your
children. There is a responsibility here that rest squarely on the shoulders of FATHERS. That
doesn’t mean that moms are not critically and integrally involved but it does mean that
ultimate RESPONSIBILITY lies on the father.
Think about this idea of responsibility. Responsibility implies that you have been given a certain
amount of governance, a certain amount of ownership, a certain amount of oversight over this
valuable resource and there is an EXPECTATION of wise stewardship. Irresponsibility then
would be heedlessness or carelessness. So for example, let’s say you are 18 and you have the
next four years ahead of you set aside for college. 4 years is a lot of time. College is expensive.
And grandpa and grandma set aside 50,000 for you to go through college without you having to
work. But you put in minimum effort and failed. That would be so irresponsible.
Time and money are incredibly valuable resources. You were in control. And you wasted it. So
responsibility entails expectation.
Responsibility always is referred to in the context where our decisions impact others. We talk
about driving irresponsibly hunting irresponsibly, preparing food irresponsibily; the difference is
that your poor decisions affect others.
Well, God has given you children; they are not your children. They are his children. And he is
going to hold one person primarily responsible (not for how they turn out for that is his
responsibility) but for the environment in which they were raised. Let’s just state it clearly.
There is a responsible way to raise children and an irresponsible way, a way that wastes the
opportunity and wastes the resource.
Children are so impressionable. They are the future. Our children will become the next
generation of presidents, politicians, engineers, pastors, teachers, elders. And the quality of
the next generation depends on us. We can WASTE THAT OPPORTUNITY!!!
Fathers, Train Your Sons | 2/25/2015
Another thing responsibility implies is that this resource is not really yours. It’s a community
resource that you have been entrusted to manage. Your irresponsibility affects others. In the
college example, you wasted other people’s money, and your careless living impacts others. It
soils your parents reputation. You could have been such resource for society. Instead you are a
drain.
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When Hitler came to power one of the first things he did was seize the education system. He
did not want to waste the opportunity to program the minds of an entire generation. And he
did. And when he reached the Zenith of his power there was not a single general left who was
not bred under his educational system.
Kids are such an incredibly valuable resource. If trained well, they turn into powerhouses. If
ignored they turn into menaces. Think of a baby sapling. When it is young you can bend it
easily. Shape it easily. But when it is old it becomes hardened and set. You cannot bend a 100
year oak tree into a new shape. It’s shape is now its own.
Can you not feel this in your own life? When did you learn your values? What shaped what you
care about? Sure little tweaks here and there are still possible, but honestly they are more
confirming what you already believe rather than changing your beliefs? Who was the most
formative in your beliefs? Or maybe that’s not the right question. Maybe you had bad parents
who set bad examples and ignored you. Who do you most strongly blame for not helping you
form your beliefs? Is it not largely your parents?
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
God is calling on fathers to recognize this impressionable moment in life, this raw potential, this
resource that needs cultivating and managing and to own it. To seize it. To not neglect the
constant pruning and shaping and cultivating needed to raise a son. Father’s do not
underestimate your influence in your son’s life. Perhaps you never had a father growing up.
You say to yourself, “I turned out fine.” It can’t be that important. But talk to anyone who was
raised without a father. Every one of them feels like they got robbed from some important
influence. Mom was great. Mom did such a good job. I know she loved me. But I needed a
dad.
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I’m 38 years old. I remember being a kid and looking at a 38 year old and thinking, well, there’s
an adult. I suppose, I’m supposed to be an adult now. You want to know the one thing that
makes me feel like a kid instantly. It’s thinking about my dad. My dad will always be my dad. I
still have this crazy drive to please my father. Nothing brings me more joy than to hear my dad
say, “Good job.” Nothing motivates me more strongly than to hear my dad say, “Jason, I’m so
proud of you.” I drink in those words. I feel like I’m 8 years old craving for the approval of my
father.
