Spring 2015 CHANGING LIVES Liz Jones meets two service users who have made big changes in their life - a man with a passion for caring and a woman who is proud to be a loser! David is a young man with a passion for caring. He loves his job as a junior care assistant and is studying hard for his level 3 qualification in social care. “I love it absolutely”, he says, “It’s the best thing I ever did”. So it’s hard to believe that not so very long ago he was homeless and addicte to alcohol, substance abuse and self-harm. On the streets at the age of 21 and without a clue what to do next, David found his way to the Friary – and that triggered off a whole range of events which helped him turn his life around. “I was a rough sleeper and it was really bad,” he explains. “But one day I met a friend from school and he brought me along to the Sunday night church service at Friary. If I met that friend again I would thank him so much.” But what David valued more than anything was someone to talk to about his problems – things you can’t just chat to your friends about. Being able to see the GP and getting help with his CV were also invaluable. He went on to attend Alcoholics Anonymous, did voluntary work and has been dry for three years now. Like many people in his situation, looking back is painful. “When I first came to Friary I was a dishevelled mess. It was terrible being David returned the following Monday and was homeless – I would go into a library, public fast tracked into the Salvation Army Hostel. toilets or any place just to get shelter. God Soon he got a flat through the Guinness Home knows how many relationships I destroyed Trust and Friary helped him kit it out with a through alcohol. It was such a dark place few basics. for me.” “I got some food and a cooker and some furniture – nothing huge but to me it was massive. That was such an amazing gesture.” David also describes the guilt people can feel when they do start to feel better. “When you get dry you have a guilty conscience about the continues on next page WHY SUPPORT THE FRIARY? ACT continued past so you want to give something back,” he says. He decided to look at working as a care assistant after attending a jobs fair and hearing all about the work. “I like the idea of helping people and I’m so pleased they gave me the opportunity. I love it so much I don’t even want to take annual leave. And I can’t wait to move on – maybe to nursing – that would be my dream job.” David works in a residential care home for older people and talks passionately and sensitively about the residents and their families. “It’s fantastic,” he says,” I love all the characters and I love being there for the families – helping them through difficult times. I know how to talk to people without patronising them and I love dealing with all the health professionals as well. It’s cool!” Quitting alcohol was a big turning point for David. It was a long process – about six to 12 months – but he did it because he was sick of being drunk. “I didn’t want to be a 50 year old drunk. I’ve yet to meet someone who’s a drunk yet witty and intelligent,” he says philosophically. “Coming to Friary was the first and more important step,” he says. “Being on the streets I was terrified. The weather was terrible and I had no idea what to do. Coming to Friary showed me there were practical steps to take and gave me back a bit of independence. They helped me with everything. When you are homeless you feel very worthless. You live everyday like it’s your last. Friary gives you back your self-confidence.” Lisa is less of a person than she used to be and is proud to call herself the biggest loser! That’s because she has lost three and a half stone in weight and has been crowned the Greatest Loser by Slimming World. Lisa now weighs in at 18 and a half stone and her aim is to keep on losing. Size 14 would be nice she says. “It used to be like walking around carrying two massive bags of spuds,” Lisa quips. “I had trouble walking, my legs swelled up and I was always breathless.” It was the nurse at her GP surgery who told her the only way to solve her problems was to lose weight. “She was brilliant,” says Lisa. “I really didn’t want to go to the slimming club because I was embarrassed. I was in a real state – but it was the best thing I ever did.” Lisa has been on her diet – cutting down on bread, sugar, fat and potatoes – for about a year. “I feel really good, I can walk further, I’ve lost weight from my face – and I’ve got a waist!” she says. “It’s nice going into shops like Next and being able to get into nice clothes. I can buy leggings size 16 and I’m aiming to get the five stone award.” Lisa says she feels healthier and more confident and her long term aims are to lose another five stone and to get a job. “I am on my own with four boys and I used to bring them to the crèche here at Friary. Now I usually come once a week and all the ladies here have supported me. I have got young kids and I don’t want to end up in a wheelchair – I want to be able to run and do activities with my boys.” at East Leake and the church there often provided gifts and harvest produce to help The Friary. So, there are many connections which all came together so that The Friary was the natural choice. “The highlight of my working with The Friary was the Christmas lunch – a time of goodwill when I was honoured to meet and talk to so many clients who appreciated the Christmas cheer and good food. It was heart-warming to hear their positive stories and plans to turn around their fortunes, get back into mainstream society and make their own way in the world. “I have held many successful fundraising