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104
Vol 10 • No 1 • JANUARY 2015
True Wealth IS What Yo U Ar E ,
Not What You Have!
SOME
SO
ME CLASSY Notes
Notes
from CLASSY U-E '52 Classmates & others...
A POEM THAT WAS US
A little house with three bedrooms,
A bathroom and one car on the street
A mower that you had to push
To make the grass look neat.
In the kitchen on the wall
We only had one phone,
And no need for recording things,
Someone was always home.
U-E
An Evening in December
.....For those of you
that didn’t know my
Dad was a drummer
in the U-E Colonial
Fife and Drum
Corps as well as the
U-E Concert Band.
The past few weeks
I’ve thought about
that and the role a
drummer plays in a
band. So I googled
it. By the way my
Dad, at 80 years old,
has just purchased his Mike and wife Vonnie (Balles) ‘58.
first computer. And now,
he, too, can google all sorts of things.
"A band without a secure, reliable, dynamic and expressive drummer is a band without a strong foundation."
In other words a band without a backbone. In life it is the
same. Where would WE be without a backbone, without
strength and guidance, keeping the tempo, leading by example? Where, Dad, would I be without you? Thank you for
giving me a strong foundation.
They say the greatest gift a man can give his children is to
love their mother. What a lucky daughter I am.
So now please raise a glass and join me in a toast to
Michael Livio Iannone, Happy 80th Birthday, we love you.
Salute!
Maria Iannone Evans U-E class of '81
[email protected]
I was my brother's (Mike Iannone's) e-mail carrier
for many years and I enjoyed doing it. Mike
received a computer during the Holidays. Now he
has his own e-mail address and will be receiving
his Newsletter monthly. I would appreciate if you could send
me the December Newsletter and place me on the list for
future Newsletters to me.
Mel. Your Newsletter is fantastic and enjoyed by me each
month especially the column about your Dad's speech about
downtown Endicott.
Eugene Iannone '48 [email protected]
We only had a living room
Where we would congregate,
Unless it was at mealtime
In the kitchen where we ate.
We only had one TV set
And channels maybe two,
But always there was one of them
With something worth the view
For snacks we had potato chips
That tasted like a chip.
And if you wanted flavor
There was Lipton's onion dip.
Weekends were for family trips
Or staying home to play
We all did things together –
Even go to church to pray.
When we did our weekend trips
Depending on the weather,
No one stayed at home because
We liked to be together.
Sometimes we would separate
To do things on our own,
But we knew where the others were
Without our own cell phone
Then there were the picnics
at the peak of summer season,
Pack a lunch and find some trees
And never need a reason.
Get a baseball game together
With all the friends you know,
Have real action playing ball –
And no game video.
Remember when the doctor
Used to be the family friend,
And didn't need insurance
Or a lawyer to defend
The milkman used to go
From door to door,
And it was just a few cents more
Than going to the store.
The mailman knew each house
by name
And knew where it was sent;
There were not loads of mail
addressed To "present occupant”
They didn't look like turtles
Trying to squeeze out every mile;
They were streamlined, white walls,
and fins
And really had some style
One time the music that you played
Whenever you would jive,
Was from a vinyl, big-holed record
Called a forty-five
Oh sure, we had our problems then,
Just like we do today
And always we were striving,
Trying for a better way.
Oh, the simple life we lived
Still seems like so much fun,
How can you explain a game,
Just kick the can and run?
This life seemed so much easier
Slower in some ways
I love the new technology
But I sure do miss those days.
So time moves on and so do we
And nothing stays the same,
But I sure love to reminisce
And walk down memory lane.
With all today's technology
We grant that it's a plus!
But it's fun to look way back and
say,
HEY LOOK, GUYS,
THAT WAS US!
Joan (Hickey) & BobPulse
[email protected]
U-E
1
INTEREST
POINTS
INTERESTING
nder
g h t s t oofPo
Some Thou
UNBELIEVABLE FACTS TO KNOW?
