1. business and industrial

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On Mentors and Coaches!
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Self- coaching!
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Is it simple to coach yourself?
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Yes and no. The advantage of a coach is that he offers a
different set of eyes and a different perspective, in some
cases holding up the mirror. The value of coaching lies
precisely in the fact that the coach is not you and can see
things you can’t.
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On the other hand, yes. If coaching is creating an
environment in which a person learns and performs, then we
do that for ourselves all the time. Unfortunately, our Self One
usually creates the environment in which we perform; that is
not always conducive to our being best. By listening to a
good coach, we can more easily ignore the overly critical and
controlling voices within us.
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One of the primary functions of the coach is to help the
learner improve his internal dialogue. So perhaps the best
answer to that question is this: it is most important that we
improve our capacity for self-coaching. To that end, periodic
good coaching from another can be very helpful.
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Becoming your own CEO!
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Imagine that some distant rich relative named you in his will,
and you are now the chief executive officer of a corporation.
On a Saturday morning, you are handed the keys to the
corporate offices. You go there, find the place empty, and sit
down in the CEO’s office in that big plush leather chair.
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You know nothing about this corporation, but you’ve been
handed this official piece of paper that says you are
responsible for all of its future decisions. What are you going
to do?
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What business are you in? You will have to learn everything
you can about the products and services it produces, the
human and physical resources, its earnings and financial
assets, and so on. And you have to look at major strategies,
mission statements, values, policies, organizational
structures, and the software that runs the business. As the
CEO, of course, you can change anything that is not to your
liking. You can disband the company, expanded, or keep it
the way it is.
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At the root of the word “corporation” is the Latin word
corpus, meaning body, and you’ve been handed the body of
an organization. You could have gotten the body of a
grasshopper, a rhinoceros, a hummingbird, or an aunt. What
you are lucky: your distant rich relative handed you the keys
to that Lexus of bodies, the human body, one superbly
equipped with a very functional set of software. The
corporation is really you. What are you going to do as the
CEO of your own corporation?
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What’s the state of your hardware and software, the
resources of the senses, your physical being, and your brain?
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What’s going on in the research and development
department?
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What kinds of investments can be made in the short run and
the long run?
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What production capacities does your corporation have in
language, math/logic, intuition, creativity, imagination,
communications, labor, dexterity, artistic abilities, emotion,
appreciation, wonder, joy, happiness, gratitude, love, joy,
satisfaction, fulfillment, tranquility, harmony, meaning,
purpose, choice, trust, mindfulness, humor and respect?
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Where and how can you enhance those capacities?
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What’s your product or service? What’s your mission
statement?
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Do people own stock in your corporation? Stockholders have
voting rights in deciding how your corporation will be run, in
making decisions about your life. Be alert to those who want
shares in your corporation for little or no return. To whom did
you sell shares, and for what? Approval and acceptance? To
avoid conflict or punishment? Love? Money? Protection?
Certainty? Security? Power, success or control? Sex?
Friendship? Perhaps you traded shares in your corporation for
shares in someone else’s corporation. Perhaps you’ve made
agreements with other CEOs to collaborate, or give partial
ownership to another CEO for whom you work. Can you buy
back shares? That’s not an easy task. If you buy them back,
you risk losing the price you paid in terms of friendship,
acceptance, etc. Are you willing to accept more responsibility
for the condition of your life when you buy back their shares?
Be alert to the urge to compensate for lost shares by making
an effort to gain a controlling interest in someone else’s
corporation.
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Who’s on your life’s board of directors? Are your parents on
the board? Your spouse? Your closest friends? Your boss?
Who is the director of finance, public relations, family affairs,
recreation, community service? Who runs the offices of
training, education and career development?
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Some board members may not always see eye to eye with
the CEO, and some of them may have loyalties that belong
elsewhere. Your job as the CEOs to get the best possible
alignment behind your vision, and to get as many of these
departments synchronized as possible.