Rushcliffe’s Mayor, Cllr Ron Hetherington, events this year which go a little way towards has been “touched and uplifted” by ensuring the Friary can continue its good spending time with his chosen charity and work. A few of the events that spring to mind their clients at The Friary in West Bridgford. include a Charles Hanson antique evening, the wonderful Djanogly Orchestra and many Each year the Mayor chooses a charity to more events and meals that have all been support by fundraising and increasing very enjoyable including a concert by the East awareness of their work. Leake Community Choir put on specially to The Mayor explains why he chose The Friary: support the Friary.” “Firstly, it is based in Rushcliffe and it does “I would urge anyone, or indeed any business, such good work to help people who are to give generously to this worthy cause.” homeless and disadvantaged. I was brought up in the Lake District and when I was young I remember my grandad telling me of the devastation he felt when he lost his job and was given just three days to move out of their tied cottage – no job and nowhere to live. He was lucky to have family support, but people at The Friary are not always so lucky. When I left home I went to Liverpool as a student apprentice and saw first hand the impact of unemployment which caused people to spiral downwards and these images have stayed with me. My wife Glynis was a former rector SCOUTS SLEEP-OUT! Thinking about others, completing their fund-raising badge and doing their bit for our local homeless and disadvantaged people... When asked why they chose to support the Friary, they said “The charity was chosen before the activity. After our talk from the Friary, all the scouts had agreed that they wanted to raise some money for the centre as A group of local children from the 4th West it was a local charity, providing a fundamental Bridgford Scouts based at the Methodist service to the local community. The challenge Church on Musters Road decided to organise was chosen after the talk so that we could a Sleep-over/Sleep-out in aid of the Friary. raise funds and awareness of the issue of After a talk from a member of staff at the Friary homelessness.” centre, all the scouts agreed that they would We asked some of the Scouts what they had to like to fundraise for a charity which was local to them. The stories that the scouts were told say about their experience….. about really hit home about how fortunate Lucy, aged 13: “Not everyone has a safe, warm they were, and how there are people in need; and sheltered place to sleep at night, this is right on their doorstep. why we decided to do the sponsored sleep out and raise awareness of the homeless in our With the help of older members doing the local area. Building our cardboard shelters may full “Sleep-out” on a very chilly night on 24th January they were able to raise approximately have been fun but it showed us the difficulties of living in the streets, especially because £2,500 for the Friary, some monies are still coming in. In total 21 Scouts (17 boys, 4 girls) there aren’t usually lots of cardboard boxes being handed out by scout leaders. It was joined in. surprising how warm it was when we calmed down enough to think about sleep. However, this was with four layers on, a sleeping bag and two friends beside me. The experience was one I will remember forever and it made me realise the real necessities of life.” BARBER SHOP TAKING A CUT FOR THE FRIARY! It takes a community to end homelessness and the residents of West Bridgford are stepping up to the mark. Our local people and businesses are doing their bit to help homeless and disadvantaged people right here on our doorstep. Our community continues to articulate with very practical steps how to get involved to end homelessness and this gives the message to our Service Users that they are valued and not forgotten. Here are some recent examples of local supporters: We are all aware that being homeless means you don’t have anywhere to call home but the underlying poverty can leave people feeling unwanted, unloved and uncared for too. People in our community are demonstrating that they want to help and have taken the initiative to raise not just money for but also awareness of the Friary. Warren’s Barber Shop in Gordon Square, West Bridgford held their 20th Anniversary event on Saturday 14th March. To mark this successful achievement and not wanting to take the glory for himself, the owner Warren Kent had nominated the Friary as the chosen charity to benefit from the extra publicity the event was due to attract. He had invited If you know of a group of people or an organisation who wants to get involved to raise money for and awareness of the Friary, please get in touch, we would love to hear from you and support you in your efforts. Email: [email protected] Daniel, aged 12: “I thought the evening was very good. I learned how it felt like to be homeless and will try my best to help raise awareness about them.” Peter, aged 11: “Overall, the whole night was very successful, but, most importantly, it made me think about what it is like to be homeless and in the future, I wish to get involved in more things that support the Friary. I think it was a good idea for a fundraising activity.” A huge thank you to the 4th West Bridgford Scouts for a great achievement in raising funds and awareness. Thank you for thinking of the Friary… various local musicians and artistes along to perform outside his shop, whilst the Friary sold raffle tickets, gave out leaflets and collected donations from the public and customers. Local businesses had donated generous prizes – all doing