Dad’s you have so much influence on your children and you always will. The text says, Father’s
bring your children up….There is a Greek word that is like our word for “toddler.” But the word
used here has more the idea of offspring. I am a 38 year old son of my father. And he still
wields incredible influence over me and always will. It doesn’t ever end. You don’t stop being
dad and ever get to stop caring. Fatherhood doesn’t stop. Maybe your kids are out of the
house. You’re not done being dad. How much does it mean if your dad takes an active roll in
your grown life? I can tell you that it means the world to them.
It’s so easy to downplay your roll as a father. As an excuse we say to ourselves, “There’s not
much worth emulating here.” And true or not, it doesn’t matter. That is where they are
looking. They still want your approval. They still want your smile. They still need your
direction and correction. Men, it’s time to step up; look this responsibility straight in the face.
Man up to it and embrace what God has for you. You’re a father either way; what kind of
father will you be?
We talked about the wives responsibility to submit and respect their husbands. That surely
resonates with men. We have this deep desire to be respected by our wives. But then when it
comes to the responsibility of raising children all of the sudden they say, “Why are you looking
at me?” You can’t have it both ways. You don’t get the glory of a purple heart by dodging the
draft. If you want respect, then be respectable. It is easy and natural for a woman to respect
and submit to a man who is leading his family well.
Stop hiding under the phrase, “I’m being a good father; I’m providing for my family.” That’s like
saying, “I’m a good Doctor, I didn’t kill the patient.” Providing for food, drink and shelter is kind
of the bare minimum.
Look at the command here. It’s so much deeper than that.
The Command
The command can be broken into two parts.
Now in keeping in line with the pattern that Paul has already established there is clearly a put
off/put on principle going on. He’s saying, “Put off provoking your child to anger” but instead
“bring them up in the discipline and admonition of the Lord.
It’s easy for parents to read this verse and be consumed with guilt; and for sure guilt in some
cases would be an appropriate response. But be careful to not lump all angry behavior of your
children into this category. When you take the Tonka truck away from your two year old and
he screams at you in anger, that kind of anger is not what the verse is talking about.
This verse is talking about a much more specific category of provoking behavior. The text says,
“Do not PROVOKE your children to wrath.”
Think about that word provoke. When I think of provoking something the picture that comes to
mind is that of taking a sharp stick and poking a sleeping bear. I mean, the bear wants to sleep.
You poke it once. It will ignore you. You poke it again, it will ignore you, even forgive the
Fathers, Train Your Sons | 2/25/2015
We will spend the majority of the time on the put on; what we should do. But it’s worth just
spending a moment talking about what Paul is telling us to Put off - specifically what does Paul
mean when he tells us to not provoke our children to anger.
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interruption. But the more you poke it, sooner or later it’s going to get super annoyed.
Eventually his anger is going to flare up against you.
Kids are kind of like sleeping bears. I am just constantly amazed out how forgiving my children
are. They are some of the most gracious human beings on the planet. And I know that is by
God’s pure gracious design. We are learning how to be parents. Nobody gets to enter into
parenting experienced. We learn on our kids the same way we learn in everything – by making
mistakes. I have blown it as a parent ten thousand times and when your kids are young they
forgive you. You say you are sorry and they fling their arms around your neck and two seconds
later they want to play snakes and ladders with you. Their propensity is to forgive. Their
nature is to not be angry with you. It almost takes a concerted effort to make them angry.
But you can make them angry, with enough provoking, it can flare up. The anger we see in this
passage is the anger of self-defense. The same thing you would do if a bee was flying at your
face, “you would swat it away.” They sense that you are out to hurt them.
God gave us the ability to detect threats so we could protect ourselves. Now if you tell your
boy to get off the couch and come help you mow the grass and he gets angry at you, well that is
not what we are talking about. His pride is injured. He’s saying, “I want to do what I want; I
don’t want to take orders. That is just sin. What we are talking about is something more along
the lines of bitter resentment. If your child is angry at you in that sense, they have concluded
that you are out to hurt them, not help them. They have concluded that you are not just
struggling with vanilla selfishness, but that you are trying hurt them. That is a sad place to get
as a parent. It may not be the case, but if they are feeling resentment, then this is certainly
what they have concluded. That is a sad conclusion for your own son or daughter to draw
concerning your motives.