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Hold an imaginary board meeting. Some possible agenda
items: Where are the outstanding shares, and should you
buy any of them back? What is your product line, now or in
the future? What’s the primary mission statement? Does it
need clarification? What are the corporate strengths,
weaknesses and priorities? How’s your corporate mobility? Is
it able to move and be moved? What in your departmental
matters needs work? What kinds of resources can be found
for R&D, and how should they be used? What important
issues are being avoided? When will the board meeting
again?
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When you recognize that you are the CEO of your own
corporation, it becomes easier to view others as equals and
to give them the respect due to sovereign entities. Free
people make agreements for mutual interest; they don’t sell
themselves. They only have a need to protect and preserve
their own inherent freedom and mobility.
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The Inner Game of Work, W. Timothy Gallwey, Random House,
2000. [Aimed at the corporate / management market, its sections
on coaching are exceptional for their insights on how to empower
others.]
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Take advantage of other people’s experience!
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If you don’t know, someone else does. If you want to go
somewhere and achieve something, somebody already has.
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Find out who knows what you need to know.
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If someone else took 15 years to achieve what it is that you
are hoping to achieve, then the essential aspects of that
hard-won experience are available to you, in whatever form
suits you best.
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Write a letter. Make a phone call. Go talk to them. Meet
privately with teachers, professors and coaches outside your
normal sphere. Write to professionals in your field of interest;
some of them will surprise you andd write back.
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Read the newspaper articles, magazines and newsletters that
have something in them about what you need to know; write
to publishers and ask for sample copies, and about student
rates. Spend time at public or college libraries at least once a
week. Get lost in the bookstore. Attend a class, seminar or
symposium. Listen to audiotapes,. Watch videos.
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Use your imagination and creativity, and mentally project
yourself into the experiences that you are learning about.
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Zen and The Art of Making a Living: A Practical Guide to Creative
Career Design, Laurence G. Boldt, Arkana/Penguin Books, 1993.
[Thick, thorough, penetrating, demanding: it will help you work
through the issues of what your mission in life is, where to apply
your talents, and how to accomplish the dreams and visions you
have for your life in the world.]
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A good mentor!
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A good mentor will show you and tell you about what it is
that he does. Simply by being in the presence of this
individual, you will get a richer feel, through your
subconsciousness, about pertinent issues, problems,
attitudes and responses, along with a host of other shades
and nuances of the work that he does. Through observation
and osmosis, imitation and modeling, you will move closer to
mastery. A good mentor will provide you with challenging
assignments, give you access to key contacts, hope you set
goals, write letters of recommendation, and point out other
avenues that you may wish to explore. A good mentor
provides not only information that understanding, but also
caring and concern.
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How To Be, Do, or Have Anything: A Practical Guide to Creative
Empowerment, Laurence G. Boldt, Ten Speed Press, Berkeley, CA
2001.
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See also “Career Explosion: Reinvent Yourself in 30 Days”, Gary
Joseph Grabow, Berkley Books, New York 2000.
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No one has ever given you an opportunity?
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Has it occurred to you that you have the ability to
create opportunity for yourself (and others…)?
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““Will you help me?” Are the only words you need to
say; someone will help you.”
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-- Tom Harkin, founder of Domino’s pizza
I need your help!
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Say it. Out loud. Say “I need your_________” [ advice,
assistance, support, recommendations, encouragement, direction,
guidance, ideas, suggestions].
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You are virtually surrounded by people who are ready and willing
to help you. Often you have to look for these people, and
sometimes you have to ask them several times. While there are
people who will not give you the time of day, there are others
who would be delighted and thrilled to help you. But, by and
large, if you are working hard, if you’re energized and
enthusiastic, if you have a clearly identified talent or visible
passion for something, and if you ask, people will respond to you.
Find yourself your own Forrester.
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Be alert to opportunities that may come your way. Ask for what
you need. Express appreciation for the help that you receive. Let
these people know that they are important to you and that you
value their assistance and contribution. Protect those people who
contribute to you by not abusing their confidence and trust.
Follow-up on their leads in advice; if you take action, they will
likely help you again; if you do nothing, they will not contribute
their time and energy again.
