Dirty talk that Drives men wilD

These sexy
words will
make his
ears burn.
talk that
men wild
130 Cosmopolitan / June 2011 COSMOPOLITAN.COM
Chris Clinton
Guys Uncensored
1. “The alarm clock sounded,
and she hit the snooze button.
Then she rolled on top of me and
said, ‘We’ve got nine minutes.
Let’s do this.’ ”
—Tom, 26
2. “She looked me up and down
and asked, ‘So, why are your
clothes still on?’ ”
—Andy, 24
3. “A few times, just before I cli-
how it’s supposed to feel.’ Emphasis on exactly.” —Peter, 37
13. “ ‘You’re nasty, and I love it!’ ”
—Juan, 30
14. “She wanted me to dominate her and kept saying ‘Yes,
sir.’ It got me so hot.” 4. “I’d had a long day. She rubbed
5. “She grabbed my face with
both hands and said, ‘Oh my
god, I just came…and I think it’s
going to happen again!’ Hottest
thing ever.”
—Darrel, 27
6. “I love when a girl gives me
little pointers, like ‘To the right’
or ‘Go slower.’ It shows that
she’s comfortable with me, it
gives me confidence that I’m
doing exactly what she wants,
and I feel free to give her direction as well.”
—Charlie, 24
7. “While we were having sex for
By Carolyn Kylstra
12. “She said, ‘That’s exactly
maxed, my ex would say, ‘You
just got bigger.’ I loved it because
it showed that she was really into
it and could feel everything that
was going on.”
—Mike, 27
my shoulders and then whispered:
‘Relax. Lie on your back. Let me
take care of you.’ ”
—John, 27
We asked men
to share the
most crotchtingling
comments a
woman has
ever whispered,
moaned, or
screamed in
the heat of the
11. “She told me I was huge…
and that she wanted me inside
her right now.”
—Chris, 18
an extended period of time, she
said, ‘I’m going to pass out, I
can’t take it!’ ”
—Joe, 34
8. “Sometimes, all I need is to
hear a woman say my name.” —Cal, 26
9. “A few years ago, I was in a
deeply meaningful relationship.
One time when we were in the
middle of having sex, she looked
up at me and whispered, ‘I love
you, I love you, I love you.’ That
was all it took to take the sex
to the next level—it was a type
of passion I’d never felt before
or since.”
—Shea, 24
10. “Very softly, she said, ‘Do
me.’ She was a very shy and conservative woman, and the shock
value made it incredibly sexy.”
—Ashton, 28
—Brandyn, 29
15. “ ‘How about you tie me up?’ ”
—Taylor, 23
16. “I tried something new with
my hand, and afterward, she
said, ‘Holy crap, I’ve never had
an orgasm from that before.’ ” —Darrel, 26
17. “I dated a girl from Sweden
for a year or so. I had no idea
what she was saying half the
time during sex, but the fact
that it was in Swedish made it
very sexy.” —Alex, 31
18. “The hottest, sexiest thing
a woman can say to me has always been ‘I’m gonna come.’ It
lets me know that I’m takin’ care
of business.” —Ray, 37
19. “The sexiest kind of talk isn’t
too complicated or dirty. Sometimes, simple is best. If I wanted
crazy-dirty talk, I’d just watch
porn.” —Eric, 31
20. “I asked my girlfriend what
our plans were for later that evening. She said, ‘Well, I’m going
to rip off your clothes, use your
body like a jungle gym, and ride
you like a cowgirl!’ I was so
turned on that I had a hard time
focusing at work that day.”
—Eli, 27
21. “ ‘Ready for round three?’ ” —Zack, 27
22. “She asked, ‘What do you
want to do?’ The thing that made
it so incredibly hot was that she
said it completely eagerly and
enthusiastically.” —James, 31
June 2011 / Cosmopolitan
24. “ ‘I’ve never felt so comfortable and at ease with someone.’ ”
—Gene, 24
28. “ ‘Harder! Harder!’ ”
—Ari, 26
29. “She cooked me dinner,
and it was delicious. Then she
leaned over and whispered in my
ear, ‘For dessert, you’re going
to eat my cake.’ ” —Derrick, 27
stairs.’ She replied, ‘I don’t care,
just keep going.’” —Jarrod, 27
42. “She said, ‘I want to make
33. “The hottest thing a woman
has ever said to me in bed is
‘Put it in.’ I used to tease my
ex-girlfriend—I would pretend
like I was about to penetrate her
and then I would pull away, and
she’d go absolutely crazy. I
loved when she begged for it.”
