December 2012 INSIDEOUTSIDE “I was struggling to buy food for my children and needed money”. I arrived at the airport in Melbourne and Immigration stopped me in Customs. They asked if I was carrying anything illegal on my body and I said “no”. Then they asked if I was carrying any illegal substances inside my body and I said “yes”, because I was so afraid. They immediately took me to the hospital to have my body x-rayed. I told them I was three months pregnant. The x-ray revealed that I had many pellets of heroin inside my body. After being admitted to the hospital they gave me medicine to make my body pass the pellets. Once they had all the pellets I was taken to the custody centre where I stayed for four nights. It was very bad. I felt very depressed and cried all day. I was transferred to DPFC. I thought that place at Deer Park would be much worse than the custody centre, but am happy to be here. I met Lyndel from PNM who supported and cared about me. When I went to the Yarra Unit (Remand), I met another prisoner from my country and she helped me by giving me food, soap and shampoo. Then I moved to the Mother and Baby Unit where I quickly settled and felt happy. My baby grew and grew. I worked hard in the prison kitchen for 5 months to earn some money so I could call my family overseas. I worked more hours than I needed to. In July, just before birthing my baby, I went to the County Court. I was sentenced to 14 months. I had already served many months which gave me 9 month to go. I was so relieved when the judge understood the reason for my crime. I was struggling to buy food for my children and needed money. My ex husband was sick and I was alone and the cost of living in my country is very high. Lyndel supported me at court because I had nobody to care about me in Australia. I could have had a big sentence, but the judge understood me. Again I asked Lyndel to help me and be with me in the hospital when I birthed my baby. After four days in hospital I finally birthed my baby girl. Lyndel was beside me holding my hand. I feel she is like my mother who used to care for me when I struggled and had pain. My mother already passed away 3 years ago because of cancer. I was so happy Lyndel cut the cord when the midwife asked her. I was so happy at that moment – a sweet memory for me. Now I’m busy with my baby which makes time go fast. Recently, the government of Australia gave me a chance to stay here. They offered me to apply for a permanent protection visa because they are scared for my life and my baby if I go home. I’m so happy and hope I can live here and make myself have a good life. I so appreciate how kind the government of Australia is to me. In my country I have four children with my first husband, three boys and one girl. He takes all my children, but I’m scared because he is sick with Schizophrenia. I don’t think he can care for them. He took them from my father last month and I’m so sad to hear that. If I have a chance I will bring them here to live with me. Immigration says I can apply to bring them after several years. I must need to be patient. Here in Australia there are many opportunities, even in prison. I can mix with other prisoners and cook my own food and keep my baby with me. The other women are so kind to me. Sometime we are like a family who live together in one unit. In my room in jail I have a bed, a TV, a cot for my baby and a pram. I have nappies and a change table. They give me baby clothes because I have no friends or family and have no finances. The Mother and Baby worker helps me. I want to thank them all so much. They are all lovely to me. Demi A note from the CEO Welcome to the final edition of ‘Inside Outside’ for 2012. Having just celebrated my grandson’s 2nd Birthday, it reminded me of the joy of sharing special times with family. As we approach Christmas, it’s important to be mindful of the fact that there are many people who won’t have the opportunity to be with loved ones at such a significant time. By supporting PNM with a donation to our Christmas Appeal, you’ll be helping to provide services which make a real difference to people’s lives: presents for children, transport of children to visit their mums, sending kids to camp, basics like food and clothing, practical support for struggling families and emotional support for those who have no-one to turn to. When you’re thinking about the gifts you plan to give this Christmas, please think about a gift to the PNM Christmas Appeal. Sadly, this Christmas Australians will spend over $750 million on unwanted presents. That’s an amazing statistic. It means we’re spending millions every year buying things for people who don’t actually want or need those things. Christmas is most truly Christmas when we celebrate it by giving the light of love to those who need it most – Ruth Carter. During December, PNM will spend time helping a number of women and their families and you can help. We wish you every happiness for the Christmas season. Blessings, Deb Redford tough “I yearned to have a stable normal life like other kids. But life was far from normal…” When I was 11 years old, on 3 occasions within a few months, mum and dad were arrested and taken away for questioning. On two of those occasions the police had run through our house, which terrified me and my little 4 year old brother. Mum and Dad usually returned within a few hours but were sometimes kept overnight. ‘Tough’ is a word you would think we would use a lot in our work in prisons. It’s true we do, but not so much about people but rather the difficult situations they face. Some of the toughest of burdens are carried by the innocent children of those who end up in prison. Whenever I think of all that young Natalie’s been through, I inevitably cringe and shake my head. Unfortunately, although I’ve known her for many years, our connection wasn’t made until it was almost time for her mum to be released. This is Natalie’s story. Eventually their case was heard in the County Court. The lawyers told my parents that they were pretty sure they wouldn’t get any jail time, but would probably get a Community Based Order. On the day of the court case I stayed home to look after my little brother and waited for a phone call. The whole day passed without any news. I was SO worried and couldn’t understand what was happening. Eventually at 7.30 at night I got a call from my Aunty to say that my dad had got 4 years jail and my mum 2 years. I couldn’t believe it! I was so shocked and scared and didn’t know what to do. My aunty said she’d pick us up sometime tomorrow so we were left on our own. I felt so overwhelmed. Where were they? Would I see them? Where were we going to live? It was horrible. The next night our Aunty came and we stayed with her for a few days. Then we went to stay with some friends of the family, but after a few weeks they said it was too much for them. Mum was scared we’d end up in foster care so we went to stay with another friend of hers who had a lot of problems of her own. She was addicted to heroin and other drugs. I remember over hearing a conversation she