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If you develop a relationship with an individual who is going to
help you, make sure the you take the time to see that person in
ways that are related to things other than you, your needs, and
your topics. Those people were willing to help youths have their
own personality, a family, work, hobbies, a spirit, and their own
goals and aspirations; recognize and respond to what’s going on
in their world, and give something of yourself back. And don’t
forget to share which you get with others. Pay it forward.
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Zen and The Art of Making a Living: A Practical Guide to Creative
Career Design, Laurence G. Boldt, Arkana/Penguin Books, 1993.
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“Don’t expect mentors to show up just one day. Instead
of waiting for someone to take you under their wing, go
out there and find a good wing to climb under.”
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Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy’s
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Before we start teaching youth to fish for mentors
on any sort of mass scale, it is important to stop
the ponds.
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Who is standing by our youth?
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Unfortunately, many youth do not readily find older, supportive
adults beyond the boundaries of their own household, and turn
elsewhere for a sense of identity, purpose and belonging.… In
Western societies, parents are considered solely responsible for
their children; the involvement of other adults is often met with
suspicion and discomfort….Adolescents’ chances of forming ties
with mentors are, to a large extent, a function of the
encouragement and opportunities that their parents provide.
Rather than acting as a substitute for intimacy and
communication with parents, mentoring appears to produce
positive effects that reverberate back into the family.
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Mentors can influence their protégés’ develop in 3 important
ways:
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by enhancing social skills and emotional well-being;
by improving cognitive skills through dialogue and listening;
by serving as a role model and advocate.
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Mentors can positively influence adolescents’ relationships. By
acting as a sounding board and providing a model for effective
communications, mentors can help adolescents better
understand, more clearly express, and more effectively control
both their positive and negative emotions. When mentors
function in this way as a “social mirror”, adolescents than my
project themselves into the role of their mentors, and appraise
situations in themselves from their mentors’ standpoint.
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Even when mentors did not serve as direct models, they can be
influential in helping adolescents focus on a brighter future. They
can advocate on behalf of their protégés, opening doors to new
opportunities and helping them establish and make use of
connections in the community.
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Close-up confiding in student-teacher relationships tend to be
more the exception than the rule. Students may develop one or
two important ties with certain teachers over the course of their
schooling, but they did not perceive their typical teacher
relationships as particularly close or meaningful. Teachers are
saddled with dense curricular demands that leave little room for
the sorts of conversations and activities that typically draw them
closer to their students. Students in schools cannot thrive if care
is confined to private, occasional moments: a teacher or a
principal who stops because she notices a child interiors; a coach
available after school; a friend who will listen at lunch.
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In order to successfully pass through adolescence, youth needs
“access to safe places, challenging experiences, and caring people
on a daily basis.”
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Our challenge is, first, to not underestimate the complexities of
mentoring relationships and, second, to better understand and
promote the conditions under which they are most likely to
flourish.
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Stand by Me: The Risks and Rewards of Mentoring Today’s Youth,
Jean Rhodes, Harvard University Press, Cambridge, 2002.
[Mentoring theory based on a decade of research by a UMass/
Boston associate professor of psychology.]
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Talent doesn’t have to shine from the outset.
Most people will perform if given a chance
and a few role models.
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What Should I Do with My Life?: The True Story of People Who
Answered the Ultimate Question, Po Bronson, Ballantine Books
2005.
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Don’t keep knocking on doors that don’t open to you.
You will only get scraped knuckles and a chilled and shadowed
spirit ....
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I insisted on believing that others would “see the light” and cheer
me on and my chosen pursuits. I reasoned that if I related my
story better, or chose better words, that they get it. People close
to us may lack the therapeutic instinct to give you the space,
encouragement and support you need. Your choices may frighten
them or threaten them. While you are shooting for the moon,
they are more focused on the pressing issues from within their
own elective incarceration.
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Passion is not freely available in everyone else’s world. They
cannot see the values you hold so dearly because they think you
are discarding theirs. Even well-meaning people who say wellmeaning things may not recognize the light within you.
