How to get Married in Italy In Seventeen Easy Steps A Love Story By Al Guarino This is the tale of My beautiful new bride, Julie Hassel’s, and my whirlwind journey to get married in one of the most romantic (and bureaucratic) countries in all the world—Italy. I should point out at the start that the secret to fulfilling your dream of experiencing an Italian wedding is to secure the assistance of a good coordinator. After several blind stabs through the internet, we connected with a superb coordinator through the concierge desk of the Sofitel Hotel in Rome. Julie and I got off to a good start with the hotel when, while booking our reservation, we mentioned that our good friend Valentino Balboni , Lamborghini chief test driver, might visit us for a night. When we asked if the manager had heard of him, he elegantly responded “Madam, everyone in Italy knows of Valentino Balboni.” The concierge desk of the hotel introduced me to Ms. Laura Colavalle, the owner operator of ChocoEvents and Travels1. Laura was a goddess in taking care of the details of our wedding and we would not have succeeded without her. Several friends and coordinators said we simply could not get married in Italy in August with only four days to take care of the paperwork sandwiched around a 10 day cruise, but Laura made it happen. 2 But I get ahead of myself. Julie’s and my journey towards our August Italian Wedding started on the 4th of July, 2009, when Julie accepted my proposal of marriage while on board the USS Port Royale under the Pearl Harbor fireworks display. Julie and I are both widowed, and we both have two children from our prior marriages. After thinking of the 1 The happy family the night after the wedding, August 19, 2009 ChocoWeddings, Piazza Principe Umberto, 6/a, 06089 Torgiano (PG), Italy, Ph + 39 0757922736, Fax +39 0757922737, Mobile +39 339.6553588, www.chocoweddings.com, e-mails: [email protected] & [email protected], Skype: chocoevents.travels 2 No endorsement of the FOISOH is to be inferred or implied by this article. You should consult with your own professionals in making your plans, however if you don’t call Laura first you will regret it. guest list involved with having a marriage ceremony in Hawaii, we decided our best option to bring our two families together would be to get married while taking our new family on a European vacation. We looked at various vacation options, and ultimately decided being married while on a Western Mediterranean cruise was our best option. We shopped on-line, did our homework, looked at the marriage ceremony options advertised by the various cruise lines, and made our travel reservations. We were able to parlay this disconnect with the cruise line into a nice on-board upgrade to a penthouse suite for our cruise. Your humble writer, however, was left to unravel the intricacies of the Italian marriage ceremony without the assistance of our cruise line. I thought to myself, “no problem for an international lawyer like myself—I’ll be able to figure it out.” That was my first mistake. After much trial and error, here are my 17 simple steps to getting married in Italy. Step 1: Understand the procedure. First, I will give credit to FOISOH member Carmen DiAmore-Siah who introduced me to the Italian Consular Office in San Francisco. Mr. Aldo Mura (e-mail: [email protected], Phone: (415) 292-9215) was very helpful in deciphering the Italian marriage process. The US Embassy in Rome also has information regarding the process at: http://italy.usembassy.gov/acs/marriage/marriage-rome.asp . In order to get married in Italy, you will need to complete (1) an Atto Notario, or sworn statement certifying you are free to be married (which may be completed by the Italian Consular Office, or at any Tribunale Ordinario in Italy); (2) a Nula Osta, or “there are no impediments” which also certifies you are free to be married (which is completed via the US consular office in Italy), and take them to a Ufficio Matrimoni , or Marriage Office for (3) an appointment for making your Promessa di Matrimonio, or Declaration of Intent to Marry, certifying that you really want to get married, and (4) another appointment for the actual marriage ceremony, where you’ll finally be married. It sounds easy, right? Read on. Step 2: Get your required documents. As American citizens wishing to be married in Italy, each of you will need to have your passports, birth certificates, proof of termination of previous marriage. Also, if you will be married in the Roman Catholic Church, bring baptismal and confirmation certificates. Step 3: Obtain apostles for your required documents. Getting your documents may sound easy, but there is the wrinkle. Italy will not recognize governments documents prepared out of Country unless the documents are accompanied by a Hague Certification, or apostille, issued by the Secretary of State for the State that issued the document. This means that, rather than going to your files and pulling out a copy of your birth certificate, you need to contact the state in which you were born and obtain a certified true copy of the document from the records department, have the copy stamped as a “certified true copy” by the Dept. of Records, and then have your state’s Secretary of State issue an appostile for the document. In Hawaii, the Lt Gov serves as the Secretary of State for issuing the apostille. Step 4: Get all documents translated