A SHOT OF WHISKEY:
In the old west a .45 cartridge for a six-gun cost 12 cents, so did
a glass of whiskey. If a cowhand was low on cash he would often
give the bartender a cartridge in exchange for a drink.This
became known as a "shot" of whiskey.
THE WHOLE NINE YARDS:
American fighter planes in WWII had machine guns that were
fed by a belt of cartridges. The average plane held belts that were
27 feet (9 yards) long. If the pilot used up all his ammo he was
said to have given it the whole nine yards.
BUYING THE FARM:
This is synonymous with dying. During WW1 soldiers were
given life insurance policies worth $5,000. This was about the
price of an average farm so if you died you "bought the farm"
for your survivors.
IRON CLAD CONTRACT:
This came about from the ironclad ships of the Civil War.
It meant something so strong it could not be broken.
PASSING THE BUCK / THE BUCK STOPS HERE:
Most men in the early west carried a jack knife made by the
Buck knife company. When playing poker it as common to place
one of these Buck knives in front of the dealer so that everyone
knew who he was. When it was time for a new dealer the deck of
cards and the knife were given to the new dealer. If this person
didn't want to deal he would "pass the buck" to the next player.
If that player accepted then "the buck stopped there."
RIFF RAFF:
The Mississippi River was the main way of traveling from north to
south. Riverboats carried passengers and freight but they were
expensive so most people used rafts. Everything had the right of
way over rafts which were considered cheap. The steering oar on the
rafts was called a "riff" and this transposed into riff-raff, meaning
low class.
COBWEB:
The Old English word for "spider" was "cob."
SHIP STATE ROOMS:
Traveling by steamboat was considered the height of comfort.
Passenger cabins on the boats were not numbered. Instead
they were named after states. To this day cabins on ships are called
staterooms.
SLEEP TIGHT:
Early beds were made with a wooden frame. Ropes were tied across
the frame in a criss-cross pattern. A straw mattress was then put on
top of the ropes. Over time the ropes stretched, causing the bed to
sag. The owner would then tighten the ropes to get a
better night's sleep.
SHOWBOAT:
These were floating theaters built on a barge that was pushed by a
steamboat. These played small town along the Mississippi River.
Unlike the boat shown in the movie "Showboat," these did not have
an engine. They were gaudy and attention grabbing which is why
we say someone who is being the life of the party is "showboating."
OVER A BARREL:
In the days before CPR, a drowning victim would be placed face
down over a barrel and the barrel would be rolled back and forth in
a effort to empty the lungs of water. It was rarely effective. If you
are over a barrel you are in deep trouble.
BARGE IN:
Heavy freight was moved along the Mississippi in large barges
pushed by steamboats. These were hard to control and would sometimes swing into piers or other boats. People would say they
"barged in."
HOGWASH:
Steamboats carried both people and animals. Since pigs smelled so
bad they would be washed before being put on board. The mud and
other filth that was washed off was considered useless "hog wash."
CURFEW:
The word "curfew" comes from the French phrase "couvre-feu,"
which means "cover the fire." It was used to describe the time of
blowing but all lamps and candles. It was later adopted into Middle
English as "curfeu," which later became the modern "curfew." In the
early American colonies homes had no real fireplaces so a fire was
built in the center of the room. In order to make sure a fire did not
get out of control during the night it was required that, by an agreed
upon time, all fires would be covered with a clay pot called a "curfew."
BARRELS OF OIL:
When the first oil wells were drilled they had made no provision for
storing the liquid so they used water barrels. That is why, to this day,
we speak of barrels of oil rather than gallons.
HOT OFF THE PRESS:
As the paper goes through the rotary printing press,
friction causes it to heat up. Therefore, if you grab the
paper right off the press it’s hot. The expression means
to get immediate information.
Bob Henning
[email protected]
Phyllis Dillerisms
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age.
As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like
shovelling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.
The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them
would never wear the same outfit in public.
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I
want to move in with them.
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is
the only thing that keeps some parents going.
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives
teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years
telling them to sit down and shut up.
Ed Misulich
[email protected]
Best way to get rid of kitchen odours: Eat out.