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Seek your support from people on the same type of path is you;
seek her guidance from those who traveled equally unique and
difficult paths.
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This time I dance! Trusting the journey of creating the work you
love, Tama Kieves, Awakening Artistry Press, Denver 2002
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Gaining the supporting cooperation of others!
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Few worthwhile goals can be achieved without the aid and
support of others. Whether it’s one person or an
organization, you are probably going to need somebody’s
cooperation to make your dreams come true. As you seek the
support, you encounter reluctance and resistance that you
will need to learn to recognize, avoid, turn aside, or
overcome.
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The first step to overcoming resistance is to be aware that it
exists. Some people are going to be indifferent, or too caught
up in their own lives to care one way or another about your
goals. You may also encounter those who deliberately, or
more often, unconsciously block your progress. Learn to
differentiate between those who can and want to support you
and simply need to be convinced, and those who are
incapable of providing real support or who don’t have your
best interests at heart.
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Keep in mind that, as a rule, people can only wish for others
what they would be willing to receive for themselves. Happy
people are much more likely to support your happiness than
unhappy people effective people are more likely to support
your effectiveness than ineffective people people live goals of
their own are more likely to support you in achieving yours.
Creatively expressive people who express their own creativity
are more inclined to support you in expressing yours.
Associate with those people who can help you achieve your
goals, and avoid as much as possible (without creating
further problems and obstacles), those whose resistance
tends to slow your progress.
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There are times when even those closest to you may resist
your growth. This does not mean that they don’t love you or
support you. It simply means that people resist change,
especially change they themselves have not initiated. When
you take a step in personal growth, those who have a stake
in relating to you in old, limiting or habitual ways may feel
threatened. Becoming aware of this resistance and accepting
it as natural helps you to adopt an effective approach for
overcoming it. It will enable you to avoid the two major
pitfalls in dealing with resistance from those you love. They’ll
become angry at them for “holding you back”; it will only
divert energy away from the pursuit of your goals and stiffen
their resistance. Don’t yield to their resistance and abandon
your goals; it will rob you of the opportunity and spawn
resentment that will damage your relationship in the long
run.
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The best approach is to remain calm, flexible and
determined. Listen to the other party’s concerns and take
them seriously. Let them know that you want their support.
Let them know that you are committed to creating a solution
that works for everyone involved. Be flexible in terms of how
your goals can be accomplished, but don’t waver in your
determination. Once your loved ones realize the depth of
your commitment and that you are not to be deterred, the
emphasis will shift away from emotional resistance to a
consideration of the practical issues involved.
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Discuss your goals with those you can count on to help you
achieve them. It’s best to operate on a “need to know” basis
with people whose low self-esteem prevents them from being
fully supportive. In this case, keep your dreams, goals and
plans to yourself. Find other things to talk with them about.
Discuss your goals only after you have completed them or
wall along in the process. Questions need not be answered
directly. Reveal what you want, when you want, to whom you
want; this will protect you and your ideas from the doubt,
fear, jealousy and even outright hostility of others. You will
avoid creating unnecessary resistance and save yourself
difficulties, pain and heartbreak.
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While awareness of resistance is an asset, fearing it or using
it as an excuse for inaction is a liability. Don’t give those who
deliberately or subconsciously resist your success any more
time or attention than they deserve. You have the power to
concentrate and focus–will give it away.
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The point isn’t that you should never talk to strangers about
your goals. On the contrary, it will be essential that you do
so. What is important is that you think before you speak. Ask
yourself: “Is talking about my goals to these people at this
time going to help me achieve them?
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How To Be, Do, or Have Anything: A Practical Guide to Creative
Empowerment, Laurence G. Boldt, Ten Speed Press, Berkeley, CA
2001.
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Beliefs rule outcomes, so wise coaches carefully
choose what they say to their charges. Wise athletes
are equally selective about what they tell themselves.
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Mind Over Water: Lessons on Life from the Art of Rowing, Craig
Lambert, Houghton Mifflin, New York, 1998. [Superlative writing.]