by a certified translator. Of course, many FOISOH members could do a fine job translating simple documents such as a birth certificate into Italian, however this is the government and the translation must be certified by an Italian Consular Officer. Aldo Mura in the San Francisco Consular office can perform this certification service for you. Step 5: Remember your proof of termination of prior marriage. As with your birth certificates, you must have a “certified true copy” of your documents prepared by the issuing state authority, accompanied by an appostile, and a translation certified by the Consular Office. Not all of the guidance regarding getting married in Italy includes this crucial piece of information, and this can lead to difficulties. If your documents are in the possession of the State of Hawaii, be prepared for very frustrating delays in obtaining your documents. In my case, I found myself picking up the appostile from the Hawaii LG office the day of our flight for Rome. Step 6: Avoid August. Apparently everyone in Italy (or in all of Europe, for that matter), goes to the beach in August. The only people left in Rome are sweaty tourists, numbly standing in line at St Peter’s Cathedral in Vatican City of trudging from site to site in the Eternal City with a blank stare on their faces and water bottles in their hands as they struggle through the 100 degree heat. No government offices are open (or so it seems), and getting anything done is twice as challenging. We had many people tell us that getting married in Rome in August was impossible. However Laura Colavalle was a champion coordinator and was able to find open offices to assist us through the journey. Step 6: Begin your travels, and Pray, Pray, Pray. After hustling through the various offices to obtain your documents (and your atto notorio if you traveled to an Italian consulate before your trip to Europe), you can sit back, relax, and enjoy your 21 hour flight to Rome. Julie and I filled our time wondering if our family members traveling from Honolulu, Seattle and Cambodia via Tokyo, Chicago and Dulles would all arrive on time and how we would be able to get to the Italian courthouse, the US Embassy, the tax office, and the cruise ship in the 8 hours we had between landing in Leonardo da Vinci airport at 8:00 am and getting to the port for our cruise departure at 4:00 p.m. My recommendation is to have a glass of Champaign, and remember to ask for the blessings of the patron saint of annoying government processes to be with you as you complete your journey. Step 7: Get your witnesses together. In order to complete your Atto Notorio, either in an Italian Consulate office in the United States or in a courthouse in Italy, you will need to have two witnesses, unrelated to you, who can attest that the information you have provided is true and that you are, indeed, free to be married. Unfortunately for us, we did not have any friends in Rome who were not related to us to attest. But, no problem—Laura came The happy couple, Laura, and our new best friends through and we met our new best friends, Francesco Licenziato and Chiara Licenziato, who were Laura’s husband and sister-in-law, on the steps of the Italian court house and they happily swore we were free to be wed (at least, as far as they knew). Step 8: Go to the Tribunale Ordinario. Of course, nothing in Italy in August is easy, but here again, working with a point of contact who knows every trick is the key. Laura was able to find the one court house in all of the entire province of Rome that was open on a Friday in August. The court house was located in the village of Albano Laziale. We bolted through the airport to get into a car for the journey once we landed. Amazingly, our four children, grandma, and sister Tina all had arrived from their various locations on time. We agreed they would proceed to the cruise ship and we hoped to meet them there after our office visits. We told them we would meet them in Livorno if we missed the sail time from Civitavecchia. Time was very tight, and only became tighter when I realized I had the kid’s cruise luggage tags in my folder. I raced back to give the tags to one of the kids and am lucky Julie didn’t leave for the courthouse without me. Our driver was an ace, and we arrived in Albano via every obscure, twisting road imaginable in no time. Once at the Court house, we met Laura and our new best friends, and made our way up a never-ending ramp to the fourth floor of the government building to the Tribunale Ordinario. There we waited while a young woman with purple hair smacked her gum and went through the process of stamping and filing innumerable pieces of paper for the one customer ahead of us in line. Twenty minutes later it was our turn and the purple haired girl looked with wonder as Laura laid out our paperwork in front of her. We took our chances and snuck this picture of the process despite the strict “No Photographs” policy in effect. Twenty minutes later, we left the Albano court house with a completed atto notorio and our new best friends, and were rocketing through the twisting roads of the Roman province on our way to the U.S. Embassy. Step 9: Go to the US Consulate Office. According to the US Embassy web site, their consular office is only open to process the nulla osta from 1:30-3:30, on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Of course, we were