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
Paul is saying, “Don’t do things that would cause your child to come to those conclusions.
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How do we drive our kids to embitterment?
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Maybe it’s through broken promises.
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You break a promise once; that’s a bummer.
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You break a promise twice; things happen.
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You break a promise three times? Okay you are being straight up selfish.
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You keep breaking promises long enough, and they become angry and embittered.
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You are just toying with me. You have no intention of helping me. You are trying to
hurt me. You like hurting me. And they become angry.
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Maybe its through constant criticism without any encouragement.
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Again, at first they see the truth in it. And they try to please you but it’s not enough.
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So they try harder and it’s just more criticism.
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And pretty soon they conclude that nothing is ever good enough. They conclude you
are “Impossible to please” Your always grumpy. Your just a crate of crankcase oil.
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You are just trying to hurt me. You just enjoy the feeling of putting me down. That
actually makes you feel good. And they become angry. Perhaps you have felt this seething
exasperation – nothing I do is good enough for you!
This by the way, is exactly the idea we get when we read the parallel exhortation is Colossians
3:21, “Fathers do not provoke your children, lest they become… [here rather than saying angry,
he says] discouraged.
I’m going to stop even trying. I am going to start treating you like a non-entity. Some kids don’t
get angry very easily. Instead they withdraw. It’s the same problem just a different response.
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Maybe it’s through neglect.
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At first you are busy.
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You are dealing with problems. They get that.
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You are tired. They get that.
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And your child pleads his case. Listen, it’s really important that I spend some time with
you. And it’s neglected and neglected and neglected. And again, the conclusion comes in, you
are trying to hurt me.
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You know I need you. You know I want to spend time with you. And you push me off.
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How could you not know how I feel? How could you not feel how deeply that hurts?
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I think you know exactly how badly this hurts me and you like it. And they become
angry.
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Unfair accusations.
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You come to some snap judgment without learning all the facts.
Fathers, Train Your Sons | 2/25/2015
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But sooner or later they add up to what they really are. Excuses. The excuses keep
rolling off.
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You bark without actually listening.
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You hold past failure against them and don’t let them change.
But here’s the deal. In all these examples, it’s not so much what you do that’s the problem. It’s
what you don’t do. Your kids are not detecting love. 1 Peter 4:8; Proverbs 10:12 both say,
“Love covers a multitude of sins.” That’s why we don’t want to take too much time talking
about what we should be putting off as parents, yes, for certain, this needs to be put off, but
what should we be doing as parents – what should we be putting on? If you love your kids, if
you care, if you lovingly correct, if you lovingly try to bring God’s wisdom to bear on their lives,
if you try, if you put forth effort, if you confess, if you discipline with tears, your kids will most
likely see that, and they won’t conclude that you are out to hurt them, and if they see that, they
won’t be embittered against you.
Well clearly this is not what we want to do. We don’t want to PROVOKE our children to anger.
We don’t want to prod and prod and prod and prod and abuse their patience and forgiveness
and have them conclude that we are out to hurt them.
So what do we want to do?
Two obvious points emerge
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
1.
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Bring them up with Discipline (training) - Redirecting the affections to the Lord
Here’s the idea here. The word translated discipline here is the Greek word paidea. Now this is
a very rich word in Greek culture. Believe me, this word would have come with a freight of
meaning.
It’s interesting to me that so many translations, simply translate this word Discipline, because in
my mind that conjures up the idea of consequences for foolish behavior. And certainly that
would be included. But it’s way, way to narrow. That would be like calling education,
homework. Sure that’s a part, but it’s a much broader concept.