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One of the basic strategies of the coach is to plant, in
the students minds, goals that here she would never
of striven for on their own.
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Sadaharu Oh: A Zen Way of Baseball, Sadaharu Oh and David
Faulkner, Times Books, New York, 1984. [Insights into the mind/
body training of the greatest home run hitter in the history of the
game.]
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The main ingredient in coaching
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Experience can only remind us of what we already know. The
coach can say “you already know… I’m here only to remind
you.” The main ingredient in coaching is simply permission.
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Once people find they are in a safe place, the way may be
open to a fresh new world of perception and being. Simply by
considering possibilities commonly ignored or covertly
forbidden by our culture, we find ourselves in a far more
fascinating universe. We realize that our world is “awesome,
mysterious and unfathomable”, and their life is filled to the
brim, and that is altogether too short.
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The Ultimate Athlete: Revisioning Sports, Physical Education and
The Body, by George Leonard, Viking, NY 1974.
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The qualities of an ideal coach
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The role of the coach might include those of a problem solver,
a teacher, an advisor, and instructor or even an expert, but
each of these approaches have potential pitfalls for the
individual being coached. When the coach is a sounding
board, a facilitator, a counselor, and someone who raises the
awareness of the individual being coached, then the
individual being coached is free to move beyond.
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The qualities of an ideal coach would include patience,
detachment, a supportive attitude, interest, good listening
skills, as well as high levels of perception, awareness, selfawareness, attentiveness and retention. Technical expertise,
knowledge, experience, credibility and authority may or may
not be beneficial, and should be withheld or used judiciously.
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Coaching for Performance: A Practical Guide to Growing Your Own
Skills, John Whitmore, Pfeiffer and Company, 1994. [The author is
the co-founder of The Inner Game Ltd., one company among
many that have taken the lessons from winning athletes into the
world of business.]
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The words educate and educe stem from the same word
root: the Latin educere, to lead forth. Education does not
install knowledge in the brain; rather, it evokes potentials
that exist in the student, developing innate talents and
abilities. The coach does not impose goals, but serves as
an external agent that enables the team to realize the
ambitions they are ready hold. The coach leads the
athlete forth.
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Mind Over Water: Lessons on Life from the Art of Rowing, Craig
Lambert, Houghton Mifflin, New York, 1998.
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Creativity is in all of us. If education means “to lead out of”…,
that it is the primary task of school to lead creativity out of
every child. It is not the task of school to tell youngsters that
they can’t draw or can’t sign or can dance. Technique and
awareness of the unique gifts at students have come later.
First is to instill the confidence, trust, and ultimately the
courage it will take every human being to live with chaos and
to transform it, to live with creativity and to honor it. If
education fails at this, it fails of its most important task. Why
then are educational models not built on awakening in the
listening that which is most human human out of us? Why
isn’t all education an education in creativity? An education in
the essence of being human?
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Creativity: Where the Divine and the Human Meet, Matthew Fox,
Tarcher/Putnam, New York 2002.
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The teacher has nothing to do with the talent;
the teacher only allows that talent to be better
expressed.
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Juilliard, an American Masters production on PBS.
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The role of the coach!
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Even with your best efforts in mastering concepts and skills,
you still need a good coach. It is conceivably possible to
teach yourself to excel at something without one, but it is not
likely, and you probably won’t reach your goal as fast. Good
coaching increases the general quality of performance in
most people because it is difficult to see what you’re doing
while you’re doing it. It is difficult to combat your own
internal interferences all by yourself.
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A coach promotes improved performance by facilitating the
learning process. He or she may not need to do much
teaching, but must know how to help learning. Many teachers
approach teaching thinking that they’re the one who knows,
and the student is the one who doesn’t know. Learning is
more than just an exchange of information. Information is
cheap and powerful [just look around here and elsewhere on
the Internet], but insight is precious. There is value in being
guided with insight through an experience in which you grasp
your own insight.