their bit to help us. The barber shop staff had dressed up, served drinks and supplied home-made cakes, all in aid of the Friary. It was a great community atmosphere and this drew quite a crowd on the day, as people mingled to celebrate with Warren they were also able to find out all about the Friary. Some local customers and business people also offered to help us in the future! Thank you to all who participated! SETTLING IN AT THE FRIARY been reduced in line with so many other government cutbacks. So that’s where I come in. Hi, I’m Helen Jones and I have been recruited as the new Marketing and Communications Officer for The Friary. What does that mean and why does this local charity need to appoint a new member of staff at a time of austerity? A marketing role is predominantly to raise awareness of a service or product. In reality we don’t need to advertise what we do at the Friary in order to attract customers, on the contrary, we have plenty! So, why a new Marketing Officer, I hear you ask? My role is to make sure as many people as possible get to know what the Friary does and why it needs your support. You may or may not know that the Friary has been around for over 25 years now. It is a “local” registered charity that serves a very wide community across Nottingham, helping the most marginalised people of our society including some rough sleepers. The success of the Friary so far has been helped by the wonderful and generous support of local people. Historically, we have received local authority funding, but sadly this has In taking on my new role I have been made aware that there are people who live in West Bridgford who still don’t know what the Friary does. I recognise that for the sake of asking, there are many people who might want to get involved. I don’t think anyone can disagree with the act of “helping those in need”. We have the expertise in-house to help vulnerable people in a very practical way but can only continue to do so if our staff and volunteers in turn are supported. Despite facing shrinking grants we don’t want to be forced to shrink the provision of care to our Service Users. On the contrary, we have plans to do even more! With a sustained high demand in the number of requests for help, we need to ask where would these people go if they couldn’t come to the Friary? We offer a bespoke service, we can help, we are happy to help but in turn we will rely on others to help us! Over the coming months, we will be creatively exploring initiatives both individually and corporately to raise awareness of the Friary and to increase our funding to support what we do. We will also be looking to involve ourselves in a Social Enterprise project soon too. Our website will keep you informed and we want you to look out for new fundraising opportunities in your existing community groups, in turn we will be able to support your initiatives by advertising via our website. I’m looking forward to getting on with my new role and I will certainly be glad to hear from you in the meantime with any fundraising ideas! MUSTERS ROAD OPEN GARDENS SECOND HAND BARGAIN SALES In 2012 and 2013, residents of Musters Road in West Bridgford opened their gardens, played host to hundreds of visitors and raised a very healthy sum for the Friary. The event is on again so make a note in your diaries and come along to support us: 46 Musters Road, West Bridgford NG2 7PR. 8 Saturday 9th May 2015 10 am – 12 noon 8 Saturday 11th July 2015 10 am – 12 noon Sunday 28th June 2015 2pm – 6pm Do you live on Musters Road and want to open your garden? Do you want to make a cake to sell on the day? THE MAYOR’S CHARITY GOLF EVENT In aid of the Friary. Friday 1st May 2015, 1.30 pm start Nottinghamshire Golf and Country Club, Stragglethorpe, Nottingham NG12 3HB. £140 for a team of four including coffee, Hot Carvery Buffet and Dessert from 5.30 pm. Contact the Mayor’s Secretary 0115 914 8521 [email protected] Do you want to volunteer to help before the event or on the day? We would love to hear from you so please get in touch. [email protected] Tel: 0115 981 0009 Join in and help us as we continue to work locally to end homelessness. You can find out more about our events and what’s going on by following us on twitter @theFriary88 Tackling disadvantage Changing lives WHAT IS THE FRIARY? WHERE TO FIND US The Friary exists to assist local disadvantaged people who are homeless, living in temporary accommodation or vulnerable from long-term unemployment. The Friary offers free support services such as advice, access to health services, tenancy support and employment skills. Recreational, educational and leisure time pursuits, along with essential social welfare provision all add to our visitors’ quality of life. The Friary is a faith based organization receiving substantial support from local churches and the community. The Friary is open to people of all faiths or none. 46 Musters Road Nottingham NG2 7PR Phone 0115 982 5448 Fax 0115 982 7228 [email protected] General Manager; Ann Bremner MBE Business Manager; Sam Crawford FRIARY OPENING TIMES Monday, Wednesday, Friday 9.00 am - 1.00 pm Sunday Evening Fellowship 8.00 pm - 9.00 pm www.the-friary.org.uk FACILITIES AND SERVICES AVAILABLE • Access to health services, including GP • Confidential information and advice • Practical welfare provision • Shower and laundry • Hairdressing / Barber • Cafe offering soups and snacks • Outreach services • Tenancy support • Dentistry • Chiropody • Optometry • IT Suite • Sunday Evening Fellowship Registered Charity Number 1056825 Company registered in England and Wales Number 3190740
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