U-E
2
from the Rev...
Rev Lois (Pascoe) Morgan
[email protected]
T
TRADITION
Greeks too have an extremely sharp sense of identity, which may or
may not include others. We also learned (painfully) along the way
that Greek people will put up with anything but being confused
with Turks.
So while our traditions didn't so much change willingly,
but with a bombast our Christmases had never before seen, it
was good.
Many of our other family traditions changed as the "kids"
(those under fifty) who had the nerve to marry people of their own
choice did just that. We began as those wary of anything different in
our tradition, and ended up slightly sweaty with effort devoted to
never hurting anyone's feelings.
We learned a lot, mostly about ourselves, and finally
learned to love how our family was now. Our family members married those of Hispanic descent, those of Native American descent
and even someone from the American South! The food traditions of
each of these backgrounds has added something immeasurable to
our otherwise lily white table. Who had ever heard of enchiladas
and potato salad for Christmas dinner, for instance? Who had ever
dug into an Indian fried pie while humming along to Silent Night?
And who for heaven's sake, had ever eaten corn bread stuffing?
Now, from this tell all you can see how dull and cut and
dried our family had been, and how it was all changing, even though
some of it was with a rolling of the eyes and a feeling that we could
never get used to this new way.
And then as these American stories usually go, we not only
got used to all of the newness, we craved it and looked forward to
eating our cornbread and Black eyed peas on New Years.
So, while tradition has its well earned place, so does innovation and disparity. Doing anything without respite for a hundred
years gets so dull and worn out, it's hard to even put it into words.
And saying "Well this is how we've always done it, " doesn't fly very
well, either.
If I have learned one valuable thing along the years of my
life it's that we never really know where our blessings will come
from. Our put together, never- do- anything- different lifestyles need
to be rousted once in a while, if only to create a new sense of
wonder in our old noggins.
Our country also has need, from time to time, of newness
and new thought and a new application of old mores and ways of
doing things.
One of my grandsons went overboard on this new thing
business and was baptized twice. When I asked him why he had
done this, since he knew that he had been baptized as an infant, by
me, as it turned out, he said,"Well, Grandma, I wanted to make sure
this took!"
So while I have never been able to become Italian, even by
marriage, I have been able to occasionally put my old fuddy duddy
ways behind me and learn to eat both baklava and grits for
Christmas Dinner.
he more things change the more they remain
the same.
Not always. When some things change, they can never again be the
same, hard as we might try. Some of this is due to the fact that we
want everything at all times, to be just what we want it to be. That
has never happened in the history of the world, and probably won't,
either.
Happy things can remain in our memories longer than they
remain in reality. Take Christmas for instance. Holiday gatherings of
our childhood can still be quite easily remembered, even in our older
age. When our family put up the tree, how many people usually
came for Christmas Dinner, what gifts we got on which Christmas,
what the weather was like, and things like that. Putting it all together,
we call it "tradition", that blessed term.
We love tradition and would never deliberately get rid of it.
We then get rid of it several times in the course of normal family
life. Every time a child gets married, or a new baby joins the club,
tradition quakes and shivers, knowing that it is about to be shaken
up at best or thrown completely out, at worst.
When I was a child, in and around Endicott, I always
wished I was Italian. It seemed to me that Italian families had more
fun, and better food than our family had at holidays. Actually, what
I wished for was the solidarity I saw in Italian families. To have
everybody gather at Grandma's house on Sunday was something I
always admired. and to eat the same food year in and year out,
apparently, would be like heaven on earth. I also liked the quintessential Italian personality. My family was always very quiet (both
sides) and never raised their voices let alone argue at the dinner
table. When I would hear about Italian families who never agreed to
disagree, but fought it out, each time the subject came up, I would
silently add my Hurrah to the mix.
I never was able to change my ethnicity, nor did I marry an
Italian fellow, so that dream was quashed. I have raised a few children who are Italian like in their ability to turn the dinner table into
CNN, NBC and FOX news with their biased viewpoints on everything under the sun.