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The teacher that has the attitude that he knows and you
don’t will be quick to judge, to try to change you, to try to
prove himself to you, and quick to take credit for what you
learn. Sounds like Self One, doesn’t it?
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The best coach is one who, from the depths of his or her
experience, trusts yourself … Perhaps even more than you
do. The best coach is one who, from his greater experience,
can intuitively see where you are in your own development
and help you find the best place to focus your attention. The
best teacher helps you discover your own learning goals, not
his.
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Good teaching is always nonjudgmental, trusts the human
potential, as is clear about objectives, and is unobtrusive.
These are all basic self to characteristics.
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When teaching is an ego trip, no matter how correct
information may be, the teacher will inject obstacles into the
learning process that inevitably will be transferred to
problems and performance.
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The Inner Game of Golf (revised edition), W. Timothy Gallwey,
Random House, 1998. [One of a series of Inner Game books...]
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The teacher can demand a standard, but there must
always be room for the individual.
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Juilliard, an American Masters production on PBS.
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Look at all the coaches who are in the Hall of Fame….;
With these guys, it’s not about hype, or selfpromotion, or fancy clothes. Larry infuses light, hope,
exuberance and spirit, and the Indiana Pacers were
broken in spirit before Larry got there.
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Bill Walton, on Larry Bird,
by Peter May, Boston Globe, October 4, 1998
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Strategies for gaining cooperation!
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When you have found someone who you think will be
supportive, your strategy now is to recognize that there is a
spectrum of confidence that an individual will exhibit toward
you, or trust that you can exhibit toward them. You’re going
to have to trust someone and so you will have to, in Boldt’s
words, “take their trust temperature”.
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People who are cold to you will have little confidence; there
will be little mutual trust. Your objective is to melt the ice by
smiling, being warm and friendly. Search for agreement with
people who are called to your vision for yourself by listening,
and by avoiding argument. Draw them out. Listen to them to
look for areas of agreement and clues as to how you might
help them warm up more or gain their cooperation.
How might you make them warm up more or gain their
cooperation? Discuss the areas where there is a high
likelihood for agreement first; get some yeses on the board.
Prepare for your encounters by thinking through in advance
what you and the other person will likely agree on. When
you’re asking for the support and understanding of others,
make sure that it is at any time that is convenient for them.
Don’t be pushy; you can actually create resistance in people
who might otherwise be favorably disposed to help you by
trying too hard to convince them. Then, apply your creative
imagination to the task of helping them see you and your
ideas in the light of the way you see things.
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People who are cool to you are those with whom there is
potential mutual confidence and trust. Warm them up. Paint
pictures they can relate to. Build bridges of understanding.
Appeal to their interests. What are their problems, concerns,
fears, interests, goals and aspirations? Think about this, and
find out, and then target your communications accordingly.
Link what your audience already knows, likes and values to
your message. Use real sincerity and genuine interest; avoid
the sense that you will have to impress them. Speak in
simple language that your audience will understand. Use
concrete images, vivid mental pictures, symbols, metaphors
and stories that will make your ideas, goals and plans come
alive in the minds of your audience.
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People who are warm to you have a conditional level of
confidence and trust. Fire them up. Tell them that you want
their support; provide them with evidence for why they
should. Demonstrate credibility. Follow-through. Don’t make
promises or commitments you can keep; keep the ones you
make. Most people who are in the warm category will think
more highly of you when you share with them what you have
to offer without making them work to get it out of you. Show
them how your idea benefits them. Show them that you
understand their needs, desires and interests. The best way
to get what you want is by helping others get what they
want. Make a list of what they want, and some ideas on how
you can help them get them, and then follow through. Try
this a few times; it will become second nature. Get their
input and agreement. When people play a part in making
decisions, they become more emotionally involved in making
sure they get accomplished. Get people involved in
brainstorming, followed by discussion. It will take more time
and energy, but the dividends will be bigger. Get ideas,
energy, creativity and enthusiasm from others; you will move
you farther faster.
