Leading and Teaching Through Listening
What is Real Listening? Listening/Counseling Components Related Concepts and Tasks 1. LISTEN Listening as a process 2. ENCOURAGE THE STUDENT TO TALK Taking an accepting stance, withholding judgment and advice 3. FIND THE FEELING Feelings are the facts 4. CLARIFY Paraphrasing and clarifying what you hear 5. PROVIDE SUPPORT 6. SCHEDULE CONVERSATIONS AS NEEDED Joining with the student in looking at their experience Take your time, adjust to reality of counseling on the run 7. DON’T TRY TO FIX IT 8. KEEP YOURSELF SEPARATE Being connected yet separate 9. KNOW YOURSELF AND BE YOURSELF Understanding your limits, your strengths and challenges 10. MAINTAIN CONFIDENTIALITY Difference between confidentiality and secrecy 11. APPROACH FROM POSITION OF COMPASSIONATE CURIOSITY What is needed for adults to “counsel” students in your school? * Support for teachers/advisors to switch to counseling when needed. * Skill development so that adults can really listen in those moments * An ongoing connection with the school counseling program * A school climate of mutual respect and trust among adults * Respect for students and their need for confidentiality * Commitment to a different type of connection with students * Resources for consultation and referral Stanley H. King Counseling Institute www.shkingcounseling.org
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