Our Morgan traditions started out with my long held
notions (encouraged by my parents) of what tradition should look
like. My husband had never had a family which held to tradition
since they had never had any traditions so he went along with my
family. And then came the apple that upset the cart!
My brother married a Greek woman! Turns out Greek
people have their own long standing traditions and they don't give
them up lightly. Different food, (some unpronouncable); different
versions of Santa, different churches at midnight and yes, even a
different day for Christmas!
Easygoing as our family was, that seemed almost like
heresy. But, we realized that our brother was hell-bent on staying
married to the alien woman (as we saw her) so we would go along
with the program. Well, you know how that all turned out: we went
from all bland white potatoes mashed to baklava sweet and everything in between. We learned about January 6th and why it has a
special significance as well as December 25th does. We learned that
Happy New Year to all and try something new, why don't you?
###
U-E
3
t o Po n d e r
T h o u g htot sNOTE
S o m e NOTES
“Just wonderin”
I Hate These Smart Techies!
Editor's Note: I receive the emails from Walt for "Just wonderin"
and reprint/share many in this Newsletter column.
***
Suspensions of pro athletes for domestic abuse have been rife.
This is being blamed on the violence of football. Don't the
media and public realize that football has always been violent
and what has changed is our society and upbringing?
"Just wonderin"
As we Silver Surfers know, sometimes we have trouble with
our computers.
Yesterday, I had a problem, so I called Georgie, the
11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission
Control, and asked him to come over.
Georgie clicked a couple of buttons and solved the
problem. As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So,
what was wrong?
He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired,
'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it
again.'
Georgie grinned..'Haven't you ever heard of an
ID ten T error before?
'No,' I replied.
'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure
it out.'
So I wrote down:
ID10T
I used to like Georgie, the little Butthead.
Joan (Hickey) Pulse
[email protected]
Dairy Queen conducted a survey regarding why customers
do not return to a restaurant after eating there. The results
showed that the number one reason at 69% was poor and/or
abusive service help. The next reasons were in the single digit
percentage. This should be the easiest thing to
fix by the owners, shouldn't it?
"Just wonderin"
There has been talk and polls taken about states leaving the
union i.e. Alaska, California, Texas. California has led the
polls by a mile by citizens wanting that state to be voted out.
Alaska has started a petition to leave and join Russia.
Are people that unhappy and things that bad and
what has brought it about?
"Just wonderin"
U-E
Bought vs Homemade
Six year old Annie returns home from school and says that
today she had her first family planning lesson at school.
Her mother, very interested, asks: "Oh... How did it go?"
"I nearly died of shame!" she answers. "Sam from down
the street says the stork brings babies. Sally next door said
you can buy babies at the orphanage. Pete in my class says
you can buy babies at the hospital."
Her mother answers laughingly, "But that’s no reason to be
ashamed."
"No... but I can't tell them that we were so poor that you
and daddy had to make me yourselves!"
We are getting closer to a "digital wallet" every day.
Iowa has started testing an app driver's license in lieu of the
photo ID card. Aren't things complicated enough?
"Just wonderin"
A high school football coach in North Carolina was called
out onto the field at halftime and had no idea why.
His gowned fiance appeared and they were married in a
surprise wedding. Oh, yes, his team won. Nice story?
"Just wonderin"
Bob Henning [email protected]
UE Weekly Email Site
Thanksgiving dinner tales an average of 18 hours to prepare
but is consumed in 12 minutes. Halftime takes 12 minutes.
Coincidence?
"Just wonderin"
UE
Union • Endicott
Central School District
The Dept of Justice says that Native Americans can grow and
sell pot on their own lands. Are these the same people who
are offended and discriminated against by the use of the
Washington Redskin nicknameThe Dept. of Justice says that
Native Americans can grow and sell pot on their own lands.
Are these the same people who are offended and discriminated
against by the use of the Washington Redskin nickname?
"Just wonderin"
Here’s an interesting site to bowse...
http://www.uek12.org/CommunityAlumni.aspx
This is a site that the U.E. School District
makes available online. It might be fun to link in
and see what’s going on and you might even see
names and photographs of ‘52 Alumni/children
and others over the years.