—Ben, 19
43. “She said ‘I need you’ at a
point where there was only one
thing that she could be talking
about needing.” —Kent, 26
34. “I was going down on
her, and she said, ‘Use your
fingers too.’ ” —Randy, 31
35. “She got naked and told
me, ‘This is yours.’ ” —Rudy, 28
36. “I was about to lose my vir-
We love it when
the guys share
naughty details.
‘‘After we
had sex, she
said, ‘Women
would pay
you for that!’”
26. “Following a night out, we
went back to her place, and she
didn’t hold anything back.
She brought out her vibrator
and told me exactly how she
wanted it. It was the best sex
I’ve ever had.” —Dane, 23
27. “It was the first time I’d
ever gone down on a woman.
When I explained this to her, she
did a double-take and said,
‘Well, if that’s how you do it the
first time, I can’t wait to find out
what the second time is like!’ ” —John, 32
—Dan, 31
ginity to a more experienced
woman. She gave me a game
plan: ‘First, you’re going to go
down on me. Then we’re going to
do it in missionary position.’ It
was very clinical-sounding, but it
really turned me on and helped
me relax.”
—Tim, 31
37. “I was hooking up with a girl
for the first time and wondering
if we were going to have sex.
Then she grabbed my penis and
said, ‘I want this inside me.’ I almost melted—it was dirty and
exactly what I wanted to hear.”
—Sam, 27
38. “Compliments are nice and
appreciated, but the biggest
turn-on is hearing her shout ‘Yes,
yes, yes!’ It’s like applause.” —Steve, 28
you feel good.’ ”
—Andy, 24
44. “ ‘Baby, you make me so
wet just being around you. It
drives me crazy!’ ” —Justin, 29
45. “I was spooning with a new
lover, slowly caressing her body
and kissing her neck. She whispered, ‘If you keep doing that,
I’m going to have to have my way
with you.’ ” —Sean, 28
46. “A girl I used to sleep with
in college once told me that her
legs were shaking right after sex
and that when she tried to get
up, she could barely walk.” —Dale, 27
47. “ ‘I’ve never been f---ed like
that before.’ That made me feel
like she’d never forget me.” —Todd, 38
48. “My girl and I had been
experimenting with role-playing
during sex, but it hadn’t gone
very far. Then she shocked me
one night by saying this: ‘Unfortunately, the lusty librarian is out
today, and if that’s a problem,
you’ll just have to take it up with
the nymphomaniac nurse.’ ”
—-Mike, 26
49. “My girl raves about my
penis—she says it fits her
—Joseph, 19
30. “My girlfriend texted me
39. “ ‘I think you’re one of the
few good guys left.’ I don’t normally hear a lot of compliments
like that.”
—Alex, 25
31. “She said, ‘That orgasm
40. “I went down on a new girlfriend. Afterward, she pulled me
up to her face, kissed me, and
said, ‘You are amazing at that.’ ”
—Josh, 22
The Worst Words
to Come Out
of Her Mouth
41. “I love dirty talk, but the sexi-
Not all pillow talk is
dirty in a good way.
Eight men dish on
some real bonerkilling experiences.
from the other room: ‘I’m naked
in bed and waiting for you.’ She
didn’t have to tell me twice!” —Robert, 29
was so intense, my eyes rolled
so far back into my head that I
could see my insides!’”
—Jim, 28
32. “While we were having sex
on the second floor of a bar in
New York City, I said, ‘I think
someone is coming up the
132 Cosmopolitan / June 2011 est thing a woman can say to me
in bed is telling me what she wants
or likes. I don’t care if it’s ‘Pull my
hair,’ ‘Let me taste you,’ ‘Do me
harder,’ or ‘Do a cartwheel.’ It just
makes everything better to know
what she likes.”
—Justin, 31
Chris Clinton
23. “This turned me on and
made me laugh at the same
time: ‘Okay, now bend me over
and say ahhh!’ ”
—Jason, 27
50. “She held my hand against
her body and asked, ‘Do you feel
how turned on I am?’ ”—Scott, 29
stimulation, and she said, ‘You
have the most magical fingers.’ ”
51. “The morning after I hooked
59. “After sex, she turned to me
52. “ ‘You wore me out!’ ”
and jokingly whispered, ‘Did we
just experience an earthquake?!’ ”
—Stephen, 21
—Derrick, 29
like you’re scraping the back of
my brain!’—a very encouraging
and funny way to tell me I was wellendowed. I loved it.” —Pete, 33
62. “She was lying on top of me,
we’d both had crazy orgasms, and
we were gasping for breath. She
held up her hand for a high five and
said, ‘Good game.’ ” —Max, 27
—Casey, 34
54. “After a long sex romp, she
looked into my eyes and said
‘Thank you.’ I knew that I had
satisfied her and she appreciated my efforts.”