The Greek idea of paidea was the entire upbringing and cultivation of the mind, the morals, the
values of a man, the discipline necessary to promote those things, the worldview. Think of it in
terms of reverse engineering. What would be the ideal man be like? What morals would he
possess? What character might he have? What skills? What subjects of learning would he
have mastered? Okay, now reverse engineer that. What kind of influences would have to
shape him so that he would become that? This is the Greek idea of paidea.
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It included knowledge of philosophy
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It included literary development like writing, grammar
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It included physical prowess and development
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It included science, math
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It included social skills and communication skills like debate, rhetoric, etc.
From a Christian perspective, this is really the idea of worldview. How does a Christian think
about, well everything. Dad’s teach your sons to think about everything.
I love Christianity because there is nothing it doesn’t touch. God has an opinion on everything.
He cares how you eat. He cares how you work. He cares how you relax. He cares how you go
to church. He cares what you read and how you read and how you learn. Teach your kids how
to think.
You introduce them to Darwinian evolution. Challenge what they believe. Make them think
about it. Make them defend their position. Make them evaluate ideas critically. Help them be
honest with the weakness of certain points of the Christian perspective (for example the
problem of evil).
One of the things that should immediately become apparent after hearing the richness of this
word is that there are no shortcuts to this sort of thing. I like you have many modern day
heroes and ancient ones. And in every case I always walk away with the same impression.
There are no shortcuts. It’s so easy to give up and quit. Why? Because it’s a long hard race.
Fathers, it’s your responsibility to build and shape and mold your son into the man God wants
them to be. You are staring at a FUTURE man. He will one day be your exact age. You are the
one responsible for providing the paidea.
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Don’t let your boy arrive at grade school and let em go. Keep going.
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Don’t let him get to those teenage years and then he starts flaunting that attitude and
you think, “Well, it’s just a stage.” And you let him go. No! Keep going.
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Don’t let yourself think, “Well, he’s finally got his drivers license.” I guess I was able to
raise him without killing him. And you let him go. No! Keep going.
Fathers, Train Your Sons | 2/25/2015
2 Cor 10:3-6, “For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh.
For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy
strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of
God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ, being ready to punish every disobedience,
when your obedience is complete.”
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Building this man or woman is your job as a father and it takes a lot of work and you’ve got to
see it through ALL-THE-WAY-TO-THE-END!
There is a quote that I have found to be true in my life and it comes (of all places) from Ralph
Waldo Emmerson, “That which we persist in doing becomes easier, not that the nature of the
task has changed, but our ability to do has increased.”
Left to their own devices children will take the path of least resistance. I am trying to grow
cherry trees in my backyard along the fence in a horizontal direction. Well trees want to grow
vertical. And it takes an incredible amount of effort to keep those trees bent down. They are
always wanting to grow up. The heart of a child wanders. It drifts constantly. It needs
constantly hedging.
Every child wants to make excuses for behavior. When they drop a pop fly in the field a
hundred excuse will surface. The light was in my eyes. There was a bug in my ear. My glove
was hurting me. But you bend them. You teach them that authority flows to those who take
responsibility for their actions. They wont like it. At first they will resist. But you softly bend
without breaking and eventually the resistance lets up. And they are shaped.
Paidea is not easy. But it is worth it. It’s the concept of Deut 6:7
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
Deut 6:7, “You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit
in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”
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While you walk and sleep and rise. Whatever you are doing there are opportunities to teach
and instruct.
Boys need to learn to be men. And not in the corrupted wordly sense, but in the biblical sense.
Teach them to respect life. Teach them to protect. Teach them how to talk and communicate
beyond grunts and glances. Teach them hard work. Teach them manners and being
considerate.
Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13:11
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I thought as a child, I understood as a child; But when I
became a man, I put away childish things.”
That’s talking about this process. Childishness is appropriate for a child but it’s foolishness in an
adolescent and shameful in an adult. Fathers you are the one who teaches them how to
mature. You point them and direct them along the path. You help them to put away those
childish things.