I’m sure it will bring back some related old
memories...enjoy.
Connie (Hronis) & Walt Klimash
[email protected]
U-E
4
s t o Po n d e r
T h o u gofh tYesterday
e Touch
S o mA
LOOKING BACK
A New Musical!
Share this with your friends, children and/or
grandchildren!
The year is 1910, over one hundred years ago.
What a difference a century makes!
The story of a young boy who's making his way in the
early 1940s. The musical takes place in Endicott, New
York in 1941 and 1942, when the Endicott-Johnson
Company was at its height! Love, family dysfunction, and
the threat of WWII, brings you back into a time when the
American dream was alive. A time we know as the
"Golden Days."
Golden Days is a brand new Broadway-styled musical
written by Endicott, NY local and Broadway performer,
Daniel Kermidas. The show's workshop at the Endicott
Performing Arts Center from January of 2014 is now
returning to Endicott for the premiere of the full stage
production. Join us as "Golden Days" continues its journey
to the "Big Apple" where the creators have high hopes for
success. It is a unique event to experience the creation of a
new musical.
All who were lucky enough to get a ticket to see last year's
sold-out workshop performances of the show will enjoy the
revamped new scenes and songs. The Endicott Performing
Arts Center is excited to be presenting the first ever musical
about Endicott and the Golden Days of our town.
A Red Carpet Opening Night! On January 9th the marquee will be lit, the performers will warm up, the orchestra
will tune, and Golden Days will open with a VIP-Red Carpet
Event. At 7:30pm on Opening night, EPAC will host a VIP
Gala. With a purchase of a VIP ticket, audience members
will enjoy a meet & great reception with the Writer and the
two leads of the show 30 min prior to openning. There will
also be refreshments and production material set up for VIP's
to get a behind-the-scenes look at "Golden Days".
Here are some statistics for the Year 1910
(applies to the USA):
• The average life expectancy for men was 47 years.
• Fuel for this car was sold in drug stores only.
• Only 14 percent of the homes had a bathtub.
• Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone.
• There were only 8,000 cars & only 144 miles of paved roads.
• The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.
• The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower !
• The average US wage in 1910 was 22 cents per hour.
• The average US worker made between $200 & $400 per yr.
• A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per yr.
• A dentist $2,500 per year, a veterinarian between $1,500
and $4,000 per year,
• A mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.
• More than 95 percent of all births took place at HOME.
• 90% of all Doctors had NO COLLEGE EDUCATION!
• Instead, they attended so-called medical schools, many of
which were condemned in the press AND the government
as 'substandard.'
• Sugar cost four cents a pound.
• Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen.
8 Coffee was fifteen cents a pound.
• Most women only washed their hair once a month, and
used Borax or egg yolks for shampoo.
• There was no such thing as under arm deodorant or
tooth paste.
• Canada passed a law that prohibited poor people from
entering into their country for any reason.
• The five leading causes of death were:
1. Pneumonia and influenza
2, Tuberculosis
3. Diarrhea
4. Heart disease
5. Stroke
• The American flag had 45 stars.
• The population of Las Vegas Nevada was only 30!
• Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and iced tea hadn't been
invented yet
• There was no Mother's Day or Father's Day.
• Two out of every 10 adults couldn't read or write and only
6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school.
• 18% of households had at least one full-time servant or
domestic help.
• There were about 230 reported murders in the ENTIRE
U.S.A.! (yes, people have changed)
• I am now going to forward this to someone else without
typing it myself. From there, it will be sent to others all
over the WORLD...all in a matter of seconds! Try to imagine
what it may be like in another 100 years!
If you missed this great performance...you can see it on
YOUTUBE by linking on to:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdkqgmlBfo
&feature=youtu.be
U-E
A PERFECT FIT
The Circus was in town and I got a testimonial from one of
the many happy cutomers from a couple generations ago.
I am sure you were also a happy customer during
your growing up days in Endicott.!
