1. No category

LIFE
Hitting a wall at work?
Stuck in a relationship
rut? This may be hard
to hear, but the problem
might be you. Ayana
Byrd reports on the
surprising, subconscious
ways women undermine
their own success—and
how to stop for good
D
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180 MARIE CLAIRE / MAY 2012
How to
Get Out of
Your Own
Way
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MAY 2012 / MARIE CLAIRE 181
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182 MARIE CLAIRE / MAY 2012
Clear Your Way
Think you might have a
few self-defeating habits
of your own? Figure out
your unintentional
behaviors and start
breaking through with
these easy steps:
1
Ask for an honest
assessment. Since
it’s so hard to get out
of your own entrenched
mode of thinking, ask
people you love and
trust—your mom, husband,
boyfriend, best friend—
to help you identify
problem behaviors.
2
Don’t get defensive!
It’s hard to hear
constructive criticism,
but if you do, you’ll be one
step closer to making
a positive change.
3
Live your ideal
life—for 10 minutes
a day. “In a perfect world,
you don’t have annoying
behaviors. If you picture
yourself wanting to be in
a loving relationship,
practice being a loving
person,” says author Amy
Spencer. “Do something
simple: Buy your friend
a little gift, give a good
hug, love and adore
someone to establish the
pattern of being who you
want to be.”
4
Be patient with
yourself. The brain
will fold itself around an
idea and take a long time
to straighten out, says
motivational scientist
Heidi Grant Halvorson.
“Too often, people think,
I’ve been trying something
new for a month and
things are still the same,
so I guess I can’t change.”
Plan what you’re going to
do differently in order
to make a new behavior
automatic.
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LANA CASTLE IS NOT HER REAL NAME. PREVIOUS SPREAD PHOTOGRAPH: RANKIN/TRUNKARCHIVE.COM
LIFE