2. Bring them up with Instruction – Redirecting the mind to the Lord.
This is also a very interesting word. This is the word nouthesia. You may have heard of the
term nouthetic counseling. It comes from this word. And the idea here is that there is
cautionary advice about something, especially about something that is dangerous! You see we
don’t just discipline. We don’t just tell them, don’t do that. We explain why! We explain, “This
will hurt you and here’s EXACTLY how it will hurt you. It’s in your best interest to obey! It’s in
your best interest to do what seems hard.”
Listen, here it is in summary form: Discipline without the accompanying wisdom is destructive.
Are there times when your kid just needs to learn to obey, “because I said so!” Of course. But
the general rule, the general principle that should flavor everything is that you are always
telling them why. Because discipline without wisdom is destructive.
The hardest things to teach a boy is the concept of delayed gratification. Think about it – this is
profound – a 5 year old child has lived….wait for it - 5 years. His sum total experience is 5
years. Period. He probably only remembers 3 years. That’s not very many cycles. He wants to
go down a certain path. It looks attractive! Tell him, I know where that path leads. This is
nouthesia – this is instruction.
Or even take a 16 year old. He’s really had so little experience in life. He wants to do
something. Now! He wants to date that girl. He wants to experiment with drugs and alcohol.
He wants to spread his wings. All he knows is he has this really strong feeling/desire. He hasn’t
had very much experience reigning that in. And as a parent it just seems like he indulges
himself without restraint.
Fathers, Train Your Sons | 2/25/2015
Your job as a parent is to constantly speak about the danger of certain attitudes and paths. We
need to put in a word here in defense of the sage. Our culture does not value grey haired wise
people. I’m still trying to figure out why that is. But listen, wise men, the fools of our culture
have won! How have they done it? By shutting you up. Where is the grey haired man who is
brave enough to stick his neck on the line and say, “What you are doing will lead to
destruction!” What you are doing is on the path of ruin. They may not like it. They may ignore
your advice. But everyone will remember when your words of wisdom come true. Everyone
will remember when your prophesy concerning their doom is fulfilled down to the letter. How
else is a man supposed to learn. Parents, you are to be a prophet to your children. Tell them
about where that path leads. You have been on it.
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The only difference between you and him is that you can see where that behavior leads and he
can’t. But he’s never seen any of those things first hand. He doesn’t see the path he’s on. And
so you don’t just discipline him off the path he is on, but you need to explain to him why?
Where does that path lead?
This is nouthesia – this is instruction.
Listen, it is biblical to point out the consequences of sin in other people. So often we are afraid
of “judging someone” and it is good and right to be cautious about making snap judgments
about why or how a person got where they are. And just because you use someone as on
object lesson doesn’t mean you shut off the heart toward compassion. You can still be loving.
But we need to point out the cause and effect relationship between decisions people make and
the trouble they find themselves in.
And you see this kind of instruction going on and on and on all through the proverbs. Here’s
some great parenting instruction coming right out of the Bible. Let’s think about Solomon here.
One of my favorite examples is Proverbs 7. I picture Solomon looking through the lattice of his
window and seizing the opportunity he grabs his son by the shoulder. His son is 16 years old.
His voice is cracking and he’s breaking out with achne and says, “Hey son, look at that guy. I
want you to listen to me. Look straight into my eyes. I’m deadly serious right now.
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
Pro 7:1-5, “My son, keep my words and treasure up my commandments with you; keep my
commandments and live; keep my teaching as the apple of your eye; bind them on your
fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart. Say to wisdom, "You are my sister," and call
insight your intimate friend, to keep you from the forbidden woman, from the adulteress with
her smooth words.”
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He’s warned him many time. Notice the discipline is there. She is forbidden. Your not
allowed to look at her. Now if he stopped there, he’d be frustrating and confusing him.
Discipline without wisdom is destructive.