—Dan, 28
63. “My phone rang, and when
I picked up, she said she was
fantasizing about me while
touching herself.” —Eric, 31
55. “ ‘I want you so bad, I can’t
64. “My high school crush and I
were virgins, and we decided to
have sex. I asked if she was sure.
She said one word: ‘Absolutely.’ ”
see straight.’ ” —Gabe, 24
56. “She made me breakfast in
the morning. She said ‘Good
morning, babe’ and gave me two
egg-and-cheese breakfast sandwiches. I had a boner from here
to Africa.” —Jesse, 27
looks so hot during sex.’ I spend
a lot of time at the gym, so this
was awesome to hear.”
—Frank, 29
—Zack, 22
“Right after I hooked up
with a girl, she turned to
me and said, ‘Wow, I didn’t
think you’d be better than
your brother!’ I had no
idea she’d hooked up with
my brother before…and I
—Paul, 20
65. “We were joking around, and
I was trying to impress her. She
rolled her eyes and said, ‘Okay,
okay. You’re hilarious and charming. Now take off your pants.’ ”
57. “My girl told me, ‘Your body
“During sex with what I
thought was a one-night
stand, she said, ‘I bet we’d
have beautiful babies.’ ”
—Joseph, 27
61. “A girl once said to me, ‘It’s
wife and I had had sex—­either the
kids were around or we were busy.
Well, we finally got some time
alone…and out of nowhere, she
straddled me, beat her chest, and
made the Tarzan call. Sounds
nutty, but it was incredibly hot.”
—Bill, 32
60. “ ‘You feel so good inside me.’ ”
53. “It had been a while since my
says ‘Kiss me.’
It’s tender and
really hot at the
same time.”
—Travis, 24
up with a woman who I thought
was way out of my league, she
left me a note that read, ‘I must
see you again.’ That made me
feel awesome.” —Sammy, 35
‘‘I always
love when a girl
58. “I got her off with manual
—Drew, 26
66. “ ‘Baby, that’s the spot!’ ” —Joel, 22
didn’t really want to know
how I compared either!”
—Joe, 25
“The worst was when she
asked, with disappointment,
‘You’re done ­already?’ ”
—Tony, 25
“She looked deep into my
eyes and said, ‘Oh, by
the way…I was a virgin.’ ”
—David, 28
68. “My girlfriend shouted out,
‘F--- me harder!’ She never uses
the F word, so that instantly sent
me over the edge.” —Chris, 36
73. “She cupped my balls in her
hands and said, ‘God, I love
these things.’ It was weirdly hot.”
69. “For me, too much talking
during sex is a turn-off. That
said, though, spontaneous and
unexpected phrases can be a
turn-on—like ‘Strip now,’ ‘Take
off your clothes’ and ‘Lick me.’ ”
74. “ Whatever you’re doing down
there, don’t stop!’ ”
—Frank, 21
—Noah, 19
—Tim, 23
75. “A girl I’d been casually sleeping with went on a date with another guy…and then came to my
bed. She said, ‘All I could think
about was coming back and being
with you.’ Wow.”
—Marc, 31
71. “We were role-playing: I was
76. “She took one look at my
—Marco, 35
70. “ ‘Pull my hair.’ ” the teacher, and she was the student. She had been sent to ‘detention,’ and I was scolding her and
asking myself out loud what I
should do with her. She said, ‘I
think I deserve a spanking.’ ”
—Zack, 22
72. “The girl I was sleeping with
said she’d never had an orgasm
before. So when she screamed
out, ‘It’s finally happening! Keep
going! Keep going!’ I felt like a
sex god.”
—Steven, 24
“I hate when women ask
me to choke them. I’m
all for a little kink, but that’s
too much.”
—Sam, 22
“This one completely
threw off my game: ‘Take
me to your leader, Mr.
Alien Spaceman.’ ” —A.J., 22
“She was a very new girlfriend, and she said, ‘I love
you, I love you, I love you’
erection and exclaimed, ‘Lucky
me!’ ” —David, 28
77. “I’d been dating a girl for a
while, but we hadn’t had sex yet. We
were making out, and she was on
top of me. Suddenly, she stopped,
looked me in the eye, and said, ‘I’m
ready.’ The way she said it and
looked at me, I knew the night
would be amazing.”
—Jake, 23
78. “ ‘Should we invite her to
join us?’ ” —David, 30
while climaxing. When I
didn’t say anything back,
she said, ‘Where is this relationship going, Chris?’ It was
our second date! ” —Chris, 30
“I was in college and had a
hard time lasting during
sex. One time, my girlfriend
told me to keep going, and
I said I was going to come…
and she shouted, ‘Think of
your mother!’ ”
—Dave, 28
June 2011 / Cosmopolitan