Mayor John Bertoni ‘67 [email protected]
U-E
5
The
Old and New
Memories
from Endicott's
Mayor,UEHS
Class of '67...
Endicott Mayor
John Bertoni ‘67
Tiger's
Tale
[email protected]
Editor's Note:
The Newsletter receives so many
interesting/related emails from
this distinguished U-E graduate
prolific emailer that he certainly
deserves his own page.
Endicott Trustees Swearing In Ceremony
As Mayor, I want to think I do all I can to be an honest governing official, number one cheerleader for the Village of Endicott, as
much a gladhander as I can anywhere from out of town to the
Price Chopper. A Mayor who always takes time to listen, to praise,
handle complaints, answer questions regarding happenings, concerns
regarding crime, and often questions about my own health and
family.
I turned 66 this past December 29th and while my doctor
would like me to be in better health, I feel good as I start my 8th
enjoyable year as Mayor. My intention, given my doctor's blessing, is to run again and maybe even have some help from many
who think I am doing the best I can given the current State of
Affairs not only locally but Statewide and Nationally.
Of course my Family is always first with me so I would
also take into account their feelings although they often refer me
to being in my element as Mayor.
I have learned a lot about people still and their hope for
peace and the good life we often talk about here in days gone by.
We all had situations that we may have forgotten as they seemed
big at the time but now, as we grow older, priorities far outweigh
those we experienced.
I of course could not do this alone and as the Trustee
Board of Dave Baker, and Cheryl Chapman took place this
December 31 with Judge Theo Totolis presiding and Trustees
Frank Flint and Eileeen (Jim Forbes daughter Koneckny watching
... it was a happy moment to see this and know while we far and
away do not see eye to eye on everything, we all have the same
intentions of a better Endicott in our hearts.
While I am far and away having more years of growing
up and living here--we will continue to agree, disagree and agree
to disagree on many programs for the future. But that is what
politics is all about. I have served with many wonderful and
dedicated people throughout my years of service. I was 6 years as
Trustee with wonderful Boards, Town of Union Supervisor with
some excellent people of sound minds and heart and Union
Endicott School Board member again giving me another dimension to see as a Community representative, and now as Mayor for
7 plus years.
The work never stops when it comes to a community.
Every day whether it is dealing with money, employees, the seasons of New York that require different apparatus, jobs for that
season or just the joy of seeing a successful event and the people
enjoying it, the satisfaction and determination to do it better never
stops.
As usual, I took my time off from Endicott this January
1st to visit family in Florida (as many do or for some other reason
like getting out of the cold although they should come up for a
word for that. It seems anyone over 55 anymore cannot take the
cold despite growing up and living it all their life...oh well).
Getting back to the many I have served with and the list
goes on for the last 34 years; it is with that I say thank you to the
present and past colleagues in the “Ring of Politics” that have all
helped me to be where I am today...a very happy, thankful and caring Mayor. I love this Village when I was 12 years old where one
really begins to see its friendship, its culture, and its foreverness.
We know that never leaves us despite the changing demographics,
the loss of friends, neighbors and family. But rest assured I intend
to be here as this my eighth year chugs along. I hope to serve your
hopes and past fancys as you remember them and take your compliments and criticisms as constructive words from seasoned
Endicotters who the Village developed under your experiences.
Life is good as we always hoped it is. The weather can
always be better here and elsewhere. I hope you always include
Endicott in your good wishes as "there is no place like home".
Happy New Year to you all and a healthy life to you now
and forever...the Village is in good hands...rest assured.
###
Photo includes front:
Trustee Eileen Koneckny (Jim
Forbes daughter),
Mayor Bertoni,
Trustee Cheryl Chapman.
Back row: Trustee Dave Baker,
Attorney Charles Collison,
Trustee Frank Flint,
Clerk Treasurer Anthony Bates.
Endicott Village
Board Trustees
Swearing In
Ceremony
2015
U-E
6
Endicott Photos of Today
UEHS new baseball scoreboard at the
Pete Sylvester Park.
Another year well done in Endicott .
UEHS
"Tiger's Pride"
Marching Band wins
2014 NYS
Championship.