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People who are hot have total confidence in you and trust
you unconditionally. Maintain their flame. Show them that
you value their trust. Let them know, in creative and frequent
ways, that you appreciate them, not only for their efforts and
performance, or for what is special about them. Be generous
with your praise when it is due. Give thanks to those whose
support has been, or can be, significant keys to your
success. Beyond time. Be prompt in communicating with
them. Send cards, gifts and momentous. Will they remember
you the next time you ask for help?
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Show empathy; consider their point of view. Earn their trust,
and keep it. They’re like a water skier hopping waves at the
back of your boat; you have to show them that you’re
looking out for them. You want them to go out again, won’t
you? Be clear and direct with them. Eliminate potential
conflict or confusion by spelling out exactly what you want
and expect. Done expect them to read your mind.
!
Move up the scale where possible. Slow down or back off
when when you sense you are moving too far too fast, and
go back one step and reestablish a connection or rapport
again before you move up. Whenever you are going to
communicate complex ideas or address issues that have
emotional charge for you or them, jot your thoughts down on
paper first, and develop the strategy beforehand. Use these
tips in your phone, letter and face-to-face communications
with the people in the world.
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How To Be, Do, or Have Anything: A Practical Guide to Creative
Empowerment, Laurence G. Boldt, Ten Speed Press, Berkeley, CA
2001.
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Exercises to help you gain support from others!
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Number 1) Sit down with four colored pens and a large,
separate, private notebook. List all the important people in your
life, in your past, in your present environment, and in your shortterm future, including friends, family, loved ones, bosses,
coworkers, teammates, whomever. Leave lots of space next to
each name. Put down as many as you can think of. [This should
include groups of people to which you belong, have similar
interests, or have a potential impact on your goals.] Put them in
the appropriate “trust temperature” category of hot, warm, cool
and cold.
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Number 2) Pick 3 or 4 people from the hot category who know
you best. Ask them, in a convenient and appropriate way, to
describe your strengths, weaknesses and how/where they feel
you can grow. Write down and consider what you learn.
!
Number 3) Go back to the list you made. Devise a simple
strategy for as many of these people as you can do will help you
move them up one level on the trust scale, or at least reinforce
the existing level of trust. Start at the hot end of the scale, and
begin to implement that strategy in small ways while you begin to
work on exercise number 4.
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Number 4) List all of the people, groups and environments you
can think of that will challenge you to be your best. List ways that
you can arrange to put yourself “in front of” these challenging
people or environments. This might include: making a phone call;
writing a note or letter; joining a group; attending a meeting,
seminar or camp; arranging a meeting; it’s making a
presentation. If you are stuck for ideas, go back and talk to the
people in your hot group and ask for theirs.
!
Number 5) Go back to the list you made. Focus on those, from
any category, who support you think is essential for you to meet
your goal. [This might include people in your future whom you
have not yet met.] Put one name each on a new separate page,
and record what it is precisely that you need from them. Pick
from one or more of the following twelve categories: time; effort;
money; skills; understanding; knowledge; encouragement;
agreement; influence; permission; advice; mediation.
!
Number 6) Using these secondary pages of those people and
organizations on your essential support team and the types of
support that you will need, begin to develop a strategy. Ask
yourself: a) How will I approach this person or group? B) What
will I offer in return for their support? C) How can I establish
rapport and a feeling of mutual interest? D) How can I build
bridges of understanding? E) How can I show them how they will
benefit? (What will their major objections or resistance be, and
what’s my response?)
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Number 7) Periodically update and reviewed this workbook. Add
new people and organizations as you encounter them. Keep the
hot people hot. Work on making the warm people hot. Put in the
little energy to moving the cool people to the warm category.
And, if the opportunity falls in your lap, make cold people feel
cool.
!
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How To Be, Do, or Have Anything: A Practical Guide to Creative
Empowerment, Laurence G. Boldt, Ten Speed Press, Berkeley, CA 2001.
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See also
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How to Find the Work You Love, Laurence G. Boldt
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Zen and the Art of Making a Living: A Practical Guide to Creative
Career Design [Paperback], Laurence G. Boldt