What is Domestic Violence? Domestic Violence is a pattern of abusive behavior used by one person to gain power and control over another in a relationship. This happens in all relationships, marital or cohabiting, in all sorts of social, racial, religious, ethnic, economic or educational status and sexual orientation. "Man cannot free himself from violence rather than through non-violence." Mahatma Gandhi. 1869-1948 Indian politician and philosopher The abuse may be in different forms such as sexual, verbal, emotional and financial. If you think your relationship fits this pattern, please read the following stages of domestic violence. The Domestic Violence Cycle The violence in the relationship has a cycle with three phases. These are presented one after another and are constantly repeated. There is no excuse for abuse Contact us: 1st phase: Tensions accumulate, the woman tries to maintain her aggressor comfortable to avoid him from exploding. 2nd phase: The aggressor explodes with any pretext, blaming the woman of his reaction. The aggressor makes the victim think that she deserves the punishment.. 3rd phase: Honeymoon. The aggressor regrets his actions and asks for forgiveness. She believes him because she thinks it will not happen again. However, the situation will be repeated over and over, each time with greater risk for the victim. Servicios Latinos de Burlington County 1 High Street Mount Holly, 08060 NJ (609) 518-7171 [email protected] State Office of Victim Witness Advocacy Department of Law & Public Safety Division of Criminal Justice 25 Market Street– P.O. Box 085 Trenton, New Jersey 08625-0085 Servicios Latinos de Burlington County 1. Accumulation of Tensions Stage. In this first stage tensions build. She is afraid because she feels and knows that the man is about to explode, and it can be about anything; everything that happens at home gets him angry, small things like the meal not being on time, or that the children play, cry or laugh out loud. Despite all her efforts keeping him comfortable, tension continues to rise and the aggressor is increasingly irritable. Other factors are criticism, mocks, keeping the victim isolated from friends and family, controlling everything she does, etc.. 2. Phase of violent explosion or acute incident. At this stage the abuser loses control and explodes against the victim, assaulting her physical, psychological or sexually, or all of the above, blaming her for the attack, because according to the aggressor, the woman caused his reaction and therefore deserves the punishment. Servicios Latinos Program for Domestic Violence Prevention We can help: • One on one Counseling; • Group Counseling; • Education about Domestic Violence; • Planning safety measures; • Shelter Information • A place you can ask for help. For more information, Call (609) 518-7171 Total confidentiality is assured.. Our services are free. all the family! Domestic violence is an extremely serious issue. It can have a huge range of consequences if it is not dealt with ASAP. It is NOT “OK”. Domestic violence affects the whole family. It never resolves conflicts, only creates more problems between families. 3. Honeymoon Phase or Reconciliation. At this stage the offender repents and apologizes to the victim, she believes him because she thinks another violent event won´t ever happen again, but the cycle occurs again and again, until something fatal happens. Years may even pass and this cycle repeats with increasing violence, leaving serious psychological and physical consequences, resulting even on the death of the victim or victims. Domestic violence affects It can be physical, emotional or mental, from man to woman, woman to man, father to siblings. Domestic Violence does not discriminate on race, color, age, or sex. Program for Domestic Violence Prevention