Photos by Jim Ciotoli
7
PoItn d e r
t o of
h t sFun
o u gthe
e T hfor
S o mRead
GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN
THE PROCESS, GRANDCHILDREN!)
A Little Fun With Words.
"Lexophile" is a word used to describe those that have a
love for words,such as "you can tune a piano, but you can't
tuna fish", or "to write with a broken pencil is pointless." A
competition to see who can come up with the best lexophiles
is held every year in an undisclosed location.
This year's winning submission is posted at the very end.
To those of us who have children in our lives,
whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces,
nephews, or students.... Here is something to
make you chuckle.
Whenever your children are out of control, you can take
comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did
not extend to His own children. After creating heaven and
earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said
was 'DON'T! '
'Don't what ?' Adam replied.
'Don't eat the forbidden fruit.' God said.
Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve….
we have forbidden fruit! '
' No Way ! '
'Yes way! '
'Do NOT eat the fruit! ' said God.
'Why? '
'Because I am your Father and I said so ! ' God replied,
wondering why He hadn't stopped creation after making the
elephants. A few minutes later, God saw His children having
an apple break and He was ticked ! 'Didn't I tell you not to
eat the fruit? ' God asked.
'Uh huh,' Adam replied.
'Then why did you? ' said the Father.
'I don't know,' said Eve.
'She started it! ' Adam said.
'Did not ! '
'Did too! '
'DID NOT! '
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was
that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus
the pattern was set and it has never changed.
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children
wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself.
If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it
would be a piece of cake for you ?
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to
walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to
sit down and shut up.
4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat
word for word what you shouldn't have said.
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind
yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY:
Be nice to your kids….They will choose your nursing home
one day!
AND FINALLY: If you have a lot of tension and you
get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle:
take two aspirin' and 'keep
Ron Avery
away from children'!
[email protected]
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.
The batteries were given out free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth & nail.
A will is a dead giveaway.
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
Police were summoned to a daycare center where a threeyear-old was resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut
off? He's all right now.
A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully
recovered.
He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought
she'd dye.
Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.
And the cream of the twisted crop:
Those who get too big for their pants will be totally
exposed in the end.
Molly (Magee) Stegeman '54
[email protected]
U-E
Ya Better Believe It!
U-E
8
Some Thoughts to PonderS o m e T h o u g h t s
RANDOM THOUGHTS FOR 2015
CONGRATULATIONS
CONGRATULATIONS
HAPPY
HAPPY DAY
DAY &
& YEARS
YEARS AHEAD!!
AHEAD!!
Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators.
We haven't met yet!
RY
J A N U A th
I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks!
81
st +/-
Dottie (Brunick) Gibbons 1-9-35
Old age is coming at a really bad time!
Count your life
by smiles, not tears,
count your age by friends, not years.
When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ...
Now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation!
The biggest lie I tell myself is ... "I don't need to write that
down, I'll remember it."
U-E
A
Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot
change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends
to post my bail when I finally snap!
Drum Roll Please...
I know a guy who's addicted to brake
fluid. He says he can stop any time.
How does Moses make his tea?
Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it
dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club,
but I'd never met herbivore.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on
words.
When chemists die, they barium.
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type-o.
This dyslexic man walks into a bra...
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.
I didn't like my beard at first. But it grew on me.
How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job =
because she couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
What does a clock do when it's really hungry? It goes back
four seconds.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
Broken pencils are just pointless.
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not
so sure.
Bob Henning
[email protected]
I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights". I'm just
very wise.
My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that
needs work.
Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order
is just a piece of paper.
If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would've put them on
my knees.
The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text
back "no" which is shorter than "yes".
I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what
I'll do that second week.
I've lost my mind and I'm pretty sure my kids took it!
Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... But it can muffle the sound!
Why do I have to press one for English when you're just
gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
Lord, Give me patience and give it to me NOW.
Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.
At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and
remembering what I came in there for.
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the
dryer for ten minutes; come out wrinkle-free and
three sizes smaller!