had with the school where she said we’d been “dumped on her.” We felt so lost and alone. I went to 3 different schools that year and missed mum and dad so much. I yearned to have a normal, stable life like other kids, but life was far from normal where we lived and I often had to play the parent to my little brother. We visited mum and dad about every 4-6 weeks and although we loved to see them, we were very scared of the prison officers who looked like police to us, and our experience with police hadn’t been at all good. Visits were short and it was all very traumatic. Some of the most difficult memories were during celebration times such as Christmas and birthdays. Seeing all my friends with their families when I couldn’t be home with mine was so hard. These times made me feel more out of place than what I already did. No matter how hard I pretended that everything was okay it was a cruel reminder that they were away. Being so young I didn’t understand why things had to be the way they were. It is so important for kids to be with their parents Due to no-one taking me to see my mum and dad regularly I became really sad, angry and depressed. All that was going through my mind was that I needed to see them. So one day I found a way. I went from North Carlton train station to the station near the prison at Deer Park and then walked 7kms to the jail to see my mum. My dad was moved to Fulham Prison in Sale so it was too far to go and see him. When I arrived it was about 7:00-7:30pm and all the prisoners were locked down for the night. The Prison Officers didn’t believe me when I said I’d walked all the way from the highway by myself, so they searched outside the prison to see if someone was with me. After numerous questions and expressing their frustration that I’d just turned up, they eventually believed that I just wanted to see my mum. They brought my mum out of lock down so I could see her and we both started crying when we saw each other. It took a couple of hours to find someone to pick me up and when they did, they yelled at me all the way home. Understanding the needs of kids with parents in prison is so important. I always felt no-one understood what I was going through and I was teased at school and looked at differently. Being able to see my parents was so important and to be able to say, “I had a great time with my mum at Christmas” regardless of her being in prison, meant so much to me. Natalie We have supported Natalie and her family for several years now and she often says that we saved her life. Well I’m not sure about that, but after many tough times she’s turned out to be a beautiful young woman and her mum and dad are both doing well. Natalie’s situation highlighted the need for us to facilitate even more visits for children to the prisons to see their mums. The prison Family Support staff contact us about ALL children who are unable to visit their mothers. For the children’s Christmas party at the prison this year, as with every year, we will collect children from all over Melbourne. We will also send a number off to summer camps. The next few months are times of high need. PNM is depending on the generosity of others through our Christmas Appeal to bring a little cheer to those who are doing it tough. Can you help? Laurel Fun with Mum Prison Network Ministries (PNM) are awesome. I’m struggling to find the right words to sum up all that they do for us women and our children. Fun with Mum is a program that runs fortnightly during child access visits. This program is one of the many programs facilitated by PNM. The activities are usually art and craft based and are activities enjoyed by all. The program eliminates the stress often experienced by mothers who struggle to provide activities that stimulate and entertain our children in a facility that offers next to nothing. Some of the activities my children and I have participated in include jewellery making, dress up’s, Christmas in July, mother’s day activities and of course the petting zoo, which by far has been the most enjoyable for both my children and I. The petting zoo is a day we all look forward to each year. PNM also provides art & craft sessions, gym, circuit and the much loved Game on Day. These programs promote health, fitness and activity which take us women away from the stagnant and mundane. I thank Prison Network for all they have done for me personally and all they do for us women. Thanks PNM! Prudence Fun with Mum (cont.) Finding myself an inmate at the Dame Phyllis Frost Centre at the age of 46, was something I could never have conceived as part of my life’s journey. I started to attend the Christian Discussion Group sessions as a way of showing my thanks to the PNM ladies. They quickly became my weekly time for peace and healing. As a mum to a 7 year old daughter, the separation from her is by far the most difficult thing to live with. Whilst a family member is usually able to bring my daughter in to visit me once a month, it is the Fun with Mum sessions that my daughter has filled in on her calendar and looks forward to... her very own special time with mum. My initial apprehension at allowing a ‘stranger’ to collect my child and bring her in to see me was short-lived upon meeting the PNM ladies, and hearing only great feedback from other inmates. The PNM ladies will forever hold a special place in my heart for always having a welcoming smile, being exceptional listeners and for their unconditional support. Both my daughter and I enjoy every minute of our Fun with Mum days and together we count down the number of sleeps to our next one. Sandy I have recently started volunteering with PNM at Fun with Mum once a month on a Sunday. When we are in the prison it feels very relaxed and busy at the same time with lots of children running around having fun! It’s a blessing and a joy to witness some of the beautiful interactions between the mums and their children whilst they are engaged in the activities that my colleagues have organised. It is also very moving to see the way many of the children who come to visit their mums support and encourage each other, and humbling when the mums share their appreciation of PNM’s work. I feel very privileged to have been given the opportunity to be involved in this ministry and I praise and thank God for the relationships that are being built between the mothers and their children, despite their circumstances. Helena & Yes! I will help women and their families rebuild their lives. I will donate: $25 Frequency of donation: $50 $100 $ Once Monthly Quarterly Method of payment Credit Card:Visa MasterCardAmex Cheque or Money order (made payable to Prison Network Ministries) Please print your details Name Name on card Address Card no. Suburb/TownPostcode Telephone Email I require a tax deductible receipt (All donations over $2 are tax deductible). Expiry date Signature Please return this form to: Prison Network Ministries PO Box 46 Kerrimuir Vic 3129 PRISON NETWORK MINISTRIES | PO Box 46, KERRIMUIR VIC. 3129 Phone: (03) 9873 4190 | Email: [email protected] Website: www.prisonnetwork.org.au