there on a Friday, were sailing in three short hours, and planned to be in Barcelona on the following Tuesday. Thankfully I had a friend in the Embassy from my Air Force days, and the Consular staff had a romantic heart. They were happy to extend hours to allow Julie and I come in for a special appointment. We passed the armed Carabinieri and were buzzed through three separate doors to reach the empty forms room to complete the application. Somewhere along this journey I realized this Nulla osta, certified the same thing as the atto notario—that Julie and I were free to be married. How many times would we need to collect signatures and pay for revenue stamps to certify the same thing? Unfortunately, while pondering this, I made three separate mistakes in filling out my information and had to start over each time (no cross outs allowed). I blame the roughly 36 hours without sleep by this time, but Julie is sure it was nerves. Step 10: Go to the tax office for your revenue stamps (marche da bollo). This was a step that Laura took care of for us. I wanted to see the office where she bought the marche da bollo, but we could nearly hear the ship’s horn blowing in Civitavecchia from the consular office in Rome, so we dove into our car and made our way to the ship. Step 11: Go on a relaxing 10 day Mediterranean Cruise (Optional). We bid Laura farewell as we left the atto notorio, nulla osta and planning with her. Our cruise was wonderful. Our driver made good time, and after trying to drop us off at the wrong ship (it’s amazing how many cruise ships they can squeeze into a port) we made it to the ship with at least 10 minutes to spare. We rocketed through the cavernous, empty passenger processing tent, drank or complimentary fruit punch, collected our boarding passes, and were on our way. We sailed through Livorno, Monte Carlo, Barcelona, Palma di Majorca, Tunisia, Palermo, Naples and back to Civitavecchia. It was a wonderful cruise with many stories that will wait for another time. Step 12: Schedule your appointments with the wedding hall. While we were cruising, Laura was working her magic and scheduled our next appointments for us. During the period following completion of the Nulla osta and atto notorio and holding the Promessa di Matrimonio and wedding ceremony, Italian law calls for an announcement of the scheduled wedding to be published in the city hall for two consecutive Sundays prior to the wedding. Thankfully, since neither Julie or I are Italian citizens, this requirement was waived in our case. If it’s not waived for you, I recommend a 20 day cruise. Step 13: Go to your appointment to give your Promessa di Matrimoni. We returned to Rome on a Monday, and Tuesday we were back on the road. This time, we were driving to the seaside town of Santa Marinella, which had the only open wedding hall within 100 miles of Rome. Laura met us at the city hall and we walked through the seemingly 400 year old hall way to sit in a nice private office where Julie and I were asked in a multitude of different ways if we understood that we were going to be married, and the gravity of our decision. Each question was translated for us and each of our answers were translated for the city official. After 30 minutes, we were on our way back to Rome for an afternoon of site seeing. Step 14: Go to your wedding ceremony. Our ceremony was presided over by the mayor of Santa Marinella, The Honorable Rosalia Giuliani. She was a vibrant woman who was very serious in ensuring we understood the legal and moral union we were entering into. She also looked great in her official colors and sun dress. The happy couple with her honor, the Mayor We were married in a beautiful seaside villa by the pier and pleasure boat harbor. Our four children, grandma, sister Tina, our two new best friends from the atto notario signing were present, while Laura translated. The breeze was gentle from the ocean, and the high-ceiling villa was cool despite the August sun outside. Santa Marinella It was a beautiful ceremony. Step 15: Hold your religious ceremony. Being married in the eyes of the Italian government is a wonderful thing, but many of us wish to celebrate our marriage in the eyes of God, with a religious wedding ceremony. Julie and I decided to celebrate our vows in a small ceremony on the veranda of our hotel. As a side note, the hotel was wonderful in supporting us in celebrating our marriage. We received Sofitel Hotel Hospitality complementary Champaign, a fruit plate, our own Roman Holiday post card greeting from the management, and were generally treated as royalty. Step 16: Receive your marriage license. Just as with our official documents in the United States being brought to Italy, we must have an appostile certificate for our wedding certificate and have an official translation of the document to show we are legally married. The good news is that Hawaii state law recognizes lawful marriages conducted outside the United States as legally binding in this country and there is no additional steps to take to recognize the marriage locally. We finally received our marriage certificate, with appostile, a month after the wedding ceremony. Step 17: Congratulazioni —You’re married! Live a happy life together knowing that if you can survive the Italian bureaucracy and intricacies of you can survive the trials of matrimony.
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