Molly (Magee) Stegeman '54
[email protected]
U-E
9
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U-E
Please let me know if there is an error, addition, omission, if you are receiving the Newsletter through someone else and
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Guilfoyle
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10
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HBE (Scranton '65)
Mayor John Bertoni '67
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*US Mail
‘5 2 NEWSLETTER--OLD & NEW NE W S
KLINE'S
THE BISCUITS
You know, life is full of
imperfect things . . . and imperfect
people. I'm not the best at hardly anything, and I forget birthdays and
anniversaries just like everyone else.
What I've learned over the years is that
learning to accept each others faults
and choosing to celebrate each others
differences, is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing
and lasting relationship.
So . . . please pass me a
biscuit. And yes, the burned one will
do just fine! And please pass this
along to someone who has enriched
your life . . . I just did!
Life is too short to wake up
with regrets . . . Love the people who
treat you right and forget about the
ones who don't.
ENJOY LIFE NOW - IT HAS AN
EXPIRATION DATE !
Happy New Year!
Joe Svoboda '58
[email protected]
U-E
May your troubles be less, your blessings more,
And may nothing but happiness come through your door.
Molly (Magee) Stegeman '54 [email protected]
U-E
T H A N K YO U
for your recent contribution towards
the UEHS Class of ‘52 Newsletter.
EARL BLOOM ‘51
U-E
Even though you might have sent
in your update and thoughts used in
previous issues...please send in MORE
of your OLD news/thoughts/memories/photos and NEW news of yourself or classmates.
Your Self-Appointed Designated
Editor will print anything (almost
anything) to be shared with your U-E
Class of '52.
The Newsletter is designed to be a convenient electronic communicator, in
this world of technology, for the UEHS
Class of '52.
[email protected]
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back issues are even there!
11
T
hank
you
...for the
opportunity
to put together
this Newsletter.
Mel Kline
Self-Appointed
Designated Editor
KORNER
When I was a kid, my mom liked to
make breakfast food for dinner every
now and then. And I remember one
night in particular, when she had made
breakfast after a long, hard day at
work. On that evening so long ago, my
mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage,
and extremely burned biscuits in front
of my dad.
I remember waiting to see if
anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did,
was reach for his Biscuit, smile at my
mom and ask me how my day was at
school.
I don't remember what I told
him that night, but I do remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for
burning the biscuits. And I'll never
forget what he said: "Honey, I love
burned biscuits."
Later that night, I went to kiss
Daddy good night and I asked him if
he really liked his biscuits burned.
He wrapped me in his arms and said,
"Your momma put in a long hard day at
work today and she's real tired. And
besides . . . a burnt biscuit never hurt
anyone!"
The Empty Pickle Jar
A professor stood before his philosphy class
holding a large and empty pickle jar. When
the class began he proceeded to fill the jar
with golf balls. He then asked the students if
the jar was full. Thet agreed that it was.
So the professor then picked up a box of
pebbles and poured them into the jar. The pebbles
rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He asked the studenrts again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand
and poured it into the jar. Of course the sand
filled up everything else. He asked once more
if the jar was full. They responded with an
uinanimous “yes”.
The professor than produced a bottle of
chocolate milk from under the table. He then
poured it into the jar effectively filling the
empty space between the sand. The students
laughed.
“Now”, said the professor, “I want you to
recognize that this jar represents your life.”
The golf balls are the important
things...your family and children, your health
and friends.
The pebbles are the other things that matter... like your job, your home, yoiur car.
The sand is everything else, the small stuff.
If you put the sand into the jar first, there is
no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The
same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on
the small stuff, you will never have room for
the things that make you happy.
Play with children, get regular checkups,
enjoy dinner with friends and family. There will
always be time to clean the house.
Take care of the golf balls first, the things
that really matter. Set your priorities...the rest
is just sand.
One student asked, “what about the chocolate milk?” The professor responded,
“No matter how full your life may seem, there’s
always room for chocolate.”
Remember every day is a gift...and the
quality of your life is your gift to yourself.
###
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