You see, I’m sure Solomon’s son is transitioning into adolescence. Hormones are on overdrive.
He’s all of the sudden noticing women. And this particular woman is dressed in a provocative
way. And it’s drawing his attention. And Solomon has told him many times. Don’t look at her.
And he says, “Why?” Here comes the wisdom. Watch him. This guys is fool. Let me tell you
what happens if you let yourself get trapped by her eyes.
And he describes this woman coming out seizing him, kissing him, giving him everything he
wants. What’s wrong with this? This is awesome. Listen son, “Your hormones are telling you
right. You will get a rush of sudden excitement. But I’m telling you with deadly seriousness, the
end is death.”
Pro 7:21-27, “With much seductive speech she persuades him; with her smooth talk she
compels him. All at once he follows her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as a stag is caught
fast till an arrow pierces its liver; as a bird rushes into a snare; he does not know that it will cost
him his life. And now, O sons, listen to me, and be attentive to the words of my mouth. Let not
your heart turn aside to her ways; do not stray into her paths, for many a victim has she laid
low, and all her slain are a mighty throng. Her house is the way to Sheol, going down to the
chambers of death.”
Do you hear how good that is? Do you hear how he instructs? Do you hear how he appeals to
his joy? Do you hear how he tells him the reason for obedience? This is so important.
Solomon does that with the sluggard as well. We talked about the importance of teaching your
kids hard work. Maybe you set rules for how much screen time your kids get. That’s good.
Maybe you force them to help you in the yard and do some hard manual labor. And they don’t
like it. DO IT. Their whole being is screaming: Why? If you don’t tell them why you risk
embitterment.
Again, Discipline without Wisdom is Destructive.
You have to explain why? You look the in the eye you and you say, “Listen, life is hard. You
have to work hard. And if you don’t you will be trampled.
Proverbs 24:30-34, “I passed by the field of a sluggard, by the vineyard of a man lacking sense,
and behold, it was all overgrown with thorns; the ground was covered with nettles, and its
stone wall was broken down. Then I saw and considered it; I looked and received instruction. A
little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you
like a robber, and want like an armed man.”
It’s really hard to get kids to see the value of hard work. It’s really hard to get them to work
sustained periods of time. Yesterday my son Brock put in a solid 8 hours of manual labor.
That’s a credit to him and also comes on the heels of approximately 400 other times where he
put in 5 minutes and started complaining. Did half hearted jobs. Kicked dirty socks under the
bed and threw eaten corn cobs in the recycling bin because it was two steps closer than the
trash can.
Fathers, Train Your Sons | 2/25/2015
Proverbs 6:6-11, “Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. Without having
any chief, officer, or ruler, she prepares her bread in summer and gathers her food in harvest.
How long will you lie there, O sluggard? When will you arise from your sleep? A little sleep, a
little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a
robber, and want like an armed man.”
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He had a great attitude yesterday, cleaned the whole house, worked hard in the yard. And I
told him, thank you so much for your hard work. You were amazing today. Truly you ought to
be proud of yourself. But listen boy you just made a fatal mistake. “You just showed me what
you are capable of. You almost had me fooled that you couldn’t work.”
Fathers, if you do your job well, you will teach your son character. And that is a gift.
Praise is well, compliment is well, but affection – that is the last and final and most precious
reward that any man can win – mark twain.
What son cannot but help but shower his father with affection if he has done this well?
Communion
Well today is communion Sunday. And there is a good connection to what we have discussed
so far. Fathers who discipline must themselves be under discipline. If you have not learned to
be a man you must yourself become a man before you can teach your child what that looks like.
And that requires repentance. Repentance followed by learning. Learning without repentance
is another way of wimping out.
Faith Community Bible Church Sermon Notes
God is our father and we learn so much by just looking at how God treats us. Whenever I am
stumped as a parent I try to ask the question, “Well, how does God treat me when I have that
attitude.” And the answer is almost always, “With grace.”
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